 Before I found Jesus, I lived a life of hedonistic pleasure. I used to smoke, drink, and smell cocaine. Spent lost of fortune on design of garments. Burped at the Vatican. I farted on the Queen. Before I found Jesus, I relieved myself freely outdoors. Like an animal. Punched my son's teeth. Touched the firefighter. Punched a fourth grade. He deserved to stole a pig. I saw Jack and Jill in thieves. I faked my dog's death. I faked my dad's death. And then I finished the job. Now that was fun.