the opening joke is based off of a jim gaffigan joke (i apologize i meant to acredit him) thank you for you criticism. once again i apologize, EVERYTHING else is original
lyrics below "beat" and lyrics by bo burnham
Yo i dont got bros, dont hang on the streets i dont beat my hos, i only beat my meat. Dont womanize cause you no its true that when you look in thier eyes you see thier people too Mother effin suffrage! You know im a gangsta, you know i do coke, but i had to go to diet, cause it burnt my throat. Ive been doin drive-bys all of my life, cept the bullets are newspapers, the car is my bike.
3.14 apple pi, i whip, clean it off, and stick it in her eye. and by "it" i mean contact lense 3.14 apple pi, I got rhymes and flows that make hitler cry. George bush wont he jsut yell and rant but hes a presiDONT who ameriCANT
I spit gangsta hymns, cause i'm a gangsta straight, I think of 20 inch rims when i masterbate. We're gonna be late, theres no time to waste, cause the girls that i date, have a particular taste. the taste of my weiner! (snap)
3.14 apple pi why was i born white no one quite knows why, Gansgsta sell their rocks, ive got a collection You couldnt get a rise out of a yeast infection.
I'm a lyrical heretic, but i'll make you laugh hit with you rhetoric, then i'll cut you in half. dont need to be a clown, i dont need to be nice, How bout you sit down, and i serve you slice...
of my 3.14 apple pi my voice is so smokey itll make you high... Heres a confession its all about me, Heres my impression of a broken jet ski.
Here come the puns. All yo little thugs wanna mess me with me? know that ive been doin drugs since the age of 3. I took my ceral, stabbed it open with a knife. Snorted that shit and i got high on Life. A guy asked me for change, saying my mind was too dense. I said you wont make cents if you dont make sense. big finale...
you know i flow and show it, you know that bo know it, Youre lawn i'll mow it and grow it cause he's a sho' poet. Yo my rims be spinning i winning, like adam i be sinning. Potato skinnnin and knittin and separate those linens. And in my eyes you see flies, and though you people tries Just to disguise all your lies, but baby i be wise. you know i did it and shit it you brothers couldnt hit it, Then you try to ride it, too late! i already spit it.