 I'm Adam Olinger. I just got done seeing Ninja Turtles. It's Sunday. I probably won't get this review up for a couple more days Just because I'm dying from some sort of a disease I have right now, and I don't feel like editing My children went with me my seven-year-old and my four-year-old they elected not to do this review because they have no Respect for myself for my show or really anything else in this world, and I and I respect them for that My expectations were actually pretty high for this Ninja Turtles flick The last one was very mediocre across the board for some reason Michael Bay and crew decided to make the Turtles 15 feet tall and Just like these hulking dudes, which I just find ridiculous. I know pretty much everybody thinks that's stupid I don't know why they did that like who on the the committee thought let's make these like Transformers in size because the kids will think that's awesome Nobody thinks that's awesome. So going into this sequel you already have like lessened expectations for that However, I was excited because we have bebop and rocks steady in the trailer. We got Krang Shredders back. He looks like he's more normal not a transformer as well And it looked like he was focused on the Turtles Most of that stuff is in the sequel and it works very well You get a more cartoon-oriented Turtles movie things that work the Turtles camaraderie their the brotherly love is there I think the Turtles are I have more personality this time Donatello. They even look a lot different I mean, I'm pulled up to my house right now. So those neighbors around outside with their children looking at me like What the hell's he doing? Don't worry about what I'm doing Gladys go back go back to your mediocre life They made the Turtles look different from each other Donatello thinner. He's kind of frail looking actually he's super nerdy Of course Michelangelo is really funny. I'll be it a bit too stupid this time around. He's borderline a six-year-old Instead of just being this party dude. He's he's kind of an idiot However, I still got a lot of laughs from him Leonardo, of course leads Raphael Raphael holy crap. I actually liked him for once usually I'm anti Raphael I don't get his his bullshit that he does. He's always like off on his own and gruff and just pissy But this time it made sense you know he was he was mad at Leo because Leo was hiding things from him and You know Ralph Ralph thought they were part of a family. Well, I mean they are a family But he thought that that family meant something to Leo their weapons. Why are they ninjas? Why are they ninjas? That's that's it goes back to why they're gigantic it makes no sense them being large and being ninjas does not co-exist if you're this giant Monster of a thing you can just pick up six guys at once and throw them which they can So why why learn how to do martial arts? It made no sense to begin with and to that Extent they don't use their weapons at all I don't think the turtles at any point in this film fight a foot clan member Which is more puzzling that they even put the foot clan in here at all It was cool to see ninjas, but if you're not gonna fight said ninjas. What's the point? There is a cool opening sequence where they're in vehicles and I guess Raphael takes out three of them there He doesn't use his weapons. He just kind of jumps at them And that was neat that was that was a fun sequence and I wanted more of that in the middle There's this fantastic plane sequence that leads to a little tank battle. They're going down the river It's on the trailers. It's very cool a Little nitpick in the trailer Raphael is gonna jump out the plane and he pumps himself up and he goes yes Yes, yes, yes, yes, and he jumps out. I was waiting for that and they changed it in the movie I hate when they change shit in the movie from the trailer God Still a great scene, but come on. Don't put the good version in the trailer then leave it out of the movie That's annoying or when you're watching it. You're looking for a couple things one You're looking for a lot of turtles doing fun stupid things Two you're looking for them to kick all sorts of ass The first thing was there the second thing. No, not at all crying Awesome seeing him there and his voice was pretty great too. It was just just as stupid as it was in the show I liked all this stuff with him Casey Jones is nothing like his initial iteration. He's not some rebel dude from the streets. He's a cop now He makes no sense. He's very lame in the film I know the guy's aero. I never watched the show, but okay, maybe that's cool for you Megan Fox as April O'Neill What what do you say? She's eye candy. She knows she's eye candy. Everybody knows she is That's not what we want from April. I mean granted April always has been Pretty pretty hot in my mind that she was more than that and in here It's like the the writer slash director went out of their way to find ways for her to be in ridiculous outfits Almost forgot the best part of the movie, which is bebop and rock steady. These guys make it work Well, he's got the purple shades and the mohawk. He's got some they got great lines Super comic relief just like in the cartoon series and shredder is super serious Just like he was also in the cartoon. I mean shredder was kind of an idiot in the cartoon, but Nevertheless, he was the straight man of the group and then there's all these like crazy Idiots surrounding him like Baxter Stockman and then bebop and rocksteady. So that worked really well shredder super underutilized Really disappointed with how they handled him once again setting up sequel stuff But bebop and rocksteady, uh, they stole the show for sure every scene they're in and they're in a good amount So it's not all bad. Uh, it does more right than it does wrong. I just would have liked more action. That's all Score wise, it's tough zero through 10 in a movie like this. This isn't a masterpiece of cinema You know, so how do you scale something like that? And that's the problem I think video game reviews have too How do you review a game like journey which got 10s and a's across the board? But it's like a two hour experience, but it's a fantastic experience compared to the witcher, which is like 100 hours You know, how do you how do you do that? I think it's just the mindset that you go in with So ranking a movie like this you have to look at it from the light of it's for kids. It's a family movie How does it stack up with things like zootopia and stuff like this? I mean, maybe not even that's maybe an unfair comparison because zootopia is smartly written and uh, you know It makes sense and has a lot of creativity where this ninja turtles film is It's exactly what you expect it to be Uh, so i'm gonna give it out of 10 10 being the best or being the worst we're gonna go 6.5 we'll say this is from a turtle's fan Who thinks that these giant turtles look stupid? I don't mind how they physically look like the faces and stuff that they're more closely aligned with real turtles That's fine. But just shrink them down Shrink them down somehow And then you have a better movie because you can have them fight ninjas You know, you can have them fight characters and not just jump on people and crush people Ah, I just I can't get over how stupid that concept is Anyway, yeah 6.5 out of 10 If you like the last movie, I think you're gonna like this one more. It does more right than wrong If you like the old movies a lot still, you know, I look at those old movies like all right When I was a kid, I enjoyed them. They're pretty stupid now. The first one's by far the best Um, but if you're holding on to those or the comic book, you're not gonna like this. This is Something different for sure But you already knew that if you saw the last one Anyway, that's it. Um, let me know in the comments what you thought about it and uh until then I'll see you next time in the car