 23 A splendid Midsommah shone over England, skies so pure, suns so radiant as with ends seen in long succession, seldom favour even singly our wave-girt land. It was as if a band of Italian days had come from the south, like a flock of glorious passenger birds, and lighted to rest them on the cliffs of Albion. The hay was all got in, the fields round Thornfield were green and shorn, the roads white and baked, the trees were in their dark prime, hedge and wood full-leaved and deeply tinted, contrasted well with the sunny hue of the cleared meadows between. On Midsommah Eve, Adele, weary with gathering wild strawberries in hay-lane half the day, had gone to bed with the sun. I watched her drop asleep, and when I left her, I sought the garden. It was now the sweetest hour of the twenty-four. Day its fervid fires had wasted, and dew fell cool on panting, plain and scorched summit. Where the sun had gone down in simple state, pure of the pomp of clouds, spread a solemn purple, burning with the light of red jewel and furnace flame at one point, on one hill-peak, and extending high and wide, soft and still softer, over half-heaven. The east had its own charm, or fine deep blue, and its own modest gem, a casino and solitary star. Soon it would boast the moon, but she was yet beneath the horizon. I walked a while on the pavement, but a subtle, well-known scent, that of a cigar, stole from some window. I saw the library casement open to hands-breath. I knew I might be watched thence, so I went apart into the orchard. No nook in the grounds more sheltered and more Eden-like. It was full of trees, it bloomed with flowers—a very high wall shutted out from the court on one side. On the other, a beech avenue screened it from the lawn. At the bottom was a sunk fence. With sole separation from lonely fields, a winding walk, bordered with laurels and terminating in a giant horse-chestnut, circled at the base by a seat, led down to the fence. Here one could wander unseen. While such honey-do-fell, such silence reigned, such gloaming gathered, I felt as if I could haunt such shade for ever. But in threading the flower and fruit-part tears at the upper part of the enclosure, enticed there by the light the now rising moon cast on this more open quarter, my step is stayed, not by sound, not by sight, but once more by a warning fragrance. Sweet briar and southern wood, jasmine, pink and rose, have long been yielding their evening sacrifice of incense. This new scent is neither of shrub nor flower. It is, I know it well. It is Mr. Rochester's cigar. I look round and I listen. I see trees laden with ripening fruit. I hear a nightingale wobbling in a wood half a mile off. No moving form is visible. No coming step audible, but that perfume increases. I must flee. I make for the wicket leading to the shrubbery, and I see Mr. Rochester entering. I step aside into the ivy recess. He will not stay long. He will soon return once he came, and if I sit still he will never see me. But no. Even tide is as pleasant to him as to me, and this antique garden as attractive. And he strolls on, now lifting the goose-free tree branches to look at the fruit, large as plums with which they are laden, now taking a ripe cherry from the wall, now stooping toward a knot of flowers, either to inhale their fragrance or to admire the dew-beads on their petals. A great moth goes humming by me. It alights on a plant at Mr. Rochester's foot. He sees it, and bends to examine it. Now he has his back towards me, thought I, and he is occupied, too, and perhaps if I walk softly I can slip away unnoticed. I trod on an edging of turf that the crackle of the pebbly gravel might not betray me. He was standing among the beds at a yard or two distant from where I had to pass. The moth apparently engaged him. I shall get by very well, I meditated. As I crossed his shadow, thrown long over the garden by the moon, not yet risen high, he said quietly, without turning, Jane, come and look at this fellow. I had made no noise. He had not eyes behind. Could his shadow feel? I started at first, and then I approached him. Look at his wings, said he. He reminds me rather of a West Indian insect. One does not often see so large and gay a knight over in England. There he is flown. The moth roamed away. I was sheepishly retreating also, but Mr. Rochester followed me, and when we reached the wicket, he said, Turn back! On so lovely a night it is a shame to sit in the house, and surely no one can wish to go to bed while sunset is thus at meeting with moonrise. It is one of my faults, that though my tongue is sometimes prompt enough at an answer, there are times when it sadly fails me in framing an excuse, and always the lapse occurs at some crisis, when a facile word or plausible pretext is especially wanted to get me out of painful embarrassment. I did not like to walk at this hour alone with Mr. Rochester and the shadowy orchard, but I could not find a reason to allege for leaving him. I followed with lagging step, and thoughts busily bent on discovering a means of extrication, but he himself looked so composed and so grave also. I became ashamed of feeling any confusion. The evil, if evil existent or prospective there was, seemed to lie with me only. His mind was unconscious and quiet. Jane! he recommended, as we entered the laurel walk, and slowly strayed down in the direction of the sunk fence and the horse-chestnut. Thornfield is a pleasant place in summer, is it not? Yes, sir. You must have become in some degree attached to the house, you who have an eye for natural beauties and a good deal of the organ of adhesiveness. I am attached to it, indeed. And though I don't comprehend how it is, I perceive you have acquired a degree of regard for that foolish little child Adele, too, and even for simple-dame fair-fax. Yes, sir. In different ways I have an affection for both. And would be sorry to part with them. Yes. Pity! he said, and sighed, and paused. It is always the way of events in this life," he continued presently,--"no sooner have you got settled in a pleasing resting place, than a voice calls out to you to rise and move on, for the hour of repose is expired." "'Must I move on, sir?' I asked. "'Must I leave Thornfield?' "'I believe you must, Jane. I am sorry, Janet. But I believe, indeed, you must." This was a blow, but I did not let it prostrate me. "'Well, sir, I shall be ready when the order to march comes. It is come, now. I must give it to-night. And you are going to be married, sir?" "'Exactly. Precisely. With your usual acuteness you have hit the nail straight on the head.' "'Soon, sir.'" "'Very soon, my—that is, Miss Eyre. And you'll remember, Jane, that the first time I, or rumour, plainly intimated to you that it was my intention to put my old bachelor's neck into the sacred noose to enter into the holiest state of matrimony, to take Miss Ingram to my bosom in short, she's an extensive armful, but that's not to the point. One can't have too much of such a very excellent thing as my beautiful blanche. Well, as I was saying, listen to me, Jane, you're not turning your head to look after more moths, are you? That was only a lady-clock child flying away home. I wish to remind you that it was you who first said to me, with that discretion I respect in you, with that foresight, prudence, and humility which befit your responsible and dependent position, that in case I married Miss Ingram, both you and little Adele had better trot forthwith. I pass over the sort of slur conveyed in the suggestion on the character of my beloved. Indeed, when you are far away, Janet, I'll try to forget it. I shall notice only its wisdom, which is such that I have made it my law of action. Adele must go to school, and you, Miss Eyre, must get a new situation. Yes, sir. I will advertise immediately, and meantime, I suppose—I was going to say, I suppose they may stay here, till I find another shelter to be taken myself to. But I stopped, feeling it would not do to risk a long sentence, for my voice was not quite under command. In about a month I hoped to be a bridegroom, continued Mr. Rochester, and in the interim I shall myself look out for employment, and an asylum for you. Thank you, sir. I am sorry to give—oh, no need to apologise. I consider that when the dependent does her duty as well as you have done yours, she has a sort of claim upon her employer for any little assistance he can conveniently render her. Indeed, I have already, through my future mother-in-law, heard of a place that I think will suit. It is to undertake the education of the five daughters of Mrs. Dionysus O'Gall of Bittenut Lodge, Connott, Ireland. You like Ireland, I think? There such warm-hearted people there, they say. It is a long way off, sir. No matter. A girl of your sense will not object to the voyage or the distance. Not the voyage, but the distance. And then the sea is a barrier. From what, Jane? From England, and from Thornfield, and—well—from you, sir. I said this almost involuntarily, and with as little sanction of free will, my tears gushed out. I did not cry so as to be heard, however. I avoided sobbing. The thought of Mrs. O'Gall and Bittenut Lodge struck cold to my heart, and colder the thought of all the brine and foam, destined as it seemed to rush between me and the master at whose side I now walked, and coldest the remembrance of the wider ocean, wealth, caste, custom, intervened between me and what I naturally and inevitably loved. It is a long way, I again said. It is, to be sure. And when you get to Bittenut Lodge, Connott, Ireland, I shall never see you again, Jane. That's morally certain. I never go over to Ireland, not having myself much of a fancy for the country. We have been good friends, Jane, have we not? Yes, sir. And when friends are on the eve of separation, they like to spend the little time that remains to them close to each other. Come! We'll talk over the voyage and the parting quietly half an hour or so, while the stars enter into their shining life up in heaven yonder. Here is the chestnut tree, here is the bench at its old roots. Come! We will sit there in peace to-night, though we should never more be destined to sit there together. He seated me and himself. It is a long way to Ireland, Janet, and I am sorry to send my little friend on such weary travels, but if I can't do better, how is it to be helped? Are you anything akin to me, do you think, Jane? I could risk no sort of answer by this time. My heart was still. Because," he said, I sometimes have a queer feeling with regard to you, especially when you are near me as now. It is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your little frame, and if that boisterous channel, and two hundred miles or so of land come broad between us, I am afraid that cord of communion will be snapped, and then I have a nervous notion I should take to bleeding inwardly. As for you, you'd forget me. That I never should, sir—you know!—impossible to proceed. Jane, do you hear that nightingale singing in the wood? Listen. In listening, I sobbed convulsively, for I could repress what I endured no longer. I was obliged to yield, and I was shaken from head to foot with acute distress. When I did speak, it was only to express an impetuous wish that I had never been born or never come to Thornfield. Because you are sorry to leave it. The vehemence of emotion, stirred by grief and love within me, was claiming mastery and struggling for full sway, and asserting a right to predominate, to overcome, to live, rise, and reign at last, yes, and to speak. I grieve to leave Thornfield. I love Thornfield. I love it, because I have lived in it a full and delightful life—momentarily, at least. I have not been trampled on. I have not been petrified. I have not been buried within farier minds, and excluded from every glimpse of communion with what is bright and energetic and high. I have talked face to face with what I reverence, with what I delight in, with an original, a vigorous, and expanded mind. I have known you, Mr. Rochester, and it strikes me with terror and anguish to feel I absolutely must be torn from you, for ever. I see the necessity of departure, and it is like looking on the necessity of death. "'Where do you see the necessity?' he asked, suddenly. "'Where? You, sir, have placed it before me.' In what shape?' "'In the shape of Miss Ingram, a noble and beautiful woman. Your bride.' "'My bride? What bride?' "'I have no bride.' "'But you will have?' "'Yes, I will. I will,' he said his teeth. "'Then I must go. You have said it yourself.' "'No, you must stay. I swear it, and the oath shall be kept.' "'I tell you, I must go,' I retorted, roused to something like passion. Do you think I can stay to become nothing to you? Do you think I am an automaton, a machine without feelings, and can bear to have my morsel of bread snatched from my lips and my drop of living water dashed from my cup? Do you think, because I am poor, obscure, plain and little, I am soulless and heartless? You think wrong. I have as much soul as you, and full as much heart, and if God had gifted me with some beauty and much wealth, I should have made it as hard for you to leave me as it is now for me to leave you. I am not talking to you now through the medium of custom, conventionalities, or even of mortal flesh. It is my spirit that addresses your spirit, just as if both had passed through the grave, and we stood at God's feet, equal as we are.' "'As we are,' repeated Mr. Rochester. So,' he added, enclosing me in his arms, gathering me to his breast, pressing his lips on my lips. So, Jane. "'Yes, so, sir,' I rejoined, and yet not so, for you are a married man, or as good as a married man, and wed to one inferior to you, to one with whom you have no sympathy, whom I do not believe you truly love, for I have seen and heard you sneer at her. I would scorn such a union. Therefore I am better than you. Let me go!' "'Where, Jane? To Ireland?' "'Yes, to Ireland. I have spoken my mind, and can go anywhere now.' "'Jane, be still. Don't struggle so like a wild frantic bird that is rending its own plumage in its desperation. I am no bird, and no net and snazmy. I am a free human being with an independent will, which I now exert to leave you.' The effort set me at liberty, and I stood erect before him. "'And your will shall decide your destiny,' he said. "'I offer you my hand, my heart, and a share of all my possessions. You play a farce, which I merely laugh at. I ask you to pass through life at my side, to be my second self and best earthly companion. For that fate you have already made your choice, and must abide by it. Jane, be still a few moments. You are overexcited. I will be still, too.' A waft of wind came sweeping down the laurel-walk, and trembled through the bowels of the chestnut. It wandered away, away to an infant distance. It died. The nightingale's song was then the only voice of the hour. In listening to it, I again wept. Mr. Rochester sat quiet, looking at me judbly and seriously. Some time passed before he spoke. He at last said, "'Come to my side, Jane, and let us explain and understand one another. I will never again come to your side. I am torn away now, and cannot return. But Jane, I summon you as my wife. It is you only I intend to marry.' I was silent. I thought he mocked me. "'Come, Jane, come hither. Your bride stands between us.' He rose, and with a stride reached me. "'My bride is here,' he said, again drawing me to him, "'because my equal is here, and my likeness. Jane, will you marry me?' Still I did not answer, and still I writhed myself from his grasp, for I was still incredulous. "'Do you doubt me, Jane?' "'Entirely. You have no faith in me? Not a wit.' "'Am I a liar in your eyes?' He asked passionately. "'Little skeptic, you shall be convinced. What love have I for Miss Ingram? None, and that, you know. What love has she for me? None, as I have taken pains to prove. I caused a rumour to reach her that my fortune was not a third of what was supposed, and after that I presented myself to see the result. It was coldness both from her and her mother. I would not. I could not marry Miss Ingram. You, you strange, you almost unearthly thing, I love as my own flesh. You, poor and obscure, and small and plain as you are, I entreat to accept me as a husband. "'What? Me?' I ejaculated, beginning in his earnestness, and especially in his incivility, to credit his sincerity. "'Me, who have not a friend in the world but you, if you are, my friend? Not a shilling, but what you have given me?' "'You, Jane, I must have you for my own—entirely my own. Will you be mine? Say yes, quickly.' "'Mr. Rochester, let me look at your face. Turn to the moonlight.' "'Why?' "'Because I want to read your countenance. Turn.' "'There. You will find it scarcely more legible than a crumpled, scratched page. Read on. Only make haste, for I suffer.' His face was very much agitated and very much flushed, and there were strong workings in the features and strange gleams in the eyes. "'Oh, Jane, you torture me,' he exclaimed, with that searching and yet faithful and generous look, you torture me. "'How can I do that? If you are true and you're off or real, my only feelings to you must be gratitude and devotion. They cannot torture.' "'Gratitude,' he ejaculated, and added wildly, "'Jane, accept me quickly. Say, Edward, give me my name. Edward, I will marry you.' "'Are you an earnest? Do you truly love me? Do you sincerely wish me to be your wife?' "'I do, and if an oath is necessary to satisfy you, I swear it.' "'Then, sir, I will marry you.' "'Edward, my little wife, "'Dear Edward, come to me. Come to me entirely now,' said he. And added in his deepest tone, speaking in my ear as his cheek was laid on mine, "'Make my happiness. I will make yours.' "'God pardon me.' He so joined ere long. And man meddle not with me. I have her, and will hold her.' "'There is no one to meddle, sir. I have no kindred to interfere.' "'No, that is the best of it,' he said. And if I had loved him less, I should have thought his accent and look of exaltation's savage. But sitting by him, roused from the nightmare of parting, called to the paradise of union, I thought only of the bliss given me to drink, and so abundant a flow. Again and again, he said, "'Are you happy, Jane?' And again and again I answered, "'Yes!' After which he murmured, "'It will atone. It will atone. Have I not found her friendless, cold, and comfortless? Will I not guard and cherish and solace her? Is there not love in my heart and constancy in my resolves? It will expiate at God's tribunal. I know my maker sanctions what I do. For the world's judgment I wash my hands thereof. For man's opinion I defy it.' But what had befallen the night? The moon was not yet set, and we were all in shadow. I could scarcely see my master's face near as I was. And what ailed the chestnut tree? It writhed and groaned, while wind roared in the laurel-walk, and came sweeping over us. "'We must go in,' said Mr. Rochester. The weather changes. I could have sat with thee till morning, Jane. And so thought I, could I with you? I should have said so, perhaps, but a livid, vivid spark leapt out of a cloud at which I was looking, and there was a crack, a crash, and a close rattling peel, and I thought only of hiding my dazzled eyes against Mr. Rochester's shoulder. The rain rushed down. He hurried me up the walk through the grounds and into the house, but we were quite wet before we could pass the threshold. He was taking off my shawl in the hall, and shaking the water out of my loosened hair, when Mrs. Fairfax emerged from her room. I did not observe her at first, nor did Mr. Rochester. The lamp was lit. The clock was on the stroke of twelve. "'Hasten, to take off your wet things,' said he, and before you go, good night. Good night, my darling.' He kissed me repeatedly. When I looked up, unleaving his arms, there stood the widow, pale, grave, and amazed. I only smiled at her and ran upstairs. Explanation will do for another time, thought I. Still, when I reached my chamber, I felt a pang at the idea she should even temporarily misconstrue what she had seen. But joy soon effaced every other feeling, and loud as the wind blew, near and deep as the thunder crashed, fierce and frequent as the lightning gleamed, cataract like as the rain fell during a storm of two hours' duration, I experienced no fear and little awe. Mr. Rochester came thrice to my door in the course of it, to ask if I was safe and tranquil, and that was comfort, that was strength for anything. Before I left my bed in the morning, little Adele came running in to tell me that the great horse Chesnut, at the bottom of the orchard, had been struck by lightning in the night, and half of it split away. CHAPTER XXIV of Jane Eyre. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information, or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Coming by Elizabeth Clutt. Jane Eyre, by Charlotte Bronte. CHAPTER XXIV As I rose and dressed, I thought over what had happened, and wondered if it were a dream. I could not be certain of the reality till I had seen Mr. Rochester again, and heard him renew his words of love and promise. While arranging my hair, I looked at my face in the glass, and felt it was no longer plain. There was hope in its aspect, and life in its colour, and my eyes seemed as if they had beheld the fount of fruition, and borrowed beams from the lustrous ripple. I had often been unwilling to look at my master, because I feared he could not be pleased at my look. But I was sure I might lift my face to his now, and not cool his affection by its expression. I took a plain but clean and light some address from my drawer, and put it on. It seemed no attire had ever so well become me, because none had I ever worn in so blissful a mood. I was not surprised, when I ran down into the hall, to see that a brilliant June morning had succeeded to the tempest of the night, and to feel through the open glass door, the breathing of a fresh and fragrant breeze. Nature must be gladsome when I was so happy. A beggar woman and her little boy, pale ragged objects both, were coming up the walk, and I ran down and gave them all the money I happened to have in my purse, some three or four shillings—good or bad, they must partake of my jubilee. The rook's cord and blither-bird's sang, but nothing was so merry or so musical as my own rejoicing heart. Mrs. Fairfax surprised me by looking out of the window with a sad countenance, and saying gravely, "'Miss Air, will you come to breakfast?' During the meal she was quiet and cool, but I could not un-deceive her then. I must wait for my master to give explanations, and so must she. I ate what I could, and then I hastened upstairs. I met Adele, leaving the schoolroom. Where are you going? It is time for lessons. Mr. Rochester has sent me away to the nursery. Where is he? In there,' pointing to the apartment she had left, and I went in, and there he stood. "'Come and bid me good morning,' said he. I gladly advanced, and it was not merely a cold word now, or even a shake of the hand that I received, but an embrace and a kiss. It seemed natural. It seemed genial to be so well loved, so caressed by him. "'Jane, you look blooming and smiling and pretty,' said he, truly pretty this morning. Is this my pale little elf? Is this my mustard-seed? This little sunny-faced girl with the dimpled cheek and rosy lips, the satin smooth hazel hair and the radiant hazel eyes? I had green eyes, reader, but you must excuse the mistake. For him they were new-dyed, I suppose. "'It is Jane Ayre, sir.' "'Soon to be Jane Rochester,' he added. "'In four weeks, Janet, not a day more, do you hear that?' "'I did, and I could not quite comprehend it. It made me giddy. The feeling, the announcement sent through me, was something stronger than was consistent with joy, something that smote and stunned. It was, I think, almost fear.' "'You blushed, and now you are white, Jane. What is that for?' "'Because you gave me a new name, Jane Rochester. And it seems so strange.' "'Yes, Mrs. Rochester,' said he, young Mrs. Rochester, fair facts Rochester's girl-bride. "'It can never be, sir. It does not sound likely. Human beings never enjoy complete happiness in this world. I was not born for a different destiny to the rest of my species. To imagine such a lot befalling me is a fairy-tale, a daydream. Which I can and will realize. I shall begin to-day. This morning I wrote to my banker and London to send me certain jewels he has in his keeping, heirlooms for the ladies of Thornfield. In a day or two I hope to pour them into your lap, for every privilege, every attention shall be yours that I would accord a peer's daughter, if about to marry her.' "'Oh, sir! Never rain jewels. I don't like to hear them spoken of. Jewels for Jane Eyre sounds unnatural and strange. I would rather not have them. I will myself put the diamond chain round your neck and the circlet on your forehead. Which it will become, for nature, at least, has stamped her patent of nobility on this brow, Jane. And I will clasp the bracelets on these fine wrists and load these fairy-like fingers with rings.' "'No, no, sir. Think of other subjects and speak of other things, and in another strain. Don't address me as if I were a beauty. I am your plain, quakerish governess. You are a beauty in my eyes, and a beauty just after the desire of my heart, delicate and aerial. Puny and insignificant, you mean. You are dreaming, sir, or you are sneering. For God's sake, don't be ironical. I will make the world acknowledge you a beauty, too,' he went on, while I really became uneasy at the strain he had adopted, because I felt he was either deluding himself or trying to delude me. I will attire my Jane in satin and lace, and she shall have roses in her hair, and I will cover the head I love best with a priceless veil. And then you won't know me, sir, and I shall not be your Jane Eyre and Ylonga, but an ape in a harlequin's jacket, a jay in borrowed plumes. I would as soon see you, Mr. Rochester, tricked out in stage trappings, as myself clad in a court lady's robe, and I don't call you handsome, sir, though I love you most dearly, far too dearly to flatter you. Don't flatter me." He pursued his theme, however, without noticing my deprecation. "'This very day I shall take you in the carriage to Milcott, and you must choose some dresses for yourself. I told you we shall be married in four weeks. The wedding is to take place quietly in the church down below Yonder, and then I shall waft you away at once to town. After a brief stay there, I shall bear my treasure to regions nearer the sun, to French vineyards and Italian plains, and she shall see whatever is famous in old story in modern record. She shall taste, too, of the life of cities, and she shall learn to value herself by just comparison with others. Shall I travel? And with you, sir? You shall sojourn at Paris, Rome, and Naples, at Florence, Venice, and Vienna. All the ground I have wandered over shall be re-trodden by you. Wherever I have stamped my hoof, your silph's foot shall step also. Ten years since I flew through Euripath mad with disgust, hate, and rage as my companions. Now I shall revisit it, healed and cleansed, with a very angel as my comforter." I laughed at him as he said this. I am not an angel, I asserted, and I will not be one till I die. I will be myself. Mr. Rochester, you must neither expect nor exact anything celestial of me, for you will not get it any more than I shall get it of you, which I do not at all anticipate. What do you anticipate of me? For a little while you will perhaps be as you are now, a very little while, and then you will turn cool, and then you will be capricious, and then you will be stern, and I shall have much adieu to please you. But when you get well used to me, you will perhaps like me again. Like me, I say, not love me. I suppose your love will effervesce in six months or less. I have observed in books written by men that period assigned as the farthest to which a husband's ardour extends. Yet after all, as a friend and companion, I hope never to become quite distasteful to my dear master. Distasteful, and like you again! I think I shall like you again, and yet again, and I will make you confess I do not only like, but love you, with truth, fervour, constancy. Yet are you not capricious, sir? To women who please me only by their faces, I am the very devil when I find out they have neither souls nor hearts, when they open to me a perspective of flatness, reality, and perhaps imbecility, coarseness, and ill-temper. But to the clear eye and eloquent tongue, to the soul made of fire and the character that bends, but does not break, at once supple and stable, tractable and consistent, I am ever tender and true. Had you ever experience of such a character, sir? Did you ever love such a one? I love it now. But before me, if I indeed, in any respect, come up to your difficult standard. I never met your likeness. Jane, you please me, and you master me. You seem to submit, and I like the sense of pliancy you impart, and while I am twining the soft silken skein round my finger, it sends a thrill that my arm to my heart. I am influenced, conquered, and the influence is sweeter than I can express, and the conquest I undergo has a witchery beyond any triumph I can win. Why do you smile, Jane? What does that inexplicable, that uncanny turn of countenance mean? I was thinking, sir, you will excuse the idea it was involuntary. I was thinking of Hercules and Samson with their charmers. You were, you little elfish, hush, sir! You don't talk very wisely just now, any more than those gentlemen acted very wisely. However, had they been married, they would no doubt by their severity as husbands have made up for their softness his suitors, and so will you, I fear. I wonder how you will answer me a year hence, should I ask a favour it does not suit your convenience or pleasure to grant? Ask me something now, Jane, the least thing, I desire to be entreated. Indeed I will, sir, I have my petition all ready. Speak! But if you look up and smile with that countenance, I shall swear concession before I know to what, and that will make a fool of me. Not at all, sir. I only ask this. Don't send for the jewels, and don't crown me with roses. You might as well put a border of gold lace round that plain pocket-hankerchief you have there. I might as well gild refined gold. I know it. Your request is granted, then, for the time. I will remand the order I dispatched to my banker. But you have not yet asked for anything. You have prayed a gift be withdrawn. Try again. Well, then, sir, have the goodness to gratify my curiosity, which is much peaked on one point. He looked disturbed. What? What? He said hastily. Curiosity is a dangerous petition. It is well I have not taken a vow to accord every request. But there can be no danger in complying with this, sir. Utter it, Jane! But I wish that instead of a mere inquiry and two, perhaps, a secret, it was a wish for half my estate. Now, King Ahasuerus, what do I want with half your estate? Do you think I am a Jew user, a sinking good investment in land? I would much rather have all your confidence. You will not exclude me from your confidence, if you will admit me to your heart. You are welcome to all my confidence that is worth having, Jane. But for God's sake, don't desire a useless burden. Don't long for poison. Don't turn out a downright eave on my hands. Why not, sir? You have just been telling me how much you like to be conquered, and how pleasant over persuasion is to you. Don't you think I had better take advantage of the confession, and begin, and coax, and entreat, even cry, and be sulky if necessary, for the sake of a mere assay of my power? I dare you to any such experiment. Then croach, presume, and the game is up. Is it, sir? You soon give in. How stern you look now! Your eyebrows have become as thick as my finger, and your forehead resembles what, in some very astonishing poetry, I once saw styled, a blue-piled thunderloft. That will be your married look, I suppose. If that will be your married look, I, as a Christian, will soon give up the notion of consorting with a mere sprite or salamander. But what had you to ask, thing? Out with it. There, you are less than civil now, and I like rudeness a great deal better than flattery. I had rather be a thing than an angel. This is what I have to ask. Why did you take such pains to make me believe you wish to marry Miss Ingram? Is that all? Thank God it is no worse! And now he unknit his black brows, looked down, smiling at me, and stroked my hair as if well pleased at seeing a danger averted. I think I may confess," he continued,—even although I should make you a little indignant, Jane, and I have seen what a fire-spirit you can be when you are indignant. You glowed in the cool moonlight last night when you mutinied against fate, and claimed your rank is my equal. Janet, by the by, it was you who made me the offer. Of course I did. But to the point of you please, sir, Miss Ingram. Well, I feigned courtship of Miss Ingram, because I wished to render you as madly in love with me as I was with you, and I knew jealousy would be the best ally I could call in for the furtherance of that end. Excellent! Now you are small, not one whit bigger than the end of my little finger. It was a burning shame and a scandalous disgrace to act in that way. Did you think nothing of Miss Ingram's feelings, sir? Her feelings are concentrated in one—pride—and that needs humbling. Were you jealous, Jane? Never mind, Mr. Rochester, it is in no way interesting to you to know that. Answer me truly once more. Do you think Miss Ingram will not suffer from your dishonest coquetry? Won't she feel forsaken and deserted? Impossible! When I told you how she, on the contrary, deserted me, the idea of my insolvency cooled or rather extinguished her flame in a moment. You have a curious designing mind, Mr. Rochester. I am afraid your principles on some points are eccentric. My principles were never trained, Jane. They may have grown a little awry for want of attention. Once again, seriously, may I enjoy the great good that has been vouched safe to me, without fearing that any one else is suffering the bitter pain I myself felt a while ago? That you may, my good little girl, there is not another being in the world has the same pure love for me as yourself, for I lay that pleasant unction to my soul, Jane, a belief in your affection. I turned my lips to the hand that lay on my shoulder. I loved him very much, more than I could trust myself to say, more than words had power to express. Ask something more," he said presently, it is my delight to be entreated, and to yield. I was again ready with my request. Communicate your intentions to Mrs. Fairfax, sir. She saw me with you last night in the hall, and she was shocked. Give her some explanation before I see her again. It pains me to be misjudged by so good a woman. Go to your room and put on your bonnet," he replied. I mean you to accompany me to milk it this morning, and while you prepare for the drive I will enlighten the old lady's understanding. Did she think, Janet, you had given the world for love and considered it well lost? I believe she thought I had forgotten my station, and yours, sir. Station! Station! Your station is in my heart, and on the necks of those who would insult you now or hereafter. Go! I was soon dressed, and when I heard Mr. Rochester quit Mrs. Fairfax's parlour, I hurried down to it. The old lady had been reading her morning portion of scripture, the lesson for the day. Her Bible lay open before her, and her spectacles were upon it. Her occupation, suspended by Mr. Rochester's announcement, seemed now forgotten. Her eyes fixed on the blank wall opposite. Expressed the surprise of a quiet mind stirred by unwonted tidings. Seeing me, she roused herself. She made a sort of effort to smile and framed a few words of congratulation. But the smile expired, and the sentence was abandoned, unfinished. She put up her spectacles, shut the Bible, and pushed her chair back from the table. I feel so astonished! She began. I hardly know what to say to you, Miss Fair. I have surely not been dreaming, have I? Sometimes I have fall asleep when I am sitting alone in fancy things that have never happened. It has seemed to me more than once when I have been in a dose that my dear husband, who died fifteen years since, has come in and sat down beside me, and that I have even heard him call me by my name, Alice, as he used to do. Now can you tell me whether it is actually true that Mr. Rochester is asked you to marry him? Don't laugh at me. But I really thought he came in here five minutes ago, and said that in a month you would be his wife. He has said the same thing to me, I replied. He has? Do you believe him? Have you accepted him? Yes. She looked at me bewildered. I could never have thought it. He is a proud man. All the Rochester's were proud, and his father at least liked money. He too has always been called careful. He means to marry you. He tells me so. She surveyed my whole person. In her eyes I read that they had there found no charm powerful enough to solve the enigma. It passes me," she continued, but no doubt it is true since you say so. How it will answer I cannot tell. I really don't know. Equality of position and fortune is often advisable in such cases, and there are twenty years of difference in your ages. He might almost be your father. No indeed, Mrs. Fairfax, exclaimed I, netled, he is nothing like my father. No one who saw us together would suppose it for an instant. Mr. Rochester looks as young and is as young as some men at five and twenty. Is it really for love he is going to marry you? She asked. I was so hurt by her coldness and skepticism that the tears rose to my eyes. I am sorry to grieve you," pursued the widow, but you are so young and so little acquainted with men, I wish to put you on your guard. It is an old saying that all is not gold that glitters, and in this case I do fear there will be something found to be different to what either you or I expect. Why? Am I a monster?" I said. Is it impossible that Mr. Rochester should have a sincere affection for me? No, you are very well, and much improved of late, and Mr. Rochester I dare say is fond of you. I have always noticed that you were a sort of pet of his. There are times when, for your sake, I have been a little uneasy at his marked preference, and have wished to put you on your guard, but I did not like to suggest even the possibility of wrong. I knew such an idea would shock, perhaps offend you, and you were so discreet and so thoroughly modest and sensible, I hoped you might be trusted to protect yourself. Last night I cannot tell you what I suffered when I sought all over the house and confined you nowhere, nor the master either, and then at twelve o'clock saw you come in with him. Well, never mind that now," I interrupted impatiently. It is enough that all was right. I hope all will be right in the end," she said, but believe me, you cannot be too careful. Try and keep Mr. Rochester at a distance. Distrust yourself as well as him. Gentlemen in his station are not accustomed to marry their governesses." I was growing truly irritated. Happily Adele ran in. "'Let me go—let me go to Milka, too,' she cried. "'Mr. Rochester, won't—so there is so much room in the new carriage? Make him to let me go, memoiselle.'" That I will, Adele, and I hastened away with her, glad to quit my gloomy monitress. The carriage was ready, they were bringing it round to the front, and my master was pacing the pavement, pilot following him backwards and forwards. Adele may accompany us, may she not, sir. I told her no—I'll have no brats—I'll have only you. I'll do let her go, Mr. Rochester, if you please, it would be better. Not it! She will be a restraint." He was quite peremptory, both in look and voice. The chill of Mrs. Fairfax's warnings and the damp of her doubts were upon me—something of unsubstantiality and uncertainty he had beset my hopes. I half lost the sense of power over him. I was about mechanically to obey him without further a monstrance, but as he helped me into the carriage, he looked at my face. "'What is the matter?' he said. "'All the sunshine is gone. Do you really wish the band to go? Will it annoy you if she is left behind?' "'I would far rather she went, sir.' "'Then offer your bonnet and back like a flash of lightning,' cried he to Adele. She obeyed him with what speed she might. "'After all, a single morning's interruption will not matter much,' said he. "'When I mean shortly to claim you, your thoughts, conversation, and company, for life.'" Adele, when lifted in, commenced kissing me by way of expressing her gratitude for my intercession, she was instantly stowed away into a corner on the other side of him. She then peeped round to where I sat, so stern a neighbour was too restrictive to him, in his present fractious mood. She dared whisper no observations, nor ask of him any information. "'Let her come to me,' I entreated. "'She will perhaps trouble you, sir. There is plenty of room on this side.' He handed her over as if she had been a lap dog. "'I'll send her to school yet,' he said. But now,' he was smiling. Adele heard him, and asked if she was to go to school. "'Son, Manmuezelle?' "'Yes,' he replied. "'Absolutely, sir, Manmuezelle. For I am to take Manmuezelle to the moon, and there I shall seek a cave in one of the white valleys among the volcano-tops, and Manmuezelle shall live with me there, and only me.' "'She will have nothing to eat. You will starve her,' observed Adele. "'I shall gather manna for her morning and night. The plains and hillsides and the moon are bleached with manna,' Adele. "'She will want to warm herself. What will she do for a fire?' Fire rises out of the lunar mountains. When she is cold, I'll carry her up to a peak, and lay her down on the edge of Crater. "'Oh, Kelly, sir, I'm all—pun-comfortable. And her clothes, they will wear out. How can she get new ones?' Mr. Rochester professed to be puzzled. "'Home,' said he, "'what would you do, Adele? Fill your brains for an expedient. How would a white or pink cloud answer for a gown, do you think? And one could cut a pretty enough scarf out of a rainbow?' "'She is far better as she is,' concluded Adele, after musing some time. "'Besides, she would get tired of living with you only in the moon. If I were Manmuezelle, I would never consent to go with you.' She has consented. She has pledged her word. "'But you can't get as they are. There is no road to the moon. It is all air, and neither you know she can fly.' Adele, look at that field." We were now outside Thornfield Gates, and bowling lightly along the smooth road to Milquitt, where the dust was well laid by the thunderstorm, and where the low hedges in lofty timber-trees on each side glistened green and rain refreshed. In that field, Adele, I was walking late one evening about a fortnight since. The evening of the day you helped me to make hay in the orchard meadows, and as I was tired with raking swaths, I sat down to rest me on a stile, and there I took out a little book and pencil, and began to write about a misfortune that befell me long ago, and a wish I had for happy days to come. I was riding away very fast, though daylight was fading from the leaf, when something came up the path and stopped two yards off me. I looked at it. It was a little thing with a veil of gossamer on its head. I beckoned it to come near me. It soon stood at my knee. I never spoke to it, and it never spoke to me, in words. But I read its eyes, and it read mine, and our speechless colloquy was to this effect. It was a fairy, and come from Elfland, it said, and its errand was to make me happy. I must go with it out of the common world to a lonely place, such as the moon, for instance, and it nodded its head towards a horn rising over Hay Hill. It told me of the alabaster cave and silver veer where we might live. I said I should like to go, but reminded it, as you did me, that I had no wings to fly. Oh! returned the fairy, that does not signify. Here is a talisman that will remove all difficulties, and she held out a pretty gold ring. Put it, she said, on the fourth finger of my left hand, and I am yours and you are mine, and we shall leave earth and make our own heaven yonder. She nodded again at the moon. The ring, Adele, is in my breecher's pocket, under the disguise of a sovereign, but I mean soon to change it to a ring again. But what has Manuel Zell to do with it? I don't care for the fairy. You said it was Manuel Zell you would take to the moon. Manuel Zell is a fairy, he said, whispering mysteriously, whereupon I told her not to mind his badenage, and she on her part evinced a fund of genuine French skepticism, denominating Mr. Rochester, un vrai monteur, and assuring him that she made no account whatever of his con de fait, and that, du reste il n'y avait pas de fait et con même il y en avait, she was sure they would never appear to him, nor ever give him rings or offer to live with him in the moon. The hour spent at Milcote was a somewhat harassing one to me. Mr. Rochester obliged me to go to a certain silk-warehouse, there I was ordered to choose half a dozen dresses. I hated the business, I begged leave to defer it. No, it should be gone through with now. By dint of entreaties expressed in energetic whispers, I reduced the half-dozen to two. These, however, he vowed he would select himself. With anxiety I watched his eye rove over the gay stalls. He fixed on a rich silk of the most brilliant amethyst dye, and a superb pink satin. I told him in a new series of whispers that he might as well buy me a gold gown and a silver bonnet at once, I should certainly never venture to wear his choice. With infinite difficulty, for he was stubborn as a stone, I persuaded him to make an exchange in favour of a sober black satin and a pearl-grace silk. It might pass for the present, he said, but he would yet see me glittering like a parterre. Glad was I to get him out of the silk-warehouse, and then out of a jeweler's shop. The more he bought me, the more my cheek burned with a sense of annoyance and degradation. As we re-entered the carriage, and I sat back feverish and fagged, I remembered what in the hurry of events, dark and bright, I had wholly forgotten—the letter of my uncle, John Eyre, to Mrs. Reed—his intention to adopt me and make me his legatee. It would be a relief, indeed, I thought, if I had ever so small an independency, I could never bear being dressed like a doll by Mr. Rochester, or sitting like a second danaye with the golden shower folding daily round me. I would write to Madeira the moment I get home, and tell my uncle John I am going to be married and to whom. If I had but a prospect of one day bringing Mr. Rochester an accession of fortune, I could better endure to be kept by him now. And somewhat relieved by this idea, which I failed not to execute that day, I ventured once more to meet my masters and lovers' eye, which most pertinaciously sought mine, though I averted both face and gaze. He smiled, and I thought his smile was such as a sultan might, in a blissful and fond moment, bestow on a slave his golden gems had enriched. I crushed his hand, which was ever hunting mine vigorously, and thrust it back to him red with the passionate pressure. "'You need not look in that way,' I said. "'If you do, I'll wear nothing but my old low wood frocks to the end of the chapter. I'll be married in this lilac gingham. You may make a dressing-gown for yourself out of the pearl-grace silk, and an infinite series of waist-cuts out of the black satin.' He chuckled. He rubbed his hands. "'Oh, it is rich to see and hear her,' he exclaimed. "'Is she original? Is she peacant? I would not exchange this one little English girl for the grand turk's whole soraleo, gazelle eyes, or reforms and all.' The eastern illusion bit me again. "'I'll not stand you an inch in the stead of a soraleo,' I said, so don't consider me an equivalent for one. If you have a fancy for anything in that line, away with you, sir, to the bazaars of Stamble, without delay, and lay out an extensive slave-pertises, some of that spare cash you seem at a loss to spend satisfactorily here. And what will you do, Janet, while I am bargaining for so many tons of flesh, and such an assortment of black eyes? I'll be preparing myself to go out as a missionary, to preach liberty to them that are enslaved, your harem inmates among the rest. I'll get admitted there, and I'll stir up mutiny. And you, three-tailed Bashor, as you are, sir, shall in a trice find yourself fettered amongst our hands, nor will I, for one, consent to cut your bonds till you have signed Charter, the most liberal that desperate ever yet conferred. I would consent to be at your mercy, Jane. I would have no mercy, Mr. Rochester, if you supplicated for it with an eye like that. While you looked so, I should be certain that whatever Charter you might grant under coercion, your first act, when released, would be to violate its conditions. Why, Jane, what would you have? I fear you will compel me to go through a private marriage ceremony, besides that performed at the altar. You will stipulate, I see, for peculiar terms, what will they be? I only want an easy mind, sir, not crushed by crowded obligations. Do you remember what you said of Celine Varen, of the diamonds the cashmere's you gave her? I will not be your English, Celine Varen. I shall continue to act as Adele's governess. By that I shall earn my board and lodging, and thirty pounds a year, besides. I'll furnish my own wardrobe out of that money, and you shall give me nothing but—well, but what? Your regard. And if I give you mine in return, that debt will be quit. Well, for cool native impudence, and pure innate pride, you haven't your equal, said he. We were now approaching Thornfield. Will it please you to dine with me to-day? He asked as we entered the gates. No thank you, sir. And what for no thank you, if one may inquire? I never have dined with you, sir, and I see no reason why I should now, till—till what?—you delight in half-phrases—till I can't help it. Do you suppose I eat like an ogre, or a ghoul, that you dread of being the companion of my repast? I have formed no supposition on the subject, sir, but I want to go on as usual for another month. You will give up your governessing slavery at once. Indeed, begging your pardon, sir, I shall not. I shall just go on with it as usual. I shall keep out of your way all day, as I have been accustomed to do. You may send for me in the evening, when you feel disposed to see me, and I'll come then, but at no other time. I want to smoke, Jane, or a pinch of snuff, to comfort me and rule this. Poor Madonna and Contenol, says Adele, would say, and unfortunately I have neither my cigar-case nor my snuff-box. But listen! Whisper! It is your time now, little tyrant, but it will be mine presently, and one once I have fairly seized you, to have and to hold, I'll just, figuratively speaking, attach you to a chain like this—touching his watch-guard—yes, we bonny thing, I'll wear you in my bosom, lest my jewel I should tine. He said this as he helped me to a light from the carriage, and while he afterwards lifted out Adele, I entered the house, and made good my retreat upstairs. He duly summoned me to his presence in the evening. I had prepared an occupation for him, for I was determined not to spend the whole time in tet-hautet conversation. I remembered his fine voice. I knew he liked to sing, good singers generally do. I was no vocalist myself, and in his fastidious judgment no musician either. But I delighted in listening when the performance was good. No sooner had twilight that hour of romance began to lower her blue and starry banner over the lattice, than I rose, opened the piano, and entreated him for the love of heaven to give me a song. He said I was a capricious witch, and that he would rather sing another time, but I averred that no time was like the present. "'Did I like his voice?' he asked. "'Very much. I was not fond of pampering that susceptible vanity of his, but for once, and from motives of expediency, I would e'en soothe and stimulate it. "'Then, Jane, you must play the accompaniment.' "'Very well, sir. I will try.' I did try, but was presently swept off the stool and denominated a little bungler. Being pushed unceremoniously to one side, which was precisely what I wished, he usurped my place, and proceeded to accompany himself, for he could play as well as sing. I hide me to the window recess, and while I sat there and looked out at the still trees and dim lawn, to his sweet air was sung in mellow tones the following strain. The truest love that ever heart felt at its kindled core, did through each vein in quickened start the tide of being poor. Her coming was my hope each day, her parting was my pain. The chance that did her steps delay was ice in every vein. I dreamed it would be nameless bliss, as I loved, loved to be, and to this object did I press as blind as eagerly. But wide as pathless was the space that lay our lives between, and dangerous as the foamy race of ocean surges green, and haunted as a robber-path through wilderness or wood, for might and right and woe and wrath between our spirits stood. I dangers dared, I hindrance scorned, I omens did defy. For menest harassed warned I passed impetuous by. On sped my rainbow fast as light, I flew as in a dream, for glorious rose upon my sight that child of shower and gleam. Still bright on clouds of suffering dim shines that soft solemn joy, nor care I now how dense and grim disasters gather nigh. I care not in this moment sweet, though all I have rushed o'er, should come on pinion strong and fleet proclaiming vengeance soar. Though haughty hate should strike me down, right bar approach to me, and grinding might with furious frown swear endless enmity. My love has placed a little hand with noble faith in mine, and vowed that wedlock's sacred band our nature shall entwine. My love has sworn with sealing kiss with me to live to die. I have at last my nameless bliss, as I loved, loved, am I. He rose and came towards me, and I saw his face all kindled, and his full, falken eye flashing, and tenderness and passion in every lineament. I quailed momentarily, and then I rallied. Soft scene, daring demonstration I would not have, and I stood in peril of both. A weapon of defence must be prepared. I whetted my tongue, as he reached me, I asked with asperity, whom he was going to marry now. That was a strange question to be put by his darling Jane. Indeed! I considered it a very natural and necessary one. He had talked of his future wife dying with him. What did he mean by such a pagan idea? I had no intention of dying with him. He might depend on that. Though all he longed, all he prayed for was I might live with him. Death was not for such as I. Indeed it was. I had as good a right to die when my time came as he had, but I should bide that time and not be hurried away in a sutty. Would I forgive him for the selfish idea and prove my pardon by a reconciling kiss? No. I would rather be excused. Here I heard myself apostrophised as a hard little thing, and it was added, any other woman would have been melted to marrow at hearing such a stand as crooned in her praise. I assured him I was naturally hard, very flinty, and that he would often find me so. And that, moreover, I was determined to show him diverse rugged points in my character before the ensuing four weeks collapsed. He should know fully what sort of a bargain he had made, while there was yet time to rescind it. Would I be quiet and talk rationally? I would be quiet, if he liked, and as to talking rationally, I flattered myself I was doing that now. He fretted, pished, and persured. Very good, thought I. You may fume and fidget as you please, but this is the best plan to pursue with you, I am sure. I like you more than I can say, but I'll not sink into a bathos of sentiment, and with this needle of repartee I'll keep you from the edge of the gulf, too. And moreover, maintain by its pungent aid that distance between you and myself most conducive to our real mutual advantage. From less to more I worked him up to considerable irritation. Then after he had retired, in Dudgeon, quite to the other end of the room, I got up, and saying, I wish you good night, sir, in my natural and won'ted respectful manner, I slipped out by the side door and got away. The system thus entered on, I pursued during the whole season of probation, and with the best success, he was kept to be sure rather cross and crusty, but on the whole I could see he was excellently entertained, and that a lamb-like submission and turtledove sensibility, while fostering his despotism more, would have pleased his judgment, satisfied his common sense, and even suited his taste less. In other people's presence I was, as formerly deferential and quiet, any other line of conduct being uncalled for. It was only in the evening conferences I thus thwarted and afflicted him. He continued to send for me punctually the moment the clock struck seven, though when I appeared before him now he had no such honeyed terms as love and darling on his lips. The best words at my service were, provoking puppet, malicious elf, sprite, changeling, etc. For caresses too I now got grimaces, for a pressure of the hand, a pinch on the arm, for a kiss on the cheek, a severe tweak of the air. It was all right. At present I decidedly preferred these fierce favours to anything more tender. As fairfax I saw approved me, her anxiety on my account vanished, therefore I was certain I did well. Meantime, Mr. Rochester affirmed I was wearing him to skin and bone, and threatened awful vengeance for my present conduct at some period fast coming. I laughed in my sleeve at his menaces. I can keep you in reasonable check now, I reflected, and I don't doubt be able to do it hereafter. If one expedient loses its virtue, another must be devised. But after all, my task was not an easy one. Often I would rather have pleased than teased him. My future husband was becoming to me my whole world, and more than the world. Almost my hope of heaven. He stood between me and every thought of religion, as an eclipse into veins between man and the broad sun. I could not, in those days, see God for his creature, of whom I had made an idol. CHAPTER XXV The month of courtship had wasted. Its very last hours were being numbered. There was no putting off the day that advanced, the bridal day, and all preparations for its arrival were complete. I at least had nothing more to do. There were my trunks, packed, locked, corded, ranged in a row along the wall of my little chamber. Tomorrow at this time they would be far on their road to London. And so should I, or rather not I, but one Jane Rochester, a person whom as yet I knew not. The cards of address alone remained to nail on. They lay, at four little squares, in the drawer. Mr. Rochester had himself written the direction. Mrs. Rochester, blank hotel, London, on each. I could not persuade myself to affix them, or to have them affixed. Mrs. Rochester! She did not exist. She would not be born till to-morrow, some time after eight o'clock a.m. And I would wait to be assured she had come into the world alive before I assigned to her all that property. It was enough that in yonder closet opposite my dressing-table, garments said to be hers had already displaced my black-stuff low-wood frock and straw bonnet. For not to me appertained that suit of wedding-raiment, the pearl-coloured robe, the vapoury veil pendant from the usurped Portmanteau. I shut the closet to conceal the strange wraith-like apparel it contained, which at this evening hour, nine o'clock, gave out certainly a most ghostly shimmer through the shadow of my apartment. I will leave you by yourself, white dream, I said. I am feverish. I hear the wind blowing. I will go out of doors and feel it. It was not only the hurry of preparation that made me feverish, not only in the anticipation of the great change, the new life which was to commence to-morrow. With these circumstances had their share doubtless in producing that restless, excited mood which hurried me forth at this late hour into the darkening grounds, but a third cause influenced my mind more than they. I had at heart a strange and anxious thought. Something had happened which I could not comprehend. No one knew of, or had seen the event but myself. It had taken place the preceding night. After Rochester that night was absent from home, nor was he yet returned. Business had called him to a small estate of two or three farms he possessed thirty miles off. Business, it was requisite, he should settle in person, previous to his meditated departure from England. I now waited his return, eager to disburden my mind and to seek of him the solution of the enigma that perplexed me. Stay till he comes, reader, and when I disclose my secret to him, you shall share the confidence. I sought the orchard, driven to its shelter by the wind, which all day had blown strong and full from the south, without, however, bringing a speck of rain. Instead of subsiding as night drew on, it seemed to augment its rush and deepen its roar. The trees blew steadfastly one way, never writhing round, and scarcely tossing back their boughs once in an hour. So continuous was the strain bending their branchy heads northward, the clouds drifting from pole to pole, fast following mass on mass. No glimpse of blue sky had been visible that July day. It was not without a certain wild pleasure I ran before the wind, delivering my trouble of minds to the measureless air-torrent thundering through space. Descending the laurel walk, I faced the wreck of the chestnut tree. It stood up, black and riven. The trunk split down the centre, gasped gasly. The cloven halves were not broken from each other, for the firm base and strong roots kept them unsundered below. Though community of vitality was destroyed, the sap could flow no more, the great boughs on each side were dead, and next winter's tempests would be sure to fell one or both to earth. As yet, however, they might be said to form one tree—a ruin, but an entire ruin. You did right to hold fast to each other, I said, as if the monster splinters were living things, and could hear me. I think, scathed as you look, and charred and scorched, there must be a little sense of life in you yet, rising out of that adhesion at the faithful, honest roots. You will never have green leaves more, never more see birds making nests and singing idols in your boughs. The time of pleasure and love is over with you, but you are not desolate. Each of you has a comrade to sympathise with him and his decay. As I looked up at them, the moon appeared momentarily in that part of the sky which filled their fissure. Her disk was blood-red and half overcast. She seemed to throw on me one bewildered dreary glance, and buried herself again instantly in the deep drift of cloud. The wind fell for a second round thorn-field, but far away over wood and water poured a wild melancholy wail. It was sad to listen to, and I ran off again. There and there I strayed through the orchard, gathered up the apples with which the grass round the tree-roots was thickly strewn. Then I employed myself in dividing the ripe from the unripe. I carried them into the house and put them away in the storeroom. Then I repaired to the library to ascertain whether the fire was lit. For though summer I knew on such a gloomy evening Mr. Rochester would like to see a cheerful hearth when he came in. Yes, the fire had been kindled some time, and burnt well. I placed his armchair by the chimney-corner. I wheeled the table near it. I let down the curtain, and had the candles brought in ready for lighting. More restless than ever, when I had completed these arrangements I could not sit still, nor even remain in the house. A little time-piece in the room and the old clock and the hall simultaneously struck ten. "'How late it grows,' I said. "'I will run down to the gates. It is moonlight at intervals. I can see a good way on the road. He may be coming now, and to meet him will save some minutes of suspense. The wind roared high in the great trees which empowered the gates, but the road as far as I could see to the right hand and to the left was all still and solitary, save for the shadows of clouds crossing it at intervals as the moon looked out. It was but a long, pale line, unburied by one moving speck. A purile tear dimmed my eye while I looked, a tear of disappointment and impatience. Ashamed of it, I wiped it away. I lingered. The moon shut herself wholly within her chamber, and drew close her curtain of dense cloud. The night grew dark. Rain came driving fast on the gale. "'I wish he would come. I wish he would come,' I exclaimed, seized with hypochondriac foreboding. I had expected his arrival before tea. Now it was dark. What could keep him? Had an accident happened? The event of last night again recurred to me. I interpreted it as a warning of disaster. I feared my hopes were too bright to be realised, and I had enjoyed so much bliss lately that I imagined my fortune had passed its meridian, and must now decline. "'Well, I cannot return to the house,' I thought. I cannot sit by the fireside while he is abroad in inclement weather. Better tie my limbs than strain my heart. I will go forward and meet him.' I set out. I walked fast, but not far. ere I had measured a quarter of a mile, I heard the tramp of hoofs. A horseman came on, full gallop, a dog ran by his side. Away with evil presentiment! It was he. Here he was, mounted on Missouri, followed by Pilate. He saw me, for the moon had opened a blue field in the sky, and rode in it watery bright. He took his hat off, and waved it round his head. I now ran to meet him. "'There,' he exclaimed, as he stretched out his hand, and bent from the saddle, "'you can't do without me, that is evident. Step on my boot-toe, give me both hands, mount.' I obeyed. Joy made me agile, I sprang up before him. A hearty kissing I got for a welcome, and some boastful triumph, which I swallowed as well as I could. He checked himself in his exultation to demand, "'But is there anything the matter, Janet, that you come to meet me at such an hour? Is there anything wrong?' "'No, but I thought you would never come. I could not bear to wait in the house for you, especially with this wind and rain.' "'Rain and wind, indeed. Yes, you are dripping like a mermaid. Pull my cloak round you. But I think you are feverish, Jane. Both your cheek and hand are burning hot. I ask again, is there anything the matter?' "'Nothing now. I am neither afraid nor unhappy.' "'Then you have been both.' "'Rather. But I'll tell you all about it by and by, sir, and I dare say you will only laugh at me for my pains. I'll laugh at you heartily when tomorrow is past, till then I dare not. My prize is not certain. This is you who have been as slippery as an eel this last month and as thorny as a briar rose. I could not lay a finger anywhere, but I was pricked, and now I seem to have gathered up a stray lamb in my arms. You wandered out of the fold to seek your shepherd, did you, Jane? I wanted you. But don't boast. Here we are at Thornfield, now let me get down." He landed me on the pavement. As John took his horse, and he followed me into the hall, he told me to make haste and put on something dry, and then returned to him in the library, and he stopped me as I made for the staircase to extort a promise that I would not be long, nor was I long. In five minutes I rejoined him. I found him at supper. Take a seat and bear me company, Jane. Please, God, it is the last meal but one you will eat at Thornfield Hall for a long time. I sat down near him, but told him I could not eat. Is it because you have the prospect of a journey before you, Jane? Is it thoughts of going to London that takes away your appetite? I cannot see my prospects clearly tonight, sir, and I hardly know what thoughts I have in my head. Everything in life seems unreal. Except me. I am substantial enough. Touch me. You, sir, are the most phantom like of all. You are a mere dream." He held out his hand, laughing. Is that a dream? said he, placing it close to my eyes. He had a rounded, muscular, and vigorous hand, as well as a long, strong arm. Yes, though I touch it, it is a dream, said I, as I put it down from before my face. Sir, have you finished supper? Yes, Jane. I rang the bell and ordered away the tray. When we were again alone, I stirred the fire, and then took a low seat at my master's knee. It is near midnight, I said. Yes, but remember, Jane, you promised to wake with me the night before my wedding. I did, and I will keep my promise, for an hour or two at least. I have no wish to go to bed. Are all your arrangements complete? All, sir. And on my part likewise, he returned, I have settled everything, and we shall leave Thornfield to-morrow, within half an hour after I return from church. Very well, sir. With what an extraordinary smile you uttered that word very well, Jane. What a bright spot of colour you have on each cheek, and how strangely your eyes glitter. Are you well? I believe I am. Believe? What is the matter? Tell me what you feel. I could not, sir. No words could tell you what I feel. I wish this present hour would never end. Who knows with what fate the next may come charged? This is hypochondria, Jane. You have been overexcited or over-fatigued. Do you, sir, feel calm and happy? Calm? No. But happy. To the heart's core. I looked up at him to read the signs of bliss in his face. It was ardent and flushed. Give me your confidence, Jane," he said, a relief your mind of any weight that oppresses it by imparting it to me. What do you fear, that I shall not prove a good husband? It is the idea farthest from my thoughts. Are you apprehensive of the new sphere you are about to enter, of the new life into which you are passing? No. You puzzle me, Jane. Your look and tone of sorrowful audacity perplex and pain me. I want an explanation. Then, sir, listen. You were from home last night. I was. I know that. A while ago it was something which had happened in my absence—nothing, probably, of consequence—but in short it has disturbed you. Let me hear it. Mrs. Fairfax has said something, perhaps, or you have overheard the servant's talk. Your sensitive self-respect has been wounded." No, sir. It struck twelve. I waited till the time-piece had concluded its silver chime, and the clock its horse vibrating stroke, and then I proceeded. All day yesterday I was very busy, and very happy in my ceaseless bustle, for I am not, as you seem to think, troubled by any haunting fears about the new sphere, etc. I think it a glorious thing to have the hope of living with you, because I love you. No, sir, don't caress me now. Let me talk undisturbed. Yesterday I trusted well in providence, and believed that events were working together for your good in mine. It was a fine day, if you recollect, the calmness of the air and sky for bad apprehensions respecting your safety or comfort on your journey. I walked a little on the pavement after tea, thinking of you, and I beheld you in imagination so near me I scarcely missed your actual presence. I thought of the life that lay before me—your life, sir—in existence more expansive and stirring than my own—as much more so as the depths of the sea to which the brook runs are than the shallows of its own straight channel. I wondered why moralists call this world a dreary wilderness—for me it blossomed like a rose. Just at sunset the air turned cold and the sky cloudy. I went in, Sophie called me upstairs to look at my wedding-dress, which they had just brought, and under it in the box I found your present—the veil which and your princely extravagance you sent for from London resolved, I suppose, since I would not have jewels to cheat me into accepting something as costly. I smiled as I unfolded it, and devised how I would tease you about your aristocratic tastes, and your efforts to mask your plebeian bride and the attributes of a pyrrhus. I thought why I would carry down to you the square of unembroidered blonde I had myself prepared as a covering for my low-born head, and ask if that was not good enough for a woman who could bring her husband neither fortune, beauty, nor connections. I saw plainly how you would look, and heard your impetuous republican answers, and your haughty disavowal of any necessity on your part to augment your wealth or elevate your standing, by marrying either a purse or a coronet. How well you read me, you witch," interposed Mr. Rochester,—but what did you find in the veil besides its embroidery? Did you find poison, or a dagger, that you look so mournful now? No, no, sir. Besides the delicacy and richness of the fabric, I found nothing save Fairfax Rochester's pride, and that did not scare me, because I am used to the sight of the demon. But sir, as it grew dark, the wind rose, it blew yesterday evening, not as it blows now, wild and high, but with a sullen moaning sound, far more eerie. I wished you were at home. I came into this room, and the sight of the empty chair and fireless hearth chilled me. For some time after I went to bed I could not sleep, a sense of anxious excitement distressed me. The gales still rising seemed to my ear to muffle a mournful undersound. Whether in the house or abroad, I could not at first tell. But it recurred, doubtful yet doleful at every lull. At last I made out it must be some dog howling at a distance. I was glad when it ceased. On sleeping I continued in dreams the idea of a dark and gusty night. I continued also the wish to be with you, and experienced a strange regretful consciousness of some barrier dividing us. During all my first sleep I was following the windings of an unknown road. Total obscurity environed me, rain pelted me. I was burdened with the charge of a little child, a very small creature, too young and feeble to walk, and which shivered in my cold arms and wailed piteously in my ear. I thought so that you were on the road a long way before me, and I strained every nerve to overtake you, and made effort on effort to utter your name and treat you to stop. But my movements were fettered, and my voice still died away in articulate, while you, I felt, withdrew farther and farther every moment. And those dreams weigh on your spirits now, Jane, when I am close to you. Little nervous subject! Forget visionary woe, and think only of real happiness. You say you love me, Janet? Yes, I will not forget that, and you cannot deny it. Those words did not die in articulate on your lips. I heard them clear and soft. A thought too solemn, perhaps, but sweet as music. I think it is a glorious thing to have the hope of living with you, Edward, because I love you. Do you love me, Jane? Repeat it. I do, sir. I do, with my whole heart. Well, he said, after some minute silence, it is strange, but that sentence has penetrated my breast painfully. Why? I think because you said it with such an earnest religious energy, and because you're upward gaze at me now as the very sublime of faith, truth, and devotion. It is too much as if some spirit were near me. Look wicked, Jane, as you know well how to look. Coin one of your wild, shy, provoking smiles. Tell me you hate me. Tease me. Vex me. Do anything but move me. I would rather be incensed than saddened. I will tease you and vex you to your heart's content when I have finished my tale, but hear me to the end. I thought, Jane, you had told me all. I thought I had found the source of your melancholy in a dream. I shook my head. What? Is there more? But I will not believe it to be anything important. I warn you of incredulity beforehand. Go on." The disquietude of his air, the somewhat apprehensive impatience of his manner, surprised me. But I proceeded. I dreamt another dream, sir. That Thornfield Hall was a dreary ruin, the retreat of bats and owls. I thought that of all the stately front nothing remained but a shell-like wall, very high and very fragile-looking. I wandered on a moonlit night through the grass-grown enclosure within. Here I stumbled over a marble hearth, and there over a fallen fragment of cornice. Wrapped up in a shawl, I still carried the unknown little child. I might not lay it down anywhere, however tired my arms, however much its weight impeded my progress, I must retain it. I heard the gallop of a horse at a distance on the road. I was sure it was you, and you were departing for many years, and for a distant country. I climbed a thin wall with frantic, perilous haste, eager to catch one glimpse of you from the top. The stones rolled from under my feet, the ivy branches I grasped gave way. The child clung round my neck in terror, and almost strangled me. At last I gained the summit. I saw you like a speck on a white track, lessening every moment. The blast blew so strong I could not stand. I sat down on the narrow ledge, I hushed the scarred infant in my lap. You turned an angle of the road. I bent forward to take a last look. The wall crumbled. I was shaken. The child rolled from my knee. I lost my balance, fell, and woke. Now, Jane, that is all. All the preface, sir. The tale is yet to come. On waking a gleamed dazzled my eyes. I thought, oh, it is daylight! But I was mistaken. It was only candlelight. Sophie, I suppose, had come in. There was a light in the dressing-table in the door of the closet, where, before going to bed, I had hung my wedding-dress and veil stood open. I heard a rustling there. I asked, Sophie, what are you doing? No one answered. But a form emerged from the closet. It took the light, held it aloft, and surveyed the garment's pendant from the portmanteau. Sophie! Sophie! I again cried. And still it was silent. I had risen up in bed. I bent forward. First surprise, then bewilderment, came over me. And then my blood crept cold through my veins. Mr. Rochester, this was not Sophie. It was not Lea. It was not Mrs. Fairfax. It was not. No. I was sure of it, and am still. It was not even that strange woman, Grace Poole. It must have been one of them, interrupted my master. No, sir. I solemnly assure you to the contrary. The shape standing before me had never crossed my eyes within the precincts of Thornfield Hall before. The height, the contour, were new to me. Describe it, Jane. It seemed, sir, a woman, tall and large, with thick and dark hair hanging down her back. I knew not what dress she had on. It was white and straight, but whether gown, sheet, or shroud, I cannot tell. Did you see her face? Not at first. But presently she took my veil from its place. She held it up, gazed at it long, and then she threw it over her own head and turned to the mirror. At that moment I saw the reflection of the visage and features quite distinctly in the dark oblong glass. And how were they? Fearful and ghastly to me. Oh, sir, I never saw a face like it. It was a discoloured face. It was a savage face. I wish I could forget the roll of the red eyes and the fearful blackened inflation of the liniments. Ghosts are usually pale, Jane. This, sir, was purple. The lips were swelled and dark. The brow furrowed. The black eyebrows widely raised over the bloodshot eyes. Shall I tell you of what it reminded me? You may. Of the foul German spectre, the vampire. Ah! What did it do? Sir, it removed my veil from its gaunt head, rented in two parts, and flinging both on the floor, trampled on them. Afterwards it drew aside the window-curtain and looked out. Perhaps it saw dawn approaching, for taking the candle it retreated to the door. Just at my bedside, the figure stopped. The fiery eyes glared upon me. She thrust up her candle close to my face and extinguished it under my eyes. I was aware her laurel visage flamed over mine, and I lost consciousness. For the second time in my life—only the second time—I became insensible from terror. Who was with you when you revived? No one, sir, but the broad day. I rose, bathed my head in facing water, drank a long draught, felt that though enfeebled I was not ill, and determined that to none but you would I impart this vision. Now, sir, tell me who and what that woman was. The creature of an overstimulated brain—that is certain. I must be careful of you, my treasure. Nerves like yours were not made for rough handling. Sir, depend upon it. My nerves were not in fault. The thing was real. The transaction actually took place. And your previous dreams, were they real, too? Is Thornfield Hall a ruin? Am I severed from you by insuperable obstacles? Am I leaving you without a tear, without a kiss, without a word? Not yet. Am I about to do it? Why, the day is already commenced, which is to bind us indissolubly, and when we are once united there shall be no recurrence of these mental terrors. I guarantee that. Mental terrors, sir! I wish I could believe them to be only such. I wish it more now than ever, since even you cannot explain to be the mystery of that awful visitant. And since I cannot do it, Jane, it must have been unreal. But, sir, when I said so to myself on rising this morning, and when I looked round the room to gather courage and comfort from the cheerful aspect of each familiar object in full daylight—there, on the carpet, I saw what gave the distinct lie to my hypothesis—the veil, torn from top to bottom, in two halves. I felt Mr. Rogers to start, and shudder. He hastily flung his arms round me. Thank God! he exclaimed, that if anything malignant did come near you last night it was only the veil that was harmed, or to think what might have happened. He drew his breath short, and strained me so close to him I could scarcely pant. After some minute silence he continued cheerily. Now, Janet, I'll explain to you all about it. It was half dream, half reality. A woman did, I doubt, not enter your room, and that woman was, must have been, Grace Poole. You call her a strange being yourself. From all you know you have reasons to call her. What did she do to me? What a mason! In a state between sleeping and waking you noticed her entrance and her actions. But feverish, almost delirious as you were, you ascribed to her a goblin appearance different from her own. The long dishevelled hair, the swelled black face, the exaggerated stature, were figments of imagination, the results of nightmare. The spiteful tearing of the veil was real, and it is like her. I see you would ask why I keep such a woman in my house, when we have been married a year and a day I will tell you, but not now. Are you satisfied, Jane? Do you accept my solution of the mystery?" I reflected, and in truth it appeared to me the only possible one. Satisfied I was not, but to please him I endeavoured to appear so. Relieved I certainly did feel, so I answered him with a contented smile. And now, as it was long past one, I prepared to leave him. Was not Sophie sleep with Adele in the nursery? He asked, as I lit my candle. Yes, sir. And there is enough room in Adele's little bed for you. You must share it with her to-night, Jane. It is no wonder that the incident you have related should make you nervous, and I would rather you did not sleep alone. Promise me to go to the nursery. I shall be very glad to do so, sir. And fasten the door securely on the inside. Wake Sophie when you go upstairs, and a pretence of requesting her to rouse you in good time to-morrow, for you must be dressed and have finished breakfast before eight. And now, no more sumber thoughts, chase dull care away, Janet. Don't you hear to what soft whispers the wind has fallen, and there is no more beating of rain against the window-panes? Look here! He lifted up the curtain. It is a lovely night. It was. Half-heaven was pure and stainless. The clouds now trooping before the wind, which had shifted to the west, were filing off eastward in long, silvered columns, the moon shone peacefully. Well, said Mr. Rochester, gazing inquiringly into my eyes, how is my Janet now? The night is serene, sir, and so am I. And you will not dream of separation and sorrow to-night, but of happy love and blissful union. This prediction was but half fulfilled. I did not indeed dream of sorrow, but as little did I dream of joy, for I never slept at all. With little Adele in my arms I watched the slumber of childhood, so tranquil, so passionless, so innocent, and waited for the coming day. All my life was awakened to stir in my frame, and as soon as the sun rose, I rose too. I remember Adele clung to me as I left her. I remember I kissed her as I loosened her little hands from my neck, and I cried over her with strange emotion, and quitted her because I feared my sobs would break her still-sound repose. She seemed the emblem of my past life, and here I was now to array myself to meet the dread, but adored, type of my unknown future day. CHAPTER 26 Sophie came at seven to dress me. She was very long indeed in accomplishing her task, so long that Mr. Rochester, grown, I suppose, impatient of my delay, sent up to ask why I did not come. She was just fastening my veil, the plain square of blonde, after all, to my hair with a brooch. I hurried from under her hands as soon as I could. Stop! she cried in French. Look at yourself in the mirror, you have not taken one peep. So I turned at the door. I saw a robed and veiled figure, so unlike my usual self that it seemed almost the image of a stranger. Jane! called a voice, and I hastened down. I was received at the foot of the stairs by Mr. Rochester. Lingerer! he said. My brain is on fire with impatience, and you tarry so long. He took me into the dining-room, surveyed me keenly all over, pronounced me, fair as a lily, and not only the pride of his life, but the desire of his eyes, and then telling me he would give me but ten minutes to eat some breakfast, he rang the bell. One of his lately hired servants, a footman, answered it. Is John getting the carriage ready? Yes, sir. Is the luggage brought down? They are bringing it down, sir. Go you to the church, see if Mr. Wood—the clergyman—and the clerk are there, return and tell me. The church, as the reader knows, was but just beyond the gates, the footman soon returned. Mr. Wood is in the vestry, sir, putting on his surplus. And the carriage? The horses are harnessing. We shall not want it to go to church, but it must be ready the moment we return. All the boxes and luggage arranged and strapped on, and the coachman in his seat. Yes, sir. Jane, are you ready? I rose. There were no groomsmen, no bridesmaids, no relatives to wait for or marshal—none but Mr. Rochester and I. Mrs. Fairfax stood in the hall as we passed. I would feign if spoken to her. But my hand was held by a grasp of iron. I was hurried along by a stride I could hardly follow, and to look at Mr. Rochester's face was to feel that not a second of delay would be tolerated for any purpose. I wonder what other bridegroom ever looked as he did. So bent up to a purpose, so grimly resolute, or who, under such steadfast brows, ever revealed such flaming and flashing eyes? I know not whether the day was fair or foul. In descending the drive I gazed neither on sky nor earth. My heart was with my eyes, and both seemed migrated into Mr. Rochester's frame. I wanted to see the invisible thing, on which, as we went along, he appeared to fasten a glance, fierce, and fell. I wanted to feel the thoughts whose force he seemed breasting and resisting. At the churchyard wicket he stopped. He discovered I was quite out of breath. Am I cruel in my love? he said. Delay an instant. Lean on me, Jane. And now I can recall the picture of the old grey house of God rising calm before me, of a rock wheeling round the steeple, of a ruddy morning sky beyond. I remember something, too, of the green grave-mounds, and I have not forgotten either two figures of strangers straying amongst the low hillocks and reading the mementos graven on the few mossy headstones. I noticed them, because as they saw us, they passed round to the back of the church, and I doubted not, but they were going to enter by the side-isle door and witness the ceremony. By Mr. Rochester they were not observed. He was earnestly looking at my face from which the blood had, I daresay, momentarily fled. For I felt my forehead dewy, and my cheeks and lips cold. When I rallied, which I soon did, he walked gently with me up the path to the porch. We entered the quiet and humble temple. The priest waited in his white surplus at the lowly altar, the clerk beside him. All was still. Two shadows only moved in a remote corner. My conjecture had been correct. The strangers had slipped in before us, and they now stood by the vault of the Rochester's, their backs towards us, viewing through the rails the old, time-stained marble tomb, where a kneeling angel guarded the remains of Demaire de Rochester, slain at Marston Moor in the time of the Civil Wars, and of Elizabeth, his wife. Our place was taken at the communion-rails. Hearing a cautious step behind me, I glanced over my shoulder. One of the strangers—a gentleman evidently—was advancing up the chancel. The service began. The explanation of the intent of matrimony was gone through, and then the clergyman came a step further forward, and bending slightly towards Mr. Rochester, went on. I require and charge you both, as he will answer at the dreadful day of judgment when the secrets of all hearts shall be disclosed, that if either of you know any impediment why you may not lawfully be joined together in matrimony, you do now confess it, for be ye well assured that so many as a couple together otherwise than God's word doth allow, are not joined together by God, neither is their matrimony lawful. He paused, as the custom is. When is the pause after that sentence ever broken by reply? Not perhaps once in a hundred years, and the clergyman who had not lifted his eyes from his book, and had held his breath but for a moment, was proceeding. His hand was already stretched towards Mr. Rochester, as his lips unclosed to ask, Wilt thou have this woman for thy wedded wife? When a distinct and near voice said, The marriage cannot go on, I declare the existence of an impediment. The clergyman looked up at the speaker, and stood mute. The clerk did the same. Mr. Rochester moved slightly, as if an earthquake had rolled under his feet. Taking a firmer footing, and not turning his head or eyes, he said, Proceed. Some silence fell when he had uttered that word, with deep but low intonation. Presently Mr. Wood said, I cannot proceed without some investigation into what has been asserted in evidence of its truth or falsehood. The ceremony is quite broken off, subjoined the voice behind us. I am in a condition to prove my allegation, and insuperable impediment to this marriage exists. Mr. Rochester heard, but he did not. He stood stubborn and rigid, making no movement but to possess himself of my hand. What a hot and strong grasp he had! And how, like a quarried marble, was his pale, firm, massive front at this moment! How his eyes shone, still watchful, and yet wild beneath! Mr. Wood seemed at a loss. What is the nature of the impediment? he asked. Perhaps it may be got over, explained away. Hardly, was the answer. I have called it insuperable, and I speak advisedly. The speaker came forward and leaned on the rails. He continued uttering each word distinctly, calmly, steadily, but not loudly. It simply consists in the existence of a previous marriage. Mr. Rochester has a wife, now living. My nerves vibrated to those low-spoken words as they had never vibrated to thunder. My blood felt their subtle violence as it had never felt frost or fire, but I was collected, and in no danger of swooning. I looked at Mr. Rochester. I made him look at me. His whole face was colourless rock, his eye was both spark and flint. He disavowed nothing. He seemed as if he would defy all things. Without speaking, without smiling, without seeming to recognise in me a human being, he only twined my waist with his arm and riveted me to his side. Who are you? he asked of the intruder. My name is Briggs, a solicitor of Blank Street, London. And you would thrust on me a wife. I would remind you of your lady's existence, sir, which the law recognises, if you do not. Favour me with an account of her, with her name, her parentage, a place of abode. Certainly. Mr. Briggs calmly took a paper from his pocket, and read out in a sort of official nasal voice. I affirm and can prove that on the 20th of October AD—a date of some fifteen years back—Edward Fairfax Rochester of Thornton Hill Hall in the county of Blank, and a fern dean manor in Blankshire, England, was married to my sister Bertha Antoinetta Mason, daughter of Jonas Mason, merchant, and of Antoinetta his wife, a creole, at Blank Church, Spanish Town, Jamaica. The record of the marriage will be found in the register of that church. A copy of it is now in my possession, signed Richard Mason. That, if a genuine document, may prove I have been married, but it does not prove that the woman mentioned therein as my wife is still living. She was living three months ago—return to the lawyer. How do you know? I have a witness to the fact, whose testimony even you, sir, will scarcely contravert. Produce him, or go to hell. I will produce him first—he is on the spot—Mr. Mason had the goodness to step forward. Mr. Rochester, unhearing the name, set his teeth. He experienced, too, a sort of strong, convulsive quiver. Near to him as I was, I felt the sparse modic movement of fury or despair run through his frame. The second stranger, who had hitherto lingered in the background, now drew near. A pale face looked over the solicitor's shoulder. Yes, it was Mason himself. Mr. Rochester turned and glared at him. His eye, as I have often said, was a black eye. It now had a tawny, nay, a bloody light in its gloom, and his face flushed. Olive-cheek and hueless forehead received a glow as from spreading, ascending heart-fire, and he stirred, lifted his strong arm. He could have struck Mason, dashed him on the church floor, shocked by ruthless blow, the breath from his body, but Mason shrank away and cried faintly, Good God! Contempt fell cool on Mr. Rochester. His passion died as if a blight had shriveled up. He only asked, What have you to say? An audible reply escaped Mason's white lips. The devil is in it, if you cannot answer distinctly. I again demand, what have you to say? Sir, sir," interrupted the clergyman, Do not forget you are in a sacred place. Then, addressing Mason, he inquired gently, Are you aware, sir, whether or not this gentleman's wife is still living? Courage, urged the lawyer, speak out. She is now living at Thornfield Hall, said Mason in more articulate tones. I saw her there last April. I am her brother. At Thornfield Hall, ejaculated the clergyman, Impossible! I am an old resident in this neighbourhood, sir, and I never heard of a Mrs. Rochester at Thornfield Hall. I saw a grim smile contort Mr. Rochester's lips, and he muttered, No, by God, I took care that none should hear of it, or of her under that name. He mused. For ten minutes he held counsel with himself. He formed his resolve, and announced it. Enough! All shall bolt out at once like the bullet from the barrel. Would close your book and take off your surplus. John Green—to the clerk—leave the church. There will be no wedding to-day." The man obeyed. Mr. Rochester continued, heartily and recklessly, Bigamy is an ugly word. I meant, however, to be a bigamist, but fate has outmaneuvered me, or Providence has checked me—perhaps the last. I am little better than a devil at this moment, and as my pastor there would tell me, deserve no doubt the sternest judgments of God, even to the quenchless fire and deathless worm. Gentlemen, my plan has broken up. What this lawyer and his client say is true. I have been married, and the woman to whom I was married lives. You say you have never heard of a Mrs. Rochester at the house up Yonderwood, but I dare say you have many a time inclined your ear to gossip about the mysterious lunatic kept under watch and ward. Some have whispered to you that she is my bastard half-sister. Some my cast-off mistress. I now inform you that she is my wife, whom I married fifteen years ago. Bertha Mason by name, sister of this resolute personage, who is now with his quivering limbs and white cheeks showing you what a stout heart men my bear. Cheer up, Dick! Never fear me! I'd almost as soon strike a woman as you. Bertha Mason is mad, and she came of a mad family, idiots and maniacs through three generations. Her mother, the Crayol, was both a mad woman and a drunkard, as I found out after I had wed the daughter, for they was silent on family's secrets before. Bertha, like a dutiful child, copied her parent in both points. I had a charming partner, pure, wise, modest, you can fancy I was a happy man. I went through rich scenes—oh!—my experience has been heavenly, if you only knew it. But I owe you no further explanation. Briggs, Wood, Mason, I invite you all to come up to the house and visit Mrs. Poole's patient and my wife. You shall see what sort of a being I was cheated into espousing, and judge whether or not I had a right to break the compact, and seek sympathy with something at least human. This girl—he continued, looking at me—knew no more than you, Wood, of the disgusting secret. She thought all was fair and legal, and never dreamt she was going to be entrapped into a famed union with a defrauded wretch, already bound to a bad, mad, and brooted partner. Come all of you, follow." Still holding me fast, he left the church. The three gentlemen came after. At the front door of the hall we found the carriage. "'Take it back to the coach-house, John,' said Mr. Rochester Cooley. "'It will not be wanted to-day.' At our entrance Mrs. Fairfax, Adele, Sophie, Leah, advanced to meet and greet us. "'To the right about every soul,' cried the master. "'Away with your congratulations! Who wants them? Not I! They are fifteen years too late.' He passed on and ascended the stairs, still holding my hand, and still beckoning the gentlemen to follow him, which they did. We mounted the first staircase, passed up the gallery, proceeded to the third story. The low, black door opened by Mr. Rochester's master-key, admitted us into the tapestry room, with its great bed and its pictorial cabinet. "'You know this place, Maison,' said our guide, she bit and stabbed you here." He lifted the hangings from the wall, uncovering the second door. This, too, he opened. In a room without a window, there burnt a fire guarded by a high and strong fender, and a lamp suspended from the ceiling by a chain. Grace Pool bent over the fire, apparently cooking something in a saucepan. In the deep shade at the farther end of the room, a figure rend backwards and forwards. What it was, whether beast or human being, one could not at first sight tell. It groveled seemingly on all fours. It snatched and growled like some strange wild animal, but it was covered with clothing, and a quantity of dark, grizzled hair, wild as a mane, hid its head and face. "'Good-morrow, Mrs. Pool,' said Mr. Rochester. "'How are you, and how is your charge, to-day?' "'We're terrible, sir, I thank you,' replied Grace, lifting the boiling mess carefully on to the hob. Rather snappish, but not rages. Her fierce cry seemed to give the lie to her favourable report. The clothes tie-ina rose up, and stood tall on its hind feet. "'Ah, sir, she sees you,' exclaimed Grace. "'You'd better not stay.' "'Only a few moments, Grace. You must allow me a few moments.' "'Take care, then, sir. For God's sake, take care.' The maniac bellowed. She parted her shaggy locks from her visage, and gazed wildly at her visitors. I recognized well that purple face, those bloated features. Mrs. Pool advanced. "'Keep out of the way,' said Mr. Rochester, thrusting her aside. "'She has no knife now, I suppose, and I'm on my guard. One never knows what she has, sir. She is so cunning, and is not in mortal discretion to fathom her craft. We had better leave her,' whispered Mason. "'Go to the devil,' was his brother-in-law's recommendation." "'Where?' cried Grace. The three gentlemen retreated simultaneously. Mr. Rochester flung me behind him. The lunatics sprang, and grappled his throat viciously, and laid her teeth to his cheek. They struggled. She was a big woman, and stature almost equalling her husband, and corpulent besides. She showed virile force in the contest. More than once she almost throttled him, athletic as he was. He could have settled her with a well-planted blow, but he would not strike. He would only wrestle. At last he mastered her arms. Grace Pool gave him a cord, and he pinioned them behind her. With more rope, which was at hand, he bound her to a chair. The operation was performed amidst the fiercest yells and the most convulsive plungers. Mr. Rochester then turned to the spectators. He looked at them with a smile both acrid and desolate. "'That is my wife,' said he. Such is the soul-conjugal embrace I am ever to know. Such are the endearments which are to solace my leisure hours. And this is what I wished to have.' Laying his hand on my shoulder. This young girl, who stands so grave and quiet at the mouth of hell, looking collectively at the gambles of a demon, I wanted her just as a change after that fierce ragout. Warden Briggs, look at the difference. Where these clear eyes with the red balls yonder, this face with that mask, this form with that bulk, then judge me, priest of the gospel and man of the law, and remember with what judgment ye judge ye shall be judged. Off with you now. I must shut up my prize." We all withdrew. Mr. Rochester stayed a moment behind us to give some further order to Grace Pool. The solicitor addressed me as he descended the stair. You, madam, said he, are cleared from all blame. Your uncle be glad to hear it, if indeed he should be still living, when Mr. Mason returns to Madeira. My uncle? What of him? Do you know him? Mr. Mason does. Mr. Rare has been the functional correspondent of his house for some years. When your uncle received your letter into mating the contemplated union between yourself and Mr. Rochester, Mr. Mason, who was staying at Madeira to recruit his health, on his way back to Jamaica, happened to be with him. Mr. Rare mentioned the intelligence, for he knew that my client here was acquainted with the gentleman of the name of Rochester. Mr. Mason, astonished and distressed, as you may suppose, revealed the real state of matters. Your uncle, I am sorry to say, is now on a sick bed, from which, considering the nature of his disease, decline, and the stage it has reached, it is unlikely he will ever rise. He could not then hasten to England himself, to extricate you from the snare into which you had fallen, but he implored Mr. Mason to lose no time in taking steps to prevent the false marriage. He referred him to me for assistance. I used all dispatch, and am thankful I was not too late, as you doubtless must be also. Were I not morally certain that your uncle would be dead ere you reached Madeira, I would advise you to accompany Mr. Mason back. But as it is, I think you had better remain in England till you can hear further, either from or of Mr. Rare. Have we anything else to stay for?" He inquired of Mr. Mason. No! No! Let us be gone!" was the anxious reply. And without waiting to take leave of Mr. Rochester, they made their exit at the hall door. The clergyman stayed to exchange a few sentences, either of admonition or reproof with his haughty parishioner. This duty done, he too departed. I heard him go as I stood at the half-open door of my own room to which I had now withdrawn. The house cleared, I shut myself in, fastened the boat that none might intrude, and proceeded, not to weep, not to mourn. I was yet too calm for that, but mechanically to take off the wedding-dress, and replace it by the stuff gown I had worn yesterday, as I thought for the last time. I then sat down. I felt weak and tired. I leaned my arms on table, and my head dropped on them. And now, I thought, till now I had only heard, seen, moved, followed up and down where I was led or dragged, watched event, rush on event, disclosure open beyond disclosure. But now, I thought. The morning had been a quiet morning enough, all except the brief scene with the lunatic. The transaction and the church had not been noisy. There was no explosion of passion, no loud altercation, no dispute, no defiance or challenge, no tears, no sobs. A few words had been spoken, a calmly pronounced objection to the marriage made. Some stern, short questions put by Mr. Rochester—answers, explanations given, evidence reduced, an open admission of the truth had been uttered by my master. Then the living proof had been seen, the intruders were gone, and all was over. I was in my own room as usual, just myself, without obvious change. Nothing had smitten me, or scathed me, or maimed me. And yet, where was the Jane Eyre of yesterday? Where was her life? Where were her prospects? Jane Eyre, who had been an ardent, expectant woman, almost a bride, was a cold, solitary girl again. Her life was pale, her prospects were desolate. A Christmas frost had come at mid-summer, a white December storm had whirled over June. Ice glazed the ripe apples, drifts crushed the blowing roses, on hayfield and cornfield lay a frozen shroud. Mountains which last night blushed full of flowers today were pathless with untrodden snow, and the woods which twelve hours since waved leafy and fragrant as grows between the tropics, now spread waste, wild, and white as pine forests in wintry Norway. My hopes were all dead, struck with a subtle doom, such as in one night fell on all the first born in the land of Egypt. I looked on my cherished wishes, yesterday so blooming and glowing. They lay stark, chill, livid corpses that would never revive. I looked at my love, that feeling which was my master's, which he had created. It shivered in my heart, like a suffering child in a cold cradle. Sickness and anguish had seized it. It could not seek Mr. Rochester's arms, it could not derive warmth from his breast. How nevermore could it turn to him, for faith was blighted, confidence destroyed. Mr. Rochester was not to me what he had been, for he was not what I had thought him. I would not ascribe vice to him, I would not say he had betrayed me, but the attribute of stainless truth was gone from his idea, and from his presence I must go. That I perceived well. When, how, wither, I could not yet discern, but he himself, I doubted not, would hurry me from Thornfield. Real affection it seemed he could not have for me, it had been only fitful passion. But was bought, he would want me no more. I should fare even to cross his path now, my view must be hateful to him. Oh! how blind had been my eyes! How weak my conduct! My eyes were covered and closed, eddying darkness seemed to swim round me, and reflection came in as black and confused aflow. Self-abandoned, relaxed, and effortless, I seemed to have laid me down in the dried-up bed of a great river. I had a flood loosened in remote mountains, and felt the torrent come. To rise I had no will, to flee I had no strength, I lay faint, longing to be dead. One idea only still throbbed lifelike within me, her remembrance of God. It begot an unuttered prayer. These words went wandering up and down in my railess mind, as something that should be whispered, but no energy was found to express them. Be not far from me, for trouble is near. There is none to help. It was near, and as I had lifted no petition to heaven to avert it, as I had neither joined my hands nor bent my knees nor moved my lips, it came. In full heavy swing the torrent poured over me. The whole consciousness of my life lawn, my love lost, my hope quenched, my faith dead struck, swayed full and mighty above me in one sullen mass. That bitter hour cannot be described. In truth the waters came into my soul, I sank in deep mire, I felt no standing, I came into deep waters, the floods overflowed me.