 In an alternate universe, you woke up tomorrow. You were a man. You're a black man. Describe it as much detail. Physical attributes, mental attributes, financial attributes. You go whichever way you want to go. What type of man would you be? That's a good question, right? It's a great question. I would be a hoe. I'm being honest. Like, I would be a hoe. I want to slay this thing, right? When I wake up, I want to wake up like, I want to see how it feels, you know? I want to, you know, be packing. It's okay. Yeah. My first, like, when I'm having a conversation, just joking around, like, I'd be one of those men that ain't shit. One of those ones that, you know, love them, leave them, do my thing, because it's easier to be a guy in my head. Okay, athletic, not necessarily an athlete, but, you know, everybody want to find his man or whatever. I like a bigger guy. I'm 6'1", so that takes a lot of candidates out right there. Hight is a factor for me here. I'd probably be a square, honestly. I'd be like, super nice and kind. I'd probably read Harry Potter. I feel like I'd be like, a guy version of me, but with man conditioning. We're kind of manned. We're kind of... Oh. Why are we? Why? Why? Oh. I would be the type of man that is very nurturing, can really sense my significant other, people around me, sense their energy, sense their vibe. Like, I just had that nature of being a provider, not like financially, but mentally and spiritually. Probably the average person wouldn't look at me and think that I was like a masculine man, because I don't think that I'd be like aggressive or whatever, but I still think that I would be like a protector type. But yeah, I think I'd be like a nerd boy mixed with like athlete, mixed with like a sweetie pie family person kind of situation. Like I have a four year old son, so it's like I'm trying to raise him. You know, I know the statistics, what statistics it say about black men. You know, just him being a young black boy, like, are you right? I don't know. As a woman, I really can't even say what type of man I would want to be if I woke up tomorrow. I just would want to at least, at least have some of my doubts in a row, be able to provide, be something, be somebody. Wake up and be somebody. I don't want to wake up and be nobody. I know too many nobodies. That's interesting. I don't know. I mean, I would say I get up, shower, get myself together, make sure I take care of my skin, make sure my hair looking good, make sure I'm dressed well, and then hop in the car and go to work. I don't know. Like a nigga that can go to work in the suit can be the same nigga that get off work and put that Nike suit on and fucking go hoot with his boys. That can be the same dude. I'm gonna get up, do what niggas do, get in the shower, get out the shower. Probably not put on any lotion. I always say, y'all don't put on a lot of shit. I'm gonna go out to the mall and pick up some shorties, get their number. I may hit up a couple of them later. I'm gonna get one for lunch. No, one for brunch, one for lunch, one for dinner. See what they had in it. And whichever one I like the best, I'm smashing her that night. Like, yeah. But if I'm putting it into real terms and thinking like if I woke up tomorrow, what kind of man would I wanna be? I'd wanna emulate the men in my life that make me remember and make me have the sense that all men aren't bad. Men like my brother, like Seth Lee, people like that, I'd wanna be a man of value, integrity, someone who put family before everything else and then work second because to me, a man who doesn't work doesn't eat. Now, let's just get it straight now. My husband was all of that, but I didn't think of that though. I still was attractive to him and he just happened to be the man, you know? But I don't even know if that's real. I hear people say that, but I think women and my husband always go back and forth with me on this and y'all can do it too. But I think women just want men to love them. I think if the right man shows up and loves them without all these terms and conditions that they'll submit to that man. It just has to be genuine and organic. But in the meantime, if I got to go out there and look for him, okay, he has to be six feet. He's gotta be attractive. He's gotta be this. He's gotta be that. And so that's how we miss each other. I don't think I'll be very different from what I am as a woman. At least I don't hope or I don't think so. I think my general attributes about myself, my authenticity, my care for people and my core values will remain the same. I don't know. I would be the man that I would wanna date, I think. Oftentimes what I see is a bunch of men out here taking advantage of women that are my friends, people that I love and cherish and no deserve better. So I accept one with core integrity values, one who works hard, one who gives back because a lot of the great men that I know are ones who don't just rest on being great to themselves and the people that are closest to them. They're ones that give it back to the community. They start foundations to help other young black men in situations to mentor them, teach them, educate them. So I think I'd be one of the upstanding ones. The type of man, I don't know, I would look at myself like a superhero. So tall, six foot, broad shoulders, dark, like midnight, deep voice, very piercing eyes to get to your soul. And I wouldn't wear a cape, not at all, but you would see the six pack. And I would really hold myself to a high regard as if I'm just unfasable. And I just, when I think about a black man and what black, what black men mean to me, I would put me in essence of a superhero, if that makes sense, because I don't know that's how I see you guys. I know for me, it took me a lot of growing and learning before I started gravitating towards that kind of dude because I was used to, my dad, this is maybe gonna be really bad, but he's probably never gonna watch this. So my dad is kind of like that, like center of attention, life of the party, super charismatic, like can pull any girl he wants into that kind of dude. And I think that's just what I was attracted to because that's who my dad was. And that's how I thought that men were supposed to be. And I got older and I started learning that my dad was really not the kind of man that I wanted to date at all. I really wouldn't recommend anybody dating him, but he is married currently, so I hope they are doing well. But so I started trying to, I started figuring out what mindset changes I really need to make in order to have the kind of relationship I actually desired to have. I would love to be an entrepreneur, like that's what I am. So as a male, I would definitely be the same. So maybe not necessarily clocking into work, but going to do whatever my perspective duties would be for my job, for my business. And then just like getting up with, I guess my boys afterward, I don't know, like get a couple drinks. I don't know what y'all be doing. Like I don't got a man, so. Okay, tell me about the attributes that would make the male version of you distinct from the female version of you. So for instance, like if you're sensitive, I would also want him to be sensitive or I would be less sensitive. Like what are the means? No, absolutely less sensitive. Very more logical. Cause I'm really, I'm trying to tap into that part of me to get more logical cause I can tend to be overly sensitive and act like a crybaby. I think the sense of or the urge to have power would be a little bit exemplified if I was a man. I don't think I would be, I don't want to say power hungry, but I would. I would want to climb any kind of ladder, any kind of corporate ladder to be at the top. So I wouldn't. I kind of think as a woman, I kind of subdue that a lot because it does bring on a lot of masculine traits that I can have. So I try to kind of relax and try to let other people lead. But I have so many ideas and things that I can see and how things can work. So I try to, it's weird, but I try to get that across, but still try to be a woman because God knows I can be a little overbearing maybe sometimes. I think probably the things that I already, or I feel like I'm a lack now, which would be a little bit more confidence cause that's something that I admire in men and not that I don't admire it in women, but I feel like it's more acceptable in guys to have like that dominant energy that like, I don't want to say alpha male cause that sounds kind of toxic, but like that alpha figure, like where you kind of like can dominate a room. I think I would really like want my male version to tell me like that, you know? Don't nobody want no soft dude, no punk. Everybody want, like I said, protection. I want to feel safe with you. You know what I'm saying? Like I want to be able to remember that movie, temptation and them dudes was harassing them and he ain't do nothing. And she went home feeling so vulnerable and unsafe because he didn't do his job as a man and beat them niggas up. Regardless if he was gonna get jumped, it was five of them. However, it was the effort into wanting to protect your girl. That's all that matters. Even if you can't even fight for real, at least go into it knowing that you showing her that you gon' like, you know what I'm saying? He has to be relatively attractive or what you would find attractive. Yeah, what I would find attractive. His beard has to connect, different things like that. There's solutions for that. Do you have a light skinned, dark skinned preference? I used to think I have one, but no. Okay, cool. He has to be in decent physical shape, right? Not morbidly obese or... Not morbidly, but I like bigger guys. Okay, cool, so you're a little flexible there. Okay. What percentage of the population is this black man? That I just described. Probably like two. In our community, a lot of times we hear about everything that's wrong with black men. And so I could ask a woman, who's your ideal black man? But I think when you put them in the shoe of become your ideal black man and describe him and make it make sense, it makes it, you know, it drives the point, you know, home. So like what do you think are some challenges that the male version of you would have? The male version of me, that's a good question. I don't. You know, I would probably say maybe monogamy. Break that down. Let's get in. Because I know how I would command the attention. And I know women would really fawn over me because they easily would just fawn over someone that pays them no mind that they look up to. And me being a superhero of course, it would be falling all over me. And I think I would bask in the attention.