 Good afternoon, Aspie Legion. Welcome back to another video with me, Mr Thomas Henley. Bitty Thomas Henley coming back to you with a fresh new vid, um, after a long time of recording. We've had a string of mental health and depression-style videos lately so today we're gonna do a little bit more on the autism side of life, side of life. And today I'm going to give you eight reasons why Aspie's make good partners for life in a lovely sort of fashion. All coming at you soon. Quickly dodge it. Ah, you missed it. I got you. Let's get into it. One of the more annoying things about human race is that the more sort of mean and nasty people who generally sow quite a lot of confidence and are a bit more kind of teasy, generally seem to get all the guys and girls when it comes to relationships. Now I know this is a bit of an over-generalization but something about sort of mean and nasty people that get you a bit, some people a little bit excited. I mean, nothing cooler than a badass but when it comes to a long, long-standing relationship, you want someone to depend on, someone who cares for you, someone who is not gonna treat you like trash. Autistic people do have some difficulties in social interaction and for a lot of, a lot of people, a lot of the redeeming qualities that we have, such as the confidence and all the other things that I'm gonna go into soon so don't worry about that. All of those things are sort of overlooked because we don't really communicate our personality that much through our speech and body language unless we try to learn it just through, you know, researching and observing people. So let's get into the eight reasons why Aspies are amazing lures. I've done that too many times. This is creepy, no? Plus it's charm. Number one, a desire to love, to care and an immense appreciation for yourself as a partner. One of the general sort of bog standard things about being on the spectrum is that we tend to have a little bit lower quality of life. We have a lower quality of life and that is due to our mental health problems and also the facts that we have a hard time in schools. We get bullied, we get isolated, generally don't do that good on the dating sort of scene and for a lot of us that can make us very appreciative of the people who are around in our life, especially after school and when we're in our adulthood, in our adulthood, any age. We don't tend to open up to a lot of people and for a good reason because as I said, we generally don't have a good experience with people in life and so when we find someone that we can deeply connect with, someone that we can have a heart to heart to, that connection is a lot stronger in comparison to the friendships and things that we have going on in our other life. If you find that an autistic person is making a lot of effort to try and socialize with you, interact with you, try and share emotions and experiences, this means that they're putting a lot of effort into you because although we do develop strong connections with people, it's still quite stressful. It's like a little bit of a higher level, you know, like a 50% increase in the daily sort of normal stress that people have talking to people. If you love us and respect us and put effort into the relationship, chances are you're going to get a lot back in return. You'll realize from being with an autistic person that we can have a bit more of a different angle on the situation, we can view it concretely. If you're having a problem in your life with some people, talking to your autistic partner can be quite refreshing and it can really give you a concrete angle on the situation that will allow you to deal with it emotionally. It's not in all cases, I know, but in most cases and definitely the cases that I have experienced and seen and heard about in my life experience with other people as well. Number three. Number three. It can be very tempting sometimes to get lost in the landscape of trends and popularity, stuff, clothing line, whatever, games. So sometimes it can be quite refreshing to find someone who isn't just another statue, you know, it's just another porn on a chessboard. Uniqueness is something that gives variety to your life and an autistic person is a great example of that unique person. Growing up, we don't really have a concept of the importance of liking things that other people like. It doesn't really come into a factor with us until we, you know, reach adulthood and realize why people were liking the same things, probably because they wanted to make friends and build connections with those friends. Because we don't really have the concepts of this at a young age, we tend to just branch off to anything that we like, anything that we're passionate about. Doesn't matter if they're related or not, you know, maybe we might enter heavy metal music and we might like cooking and baking and we might even, you know, like go in walks and for walks in the field, long strolls on the beach. Passion is a very powerful thing. It shows people that you are strong-willed and that you, if you like something, if you like anybody, if you like an interest, you will pursue that interest on that person to the end of the earth and try your very hardest with it. And that is a very attractive quality for some people. Some people just like good looks and more shallow and stuff. Get those people out. We want some cool people. Number four, just a little one this time. People on the autistic spectrum as bees tend to have a higher IQ than your normal person, average person. People don't like the word normal. I don't know why. Just normal, average, the same thing. It's not getting triggered. Not only does it raise our IQ by an average of eight points, it also gives us a very factual and logical type mind. If you like to learn stuff, if you like to improve on stuff or just learn new interesting things about the world around you, chances are, if you're with an autistic person, you're gonna get pelted by facts from all kinds of sources and directions. We tend to remember a lot of things that we find interesting. The stuff that we don't find interesting just goes straight over our heads. It's kind of like the brain, how our brain works. We absorb things that we're very concentrated on. If we like it, we're very concentrated on it. If we don't like it. You will learn a lot from us because we like to share our information with other people because we like to learn it ourselves. Number five, can be very easy for people these days to hide how they truly feel. A lot of people tend to sort of push aside the sort of the mini sort of minor inconveniences and upsets that you have in a relationship just to save confrontation. One of the main characteristics of someone on the spectrum is that we are very blunt. Blunt in a good way because we are always honest. I have never met an autistic person that could lie and even if they could lie, it's gonna make them feel really uncomfortable and they're probably gonna tell you at some point anyway. We have a very strong moral compass and we do not like lying at all. This can be very good for a relationship because if you imagine being married to someone and that type of behaviour, that sort of pushing stuff to the side and not confronting it and moving on in the relationship is not very good. It's not very healthy. But when you are with an autistic person, that stuff will be brought out in the open as quick as you can think about it and you will move on with it. This is not sort of a general rule for everybody. Obviously people who aren't very experienced in relationships, probably not gonna do this as much. But people who are a bit more confident if you find a confident autistic person, they are likely to try and resolve situations rather than cause confrontation. So don't get frightened away. There's kind ones out there. There's nice ones there. That's creepy. Stop it Tom. Does my butt look big in this? Yes. Number six. We're going on to a two-hander now. We're getting close. We're getting close to the finish line. Pow. Despite how we may appear and how we communicate with other people, autistic people generally tend to be quite confident. Now most of the confident people that you see, like people who work in movies, actors, singers, anyone who is a sportsman, probably have a lot of confidence talking on camera and displaying that sort of confident body posh, you know, very open, back straight, arms out very open. The thing is that even if an autistic person is the most confident individual in your town or your city or entire world, you probably won't be able to appreciate it just by looking at them or speaking to them. This confidence usually comes in areas other than social communication, meaning that they will be very confident in certain scenarios where they're passionate about something such as an interest, whether it be gaming, probably not a good one, but anything that they're passionate about and they like doing, they are going to be confident very confident. In general, social communication is quite hard for us. It can be very, very stressful, consumes a lot, a lot of energy, so having the confidence to just go to like parties, if you find an autistic person at a party, it's a good hint that they're probably quite confident. Confidence is attractive. We like it, shows strength, mental clarity, mental strength, and they will make your life better. Number seven, a little bit of a crossover with one of the other points I know, so don't bash me for it. And if you want to bash me for it anyway, I don't care. Bring it on. Aspes, we like to have very strict rules in this stressful world that we don't really understand. The most stressful things are the things that don't have rules, such as social communication, especially in environments where there is no set rule of conduct. Because of this, a lot of autistic people I've found in my life, especially with myself, we like to have strict rules on everything, not meaning that there's strict rules on yourself per se, although there might be in some cases, you'll have to confront them about it, you know, maybe write out a bit of the contract, write some rules, have some strikes on the rule board when you've been a naughty person. If something makes sense, we will run with it. We will take it into our little bank of what we should and shouldn't do, and we will use it. Meaning that if we are parented correctly, or we are exposed to moral dilemmas, and we learn from of people the correct way of behaving, it's likely that we're gonna do that, only if it makes sense to us. This means that we are incredibly trustworthy. You're probably not going to find a more sort of trustworthy and honest subcategory of people on planet earth. If they do something wrong and they're rude, it's probably not intentional at all. It's usually just due to a miscommunication or a misunderstanding of how to act in a certain situation. We like to be careful in life because life is a scary place for us, especially during teenage years. As I've said, we have a lot of upsetting and rude interactions with people, I mean from their part, nasty people that we have to deal with. This is because we appear so vulnerable, especially during teenage years, and because of this we've had to develop ways to deal with rude and aggressive people. This means that if you find yourself in a bad situation, when there is a rude or aggressive person, they can be an incredible tool both physically at the time, and also someone to refer back to. We empathise a lot with people who are mistreated, emotionally or physically. Because of this we tend to be the protector. We try to protect people. We want to make sure that everybody that we love and that we care about is having a good time and no one's mistreating them. This can be a very good thing because they can really help you get an idea of the bad and the good people in your life, meaning that if you've got a lot of negative people who are draining your energy, they will tell you, they will concretely tell you this person is taking advantage of you and you can take steps to removing them from your life and that is an amazing tool, an amazing thing to have in a partner. So that just about does it for today's video. I know it's been a little bit of a sort of broad video as I've said, there's always going to be some people that are like, hey look, my autistic boyfriend or girlfriend, they're being a jerk in some way or fashion. There are people out there who don't fit the mould, there are nasty people, depending on what they're upbringing, but this is more of a general sort of video one, the personality traits that I've picked upon in myself and in my autistic friends. Therefore, if you have a bad experience like this or maybe you're autistic watching this and thinking, hey, I don't have any of these qualities, what are you talking about Tom? That's okay, everyone's different. I'm just trying to speak as generally as possible and sometimes it might not apply to everybody. Also, if you do have a relationship with an autistic person and you don't identify with these qualities at all, consider doing a bit more research into autism and try and distinguish what is a miscommunication. Now, maybe you think that they're being rude or not considerate of your feelings, talk to them, try and figure it out. If not, you know, they could be a bad egg in that case, but in a bin. Leave it, leave it to rot. Thank you very much for watching social media accounts down in here, down somewhere over here, you can find it. Now it's going to be over here, right here. There we go, there we go, it's there, it's good, good. You want to check that stuff out, just follow me, see what the life of Tom is like. Head over to that, please. Patreon account up there, make sure to like and comment if you want to. Tell me what you think, was I right on some things? Do you think I'm a bit, being a bit too specific? Do you think there's some qualities on this list that don't really fit the bill for an autistic person? Let me know, I want to hear your opinions. Put them down there. And if you want to see some more videos from the Tomster, make sure to hit that subscribe button. It's up here, I forget. Always do the wrong side. It's like a mirror to this camera. It's always fooling me. This has been Mr. Thomas only addressing the asked me legion and just anybody else who happens to find themselves on this lovely little platform I got here, lovely little community. Are you tired of all those dishonest and unloving, unappreciative people in your life? Do you need someone with a bit of uniqueness and confidence and passion about them? But it's also just a bit of compassion. Bit more of a deeper connection that you won't find anywhere else. Well, well, well, you might want to look for an autistic person. They could be the remedy for you. See you later, guys.