 What the narcissist thinks about no contact? You go no contact with a narcissist because they're not treating you in the way that you would like. They don't appreciate you, they don't respect you and you don't want to tolerate their behaviour anymore. The narcissist is fully aware that you are not satisfied with a relationship. They know what they have to do to keep you happy. They are fully aware of what they are not doing. They just don't care. It's never reciprocal with a narcissist. It's always one person making all of the effort while they deny or minimise everything that you're doing because they want to have the advantage. They want to be in a favourable or superior position. They know exactly what they're doing. They know that what they're doing is wrong. They know that they're not giving anything to you. They are intentionally giving you as little as possible. So they already know why you're not happy. They already know why you want to leave because they're not doing anything for you. They're not doing anything that might make you want to stick around. They understand that you would see a more favourable situation without them. They understand that it would be better for you because they're not bringing anything to the table. They're not doing anything that would benefit you or improve your life in any way. When you go no contact with the narcissist, they're not just going to come back and do whatever they think you want them to do. They're not going to change and be everything you want them to be. They have to be in the superior position. They have to be in a position of influence and authority. So it has to be on their terms. It has to be under their conditions. They're not going to come back and say that life has been difficult without you. They're not going to tell you that they miss you because then they would be displaying weakness of vulnerability. They have to act like everything's okay. They have to act like they're so much happier without you as though you're the one who needs them because otherwise you would have the advantage. You would be in the superior position and you would have the power to influence and direct their behaviour and the course of events. When they hoover you with an apology, it's usually just to feed their ego. They want to see if you're still willing to talk to them even after the amount of time they spent not talking to you. It makes them feel special. It makes them feel like there's something significant. It makes them feel like they're still relevant in your life. When you go no contact with the narcissist, they see it as though you're trying to punish them. They see it as a game. It becomes a game where they try to continue with their lives as normal despite the difficult situation. They try to survive the difficult period without suffering any effects or consequences. They see it as though since you're refusing to contact them, they're going to hold out on you and refuse to give you whatever they think you want. They see it as though you can't do any better than them. At some point you're going to want to come back before they feel like wanting to come back to you. It's all a game. They don't take no contact seriously. They see it as though you're just wasting time. In their minds you're wrapped around their finger. They believe they have control, power and influence over you. They believe that they can easily persuade you to do what they want you to do. So in their minds you're just wasting time. You're just playing a game with them and they have to punish you for playing a game with them. They see it as though you're just going no contact to prove something to them to get back at them. So they will just show you that they don't care to make you feel like you're not worth anything to them, which is partially true. They are only capable of using you. But once you've decided to go no contact, that is when they will show you who they really are and how much they really didn't care. Up until now they were playing a role. They were showing you whatever they thought you wanted to see, to get what they wanted from you. But once you take that away from them, that's when you will see how little regard they have for you. That's when you will see that they never cared. Because that's just what happens when you decide to stand up for yourself. But they won't ever admit what they're doing or why they're doing it. They leave it open to interpretation for a reason. Because deep down even they don't know why. When they don't give you reasons for their behavior. When they don't give you closure. They can just do whatever they want without having to explain anything. They can disappear and come back whenever they like. That's why they don't like to talk about it. Because they already know that there is no explanation that would justify their behavior. It's all based on self driven motives. And when they come back they can just act like they left you. They can act like you weren't treating them right. Because in their minds they were treated unfairly. The no contact was not justified or authorised. And there is something wrong with you. For not recognising how perfect they are. Because that's how they have to see themselves. They see it as though you just didn't appreciate them. Even though they already know they were not giving you anything. They see it as though you're going to miss them more than they're going to miss you. They've seen it enough times before where they've damaged a person to the point where they can't just move on their own. And they will be likely to return back to the narcissist. Because it's not so easy to repair the damage that these narcissists do to people. They just see it as though if they can't beat them they should join them. Even though they do not approve of or agree with what they do. They can't do without them. So they try to cooperate with them. And the narcissist lacks awareness of the damaging effects that their behaviour is having on their source of supply. Because they're self-absorbed and they lack empathy. They don't even think about how their source is now damaged psychologically. After the endless manipulation and mind games that they have endured. But when the narcissist is finally forced to accept that they're victim. Although they may never recover from the damage. Has managed to escape. The narcissist can still continue with their narrative of how they were the victims. They will say that they didn't do anything to you. You didn't appreciate them. Which then allows them to move on to the next situation unharmed with their next victim. Because for them to even reflect on what they did to their victim. Would be traumatic in itself. It would be like putting a mirror in front of them and showing them who they really are. Which is why they have to belittle your no contact. They have to see it as though it's just a game. They have to dismiss it as unimportant. And see it as though you're the one missing out on the perfection of everything that they think they are. Thank you for watching. I hope this video wears out with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos. Check out the new Narc Survival website at www.narcsurvivor.uk where you can read my blog posts, book coaching sessions and join our support forum. If you would like to donate, my PayPal link is in the video description. Coaching queries you can email me at coaching.narcsurvivor.uk. Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.