 That's what made you buy it. And that's the thing, is when a woman decides to have sex with you, it's not because of she's logically done a checklist. Because women do have a checklist, I want a guy who's funny and confident and something and something and something. And I love talking to girls about this. I say, oh, so what are you liking a man? And they'll give me the Clio checklist, and I'll say, yeah, cool. So the last three men that you slept with, would you say that these features were high on the list of who they were? And the girls like, no, no, I was like, well, any of them? Were they sort of prevalent? Not really. So why did you decide to sleep with those men? I asked that of a Ukrainian girl recently who'd slept with me, and she was telling me what kind of guy she wanted after we had sex. I want the rich man who has this kind of car and something, something. I said, okay, that's interesting. Why are we in bed together? And she said, ask me a different question. Because the decision for a woman to have sex with a man is not really based on these logical things of what she should be with. It's because she suddenly had a feeling that she wanted to be with this guy. And of course, what we want to know is, how do we elicit that feeling? How do we make a girl feel like she wants to have sex with us? Well, by coming to have a clear understanding of the way her emotional processes work. Again, we have to know our market if we want to be able to sell to it. We need to know what the desires are. What a woman's looking for, really, or what's going to influence her decision making, all boils down to this core principle, which I've talked about previously. It's the idea of emotional pressure and emotional release. Emotional pressure and emotional resolution. Every time you feel an emotion, it's always building to a resolution. And if you look at drama in media, it's always based around that. Every story that is compelling is built around the build up of tension to a resolution. So in a romantic comedy or whatever, guy meets girl, girl meets guy. They kind of like each other. They fumblingly get together something. They start a romance, but then there's a misunderstanding because she thought that he was cheating on her with her sister, but really they were just practicing like how he would do something romantic for her. And she busts in at wrong time and then there's all this drama. And there's this tension built up of that they don't understand each other and are they going to be together anymore or whatever. And then it reaches a point where the truth comes out and they realize that they love each other happily ever after. And there's this resolution and a release and a relaxation. Or if we look at in terms of a horror movie, in horror movies, they use pretty much just a very, very cheap but powerful and effective emotional manipulation of build up of pressure. So point of view camera going through the forest, coming and then there's a girl having a shower for some reason in the log cabin. And it zooms in on her and there's this build up of tension of what's going to happen, yeah? And then suddenly she gets stabbed and that's resolution. Everyone relaxes, yeah? And that's the cheap thrill you get out of those movies, she's dead, yeah? The reason women get so sick of and get bored of nice men, and many of you guys are probably in this category and I know I was myself, is because there is no pressure built up. The girl doesn't feel any wavelength of emotion happening. Because if you are always nice and pleasant to somebody, then there's no pressure. If you agree with everything, if you nodded everything, yeah? If you always do what she wants to do, if you're always trying to second guess what she wants, if you're always trying to be nice, then you may think, okay, I'm trying to deliver to her what she wants. So therefore she'll have sex with me. Doesn't work like that, because what she wants is an emotional drama on these small and large levels. Women love drama and I'm talking about this necessarily in a destructive sense, because that can be an expression of it, of course, if it gets out of control. And a man and a woman who are constantly in this violent spikes, peaks and troughs of drama, it's not going to be a healthy relationship. But the fact that there is an emotional pressure and there's two characters pushing up against each other and vying for each other's attentions with their agendas, cross-pollinating and pressing against each other is what makes it exciting, makes it interesting. Women will often talk about, they start dating a guy and they'll say that they just wasn't a spark. You've heard, I mean, you may have had a girl say that to you. It's like I really like you as a friend, but I just don't feel it. And you're like, why? I mean, logically on the ABC checklist, I've got these things that you wanted, right? She's like, just not feeling it. What does she mean by that? She means I'm not feeling a range of emotions. I'm not feeling challenged. I'm not feeling like you're listening to me. There's a whole lot of things in terms of her emotional needs that are not being met by that really nice guy. And on the other end, like I know a lot of girls who went through a period where once they worked out that they were sexy and they wanted to get the best men they could, they went after guys who were in bands or DJs or the really cool guys. And then soon discovered that there was a certain need that needed to be met there. So they had the challenge of like, can I get this guy who all the other girls want that therefore that validates me and means that I'm pretty and I'm significant and they start getting that kind of guy. But there's something missing from that relationship as well. Because this guy is just taking because he can. Because girls just give him stuff. It's the flip, yeah? And so after a while of that kind of experience, I know a lot of girls who say, I don't date musicians, yeah? Why do they say that? Because they've dated musicians, yeah? Because at some point in their life they want, I want to be with guys in bands that might get famous one day. That's why girls have sex with guys who are in bands that aren't famous yet because they might get famous. No girls have sex with you once they know your band's not going to be famous anymore. Yeah, which is why I had to move into dating coaching. So she sees in that situation where I came, my needs are not being met in terms of having an understanding or having this man care about me because it's all just about him. The balance is going to be in between. You need to be able to create pressure in a situation with a girl. You need to be able to not put up with her bratty behavior. Because a woman wants a man who will stand up to her as well as understand her. And a lot of guys are interested in really what they would call high maintenance girls. Yeah, girls who are used to being treated in a certain way, used to guys buying them stuff because these girls are really pretty. And I had a guy once ask me, well, I want to be with these kind of Gucci girls and stuff, but I don't want to high maintenance girls. So how do I deal with that? And I said, don't maintain her highly. That's it. Because the only reason a girl feels entitled to getting a whole lot of free stuff and attention or whatever else from man for nothing is because a whole bunch of idiots gave her stuff for nothing. Yeah, I was dating this Russian girl some years ago, another Russian, a different Russian. And she was a physicist and a model and from a very rich family. This chick was way smarter than me, way better connected, way richer. Like this was a very high value girl. And I remember we'd been dating for some time and we hadn't had sex yet. But we'd been kissing and hanging out and things were building to something. And we agreed to meet at a bar. And I came in and I saw her, I walked up and I said, hey, Nadia, put my arm around her and I pulled her into kiss her and she went like this. All right, turned her head away. This was not the first time we'd kissed. In that moment, she did that almost probably unconsciously. Just as a way of going, I'm this, I'm Nadia and I can do whatever I want. Right now I just feel like bing-a-bitch, yeah. And I just stepped back and I said, Nadia. If you ever do that to me in public again, we're done. What would you like to drink? Do you think she ever did that again? No fucking way, because no man had ever done that. Men had certainly reactively gone, oh, bitch, why are you, I'm not putting up with this anymore. Yeah, way too late, yeah. But no man had ever calmly said, boundary crossed, treat me with respect, or I'll walk. Because I would have, because I have choice. I don't have to put up with that. So in that moment, this high maintenance girl suddenly realized, well, okay, I need to start playing on his level. I need to show him respect, or he'll walk out of my life, oh, and I don't want that. I desperately don't want that. Yeah, after that, she was a lovely person who just played at an equal level. The reason women test you, because the guys are always saying, yeah, well, she's been shit testing me a lot or whatever else, you need to look at it again, well, why is a woman doing that? Why is she poking at her men in her life? Is that just because women are nasty, evil creatures, yeah, that wanna just make you feel bad? No, we need to look at it again from her perspective. Men come into her life, and of course, they're trying to show that I am awesome, and I have all this stuff going for me, and you should choose to be with me. And yet, she knows that many men are not what they seem to be. And so what she starts to do, is she just starts to poke at him and see what he's made of. A shit test, it's a wrong way to look at it. This is a masculinity test, because what she's doing is she's going, if I push this button, his reaction will determine his character. Does that make sense? His reaction will determine his character, because it's all well and good for a guy who's a decent actor to be able to go, here I am, I'm confident, and this is what I am, I'm Alpha and a leader, and all that kind of stuff. I have DHVs, but it's what he does when suddenly the roadmap disappears or he's out of control, that determines actually what kind of guy he's gonna be. Girls do this, they will play little games with you, they will test you, not just because they're being drama queens and are being bitches, it's because they need to, they must, test what kind of man you are. I love it when a girl starts testing me, because that means, well firstly she's interested, she wouldn't bother otherwise, and secondly because I'm pretty sure I can pass those tests, because I'm okay with myself and I'm not gonna be reactive.