 I have a crazy story to tell you. I love it. Do you know that we're connected in a unique way? How? Through Jared. But how are we connected? Hi, lovers and friends, you are about to watch a snippet of a conversation I had with Kima where she talked about being or about to turn 30, still being single and not being stressed at all. This was a small part of the conversation I thought was pretty interesting and titillating, but it definitely doesn't reflect the larger conversation. It was more about the realities of her dating life and the realities of her mentality that's allowing her to approach her dating life with lightness and ease, despite the fact that it hasn't been that successful and that she continues to have struggles within it. So please go to Lovers and Friends, the YouTube channel, and watch that full video. Also, if you haven't already, subscribe over there. We have videos coming out weekly, more regularly than we do on this channel and I hope you'll enjoy it. That's all. This is the story that's so great about you and Jared. You guys didn't date very long. I don't even know if that was dating. Jared went on a date with you and had to go to a check and stop to get an advance on his paycheck in order to pay for the date with you and his perception of you was like, I have to take her to a certain kind of place because of who she is. That was outside of his means. And so I always tell that story because I think it's the funniest thing because he ended up ordering the lobster pizza at this date and he was crushed him because he was like, now I won't eat groceries. No, this is so wrong. It's like, I guess this is special because I guess I'm the only one that's connected in the way that you'll have on the show, right? Well, probably not. He's from LA. Oh, okay. So he knows a lot of people, but oh, so he's dated other people on your show? No, not that I know of, maybe. I'm sure there's like, I see people different. There's always somebody he's dated. I didn't even think about it that first time we were supposed to have the podcast. And then we started talking about it like a few weeks ago and I was like, wait, I was like, her husband or her boyfriend or I didn't know what the statue was yet. And I was like, wait, I think that we might have like made out once or something. That's amazing. It doesn't matter how much we talk about what we're going to talk about. People are always like, what the fuck are you going to say when we start? Which one did we choose? All right, you've been going on a lot of devil dates. Expand on that for me. Yeah, so I just turned 29 and during that time I got out of a two and a half year relationship and I had gone out for my birthday and I had what you would call an ego death where I kind of just let go of an old self and an old way of thinking and I had this rebirth. So I did Molly on my birthday first time. I thought you were going to say ayahuasca for sure. Oh no, I've definitely asked about that but I heard that's a whole nother level. But I tried this out. I'm hearing all these great stories. All these different things are happening to people. So I'm like, okay, let me try it out. I, we ended up doing a dinner and we went out to the club. My mom came. It was like the night before. So that midnight, you know, when you turn the clock's changed. And it was the most incredible experience in my life. I felt like I was living or floating outside my body and the way that I was able to feel and connect to things was on such a different level and the way that I saw things was so different. And the level of joy that I was able to hit and the extensive that intensity of just joy and happiness and just solitude, it changed me. So ever since that day, I just kept developing new habits and new ways of thinking and new perspectives. So we broke up. Because of that experience? No, no, no. We broke up because I think we were just going in two different directions. The introduction to the relationship wasn't, you know, we were just having sex. It was kind of like a night thing, you know, and then we developed the feelings. And so we tried to make it work. And this was the first relationship where I initiated it. I reached out to him. And so I wanted to try something new this time around to see if I can get a different experience. And I also learned the value of time and time is of essence. So I stopped waiting for men to come to me because I felt like, if I want something, I need to go get it. And I'm going to miss out on opportunities in life if I keep waiting, especially a man to do something the way I want them to do it. So we initiate, I initiated it. It was fun. It was exciting. The sex was good. We created a best friend, you know, relationship. And then it just kind of went downhill from there. I started to really elevate and I started transitioning my business. Like, as you know, I was a fitness guru, like really intense. I've been in Instagram since 2010. Just doing the damn thing. Just fitness, fitness, doing boot camps, training everyone. And that was all I did every day. And I transitioned. Now I'm getting into beauty and fashion. So the workload became heavier and towards the end of our relationship, I lost a lot of my team. So I had a lot of weight and a lot of pressure on my plate. And so he had to kind of help me out. And maybe that wasn't the right time. The point in his life that he was willing to sacrifice that for himself and his own time for me. So long story short, he, I'm building a house and he didn't support the things that I did because he didn't have confidence. He was very insecure. He didn't feel worthy of the things that I was doing. And I really did, this is something I probably would have never done, or have never done, is take care of a man like I did with him. And we call it the build a boy workshop where every time I got in a relationship, I was always thinking I was going to create this man that I wanted. And it never turned out that way. It always changed. I always got worse towards the end. So I realized we were going in two different directions and we were ready for two different things. And he wasn't deserving of my love because I was evolving and elevating at such a fast pace. And I felt like he couldn't keep up. I think the things he wanted and realized he wanted was not what I wanted. And I want to work. I love to work. I really enjoyed my life. It's a lifestyle. It's not a job. It's way too fun and I'm surrounded by incredible people. So we just slowly started to separate. We didn't grow, we started to stop growing together. When we travel, we'd argue. It was like this, you know, when you get to that point in a relationship, it's a nonstop argument and every little thing. So eventually I realized he didn't appreciate me. He didn't see the value in me and what I was offering or had, you know, was bringing to the table for him. And timing is everything. It just didn't work out. And we both agree that this isn't gonna serve either of us. So I was scared, but I wrote it to the wheels fell off like I normally do, because I'm very committed and very loyal. But I gave up on that idea and I was like, you know what, time is now, time is of essence and I'm gonna be 30 soon. Like I don't have time to wait around now. I need to make decisions that are gonna serve me now and in my future.