 I'm the comic weekly man, the jolly comic weekly man, and I'm here to read the funnies to you happy boys and honeys. Yes, boys and girls, it's comic weekly time, and here I come right into your house to bring a little fun and happiness. Right out of the pages of Puck the Comic Weekly, straight into your living room, your friend, the comic weekly man, the jolly comic weekly man. Well, little Miss Honey, how are you today? I'm just fine, just fine. And how's your friend, Bob? Just fine. What, what? Oh, that's terrible. What was the riddle? Well, about it. Oh, that's easy. Have you heard it before? No, no, I just figured it out now. What is it? Oh, that Bobby certainly is a dumb one. What is it? Well, I wouldn't want to take the honor away from you for answering such a hard riddle as that. All right, I'll tell you. It's noise. Yes, noise. Oh, that Bobby sure is a dumb one. Are you dumb? Of course I did. Oh, that Bobby certainly is. Are you sure you knew? Don't you think it's time to read the funnies? Oh, yes, please. Pocthicomic Weekly, all right? I'll read that in just a moment. But before I do, let's listen to this nice man. Oh, here we go with Pocthicomic Weekly. And on the first page, Hop along Cassidy. Magic words for the music, please. Very well, my lady. Six cons blazing as he thunders along. Give us music for Hop along. There's been an outburst of robberies around the town of Buckskin. The ringleader was a man called the chameleon because he always changes his disguise. Hoppy is working with the Rangers to try to catch the man who is called the chameleon. The stagecoach has left the town of Buckskin with a strong box of gold. Thinking that the chameleon may be on this stagecoach, Hoppy is written after it. He's jumped off topper and on to the stagecoach. And it defines the land with a patch over one eye. He gives him some trouble. Hoppy knocks him out. Sound of shots, Hoppy looks out the window to see a group of men trying to hold up the coach. Last picture top row, he says. Well, if this meddlesome passenger I slugged as the chameleon, his friends aren't giving me a chance to see who's behind his disguise. Quickly, Hoppy opens the door of the coach. Climbs up on top. Second picture, second row, he sees the box containing the gold and exclaims, ah, strong box. This is what they're after. The driver turns around. Hoppy says, I don't mind me. Keep your hands in those reins. Last picture top row is the stage around the bend. Out of sight of the pursuing horseman, Hoppy with a strong box in his hand leaps off the coach. And none too soon. For a moment later, the band of horsemen ride by. Overtake the coach and stop it. Pull up there, pull up there, will you? One of the riders gels. Now, where's that strong box you're hauling? We'll take it off your hands. The driver answers, somebody already beat you to it. Then the passenger with a black patch over his eye appears in the door of the stage coach. He's telling the truth, boys. Cassidy slugged me before I could get to it. And he probably jumped off, taking a loot with him. One of the horsemen says, well, he can't have gone far. The passenger orders last picture. Double back and find him. And Hoppy, lying behind a tree a short distance away, sees the men turn around and head back in his direction. Oh, so surely finding. Yes, that many men searching the neighborhood. I don't know how they can miss finding Hoppy. I'm afraid what they'll do to him, because that passenger with a black patch over his eye looks awfully, awfully mean. Yes, he does. Well, we'll find out what happens next week. Now? Oh, now can we go over the page? Because I'm sure Prince Valiant is there. Well, you've been right so many times. I'm sure you're sure now. So over the page we go. And here we are, Prince Valiant on page three. And you remember Prince Valiant and I were on a hunting trip. And as they were crossing a river that was flooded, a tree knocked their horses over, and their horses were drawn. And Prince Valiant and Arf can't walk back home, because the long walk would be impossible for Arf, who lost one of his legs in an accident and now has a wooden leg. No, so they're making a boat. And Val made a fire by striking two stones together like the Boy Scouts do. And then he got food from the river by spearing his face. Yes, now let's see how they make out with their boat. Here we go with Prince Valiant in the days of King Arthur, heck-it-break-it, gray-mulkin and quince, music romantic for a fair, fair prince. Valiant and Arf have spent their second night in the wilderness. And when morning comes, Arf arises to find Prince Valiant already up and standing in the shallows among the spawning salmon, spearing the day's supply of food. After breakfast, big picture top row, the boat building begins. And Arf sees the reason for yesterday's hard work. With all the materials assembled, trimmed and shaped, the frame of the craft takes form quickly. Slender but sturdy branches are worked into the shape of a canoe. Then they're tied together by the thongs that Arf has cut out of the horse's skin. And first picture next row, nimble fingers and the ingenuity of men trained in self-reliance soon have the frame ready for covering. Then into a seamless container of bark, Val puts brusque gum and balsam. Powdered charcoal is added as a binder. Next, a hot stone is dropped in. Soon they have a boiling, sticky liquid to serve for glue. Then the hides of the horses are spread over the frame and sewed into place. While they're sealing the seams with the liquid they have made, the wind dies away. And out from the marshy places come hundreds of mosquitoes. Oh, these mosquitoes eat you up, Val. Last picture, second row, two very unhappy people finish the canoe. Finally, first picture, bottom row, the canoe is finished. Val has hung the salmon over the fire to cure so they'll have food to take along on their trip. He and I have run to the fire and stand on the smoke of the fire, their eyes smarting, and here they wait until the chilling night winds shall drive the mosquitoes away. Next morning after breakfast the canoe is launched and Val and his crippled squire commit themselves to the unknown river and they head for home. They are wagering their lives that their skill can offset all the dangers that thundering waters can present. Yes, it just goes to show you how helpful it is to know about trees and nature. Yes, please. Well, we'll find out more about this next week. Now let's turn over the page. Right. Yes, Flash Gordon. And remember last week he was saved from the flood and made friends with Prince Savvy who was the new ruler of Mars. And Prince Savvy and Flash decided to work together so they could have peace, which I think is very sensible. Yes, it is. And then Flash started back toward Earth in a rocket ship. But when he was looking into that machine that he could see everything in, and then he saw that the Earth was all covered with ice. Yes, the Earth was entirely covered with ice. So let's find out now what Flash finds next. Here we go with Flash Gordon. Regga regga dune dune saskimatash. Let's have music for heroic Flash. Fireing is break rockets for a landing on Earth. Flash is amazed to find that all North America is deep in snow and ice. Workers at the rocket port have managed to clear a small landing place. It's a tight squeeze, but Flash jockeys his giant ship in safely. As they get out of the ship, they can't believe their eyes. They see snow drips as high as skyscrapers, and they wonder what could have happened. Last picture top row, they see a giant ship in the air. Last picture top row, port director says, I come with me. I'll explain later. Flash is taken to a meeting of top level scientists where he's shown telepictures with a strange calamity that has befallen the Earth. First picture bottom row, the famous explorer scientist, Icy Stark explains that a new electronic force in the upper air spreading down from the Arctic is shutting off the heat of sunlight, and he boasts. Other research jets and rockets have crashed, but my polar expedition will find the answer. Over Stark's bitter protests, the group assigns Flash to the project. Stark agrees grudging. Okay, I'll take Gordon and the girl if they can get ready in time. We'll even an hour. Flash's reply is terse. We're ready now. Last picture heavily loaded with supplies and apparatus. The expedition roars north into the flaring Aurora Borealis. Flash tells Stark, you know this change in the Northern Lights is too sudden for a freak of nature. I've got to hunch at some interplanetary attack. Stark's reply is a contemptuous snare of disbelief, but Daniel is sure that Flash is right. For someone who's making war on the Earth to change the air and to shut off the sunlight. That's exactly what Flash is saying. We'll find out that someone's doing this. Isn't that terrible? Yes, it is. Well, I hope that man Stark doesn't call Flash too much trouble. We'll find out more about that next week. Now, how'd you like to see what Dick is doing? Oh, yeah, I'm so excited. You bet they are. So let's go to the very last page of the first section, the very last page of the first section and here's Dick's adventures. And you remember the addition into the Wild West with Captain Lewis and Captain Price. Yes, and they've worked their way up the Missouri River to where it begins in the Rocky Mountain. And that was where there was some waterfalls and they had to travel on land for 16 miles around the waterfalls. And it was funny. Yes, but at work, they were moving steadily through a ravine helped by the wind which was pulling their wagons along. Ships on land. And then pull, what'll happen now? Well, let's read now and find out. Here we go with Dick's adventures. Say the magic words with me. Rigiddy pack, zig, zig, zig. Let's have music for adventure as Dick. The wind dies down. The heavy wagons come to a stop. The men are wondering what to do. On a cliff above, three mysterious white men are watching the Lewis and Clark expedition below. Suddenly the sky darkens. And a moment later, last picture top row, a storm of frightful intensity burst down on the Americans. Torrents of water fill the ravine and their bomb bodies of pale stones the size of rocks. Americans are caught in the flood which sweeps down on them. First picture next row for a few minutes longer, the three strangers watch the Americans struggling frantically to escape from the ravine, now turned into a raging flood. One of the men says, ah, let them drown. That's what we want, no. But the leader shouts angrily, yes, they are our enemies. But it is good to let men die like this. Anyway, I have a better plan. He leaves the way. And the three strangers quickly go to work, throwing lines to the men struggling in the flooded ravine. Last picture second row to Dick and his comrades a sudden appearance of help by three strange men is nothing short of a miracle. One by one, the men are saved from the rushing waters. And then, first picture bottom row, the three strangers work like men of mercy doing everything possible to give aid to the bruised half-drowned Americans, even saving most of their stores and equipment. When the storm is over, the men dry themselves out of the fire. Captain Lewis turns to the leader of the three men and says, gentlemen, we owe you our lives. The United States government shall learn of your heroism. I shall report it myself to Mr. Jefferson when God willing, we reach the Pacific and return. But who are you? And then last picture, the miracle abruptly ends. In cold harsh tones, the leader speaks. We want no recognition from the United States government. We are soldiers of spin. You will never be allowed to reach the Pacific. That is strange behavior. Yes. Maybe we'll find out something next week to make you understand this. Now look below Dick's adventures. Oh, look, Rusty Riley. And I'll read that in just a moment, but first here's that nice man again with something interesting to say. Now here we go again with Puck the Comic Weekly and on the bottom of the last page of the first section, Rusty Riley. Magic words for the music, please. Very well, my lady. Gell up and run till the road is dusty. Give us music for his horse and Rusty. Rusty and Peter follow the two crooks, Sir Percival and Knobbs, to the old abandoned house where they had hidden the valuables they've stolen for Mr. Miles' sake. Thinking that Knobbs and Sir Percival have gone back to town in the car, they've slipped into the old house to search for the valuables. Just as they found the loot in the basement, they heard a door slam on them. Rusty exclaims, Gosh, Pete, somebody bolted the door to this cellar. We're trapped down here. Pete replies, Hey, good night, Sir Percival and his man Knobbs must have come back. Gee, Wilkins, if they know we found where they hid the horseshoe trophies, there's no telling what they'll do to us. Yeah, you're right. We better put them back quick. Last picture, top row. As Pete starts to lower the loot in the hole where they found it, Rusty says, Hey, wait a second, Pete, I got an idea. Let's try to find a new hiding place for the stuff and then fill the hole they dug as if we hadn't discovered it at all. Yes, well, if they think we're not wise to them, they may let us go. So quickly, they look around for a place to hide the stuff. First picture, bottom row, Pete says, Hey, Rusty, hey, hey, look what's under this rubbish. A shallow cistern still has water in it. And water won't hurt the trophies. Let's drop them in quick and put the rubbish back. Meanwhile, second picture, bottom row. Outside the old house, Knobbs, who has been standing guard after locking the boys in, here's footsteps coming up the path and then sees Sir Percival in the moonlight. Percival says, Well, I returned the car to the rental service, Knobbs, and caught a bus out here right away. Is everything all right? Yeah, we got a couple of visitors, pass. Them kids followed us in that art rod. The kids are locked in the cellar and the jalopy is behind the barn. I say now be way the long face. Fortune still smiles on us. Now we have a car. Let the boys out one at a time so we can tie them up. There's plenty of sash cord in these old windows. All right, Pice, but you've got to help. They ain't no babies or no... Last picture, Knobbs comes out of the house with Rusty and Pete. Sir Percival says... Now, my dear young friends, your interest in our activities has become very trifle-embarassing. Consequently, we're about to enjoy your ride, your remarkable car. It'll be a bit crowded, but we'll manage. Get the car, Knobbs. Pete answers. You won't get away with this, you big phony. Take the boys away with them. I don't know. You don't think they will hurt the boys, do you? I can't answer that either. That Percival. You never can tell what's going on in his mind. He's a clever creature. Oh, I wish the detectives will find them before they leave. Well, maybe they will. Well, they haven't gotten away yet. My, I hope they get them. Well, let's stop worrying now, though, and read Dagwit and Blondie. All right, in a second. And we won't perry a second. Here we go with Dagwit and Blondie and say the magic words with me, please. Ramaphore, Ramaphon, Zim Zim Zummy, come to me music for Dagwit and Blondie. Dagwit sees a letter lying on the table. He picks it up and says to his daughter, Cookie, you forgot to mail this letter for me. No, I didn't, Daddy. I was so busy playing, I didn't have time to mail it. Dagwit gets so angry, he burns. And he exclaims, excuse us. All I get around here is excuses. And he turns to Alexander, last picture top row. And I thought I asked you to pick up my shoes at the shoe repair shop. Well, I was going to do it tomorrow, Pop. Dagwit gets so angry, he boils. He goes into the kitchen, first picture, next row. He sees Blondie warming up the can of soup on the stove. He says, and you, you, you, you promised me this morning we'd have corned beef and cabbage for supper. Blondie replies, I'm sorry, dear. Mrs. Woodley dropped in for a chat and I didn't get a chance to go to the market for corned beef. And Dagwit's so angry, he hauls. More excuses. Everybody has an excuse for not doing what they're supposed to do. And he goes into the living room and settles down in a chair yelling, I'm offended. Later, Blondie decides to put up the draperies. She says to the children, first picture, next row. The ladder is broken. Would you please hold it for me while I put up these drapes? Oh, sure, Mom. So Alexander holds one side of the ladder and Cookie the other side. And Blondie climbs up the ladder to hang the drapes. Up, up, up, she goes. And suddenly the ladder starts to slip. Hey, it's slipping, Mom. I can't hold it. Oh, my goodness. Dagwit leaps to his feet. Last picture, third row. His legs begin to quiver. He takes one step and he goes up. His legs begin to quiver. He takes one step, first picture, bottom row. Hurry, Dagwit, hurry. Suddenly his feet collapse. And he crumbles to the floor. And he hears. Last picture, he crawls into the dining room and sees Blondie and the children lying in a heap around the ladder. And he says, my foot was asleep. And Blondie, who's steaming with rage, replies, that I ever heard. Funny. That's insane. As he spoke a little too soon. Yes, it's off. Maybe we'd all be better off if we never bragged. Yes, maybe we would. Now look underneath Dagwit and Blondie. There's Roy Rogers. Oh, and I'm a cowboy. Yes. The old Cosmo who loves trees and hates people who chop them down sent a pile of logs rolling down after Roy. And the logs crashed into the engine house and set it on fire. And then... Let's read now and find out. Here we go with Roy Rogers, King of the Cowboys. Ah, yep, I owe. Now here we go with Roy and Trigger. Ah, yep, I owe. The fire has been put out and the donkey engine has been repaired. Roy and Wildwood ride off to search for old Cosmo to settle the score. And Pauline has warned them to be careful because she's not sure that Cosmo's the only one responsible for all the accidents in her camp. Third picture top row, they come upon Etch Snead. Wildwood asks him if he's seen anything of Cosmo. He tells him, I saw his moth eating burrow over by the river Skidway, Wildwood. And as they ride off, last picture top row he says to himself, Ha, ha, it worked. The whole Cosmo's ready. Rogers is a dead timber duck. And I'm back in the log pirating business. First picture bottom row, they come to the top of a hill overlooking the river Skidway, which is a chute leading from the top of the hill down to the river below, on which the logs are slid down into the water. Roy says, All right, now you wait here and keep your eyes scanned, Wildwood. As Roy approaches the Skidway, old Cosmo hears his steps approaching. Cosmo hides the crouches behind the logs at the head of the Skidway. He's holding a log hook in his hands and he says to himself, Hey, Rogers at last. And Etch says, If I do away with him, he won't turn me in to Pauline Bunyan for tormenting the timberman. As Roy steps to the edge of the chute, Cosmo stands up and clubs him. Roy Tomble headlong down the chute. And now you pay for him when those horn-way loggers destroy them. The last picture as Roy tries to get to his feet, Cosmo yells, So long, Mr. I'll see if you can slide down to the Greek Skidway before the next log over kicks you. That log crashes down on Roy. I don't see how he'll ever escape. Neither do I. Well, we'll find that out next week. Now? Oh, now? Could we read Uncle Remus? I think we could. Let's turn over the page. Go past little iodine, past the little king, turn over another page, and there's Uncle Remus and his tales of Brer Rabbit. Say the magic words with me. Hippity hoppy, make it a habit to give us music for Old Brer Rabbit. Uncle Remus says, When Brer Rabbit starts out to prove something, he generally makes a mighty good argument. The Brer Rabbit sees a yellow hammer. That's a bird flying around in the air. He points to it and says, Well, well, well, well, he's already under it. Old Brer Yellow Hammer flying in his sleep. Brer Coon replies, Now what do you mean? Birds don't fly in their sleep. My course birds fly in their sleep, same as folks walking in their sleep. Always loosen their head, Brer Rabbit. I don't believe it. Whereupon Brer Rabbit takes Brer Coon by the arm, third picture top row, and leads him down the road saying, All right, come on then. I'll prove it to you by Brer Buzzard. They come to Brer Buzzard lying alone to sleep at the foot of a tree. Last picture top row. Brer Rabbit says, Now you'll watch Brer Coon and he leans down and says in Brer Buzzard's ear, Brer Buzzard needs a cloud up yonder with a silver lining. Start flying. Brer Buzzard hears him in his sleep and he raises up and starts to flap his wings. Brer Rabbit says, first picture bottom row. You can use some of that silver lining, Brer Buzzard. Get going. Brer Buzzard starts flying around. Brer Rabbit says, There you see, he's flying. How do you know he's flying in his sleep? Suddenly, Brer Buzzard flies straight into a tree and he drops to the ground unconscious and there he lays with a different kind of snore. Brer Rabbit says, Now what did you say, Brer Coon? Brer Coon throws up his hands when he flies. Well, anyways, Brer Buzzard sure is sleeping now. And Uncle Rima says, Yeah, she is breathing and sometimes deceiving. Well, it makes as much sense as people walking in their sleep. He certainly, certainly did. Now that's all the time I have. But before I go, here's that nice fellow with some more information. Get all your boys and girls, I gotta go now. All right, Miss Honey. Okay, that's a date and a date with all your boys and girls. Be sure to meet me with a little friend Miss Honey next week when I read Puck the Comic Weekly. Or I'm the Comic Weekly Man, the Jolly Comic Weekly Man. I'll be back to read the funnies to you happy boys and honeys. Don't forget, boys and girls, see you all next week. Your friend the Comic Weekly Man, the Jolly Comic Weekly Man.