 I mean, not a great first impression on your new boss. Miri-less training for her new life is daredevil. Even Halbrand wasn't somehow dead, the horse's sure would be, you know, okay. King of a village that exploded. Well, after the way episode seven ended, I'm dying to know how the Southlanders are doing. But we start this episode with not Gandalf, who drops his apple, which then Griggy scampers away with it. Oh, just kidding. Nori takes it, takes back the apple that she gave to him and oh, just kidding, it's actually the pop star who cleverly shape-shifted to lure not Gandalf away from the tree he was standing near towards a different tree. It's a very brilliant way to take your enemy bicep. Oh, just kidding. According to them, this is Sauron and they are here to serve him. Not sure why they needed to trick him and freak him out like that. I mean, not a great first impression on your new boss. Galadriel meanwhile is galloping across all of Middle Earth with a super dead Halbrand behind her. Then we cut to Kelle Brimborn, who was wishing that they could somehow do more with less because all they have is this tiny little nugget of Mithril. This is of course, when Elrond explains that while he was in Khazadum, they learned that this little nugget has infinite healing properties. And if they just pass this little nugget around, then every elf can be healed. Oh wait, he doesn't say that. Hmm. I wonder if Durin made him vow not to share that secret too. Galadriel meanwhile demonstrates the incredible strength of Elfkind by leaping from her horse while wearing full plate armor. She tells them that they've been riding for six days straight without rest, which of course is a figure of speech in elf culture. I mean, if they have literally ridden six days without rest, even if Halbrand wasn't somehow dead, the horses sure would be. Elrond takes one look at this dying stranger that she's dumped on their doorstep and is like, I should not have sent you on that ship. But Elrond shouldn't feel too badly about it. After all, it was Gilgalad that sent her on that ship. Galadriel tells Elrond, when I left from that ship, all I could do was swim and hope that I had chosen wisely. I mean, if she meant the swimming, yeah, I mean, probably wise. Either get busy swimming or get busy nighting. If she meant the leaping though, probably not her brightest move. But Galadriel decided that her weekend adventure is now universally applicable to all of Elfkind. I would make a great addition to Elvish turns of phrase. So when Elrond asks, what are we to do? She's like, the only thing we can do, swim. Stop trying to make that happen. Meanwhile, it looks like they luckily had some of Arundir's magic seats lying around because Halbrand is totes fine. Wandering around Calibramor's workshop where he goes full Jack Skellington in the North Pole. What's this? What's this? He first spots these weird-looking rocks and he's like, I've never seen anything like them. And Calibramor is all like, ah, yes. That is because I, the great Elf Smith Calibramor, have invented plastic. Next Halbrand spots the Mithril. Calibramor tells them they don't have enough and Halbrand is like enough for what? But he doesn't need to hear the answer to that question before coming up with some great ideas. Have you tried combining it with other ores to stretch it and amplify its qualities? And the legendary master, Smith Calibramor, is like, combine with other ores? Mind blown. Meanwhile, back in Numenor, Farazon is in the king's bed chamber standing right in front of the king, talking to some stone masons, telling them that this dude, he's totes about to die. The king is like, brah, I am right here. Farazon continues and tells these stone masons that they will all soon need to forge a tomb of stone, which is when they all realize that he is an imposter because everyone knows you can only forge metals. Next we see Allicent alone with the dying king who begins rambling about something mysterious. Hang on, wrong show. Isildur's sister is sketching the dying king when he grabs her hand and tells her, I know what you've been doing in the dark of night when you thought all eyes were asleep. Damn, you don't gotta call a girl out like that. That's her business. Anyway, she shuts that down real quick, telling him your handmaid will be back in a moment, my king. I don't know if I've had any funny ideas. Just in case though, she goes to try and find a guard, but they've decided to leave this nobody completely 100% alone with the king. I mean, I guess they're understaffed with everyone on the Middle Earth's field trip. King decides to try one more time to convince her though by showing her his man cave. And what does she think of it? Guess we're going to have to stay tuned to find out. Meanwhile, back in Middle Earth, Celebromore suggests making a crown of the Mithril. That way they can cure one person, but a circular form he says is ideal because it will allow the light to arc back upon itself, building in power. Get right up until you stick a head in it. But I think Gilgillad's getting a little bit senile because he responds to this by saying, perilous are these whisperings. Galadriel decides to humor him, going along with it, saying, sometimes the perilous path is the only path. Celebromore lets slip that Hallibrand gave him the idea for the crown, and Gilgillad is pissed that some nobody is telling his master, Smith, what to do. But Celebromore says, his suggestion was but the key that unlocked the dam too soon, bro. Gilgillad then tells him to disband the city. They're all too polite to tell him that disband doesn't mean what he thinks it means. Elrond then begs the king for three more months that he's owed that much. I mean, I'm not sure why he'd be owed. You are owed nothing. I mean, yeah, that's what I thought. Elrond is like, dang it. Okay, well, how about you do it cause I asked real nice, pretty plingies with sugar on top. And then Gandalf says, there was never much hope just to fools, oh sorry, wrong movie again. Gilgillad says, it is a fool's hope. Elrond fires back with hope is never mere, even when it is meager. Oh, no, he didn't. Meanwhile, Galadriel is getting suspicious that even though he had the royal key chain, that dude with the Northern accent might not actually be the king of the Southlands after all. Halbrand comes in all, I can't believe little old me gets to be in this place. Thank you so much, Galadriel. And Galadriel's like, sticks and stones, love. I saved your life, you saved mine, we're square. Halbrand is like, you did way more than save my life and I won't forget it and I'll see to it no one else does either. You know, okay, king of a village that exploded. That means a lot. Meanwhile, back in the forest, the new hires start telling the boss man how powerful he is. And he's like, right on. And starts experimenting with his superpowers. But his new staff is like, whoa, they're jammy and nothing ever that. I mean, you're totally in charge but we're just gonna tie you up, all right? But then his best buds, the Harfoots, create a diversion by making bird noises in a forest. Hearing this unexpected and unlikely sound, his new staff immediately goes to check it out. Or do they? Turns out that Naut Sauron is actually that shape shifter again. But luckily they are totally incapacitated by the all powerful saddock, wrapping his little hard foot arms around his legs. Gotta take him out. So he gets a knife to the gut. Better get him on a horse so he can ride six days and nights so we can get that looked at. Then Naut Sauron takes out two out of the three of them with this big blast of power. Little did he know that one of them can teleport and goes after the Harfoots. Luckily, saddock still has the strength to deal a death blow by stabbing them in the foot. Meanwhile, the shape shifter is about to unleash all hell on their new boss who they totally worship and who is totally in charge when, oh no, they get bumped by a pebble thrown by the Harfoots. Naturally, the only way to take care of this threat is by setting the entire forest on fire. This keeps the shape shifter busy long enough for Naut Sauron to have a lengthy heart to heart which convinces Naut Sauron to help. He says, the dark fire will not avail you, flame of Odun. Go back to the, oh sorry, wrong movie again. Naut Sauron says, from the shadow you came to the shadow I bid you return. I'm good. And then saddock moses on over to a rock and has a seat and is like, well, time to die I guess. The others are like, I mean, you could like carry back maybe get someone to look at that. It's my time to die. Meanwhile, the new Minorians returning from their field trip. Myriel is training for her new life as daredevil, counting her steps. Six, seven, eight. And then sasmaster Elendil comes in with it's nine. Myriel seems concerned about Elendil and suggests he might wanna take bereavement leave after they get back. Cause it looks like the only new Minorian that died was Isildur. Elendil's back to his old tricks, answering questions with complete non sequiturs. You asked me why I pulled Galadriel from the sea. I mean, yeah, it seemed like you were suggesting the sea wasn't right by doing that, which is a big no-no. I claimed to have had little choice, but the truth is I could have left her there. You definitely knew that, my dude. I could have refused to follow her to Middle Earth. You're not sure about that one. I mean, your queen is the one that ordered that, so I guess you could have been a deserter. I could have stopped my son from doing so. Okay, I'll give you that one. I made the choices I did because Elendil does not merely mean one who loves the stars. Oh, oh, what else does it mean? Elendil? What else does it mean? Elendil, I just never imagined it would lead here. What was the original question? Miril goes back on deck when Numenor is in sight, but she's got to keep up the charade that she can still see, so she puts that blindfold right back on. But then, even though neither Elendil nor anybody else says anything or does anything, her spidey senses start tingling. She knows something's up, and is like, Elendil, what is it? What do you see? And we pan over and see that while they were gone, the rest of the Numenorean ships turned pirate. Meanwhile, back in Middle Earth, Nethril makes the oven go boom. Galadriel suggests that they are pushing themselves too hard, and Halbrand goes eureka. The metals shouldn't be forced together, but coaxed. Here, Nethril, Nethril, Nethril, come here, Nethril. That's a good Nethril, come here. A little while later, Galadriel's reviewing the background check she ordered and Halbrand comes to tell her that they've figured it out. They need to make two. That way they can cure two people, two crowns, no, something smaller, necklaces, anklets, bracelets. Come see for yourself, not until you tell me who you really are, and then throws her evidence on the ground where no one can read it. There is no king of the Southlands, but you told me there was. You told me I was him. You lied to me? The last man to have that key chain, he died a thousand years ago. I told you I found it on a dead man. It looks like Galadriel contracted whatever it is that's affecting Gilgallad and Elendil because she responds with, no, on the raft, you saved me. You convinced Meryl to save the men of Middle Earth. Halbrand is starting to get a little bit worried about her mental state and her sanity. Uh, no, that was you. I wanted to stay in Numenor. Galadriel's having none of it. Tell me your name. Not wanting to freak her out. She is clearly losing it. Halbrand uses the me-thrill strategy to coax her back to reality, explaining that he didn't know where the key chain came from. I mean, when she told him that it meant he was king, he wasn't super excited about that idea. He just wanted a simple life as a Smith. But when she insisted that she needed his help, he felt like he'd be letting her down if he did. Oh, just kidding. The master manipulator and deceiver is like, you caught me. I'm totes siren. So you wanna collab bestie? Galadriel starts really freaking out then. I'm not your bestie. Your bestie is Morgoth. Nah, that Morgoth guy is a dick. You deceived me. Girl, when? I straight up told you I did some bad shit and you were like, what ifs help me? Let the past die. So queen, you wanna collab on saving Middle Earth or what? Rule. Both? Both is good. Never. You know I'm an elf supremacist. So Galadriel goes back to Kalebramorn and is like, I kicked that low life Halbrand out. We don't need his kind around here. Kalebramore is like, we still gonna make these rings though? Oh, most definitely. How else are we gonna cure the plague? But this has gotta be for elves alone. But the dwarves have a butt fuck of me thrill. If Halbrand tells them that all they gotta do is mix it with gold or silver, doesn't matter. Also, you gotta make three, cause I want one too. All right. You gotta contribute to this project. How about that sweet dagger your brother gave you? I guess. Meanwhile, the Harfits have got themselves a nice shire going, which naturally means it's time to move on to somewhere less nice. Nori tells not, not Gandalf that she's had enough adventure for a lifetime. But then Nori's family kicks her out and is like, let's get back to adventuring. And Nori's like, yippee, so long suckas. But first she does a secret handshake with her dad. Meanwhile, back with the elf nationalists, they're ready to start using the gold and silver from Galadriel's dagger. No need to separate out those metals. Not when you've got experts. Just chuck the whole thing in the pot. Add in some me-thrilling baby, you got a stew going. But uh-oh, Elrond remembers the random scroll that Galadriel left in the water. He races back to the workshop to ask Galadriel why some family tree was in the water. But he's too late. The super awesome rings of plastic have been completed. The showrunners couldn't decide which would be more epic to zoom in or to zoom out. So they went with both. And lastly, kicked out of the nice elf city for trying to rise above his station. Poor refugee Halbrand is headed back to the Southlands to try to make the best of it. And that's the end of season one. I have so many questions that I need answered immediately. Like what happened with the Southlanders? How are they doing? Did a seal door sister, like the king's man cave, will Nori realize that going off with the perfect stranger and leaving her family behind is not a good idea? Will the scrappy Halbrand and Adar join forces to rise up against the authoritative and oppressive power of the elves? Will Galadriel remember that she has a husband and that she should go look for him? Will all of elf kind die because they only have three rings? Will Disa learn the secret of mixing me-thrill with metal and create rings of plastic for herself so she can rule them all? There are just endless possibilities for where the show could go in season two. And I, for one, am itching to find out what happens next. Let me know in the comments down below how you felt about season one. If you are also dying to know what happens next, let me know your predictions for what will happen. Whatever you want to let me know. I post videos on Saturdays. Other random times will open up on Saturdays, so like and subscribe. Join my Patreon if you feel so inclined and I'll see you when I see you. Bye.