 Hello everyone, welcome again to another NARC Survivor Live video. In this one I have a very important topic for you and as the title reads, you won't believe this about the narcissist. And I know that this is something that many of you will not believe. And the reason why you won't believe it is because they targeted your self-esteem. They caused you to doubt yourself and your own abilities. Everything that makes you who you are, they caused you to doubt that. And they also caused you to believe in their false character and the illusion of being so much greater than what they actually are. And that is why you won't believe this, what I am about to say in this video. And that is why I am going to drill at home as much as I can to make sure that you do believe it. Because as we know I only speak the truth on this channel. I'm going to give it to you exactly how it is. So yeah, this is it. You won't believe this about the narcissist. Before I get into it, please hit that thumbs up button down below as it helps the YouTube algorithm to get this message out there to other survivors who may need to see it as well. Alright, this is it. You won't believe this about the narcissist. But I can tell you that this is the 100% truth. Here it is. You won't believe this. You know why the narcissist treated you that way. You know why they turned against you. Why they devalued you. Why they did all of those hurtful things to you. You want to know why they did that. I can tell you why. But I got a good feeling that you won't believe it. Because many of you have been brainwashed by these narcissists. They've caused you to doubt yourself. They've caused you to believe in their lies and delusions. But here it is. What you won't believe about the narcissist. But what is the 100% truth? And it's the reason why they did all of those hurtful things to you. Why they turned against you. The reason why is because they knew fully well. That they are not good enough for you. Yes, that is the actual truth. And in fact, if they actually believed that they were good enough for you. Then they would never have turned against you. They never would have done all of those hurtful things to you. In fact, the reason for all of that is because they knew they're not good enough for you. Yes, believe it or not, that is actually the reason why. And if that's not enough, we're going to get a lot deeper into it in this video. To really confirm that this is the actual truth. Because what happened? I mean, at some point, they targeted you. They love bombed you. Everything seemed to be going well. And then things fell apart. But they didn't turn against you for no reason. They started feeling insecure. How a person treats you is a direct reflection of how they feel about themselves. So they began to feel insecure. They felt threatened by your qualities and abilities. Maybe you disapproved of something they said or did. And you may not have openly acknowledged it. But they're constantly scanning the environment for threats. They already know exactly what you think of them without you even saying anything. So as soon as they said or did something wrong, or just something you didn't like, immediately they began to feel insecure. And you've got to look at it like this. I mean, from the very beginning, they came in with a false character. They portrayed this illusion. They manipulated you. They lied to you. They future faked. What was all of that for? If you believe that you are good enough exactly as you are, why do you need a false character? Why do you need an illusion? Why do you need to lie, manipulate, future fake? If you really believe that you're good enough, what is all of that for? And as I said, how a person treats you is a direct reflection of how they feel about themselves. So when they go to devaluing you, it's because they already feel devalued in your presence, which they are then projecting onto you. And even when they go to discarding you, treating you with contempt, throwing you away like a piece of garbage, it's because that's exactly how they feel about themselves by that point. They see it as a lost cause, a means to an end. They know they have no value, no worth to provide to the relationship. And that's how they can so easily discard everything. Because by that point, you're already the beginning to see through them. So at that point, they have no use for it. And then they bring in another person. They triangulate you with someone. Why do they need to bring another person into it? Again, it's because they don't feel enough on their own. And then they start a smear campaign against you. They enforce all of their flying monkeys and enablers. What is the need for all of these people? Again, it's because they don't feel enough on their own. They've got this false character, but they don't feel powerful enough to take you down and destroy you. And at some point, you've got to look at it like, I mean, when you look back at the relationship, everything you did for them, everything you gave to them, you've got to look at it like, what on earth could they possibly do for you in return? How could they ever reciprocate that back to you? And when you look at it like that, it's like, what other choice do they have other than to turn against you? I mean, what else are they going to do? Are they going to try and work with you and make things better? How could they possibly do that? They've already wasted your life. You've lost years of your life to this person. You gave them everything you had. You've got nothing back in return. What could they possibly do to make up for that? There's nothing they can do and they know it. And so they look at it like, what's going to give them the advantage? What's going to put them in a position of power in that situation? Of course, it's not going to be by trying to work with you. Because you're above them, you're greater than them. You've provided and produced far more than they can ever dream of. So they've got no chance doing that. They can't compete with you in that arena. And they know it. They know that they are in way out of their heads. You're out of their league completely. They know they can't match you in that. They know they've met their match. And that's why they become so oppositional. Where the row is in disagreements. Because what else can they do if they work with you and try to cooperate? And at some point, someone has to take the leadership role. Of course, that person is going to be you. Because they're weak and ineffective. They can't hold any power over you naturally. They have to manipulate. They have to lie to you. Future fake. And in the beginning, you may buy into it. You may think that they're actually really about that. But give it time. Time reveals all. A certain amount of time goes by. You've given everything you've got. What have you got back in return? Nothing. And you've just lost all of your time, energy and resources to avoid a black hole. And that's all that there is. Of course, a person who has a void. They've got no inner sense of value. Of course, their best opportunity is to turn against you at the earliest opportunity. Because that's all they really can do. And they do it because they know they're not good enough for you. And yet they try to deflect that onto you. They shift the blame onto you. They project their insecurities onto you. They deny. They gaslight. I mean, you've just got to think, what is the gaslight in form? What is the purpose of that? Why do they have to mess with your mind and spin you around in circles? It's to confuse you. Because the reality is that, yes, you are superior to them in your abilities, in everything. And they know it. And they know that they're not going to gain any power by working with you. They know that's going to be unaffordable for them. Because automatically you're going to have to establish the authoritative role over them. Because you're superior to them in their accomplishment and ability. But they want to be the ones who are in control. Even though they may be weak and ineffective. And that's why they've got to break you down and turn against you. That's why they have to do that. And it's because they know they're not good enough for you. But as I said, many of you, you won't believe it. Just think of it like this. Look at everything you've done for them. Look at all of the time, energy and resources you've given to them. What have they ever reciprocated back to you? That's even a fraction of your value. You've upgraded their lives. They've done nothing for you. And just look at where they are in life. What on earth could they do for you? Could they even do anything for you that you couldn't do for yourself? Because if you look at it, you've done far more for them than they could ever do for themselves. You've done more for them than anyone has ever done in their entire lives for them. They're essentially like children in adult bodies. They can't do anything for themselves. It's like you need to get a push chair and just push them around everywhere. Stick a bottle in their mouth so you can feed them. Change their nappy every five minutes. Burp them. Because they're babies. They can't do anything for themselves. They have no independence. And this is why they hate your freedom and independence. Because if you're both free and equal, that's quickly going to reveal to everyone who is actually superior. And they don't like that. They don't want anyone to see that. They don't want anyone to know that in fact you are superior to them. You are far more capable than they could ever have been. They just don't want to accept it. They're in denial. And when you look at it, everything they do is an act of sustaining that denial. The lies, the manipulations, the future faking, the gaslighting, the devaluation, the discard. When they discard you, they're not really running from you. They're running from themselves. They're running from a reflection of themselves that they don't like. And then they go to the smear campaign, the triangulation, all acts of sustaining their denial and their false reality. And it's all because they know they're not good enough. That's why they do all of these things. Because otherwise, and this is what would happen, if they believed that they were good enough and they actually were good enough and knowing how great a person you are and what you're capable of, they would probably take the initiative and work with you. Yes, they would cooperate because it would be a no-brainer. Of course, if you can do all of these great things for them, which you have done already, and they were capable, they were good enough, they were on your level and they worked with you, that would multiply the success, which means there would be a much greater payoff for them. And just think, what narcissist is going to refuse that? So why didn't they do that? Why didn't they take that initiative? And of course, the only possible explanation is because they knew they weren't capable of doing that. They knew that even if they tried, they couldn't measure up. They wouldn't be on your level. And you should know that already because that's pretty much what happened in the beginning, if you look back and remember. They tried that already. They tried to work with you. They tried to cooperate. But they just couldn't measure up. They couldn't do it like you do. And that is why they had no choice but to turn against you. They had no other option. What else were they going to do when they knew that they're not good enough for you? And I know I understand this must be very difficult for some of you to believe because you've been brainwashed for such a long time into doubting yourself and your own qualities and abilities. But this is the reality of it. This is why they do what they do. It's because they know they're not good enough for you. So it's like against to a point in the relationship where they don't even want you to be you because you being you automatically puts them at a disadvantage because you're greater than them. And they come around you only because they want your power and energy for themselves because they can't generate that from within. They have no inner sense of value. So they've got to get that from you. And that's all they're really trying to do when they come around you is manipulate you and leave you holding on to a possible future with them. Well, they're extracted as much fuel, supply and resources from you as they possibly can. As I said, it's like the analogy I've said a few times before where it's like a mouse coming out of a hole in the wall. It grabs a bit of cheese and then it takes it back to the hole where it belongs because it knows where it belongs. It knows it does not belong with you. It knows it is not on your level. It knows that you're not going to amount to anything as long as they're around. And that's where they come in and they've got to hurry it up as quick as possible, get as much as they can from you in the shortest amount of time before the entire thing goes under and it's all over because they already know that with them in it, it's not going to last long because they know that all they do is destroy. They know they're not capable of sustaining anything. And yet anything they get into, they've always got to have the authoritative position even though they have no past accomplishments or success in anything. If you could see the history of their lives, all you would see is a string of failed relationships. They've just destroyed one person's life after another. They've never improved anyone's lives. And because of all of that experience, they already know that it's going to be the exact same thing with you. They know they're going to ruin you. They're going to destroy your life. So they're just coming in and trying to get as much as they can from you in the shortest amount of time and then they're out of there. They jump ship because they already know that it's going down. They know that it's not going anywhere with them in it. And yet many of you, when they turn against you, when they do all of these hurtful things to you, you look at yourself as the empath that you are, you self-loathe. You question yourself, you question your abilities. You start to feel like you're not good enough. And that's just it. However you feel when you're around a narcissist, that's exactly how they feel. They're projecting their feelings onto you. They disown of these parts of themselves that they don't like. And then they assign them to their target. So you're feeling like you're not good enough. And then because they disown that onto you, it allows them to elevate themselves at your expense. But those feelings, those emotions, they do not belong to you. Remember how confident and enthusiastic you felt before you got involved with them. You were so full of life and energy until they gained access into your life. You were on a mission. You were killing it. You were doing well. But they came in with that energy that belongs to them of how they feel like they're not good enough. They feel inadequate. And they came and dumped that onto you when that doesn't belong to you. That has nothing to do with who you actually are. That's all them. You're alright. You're fine. You always were. Just remember the person that you were before you got involved with them. You were just around the wrong person. If you were never around them, things would have been fine for you. And this is the problem. I mean, it's one thing to be around someone who feels inadequate. They feel like they're not good enough. It's one thing to be around someone like that. I mean, at least for that type of person, you can still pull them up. You can make them better. The real problem is with narcissists is that, yes, they feel inadequate. They feel completely worthless and insignificant. They have no inner sense of value, but what makes it so much worse is the fact that they are in denial and they want to pull other people into their delusion. That's what causes everything to go to shit because you're caught up in this lie, this fantasy where there's something else, where there's something that they're not. And of course, yes, that is a lie. It is a fantasy, a delusion. So despite what they say, despite what they display to you, there's only one way that's going to go. It's not going to go well because it is a delusion. And at some point, reality is going to sink in for the both of you. Everything's going to go to ruin because they're not anything. They lie to you and they lie to themselves. And that's how things were fine for you before you got involved with them. And then as soon as they've gained access to your life, it just takes a downward spiral. Everything deteriorates. It becomes progressively worse. It never gets better with a narcissist. And the reason why is because they are in denial. They have a false self. It's all an illusion, a shared fantasy, and they pull you into it. If it was a genuine person who maybe lacks confidence, maybe they've got a few things they could work on. Somewhere like that, it wouldn't be so bad because at least then they're not in denial. You can work with them. Things can get better. What makes it so damaging and destructive is the fact that they are in denial. And here's an example. It's like driving a car. You may have someone who's just learning to drive. Yes, they may lack confidence. They haven't had enough practice or experience. Maybe they can work on their driving ability. Somewhere like that, they're not in denial. They accept it. Yes, you can teach them how to improve and things will get better. The problem with narcissists is the fact that they are in denial. So they are overconfident. They believe that they are that already. They're experts. They're professionals at everything. Even though they've never done the work, they haven't got any experience. They don't have the skills. So they're going to jump in a car. And they may never have driven a car before. They've got no experience. They've never passed their test. They haven't got a license. What do you think is going to happen? Of course, they're going to crash the car. And a typical narcissist, when they do something wrong, what do they do? They shift the blame onto someone else. So someone else takes the blame. And then the narcissist continues in their car on their journey. Just repeating the same mistakes again and again, blaming everyone else. Causing destruction wherever they go. That's exactly what it's like. That's exactly what they do. And this is why when you get involved with them, they just destroy everything. And at the end of it, they blame you, the victim. And then they go off and they do the same thing again to someone else. And they never improve. They never get better. They never develop the abilities. They now have the authentic experience. They're just going about with this false character. Who is everything that it needs to be already, even though it's a delusion, a fantasy. They're not good enough. And they know they're not good enough. And they don't want to do the work. They can't do the work. They have a void. They have a false character and they have no true self. So there's nothing that they can do to be better. And that's why they rely on their manipulation and the illusion so strongly. Because that's literally all that they've got. They have nothing else. They hold on to that for their lives. And sometimes if you threaten it, you threaten to expose them, they may even threaten to take their own lives. Because that's literally all they've got. They've got nothing else. But this is it. You won't believe this about the narcissist, but it's true. They know they're not good enough for you. That's the whole point of the false character, the illusion. That's why they manipulate and gaslight you. That's why they lie and future fake. That's why they eventually devalue you and turn against you. It's why they discard you. It's why they triangle you with someone else. It's why they start a smear campaign against you and try to punish you. Because of everything that you saw wrong with them, even though you may have never openly acknowledged it or confronted them on it, that's why they do all of the hurtful things that they do to you. That's why. If you're finding this video helpful so far, please hit that thumbs up button down below. It will take you two seconds and it will be very helpful to getting this message out there so that other survivors will see it as well. Now we're going to do a short Q&A. I've given you a lot of information in this video. So let me know if you have any questions down below in the live chat. I will read it out and respond to it. For those of you who don't know, I've been doing this, making videos for five and a half years, researching narcissistic personality disorder, almost every day for six years. So I have a lot of experience in this field. It's something I am very passionate about. I've devoted my life to this and I've coached hundreds of clients. So any questions that you have, let me know down below in the live chat and I will read it out and respond to it and give a detailed answer. Moonglitter says, well, or they will try and talk a person into suicide. Horrible. Yes, they will. They will try to nudge you to suicide if you threaten the false character and the illusion because to them, that's like life or death. When they feel like the illusion is falling apart, in order to protect and defend it, the false reality, they would rather just destroy you completely and even try to get you to kill yourself because then at least it eliminates the threat. Remember everything is about sustaining the false character and the illusion at all costs. That's all they're concerned about. Paula Freeman asks, everything you said was perfectly right. Do they ever change? In most cases, no. Of course, there are very rare situations where narcissists do develop full awareness of their behaviors and how it's wrong and they do make some positive changes. However, that requires intensive therapy for the rest of their lives. From what we know so far, this disorder cannot be cured. That may change with time, but right now, that's what we know. I know there's a lot of trolls in the live chat, but don't worry, there will be a moderator, hopefully for the next live video. Try to remove all of the distractions and then we can focus on the message. St. B.P. God asks, why narcissists call you narcissistic after treating you badly? Yeah, they will do that because as I said, they're trying to disown these parts of themselves that they don't like and assign them to you. Everything they do to their victims, they use a false character for that which they are detached from. So all they have is all of these false characters which they use for different people and they're not attached to any of them. So they can do these things to you and then at the end, they shift the blame onto you. They falsely accuse you as a way of disowning the behaviors that go along with a particular false character to deflect the blame and then they won't be held accountable and they're trying to deflect the shame but they are shame-based people so that doesn't go away. But yeah, I know this message will be very helpful for many of you after you've been brainwashed for such a long time. You've lost confidence in yourself and I can tell you that this is why I do what I do. Many of you have so much potential. You could bring so much value to this world and yet you've been kept down for such a long time. You need to know that it's not you. You need to know that you are good enough and in fact they did this to you because they know they're not enough for you. That's why. Otherwise, things could have been fine. You could have been on good terms with them. It's because they felt threatened by you. They believed that you are superior to them and that's what the problem was. Despite anything else they may say to you, it's just a cover-up. It's just to protect the illusion. They use false narratives but it never lines up with their behaviors and what they're doing to you. It never justifies their actions. And in fact it's like the very things they're accusing you of, that's exactly what they've been doing to you. Yes, everything they do. It's because they feel inadequate and it's to deflect their shame. That is the reason and knowing this information now it should help you. It should boost your confidence in yourself and I would recommend watching this video several times. To really drill it inside your head so that you realize and accept it. Because I'm telling you that this is the truth. But of course we must continue to work on ourselves as well. We must work on our qualities and abilities. Because for us it has to be real. There's no false characters for us. We actually have to do the work and then the confidence will come with that. And then of course we will experience success. And that's what I want for all of you. I want you all to be successful in life and in your relationships as well. And if you need more support you can book a one-on-one coaching session with me. You can go to my website www.anarchsurvivor.co.uk and you can book a session with me on there. Please give this video a thumbs up down below. It will help to get this message out there so that other survivors will see it and benefit from this information. And if you'd like to donate you can donate by giving this video a super thanks in the comment section or you can donate through the live chat or you can also go to my PayPal it is PayPal.me.com And don't forget to hit the subscribe button and click all notifications so that you will be notified when I upload a new video. And you can also follow me on Instagram it is www.anarchsurvivor.co.uk I have new pictures and videos of my travels here in the Philippines that I upload every day on there. So that's it for this message I'd just like to thank you all for joining me. I do appreciate your warm I appreciate your support and as always I look forward to speaking with you in another live video very soon.