 So, you went out with someone, hoping to be more than just a friend. In your mind, it felt like more than a date, but it turned out the other person had a different idea. It was just a hangout to get to know each other. Now you're confused, was it a date or a hangout? Love is always risky, because the potential for hurt is so great. The scariest thing about pursuing love is rejection. Someone you love could also move away before you could make your feelings known. In the words of Rolling Stones, you can't always get what you want. So we decided it might be helpful to share some ways to get over someone you were never with. Number one, accept those feelings. Right after a rejection, you're probably feeling raw. Sadness is inevitable, and you may even feel a little angry. While we can't say the feelings are rational, they are certainly understandable. Denying those feelings will only slow down the process of moving on. You'll be hung up on your feelings, insisting you don't care. Accepting negative emotions has been shown to reduce their effect and make people react better to stressors later on. It's okay to care. It's okay to feel hurt. Number two, ask yourself why. Once you have come to terms with your feelings, try to reflect on what happened, what went wrong. Perhaps you were too needy or didn't make a good impression. There's also a genuine chance that this person just wasn't into you. And that's okay. Through the whole reflection process, try to put yourself in their shoes. It's also important not to play the blame game and to try to remain objective. At this point, it isn't about who was right or who was wrong. Remember, the goal is moving on with a better understanding of how you approach your passionate feelings and relationships. Number three, repair your self-esteem. The sting of rejection can have a big impact on your self-esteem. You don't want this event to define how you see yourself. Feeling like you don't deserve good things or relationships can result from low self-esteem. So, to move on, we need to keep our heads high. Some people look for easy ways to heal their ego, like meaningless sex. But this is unlikely to help in the long term. Rather than looking for external validation, try to build on a strong foundation by improving on the things that may be keeping you from feeling proud and accomplished. In other words, number four, invest in your growth. This sounds like business lingo, but it doesn't necessarily have to do with money or a career. You could use this time to improve your career as being single means you don't have an extra person to consider when making career decisions. But it can also mean becoming proficient in your hobbies and the things you enjoy. Most importantly, no matter what you do to improve your self-esteem, do not fuel it with bitterness. Improve for yourself and your inner well-being. Make sure that the decisions you make are about being happy and about genuinely improving and growing as a person. Number five, make some boundaries. It may feel like setting boundaries with someone you were never with doesn't make sense. Setting boundaries in this context has nothing to do with a relationship and everything to do with your mental health. These boundaries are about you. It can be something as simple as muting them on social media. Sometimes people need these boundaries because after a night of drinking with friends, it can be all too tempting to send an embarrassing message out of the blue. And then, once again, things are awkward between the two of you. Other boundaries can be not doing favors for them anymore or limiting when and why you see them. Your boundaries should be in place to help you move on and should not be an excuse to behave rudely or emotionally manipulative. This is a tough time. Your heart must be feeling tender, so don't feel ashamed for still wanting to talk to them or to find another way to make things work. The best thing you can do is to talk to somebody about it. If not a professional, then you should, number six, embrace your other relationships. Just because things didn't pan out like you wanted, you don't have to be lonely. The most commonly given reasons for having friends were to socialize, to be with people you like and, most importantly, to receive support. After facing any kind of rejection, time with your friends can be incredibly healing and vital for your mental health. Hitting over someone is not easy. Those butterflies in your stomach won't want to leave. Those warm, fuzzy feelings are hard to let go. Don't give up. To quote the Rolling Stones one more time, if you try sometimes, you just might find you get what you need. Moving on can only help you. What you need could be just around the corner. If you found today's video helpful, leave a like on the video. For more psychology facts, subscribe to Psych2Go and we'll see you next time. You've got this.