 the place where they go to meet. What is it that you two sharing how you do that? There's no way you can ignore that almost anymore. Go from all of them and you can come and see and talk about it. So thank you everybody for coming here out to the Martini Seagull Theatre Center at the Graduate Center CUNY. My name is Frank Kenchman. I'm the director of the Seagull Center. It's really a great pleasure to have you all here. And to what we think is a very significant and important evening. Our center, the Seagull Center bridges academia and professional theater, international and American theater. And we have had many encounters with Latin American theaters in China, Argentina. Also one evening at this Brazilian Writers was significant and beautiful and such a high quality of work that we call it here. And to be collaborated with Bella and the Ivoí ensemble to put this together, Bella, was an intern here for the next generation fellow and as part of that work she also created the evening and this is this one. And it's a great, great honor for us to have Seginia here from Brazil at Marcia. If you could just give Seginia a hand. I feel in Josh for this very evening and Ana Maria couldn't be with us who looked like for a while. She could but after a novel but everything looked less and less likely. I think we will have her here one day but it's a great honor. She will be here with Kai for us and to share. We really think it is significant to hear by diversity of voices, something that reflects also the city or here on stages not all the stories that should be told. So this is a great contribution towards this life intellectual, cultural, artistic and theatrical life in New York City. So thank you for everybody to put this together the Ivoíos collective and Isabella and our Segal team thank you for coming. The readings will be about 90 minutes like two 30-minute excerpts and then three individual monologues from one of the plays it's all inside here and there is a reception afterwards at the Archive Bar of 36 weeks it's just along the corner from Pitts to Madison it's in the program, you can see that and I hope you all will be able to join us. And to now I would like to all you can take out your phone for one second and just check that it's all I'll do the very same and it never rings in our events it's really really true so please do carefully check it and again thank you so very very much welcome we are the Ivoí collective a collective of four Brazilian artists living in New York it is undeniable the popularity of Brazilian culture yet we experienced a lack of Brazilian productions in New York and decided to come together to bridge this gap tonight's reading is the second edition of our first project called Brazil Reads Brazil this event is the fruit of our need to present female contemporary work and Frank's undying interest in Brazilian theater our country is facing an extremely dark political moment which seems characteristic of the times our art is being censored exhibitions are being shut down and plays are being cancelled if that wasn't enough right now Brazil is the country that most kills LGBTQ people in the world the fifth country with the highest number of female homicides being 70% of them black women in São Paulo where two of the plays you'll see tonight are set a woman is publicly raped every 11 hours so it means so much to us to share this work with you tonight of these daring and strong women tonight you'll be hearing The Body's Night by Marcia Zanelato the play is a story of a young couple Clara and Isabel beautiful, talented and in love but the meaning of life is questioned when one of them is diagnosed with a degenerative disease diverse Bayana Maria Bonsovis captures the day to day of a couple João and Marcia and their efforts to stray away from the prejudices of a racist society and now to start the night the reading of God Pregnant gave birth to horses and learned how to fly without wings by Ceginha da Silva a play about a daily the daily routine of six black women who live in the same building they have no interaction nor do they know each other however there are similar yearnings reveal the private truth of a buried affection and she's oblivious to it another grasps everything she can find in front of her the other has no hope one is suffocating the other mourning life and yet thirsty to live a female extremely vulnerable and sad sometimes resigned sometimes devoted sometimes even happy sometimes determined strong a woman deprived of love loves because love is like eye drops and clouds the eyes love is water that sprouts and does not see it radiates, fertilizes and blossoms I made it official I was 15 I didn't like the name my mom gave me and I resented her I took this opportunity to reinvent myself and became a movie star like Darlene Gloria her mother's mind was guided by windy dreams and that wind blew her to Sao Paulo she left us still kids alone cradled by a big bad world when I got sad I got real sad when my mom gave us back to my grandmothers in Bahia I used to shower hoping it would get rid of the sadness but it wouldn't there was the sadness my uncle left when he touched us there was the sadness from poverty the sadness of being yet another pain in the neck at home a mother's love used to climb trees and scream out the pain that was eating me alive birdies, roses and bushes were my friends I asked them to carry messages to my mother through the wind and rain every time I saw a cloud I wished the wind blew it to Sao Paulo so that when it rained it poured on my mother's forehead and that spotlight hit making her see our pain being it for real love is sorrow systematic violence reality only poured on my mother when I was already nine and had been scarred by the lack of love felt someone had tied a knot in that moment of my path that was never untied and that knot all my life and it got tighter and tighter after my mother brought us back from my grandma's and by then my uncle a little older than my sister molested us and my mother's husband raped it it was a big doom then I grew up so no one could fuck with me oh love hurts everyone loves me I gave birth to a boy and a kid to share cake with at birthday parties when he was born he had everything people to buy me formula on the streets best for him bougie food wanted this for my mother to love me I never registered my child I didn't have any of the money just like my mom she's name every year and counted each year by the name I gave him I think today he looks like this and baptize him and today he looks like that and baptize him again till the day an astronaut's name one day I was walking the streets with my son we were begging crying of hunger and then took us home pleading for food at least for my son food could wait maybe we didn't stop crying and he shut up he was the one who got smacked and he raped me I'm not sure if the kids saw it I didn't see anything the knot blinded me with a boy licking my salty sweaty face licking my apple cheeks enjoying the taste the man was sitting there shining his shoes saying I'd eat we ate the whole thing the man said he only needed to force himself onto me the first time because the smell of a black street bitch just drove him crazy that I would always have food I could cook and eat and the boy could eat too I would be at his disposal whenever he wanted he'd call and I'd drop everything and go I mean I didn't even have to shower every day he liked the smell of black women he liked to grab me by the pussy like he used to to dogs when he was a boy and didn't have a woman yet one day on top of me on the edge of the stove I turned my head to the side and I felt his heavy breathing on my neck all his things hammered me Henry clouded me my grandmother killing pigs look into the animal's eyes straight into it so it knows who's the boss and then on its first slip stab it till it bleeds dead I looked at that man like I've never looked at any pig I stared deep into those eyes I already had the knife and I remembered my grandma saying you should leave the pig till death no pity so I shoved that knife in his neck with all the strength black soul and then I stabbed him in his armpit searching for his heart because that's because they say that's where the love lies then I yanked him off of me just grabbing him by the hair blood streaming out his body convulsing then I cracked the pressure cooker over his head and then I pulled the knife and drove it in his dick so he would never stick that thing in me again I left it there my freedom's left the apartment is beautifully decorated with a mixture of classic and modern elements enter Monsia, 40 years old mixed race she's a partner and head editor of a medium sized publisher Joao table? I think it's a cake, my mother sent it for you did you go to her house? she stopped by the theater weren't you supposed to be paid for that commercial today? he's 28 years old but looks younger a talented actor waiting for his big break he's naked and can drag you on a tiny bathroom run he's still drying himself next week I get paid for the photos before rent's up I've already signed up for direct payment can I tell you who's going to pay this month? you can still pay it if you want that's not what I'm talking about you're wetting the floor I'm on the rug you are wetting the rug that is wetting the floor I'll buy it later that commercial money was for her Monsia with seven people living at her expense my mother is 60 years old his work isn't made for more than 40 years get certified in the morning has to take God knows how many buses deals with a lot of bullshit there's no food to eat for most of her life she raised five children on leftover food and hand-me-downs and continues to do so Monsia because if she ever stopped to think about the shitty life she has she would die this money is for her she wants to pay for somebody else's credit card or cable or buy furniture or school supplies or even pay off someone else's debts it's what means a cycle, Joao I know, but I broke it, didn't I? and someone else will with you helping out like this, I doubt it well, she doesn't are you ready to take her place? so that's what you're worried about no, that's not it nothing has ever been here before there isn't going to be a line of the door asking for money but it is a cycle of dependency, Joao and after your mother dies that's exactly what I want because she thinks I'll take her place I do it for her, Marcy somewhere penny when it comes to the rest of them you know that let me handle this, okay? stop it, we'll be late we'll be late Mazza gets up, walks towards the mirror and begins to examine her body and face looking for signs of old age examining her hair touching the roofs that are now growing curly since she stopped straining it do you think you can get ready in 15 minutes? Joao reappears wearing only his pants and holding his shirt in his pants are you sure you want me to come? I wouldn't have waited until now if I didn't, would I? I've been rehearsing all day, I'm tired it's totally fine if you want it we already talked about it you'll be more comfortable without me around I think they don't like me I'll be in your way if you do not want to go, Joao just tell me your reason Joao, he's pushing that responsibility onto me but I'm telling you my reason which are? I don't speak English Brazilians speak Portuguese but isn't the dinner for that Greenville writer? it is I don't know if you're speaking English it's just a gesture, no one is forced to speak and Andrea seems to hold that you're trying to sit as a part of the table it's common to separate couples so you can talk to different people but I don't feel comfortable being the only one who can't participate in the conversation I'll tell her we'll be drawing attention the American guy is the star no one is going to be paying attention to us we always draw attention, Marcia and people talk has anyone said anything to you? do they have to? I'll be whatever I say, everyone steers a polo does he react to it? polo won't be there it's been so long he's with Lucia now my relationship with him today is the same I have with a friend I've known for 15 20 years it's a little more intimate, right? a lot more intimate if you prefer with enough intimacy to call him out if he thinks about embarrassing you I didn't say I did but you did, didn't you? no, I was bringing someone to his book launch this has nothing to do with you this is between me and him he told me before he introduced me to someone and I am just doing the same thing I wonder what you tell people before you introduce me what everyone says when they introduce a new boyfriend or husband and why doesn't anyone ask me anything? what do you mean no one asks you anything? nobody asks me where I'm from how we live you hardly talk to anyone nobody goes around asking you go around preparing everyone before they meet me look he's younger look he's black but he's super intelligent and talented, he'll be big soon I don't do that you know anything like that? no so he's just a lack of interest from your friends what about yours? how many of them have you introduced me to? is no one interested in meeting me? my life has changed a lot in the last few years it's a different problem now so you have no friend left no one who you knew before wants to know who you're living with now I don't think you'll like any of them you can call it something else do you really want me to say it? you're ashamed so what is it then? have you ever seen anyone else? well you can call it something else but you know you feel it and you know I know you feel it and you're just saying that because you're ashamed of me too aren't you? we both know it's more complex than that but it's there for different reasons for different reasons but it's there and I don't even think it's shame of course it's not it's more the fear of not being able to prove that we are not what people think we are when they see us together what if we were? what if we were? if they don't leave you how much I enjoy taking advantage of you we didn't have to leave and I know you love taking advantage of this part you think you're all that don't you? do you listen to me if I shouldn't? you tease and then you think you have the right to complain when people treat you like a sex off and I do because it's my body is it different or is it convenient for you? okay it's convenient but it's also different and how is that? I think I have a way to take advantage of this sometimes when it's convenient I have not much in my favor Marcia don't you want to put on a suit? the intercom rig good evening let me talk to him hi do you want to come up? we're about to leave we'll talk later then Saint Luciaques I'll let him know let's talk soon okay? bye he came to drop off the book I'll pick it up later you do not like it but it looks beautiful use this in your favor because you sure know how to take off a suit in public life nobody else you remember huh? how could I forget? no I didn't you think I wanted to get in line? it was a very short line then I know but I didn't think that line was for me and I thought you were a woman that knows how to work shh shh shh shh think about what you're going to say can I even be a little bit sexist? just a little bit just to compliment you look at the contradiction of what you just said be sexist in order to compliment a woman you think I wanted to get in line is also sexy but I didn't mean to say that I am better than the other women in line I want every woman to get in whatever line they want as many times as they want right all I just thought was that line was trouble that's it can you still do it? do I need to answer that? no once they come and go and they can come and go again we have so many stories to tell you know we are our stories I never thought I'd be interested in anyone you're in interested in love love is always the same the only difference are the fears of whoever's involved in this the fear you're not even a little bit scared maybe it comes with time making us I don't remember being so afraid when I was your age soon I'll be 50 soon you're so dramatic I'm not being dramatic have you ever thought that soon enough you'll be sleeping with a 50 year old woman what's that? you're so equigenarian you said you didn't mind and I don't I'm afraid I said I wasn't but I am not learning enough that's not in our context no I'm serious Paula was a writer wait come it didn't work don't doubt yourself I just wanted you to let me help you you said my friends do a background check on you before I introduce you to friends that might be interested in your work don't even know you're an actor you know I could have been a soccer player if it wasn't for my father when he very rarely showed up at my house I was probably the only one who thought anything good would come of it once, when he worked as a massage therapist or the laundry boy for Corinthians he took me and Maru a friend of mine to try out for the team I was good but Maru was way better he did it I went for a couple months it was probably about the same amount of time it took for my father to disappear again Maru, stop talking to me until everyone the only reason I got in was because my dad knew the gods I never played soccer again I never know if it was because of you or me you're right I think I'm more anxious than you to see you get a great gig I know how is the audition? it's not good you're going to make me guess do we have to leave? it's just I'm thinking of my father you have doubts, right? about what? do I want to be a father? no, not at all Marcia we've already talked so much about this I know Jalal I just don't have time I would give you all the time in the world I had it but I don't you have to be sure because it may not be I know what if it doesn't happen? it doesn't matter what if it doesn't matter? you know dad well what I'm talking about look at me here I'll be the happiest man in the world family child with you but it's not the most important thing the most important thing is this right now and if it does happen now and if you change your mind it's too late for me the father I had the kind of role model I had you won't be like your father won't be like your father lost your cell phone ring it's Paolo but you okay? know where it is we'll go there right now he's in a car accident and needs help he doesn't want to scare Lucia lights out she gets wet whenever she smells the skin of whom she desires man she desires people enjoys the different kinds of flesh yet things that from women she gets more affection and conversation and are not very interested in hearing about her dreams her plans, her professional success the ambition to expand out of the comfort zone that her family provided her when she was young she's a winner she's already opening her third hair salon and her parents are very proud they feel all they invested has paid off ballet classes swimming classes strips abroad, private schools therapy when her dad noticed she was beginning to act out she even did her masters at the European school for cosmetology in Argentina her mom used to straighten her hair since she was a little girl she used to say that her daughter was practically white and that straight her straight hair suited her better if I didn't straighten my hair I couldn't have the ballet but like all the other girls so she straightened it and the rest of the world the world coach shopped in her face the black girl she was which her white mom stopped her from seeing appreciated friendship more that's why she married my father people were against her decision of marry a black dude but she wanted she was almost 30 and didn't want to be known as the single aunt then my dad showed up all handsome hard working good job treated her like a queen she didn't think twice soon enough they were married my dad loved my mom so much he glued a picture of her on the back of his work idea when he had lunch with the guys he would always turn that picture towards them they would always ask that's my woman would say hey motherfucker I wanted to marry my daughter's father but you know how it goes the big juicy hard cock goes away on that first sleepless midnight fever or even sooner the woman becomes unbearable due to those pregnancy hormones he laughed me alone at night only once I didn't give him the chance to do it again told him to get the fuck out he should have listened when my mom said it was hard finding a good black man like my father a handy man for books, wagons for a long time the money was good I played samba and shuldu at certain concepts he liked to call functional for example he liked it when my brother showed up with white chicks and didn't like a cousin of mine, our neighbor his sister son who had an afro and dated black girls he thought he was more presentable to have a haircut like my brother's well-tuned that way with a short hair a white girlfriend the black man was less provocative after strictly following my mother's guidelines to not hang out with my black classmates I was still not considered pretty by my white friends but since my mom was a child of who I was I was too ashamed to tell her about the aggressions I suffered all my lovers are white even when there are women they are white the majority of them are almost white I dated this guy who had drug problems my dad, my dad was a guest but not my mom she'd say that I should be patient for God's help he'd recover his family would be so grateful that they would easily accept me I wouldn't have the same problems my dad had to be accepted into the family I asked her, what do you mean? I was not only fulfilling my mother's desire of whiting the family I was almost white why would his family have any difficulty in accepting me when my mother used her practical determined lawyers is there to say whites always know who's black black folks are the ones who get confused days weeks and months went by with a hammering me I stopped straightening my hair when it got really curly my dad smiled from ear to ear hugged me and told me I look beautiful and they were so bizarre to me if my dad really thought I was such a beautiful black girl why did he like white women so much why did he marry my mother why was he so proud of all the white women he used to date and why was he so thrilled by all my brother's white girlfriends I began uncovering the answers I started to understand why was happy because of my personal achievements and to provide a space of freedom for you my client to have whatever hair you desire here you can die cut straightened curl get your afro picked get braids anything you want that every woman who sits on this chair may feel like she's being treated leaving all her sorrow and pain behind feeling renewed light and rip her blessings sometimes when depression when depression takes over I ask myself what's the point in having all these hair salons numerous employees bills paid money to travel and dress the way I like if I don't have someone to love things like men are frightened by my strength I'm attracted to it at least not for anything more than sex the women I meet and I'm attracted to are sometimes as sexist as the men they size up my clothes and the rest made me generous speaking I think I intimidate people I put up a shield saying to protect my daughter but honestly is to protect myself time has taught me that my life doesn't need to revolve around her that there is still a woman here hidden behind the mother I want someone who will be my friend my friend a partner who protects me respects my daughter and walks side by side with me who isn't threatened by my success and accept my weaknesses because acting is wrong all the time tiring strength creates a barrier for affection to grow ideal love is very affectionate complicit present open to doing things together but it's hard it seems like the only kind of love out there for show it's all image and empty inside for now I'm going solo just me in my bag because it's better to be alone than in bad company Memo one when the mind is set to delirium Quata enters we hear her distant voice as if through pipes filled with air her body, inert has become a kind of box her lucid conscience rests sometimes wrapped in deep memories other times delirious what day is today I always forget to not care about what day it is how long do I need until I can stop caring about what day is today where did this all start is there a beginning or do things just jade state from latency to manifestation was I always what I am today so what in me would have been expendable how much dead weight have I born all these years in the state I am I do not remember I live my memories I hear the voices smell the rain about to fall on the grass my mother is the age that I am today scene three control the uncontrollable anticipating luck Paula and Quata four months before right after Quata was diagnosed Quata carries a suitcase alongside her purse I know exactly what you think Clara but you cannot do that to Isabelle I do not have time you know better than me what is going to happen next now get out of my way you cannot do that to her I am not being selfish Paula what do you think that I did not think this through but I am anticipating things one, if it is true that I love Isabelle two, if it is true that Isabelle loves me three, if loving is to wish what is best for the other person for the other person then there is no agreement should try to avoid my suffering by staying by my side and I will try to avoid hers by staying far away from her that is why you are here now not to confuse me I wish I pray you never have to see things this clear Isabelle, what say you carrying groceries I found the organics the secret is to get there early now we know Hi Paula, I am glad you are here I bought the greenest greens so fresh you can even smell the earth in them broccoli, Malabar spinach the greenest spinach in the world it is good for your blood I got these organic gala apples they are so expensive but I got them anyways I am not going to start saving now I got our Kasha potatoes the queen of potatoes like the wealthy cousin of potatoes and red potatoes and I got eggplant that you love baby why are you here is there any news, did you find out something new what is the suitcase for you said you didn't need to stay in the hospital plan on what is the suitcase for did I take too long in the market did I take too long you didn't feel well I am going to get someone who can deliver the organics we need someone to deliver the organics Isabelle no, Isabelle no, no way happiness is cruel we should be able to forget it as soon as it is over you will have to forget philosophizing, Clara you are philosophizing, this isn't philosophy stop playing around actually, over two years I wanted to get rid of you but I don't know how but now it is time for me you are too intense you are too much of a rider for me everything for you is I need lightness I am tired of you telling me what to do all the time following me around all the time and telling me what is best for me controlling my life, I don't have a life I want to enjoy my last moments and do whatever I want with what is left I want a controlling excessive woman on top of me all the time it doesn't even have her own life sex with everyone I am tired of you and of this bubble we live in you don't need to do this you don't need to lie you are not even good at pretend that you are this horrible despicable person that you will never be are you sure? is this what you want? I want to know, is this what you want? a decent person is exactly what I want believe don't say it Clara grabs her suitcase and walks to the door no, we will be together till the end you two are crazy you almost killed me the only time that has passed is the time not lived time when lived remains extensive eternal the child that I was I never stopped being my mom is still here with me inside of me things can happen again continuously scene 4 memo 2, the eternal ballerina it's the beginning of Isabel and Clara's romance about 13 months before her death life before the science hi, Pina Bausch how are you, Pina Bausch how many times have I told you Pina Bausch that your place is guaranteed amongst the world's biggest choreographers and she'd take a break sometime and have some tea feel in this very special moment of your life when your wife just got the murder surprise for best choreographer in dance I feel um, exactly how I felt the first moment I met her the happiest woman in the world and do you get a prize for that? every day will be ah, you gotta be interested that hospital is driving me insane honestly, if it wasn't for dancing I think I would have gone mad how are you, lovebirds what do you think? can you believe there's no interphone between floors? 6 floors the biggest hospital in real no interphone and I need to know if the orthopedist has already taken care of the poor guy in front of me do we hospitalize him or not? do we need surgery or not? ah, the doctor will only get here at 2pm everything seems so difficult for everyone so I come back 2.30pm, where's the doctor and this guy is almost dying but he's taking selfies imagine me going up and down 5th floor, 7th floor 5th floor, 7th floor, checking if the doctor what time that best 6.30pm at night 6.30pm the afternoon movie 6.30pm the night test this is how this country works when it comes to public service I'm so stressed! my teacher or not you know, I shouldn't have introduced you both because you are always disrupting my class you know what? I wish I had her left Isabel, I wish I had her left the other day she called me because she was feeling anxious it's like what happened? you want to know what her big dilemma was? she didn't know she didn't know if she should end a sentence using spontaneous or instantaneous come on Isabel Is that a dilemma? instantaneous I don't have to know this but today is Wednesday yes, and it was Friday I woke up at 5 this woman with Botox exploding on her face an old dude that fell in the shower and this guy this guy was knocked by a car because he was running after a kite I picture what my life looks like I'm going to class on Thursdays you two are perfect characters I don't even need to write anything do you want to dance? no, it's alright I'm leaving dancing doesn't do you and nothing will do you want to smoke a joint? yes seeing sits when a science becomes symptoms badly rehearsals clota and pal are rehearsed with no music again they dance it's better than the first time they finish let's do it one more time they start again with music now the music starts playing clota doesn't finish the movements with the same beauty she did before her movements seem to get a bit more rigid follow, notice is her do you need a break? what happened? you're working too hard you're hurting yourself what's wrong? cramps? eating to eat bananas and you want to teach me that Clara sit down I'm fine really 24 hours 1,440 minutes 86,400 seconds 7 days 10,080 minutes 604,800 seconds 30 days 302,400 minutes 2,592,000 seconds fine you should take that more seriously I'm rehearsing in the afternoons teaching in the morning and directing in the night fuck that fuck that I'm not telling you that nothing is more important than your health and that your fucking health is the only thing that you fucking have right, I'm not your mother and I'm not a child either you're not a child so I need to keep telling you that you don't seem healthy at all I am healthy your health is kind of fucked up my fucking health is doing so fucking okay your fucking health is fucked up and you're the only war pretending not to see what's going on have you gone and fucked yourself up today? not yet unfortunately the sky turns dark at noon Paula's office three months after the first symptoms Paula with a nape badge and a stethoscope so nice remembering that that was the first time I smoked a joint in my life first and last my blood pressure went down and you know I think it's the energy surrounding drug trafficking I love you in your book kind of supporting character decided to become a lead a character full of vanity it's a pet as a baby are you still trying to be? of course you're believing God though the book, God, children in a row, what are you trying to say? did you find out something? is there something wrong? are there any tests we should be doing? but yes, there is something we still have to investigate however, there is a possible diagnosis for Clara that is no piece of cake here well, tell me what is it? amyotrophic lateral sclerosis that's impossible are you sure? no, I'm not even sure I'm alive well how did you well how did you get to that? okay I'm coding here so we can talk for a bit if things keep going in this direction all of the tests were negative I know, that's the problem one of the signs of ALS they can't conform to any other diagnosis it's a very mysterious that's impossible, tell me it's not true I wish I could well if you wish it then say it I can't let you, I'm a doctor patients love lies patients partners love lies but then it's the doctor's fault need a lie, just a small little lie so you can cope with it it's a clue scene 11, memo 3 trauma is a moment that repeats at the turn of time fragment of Clara's memory Clara now uses a walking stick one of her arms is hanging, rigid, without movement the neurons stopped communicating I did this we stopped communicating what? amyotrophic lateral sclerosis ALS I would say A, Clara understood B I would say B, Clara understood A it's wrong, there's something wrong look at me, I'm good, I'm great fuck this, a brain can't perform movement I wanted to control everything she was suffocating the body stops I did this to her the mind stays intact that's completely so why me? indonatically predispose people, they excess a glutamate my god they're killing us by the mouth very frequent in athletes and dancers don't exaggerate baby you exaggerate it's the best aside until when my god patients like Stephen Hawking origin of the universe there was a huge campaign the ice bucket challenge we do need it to we donate it to the campaign why did you want to donate to the campaign? did I know? you're gonna have to be strong it is about right that literature will save you love is gonna save you Paula, we have plans we have so many plans our speech becomes distorted alright alright it will happen Clara, are you feeling something? try to speak slowly the book of regrets Clara and Isabel are home months after their first symptoms and before the diagnosis is confirmed in Clara's memory the desire to relive life I won't say that I wish I could begin again but I do I wish I could rewrite the book of regrets I could do it better no doubt I just didn't know I do it better every time I remember the problem is that it only happens inside of me I told you you needed to protect yourself shut up it's not me, it's not you we chose something really hard you don't believe in it deep down, you don't believe in it maybe not that never kept me from fulfilling your desire my desire I don't need you in order to be a mother you don't need me for anything that's not really what you're gonna say to me you're not gonna say yes, I need you you're the mother of my child Isabel you talk as if life was gonna end tomorrow relax we're young, we have all the time in the world says who? or will you not be the mother of my child I will be whatever you want me to just never thought about being a mother it was never my dream there's 7 billion people in the world why add another do you want it to be over after you you're the end line you're the grand finale so as many times as you'd like that's what I'm here for no, that's not what you're here for go away, don't talk like that go away you have no idea what you're saying I don't want you in my life you're selfish I despise you the scene begins again Clara changes it in her mind I told you you needed to protect yourself shut up it's not me it shows something really hard deep down you don't believe it deep down you don't believe it maybe not but that never kept me from fulfilling your desire my desire don't need you in order to be a mother don't be unfair with me, Isabel I'm with you I want to have this baby with you I love you and I'm not gonna let you be unfair with me because this will pass your anger will pass and we'll still be together it won't pass soon enough you'll be sick and our chances will be over shit, the scene restarts Clara changes it in her mind again I told you you needed to protect yourself shut up it's not me it's not you, we chose something really hard you don't believe in it deep down you don't believe in it I've always believed in it so much that we're here this treatment costed a fortune and we're here you're gonna talk to me about money right now shit the scene restarts in a new attempt of Clara's to restore the past I told you you needed to protect yourself shut up I'm gonna go downstairs I'm gonna buy a cigarette and I'll be right back you don't smoke shit the scene restarts one more time I told you you needed to protect yourself shut up doesn't go up the scene restarts the scene restarts scene 13 complete and utter impotence right after the diagnosis I promise you with all my heart I'll never walk in heels again ever I'll never wear lipstick again no not lipstick she loves it when I wear lipstick I can't promise that I'll never wear any sort of makeup I promise I'll go up the stairs at St. Pena's church I'll go all the way up I'll let my hair grow and donate it to kids with cancer every year for the rest of my life I promise I'll forgive my father I'll find a way I swear I'll forgive that asshole you don't like it when I call him that asshole he was an asshole but you don't like it when I say that right this isn't you fucking me over because I haven't forgiven him right God would never be vengeful it's not because we're lesbians either right no God's not a bishop I promise you I promise you anything I'll give all my money I'll give all my money to people in need I don't have that much but I'll I'll give it my Italian classes I'll donate it I'll write a book about this disease it's gonna help a lot of people I swear that's easy you can't can't swear on easy things I'll do a campaign for the government to release funding for this disease I'll go through with this I promise anything to you fuck everything this fucked up shit you son of a bitch insulting females bitch is not an insult you're a son of a politician a politician no I don't like insulting sons either you're a colonel not here don't you think I noticed leave the bad ones here they steal, they kill they're evil and you leave them here and my wife is the best person in the world she is good she is kind she is generous she is smart, she is talented she has to survive she has to stay on planet earth because she has so many things to do you don't know the beauty of the things she has to do here on earth I demand you take this back you dare take clout away from me you don't want to listen to me you don't want to mess with me you don't know what I'm capable of for the love of God your love selfish you don't think about us you don't think about what you've done take a good look at what you've done two kids sleeping on the sidewalk 30 meters away a woman sleeping on the sidewalk at the amount of perverse people stealing from the elders stealing from the poor to buy yachts taking my wife the meaning of my life are you fucking kidding you can't do this you can't be this mistaken you cannot you cannot you can't scene 14 inventory now we are inside clout us consciousness little before her death you are right you are always right oh right my love my darling isabel we spend our entire lives not knowing that the only thing that we really have is time nothing else in three months here inside of this room I missed the sun I almost went to patagonia to see the aurora royales almost took scuba diving lessons I should have had sex with you every day during this year should have slept naked next to you every day during these years should have insisted in you and in this baby I was scared instead of making excuses why didn't we travel last year we were sleeping with my doctor aren't you you should marry her and I shouldn't be jealous of you who cares if you had sex with somebody else or not life is so much more than that no that's a lie it burns my stomach to know that I will die and you will get married to my doctor I cannot under any circumstance see your bed you have to move houses after I die and never let the address slip out of your mouth when you pray for me always pray for me around nature okay so even though I hear your prayers I don't see your house will you donate all my books to my dancers you'll be so happy they'll think you're great they should have written dedication staying but another thing they didn't think of doing will you fill my ashes in the ocean what do you think of that right I'm in love you need to forgive your father from here I'm forgiving everybody I think I'll have enough time we have to keep fighting and going to the protests and you cannot fall for the oh she's dead I should know not single right left and put lips to God always I want you beautiful always so everybody can look at you and say wow what a beautiful woman clad ahead thank you for giving me this love I could have lived 80 years but if I hadn't lived this love it would have been worse than dying at 32 seeing 16 palace of memories heartbeat sounds I don't have anything left but it's not true that I don't have anything left I learned that I don't have anything but it's not true that I don't have anything my mother's face when I while I'm in your chest looks like a birdman closer while playing hide and seek hide under the piano it seems like the entire state building looked from below from the sidewalk below is beautiful you know I have forgotten how it feels to be under under the table we over the grown-up's talk and are still protected the table is the kids very old French I miss the apple and the palm of my hand I miss snicking my teeth and and feeling the juice run down the roses I smell at the yellow hamburger they're miraculous made with me can you believe it can also feel the sea circumventing my skin at the lafismenda's beach I think about it too hard the lafismenda's beach still burns my retina I have to remember in sunglasses I can still feel my sister's hands maneuver little and stare at this guy looking for the three sisters it was a chubby hand I feel it I feel it too well my body is an infinite map of unbreakable memories when I walked the streets outside looking for a carnival costume I didn't know it was a palace of memories that the man that the man who would stumble upon me carrying a card of vice was also a palace of memories and then I made love to you we were two palaces of memories and that's why I love you and your dad and your brothers and all of your ancestors your complete resting stage showed me more of my body my cells, my memories than all of these years dancing in front of a mirror there's a redness on my back it's from a meeting my dad gave me from flip-flops on my back there's a scared scratch that still stains from the zipper of my 16 birthday dress the lady screaming in the night the lady the corner the great lady I still hear my mom crying at the saint's feet I still hear your moan the forest orgasm I gave you I still hear on my body everything that has happened it's still happening my mother rest escapes from my mouth while I sleep in her warm lap and the milk drips off my chin the heartbeat sound becomes linear end of play to the uptime a slave's homeland is revolution resistance for the sake of a future that is already in the past our show has come to an end our artwork under construction now sees we wipe off our makeup our costumes our rehearsed intentions the text rests the body takes a breath and we go back home each one of us hoping on to our own past we use the stage in self-defense we bargain for a slice of the cake of this world serving at the table our hushed pains and turning our flash into a tool for change so there's a little panel with the playwrights and the directors and part of the group so thank you for coming and staying and that was that was a great great presentation I think really amazing so Michael do we have Anna Maria with us do we have a Skype connection okay we are calling Marcia so hello to Anna Maria hello can you hear us yeah I'm hearing you so you are in Sao Paulo or in so were you able to see the reading did you hear were you able to hear the reading could you follow it on live stream we soon come to all of you Anna Maria what comes to your mind when you hear that collection of readings here in New York what comes to your mind when you saw the readings and heard the readings what were you thinking and thank you again for taking the time and stay with us but maybe the same question to the two other um playwrights and Marcia how does it feel like hearing this work here in New York I feel myself very well hahaha hahaha hahaha but I cry I cry really cry with you girls thank you so much thank you Tia James thank you girls we are all lucky guys because we have Frank hahaha thank you now it's an honor to have you here I'm in this hard time we don't know very well in we can what we can believe and I believe in the god of meetings and I think the god of meetings and lives here at Hegel Center I suspect and he loves you hahaha thank you all you all here tonight good evening I will speak in Portuguese which is more comfortable for you to hear too I'll be speaking in English it's a little more comfortable and sorry excuse me translator hat and it's a little more comfortable for her and for you and for me for them to listen to I since the beginning thank you girls since the beginning I had a very good expectation to hear the text in another language from the beginning I always had great expectations to hear the text in another language and these expectations were attended because the parts that were chosen these expectations were met because the parts that were chosen they are very vigorous they are very impressive and I think they can be recognized in every African jazz they are very vigorous they are very vigorous and impacting and they have a strong they are very vigorous they are very vigorous in the African diaspora thank you to the director how did you put all this together how did you organize orchestrated and what do you feel about this place I think for the most part I just did I did a lot of listening and I am not Brazilian I've never been to Brazil and to just hear hear the stories and then the cast and these women just really taking my cue from them so seeing what was important to them and how they felt and I mean quite honestly it's a wonderful opportunity for me to learn and grow and so I feel honored that I was asked to do it so I think our process was really as organic as it can be open conversations and just listening seeing what's important, what's there what's the story yeah it really did feel it worked really hard a lot of love and work went into this reading I think we all could sense that and also the urgency that came with it we heard about love and death we heard about rape poverty, about race relations about the role of women maybe a question also again to the players and also to the actors Fabi Stubbs, Ana Maria what does this place make are these Brazilian plays something specific Brazilian in these excerpts we heard tonight or do you think they are more universal are these these plays do you feel what makes these plays Brazilian what makes them specifically Brazilian a way that only our experience like a woman living in this place of the world I believe can do it I don't know if you have something very specific have something that can be shared with a lot of women anywhere thank you baby a question also to our Brazilian the actors again thank you for all the work you put in them shining through like a crystal something very clear and light as someone said like poetry should be clear like an icicle light like a bird's foot at the same time is that something a Brazilian quality you all live here I think in New York these are messages from your country written also by women how did that feel to you all just for me just so funny because when I read their work it was just I could see these plays and these sacks being done here in New York and I could see that people would I don't know feel this story and connect to this story like very easily so yeah they are plays placed in Brazil they are written by Brazilian playwrights but it's just yeah it's like Ana Maria said this drama and this pain and this struggle so yeah totally I agree I think it's universal and I think us we have this as an objective to bridge this and to show and to translate and to share this plays that everyone in this room can relate to but of course it's made in Brazil and it comes from Brazilian people and there is a certain degree of... the things that are made in a Brazilian plays like when he talks about the soccer team but like the core of the story it can be American totally it's true I was just going to say that I think the few she would mention the St. Pena's church like a few things that are very local to Brazil and the Brazilians are very familiar with and I think the international audiences would be like what is this but I think the core is human and that's everywhere and that's important to say as well that the universal doesn't exist itself by itself it's a construction all the time maybe a couple of words to the plays themselves maybe to the playwrights we start with you, you and then why did you write that specific play and what was the idea behind it tell us a bit more about the idea the play and your intention with it maybe I can answer the other questions universal question because to me now it's very important to put on the scene two lesbian two girls in love because we have in this time at Brazil developing development of the fundamentalism religious who are LGBT persons are fighting against them fighting against them so in this time this is the Brazilian play because Brazil is LGBT country and get out Michel Temer, get out Marcelo Crivella get out Bigfoot now she's stating the name of the president and a few politicians maybe about also about the play I speak in Portuguese in this case in this piece I engraved it and learned to fly without wings we worked with 55 interviews to different black women for my play for Sijinha's play got pregnant gave birth to horses and learned how to fly without wings is they interviewed 55 different women different black women these women lived and worked in areas that were concentrated with as a black woman these women lived and worked concentrated with as a black community and black women we interviewed women that worked in hair salons in Samba schools arenas women who were incarcerated women who were homeless and from these interviews and the interviews were conducted by Oscrespos who then did the first production of the play they from these interviews Brazil from these interviews the six different archetypes of six different characters were created he's thank you Ana Maria your play diverse also as a even it was like a tiny very personal intimate play it was the hologram almost of a society and I think almost you switched like the men and female role so but tell us a bit about that play is that a hope personal or universal is it yeah relating to us and not trying to look for the perfect relation but the possible relation let's see what we can do with what we have I think that's it I'd like to only to to make people talk which other about what they are feeling about what they are living what it is the possible and not only the perfect why they can leave and proportionate the others thank you before we come also to audience question maybe one question I mean we heard a bit the current political situation in Brazil how what does it put on your work what you create on your the atmosphere and feeling of working in Brazil or being here about here and what that's to all of you what how does it how does it connect the art and politics personal life professional life I just feel like as a Brazilian artist living in New York to see what's happening in Brazil for me it's very frustrating in the sense that I feel that I cannot do anything from here we want to like do something so for us like to find this place and to come up with this collective it is our way to to try to communicate these stories and to give voices not give voices just like serve as a vessel for like this work and I don't know it's just and for us I don't know for like as actors as well like as Brazilian actors living in New York we have this feeling that we need to create our own opportunities otherwise we are going to be the maid or we are going to be whatever the whore thank you and for us it's just like very important for us to create our opportunities do you want to say something about the seat I think it's very important at this moment that art is attentive and in some way dialogue with the political situation that we are living in it's very important to me that the art is aware and can dialogue with politics and the situation that we are having in our country right now with all of the fascist happenings that are going on in our country art has become do you not have a dialogue and not answer to that and not try to like fight against it I think that every author is writing and responding to their country but what's going on around them it's very clear that these kinds of conservatism, this wave of conservatism and this totalitarian that's going on in the world is not just happening in Brazil we are totalitarian leaders I think we end up creating every aesthetic that we create is an aesthetic of resistance Tia, do you think those plays could be staged in New York would there be an audience actors come, what is your feeling yeah, I think definitely and I think part of what we've been talking about before is that these pieces, the stories them being universal them being things that we all can connect to there's not much new under the sun I think that it's a beautiful way when given the opportunity to invest in someone else's culture in someone else's story and then realizing that oh, that's my story too so I think not only could they be done they should be done of course that doing those kinds of stories I think opens us up to the investment in someone else's story I think just breaks our own limitations and our barriers of oh, it's just me, it's all about me or my family, my family's history no, it's how we're all actually the same that I think that I think is the thing that we need to realize in order to love each other better so not just advocating for myself and my story in helping someone else's will push me force me, help me grow me in helping someone else tell their story and those stories were told so beautifully, they're beautifully written I think these are great artists, the writers people always go on and on how great it is to do a touchstone but write a play write a really good play and that's how hard that is and I think the high quality of these plays from Brazil today and also our other Brazil evening which we did with the other Marcia they just showed that there is incredible energy and creativity and we do not know enough but maybe Michael if we can put out a bit more light up for the audience and we're proud of our audience we have a great audience and I hope we didn't talk too much but we really would also like to hear from you and a man will go around with the microphone not only that we hear you better but also we do record it and it's live streamed to São Paulo so you can also hear what we say so maybe say very shortly who you are one sentence and then a question to the audience to whoever you feel right so is there a question or could be a comment you know Hi, I'm Patricia, I'm a friend of Marcia's one of the things I kept thinking about from our Brazilian culture is Brazilian television, we have how Brazilian television still dominates sort of popular Brazilian culture telenovelas and the depiction of different peoples of different classes of different races there's so many stereotypes still to this day and what I kept thinking about was how honest and true these plays were totally the opposite of what we see over and over and over again in Brazilian television I just wanted to share that sure, that's true fantastic another comment or question Hi, good evening my name is Cameron I'm actually going to school he needs to apply to theatre programs this is really fascinating to me but as a black American woman I think it was really interesting in the homeless women and the hair salon owner in particular this idea of love but particularly as it relates to social trauma in other words it's very personal where I think the rejection that was coming my interpretation was very socially driven I don't know if that's something you would like to talk about or speak about or if that's just my own interpretation of it can you just make it a little bit clear if you have a question on that because I got your comment you rephrase the question not even if it's a question but I guess maybe the validity of that do you think that's more of a social trauma or is it more personal or how do those relate or talk to each other the idea the intention was to reflect this social trauma the idea was to reflect this social trauma as I said we worked with 55 women with 55 women women and from these testimonies we built these six characters as I said before we interviewed 55 women and from their interviews we created this piece based on six of them so each character is an archetype of situations, of stories of experiences of groups between these 55 so each one of these six is an archetype of a group of women who had similar stories and were in similar situations I just want to say something as an actress when I read these monologues I feel that every black woman can find herself in this play there were like six characters and because there was like all this research and when I read the hair salon honor I saw my story my mom is white my dad is black and all this that happened to me but that pain happened to me you know so I think it's very easy for any black women to see in this play some other over here hi I'm Noemi I studied with three of these beautiful ladies and I just wanted to say thank you and me as an actress and artist as well it's such a great inspiration and I'm so proud of you and I was very moved and I think it's amazing work and I'm very interested in reading more and I would love to read all the plays I just wanted to say thank you I love you maybe a question to also to Anna Maria I know you also write novels you write essays what does it mean for you to write a theater play what's the difference or what do you do in theater what you don't do in other forms why do you think this should be a play it's like writing in three times I see the difference and I always are generals because if a novel isn't ours anymore when you publish it and everyone who reads it owns it in its own way a play everything has to be more generals and you have to give the space so that the director and the director and everybody who will work on it gives its own interpretation and makes it of her or of his own really own, okay it's not mine anymore I think that I'm just some kind of a a framework that the story passes through and it really goes away it's a very interesting way to tell a story through any other else not me some other comments or questions over there let's just wait the microphone hello I mean again I just wanted to say thank you so much and at some point you come from Brazil and that's your inspiration I kind of got that it was about Brazil because it talks to so many cultures you know from the oh my god from you and you know like the women, like men feeling intimidated by successful women that talks to so many cultures by having frustration at public hospitals that happens in so many countries you know because of relationships because of disease it happens to like all of us and I just, yeah it was very touching and like it really connected to all that, yeah it really comes it happens everywhere and it was beautiful to see it thank you, thank you guys there are motorcycles right on the streets there are so many motorcycles hello hello, sorry I'm almost out of voice but firstly thank you secondly I would love to congratulate girls that's beautiful I've been like following the work congratulating the writers to the civil for bringing it all I have two questions actually one for the ladies so what's next oh my god, no we need a break I'll send the two questions and the other ones for the playwright so how the play was received in Brazil since they touched very sensitive subjects especially now if you had some sort of retaliation of some sorts just say like the plays were received in Brazil maybe we start with the plays I just want to make clear that diverse, they didn't have a production in Brazil was a premiere reading this is, yeah wow, this was a world premiere reading at the Siegel Center wow, yeah I'll answer we have a special thanks to do to my friend Paulo Verlins who is directed I'm the director of the editing in Brazil and he invited me to write about this theme or her I have a special thanks to do to the director of the play who actually invited Marcia to write this play the first production was at a cultural center in Rio that is open to every accessible to people from all around Rio we had the incredible opportunity to see old women who frequent these community centers crying when they saw two lesbian women on stage the play is very important, it was very shocking for us to see that because the purpose of the play necessarily isn't to write but it's actually the opposite we ended up having a conversation with people who otherwise would not want to be exposed to these plays and end up having a conversation with people who have preconceived ideas of LGBTQ community I saw that this was my way of doing art and activism at the same time simply by sharing these stories this play is part of a trilogy by Oscrespos that investigates the af I think it's like affection relationship in the black community so we end up building a community and a public together with the black community with the objective of creating a black audience of black members and the audience of black members the play has been produced consecutively since 2013 and has had a very good acceptability especially within the younger community Anna Maria you wrote also other plays so how is the reception of your writing your dissecting of these relations what do audiences think as here a meaning for this story and I think this is what moves me to write for theater we have so many wonderful artists here just waiting for the opportunity to show their work I think that's like if I have the Emmy last year we are good we are very good we just need some opportunity to write for us and thinking about us and not creating stereotypes and not don't knowing how to deal with problems that are specific to the black community then these reasons have shown me that I am in the right way so that's what moves me that's what I want to continue to do thank you and I'm sure you're your place will find an audience internationally I'm very much so thank you thank you and theater is something great because it is a model and if something happens on stage and some people talk it could happen in life people can talk that's why some people don't like on the stage but maybe before we come to the future plans of your collective one last question from the audience good job everybody so this question is for Cinda Ciginia say it again Ciginia listening to your work this is a very personal question not very personal I wanted to know if your content around the African diaspora or the black woman if that's something that you have always as an artist was that your natural sensibility within your text in your work or is it is it more of a focus is it a spiritual thing just for myself as an artist listening to your characters and the experiences should you okay listening to the experiences of people of African descent they are the same everywhere in every country so I wanted to know if the blood of your work is something you can't escape from it naturally comes or it's like this is what I want to do this is important to me is it more head or is it more hard time I know that's a tough one well I think that the two things together it's important to say that this work was a work made by command both of them together in a way but it's important to say that this work was commissioned commissioned thank you the group asked me to write this play as an answer as the writer of several books and as all of my plays being a black woman defines my place in the world or the rationality that interests me the most and from that place I speak of whatever interests me with the tone the rhythm the fire and everything the rationality and thank you so to the future what's the tell us a little bit maybe coming to the end but tell us a little bit about your collective when it starts what's the idea how old is it what are you doing now and what you're planning to do our collective is old like three months I think really yeah three months we started like July 31st so this is a little bit of birthing yes so I think like for the next year we definitely want to do a full production we've been talking about writing plays for us someone said something about that but we yeah we definitely want to do more readings because I think it's like a good start like to get like the audience to come we want to do full production productions and we want to do short films and whatever we can to like do this and like different medias and I think it's important for us to kind of bring you know Brazilian artists in with us but also kind of work in the American scenario and work with American artists and work working with Tia I think was very important to us because we needed to kind of you know bridge that that world and not bring these Brazilian texts that were translated by us as well and we you know we that's super important to us so yeah I also want to say that it is so hard to be an artist it really is and it's so hard to make this you know it's really not easy and you see these wonderful women like we are all together in this and thank you Tia and I really want to thank from my heart like every single actor artist who worked with us because it's a struggle it's an everyday struggle with then like the need of putting out there and the need to create this to do it and surviving so thank you Frank thank you so much and thank you it's an honor for giving us this opportunity well I think maybe then it is a good cause to celebrate and to go to the reception which is in here it's on 36 I think right 35th you come out and just make a right and I think Anna Maria will watch with white headphones she will watch the reception and what we are drinking and what we talk about and maybe give us some comments right and so we will have a reception now and I hope you follow us on Skype when we have a beer and a wine but again thank you thank you all for coming and another applause for this great thank you we just have a few thank yous as the collective we wanted to thank the playwrights for coming all this way they all came from Brazil and it's you know it's a 10 hour flight and it's living in post quarters and it's it means a lot to us and so thank you so much for being here and Frank we cannot thank you enough for giving us this space and these artists and thank you Anna we have a flower for you here and and to our wonderful director yes we've never done this without you thank you thank you everyone have a good night thank you