 Your coca-cola bottler presents Claudia based on the famous play and novels by Rose Franken Brought to you transcribed Monday through Friday by your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola Relax and while you're listening refresh yourself have a coke and now Claudia Listen David, you don't have to be so gloomy about it. I'm not gloomy We haven't said a word since we left the house for which you should be very grateful I don't see what's so terrible about you're having to drive me down to the village to take a driver's test Oh, you don't huh besides now remember I didn't ask you you offered well I had to I would have been perfectly delighted to drive down by myself. That's just the point Can't I make you understand? Understand what? That you're not supposed to drive yourself when you don't have a license But I do have a license the whole year you were with me the day I passed it. Now you ever got it I'll never know when I got a bamboozled the man into giving it to you. Let's not go through that David not the last time Don't worry about me driving. You're not supposed to drive unless you have your license with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah If you've lost it you either have to pay the penalty of not driving until you find it That's your bad waiting till the Bureau of Licenses send you another or you do what we're doing Go down and take a test. Well, I think what we're doing is silly You're entitled to your opinion No, it doesn't seem to do me any good I don't want to have to take another driver's test. What's the matter afraid you can't pass it Listen to him. I can pass it with my eyes shut. Well, sometimes I think you drive with your eyes shut Listen now now listen here. You volunteered to drive me downtown. So don't be so disagreeable about it Unless you just volunteered because you think I'll fail now. I'm accused of being disagreeable. Sorry. Look darling. I Thought the best thing for everybody concerned seeing as you lost your license was just to drive down to Eastbrook and take a test for a Connecticut license After all since you're a Connecticut Yankee, you might as well drive with a Connecticut license. It's just a lot of Balderdash What is well if I can pass a test for a license in New York Why do I have to take another one for a license in Connecticut because it's the law Whenever men do things in a silly way. They always say it's the law I think we women ought to get together and straighten out the law. You will certainly let it get awfully complicated Every state has its own driving regulations. You want a license in that state you observe those regulations. That's all risk What's the matter doesn't Connecticut have any respect for New York? Connecticut loves New York. New York thinks I'm all right I suppose they told you personally after all driving is the same in Connecticut as is in New York. No, no On easier not happy traffic But you certainly drive the same way you drive on the right you put your hand out step on the clutch stop when the lights This is an awful waste of time. I don't lead a net need a lesson. I should have known Yeah, I am staying away from the office just so I can get a get you a license and all I get is complaints excuses Actually, I think it's awfully sweet if you David. I do you do this whole business of a license. It just seems Well, I suppose since it's the law Exactly how long have you been driving around without a license? I have a license. It's just lost how long I Don't know. I just found out that I lost it a few weeks ago. So Well, it couldn't be a few weeks ago. Yeah, so it couldn't be very long Don't you realize what would happen if you were caught running around without a license? I don't realize what You would have been fine for breaking the law. That's what it's a misdemeanor running around without a license Nobody caught me. It's lucky. You have no moral sense. What's oh, I have a lot of moral sense But if a person can drive well a person can drive For the footing is I haven't had an accident No knock on wood. I had an accident and they would have found out that I'd lost my license Well, that would serve me right but since I'm an excellent driver. It's not of anybody's business. No point in arguing I can see that not Where do you think you lost your license? If I knew I'd find it again. Oh Darling haven't you ever lost your I have not I'm just grateful. I found out about you now the thought of you gallivanting around the countryside Did you make it sound like a crime? It is a crime a little misdemeanor. You said so yourself I had to marry a woman most men do oh David come on. Let's not argue. I'm perfectly willing to take another test I'm just sorry that it's such a waste of time for you Well, it is a waste of time for me. You just remember that well, then you should have let me drive down time by myself That's the whole point. You can't drive without a license. I can perfectly have for weeks I give up Like heavens we're here. I bet you don't think I can pass a driver's license test in Connecticut I wouldn't stake my life on it Certainly lovely when a person's husband believes in that person so it fills a person with such Trouble with that person's driving is you have too much confidence not enough talent. Oh, sweet and sweet David Why are you so grumpy? I'm not grumpy. Well, you are is it because you love me I Suppose so. It's so awful to love me dear dear pretty awful Guess so Well, here we are there is the town hall. That woman will get out of the way. I can park the car right here on the street Oh David you you'll come with me when I drive the little man around won't you we'll see So he wouldn't he wouldn't be going to ask me to park it in backwards who you probably talk him out of it Well, after all I have a license from New York State, so why should he please let's let's just not go through all that again Say is this going to take very long and just depends on you good Then I can drive you to the station. Well, if you pass your test, they'll give you a temporary license All right, here we go Now watch out crossing the street. I'm watching The only license I'll give you is to a cemetery. Claudia. Didn't you see that car? I saw it. He didn't see me Honestly the way some people Have you at least brought identification of me of course of you. I brought you you can tell him who I am Won't be enough Don't you have written identification? Well, I always use my license as you know it's lost so we'll just have to hope the police sergeant trust you Oh It's gonna be a policeman. I expect so. Oh Well still there you see kind of nice. They always have wives and children at home Makes a difference in a man. I should say it does Bureau of licenses it should be on the main floor Marriage licenses to wish we're getting a marriage life. Oh, we have one already and one is sufficient You know our marriage licenses for New York State, David It'd be nice if we could get one for Connecticut like a driver's license miss is not and someday I will know whether you mean that when you say things like that and I come on here. We are Is this where we apply for the driver's license it is My wife would like to apply for a driver's license. Does she know how to drive? Of course I know how to drive off. So this is purely a routine matter I I have my driving license from New York State and that show me a license Well, I've lost it. That's why do you think I'd be here? We've taken up residence here in Connecticut officer So I thought my wife might just as well have a Connecticut license. I'll have to put it through the test Officer can't you take my word for it a woman's worried on her driving. Look lady. I'm a married man. Well, that's nice I thought you'd be you were saying officer now. Here's the formula fill out and here's the reading chart Unfortunately, I know how to read the officer cannot take your word for it. Don't I look as if I knew how to read no Now what does reading have to do with driving anyway, this is so far fetched a You wouldn't know but they do put up signs for the side of the road, you know, like Like you turn not allowed or stop signs which you never notice. I've seen them It's nice to know we'll give you the eye test first. Oh, let's get to the driving part My husband has kept the change the officers interested in you not me read this chart, ma'am Oh, you can skip that. I have wonderful eyes. I can see a mile right close up. Read the chart ma'am. All right From the top of the bottom from the top LPQ assay who decides what order to put these letters? No, nobody decides somebody must order these letters has nothing to do with anything Is it just pot luck? Do you think I'm yes, ma'am? Just pot luck the job man the second line if it's not too much trouble No, not at all PBF M as in Mary Q. How am I doing superb? Go on. Oh look now. This is really silly My husband has to catch a train then read stop talking The third line man, please QWCH J. All right, that'll do Wait a minute. I didn't finish. I was just getting interested. That'll do now this card. What color is it? Green what is green used for grass Claudia? This is no time for joking. He only wants to find out if you're color-blind That's no way to find out even a color-blind person and know that screen. How? Because it's green I'll explain to you about color blindness later. What color is this card red of course people who want licenses utterly morons Some people. Yeah, all right, ma'am. You can see we've proved that much I could have told you that in the first place now What else do I have to do officer the car is right outside? Not so fast red tape This is red tape. Are you filling out the form? Yes, I'm filling it out age How old am I 19? Wait height five foot three and a half. Oh I quibble. I'll make it five feet four even. It's nice of you color of my eyes Hey, you got your identification with you Well, that is why I'm filling out my driver's license. So I'll have some identity ma'am What do you have to prove that you're you? Well, who else could I be? Oh, ma'am. Listen, all right All right, David you show him yours your license approval. Well, my New York driver's license. Do officer. Oh, yeah, do fine Just a minute. It's in my wallet one of my pockets Not this one must be back here. Why do they make men's clothes with so many pockets they can never find anything Oh, yeah, the color of my hair. I forgot You can't understand it always take my wallet with me. I must have it here Officer, I don't understand it, but and I Seem to have forgotten my wallet and left it in another pair of trousers or something and all my identifications are In my wallet. I guess that settles that David Do you mean that you have you don't have your driver's license with you? It would seem that David Norton Do you mean to say that you have been driving your car yalla bounding all around the country side without your driver's license? No license, huh? Well, it's just a mistake. It's the first time I forgot no license David it's a misdemeanor Who drove the car down here from River Road? Oh, he did officer because I didn't have my license I wouldn't dream of driving the car around about a license Just wait until I get my hands on it. Mm-hmm The state of Connecticut has a habit of collecting three dollars for people who drive without a license now wait a minute now They can't do this to me. I tell you it's a matter of however, however Seen as I didn't actually see you drive up without a license I'll tell you what I'm going to do If the little lady compares the driving test I'll give her a temporary license and let her drive you home I have an idea that I better be good. I have an idea. You'd better be good or else When you're in need of refreshment the site of a bright red cooler with coca-cola printed on it Is as welcome as the flowers in May But you don't need a red cooler at home. You already have a white cooler of your own Your family refrigerator will hold coke galore for the family needs and for entertaining as well Keep it well stocked, then you'll always have access to the pause that refreshes Young folks don't seem to have much for knife for the Lord these days. Do they mr. King? Well, this is one of those unfortunate moments officer usually David is very considerate of the law He is still you have to find them when they break it I guess so he's gonna have a hard time living this one down now Yeah, too bad his wife was along hate to find a man when his wife's along, but it's my duty Well having a wife makes a lot of things different for a man an awful lot of things Oh, you're telling me for instance without a wife David would paint the porch furniture in the spring But with Claudia he paints it in the fall and all he can do is complain. It's a tough life for a husband Well, I bet if you're getting home to my wife or officer of the law or not. She'll lay it down on it Well so long officer Every day Monday through Friday Claudia comes to you transcribed with the best wishes of your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola So listen again tomorrow at the same time And now this is Joe King saying or a bar and remember Whoever you are whatever you do wherever you may be When you think of refreshment think of coca-cola or coca-cola makes any pause the pause that refreshes and Ice-cold coca-cola is everywhere These broadcasts are adapted for radio by mania star and the entire production is supervised and directed by William Brown Maloney Now here's a word from your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola