 times I have to go out by myself and be alone and I find myself in the woods a lot and I get that good feeling and when I'm in in the woods It's like I know everything and I can feel the ground I feel Feel the bush And it's it's great. I Think that's one reason why I survived in Nam is that being An American Indian being close to nature It's like I could ask the ground when I was on patrols or something Take care of me. I asked the tree show me where's my enemy. I asked the animals watch over me be my guide And a lot of times it worked They warned me why the enemy was around And at night I'd asked the crickets and a little little four-legged creatures and a winged creature insects brothers Be my eyes for me tonight And it worked so a lot of my Indian is period when I was in And most of my relatives have fought in wars most of my uncles have fought in them From the Civil War to the Cherokee Wars There always been warriors in my family. I have a He's the second cousin to my mother's or it makes me a third cousin in World War two His name is Jack Montgomery. He won the Medal of Honor in Italy. I believe that's what was either Italy or Germany He is awarded the Medal of Honor and I always looked at that picture of him in Roosevelt Now that's a pretty you know, that's a really great honor the Medal of Honor I thought that was really something the strong sense of duty and honor of the American Indian soldier is Dramatically demonstrated by the high proportion of service by volunteers Nearly 20% of the Indian population are veterans of the 81,000 Vietnam era Indian veterans 42,000 served in Vietnam The motivation to serve has its roots in generations of family and tribal traditions What motivates them what special experience from their heritage go with them into battle is there a magic that protects them? This program will look at the American Indian veteran what he is and isn't It will also explore resources available to all VA clinicians and counselors who were involved in treatment programs with American Indian veterans As combat veterans they suffer many of the same problems as their non Indian counterparts The difference is in the avenues of support available to the Indian veterans Support that rises out of a culture and a heritage as a warrior members of my family on the Taylor side on my dad's side were a warrior a warrior farmer group the the T was renowned for their fighting ability in the southwest of the Pueblo groups and we were historically some of the first groups to lead the Pueblo rebellion along with the the man who was whip Ope So it's kind of a family type of thing and as a as a baby My grandfather my great-grandfather Had blessed me as one of during the second war when I was born that He came up and I was just a baby yet and he picked me up and Bless me as the old men would do That my life was to be a warrior and he did this by saying prayers and then putting a feather and then Taking what they call his spit and rubbing it on the same this man Is going to be when he grows up will be the warrior in our family So my mom was very upset with that that I was chosen out of my brothers and sisters to become aware I'm a street street Indian and I grew up in An atmosphere where there were gangs when I was younger. I was in gangs and I had encountered death I was a survivor. That's where I grew up. I grew up among many cultures the black culture the Spanish culture Mexican culture Anglo culture and the urban Indian culture street Indian culture. I'm mixed with the traditional India. So I was a Gifted in a number of ways as far as survival in back back in my time when I was a young boy When I went into the service in World War two my grandpa Put a big celebration on for me and he had a big giveaway He told the people that I was going off to war and at that time. He also gave me an Indian name He gave me the name of standing bear Then he also made a song for me That they sang at that celebration and when I come back Well, they had another celebration for me in a big feast and that the people were happy That I came back in one one piece It's automatically assumed. I think in many cases that that Indian people, you know, if they enter the military service and they have throughout the years in great numbers that this implies a loyalty or a meaning or a loyalty to the United States government and Into the United States. I think that in many cases what Indians go into the military service for That well they give military service a different kind of meaning You'll see older Older Indian people say standing in front of the flag what they're not they're not necessarily going into a Kind of allegiance to the United States flag or something, but they're drawing power from it I think that over the years what what has happened is that is that Indian people have Through various tribes have built up a sort of tradition of going into the military service In World War one I've talked to World War one Indian veterans And they saw going into the military as as a kind of a fulfillment of treaty obligations Where you were allied with the United States? And that therefore if you go to war against Germany you Or something like that you were you were fulfilling that treaty obligation also, there's a there's a fact they they'll say often enough that that That we go into military service to protect our country and that isn't actually a reference to the United States as It's a reference to Sioux land or Navajo land or or Cherokee land or whatever My father was you've got to serve your country. You might as well do it now Why wait till later? Because I hate to be you don't want to be drafted There's never been a draftee in my family And I think it's had to be a slur to the family if it was a draftee. No, there are no draftees in my family members of my family had served in some capacity or another during either the Second World War the First World War second and the Korean conflict Korean war rather not so much a conflict but a war and my brother-in-law who was a paratrooper with the 187th Regimental Combat Team used to talk about different things and a lot of the people on the reservation were veterans and Also, you know talking about different things were happening particularly militarily that that I would sooner as I got older That was part of my obligation to to enter the service Sometimes there's a stereotypic view of how Indians view war I think it's important to realize we're talking about three to four hundred different tribes and cultures But if you had to get into some kind of shorthand you'd say there's two main ways of looking at it one as war as a Way of demonstrating one's courage one's manhood one's attainment of a position of honor another way looks upon war as a total aberration In the law of the universe a complete breakdown of order and as such a thing to be avoided at all costs It's interesting that even with those two Totally divergent views there couldn't be two views that are more different about war Both of the cultures that Subscribe to those views still come to the same conclusion and that is You have to prepare the individual to go out into it And then you have to bring them back in a very special sort of way You don't ask in either of those cultures that the war you forget what they have been through Nobody does that nobody tries to do that You acknowledge what they have been through And you recognize what they've been through and you recognize the individual the warrior has to begin today As he comes home is to begin to purify himself and that's going to take maybe A year or two years three years maybe some will take longer because War is ugly and it leaves a lot of scars And I think some of the boys it's going to take a lot longer and that's what lodge and pray So these things will Will leave them and eventually they'll become They'll become a true warrior to their people to be a good example to the young people Which is something we don't have today is we don't have very many good examples for our young people to look at and say I'd like to be like him We don't have that and that's Where the warrior is going to play a big part The importance of the family the community or the extended family is a key element in tribal culture It provides stability and the full support of the society The warrior's role is an important one and related to the whole community Tribal customs and medicine help prepare the warrior for battle and bring him back into the community after service Later he is called upon for his wisdom as an advisor and teacher Based on his experience as a warrior Well, the definition of tribe is one of kinship based on kinship lines And that may or may not necessarily be blood ties for example How people relate to each other The roles that people have a good example would be a child growing up Being raised not only by the mother and the father but by aunts and uncles and grandparents An example child may have many grandparents may have many aunts and many uncles And they may not necessarily be blood. They may be friends They may be other people in the community But because the child relates to them the way they would to an aunt an uncle a grandmother A mother a father or a cousin they are considered part of the kinship group. So it's Like an extended family only it extends way out beyond blood ties. It's much more A community type feeling than what we think of when we talk about the extended family and contemporary american culture Which usually includes the grandparents maybe aunts and uncles. This goes way beyond that The family occupies a very important position in this whole thing Rather than treat the warrior as an isolated individual He's being supported From both the people who are older than him and the people who are younger than him in both directions if you will And being acknowledged by everybody that he has contributed something of value something of substance something that was necessary and this Is more than just simply acknowledging that this isn't just a pat on the head And saying well you went off and you did a nice job and let's now go on to business The family itself is taking on the burden and the experience that the warrior had. Well, there's a continuity of From one generation to another there's there's not the So-called generation gap But a passing of knowledge from one generation to the next and an understanding of where people come from way back In the tribal history way way back in the kinship history And extending forward to future generations to come that people will pass on their knowledge And pass on the value Of that kinship group there's a teaching forward and an understanding from past generations of the values and the practices What we're trying to do is through the tribal school is try to try to pass some of these things on But in the past Everything was done within the tioshpa. That's where all the the children the grandchildren The adopted children everybody was educated within that tioshpa but now we're in we're in different times and You don't You don't have these tioshpas anymore. So we're going to have to go to a different system to do it probably like films The tribal school will be able to Teach him many things there, but we won't be able to teach him everything But we'll be able to teach him enough so That they'll have a have a good identity of themselves. At least they're going to know where their roots are, you know, they're not going to have the Emotional problems that they have today not knowing, you know, where they where they came from who they are, you know That's very important to any child is to know who he is and where he's from He's got to have a past that he can relate to The warrior returns Whether the indian combat veteran saw the war as honorable or as a great aberration in the law The effect of combat was the same War was for all of them a shock that reached to the roots of who and what they were I uh, I still have a hard time kind of kind of trying to just let things ride, but I think the hardest time I had over there is Not being able to come home to one time particular My grandfather died My grandfather blessed me before I went over And I found out that he died and I was honoring him by being in a war too, but I couldn't come home then I had a man who Like very much. He was a good friend named Emmanuel Barreras He was married to an Indian woman His wife and he had children He got killed The sad thing about it was that he had a baby. His wife had a baby Never even had a picture of him because he's It's gonna go home and see that child. He's Real real life Never made it And I had to pick him up Was at that time he walked point for me And we got ambushed I'd rather not November the 20th of 1968 We went out on an ambush We killed that we had to kill The only mistake we made was in his battalion area We were 50 feet from his bunker We killed all the executive all the all this higher echelon soldiers We took all this information I lost I said my best friend Terry Clifton And I lost 11 other men And I was left for 12 hours By the government and they're trying to make up their mind whether to come get me or not For 12 hours. I didn't think I could kill anymore And I kill I was so tired of killing I was sick of it I was sick because they would come they kept coming Well, I think there's A myth that floats around that number one all Indians Have warrior societies and their tribes and they're all the Indian warrior on his painted pony with his Eagle feather warp on it rotting off to war and the stoic Indian And there's an idea that people from Tribal cultures are immune to post traumatic stress disorder But the very definition of post traumatic stress disorder is going through a psychic trauma that will cause That type of response and symptoms in almost anyone and Indians are human and when they go through a psychic trauma such as combat It's going to affect them just the way it would any other person And one of my nephews came up from behind me one day and Stuck this toy m14 at me And All I all I remember seeing you he was creeping up on me and I was sitting there and he came up And all I remember seeing was a shadow in that that barrel and I reached down and I grabbed him and I I almost killed my nephew. I was going to smash him. I missed him With the right with the rifle, but and it's just a natural reaction just like that And my sister if my sister hadn't come in and yelled at me, I think I might have heard him, you know And she told me she said Damn, you're crazy. She said you that war made you crazy And I thought I must be crazy So for a long time there I felt real bad It's very important to understand that the giving of the Medicine bag or the ceremony or whatever before the veteran leaves and the welcoming back ceremony May help facilitate readjustment They do not stop The person from getting post-traumatic stress disorder from getting PTSD the person goes through psychic trauma It doesn't really matter what culture they're from In fact, the whole reason for things like the enemy way is because it was understood That a person who goes through that kind of trauma will have these types of problems And this is how we can help this person readjust back from these types of problems If you if you could be sitting here talking and also on the tv like a tv comes on in your head And you can really envision it. You're like watching the movie a sound factor bomb movie And you see all this blood and corn you can't get it out of your mind You don't want to die over here because you're back over here But you feel like you're gonna die It makes you sweat it makes you taste again It makes you feel everything until first time Yeah, you smell you taste it you smell corditis or gunpowder You smell blood you smell intestines It's everything you see you smell and you can touch it again I have flashbacks. I had times of depression I was like I said other than my wife And a few selective friends that I began to make There are very few people in this world I trust And when you can't trust people in the world You're in big trouble That went out and Bought me a pistol Now I was so angry and I said the damn war fucked me up I took the pistol and stuck it in my mouth That's gonna kill myself Said nobody gives a shit about me nobody cares about me. My family's calling me crazy Damn people don't respect me. I have nothing to come home to what the hell am I doing here? Then I remembered my My grandmother my grandfather said anytime things get rough with you Just get away by yourself and pray So I remembered that and I sit there crying and I started praying They taught me some names some sacred names to call on So I said that's what I'll do So I threw that gun away. I didn't throw it away, but I got rid of it I said if I'm gonna attack this problem, I'm gonna have to attack it right See what I can do as far as my relatives and my home communities are concerned They they accepted me I didn't volunteer to go over to v now I was drafted. I was forced to go I went in I served it came back and my relatives My immediate family they accepted me and They noticed that I started experiencing a lot of Social problem. I wasn't the same. I didn't really realize I have changed it that much That's when they started talking about the enemy way ceremony An enemy way ceremony is a seven-day ceremony. It's a ceremony Which allows you to readjust back into society I didn't believe completely believe in the ceremony But I went through it. It did purify me It's real. It's not something that That is just symbolic. I found that it's it's real The main thrust is to bring them back into the Into the tribe to let them know that it's over and to let them know too that everybody else shares that burden So for example, if we were watching Hopi who have a general view of the universe that would require viewing War as a major disruption of the law capital letters We would see them bringing their warriors back in with an idea towards cleansing them of the Taint of the contamination that they picked up just in the same way that we might have people Do an unwelcome job like cleaning out a broken nuclear reactor They come out We'll give them a monetary bonus and praise and all that and then we're going to decontaminate them before they can come back in They're not lesser people. They've done a necessary job But a job that might have hurt them if we don't go about the business of cleansing For an enemy way ceremony to happen, it takes the whole community The immediate family there's a lot of money involved gift-given It's a seven-day ceremony. There's a lot of preparation. The last three days of the ceremony is When it's most busy, there's Several medicine men involved It takes a lot of work. There's a lot of fasting Uh Certain type of food that you have to eat. There's a lot of earth gathering It's a a TD ceremony. It's very tiresome. Uh, there's a lot of songs involved prayers Uh, I personally feel it's it's a really good outlet It's something that the Navajo people still Have they have retained it Many of their uh culture their religion, you know through that ceremony I felt that you know that It's a good thing that we still have it Every summer we still have it There's a number of veterans still going through it. There's a number of veterans that has gone through that ceremony twice There's a number of uh veterans that has really gained it from that ceremony it's Recognized by many of the doctors and in our home communities White Indian doctors and I just hope we Perpetrate the ceremony in some way The ceremonies are kept alive at powwows held around the country The dances the songs the drums all to honor the returning warrior I I came to this year's powwows mainly because I felt A personal interest I felt that I was honoring honoring myself The Indian tribes around the country My tribe the Navajo nation And those that have gave their lives I lost two cousins in Vietnam I lost a brother while he was on active duty I lost some real close relatives. I thought about them when I was out there I was very serious. I didn't joke around I Just felt that I should honor them and those songs You know really that had some special meaning for me I felt tears in my eyes several times thinking of my cousin And I just wish you know, they were here to participate So these powwows really do mean a lot to me. I I feel that I'm here representing my tribe The Indian around the country and also veterans in general the blacks the whites Mexican-Americans all those veterans that has served. I think that we're also honoring them So it gives me special pride, you know to go step out there hold it further It really does give me pride, you know, I show that honor to myself and also to the veterans and in our country in general I had no idea what a powwow was before I went As much as I had read about Indians and spoken in my family and this sort of thing and I went down to this conference and it was a three-day conference and a powwow I believe was the night of the second day and the first day there were a series of lectures and we talked about post-traumatic stress and all these different things and There was not a lot of patience among the participants for that sort of of dialogue. It was it wasn't that it was Irrelevant it was just that that that wasn't the way that that they were going to relate emotionally to this gathering And they kept telling me wait till the dancing starts and It really was one of the most profound things I've ever experienced the first one that they had when 48 tribes were represented from around the country to come in and for the first time in the intertribal association context honor Those who had served in vietnam When they went out For the special dance for the veterans and the first powwow it really was one of the most powerful experiences I've ever seen They started one at a time they came in with the The fancy dancers the people who were dressed up and they had in 16s and then the people who were vietnam veterans were Allowed to to fall behind them and then others fell behind The vietnam veterans I was allowed to to go out and dance because I was a vietnam veteran Sort of snaked until they ran a circle then they turned to the drum And they started screaming And there were guys were crying. There was one guy who was standing next to me who'd been with the first air cavalry Imagine the paradox Someone from a white culture Looking at an individual who's got a blanket on Half of it honors The mexicans that they fought who they fear very strongly about half of it honors the cavalry that they fought in history With the first air cab custer zone patch on it in the back The the combination of that is is is paradoxical and yet this guy was a big man was was standing there and The room was so filled with emotion and his wife Walked up behind him and put her hands on his back and as soon as she touched him like that He cried What we're seeing Is the integration of people back into their culture We're also seeing if you've been watching the pow wow and seeing the children We're seeing the beginning of a contract if you will between some people And each other that says from a very early age If you go if you have to go off and do things like become a warrior, we'll be here to support you The young children that we saw dancing We're being in effect taught That look around you you see these warriors You have to be one. We will be here to not only support you but bring you back in That's an important message for people to get at the very beginning I think we I Decided to go back to my roots The powwows they give me peace of mind They make me feel not as Is it white people look at me? I said, I'm a killer. I'm dirt Indians don't treat me like I'm dirt And embarrasses me when they honor me Because I'm just like anyone else even though I have all these awards they gave me that doesn't make me any different The only thing is is they honor me because I have them I'm not treated like a killer Even though, you know, I did I had to perform and that was my job was as an infantryman was to kill the enemy But to see this I get my peace of mind back. I get tranquility I'm within peace within myself notice that that The more dancers that you get more it comes into a circle What what The circle has always kind of symbolic meaning there's power in the circle. It shows continuity It's A And you'll also notice in the gore dance that that all the warriors face the drum And technically no one's supposed to get in between other than warriors you in in the drum Because what you're doing out there is actually drawing power from that from that From the drum and also from the songs those those songs or warrior songs they're They have been preserved and through time and And even in the words to those songs there there is power. There's medicine there Medicine in the words and in the song An avenue perhaps to begin the treatment of indian vietnam veterans But not the only one and certainly not some sort of magic As with any victim of massive traumatic shock There is a lot of hard work to be done There are many resources available to assist in treatment of the indian veterans because the sweat lodge Takes care of Three things that man is born with that's the mental part of him the physical part of him and the spiritual part of him And the biggest part of man is the spiritual part of him So if you don't continue to fill that big void there, uh, you're going to be off balance You have to get yourself back in balance these three things back in balance And that's what the sweat lodge does A lot of these indian veterans go to a VA hospital. So they need a doctor. They need a psychologist They need a doctor a medical doctor for his body And they need a a minister or a priest for his spiritual part But if you come in a sweat lodge, uh, that's all taken care of at once All those three things that we're born with and I think that's why a person Comes in feeling bad and when he comes out, he's in balance there for a while And what he needs to do is keep that balance. Don't let it get on balance again Keep keep that in balance and you're going to be all right. There are a lot of guys a lot of street indians and other Indians alike that are walking around Confused and unable to define or or explain that problem or explain what's wrong with them And it's insight and They're they're really crying and they and the only way they express this Is probably, you know, through alcoholism and anger physical abuse and so forth upon themselves or the others and It's uh It's trying to reach these guys who come in, you know into the vet center and trying to To let these guys know that they're not the lone ranger and they're not alone out there and these guys It's a system that they're so scared of and being Not oriented to their needs and coming back and people not understanding what has happened and What they have been through is very hard on them very hard In some ways if if clinicians will outreach to Indian health agencies It's a way of bringing Indians into say the vet centers are more into the VA system The walls need to be broken down the the clinician needs to understand That An Indian is not an Indian is not an Indian and so you have to have a whole myriad of of resources to plug that person into and to be aware of On reservations BIA social services BIA mental health things Indian health service or maybe the tribal health facilities They've been too isolated and we haven't done the training in the area post-traumatic stress with those mental health people That we really need to be doing those are other resources that the clinician can use Medicine people both in urban settings and in On reservations, um, they have an immense store of knowledge that the clinician can draw on But it's again, it's a seeking out and and needing to know What the resources are and when they're appropriate And the best thing to do is to ask the veteran you How do you feel about your culture? Are you involved in these kinds of things? Would this be useful to you? Are you aware that this is available? I consider myself as a warrior. Yes, that's It's something that gives me pride honor not that because I want to Vietnam and kill other people I felt that you know, this is something that I didn't want to do in the first place I felt that I have served my country because my country has called upon me to serve in in in Vietnam I Felt that I have done my my part And I felt that I You know, I have gained it some honor out of that I would say that from my experience With Vietnam I would say that If there was ever another I wouldn't want him to go through what I what I went through But it would be his choice the experience in in Vietnam was Probably one of the first times that I can say that I was scared I know what fear is I know what death is one of the one of the As you grow older one of the things that You are better able to understand is the decision that you make in your everyday life And to and to broaden your thinking And to take into consideration that warrior status To think for your family your relatives and your people For the better of them if the if that sort of thinking Puts you into a leadership role That you can't deny it The people aren't going to allow you to deny it Because they'll put you there Depending on how strict how strict of a standard you set for yourself With those values that you've gained You know anytime you leave your area and you go to a foreign land You have You have you have where you've been exposed to dead bodies Or you have anything to do with death you step on blood You touch the enemies and all this and you must have a cleansing ceremony done And I haven't had this and In doing so hopefully I can Become whole a whole person again and Both being from the non-union world and the Indian world and making myself One with nature again. I believe I'm out of tune and I get myself back into tune. It's My beliefs are gradually changing towards anyways and hopefully in time I'll I'll learn more about it And one way would be to get this done for myself To go through the traditional healing ceremony, you know to Get all the bad spirits away from me When I stopped drinking and Found that I had to have a purpose in life and then along comes my two children That I had to put My feelings And a lot of Wants aside The old warrior instinct came back and I had to preserve the people had to preserve my family And as a warrior in our people Your family or your people come first You protect them you do all you can for them Your life is to be given for them you live for them And I've been taught that And that comes first in my life as my family my little ones And my immediate my immediate family and the rest of my my Indian people coming But I take care of those that are around me And I work for them and I try to do things. So if I attain this degree this master said I'm able to To go on to really provide for them and at the same time Build up enough that I I'll be able to help others In the meantime, I try to work this war out of my system