 Okay, so we was going to talk today just briefly about how to navigate living in the United States, being Muslim and the holiday season, right? Which is what we're in right now. In a few days it'll be Christmas. What are we going to do? For a lot of us, a lot of us who are families or some of our families. Some, for some people, they may be the only Muslim in their family. And I always tell brothers and sisters, if you're the only Muslim in your family, get married and have kids. There's going to be a lot of y'all. You're going to tilt the balance. If it's just you, it's going to be a problem. It's like you versus the world. You start having kids. They're going to be on their daddy and their mama's side. They're going to be like, Granny, you tripping every year. And you know, over the years I don't mellow down a lot when it comes to holidays. I still, I never say Merry Christmas though, still to this day. I'm like, why would I say that? I don't have to say that. You know what I'm saying? It's almost like Wild Lake. Somebody says Merry Christmas to me. I'd be like Wild Lake. So Hadith of the Prophet, alayhi salam wa salam, where some Yahudis, they say some alaykum, some is like venom. So it's almost like you're saying salam, but you're being slick. They say some alaykum. And he just say Wild Lake. So whatever you're wishing on the week, back to you. That's old school. We was young. We would say back to you. That's like saying Wild Lake. So somebody says to me, Merry Christmas. I say you too. If you trying to, you know, you want something good for me. A lot of times, and this is what I, as I got older, I come to realize when people say these things, sometimes it's just they're saying it just culturally. They know it's the time of the year. They see you with your family. They say Caesar's greetings. Happy holidays. Merry Christmas to you, especially they see you with the little ones. Merry Christmas to you and the kids. I used to get offended. So what you talking about? Christmas is a pagan holiday. You know, like if you know the history of Christmas, you'll know that it doesn't really have nothing to do with the prophet, Issa, ladies salam, salam. It has to do with other things that were in the Roman lands when they was pagans and they Christianized those holidays. Right. So I know that. I'm pretty sure I know brother Malik know that. We came up saying wait, you know what I'm saying? Jeremiah 10. What's Jeremiah 10 talk about? Come on, man. They can't hear you. So he was talking about Jeremiah 10 verse four to six in the Bible. Can you hear me? It's not on. First of all, salam aleikum. How everybody doing? Yeah, but what are you speaking about? Because it was wintertime too. It was very cold. They kind of bored. Didn't have nothing to do. So Jeremiah 10 verse 46 talks about those that go into the woods and chop down trees and decorate it with silver and gold and pop them up. Called them evens. So it's like, it's paganism. So yeah, me and him grew up like that. I used to get offended too because even when somebody say happy birthday, I'd say happy born day. So that was like, that used to be our coupons, right? Christmastime come. We will quote Jeremiah 10 in the Bible. Wormy that owns who go cut down the tree and decorated with silver and gold and prop it up. They ain't nothing but heathens, right? That was, I guess we would say that to our family like, you're a heathens. I don't think that's like the best down would take me, right? Now that I'm older, my grandma, I mean, my mom, who's my kid's grandma, she'll say, send the kids up. I'm like, why you wanting to come up? It's like a week before Christmas. I'm not dumb. But see my mama though, what can I do? So I tell my daughter, I say, if she say, then she wants you to decorate the tree. Say you decorate the tree. And she repeats after you, la ilaha ilallah. Say, okay, granny, I'm gonna help you decorate the tree. But first you say la ilaha ilallah to me. That's a good trade off. No, I'm saying, I don't know what happens. The tree gets decorated. No, I'm saying, far as I'm concerned, I'm like, Hey, man, my mom just takes her high every Christmas. But the one thing a lot is what I'm saying is just to create a little bit of levity. One of the things that can be tense is because how do we navigate being the other, being in the minority and still having a sense of dignity about ourselves. It might be easy for me as an adult to be like, I don't need Christmas. I don't need Kwanzaa. I don't need all of that. I got a line as messenger. But with our kids, our kids, a lot of times it's like everybody having a good time but us. This whole religion just is about no. No, I can't do this. No, I can't do that. So as parents and older siblings, what do we do to help our families navigate the holiday season? And one of the main things that we can do, which in the past, my parents didn't do that well, my dad. For him, we fast Ramadan and then Ramadan was over. We didn't do a whole lot of celebrating because he was like that first generation of people practicing Islam. Before him, we thought Ramadan was in December every year. So he was in that first generation and started getting it right. But they didn't, you know, they was like, we don't fast, don't wake the kids up, make them all read the Holy Quran with some beauty. One of my main memories of being a kid is after Fajr sitting in a circle, all of the kids and my dad and my stepmom were sighting the Jews of Quran every day. Right? That was like big. But at the end of that, I didn't get like no toys. So then when Christmas will come, I'll be riding my friend bike. Yeah, I don't celebrate Christmas. Can I ride your bike? I don't celebrate Christmas. Do I use your skateboard? I don't celebrate Christmas. So it almost like you become an orphan for all holidays when you're Muslim. And so the way we can navigate this so it doesn't happen is that we have to big up the Muslim celebrations. So when the ease come, they got to be big. I know it's traditional and a lot of the Muslim world to eat is almost like a family gathering. You go to the prayer, you go visit family. And then you go maybe to the cemetery. That works when you're in a place that don't have Christmas. But when you come to United States, a lot of Muslims don't have families to visit. I mean, we got families to visit, but they're not Muslims. So they like, why are you coming over here on Thursday? Like, okay, we're going to make sure that this E is a big celebration. So we're going to rent our home. We're going to get toys for the kids. We're going to have those jumping houses. We're going to have food so that the kids look forward every year. They used to have, we used to have at our eat in Oakland, they had this guy, he was called the animal guy. I don't even know his real name. He come every year, he got all these snakes. And I remember my daughter running every year to see the animal guy. She's like 22 now. I remember when she was like 15. I said, you don't see the animal guy? She's like, man, he got the same stuff. But that stuff worked. Because it's like you only see it twice a year. But once she got old enough, she said, man, that's the same animal. Some of them don't die. He don't replace the couple of them. But in her mind, as a kid, she was looking for to having a good time. The main way that we navigate these things is by giving people an alternative. We can tell people Christmas tree is paganism. They don't care about that. They like, I care about the presents that's under that joint more than the tree itself. So we just say, hey, we give our presents too. And not just Muslim presents. I said, this is Juma. Y'all might have called it. But sometimes E come, you're gonna get the same Muslim stuff. I'm like, I want a new iPhone for E. I'm in one time, my wife, she said to me, she said, you want the new iPhone? I said, I'm really not. That was a long time ago. This is like the iPhone six. I've seen a commercial for iPhone 14. I called my wife. I was like, you know, E coming up. We like three months away, man, start putting it away. I don't want like the dick of bees no more. No, I'm saying I want the, the Egyptian months. I'm not saying all of that stuff is great. Like if you barely know me and you give me some Egyptian months, hundred long. But if you're my family, man, I'm gonna be like, dude, you paid $20. One of the things about navigating the holidays, we have to be less combative to our Christian brothers and sisters. Because they just trying to have a good time, man. They just trying to spend time with the family. This is their E and every people have their E's. So we're not trying to put our E on them. And they're not trying to put their E on us. They might give us a gift that I said, if you get, if you take this gift, that means you worship Jesus. That's not what they said. They're saying, you mean something in my life. You're a friend of mine. You are loved ones. I'm giving you this because I feel something for you. We can throw it back in their face. That's the Christmas stuff. And you worship shirt. But after we say all that, they still gonna worship Jesus if they Christian. The better way to open up dialogue with people is be nice to people. A lot of the holy craig, he says, you'll find closest to you and love are those who call themselves Christians. Imam As-Siyuti, Rahimahullah, he said, this ayah is talking about the Africans. He said, this ayah. Imam As-Siyuti never came to the United States. They didn't have a United States. Think about how many Africans that converted to Islam from Christianity in the United States. This is God telling us that we have a whole group of people that if we treat them good, they are already at the precipice. Well, I talked to Christians and not just African American ones. A lot of people who used to be Christian and they say, man, I would go to church and I just couldn't believe that Jesus was God. This is what they say. I hear people who not Muslims say that. Say, man, when I used to go to church, I just couldn't believe. Like the message was good. But when they would say that Jesus was God, it just, I just couldn't believe it. Has anybody else heard that? Anybody else heard Hamdullah? I don't want people to think I'm tripping. Now I'm saying, people say that. They're like, I used to go to church but I just couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it. That Jesus was God because he ain't. It goes against their fitra to believe that a man is God. But if we just fighting and arguing with them, they not going to listen to us either. A lot of times we should just take it easy, be nice to people, say things that are lawful. You say happy holidays. They don't know what you talking about. I say happy holiday. I mean E or Friday. They mean Christmas or Holika to each his own. Lakum dinakum waliya din. But that's better than me getting into an argument, getting into a fight. I know that the rituals that they have is steeped in paganism. But it's not Islam. So it don't matter. It don't matter if it was actually Jesus' birthday and it didn't have all of the other stuff. It's still it's not Islam. So for them, it's just a festive, most festive day of the year. And so Hamdullah, they can have that. Do we participate in it? If somebody gives me a gift, me personally, I take it, especially they got that new iPhone. I don't do like a law work bar. I'm not going to necessarily buy somebody a gift on Christmas. But if something like my mom, I buy her gifts all the time. So when Christmas comes around, she don't mind not getting nothing. But come to the thing tonight about the thing, maybe get them takes you how to say he don't bring both them wives though. No, I'm saying that we don't want no fights to break out in the prayer room, inshallah. So that's pretty much what I wanted to say. We got any questions about any questions about anything I said or comments or anything else? Sister Raheem. On Christmas, all day, every day, I said there is also, I heard in Haidih, and then in Haidih, is that not first of all, Islam? So the sister said that she's around Christians. Sister Raheem, old school says he know about all of the Muslim secrets and all, you know what I'm saying? But she said when she's giving gifts, she accepts them because she doesn't, she believes it's unislamic to offend the giver. And I know that the Prophet said, he said, give gifts and spread love, give gifts and spread love. So we want to be giving people and we want to accept gifts. There may be, and it's for everybody, it's going to be different. Some people are going to be like, look, man, I don't want to take no gift on Christmas because that's a bunch of shirts behind the gift. So if somebody, that's what they want to say, humbly love. Somebody else says, I want to take the gift because I don't want, I don't turn down so many gifts in my life from people, man, on Christmas. And it ain't not one person who I turn a gift down ever that became Muslim. So I'm not saying they didn't become Muslim because I didn't take the gift, but I know for a fact that that didn't help them become Muslim because none of them people will become Muslim. And I would go out my way sometimes to be polite. Oh, you know, I'm Muslim. This and this and that. They just like, dude, I'm trying to give you something because like I love for you. Ain't throwing it back in my face. You know what I'm saying? The only people who love Muslims are bosses because we worked all of the holidays. I seen a couple of hands. I think it was a brother's hand right there. And it was a sister. Don't ever think that. My daughter came to live with me last year. So this will be her first Christmas with no tree presents. However, she had for some money today and understood my credit card music or whatever. But as a parent, I brought her safety to that she's over there in the workshop. But as a parent, like, no, it's how do we, I guess, dive in for next year? Because I have a conversation with my text. I said, this is affecting me. And I think you mentioned earlier, she was not Muslim. Okay, so we came up with the name for it. So, you know, instead of saying Merry Christmas, she says, Merry Christmas. She says, we came up with the name. Yeah, so she calls, we call it American holiday. And today she's going to her mom's house to visit and she's exposed to all that. How do I navigate it for next year? Because again, like you as a parent, you know, like I catch myself like a force on her. But then I fall back and like she was her earlier. And then she doesn't go here and there. She's like, go here and there. Okay, that's cool. But I'm only Muslim in my family, so I see it. Like they took my parents years to accept it. But now, like my dad, they thought that I need no meat. So for long years, last five years, seven years, they've been making me grills with no meat. And one day I went down like, I like chicken too. And then we see the difference that changes life. So now I think I got more of a place, but how do I navigate it for next year? So I mean, I think it's more like a long plan. Like I think what you're saying, like when it comes to our children, one of my parents was Muslim, one of my parents wasn't. So I knew how to get over, you know, all of my non Muslim relatives around Christmas. And I knew that they would hook me up. You know what I'm saying? It wasn't that I was saying, but I accept that lifestyle. And my mom told me that one time, my mom, she took my nephew to church. This was years ago. So I get upset. I'm like, man, what you tell you in church for Muslims got to give that stuff up. She was like, I always took you to church. It ain't work on you. And so that made me mellow out a little bit. Like, you know, definitely your daughter, she's in a space where everybody who she knows, they're celebrating. So, you know, if she, at one point in her life, every human being, no matter who we are, we don't have to make a decision on how we want to live our life. You want to dedicate our life to follow in our line as messenger, or do we want to do something else? InshaAllah, your daughter, she got many years to make that decision. The best things you can do is just be a good loving father, better have some space. You could be real strict on folks. That strict stuff in America don't work because they could call CPS. We cover mother countries, man. You do whatever you want with the kids. But in America, kids don't call child abuse. Be like, this, my dad ain't letting me celebrate Christmas. It's going to be a whole thing. They're going to be like, and he's Muslim. He's going to be like on the news. You know what I'm saying? So I will just take my time. I would let her know I don't celebrate Christmas. So if I give you something, it ain't got nothing to do with it being Christmas. You know what I'm saying? Now, if your mama give you something, she celebrates Christmas. If you want to take it as a Christmas gift, or just take it as this is something from your mama, you know what I'm saying? We had a sister over here, I think. I have a question. She said, what's the fine line between participating in the holiday? She said, what's the fine line between participating? I mean, so it is a fine line. Most of the time, we cross over real easy. It depends on if they got mac and cheese at the house. You're like, wait a minute, they going to have mac and cheese and collard greens? I'm going over. You know what I'm saying? And then it's just you really, so like me, my mom, she stays upstairs. We stay in a duplex. Me and my family stay on the bottom. Her, my youngest sister, they stay in the top apartment, right? So Christmas time, actually this Christmas ain't really been too much because my sister, she's busy with somebody else. So it's just really my mom and all of the Muslims. You know what I'm saying? But when you're, when you have family, so I think it's too thin, if you don't have any non-Muslim family, then the people who you come in contact with, it's just like co-workers, friends, neighbors. There's probably like, if you over there pouring the egg, you're like, what am I even doing over here? Right? But if you got non-Muslim, most of your intimate family members are non-Muslim, it's going to be hard for you to never show up for nothing. You know what I'm saying? So one dozen, he was telling me, I go over, I tell them, don't put no pork on the plate. And when they bow their head, and when they say in the name of Jesus, I say a stunt for a lot. And other than that, we good. So that, I'm doing love. Some people say, I'm not even going to enter the house. I'm not going to do nothing. I'm not going to do anything. If you can hold that line, humbly love. But for each person, they got to do with what they're comfortable with. I know like, Iman Malik, for the Malikis, he has a hard line on holidays. He's like, if you cut a watermelon on a pagan holiday, it's like sacrificing a pig. That's his line. But he lived in Medina. Why would you be doing some pagan holidays in Medina? Ain't even no pagans there. We don't live there. We live in the United States. So I took Iman Malik's statement, and I ran with him. My family still be petrified to tell me it's a birthday. They'd be like, don't tell Sonny how it is your birthday. I'm real mellow on birthdays now, because I'm older. But back in the day, I was hardcore, you know what I'm saying? It didn't get me that much as far as like, it just kind of messed up some of the relationships I had. And then when I got older, I had to try to mend those fences. So the best way to navigate a holiday is do what you're comfortable with. Don't do anything in a shirt. So if you buy your head and they say Jesus, say a stock for a lot, or better yet, say, can I lead the prayer? Never just lead the prayer. And then say sort of the Fatiha and Arabic. They're going to be like, oh, that was beautiful. Hamdullah, we got any other questions? Yes. So my question is a little bit similar to the story we just asked. So for people who are in the Western environment who are surrounded by Christmas movies and holiday work parties, and you know, just all things that are like Christmas related, right? So where do you draw the line as to what is principle and what is allowed for us to do and what is not? I mean, so pretty much whether it's Christmas or anything else, anything that's not allowed any other time of the year, like alcohol consumption, or being around people drinking alcohol, that's something that's not allowed, Islamically. So they want to invite us to a party, but it's going to be a bunch of alcohol and drinking. And it's the job to be like, well, I can't make it. You know what I'm saying? If it's just going to be a lot of singing and, you know, like a lot of times they'll try to say that it's not really a Christmas party, it's a holiday party. So if you want to go and just show up, spend a little bit of time and then kind of kick rocks, but if they can want you to do anything that's not lawful to do, then just don't do it. So if it's like, if it's going to be at their meeting at a bar at plenty of times of jobs, I told people, I don't meet at bars. Like we're going to meet, I can't make it to the bar because I don't go to bar. And then they'd be like, but I'm too long on the liquor store and say he didn't get the memo. But anything is unlawful. So it's like any food will be unlawful for you any other time of the year. The holidays are still unlawful. So we just got to say, whatever I do the rest of the year, I'm going to do on Christmas because Christmas ain't a special day for us as Muslims. Now, if you want to fast on Christmas, there's a difference of opinion. But some of the Ulema said you can fast on any non-Islamic holiday. You fast. So that's way for you to be like, I'm not participating. But I think the main thing is what am I supposed to do at the job? I'm at the job. It's Christmas time. We can relax a little bit. People are going to say, you know, Merry Christmas. Happy New Year. Happy Hanukkah. We just say, and you too, whatever you're wishing, you're wishing good things on me back to you. If you're wishing bad things on me back to you. You know what I'm saying? And then that's just kind of how we roll. If somebody, you know, they'll do the hidden Santa or something, what that thing is called, what they do, like everybody got to pick. I always tell people I don't participate in that. And then they'd be like, but we need one more person for the gift. I'd be like, I'm not participating in it. But if they give me a gift, I'm keeping that joint. Or I remember one time I got some lobster sauce. It's secret Santa. That's what it's called. So I said, okay, I'm gonna put some lobster sauce up in there. Y'all know what lobster sauce is? I don't do a lot. It's like a spice. It's big in a Chinese restaurant. Let me get the on the east coast. Let me get the fried rice with the lobster sauce. You get a big old thing of lobster sauce. I don't know if I want it. No, I'm saying. So is it really a gift? No. I think I've seen somebody over here. Why are you so land? So I listen from one of the easiest one. So when Marima was around, he bought food from Issa. So it was, it was under the dead tree. And after getting part of the issa, she was feeling very weak. And she, she ate them from the dead stream. So in, in Arab, so dead stream, you know, give stress in some. So, but Christmas is celebrated in Dishon. So my question is, go ahead and how Christmas is starting in Dishon. So, so he's asking, and I said a little bit about this in Juma, right? So the whole, when you look at the Holy Quran and it talks about the birth of Jesus, alayhi s-salatu wa s-salam, say, okay, well, it was these dates was blooming, dates blooming in summertime, how we get December 25th. And Malai, December 25th is about some pagan sun god, misra, something like that. He was born on this day and it goes all the way up until January 1st. So the date, the original date was a pagan holiday before they became Christian. And then they Christianized all those days. So Esther, when we get the word Easter, Esther is the god of fertility, right? That's why when they celebrate Easter, it's about eggs, which is a sign of fertility, and bunny rabbits, it's a sign of fertility, right? One guy saying Christianity is the only religion where they need mascots for the holiday. However, because we follow the lunar calendar, we know that whatever day Jesus was born on alayhi s-salatu wa s-salam, it's going to travel. So every 33 years is going to end up in the same place, roughly every 33 years, right? So which means it flows through the whole year. So some points of the year, Jesus was born in December because whatever day he was born, it wasn't on the solar calendar, it was on the lunar calendar. Just like on Ramadan days, some months of the year, some times of the year, Ramadan falls in December. It's not always in December though. So and for most Christians, they don't really care about all that. Like you can tell them about the paganism, this, the Yul law, the Yul is the will for the sun, the cross and the sun and the equator, they don't care about none of that. They just want to have good times with their family, right? So we, okay, we want to have good times with our family on our days. I don't want nobody to come trying to, well, this day was this, this day was that. I ain't trying to hear all that. This is my holiday. And the prophecy, one time, Abu Bakr, this is a beautiful hadith. He's talking about them. The Prophet Muhammad, one of his most intimate spaces. So Abu Bakr came into his house and the prophecy was facing the wall. And Aisha and a girl were sitting on the bed. They were singing and Abu Bakr, he got upset. You know, most of the men is about music. It's a long tradition to do a singing in front of the Prophet Muhammad, alayhi salat wa salam. And the Prophet, he turned around and he said, every people have their Eids. And these are the days of our Eid, meaning we should celebrate it. We should be singing. We should be jovial. We should have a good time.