 Hi guys, welcome to vlog week vlog week didn't happen because I got sick. So sorry guys today is Dom's last day in Texas She comes back in two weeks Right. Yeah It's sick Sickening and also I'm having gnarly cramps right now. We're in line at Starbucks. It's Monday morning. It's almost 10 a.m. I never start my day this late, but I was so shocked. I Didn't get out of bed till like 845 It was horrible. Today's not Dom's last day here though. I just have so much cleaning to do and like We're recording an episode Thank you. Um, if I if we're in the right mood for it. No, what are you talking about? I don't know if I'm gonna get in that moon. Will you help me clean? Yeah, it's time for one hour. Yeah, and we go in Yeah Okay, but when I get home, I need to like shower to get in like the Right heads you shower before you clean Well, also, I'm just like Well, I'm sorry. I just have a miniature sore throat From screaming all weekend long. Okay guys So I just want you guys also know that I'm sorry But duty does call in Los Angeles What does that? Tom like wants to cry. I do I do I'm not happy about this Thank you. Okay, that is not what I was not what I was expecting at all. We might have to come back I Never get this drink ice and I always say no whip and I just forget that they put whip on ice drinks I've never seen a whipped ice drink. No one do it all the time Literally if I no one would take me serious right now. No, like if we showed up somewhere Everyone would literally these drinks. They're yeah, they'd be like are you guys 12? Yeah, let's do taste test We'd be like first time at Starbucks. Let's do taste test on me guys. I'm wearing bread-winning house life birch. Oh, yeah guys we just had the best weekend and I Slaps collectively probably 12 hours Yeah And 12 of those hours was last night. Just yeah, and all of which was Saturday night No, it tastes fine. Like I just I'm not used to drinking like really like sugary drinks, this is the holiday season back like I'm trying to get back into my career my career Like we just needed something to make us happy. Yeah, I'm not happy and like I needed I thought this would make me happy these lids like grow up That is so funny That is so true like a dome lid on your drink grow up. You like literally Grow up. Yeah Yeah, so today I'm cleaning I did a whole vlog Dominar was through your court and episode Tonight we're going to dinner with friends because Dom's leaving for two weeks. We're being a little bit dramatic And yeah Yeah, should I house it for you while you're gone in New York? Yeah, if you want party at my house actually please do I need someone to wash the dogs Okay, um, I'll look out for lights today. Okay, that would actually be very helpful It's gonna be be a bad doggy dog You can make funny videos. Oh, it'll be great Also guys Dom and I for December January. I'm going to New York twice and Dom's going once but like for like two or three weeks and I Go then I leave she goes then she leaves then I go so so who plans that out you She played that out without sorry. I'm just so popular these days. I just have like so many jokes with all my friends They're just so popular. So yeah, okay. Well, don't worry about me cuz I got some trips planned to Yes, I have some trips that I have planned So don't worry What trips I'm going to New York I would have you know for about three weeks, and then you're going to Dallas and then I'm going back to Dallas and then to LA And then it's my birthday Yes, we need to look into oh we should you should I can't I can't have it out The P and you love attention and you love but not like that. Like I don't like after I We went no one is gonna give you a laugh We went like that and we saw how to give her a lap dance on stage and he She fell off the chair if that humiliation happens to me I'll never I've seen that every time I go there and that's normally what happens It was just because I am gonna tell you right now. I don't really care because I'm not gonna die like that What if I call my certain friend and he's going to give you a lap dance Who's your certain friend and your crush right now? What if he comes in and then he's the one he gives you a lap dance? I'm confused my Oh No I'll perform for him No No, oh my gosh, that's scary She's like but that's so scary. Don't invite him I'm like, what are you doing that week? Oh my god? No idea Wait, no because if that happens like I'm I promise you I've been so many times. They don't normally But I don't want to have to sit on the piano. They make all those weird box jokes. Like it's just Oh, okay. Well, they normally don't do that. But you're right. I get that. I have never seen that before there I have honestly. That's a fair. That's fair. I haven't the first time You can put my phone under there Okay, I'm gonna try my drink Okay, I can't do it myself. Seriously. Oh No, look, I hate myself. I hate my life. I hate everything about it We're not eating out on camera I'm not You also can't hear me eat because I've learned to eat silently good being friends with Kenzie. She hates when people eat No, no, it's not that it's no like you literally when she's it's not anyone chewing It's if you like chew obnoxiously you never chewed obnoxiously That's what I'm saying. You're just like so close to me at all times at that But I learned how to chew silently good. That's a good thing for you I'm gonna also forgive me. Okay you guys I left my plastic straw inside So don't yell at me. This is not an all-time occurrence and also I would just like to say something for the record. I Had a rough weekend. Okay, and That's really all I have to say No, we have the time of our lives We have had the best month. I think of our lives. So good. Yeah, it's no like like I can never get this again But this is so Good, you just normally don't The chestnut praline ice Excuse me, excuse me. Um, we have had the best month. I think probably of our entire lives No, the only thing that could have made it like one step better is if I found love because then I would have just never left Dallas, but it was like I'm not every single weekend was 15 out of 10 like every life is just so good right now It was just everything was so much fun. There was not a bad day. There was not. I mean, oh my god It was just so fun. So fun so many good times When we go low we go high. Yeah They go low. We go high. They go low. We go high. My love side came in guys So we have a lot of things to talk about tonight. My fireplace is supposed to come in I'm confused instead of three people around Saturday. It wasn't something. I need to get my nails done. Oh maybe someone stole it. I was just kidding All right, guys, this is from like three nights ago. We're finally getting up to clean it. It's honestly not that bad Um, just a lot of trash And decor of course, we had a red themed pregame if you guys didn't see the TikTok go on Just clean the house fixing all this stuff the Obviously the furniture isn't situated here because we're waiting on a fireplace to arrive But my love stock came and it's expanding for the next two days So it's just like in the corner obviously not set up But it's gonna be so cute. So cozy. We got chocolate brown I'm gonna get chocolate brown bar stools as well And once all this is actually like situated. Oh my god. I'm tripping on you fitsy Um, it's just gonna be so cozy. So very excited the couch isn't made and needs like new blankets and stuff But i'm really looking forward to this new fireplace. Obviously, it's fake But hopefully it arrives today now. We're moving into actually doing things today. Dom, how are you feeling? I mean, I just like We have many friends down today by the way. It's monday many And uh, what one of our friends took the day off because they needed a sunday And I might join Yeah, every about every friday. I tell kenzie. I don't work friday and monday Yeah, dom dom actually only works tuesday wednesday thursday and I She if you're lucky if that and I mean like Today it seems like i'm going to send off some emails schedule some zoom calls And i'm going to pack it up. I'm going to pack up the office because I'm trying to get there, but it's not it's just not happening right now Yeah, I think I need some emergency and a prayer Emergency and a prayer. Well, I'm looking through potential looks that this really sweet stylist britney I'll have her instagram linked below sent over as options for My one of my new york trips Um, and they're like so cute. So i'm gonna order some clothes get that stuff ready. Um, and I have a lot of editing and stuff to do but This is honestly like the best thing that's ever happened to me. I've never worked with a stylist before but like wow So nice All right guys, we have a little grocery haul I ordered stuff to make my favorite spoiled stomata soup too Um for lunch today after I edit but we have the italian kale tortellini soup to make I also don't like the smart sweets coffee. I've been eating so much that are currently so I just thought um, my favorite kombucha Mangoes, um, yeah, so this is what i'm gonna be doing. We will be making this in the fall time This is my go-to soup. It is so good if you guys haven't made it you need to I know so many of you guys have It's actually originally from the modern proper Um, which is like my favorite place to get recipes, but love Yeah, I don't really know what I've changed on my life other than Like fully being myself. I just don't connect with that person. I don't relate to that person. I don't know I don't know who that was. I don't know who that was. I only know kenzie at skellig It's only kenzie. I know that's only kenzie. I want to know I only know don't ask Yeah, I've asked I've asked me kid. I'm just kidding. Like we were fine then it's just we were just so young and so impressive And like the common theme is like everyone wants friends and my dance and it's always advice So when I think about that too as far as like living life like again, I could literally cry because I Love my life so much. I love the people I'm around. I love what I do for a living. I love where I live I love my house. I love my family. Like I love everything about my life, right? But I also have to remember like there are 20 people who would I I'm so lucky when it comes to the friends that I have But it's like the day after it's the recaps. You gotta call I immediately I had my two girls that I based on immediately when I wake up We went to the boys house all day. I just sat on the couch Recall were lying. I caused I stirred the pot that we could all be the first to admit it And so I had a lot of a lot of explaining to do always I have a problem guys like I I do not know when to spend myself home. I don't spend myself home actually I honestly don't it was just such a good beginning. You know what? There's just something in the air and life just feels right How did you feel about that? I'm don's also was with these days the server upstairs had a crush on dawn and bomb This was her wild night a few hours later. Dom and I just recorded a podcast episode Which will actually be up the week you guys are seeing this and also on the podcast youtube channel Currently making soup. So I have like the sausage and stuff going. This is my snack my favorite kombucha ever I'm really turning into sad for hours because don't be a smile like I might cry As we're watering also, but I might cry She doesn't care. Don't be don't be sad. Be glad Thank you my mom tells me that I cure my depression Come in um, I'm making lunch right now I'm like really hungry and also just really sad that I could cry because don't leave tomorrow. So anyways It looks really small And like I knew it was going to be small But I loved it And uh, we're gonna unbox it But realistically speaking, I don't know why there's two Eat the chat. Um earlier today. Dom and I were just talking about how we've Really never been happier We talked about this in a podcast episode that we recorded and we were just you know, whatever and I was like I'm literally like tear up because I'm just so happy And um, I don't know what happened, but within 30 minutes the Monday blues and hit we're Exhausted and my fireplace came in but it's actually gonna get installed tomorrow because I didn't realize that the setup was gonna be that confusing So someone's coming in the morning, but I'm making coffee. Don't mind me Um, I like Christmas mugs out At least I have that going for me and then I remembered that John is gonna leave tomorrow and Honestly, normally I've asked you Dom is the emotional sad one. Um, no today. It's me Well, I think Tom is still sad, but I don't think she's as sad as me. I don't think she really cares But we've literally had I'm like not exaggerating like the last month our entire lives and Yes down the way back in just a few weeks for like just a few days But it's just sad like we've had so much fun And I'm just so sad. She's leaving and then I'm gonna be by myself and normally I love being by myself and having a long time Like I'm normally by myself Majority of the time But I really haven't been alone the past month and so now I'm really scared to be alone. I'm really sad and yeah, so So it's some coffee We're gonna go Get Dom's like favorite dessert in like an hour or so with some friends And she leaves at like four a.m. Tomorrow. So it's very sad Um, I was sad as all of you guys you might all have to cry together to drop your outfit like four a.m. Tomorrow Um, but yeah, I'm trying to like make my week really busy Yeah, it's literally it feels like a breakup Yeah, Dom She doesn't care about me It's already beginning. She already forgot I exist. So anyways, I have my coffee. I'm actually gonna be ready Here we go away from huli I didn't know I'm like She was hiding in my room. She could hear me earlier saying those things and she was saying something because I was on tiktok No, Dom will straight up will she'll be another room and I like will get her name for something And then I'll say it like three times and then I'll say I know you can hear me and she's like, oh, hey, what's up About having one no, it's multiple times. So we're gonna be answering some of your friends. We're gonna do this over a drink But it's probably not the best idea right now This vlog is literally gonna be called sad girl Day sad girl day not even a frozen marg can fix Hi, kenzie and Dom So I have a question about losing friends from a past relationship So I just got out of a four-year relationship And I'm starting to notice a lot of my friends that were both mine and my boy friends are now staying loyal to him And I'm finding it hurtful to lose them and eye opening and don't know how to react because I feel upset and angry But still feel shocked at how fast they switch sides and also are not friends with his new girlfriend I was wondering just how to deal with that and also what the best moves are for moving forward Lovey both. Thanks for posting this you guys can also leave your like opinions I'm not a little low. So okay. Just just to make sure I understand Her and her boyfriend broke up and her friends are essentially choosing her like showing more She was in a four-year relationship. So her their friends were shared and now the friends are showing loyalty to him My question is would make his friends first and are they guys? Yeah, that's like really hard because like breakups Are so tough and there's so many emotions like Four years I could not imagine that that's like sharing four years of your life with someone. Oh my goodness You in a situation like that is just like open communication with your friends You know like maybe you guys used to go out in a group And then it's like because he's going to be there and it's awkward You don't go out but your friends still go out with him. You know what I'm saying Like if it's like your friends are also in an awkward position Yes, because they're like do we not what do we do? And he's maybe he's just like all embraced the awkward but like you know what I'm saying So I think the thing is you just need you need to tell your friends how you're feeling You just be like hey like I just want to let you know like I feel like this And I don't even think it's intentional but is there like Whatever essentially if you want them to like spend more time with you Like or whatever the case is you can just be like hey like I'm feeling really disconnected with you guys after the breakup Like can we go get dinner or do something? This happens all the time Like people date in friend groups and then it's awkward after and then don't I would say like it depends on because sometimes People do really horrible things But if it was just like an amical breakup do not be the person that like makes an ultimatum of like it's either me or them Or whatever Um, but I would say largely like if it's girls I just am a girl's girl like I'm with my yeah And also just like that's so fine to like if it's your girlfriends And they're like choosing your boyfriend over you or it feels like that's what's happening Like they're your friends call them out Like if any of my friends did that I'd be like whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait We loved me first, you know what I'm saying now and a lot of the times it's so unintentional even if it feels intentional I'm a recent college grad and my girl squad all came home from school And if you are really into partying and spending lots of money at fancy clubs and I can't afford to go out with them If we do hang out it's a little weird because They're living such a different life and we don't really have much in common anymore Help my entry level salary ain't cutting it and I don't know what to do We talked about finances and rich up yesterday with our friends and obviously it is totally fine Like hey, I can't do this I would try to be like hey, but do you like want to come over like we can make dinner or things like that Um, but as far as like feeling like your lifestyles are changing I would not hold on too tightly to the friendships and I don't mean that in a way of like Oh, don't argue or fight for your friendship like We always say like whole things with an open hand like for example Most people I hang out with I've known most of my life But like our friendship has looked different like some of us I've talked like so I feel like I literally talked to for like years Not like anything that happened. We just we grew apart at that time Things can circle back around but if you feel like your lifestyles are changing Um, I would try to make new friends. Yeah, and also I was gonna say so when I met like Kenzie Like Kenzie had a whole entire career. I was in college. I literally worked part-time in retail Like I my budget in college was a hundred dollars a week. Like I had no money. I was broke as a freaking joke and A lot of the time like Kenzie and I's hanging out looked like just Having dinner or like I would ask her to come over or I would go to her house And like even like ubers were expensive So like she would like I would like ride home with her from school like things like that like Kind of like accommodating like the our friendship or like what we could do together And then the thing is though is like, okay as far as like lifestyles go it seems like you're also in like a Transition like period of time So I think now is like a great opportunity to like try and find friends that are maybe like more low-key and like Don't want to go out as much and just are okay with like maybe like getting dinner once a week or walking around at the mall or just something that's not so You know like yeah budget consuming because that was like a really hard thing for me in college But I think like you know finding friends that are okay With you know reeling it in and like if you're new friends are like no like life's all about the party Because that can be fun too. But like I'm just for me personally I'm like not a club girl in the slightest I am a bar girl through and through if all of my friends started going to like fancy clubs all the time I wouldn't go and I would find another friend exactly and it's just like I like wouldn't say my love going to the bars with kenzie, but when I'm in LA like honestly Yeah, I hate going on. I all I do is like stay home or like get dinner with friends So it's like you I think it's like there's a way to find both and maybe like you only you You start seeing those friends like once every time you want to go out or can go out Like I feel like when all of our friends aren't getting married and having kids and stuff It's gonna be another thing of like oh everyone's on different pages. You grow away. You grow apart at certain points You've grown back together, but I would say largely like I am Such a proponent of saying like whole things loosely because so many of my friends in life I've been friends with them for so long, but our friendships have looked different at different times It's like I was really close to pressing when I was younger We didn't talk for like so long and now that's like my girl that I like talked to You know what you mean or like even Certain friends from like high school that I'm still close to or like even like my friends in LA Like we go through different periods of time And there I would have never thought I would have reconnected with my friends at home the way that I have But our lives we are now all in the same like period of life again. Yeah, so we like have reconnected So it's just very natural Okay, so my friend has been dating this guy for two weeks and now all of a sudden they're getting full-blown married Love is love and teach their own, but he is not the one how do I be supportive and find the urge to not just Take her and start a new life in Dallas. Love you so much guns I am so sorry. Honestly. I think there are sometimes we're in relationships with your friends You have to just kind of keep your mouth shut because it's just going to ruin the friendship with that person And like that's the wrong thing. Yeah, this is not that time. I would be like absolutely not Literally, that's what I was good about. I thought you were saying for a second No, you need to this is when you need to like show up at the altar I don't think straight all the time and kenzie shows up for me And yeah, like there's times when it's like, okay They just started dating and like maybe you're not the biggest fan of him Like, okay, maybe like keep your mouth shut and like observe him for like a couple more weeks before you say something But this is like marriage like and marriage is supposed to last forever Well, that's the goal you would hope so It's just like, okay. He's not the one two weeks You need to set her down to be like girl miss girl. I love you always start also always just say Any hard conversation preface with this is coming from love as your friend that loves you I need to let you know miss girl What are we doing? What's the rush? Like I think you just need to kind of like Talk it out with her be like girl. Why are we getting married? People rush into things too because they want to lock you in Before they can get bananas. Yeah, I just feel like girl. There's no rush like Why don't we try it out for a year and you'll still want to if you want to marry you today I want to marry you a year from now How to navigate falling in love with your best friend and not ruining your friendship back story My friend of two years and I were super close practically inseparable We knew everything about each other Then we both started to catch feelings and one night hooked up Which led to a sort of relationship that lasted three months before she started dating and got a boyfriend That's Okay, I had questions. I told her it was okay, but deep down. I don't think I was okay with that Well, yeah, because you guys were like dating so that would not make sense This ruined our friendship as we couldn't navigate going back to being friends only it's okay to lay it on thick I have a question because if you guys were like in a sort of relationship that lasted three months And then she just started dating this guy in the blue. Yeah, I feel like that's like really uncool Yeah, like you guys like didn't end and then she found this guy Yeah, I think it's like Maybe she thought you guys were like just having fun to Yeah, but here's the thing maybe it wasn't like communicated well Yeah, but regardless like I don't even if you guys were just having fun or Whatever the the situation is it's like you still need to understand to be courteous of like someone's feelings Especially because she's your friend first so like at the end of the day Like I don't know that's always the complicated thing with like dating friends is like the history of a friendship Yeah, so it's just like at the end of the day though She needs to respect you as a friend and be like hey like this is what's happening in my life But clearly you guys became more than friends so it's difficult But I think like right now like radical transparency Honestly, this one's going to take time too. I think it is really transparent now You need to probably go into it knowing that you're probably not going to be close to the friends for a while If you guys if your friendship rekindles it's going to take time an awesome thing about friendships is there's so many different kinds and Every blue moon you meet like a really special person. I would say maybe like every Year couple years you meet like a really special person who's like your person and you they they Get added onto your list of friends And so I was just like, okay, maybe you're losing a really incredible friend right now But in a little bit you never know who you're gonna meet like You know like literally one night of us. We talk about this all the time We just got dragged into going out after we were like both honestly Just like depressed and did it only the house. Yeah, and my sister made us go out and that one night Completely changed everything like literally everything about our lives. I reconnected with so many people I made so many new friends like because of that one night And you just like so that's why I'm saying like you have to be open You can't believe that like this one. This is it. This is the only time it's gonna happen Like nothing in dating recently introduced one of my friends. Let's call her Jane to my friend group I think Jane now expects to be invited every time we all hang out, which I did not intend Like can be about it sometimes when I think everyone prefer hanging out just us sometimes How do we do things about her being hurt that she wasn't invited? I cannot tell you how many times I've been in like A similar position or around I feel like this is a really common one I can get people who just I'm very open and I'm very like Uh, just like friendly out going so I have run into this before Yeah, yeah, I think the best thing to do is just kind of like Hey, like open forum if she starts to say something just like let her know like Hey, like I didn't realize you had that expectation on our friendship. This is my expectation with our friendship Yeah, that's good. I think leave it leave the conversation more like that I'm just like obviously cares so much about my friendships that In a way if it's like I don't want someone there all the time It's because like I think it's healthy for us to have a separate friend Yeah, it's never because I'm like, oh, I don't like you it's just like we need separate things This is already like yeah, and that and also it's like, okay Like not everyone has to be invited everywhere You don't have like not everyone it's my little biggest pet pee in the world And I sound so mean but it's like you don't owe everyone an invitation like a front row seat to every single thing in your life And it gets it's really frustrating to me But I get the other end of it So it is tricky But I would just say like you have to have like a communication like I would have a conversation with expectations of the friendship Hey Ken, this is gonna sound fake. I swear it's not what do I do when my best guy friends since freshman year of college Tells me my best friend. He has feelings for me and he has had these feelings since freshman year We're seniors now But I'm not supposed to know and he doesn't know that I know and also we're podcast hosts together And I'm in a happy committed relationship Also, we're all friends with each other and hang out all the time at small school Okay, I got this one. I wanted to answer this because our podcast was together so can you send me the podcast? Um Here's the thing You snooze you lose if he didn't say anything already He didn't say anything and if you were in a committed relationship, by the way I would say marry this kid like I like the story like where it's going But you're already in a relationship. You don't need to know this It's not your job to communicate that he hasn't communicated his feelings for you. I would leave it be I wouldn't say anything. Yeah, I just don't say anything act like you don't know But if this is like a beginning of like a YA rock mom and you guys like get together Like I get you're in a committed relationship But I'm just like how committed are you how committed are you to the relationship? Like does he have flaws because then I would say, you know, maybe like pause there? Explore this Like see what happens. Yeah, just a splash of but ultimately I would it's not your job to handle it Yeah Y'all tell me how I'm supposed to properly deal with moving on from my high school group of friends I can't even my only friends that I've had for years But I feel like I've outgrown most of them and understand a different lifestyle than them And it's so hard because I slowly distance myself, but it still hurts me So I actually when I like move back here the people that I thought I was gonna hang out with or not I'd never see them and it was honestly like really sad for me because I'm so like I don't really like change and like friendships and relationships much It's also like really normal to so normal like grieve relationships, you know And it feels sad because like your cup it's it's almost like it almost feels like a breakup because it's no one's fault Like it's just it's like no one's fault. You guys are just changing So there's a little grief process involved, but at the same time I think it's really important to keep an open mind to the idea that You there's actually a group of people that are going to like serve your lifestyle better and like being there Yeah, and there's and it's like being more open and like kind of Finding ways to be creative to find those relationships rather than focusing on like the relationships you're losing I they're not your people right now. There will be other people and you will like You'll find them. This one is also my biggest puppy Um, my best friend is really possessive and jealous when I talk to other friends She wants to talk on the phone way more than my capacity and it makes me feel exhausted to explain to her that I don't have the mental bandwidth to meet her expectations all the time I've tried having these combos, but she makes me feel really guilty and I leave the situation just trying to keep her happy But I obviously feel resentful and sad because I'm not respecting my own boundaries. Please help because I love her I just want to handle this. Yeah, she's already had conversations. So I'm gonna go about it as though you've already had all these conversations with her There are times when You need to take major setbacks from friendship and I'm not saying that you guys will never be friends again But I think at this point This is draining you way too much and that's not a real friendship. I it drives me I cannot do clingy it drives me absolutely insane I'm also like a floater with friends. Like I have a different groups So I like the second that I feel suffocated in a friendship It makes me like I turn into like a different person like I get really antsy. I hate it for whatever reason and I would just say at this point you have like you have to set your boundaries Yeah, and like it's not like how she reacts is not your problem Yeah, if you've already had like she's already had conversations Yeah, and I think the biggest thing too is to just like hey, you know, like you already told her like Be like my capacity's changed like right now I'm like I don't have time to answer and if she starts blowing your shit up like dude Now's the appropriate time to stop responding because she's like crossing over a boundary You know what I'm saying? So it's like, okay. Yeah, and also it seems like there's a little ounce of like Codependency on her side and like That is probably not the best thing like an unhealthy dose of codependency This girl said one of my best friends recently started hanging out with this guy It's the closest she's ever gotten to a relationship She's so excited about it and falling out of her heels for him amazing, right? So happy for her but since they started dating two months ago I've literally only seen her twice. I've texted and called her she used the plant cancelling on plans It's pretty isolating because all my friends are hours away I'm happy for her But I'm also getting really sick of being cancelled on Call my ever-wrapping and just need to suck it up and take the third wheel hangs to my friend or is there something I can say to her Okay, there's two sides to this one when you say like all of our friends are a few hours away So her and I are the closest and like you feel lonely. I would say like This is the one thing that I would say like keep in mind on your end Like it isn't her fault too that like most of your friends don't live near you Like don't put all of your eggs in one basket with one friend because things like this can happen and like they will happen So I would just be aware of like, oh maybe like just make more friends in your area on the other end That is really annoying. It's been two months and you've literally only seen her twice. That's like really bad Um, but I always lean more on the end of like especially if this is like her first relationship When this stuff happens like I don't know I used to take a lot more offense to this When I was younger of like a friend all of a sudden like ditching for a guy But like everyone at one point is going to like do that or get in a relationship be excited about it Whatever I would just give a lot more grace with it two months to a long time though for it to be like that Yeah, here's the thing and I I've honestly I'm the consistent single friend like honestly, I'm like consistently single and if I am seeing a guy It's not ever to the point where it messes with like seeing my friends So there's definitely I've had multiple like really good friendships where like they've got lost in like, you know The sauce the man's sauce So I think the other thing too is it's just like tell them because more than likely they're not realizing it And like okay, say you tell them and they're like, okay And they still don't change then hey that just means that they're in a different time where they want to You know invest in that relationship Hey kind of shitty that like, you know, they're not making time for you But like can be saying perfect opportunity to make friends because you should also like having friends closer to you is going to feel a lot better And you're not going to be so dependent on this person But at the same time I've definitely lost friends like really good friends to like, you know Boyfriends and it sucks and it never feels good high school I would have gotten a lot more annoyed about this and I think it still is annoying But I think one went in great opportunity to make other friends Like I would never just have one friend to wear all your eggs in room one basket and then that Obviously like causes problems. I do think she's gonna work consider it and definitely make more time for you But this is kind of just like life like people get in relationships And then they're with their significant other more or whatever and like every I feel like everyone's going to be annoying With a boy at one point So I always lean more on the side of like I'll ignore it Like it's not going to give a deal and it'll be fine And then most likely they're probably going to break up at some point unless you're married And then like don't be the person that's like like I don't know just be there for your friend Everyone has stupid things like that But I also think like It's really important to also tell her how you're feeling Because if you don't you're just gonna literally end up hating her guts. Yes, and get really resentful My friend is talking behind my back about me to our mutual best friend I honestly don't want to be friends with her anymore because she treats me like an enemy at this point But I have to keep acting like we're best friends for our other mutual best friend thoughts on how to move forward Yeah, okay, so It clearly sounds like you don't want to be friends with this girl And I get it I've been in situations where like I haven't really had much of an interest in being friends with someone But they're friends with people that I really care about and that I spent a lot of my time with So I don't want to put them in an awkward position In whatever and honestly, I wish that I would have from day one Made plans with those friends for like our own plans and not been Put myself in a position to kind of force a friendship with someone that like I just didn't really did a vibe with because it just causes problems as far as like I don't know I think I think right now like you guys she kind of got caught Like you caught her and so now any time like something like that happens where I feel like this is the perfect Opportunity for you guys to like go get dinner drinks not drinks dinner Coffee and just air clear the air like whether it ends and you guys you'll you'll be civil and like if you guys hang out in the same Places like the same bars You guys have a group dinner together and you guys can be chill But it definitely seems like you guys don't enjoy each other Especially since she feels like she can't come to you for whatever reason so it's like now's the perfect opportunity to clear the air and Just kind of move forward so that there's no more tension for your other friends too Because it doesn't feel good if like your other friends feel caught in the middle So like I would just approach it head on and be like hey I feel like we're off on the wrong foot right now and there's like a lot of tension Let's just like go grab lunch and clear the air. Yeah. Yeah, and just attack things like that. You have to attack head on last one okay So my best friend of 12 years started dating this guy. He's related to this girl that you both talked shit about That doesn't matter I was honest with her about my shock and feeling of doubt for other for other reasons mainly because she started dating him When she just moved to grad school and long distance which in the past doesn't work out well with her She then proceeded to Push me away and seems distant I open up to her about my insecurity about feeling like I'll be faced out of her life and friendship and all from This guy that she barely knows she guilted me for saying the reason she's distant is because of me and my feelings being honest I feel hurt and secure and confused and we've passed it. I don't I know so many friends don't like their Restaurants boy friends It's just hard because we have never had a big dispute and fight like this one now where it feels awkward Okay, so I don't think that him being related to someone that you guys don't like has anything to do with him um there like I there are people that are dating my best friends that I don't like and Okay, I think it depends on your level of friendship like if you told me you don't like a guy that I was dating I wouldn't want to date them, but I think it Kind of sounds like you are I think that I I don't know because I don't know the details of why you don't like him It sounds like they don't like him more because you're afraid like it sounds almost like a territorial thing And like yet as we get older like you have to like let your friends live and yeah and Get in relationships and things like that but like On the other end though, I will like Play the devil's advocate of Let's say That he's toxic right and like She's ignoring you. She's kind of like giving you the peace signs and it's like red flag city If you've said what you needed to say and she's still not listening to you Just there's nothing that you can say Sorry you guys There's nothing that you can say that will get her to listen to you So I would kind of just take the L on the situation Unfortunately, she's going to learn the hard way and it sucks and like you might For a season lose out on a friendship But at the same time like if someone's not going to listen to you someone's not going to listen to you and like you have nothing to be afraid of And because like we keep saying consistently there's always going to be more people for you But I don't think if she's caught up in toxic city Like you got to let her live there and she's not going to listen to you happen to me before where I'm like Hey, the guy that you're dating is a wacky wacko like he's toxic and they're just like no Actually, you're like and flip the script and that's the problem I would say more often than not depending on your relationship depending on what time you say this in their relationship, whatever It's like you were always the bad guy. Yeah, you talk poorly about someone's like partner to them It's I don't think it's always worth it and I think it hurts your relationship a lot more Yeah, then it does any good and again, I think it depends on the relational equity that you have So like she she doesn't list off a bunch of reasons why she's like yeah, all she's afraid of That's why I'm saying I don't think this guy is like really that crazy like toxic I'm just offering the other side and a lot of the dms that I've gotten like so many were about like Feel like you're losing friends to relationships and things like that Like eventually most people are gonna get married So like I think that that actually is something that you have to like normalize more and not take so personally And not get offended by because there will come a time like there's your significant other will come first And like if you marriage or whatever and so I do think like As we're getting into our 20s the advice is changing from like don't do that to like Like I don't know on when it like you have people grow up and like even at 25 Some people aren't wanting to be with their friends like they were at 23 And like they're you know getting into relationships building a life with some of things like that like Don't be the person that's like sitting there So jealous and like ruining your friendships because you're mad that your friends Don't have as much time for you as they get older and they're gonna have less time for you But I also think I will say this though to the people that are in relationships And like you realize and you've made your significant other your whole life Don't throw away your friendships for a person like honestly, I also don't think the relationship you should be in Yeah, if but I just mean that like I've I've lost so many good friends Two relationships where it just became like them against the world And and like it sucks because like I lost a really good friend And it sucks seeing that they had no one At the end of the relationship Like we they literally have not a single person that actually is like they're they don't even have a best friend Like that's so sad. It's like you like and there will never come a time in your life where you don't need Need friendships. Yeah, exactly. So I just mean like, you know, it's both. It's like Hey space for them to like explore the relationship But also if you're in a relationship do not throw away your friends And I also think that like your friends like you better and make your relationship better I don't think anyone should can I'm not saying like oh, don't be mad. They're like like I mean Don't be mad at the expectations of the friendship or changing. Yeah, that's gonna happen as we get older regardless Don't completely like I'm not saying like oh, don't be friends with your friends I'm just saying like you need to like hold it with a loose hand Eventually, we're gonna get older and like and like yeah, like less there's gonna be less time that you can like Yeah, and of course But like you don't want to lose your friend like yeah people are like what matter in life Exactly just like be weary of that because like we've seen people literally lose like they had no one to invite Literally no one to invite to the wedding and it was like the saddest shit ever Yeah, like I I would rather die than to have my wedding. It's just us. Oh my god. I also just let I don't know I'm like a big friend or something. I know I just I'm obsessed with my friends Yeah, I literally love every single friend that I have so the idea of like My friends feeling you know, I don't know if you're in a relationship and you feel like you can't be with your friends I would question that relationship You know, I always wonder like so random and if you guys have stories about this, let me know I always hear from people like oh We've been friends for years and like we never even thought about it and then at like 30 We like got together got married and I'm like, I wonder if one of our friends like that's gonna be the story There's two people that I hope that happens for and they there's multiple people that I feel like it's gonna happen Do that like to have no feelings for each other no feelings for each other No, and later or like how to history and yeah, and right now and then later on they're gonna be like, oh my gosh Yeah, the scales have been removed. I'm just like excited to see like what I want to see that would just be a fun wedding All I'll throw out some predictions after this video. Okay, because I've been outside living in I I've been thinking. Okay. Well, I'm also a great matchmaker. We have been recording for 40 minutes in the vlog So we're gonna go To the rustic for dinner. If you have to pick up a friend guys the day we've all been dreading has come It's so sad Guys look who it is. Are you just the cutest thing I've ever seen Are you just the cutest thing I've ever seen did we get a new puppy? Yes, not for this house though, right I'm actually crying how perfect you are today has just been a catch-up day. I've been so exhausted I've been on puppy duty just been cleaning. Um, I dropped drama for the at the airport at like 5 a.m It was really depressing, but I've had a puppy with me all day. Um, so you guys are probably Confused and have a few questions. This is how she's currently sitting. What's up girl technically? She doesn't have a name yet. This is actually my brother's dog My brother and sister live like down the street from me My brother isn't the biggest dog person that we know. He always takes care of our dogs. Oh, she's so cute So my sister and I got him a dog. Technically this is his Christmas gift. It's really early, but he is currently out of town So, uh, he doesn't even know that we got this dog yet It's actually I mean he knows that we were getting him a dog But he doesn't know that we currently have the dog. So we are on puppy duty. Hi cutie I love you. We have so many dogs in my family and that feels like they're all mine. Okay, okay Hi, she gets a random burst of energy and then she sleeps most of the day. I get it. I get it. I get it She's literally so cute. I am obsessed with her and I'll be with her all the time because she's also my neighbor and my Needs. Okay, buddy. Seriously. Cheers. She's so cute, but I will have her I don't even know how long anyways. That is it for this vlog. Hope you guys enjoyed subscribe if you guys are new Let me guess much. I'll talk to you soon Say bye Winnie. He's like, well, I hate the song But he's like real religious and he was like, but I love you and he was like I just want what's best for you and all this stuff and I was just For me with my story It's really cool because here you have this song that's you know explicit and all this stuff And it's funny and it is definitely part of my personality like