 So it is just about Halloween, or as of this recording, it's just about Halloween. You people will be watching it on Halloween. But it's the spooky time of the year, you know? And so I figured I should do something horror related at least once in the month of October. And I haven't talked a lot about creepypastas before on this channel. And there's a couple of reasons for that. One just being that they're not usually very good. Most creepypastas just are terrible, if I'm being honest. And even the good ones that I enjoy are pretty formulaic, I'll admit. Like it's rare that you find one that really breaks the mold at all. And it's even rare to find one that breaks the mold and is a good story. So I just don't want to talk about them that much, you know? I don't have a whole lot to say. For those unfamiliar, quick primer, way back when internet forums were still a thing, people used to have these stories that they would just post over and over again. And most of them were meant to be funny. And since they would just be copied and pasted over and over again, people started calling them copypastas. And I don't think that term is used very much anymore. But some of these copypastas were also like spooky stories. Like the time I ran into a ghost, or the time I saw something weird in the woods. And so people start calling them creepypastas. And nowadays the term has broadened to basically just mean any short story that people write on the internet that is supposed to be horror. And, you know, like I said, most of them are bad, but there are a couple of good ones in there. Today, however, I would like to talk to you about the worst creepypasta that exists. You know, not ones that are meant to be like a parody or anything. So it's bad on purpose. Like this was genuinely meant to scare people and it failed on basically every level. It's called Happy Happy. And it's all about this dude who remembers an old creepy children's TV show and he watches a couple episodes of it and he's like, whoa, this is creepy. And then some other stuff happens. So this creepypasta does basically everything wrong that it could possibly do wrong. Like for starters, it's just in a genre, which is stupid. And I know people don't really think of creepypastas as having genres, but there's a bunch of them. And this particular instance is a creepy cartoon or creepy children's show. Like, I believe Candle Cove is the one that really started the trend. At least it's the most popular. But then other people started copying it and they did stuff like Squidward Suicide. And it's like, oh, it's the character from SpongeBob, but he's doing violent creepy shit. Woo, boo boo doo, that's scary. They have one for the Simpsons as well. And then Happy Happy is, you know, not a real TV show, but it's saying like, oh, it's meant for kids, but it has like all this murder and blood. Woo, scary. But then other genres are like the main character is trapped somewhere and he's writing this story down as a warning for other people and somehow it got on the internet. There's a mysterious door or mysterious stairs up here somewhere and the main character goes through them. There's main character finds some weird creature in a secluded location and nearly dies. Usually it's in the woods. You know, they find some weird creature in the woods and then run away and they're like, hey, stay away from the woods in this area. There's spooky ritual, which is where they just, it's a set of instructions and it's like do all this stuff and you'll summon a spirit and then you get one wish. But if you mess up, you get dragged down to hell. Like, you know, that sort of thing. There's a bunch of those. There's haunted electronics of some sort. Like usually haunted websites or haunted video games and actually Happy Happy does have some elements of that in there. But then there are all other examples would be stuff like Sonic.exe which is one of the worst creepypastas. I don't know, it's not as bad as Happy Happy in my opinion but it's probably top five worst. Or Ben Drowned, which I believe kicked off the trend. There's the standard like just ghosts. You know, they see a ghost somewhere and they're like, whoa, that's scary. Once in a blue moon, you'll see one about aliens. And then there's of course just the main characters insane. Watching me go around doing murders. Woo, I'm insane. Now, the thing about creepypastas that made them work for me when I was younger, because when I was like 13, I read a bunch of these. You know, it'd be like one in the morning, no one else was home and I'd just be reading through these and it would genuinely scare the crap out of me a lot of the time. And part of the reason for that is that you don't really know who's writing it and so that kind of helps you feel like maybe this could have really happened. Maybe this could be real. You know, like the person writing it is just some other dude on the internet. You know, or some other woman on the internet. Like just writing down, hey, this crazy thing happened to me. And if they do it right, then you can suspend your disbelief enough that oh, this maybe could have possibly happened. Like I mentioned, one of the genres is finding a weird creature in a secluded location and yeah, like if someone found some weird bigfoot-esque thing out in the woods, like I don't know if I'd believe them, but you know, put it in a certain context, there's a part of my brain that'll say, hey, maybe. And a problem a lot of creepypastas have is that they just go way over the top with it. Like once in a while, this can work admittedly, but a lot of times it's just, hey, I found this weird creature in the woods and then it murdered my entire family and destroyed a whole town, but the government's covering it up. Like that's harder to buy into. The only time I've read something like that that was creepypasta that really went all out like that and worked was the horror from The Vault. Like I think that one still works pretty well for a couple of reasons, but that's a separate discussion I think. Happy Happy does that as well. You know, it's a shitty genre. It goes way over the top with it to the point where it's unbelievable. It's way too long. Like creepypastas should not be long in my opinion. They should be like short stories and pretty much anytime I see one and it's like, oh, part 72 of 134 I immediately turned off and even on the rare occasions I have actually gone through and read some of that, it's always terrible because it's like part 52. It happened again. I called the police for the third time and they came out and they're like, there's no monster here, but then the monster came out and it murdered one of the police and then dragged his body away and the other policeman turned to me and was like, yo, what happened? Why did you do that? Nobody believes me. Like it's always some really dumb shit like that. And it's terribly written as well. You know, you'll see what I mean as we go on. The main character is a dipshit and just basically everything that it can do wrong, it does wrong. And I guess I've done enough of an introduction. So let's get started. Here's happy happy February 23rd, 2011. Maybe. Hello, I will be using you because I am discovering about a show called happy happy one sentence in and we have grammatical problems. Now this whole story has grammatical problems spread throughout and it's not out of any stylistic choice that I've noticed or that I can figure out. Like it's just the author misspelled things. I don't, I don't know how or why you wouldn't spell check this, but okay. Sometime during 1999, Nickelodeon's morning block, Nick Jr. aired a new show called happy happy. It sounds like some nursery rhyme that a babysitter would sing, but it wasn't. It was a short show, 10 minutes, and was normally played in pairs, making each episode 20 minutes minus commercials. A month after it premiered, it was pulled off the air and was never aired again. Even its nicer episodes. However, some parents did record the show, but they were VHS copies. So basically he just goes through the whole introduction. Happy happy was a children's cartoon starring happy happy who looked like this and the show was just pulled off the air and never shown again and they never mention it. No one ever talks about it, which is him trying to add some plausible deniability. Say like, Hey, maybe this really did happen. But then the main character whose name we never learn. We never learn anything about him really is that he has some old VHS tapes and he watches some old episodes and that's basically how this starts. Now it's also worth noting that this is written as though it's a series of forum posts. Now that is a style of creepypasta that I've seen a bunch of times. I don't have much of an opinion on it. Like it's that said it is a style which can be done well or it can be done poorly. Ted the caver is a creepypasta where this that's also written in the style and it's done pretty well because the audience learns things along with the main character and at the end it has a really good cliffhanger which probably wouldn't work if it was written as like a regular novel or it's like a diary or anything like that. Whereas happy happy is that style done very poorly because he could have literally just written all this down after the fact and it wouldn't change much and it doesn't allow us to have an interesting beginning or an interesting ending or anything like that. It's literally just I felt like writing it this way. So here you go. So the main character watches a couple episodes of happy happy and then he starts describing them in excessive detail and that's actually a big part of why this creepypasta is so obnoxiously long is that he feels the need to describe every episode of happy happy in exacting detail even the ones which are not creepy because he mentions a bunch of them are just totally normal like a bunch of them are just happy happy shows up finds kids that like scrape their knees or something and gives them a bandaid and then turns to the camera and tells kids hey don't play in the street like you know like children's cartoon stuff. It's very mundane and you could literally just do that in a sentence or two but he he goes into excruciating detail about all those and then he goes into excruciating detail about the creepy episodes which um well it sounds like this one moment that could send chills down anyone's spine was the boo boo scene in episode four happy has a child that has a bruise on his knee he looks to the camera death stare on face and says what does Nate need for this beating for 30 seconds he stared at the camera motionless his dark blue soulless eyes locking on with anyone watching finally he spoke that's right a bandaid why did he need that long to speak I don't know the intros were cut out and the main episodes were missing a few scenes on episode three five minutes 12 seconds is when he does his first death stare slash evil smile for 30 seconds it was somewhat eerie also the out-of-place objects were getting more noticeable there was a news broadcast about a tsunami that recently struck Japan happy said oh no if you want to help the Japanese call this number and a 1-800 number was listed and that's the end of the first entry here's my question like this main character dude is apparently you know writing all this in real time why would he feel the need to make a forum post about this like at this point it's not creepy or anything really it's just a little unsettling and a little weird but honestly if I saw that in a children's cartoon I would just assume like okay they never finished making that especially because you know the show got canceled so I would just say okay they ran out of money or something like that and that's actually something that this myth this main character I wish I could give him a name I really do is very strange like for most creepy pastas having a main character with basically no personality is perfectly fine because like I said they're supposed to be real short and it's just oh I ran into this crazy thing what the hell happened here's my warning or here's my story to everyone else that you all know what happened which is fine and then there are some bigger ones that try to be more like a novel where they try to have the main character be like you know an actual character and have a personality and stuff but the thing is you need a lot of time to set that sort of thing up and I mean at that point you're basically just writing a regular novel and at that point you are kind of setting aside a lot of the strengths of internet horror so I would I just don't like it when people do that so then he watches the first like truly creepy episode and this happens it starts out with happy happy going around the playground telling kids about the cycle of life by cycle of life I meant frogs and plants the kids then said thanks happy but then smoke creeped behind happy so happy and the kids turned around the twin towers were burning up with people falling off there was a lot of screaming fire and a crashed airplane the tail could be seen sticking out of one of the towers it became clear this was 9-11 predicted two years before it happened I could see a faint whining noise and I think that was the plane then a piece broke off hitting and possibly killing someone and it goes on like that for another minute like a kid is trapped below the wreckage and happy happy leaves in there to die slowly and I'll admit it's a tad unsettling the way it's described but also I guess this confirms that happy happy is just an alter ego of George Bush and the thing is this creepypasta comes with visuals you know some of them will do that they'll have like little audio files or videos or something that someone makes and I mean I'm all for it but this one is very lazy it basically just shows this episode it's like nine minutes long like I'll probably link to it or something and it's terrible because the vast majority of those nine minutes is just either static images or rather images that are all blurry and fucked up so you can't really see what they are or just straight up a black screen with some sounds in the background and like look if you don't have the resources or the know-how to properly make a video like that to go along with your story then just don't do it you know you can even add to the creep factor and say something like the guy would say yeah I tried uploading these episodes but the files were always corrupted for some reason which is weird because it works fine when I try to watch them but they just won't upload and like that could maybe add to the creep factor or something just do something but I don't know the only part of those videos that was kinda creepy was this like that I'll admit did spook me a bit so then he calls the one eight hundred number to donate to the Japanese tsunami victims which is weird because this apparently aired in 1999 and the tsunami was until 2011 so I guess happy happy's predicting the future doesn't actually make any sense and he he pushed the button to donate and then they'll give him the happy happy badge in the mail and then it's just a lot of shit happens it's not that interesting like apparently happy happy can predict the future it mentions like the Libyan riots and such and then it goes into a bunch more detail about happy happy just murdering children in some episodes and being murdered by children in some episodes like at one point he gets in a car crash and then the kids start trying to kill him they say pull off his hat pull off his hat and they start pulling the stem off his head and like okay that I'll admit some of this imagery is kind of unsettling like if this author had combined that with a better story maybe they could have made something decent the main character also gets into contact with someone who sends him dvds of more episodes of happy happy because we really needed more of those and then he starts having nightmares about happy happy no reason for this is ever given you know it's not like a supernatural creature sending envisions or anything it's just he has nightmares okay and then a figure start just a figure is following him around okay that's the main thing a tall human looking figure which he doesn't have much detail on at this point and later he just starts referring to him as Shaquille O'Neal or Shaq because he's tall and it makes it basically impossible to ever take any of the scary scenes with this guy seriously like I'm just imagining Shaquille O'Neal there is the thing when you do that like you have if you're gonna give someone a nickname I think that's fine but it has to be like something that sounds kind of spooky you know even if it's a little cheesy that's fine but it has to sound creepy or spooky or scary or something you know like if you called him I don't know the host or something I don't know why you would call him that it's there's no real reason to give him that name in this book but the point is if you call him the host that would at least sound a little spooky you could do something with that but just Shaq that's a stupid name so skipping over a lot of shit which we don't need to talk about as I said a substantial portion of this is just the main character guy going over episodes of Happy Happy in excruciating detail including the ones which aren't scary okay like he's literally just describing a regular children's cartoon for a lot of this he finds out that the studio where they made Happy Happy was burned down a long time ago so he gets on a fucking 10 hour plane ride and goes over there he doesn't specify where it was but he says he lives in Chicago at one point so I don't know where he would go from Chicago that would only be 10 hours that would have an animation studio but honestly I'm overthinking it at that point and he goes to this place and then Shaq appears in real life and he's like oh my god it's Shaq and then he runs away and then the building collapses behind him and all of this you might think this is told in very exacting detail as well like the episodes of the show but no it's actually glossed over very quickly so we don't even really get the chance to understand what's going on or get into the moments and actually get the chance to be scared before it's over like he's putting all the detail in the wrong places and then all the areas we should have detail is just very bare bones it's really annoying on top of all that what kind of fucking person would go on a 10 hour plane ride just out of curiosity about a children's cartoon you know what I mean like sure there is a type of person who could do that but the thing is you would need to set up their character as being that type of person and as I said we don't really get anything like that from this you know if the character even had one or two throwaway lines where he mentioned I once went all the way to France because I was curious about an old collector's item that I was trying to find like okay I could believe that this guy one has the time and disposable income to do that and two he's the type of person that is focused enough to do that like it'd be an unusual person but sure I could get into that at least or and this is what most horror things do just put the character into a position where they have to look more into this and they're just stuck in the midst of all this supernatural danger craziness and if they don't do this then they'll die like a pretty common example of this is one of the character's loved ones is trapped somewhere and they have to go out and save them Resident Evil 7 and 8 both did this like the main character Ethan Winters hears that his girlfriend who has been missing for a long time is in this abandoned house in Louisiana so he goes off to find her and then he gets there and he himself winds up trapped as well so he has to not only get her out but get himself out safely and that works pretty well for a small focused horror story this doesn't do anything like that like everything bad that happens to this character is just because he keeps thinking wow I wonder what's going on with Happy Happy like at first it's just he found these weird DVDs watched them and they were kind of creepy and then he just keeps going like there's no reason for any of this he also takes a picture of Shack and posts it and I will admit this picture is pretty creepy because like you know it's you can't make out a lot of detail it's really blurry and dark there but it does genuinely look like okay that's almost human but not quite and given the circumstances it is believable how even if you got a picture of that person that thing whatever the hell it's supposed to be that it would look like that so yeah it does actually work kind of as a creepy little moment but then after he leaves he basically he just goes through a lot of various issues trying to find more stuff about Happy Happy like he discovers there was a movie which is in two parts and he actually has to work for a while to find both parts and then he describes it in exacting detail and then later he finds out oh no that wasn't the real movie this is the real movie part 72 like I was saying earlier and then he watches that and goes through it in exacting detail and then he finds out there was an old Happy Happy computer game and he goes through that in exacting detail all the while he occasionally runs into Shaq and then Shaq is like ooh I'm scary and the main character guy's like ah and there's honestly not that much else to this like I know it can sometimes make it seem like I'm not cutting something a fair shake when I gloss over a lot of the details because I don't like cliches but the devil is in the details you know whether it's good or bad often comes down to those small little moments and that's true but there's just not much to the little moments in this and if I were to read over all this I could do that but this whole video would be like four times longer so long story short Shaq was someone who worked on Happy Happy and apparently he went insane don't know why he went insane there's like hints that there's something supernatural going on here but it's not really confirmed if there's anything supernatural going on and we never learned much about it and not in like a ooh the mystery is scarier than whatever the author could come up with way like just this is done in a way where it's kind of confusing doesn't make sense and anyways the main character apparently just bought a house somewhere else while he still had his old house in Chicago so I don't know how much money this guy has but it's apparently a lot he's not just some average Joe and then Shaq appears and he shoots Shaq and then he stuffs his body in the fireplace and burns it up and then he leaves and he's like okay I'm done with Happy Happy no more of that and you'd think after going through all of that he would just say okay y'all don't make my mistake just run away from Happy Happy run away from any children's cartoons that are like this it's not worth it but no he doesn't do that he actually ends by saying well to be honest I will actually open up another blog which will be a short-lived one that talks about Fright House screamers remember that what do I regret when I quit posting on this blog well I regret that I could have made a longer post on Happy Happy and the Golden Apples finished form however since I just want to never see Happy Happy again I don't have any regrets I'm sorry for leaving this blog but I must part ways for now see you soon Gerasim Yakalev oh I was wrong we do get his name at some point but it's literally at the end there and then it's just a list of a couple of kids who were involved in Happy Happy that died so after all of that he's still gonna continue doing this and I don't know if he ever this author ever wrote Fright House screamers again but or if he ever went got around to writing it but I'm not gonna read it either way and that was Happy Happy you know it was terrible in just about every way you know it's not written particularly well it's not set up particularly well the story makes no sense the characters are stupid and weird and don't make sense the whole threat doesn't make sense the villain is laughably weak and incompetent like the only part where he seems like he could be maybe a bit of a threat is where the main character goes to that burned down studio and he sees him there like that's the one part of this whole thing that seems like oh okay maybe something's going on here but you know at least with the other crappy children's cartoon based creepypastas and they try to go like oh look it's a children's cartoon but there's blood and death and blablabla aren't you scared yet at least with those they have the decency to keep it relatively short like Squidward's suicide is terrible but it's short you know I can be done with that in like 10 minutes this took me a while to get through and I had a horrible time I don't think I have anything else to add other than if you're writing creepypastas and you want to make it more than one part long ask yourself is that really fucking necessary the answer is almost always going to be no a huge thanks to everyone who bothered to watch this far for whatever reason I don't know who would want to listen to me talk for half an hour but especially a huge thanks to all my patrons whose names are on here including the ten dollar and up patrons Oppo Savilainen, Olivia Rayan, brother Santotys Buffy Valentine, Carolina Clay, Christopher Quinten Dan and Ciliovic Echo, Joel, Karkat Kitsune, Liza Rudikova, Lord Tiebreaker Madison Lewis Bennett, Marilyn Roxy, Microphone Sad Martigan, Tobacco Crow, Tom Beanie and of course as always, Vei Victis y'all are the best really let me tell you that like if you were here I'd kiss you I wouldn't actually kiss you but you know you're you're all pretty cool anyways so just don't don't take my okay yeah goodbye