 The Great Automatic Grammatisator. Read by Will Self. Well, Nip, my boy, now that it's all finished, I just called you in to tell you I think you've done a fine job. Adolf Nip stood still in front of Mr. Boland's desk. There seemed to be no enthusiasm in him at all. Aren't you pleased? Oh, yes, Mr. Boland. Did you see what the papers said this morning? No, sir, I didn't. The man behind the desk pulled a folded newspaper towards him and began to read. The building of the Great Automatic Computing Engine, ordered by the government some time ago, is now complete. It is probably the fastest electronic calculating machine in the world today. Its function is to satisfy the ever-increasing need of science, industry, and administration for rapid mathematical calculation, which, in the past, by traditional methods, would have been physically impossible or would have required more time than the problems justified. The speed with which the new engine works, said Mr. John Boland, head of the firm of electrical engineers, mainly responsible for its construction, may be grasped by the fact that it can provide the correct answer in five seconds to a problem that would occupy a mathematician for a month. In three minutes, it can produce a calculation that, by hand, if it were possible, would fill half a million sheets of fool's cap paper. The automatic computing engine uses pulses of electricity generated at the rate of a million a second to solve all calculations that resolve themselves into addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division. For practical purposes, there is no limit to what it can do. Mr. Boland glanced up at the long, melancholy face of the younger man. Aren't you proud, Nipe? Aren't you pleased? Of course, Mr. Boland. I don't think I have to remind you that your own contribution, especially to the original plans, was an important one. In fact, I might go so far as to say that without you and some of your ideas, this project might still be on the drawing boards today. Adolf Neip moved his feet on the carpet, and he watched the two small white hands of his chief, the nervous fingers playing with the paperclip, unbending it, straightening out the hairpin curves. He didn't like the man's hands. He didn't like his face, either, with the tiny mouth and the narrow, purple-colored lips. It was unpleasant the way only the lower lip moved when he talked. Is anything but— Sample complete. Ready to continue?