 All right, so here we are so up guys drew here that anxiety guy calm and look who's with me over on that side It's been a long time since we did one of these Yeah, yeah, it's been anything in 2018. So we just squeeze him on and right just squeeze one in right I I just uploaded all of our clear weeks videos to Facebook because people wanted to do like the watch party thing So I had to go through the dates and I'm like, oh, jeez. It's a long time a year. Yeah Yeah, I went through a whole pregnancy and yeah Right As I was looking at some of the first ones you were pregnant like misty didn't even exist yet technically like she was there But not there and now she's like running around making noise and Being awesome. Yeah All right, so today we're going to chat for a little while and we're going to talk about Taking a leap of faith and I think I think it's a big topic. Everything is a big topic. I say it all the time But this is the really big the real big topic. This is the one if you listen to any video listen to this one and I think I think taking leap of faith sometimes all the technical stuff that we talk about and the clear weeks things and the exposures and the acceptance of the theories and the cognitive theory and all that stuff In the end it comes down to taking a leap of faith. If you don't take a leap of faith, you're never I mean, yeah, what's your experience taking a leap of faith? I know you did it because you're Mine was actually quite tangible because I because I took I took phallium I took diazepam like as and when needed So it was like every time I was anxious I would you know take this diazepam and then I suddenly made that like realization that that was avoided You know And and then I was ah So, yeah, I just like Stopped you know what I actually did was so I would go I'm gonna wait 10 minutes and then I'll take a tablet You know so I'll allow myself to feel it for 10 minutes and then I'll take a tablet and then after a week It was like and after 20 minutes. I'll take one. And so yeah, so I gradually like weaned So I couldn't do it like as immediately as I would maybe want to because had to be careful to To come off gradually But it was for me like actually like a very tangible I'm just going to stop taking these tablets, you know because that was my biggest form of avoidance And so once I came off them I was like almost all the way there because I'd completely stopped that massive avoidance. You see So it wasn't it was like very like tangible like if I stop taking these then I'm Then I'm not avoiding so I'll just take So you might have to get to that point of like deciding to do that Yeah, but and so maybe you were you were out and because we've talked about this in the past like you were out You were living you were doing your things You were just doing it Long way around like in a crappy crappy like panicky anxiety and using the medication to to get you through it Yeah, yeah, yeah Long time because I so I started when I was very young when I was 11 You know it was my worst times and so all through my I just decided that I was just not going to let I thought it was something I had to live with forever I didn't think I had a choice and I didn't think there was any way out of it. So I was just like well Okay, I've just got anxiety. So I'll just keep like doing the stuff that I'm doing I just I was missing the information that we keep trying to give people I think given this information sooner, I would have saved myself 20 years of Which is so common like I'm always amazed when you know, we throw that out to get off a little tangent We throw this stuff out here and so many people that like show up like in the discussion forum or something Which if you're not in it join it And I'll put a link in the group in the video somewhere and uh, I think I'm always amazed that people were like Oh, I never heard of this before. I didn't know this was a thing. I didn't Well, I remember finding the big panic disorder group that we used to both, you know Eventually when I first found that I remember saying like guys I found like this new thing where you like face and accept the anxiety and I remember someone go Oh, that's not a new thing and you stepped in and went like well, it might not be anything But to holy this is a new thing and it's in a massive step. So like yeah, I said that yeah And I was like, yes, thank you Yeah, a lot of people don't understand it But so I think it's cool. So you were out. It's a little different because I mean, you know A lot of people that are watching us are either stuck at home or they're not out out living their stuff They there's so many things that they feel like they can't do what they're not doing and so in the end like you could understand We we talk incessantly. We record videos people watch us. They watch me. They watch me and billy. They watch billy They watch they read they follow coaches. They do eight zillion different things But in the end so for you there the first leap of faith in your story was The very first time you decided instead of popping this you were taking diazepam, right instead of taking that Like instead of doing it. I'm gonna wait 10 minutes the very first time you ever did that That was really like technically your leap of faith. I would think Yeah, like hey, let's see what happens here, you know, which because I think it's so important And I mean not that we need to talk specifically about your experience But I'm guessing that when you did that like in your head, it's you're leaping into the unknown like I know that I'm gonna feel terrible. I'm terrified. I need to get rid of these feelings Okay, what happens if I don't take this pill? Like yeah, it's a big black murky like horrible You know, what am I going into the biggest ones for me because I always knew I had that like or in 10 minutes I'll take it and like that that was amazing. Actually, that was a really good way of cutting down But the big one for me would be when I started leaving the house without tablets, you know, okay, so that might have been Yeah Yeah, yeah, I'm at home So in the end what it comes down to is that very first right the first leap of faith So you understand like I have to accept I have to we talk about surrender now instead of acceptance I have to surrender. I have to accept. I have to float. I have to You know change my focus ignore the thoughts all the things that we talk about over and over and over and over But in the end, I think people people will do that that thing where they say Well, I get it all. I just not ready Like and I've heard that a lot last two weeks This week and I've got like this thing coming up and there's always like There's always a reason right exactly. I have this event. I've had it's the holidays You know, there's some reason not to do it or they'll just fly out saying that people be honest And they're just like, well, I get all it. I'm slowly coming around to the idea But I'm just not there yet. They'll say like I'm just not there yet And then in three weeks, they're still not there and in four months They're still not there and the question is still like, but how do you do this? It's so hard But how am I supposed to do that? It's so hard. It's so scary and the answer is always the same Yeah, it's really hard and yeah, it's really scary and you do it anyway And that's the leap of faith, right? So The first time you decide to just surrender and say I have this horrible these horrible feelings and these like horrible scary thoughts are happening and my body is freaking out and Like I I'm afraid that something's going to happen pass out vomit die Whatever it is you think it is Like I just I'll just let that happen. That is a leap of faith. Like it is Yeah, like you're being tremendously courageous. You have to be and you are You are jumping off the cliff into what you think is certain doom Yeah And I remember your experience of this. I reckon I do I do So and I've had several of those so the very first time it happened You know when I first started having panic attacks many many years ago And I think I told the story a couple of times. I remember sitting in the car in our driveway My mother's car actually at the time And it started to come and I just read the Claire Weeks book which I devoured And I'm like, okay, I know what I have to do And I remember just like leaning back in the seat and closing my eyes and like, okay, here it goes And that was a huge leap of faith. That was like I'm pretty sure I get this. I understood the theory I had it all logically like but now I had to actually do it and I'm like, well, here we go And that was a leap. I like I literally had to jump off the cliff and say well I I guess we're going to see what happens here. And then I then when things got bad for me Again, I've had to do that several times several times. Were you just like I just I guess I'm just trying to acknowledge how for for many people. That's exactly what this is You're literally closing your eyes and jumping off a cliff and hoping that there's a net there Like yeah But but there is a net there and like, you know how you know there's a net there You're looking you're looking at a net right here on my on my left or right or whichever side of the video Holly is a net is proof that the net is there. I am proof that the net is there. We know How many people we were just talking about engvild in the group right She's proof that the net is there. So Engvild ronald Right ronald danney in australia Jackie. Yeah Anita in greece. She's like off to the races. We're watching andrew build his net in las vegas Like the net is there. So we talked about this a little the other day like, uh How do you when you take the leap of faith? You're not the first one to ever take it So you're not truly jumping into the unknown, right? Yeah, yeah, I think that's like what our You know job in a way is is to sort of try and Try and tell people like not only like the information that they're possibly missing like I was for so long So we give that information but then also it's just we can't You know, there's no sort of necessarily like tips and tricks of how to do it It's just like you've got to do it. But all I can promise you is that like Nothing bad will happen and like we've all like been there and done it and it's it's fine Like you will be absolutely fine and you will get better Yeah, that is the outcome of it, you know And so in the end like that thing where it's like, well, I think I just can't I don't know how you guys did it Like I just I just can't I just can't make myself do it Last night there was a lot of discussion in the group about that. How do I um, somebody had asked How do I let go of the fear and and it's funny because the same question gets asked over and over with different things Last night was how do we let go of the fear of losing control? But I've also heard people say how do we let go of the fear of dying? How do we let go of the fear that I'm having a stroke? How do we let go of the fear of fainting? How it's all the same thing is they're all the same answer Yeah, yeah, right. It's not the exact thing. It's it's the fear in general so So we give the same answer over and over and in the end it's like well if you think you're going to lose control Then just go ahead Like yeah, that's what you're really doing. You just go ahead. Take a leap of faith. Go ahead and lose control Go ahead go insane. I dare you Yeah, I mean it's exactly the same as someone sitting on an aeroplane that's scared of flying And like grip in hold of the seats in the hope that that's holding the plane up in the sky And it's just like you could so you could sit there that whole flight and grip onto the seats And you and when you land and it's everything's okay. You're like I made it I got through or you could have sat on that same aeroplane and just like chilled and watched some tv and Listened to a podcast and just had a nice time and You still would have made it right you still would have made it You didn't do anything So I think like Yeah, that's very true We talked about I was actually watching one of the old videos and we went through a whole sequence about that Like no matter what you do you're going to get through it. So Or or you're going to be afraid I think what we specifically talked about is no matter what happens when you like have that anxiety spike or you have a panic attack You're going to be afraid like there's just deal with that. That's the way that's going to be So you could either be afraid the way you've always been afraid gripping to hold the airplane in the air Or you can be afraid constructively and learn to be a little less afraid the next time So which which one is it and that's that leap of faith That's that leap of faith like but if I don't grip the seat and I don't take my pills and I don't Run home or run to the car if I don't whatever it is that you think you're doing to save yourself If I don't do this something bad is going to happen. You have to take a leap of faith Yeah Into the unknown Look at how look at what you've done every single time and has it made you feel good? Like has it made things right like it hasn't made it better. Yeah And and that is what is prolonging it and and making it in endure as well And so you have to do something different And and that different is that there's a first time there's always a first time And I think we're seeing those stories. So like again, I'm going to say again join the facebook group It's there's so much discussion happening that illustrates exactly what we're talking about now You know, if you're not in it, even if don't post it's okay. You don't have to just read Like every single day now we have people who come in and tell that story of the leap of leap of faith Like I started having anxious thoughts and I started feeling panic and I said a lot of times it's just up effort I'm going to do it like they hit that point where they've seen it enough. They've read it enough They're just tired of it. It's like, all right screw it I'm just going to let it go like like I read all my friends do And they do it and then they will invariably run in and like pound on the keyboard all happy Which is awesome. Like I did it. I did it like I let it come and I told it to kill me and like it was over in three minutes and I feel great and So it's that leap but I know how terrifying it is But you got to leap off the cliff and the other thing is When are you ever ready? When are you ever ready, right? You're never ready to do it. You're never ready Like we we were talking about that with the kids thing like you always think you have to be ready to have a family Yeah, yeah, yeah, my dad said to me you will never be ready to have kids to just have them and then figure it out Because I would never be ready. I'm definitely not ready now and I've already got a two-year-old You said you're not ready I'm still not ready like it's you know Whatever I'm 52. I'm sure my mother would say she's not ready. So Yeah, you know, that's the way that goes So at the same thing holds true and I've any I guess parents are probably like chuckle when we hear us saying these things, but At the same thing holds true Like you you are never going to get to the point and I think people make this mistake Like I'm just going to keep reading and like asking questions the same question again and again again I'm trying to find like I'll read a different book. I'll try a different framework Something must I need to find that thing that resonates with me and I know I'm shitting on it a little bit but like Trying to find that thing that things gonna gonna one morning they're gonna wake up and say now I'm ready You will never wake up that day because you are maybe they're looking for something that means they don't Have to do that themselves that something else can do it for them And I think it's a lot of it is that like I need I'm looking for some trick that will like somehow make me ready to do this Incredibly difficult scary thing and there's no trick and you're never going to wake up on morning and say okay now I'm ready I'm ready to go like you're never going to be you're not going to be ready So just do it anyway and right out later like just deal with the consequences which are good Yes, so you have to when you think you're not ready. I'm not there yet. I haven't quite put my brain around it yet I still don't understand it. You don't have to understand it. Just You you understand it. Here's the crazy thing about it. You understand it better after you do it Yeah Yeah, I remember do I remember being there and doing it and still like so it doesn't necessarily all like Oh and everything's falling into place and I now understand everything but it was like a gradual like Oh my god. Yes. So every time I was doing this I'm actually like still making it worse and like that was me trying to avoid it and and like it was like You have to like unlearn everything you've been doing this whole time And it doesn't take a long time, you know But when you'd make that first little step and you're like no, I'm gonna just turn around and look at this fear like look at this anxiety I always say it's a bit like You know if you have a nightmare and there's like something like chasing you and you're like running constantly like if you actually Stopped and turn around and tried to look at this thing because you're like How could I possibly be more scared than I am like running away from this like big monster in this nightmare? If you actually stopped and turned to face that you'd be like, I'd surely just die. I would just die But like you wouldn't you just look and you'd be like, oh, yeah, there's nothing Yeah, I'm just dreaming right you would just use it It can't get any bigger than it is because The fear that you're feeling in that panic attack is the is like fear distilled It is like just chemical fear that you're feeling right can't get worse than that, right? No, and I say that a lot like when you when you take that that leap of faith means Come and do the worst thing that you know how to do to me, right? Like kill me or make me go crazy whatever But it's already doing the worst thing it knows how to do Like adrenaline doesn't have any more tricks up its sleeves So if you grip and you're you know, and you're bracing and you're running and you're hiding and you I can only go to the supermarket if I have my husband with me like he's doing nothing That there was a discussion about that too like you're safe people your safety behaviors your avoidance behaviors They're doing nothing because the adrenaline is already doing everything. It knows how to do it doesn't know any more tricks It doesn't know how to kill you or make you crazy or make you vomit or well I mean whatever, but it doesn't know how to do all of those things. You can address that a little bit, but So sure so that leap of faith is like under understanding like this is as good I'm never going to be ready So I got to leap now and then learn after because you can't learn until you do the experience that first experience and I I see people all the time now they get the aha moment like oh, I did it But the aha moment only comes after they did it the first time Yeah, yeah, if it's a tiny little thing it doesn't have to be a giant like oh guys I went from my sofa to climbing the Matterhorn like that's not that's not it It's usually a tiny little and you don't even realize the significance, but suddenly like just the mind shift It changes the mindset changes like oh, yeah, that actually that worked I remember driving and I was driving to the airport to like pick up my dad or something I remember driving and I was really feeling anxious like like and I was like what is this on a You know one to ten scale find that scale quite useful Yeah, this is a seven and I was like, okay, so instead of being like, oh my god, this is a seven I was just like let's go on. Let's notch it up to an eight, you know, like just it was like an experiment You know, I'd never ever done that before and it was like because I've been sort of reading this sort of stuff And I was just like let's notch it up to an eight and like if you like it's impossible You cannot like you cannot will it to get higher and I remember like doing that and being like Oh my god, that's massive. That was like, yeah, like oh You can't tell it to cut, you know, like it doesn't work like that it only Reacts to your fear like right or you're like, oh no, no than the more Right the more it's there. Yeah, the more it's there. Well, you're like, oh, okay. What can you do then? It's like, oh, no, I can't do anything. I just make you think what I could do to you Right, right exactly like don't invite me in or if you invite me in I'm Right exactly you must try and lock the door then I'm really scary because I pound on the door But if you open the door and say come on in and oh no, what do I do? I'm out of ideas don't invite me in. Yeah, exactly. So that's so true I think but then that aha moment Like you did it you turned around and looked at the monster and said, you know, come on Come on do it and like realize like oh, it's and then you have that aha moment of like Oh, you might still be terrified like the next time or you still might be avoiding You still might have to struggle to get at the door or whatever it is you're dealing with That's what you think you forget that you spoke because you get so swept up in the panic And I always feel like, you know, like you're sort of like falling from the top of the building And you've got to try and remember before you hit the floor what to do, but you're never going to hit the floor anyway Right, exactly Like, you know, like that's true But in the end you got to you got to make that fall over and over and over And the first time that you say, okay, I'll just fall and hope that there's a net and you discover there's a net It's like oh my god. There's actually a net and you're so happy, but honestly the very next day You'll probably forget that there's a net there. Yeah, that's that's normal. It's normal It's not like you have the light bulb with the aha moment and then suddenly everything is better like it's not but But it's it'll be just a little easier the second time You'll remember the net a little bit sooner and then a little bit sooner and then a little bit sooner and It's a repetitive learning thing So but in the end I think that the thing to take out of this discussion is That's that you're never number one. You're never going to be ready number two It's it is just a function of courage and taking a leap into what you think is the unknown But the third thing is it is it's actually not the unknown Like you are surrounded by people who have taken that leap already. This is not the unknown Like we know I flat out. No, I will bet you every dollar I have I know Like because I've been there you've been there so many people around us have been there This is not a leap into the unknown follow those who came before you so instead of like sometimes You think like whatever you're thinking like that was the biggest lesson for me I think was just to have to like completely Like just disregard my own Inner core belief about everything basically Because I didn't know I did I was just getting it wrong repeatedly, you know And like and you know and you get that sort of like gut feeling of just like something really bad's gonna happen And all those anxious thoughts and you're like, no, but I know deep deep down you don't you don't know anything just Just as also as an experiment just try and forget Like just ignore yourself and just listen to someone else. You know, I mean it was like a really big deal for me to like Do you know, I mean it was like so like Yeah, like don't be so arrogant Holly is to think that you actually Know anything about anything like just forget everything you think you know And just listen to someone else for a change and then just do what they're doing and just follow them blindly That's not in my nature to do that at all But I did it and I was like, all right They were completely right and I was completely wrong, you know And I had to change everything I thought was true and yeah, I didn't know anything I think we see that because you know people might logically have that understanding like yeah, you're right I gotta Reiterate the same things again and again and again. I'm not picking on anybody But so if you're watching us think about that is that you like are you doing this? Are you doing do you enter into every say discussion? You know online every thread every every thought is always just a reiteration of the same thing Yeah, but my legs feel so wobbly if you have said my legs shake Like over and over and over and over you're hanging on To that thing that like like you like Holly was just saying like you think you know, but you don't know Like or you know, I yeah, I know I I hate this. This is horrible like but we're all we're all strong We're gonna get through it this too. Okay ready. Here's here's leap of faith Don't ever say ever again. This too shall pass Do not post a meme do not like use those stupid platitudes Do not use cliches this shall pass unless you fucking make it pass So you gotta make the leap Like sorry like at some point in every video I'm gonna have to have that moment or I just did what I just did But stop that like stop saying you don't know until you make the leap So you have to stop repeating the same things again and again and again and again just say like I'm just gonna jump and then every your Suddenly your your perspective will be different once you jump Think like with anxiety. It's it's especially like it's so sort of isolating And you know, everyone we all say like oh, but no one else understands You don't understand what I'm going through and I think you kind of feel like If I haven't got myself and I can't trust myself then who on earth can I trust but like You're the one person you absolutely should not trust and and I guess that feels kind of weird and wrong to let go of yourself Almost and be like you are not helping yourself and you need to get rid of yourself almost, you know It's a man because you are not helping And then just like just listen to what someone else is saying what someone's written in a book, you know Weeks and just do that. Just forget yourself. Let yourself go because yourself is holding you It's like one of those like you Let's have a weekend of freedom. It's a yeah $10,000 each come and see me and holly for a weekend. Um I think you should totally this show you have to start not trusting yourself. That's true. You are a reliable person, you know Right and that's that whole plays into like you can't argue with an anxious mind thing Like you can't talk yourself out of it You can't reason with it when you're panicking like there's no there's no rationality In what drives it like by by definition. It's all irrational So you cannot rationally fix this like you have to do what seems like a crazy irrational thing to do and like Go into it jump off the cliff like everything opposite of what you think you're supposed to do So Sooner or later, you're never going to be ready If there's courage and a leap of faith, but you're not leaping into the unknown Like millions of millions of people have done this before Just to address A little to expand a little bit on that thing that just says you have to let go of yourself or get over yourself or Leave yourself behind like trust the other people And I know that I might get a little bit of pushback on this But this is not on a technical level Like if you are trapped on your sofa or you cannot drive to the airport pick up your dad because you're afraid of doing that Like this is not a spiritual thing. This is not an emotional thing. This is not a spiritual thing This is not a personal growth and development thing. This is a mechanical thing So you don't have to abandon yourself like change who you are or like abandon What's the word i'm looking for Like it's not it's i'm not saying like don't be you to you be you, you know, i'm not going against that But what we're relying on here is the mechanics of Six billion people that are all made the same on the planet and all the billions of people that have lived and died before It's that are all made the same and work the same way like our brains work the same way So it's not it's not abandoning your personality or your spirit or anything like that. It's It's just accepting that like we're all made the same way So what worked for engvild in norway and holly in mayorka and true in new york Will work for you too Yeah When it comes to this stuff the mechanical stuff the nuts and bolts of like getting off the sofa and back out and living your life Then there are other issues you can also be dealing with that's fine That are bigger issues emotional mental personality personal growth spiritual But but this isn't that like take that out And and the other thing i'll just ramble for another couple of minutes while you just blindly watch me I guess it's so awkward but And like diving because you bring up things that I want to like expound on a little bit Like so you get a good analogy about the dream like running away from the monster in the dream And that's good. So listen to holly say that because it's a good framework It's a good analogy But then you have to put that down Like put down the analogy the monster into the bed or the dream Or that all of those things where it's a we're giving a framework to think about you have to stop Thinking about the framework and do it then do it So You know what i'm saying like I see a lot of people will Will take what you say and then they'll They'll want to talk about that a lot the monster the this that the other and then that becomes their new Right it's another it's another framework to get around it's another thing to start except In three four weeks later. They're still trying to like figure out a framework So take the lesson and do it Do it and then find your own framework. Yes. Yeah, that's fine do it and then come back Works to the party come to the front right party. Yeah, it's all good. But but first do it. So it's not a thinking thing It's a doing thing Yeah, yeah, yeah So sometimes I think I see that too a reaction to even a lot of the stuff I say like I'll I'll put stuff out there and You you've done it. You posted a couple of really good videos like the one of you in the car The other day was just just outstanding like so helpful But then then I see people take it and then they just becomes a big long discussion about like Yeah, Holly's right. Holly, you know did this or or yeah, that was brilliant when you said this and then they just start Harping on that. Yes, it's that but I can't remember it when I'm scared But but this but like, you know, okay, take it file it do it and then come back and talk about it after you did it Yeah, so maybe like I think maybe a good thing to do as well is Maybe this is might sound like I'm going against what you're saying But it isn't it's to have that plan in place for when you're going to panic, you know Instead I think I see lots of people They panic and they're like, oh, I'm forgetting what to do and I'm out of this really bad day because I had this terrible Panic attack and then everyone like gives them all this helpful advice and then it's just like Oh, no, no, no, I'm fine. And then the next day. It's like, oh, I'm having this terrible big panic attack It's just like no no no listen like maybe write down a plan like just make a plan because I'll go into panic and you need to expect it and I think like maybe if you're like ready for it You'll feel more able to to do that stuff. Do you know what I mean to be like? Okay, I'm probably gonna have a panic attack at some point today and when it comes I'm so ready for it And I'm gonna like and I'm gonna do this and I do that like maybe that might help instead of just being like Oh my god a panic attack. I wasn't expecting that. I don't know what to do. Do you know? No, I agree with you 100 on that. That's actually a good thing to do So we do talk about that like you when you panic the time for planning is over Like yeah, you are in an irrational unreasonable state So you cannot that can't be the first time in two weeks that you've you've thought about it Or like try to come up with a plan. So when you're feeling okay, and you're rational, that's the time Write things down have a plan. It but it's an action plan Like it's a plan of this is what I'm when you're alive, but when you panic that is your time to implement it That's when you panic and you don't implement. It's just another waste is opportunity Exactly, exactly. And I think I did a video a while back that's entitled positive self-talk is bullshit And like the and I don't and I've had to explain that one a lot I've gotten a lot of flack on that one Like the positive self-talk is part of your action plan when you feel good So like you can drill all that stuff when you're feeling good So that when the shit hits the fan and it will and that all goes at the window You're not in that like i'm okay. I'm okay. I got this. I got this because you will never believe that you're okay too late It's over. That's out Yeah, it's never gonna happen. So and it goes against the whole sort of principle of like Except the fear, you know, like take the leap Take it right. I'm let's go for it. I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm okay. I got this. I got this I'm trying to calm myself down. It's not leaping It is in a way. It is so Take a leap of faith and understand that like you have to do it It's freaking scary. You don't want to do it Do it anyway and like come back and see us afterwards Yeah, I don't I don't know anything you're doing feels like you're like trying not to look at like i'm okay I'm okay. I'm okay. Like instead of like looking at it square in the face if you go No, i'm okay. I'm okay. I'm okay like it's it's like it is an avoidance because it's like a sort of No, no, no, i'm okay. You're okay. You're okay instead of like looking square going like yeah, i'm not okay But this is fine Right. I'm not that's right. I'm not okay. But this is fine. And I guess we have to mention we have to like patience I think we did already like you have to do it again again and again and again There's no light bulb moment that says okay. I leaped so now I should be better Step four let time pass that time pass. That's exactly right If you bring it back to the clear week stuff let time pass and that's a the leap has to happen again and again and again Unfortunately, but like I said earlier, it will be it's easier The hardest bit is like right at the beginning it gets so much easier So that video I made in the car this is over and I was feeling anxious so easy for me because it's such a well-practiced Right, right like there's no there's no magic in it the leap Okay, you take you take still take the leap technically every day Like every time you start to feel anxious you still you take the leap You know every time I look through the wrong part of my glasses and I get dizzy for a second You were saying Chris, I do like it happens every day. It isn't just stupid Like every time I look through the wrong part of the glasses and I feel slightly visually disoriented I take the leap again like just for a second But I take the leap again But I've taken the leap so many thousands of times that now it's not even a it doesn't feel like a leap I forget I'm leaping, but I'm leaping. Yeah. Yeah, yeah And it just boom just happens automatically think about it and like you can get there too So the first leap is the hardest the second one a little bit tinier bit easier Hardest Yeah, he's gonna write us a song that'll be a theme song But uh, yeah, the first leap is the hardest But that's what he comes down to take the leap of faith and understand that you're not leaping into the unknown We've all leaped before you Yeah, we've beaten this horse to death I think so May have so I guess like as always They make the plan to leap Then realize that you've missed your like Right Just be like wasn't ready when you think you're not ready leap anyway, and then you look back and say, oh, I'm really glad I did that I'm really glad I did that and it will be a terrifying experience, but then the the terror of the leap I what's the best way to describe this you jump off the building and you're falling and you Don't know there's a net and then all of a sudden There's a net like that feeling And if you're watching this video and you've you've hit the net you found the net Like please like post the comment and describe that feeling of like holy shit. There's a net. I'm okay. This is amazing Like yeah, yeah, because that fear will instantly turn in a there's a moment There's a moment at least I think there was for me. There was a moment The idea is rising to the point where plateaus and then it starts to go down ever ever so little And you recognize and it's like there's the net. That's the net. I hit the net Like there is a net. I couldn't see it, but it was there and there's such it's such a feeling of like I don't know what like Not accomplishment. I don't know what it is. It might be relief. It might be it's Joy, I mean, I don't know you look like you're struggling to like relate to that to a certain extent I don't know. I was just trying to think of when my my moment. Yeah, I was trying to think of my The first time that first time that you hit the net. It's like it's a huge thing So it's not the leap of faith isn't just continuous terror for the rest of your life. It's not Yeah, yeah, so anyway, all right. We gotta do more of these Yeah, it's always so fun I I ramble like endlessly and and swear and you just Smile while I do it. It's all good It's all good I really like big swearing bits in the middle. Just like, you know what fuck all this stuff That's right like that stuff's gonna come out and everyone's gotta be at least one episode like that in every every video So um, all right guys I'm gonna hit the stop recording button and then we'll sit awkwardly for a second while that happens Like that's what we do and we'll see you in the next one comments and questions Questions join the group