 Amen. All right. Well, thank you very much for being here tonight. It's a great turnout here on a Sunday afternoon, a Sunday evening. I appreciate you coming and I just want to say that we are praying for all of you in Sacramento and we're proud of the work that's being done here. We, of course, miss you all and all of you that were coming up there, we miss you and the Pizarra family is dearly missed, except for Garrett, but everybody else is dearly missed and I'm just kidding, just kidding, Garrett. I don't know where he went, he's back there, but I like to joke with Garrett. Tonight I want to preach a sermon and it's a very specific sermon and I hope that's okay. Sometimes on a Sunday night we like to kind of have a teaching session and a time to really dig down into our beliefs and what the Bible teaches. Tonight I'm preaching on the subject of being a family-integrated church and I don't know if you know that, I don't know if you know this, but you are sitting in a family-integrated church and what that means is that here at Verity Baptist Church we do not separate children from their parents for any reason. In fact we allow and encourage for parents to sit with their children in church and if you're new to church, if this is the only church you've ever been a part of, maybe you're not aware of this, but most churches are not like this. Most churches have children's ministries and nurseries where children are asked to not be in the service and they are actually separated from their parents and we've chosen a different model here at our church and we actually allow for kids to be in the service, we encourage it, we've got mother-baby rooms that are now fully secluded, but we've got mother-baby rooms that are meant to be places where children can be taken and you can still watch the service and listen to it and family-integrated means we don't separate children from their parents for any reason. Now that makes our church very unique, it makes our type of church very unique and in fact it's one of the main reasons why people even come to a church like ours. When you think of a church like Verity here in Fresno or a church like Verity in Sacramento we've got lots of people that commute from long distances to go to a church like this and one of the reasons is because we're family-integrated because they know that they're not going to be asked to have their kids taken somewhere in a different part of the building with someone they don't know and things like that. The family-integrated model makes our church very unique and it's the reason that a lot of people have chosen a church like this, one of the main reasons that a church is chosen like this. Now what I want you to know is this, that I'm not preaching tonight on why we are a family-integrated church. That would be a great sermon to preach and maybe at another time we can do that. There's many reasons why we've chosen to be family-integrated. One of the reasons is because this is the pattern found in Scripture and in the Bible when we as Baptists have decided that the Bible is our final authority in all matters of faith and practice and we look to the Bible to get our patterns and our models from then when you open up the Bible here's what you don't see, you don't see nurseries, you don't see children's church, you don't see Sunday school, you don't see these things pattern. In fact in the Bible the pattern that you see is having the children in the service with you. And again I'm not preaching on that tonight but let me just give you one example of that. You're there in Ephesians chapter 6. I'd like you to keep your place there. We're going to come right back to it but go with me just real quickly to the book of Colossians. So if you're there in Ephesians you're going to go past the book of Philippians into the book of Colossians. Colossians chapter 4 and I want you to notice what the Apostle Paul says in verse 16. Colossians chapter 4 and verse 16. Here the Apostle Paul is writing to the church at Colossae. He's written this epistle and I want you to notice what he says in verse 16. And when this epistle is read among you, cause that it be read also in the church of the Laodiceans and that ye likewise read the epistle from Laodicea. What I want you to notice is that when the Apostle Paul wrote these letters, these epistles that we see written to churches, the epistles written to the church in Corinth and then of course to the Philippians and to the Ephesians and the Colossians and the Galatians and the Thessalonians. These epistles, the Apostle Paul meant for these epistles to be read in the congregation just like we just had Brother Garrett get up and preach an entire, read an entire chapter of Ephesians chapter 6. He wrote these letters under the inspiration of the Holy Ghost and then instruction was given that these epistles be read among you cause that it be read also in the church. So these letters were meant to be read within the congregation. Now I made that point to say this, if you go back to Ephesians chapter 6 and you look at verse number 1, I want you to notice that Paul addresses the children in the epistle that he wrote that was meant to be read during the congregation. He said, Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. Honor thy father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise that it may be dwell with thee and thou mayest live long on the earth. And I want you to notice that the Apostle Paul is addressing the children because he is fully expecting the children to be sitting in the service. He's expecting them to be sitting there while the epistle is being read and he's not only noticing verse 5, he addresses the servants. He says, Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters. And then in verse 9 he addresses the masters. He says the masters do the same thing unto them. In chapter 5 he addresses husbands and he addresses wives. He's addressing all these different individuals because he fully expects them to be there. So I want you to notice that the pattern in the New Testament is to have children in the service with their parents. So we're family integrated because it's the pattern found in Scripture. Not only that, we're family integrated because it protects children. We'll go into that later in the sermon. But it allows children to be with the people that are most qualified to protect them, which is their parents. We don't take children away from their parents and put them with a stranger and somebody that we don't know. And you don't have to go very far to hear of news of having wicked reprobates come into churches and use those churches as a place to be able to isolate children and hurt children. And then of course we're family integrated because it is the family integrated model that allows you to partner with parents. We're not partnering against parents but we're partnering with parents. And what you find in many churches that have children's church ministries or youth groups, what you'll find is that sometimes those ministries compete with the parents. The youth pastors competing with the parents for the heart of that teenager and we don't want to do that as a family integrated church. We want to partner with the parents alongside them and help them to learn. So like I said, there's reasons why we are family integrated and I'm not preaching that. I preach an entire sermon and if you're interested you can go on our website veritybaptist.com and search for the sermons. I preach the sermon called Why We Are a Family Integrated Church and we go through and break that down and I give a lot of scripture in regards to why we are family integrated. Tonight, the sermon tonight, this is all by way of introduction. I hope that's okay. I drove three hours to get here so I'm going to try to get all the information that I have for you tonight. But tonight, the sermon is not meant to teach you or convince you why we are family integrated but the sermon is meant to teach you how to get the best use out of your family integrated church because you are sitting in a family integrated church. And many of you have chosen and we're thankful for it that you've chosen to make this church your church home. But this may be the first time you've ever been part of a family integrated church. This may be the first time you've ever even really been included in a church where there are no children's ministries, there are no nurseries and maybe there's a little bit of a learning curve when it comes to being able to learn how this all works and what I want to do tonight is I want to give you a very specific sermon a very practical applicable sermon on how to get the most out of your family integrated church and how to make this work the best for you. Here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to give you 10 ways, 10 tips to get the most out of your family integrated church on your bulletin that I saw that on the back there's a place for you to write down some notes. If you've got a pen and if you don't have a baby sitting on your lap because this is a family integrated church then I would encourage you to write down some notes and maybe write these things down. But I want to help you understand. So we're not talking about why we're family integrated. We have reasons why we're family integrated. But I want to help you with this idea of how to get the most out of your family integrated church how to make it work for you the best. So I'm going to give you 10 tips. I'd love for you to write these down. You're there in Ephesians 6. Let me give you the first point and then we'll look at verse 4. Point number one is this. And we're going to go through these quickly. I've got 10 of them. Point number one is this. Fathers, you need to set the example for your family and you need to sit with your family during the church service. Fathers need to set the example for their children, for their families and sit with their families during the church service. Are you there in Ephesians 6? Look at verse 4. Ephesians chapter 6 and verse 4. The Bible says this. And you fathers, provoke not your children to wrath. Notice what the Bible says. It says, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. And here's what the Bible teaches men. The Bible teaches that when you are a dad, when you are a father, you are supposed to be the spiritual leader of your home. You're supposed to be the one who sets the example and who holds the hand of your family and brings them up, who carries them along the way, who makes sure that they get to the destination of being the example for your children. And look, when it comes to the family integrated church setting, it's your job, dad, to set the example. And the best way for you to set the example in church is to sit with your family during the church service. Now this is an important aspect of family integrated church for me because before I was a pastor, my wife and I went to an old IFB church, you should call it an old IFB church. And we liked this church. It was a fine church. And obviously there were some doctrinal things we disagreed with, but we liked it. It was a soul winning church. It was a growing church. It was exciting. But one thing we could not stand was that they had this culture there where men never sat with their wives. And it literally seemed like no husband ever sat with his wife. And you know, we thought that was odd. And my wife and I always sat next to each other in church, but it was just kind of this cultural thing. And I've noticed that this can happen. Even at our church in Sacramento, I've noticed and I realized that sometimes you've got people providing security or being ushers or whatever. There might be reasons why a man is not sitting with their families, but even when you have ministry, you know, someone's providing security. So they're maybe sitting in the foyer or something like that. People can see that. And if you don't talk about it, they can seem to think, oh, well that's how it's done. And now all of a sudden you've got husband sitting over here, wife sitting over here. This is not the way that a family integrated church should be. In a family integrated church, the whole point is this, you're integrated with your family. You're sitting there with your family. You chose to come to church where you don't separate from your family. So don't separate from your family. Dad, make sure you set the example. Make sure you sit with your family. You say, well, why does it matter? Why is it important to set that example and to sit with your family? Here's why it's important because you want to create, you want to create the memories for your kids that they think back on. And one of the beautiful memories that I have as a kid, you know, today I'm a 33-year-old man, a pastor of a couple of churches and we've started churches and the Lord has blessed our ministry. And I have memories of being a kid sitting in church with my siblings sitting next to me and my mother sitting next to me and my father sitting next to me. I have memories of my dad, you know, tapping on my shoulder and saying, sing during the singing service. And I have memories of my mom and dad singing in church and having their Bibles open and flipping the pages and taking notes and paying attention and being engaged in debt. You may not realize it, but your kids, especially your younger children, you are a hero to them and when they see you engaged, when they see you excited, when they see you saying, amen, that excites them and it creates the example that maybe one day they'll follow. So that's, so that's, make sure you say, what's the best way to get the most out of my family integrated church? Make sure you sit with your family. Make sure you set the example. Make sure you sit with them. Make sure they see you, turn the pages. Make sure they see you, open the hymn book. Make sure they see you sing the songs. They say, well, I don't know how to sing. Even better, let them have memories of dad who couldn't carry a tune in a bucket, but he's saying because he loved the Lord. Let them hear you make a joyful noise unto the Lord. Let them have that experience and be that example for your children. Are there any Ephesians 6, look back at Ephesians 5. Let me give you a second tip for getting the most out of your family integrated church. Father set the example, sit with your family during church. And definitely don't be the dad. Don't be that dad that gives the example to his children that church is a place where we mess around. Church is a place where we pull out our cell phone and we're kind of on Facebook. Church is a place where we fall asleep. Church is a place, don't set a bad example. Make sure you set a good example and make sure you sit with your family. Here's point number two, husbands. I'm going to pick on the dads and the men here for a little bit that I'm going to get under the ladies a little bit. Here's point number two, husbands. How do you get the most out of your family integrated church? Number one, fathers set the example and sit with your family. Number two, husbands, and hopefully this is the same guy in one family, husbands take the baby from time to time to allow your wife to sit through the church service. And when I say time to time, here's what I mean by that. Like once a week, all right? Because not only does the Bible teach, dad, that you are the spiritual leader of your children and you are to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, but the Bible also teaches husband that you are the spiritual leader of your wife. Are you there in Ephesians 5? Look at verse 25. Ephesians chapter 5 and verse 25. Notice what the Bible says. Ephesians 5-25 says this, husbands, love your wives. Even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it. Notice that he might sanctify and cleanse it. So we're told to love our wives like Christ loved the church. And then here's what Christ did for the church. That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of the water by the word. That he might present it to himself, a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should be holy and without blemish. And here's what the Bible is saying. That we as husbands are to love our wives and minister to our wives in the same way that Christ loves and ministers for the church. And then here's what Christ did for the church. He sacrificed himself for it, but then he also sanctifies it. He cleanses it. He washes it with the water by the word, and he presents it to himself, a glorious church. And here's the teaching, husband. The teaching is this, that you are the spiritual leader of your home. And please get those guys, and if there's anything you need to get tonight, you need to get this. And if you're a man, and if you're married, and it is this, that it is your job, it is your job, you are to see to the spiritual well-being of your wife. If you're the spiritual leader, you're to bring up your children in the nurtured admonition of the Lord. And you are to see to the spiritual well-being of your wife. And with that said, the idea is this, if your wife has small children and a family-integrated church which I believe in and a family-integrated church which I started and I believe, it should be started and every church we've ever started, I think VBC Fresno is now the fifth church that we've started over the last nine years and every single one has been family-integrated. None of them have had children. I believe in it. I believe in the concept. I believe in the pattern. But let me tell you something. A family-integrated church is a place where a young mother, where a mother with young children get totally backslidden because of the fact that they're constantly taking their children out of the service. They're constantly taking their children out of the preaching service. And if they don't have help, it could be a place where a lady gets backslidden and listen to me, dad, and listen to me, father or husband. And you need to ask yourself this question and you may need to actually ask this question out loud to your wife. I'm saying on the drive home tonight, you may need to just look at your wife and ask this question. When was the last time you sat through a church service? When was the last time you even sat through a sermon? When's the last time you were even sitting under the preaching of the Word of God? And if you don't know, and if she doesn't know, and if you can't even remember the last time your wife was in church, husband, you need to take that baby and let your wife sit in church. You need to take that child from time to time. I'm not saying every service you're in the mother-baby room. Don't do that, okay? Brother Jared and brother Angel will have a fit, right? Don't go in that mother-baby room. But you need to take that baby from time to time. You're not nursing, so you don't need privacy. You can sit back there, you know? And let your wife sit in church because it's your job to see to the spiritual well-being of your children. And you know, honestly, as a pastor, this is a burden that I have, even at our church in Sacramento, because as a pastor and brother Jared would understand this as being the main preacher here, it's difficult for us to set this example because we're the ones that are preaching, right? So in our church in Sacramento, my family has six young children. We've got anywhere from a one-year-old to a 12-year-old. And my wife, practically speaking, is a single mom in every service because her husband's always the one usually doing the preaching. So it's hard for us to set this example. I was hoping that tonight, Brother Jared would sit next to Garrett, and I could use him. See, he's taking the responsibility of Garrett so that I'm just kidding, of course. I just like to joke around with Garrett. I really like Garrett, all right? But, you know, it's hard for us to set this example. So when we can't set this example, let me say it out loud. You should take the baby. You should give your wife a break and make sure she sits in church because, look, Father, it's your job, it's your job to bring up your children in the nurtured animation of the Lord. And, husband, it is your job to make sure that your wife is sanctified and cleansed with the washing of the water by the Word. Now, I'd like you to keep your place or any Ephesians. We're going to come right back to it. But go to 1 Thessalonians, chapter 5. 1 Thessalonians, chapter 5. So are there any Ephesians? You're going to go Philippians, Colossians, 1 Thessalonians, 1 Thessalonians, chapter 5. And let me give you the third tip. Here's tip number one. Father, set the example. Sit with your family. Here's tip number two. Husbands, take the baby. Once a week, take the baby to allow your wife to sit through a church service. Here's tip number three, ladies. All right, so guys, you can relax a little bit. We're going to get on ladies for a little bit. Ladies, do not use the mother-baby room as a fellowship area during the church service. When you are sitting in the mother-baby room, the mother-baby room is not an area that is meant to be a place to fellowship during the church service. The mother-baby room, we'll talk about this here later on in the sermon, is meant to be a training place to get your kids in the service so that you can be part of a family-integrated church where you sit in church with your kids in the service. And we realize that sometimes your kids are young and they need a training area, so we provide a training area. And sometimes you need privacy, so we provide privacy. But the purpose of church is to come and be with God's people. It's not to sit in fellowship in a room while other people are having preaching or listening to preaching and having someone preach to them. Are you there in 1 Thessalonians 5? Look at verse 20. Notice what the Bible says. 1 Thessalonians 5.20. It says despise. You see that word despise? The word despise means to consider worthless or unworthy of my attention. It says despise, not prophesies. Now prophesying there is talking about preaching. It's what I'm doing right now. A lot of times when we think of prophesying, we think of like telling the future. But a lot of times in the Bible, the word prophesying is just talking about preaching or proclaiming the word of God. And here in 1 Thessalonians 5, we are commanded not to despise preaching. We are commanded to despise not preaching. To not look at preaching as something that is unworthy of my attention or worthless. Let me tell you something. No matter who it is, when somebody who saved who has the Holy Spirit of God and has a King James Bible stands up to preach the word of God, it's worth your attention. It's worth you being there. It's worth you paying attention. It's worth you listening. You say pastor, you know, is there ever anything that's more important than showing up to church and listening to me? I'm not. I don't know many of you and I'm not trying to hurt your feelings. But I will tell you this. If you're ever wondering, ah, should I skip church this morning? Should I skip church tonight? Should I skip Bible study? You know, ask yourself and ask God. God, is there anything going on that's more important than me listening to your word being preached? Because I'll tell you the Super Bowl is not it. And the Emmys aren't it and the Grammys aren't it and whatever you got going on or you want to look, here's what I believe, the Bible is the most valuable thing we have on planet Earth and when somebody stands up to preach the precious word of God, we ought to pay attention. We ought to despise, not prophesy. God gave you a church and God gave you a Bible and God gave you a preacher to help you grow. You're there in 1 Thessalonians 5. Go to 2 Timothy 3. 2 Timothy 3. 1 Thessalonians 2 Thessalonians. 1 Timothy 2 Timothy 2 Timothy 3. Look at verse 16. 2 Timothy 3 16, the Bible says this. All Scripture is given by inspiration of God. All Scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness. These are all things that we try to do when we preach God's word. And we preach God's word and it's for doctrine. And we're teaching doctrine. And Brother Jared might get up and preach a sermon about why we believe in eternal security or why we believe in the post-trib pre-wrapture and it might be a type of sermon that's dealing with doctrine and the Bible says that all Scripture is given by inspiration of God and it's profitable for doctrine. It might be for reproof. It might be to just tell you, hey, here's a warning, here's a warning. I think the boot series is probably a reproof series. Let me give you a warning. These are the things that are not acceptable in church and that God tells us that we must not take lightly. It might be for correction. It might be for instruction. That's what I'm doing tonight. I'm preaching an instructional sermon. I'm instructing you. Here's the best way for you to get the most out of your family-integrated church. But here's what I'm telling you. That the word of God, all Scripture is given by inspiration of God and it's profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction and righteousness. Notice verse 17, that the man of God may be perfect. The word perfect means complete. It means whole. Thoroughly furnished unto all good works. The word furnished means equipped. The Bible says that when we learn the Bible, it equips us and it helps us to be furnished unto all good works. Ephesians chapter 4. Ephesians chapter 4, if you kept your place there in Ephesians, you just head back. Ephesians chapter 4 and look at verse number 11. Ephesians chapter 4 and verse 11. The Bible tells us not to despise, not prophesying. The Bible tells us that all Scripture is profitable, that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works. The Bible tells us in Ephesians chapter 4 verse 11, it says, and he gave some apostles and some prophets and some evangelists and some pastors and teachers. He's talking about these positions that he's given, these leadership positions. He gave some apostles. He gave some prophets. He gave some evangelists. He gave some. He gave this church, Verity Baptist Church Fresno. He gave you a pastor and a teacher, right? Brother Jared stands up and he teaches and preaches the Word of God every week. Why did he do that? For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ. Do you know that we don't stand up here week after week and expound upon God's Word just because we like to hear ourselves speak? I mean, it's a lot of work to study the Bible and to come up with sermons and to look at the Word of God and to pray to God and to have the Holy Spirit lead us and to say, Lord, what do I need to preach? What would you have me to say? What would be helpful to your people? What is it that you want our church to hear? Hey, why do we do that work? What's the point of it? The point of it is this, to help you become a mature Christian. To help you grow in grace and in the knowledge of our Lord and Savior and ladies when you are in the mother-baby room and you're using the mother-baby room as a fellowship area and you're in there talking or you're on your phone and you're not paying attention during the church service, you're despising prophesying. You need to be in there listening to the preaching because the Word of God is powerful. The Bible says for the Word of God is quick and powerful and sharp with an 8-2-H sword and the only thing that's going to help you, the only thing that's going to help you in your marriage, with your childbearing and your relationships, with your finances and whatever area you need to help in, it's the Word of God. So when you have a man of God standing up week after week and expounding upon the Word of God to try to help you, you've got to listen. You've got to pay attention. You've got to not use the mother-baby room as a fellowship area during the church service because you're hurting yourself and you're hurting your children because you know what those kids need? They need a mom who's godly and who's spiritual and who knows the Bible and who knows what the Bible says and that's what we're trying to provide for you at Verity Baptist Church. That's what you need. And look, you say, are you guys against fellowship? We're not against fellowship. We help early, stay late, come to the harvest party. We do a lot of fellowship but when the Bible gets open, it's time to listen. Amen. When the man of God stands up to preach, it's time to pay attention. It's time to be edified with the Word of God. I'm just trying to teach you how to get the best, how to get the most, how to get the best use out of your family integrated church. Say, how do you do it? Well, you do it by dad. It's setting the example. Sit with your family. You do it by husbands, helping your wives because it's your job to help them grow and to see for their spiritual well-being. So you help them with the children so they can sit in church from time to time. And we realize that that's not always going to happen. So ladies, moms, when you're in the mother-baby room, don't use the mother-baby room as a fellowship area during the church service. You got to pay attention. You got to be paying attention. And let me say this, ladies, maybe you're in the mother-baby room and you're just like, I don't really care. This is my husband's thing. I'm just here because I have to be here. Maybe, and I hope that's not the case, maybe you're not spiritual and maybe you don't care. But that doesn't mean that the other ladies in that room aren't spiritual and don't care. They might want to listen to the preaching. They might actually care what the Bible says. They might want to actually hear what God has prepared through Brother Jared to be able to be applied to their lives. So don't be a distraction while you're in the mother-baby room. You say, well, I don't care. Yeah, but maybe they do. So try to use the mother-baby room as a training area. Try to use the mother-baby room as a training area for your children. We'll talk about that here in a minute. Go to 1 Timothy chapter 3. 1 Timothy chapter 3. We're just there if you got 1 Thessalonians, 2 Thessalonians, 1 Timothy. 1 Timothy chapter 3. Let me give you the fourth tip. Here's the fourth tip for a family-integrated church. Keep your kids from running or rough-housing before and after the church services. Keep your kids from running or rough-housing before and after the church services. 1 Timothy chapter 3 and verse 15, the Bible says this, but if I tarry long, that thou mayest know how thou artest to behave thyself in the house of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and ground of the truth. And the Bible says that thou artest, he says how thou artest to behave thyself in the house of God. And look, there's a certain way that we ought to behave ourselves in the house of God. There's a certain way that we ought to behave ourselves and we ought not treat the things of God just like their common things. Do you understand that? Now look, we realize and please understand this, we realize that a church is not a building. This building, Verdi Baptist Church Fresno is not this location. Verdi Baptist Church Fresno is you. A church is a group of believers. It's a called-out assembly. It's a congregation of believers that come together. We understand that. We comprehend that. There's nothing special about this building. There's nothing special about these walls and this ceiling. There's nothing special about that. But please understand this, that whenever we approach God and we approach the service of God, we ought to approach it in a holy fashion. The Bible says that we ought to approach it with seriousness. That's why I like the rules and we have the same rules in Sacramento. You say, why can't I just show up to the men's preaching night and why do I have to wear a shirt and tie and why do I have to go solo and why do I have to do these things? You got this rule in that rule. Why does it matter? We tell our guys, you need to wear a shirt and tie if you're going to preach the word of God. Why does it matter? Here's the thing. You're not special. I'm not special. No one's here special. But this book is special. This book is God's word and we're going to stand up and preach his word. We're going to do it in a way that is serious and somber and holy. And you know, in the house of God, and we're not talking about not having a good time, but in the house of God, you got to teach your kids how to behave in the house of God. You got to keep them from running a rough housing before and after the church service. And please understand this. I'm not saying that kids need to be, you know, little robots and not be allowed to do anything. I'm not talking about sedating your children before you come to church. You know, you have some sort of a ritual where you give them all Advil before you show up because you need them to be knocked out or something. Please don't do that. We're not talking about that. Kids should be allowed to play, especially after a church service. They go to a family integrated church. They didn't get to go to children's church and play all day. They've been sitting in a church service so let them play, let them run around, but to an extent you need to keep an eye on children and not allow them to get too rambunctious. Not allow them to get too out of control. Not allow them to, look, there's a limit. There's a limit and a balance to everything. Please let your kids have a good time. Let them play. Let them hang out with their friends and let them, you know, while you fellowship. But look, when they're having a full blown, you know, tackle football session in the auditorium, maybe you need to step in. All right? Maybe they've gone too far. And literally, you think I'm joking. I mean, we've had situations where kids are throwing a football, you know, in the auditorium after church. And it's kind of like, okay, parents, you know, maybe you should say something now. You know, you got balls flying through, you know, past the heads of visitors and things. And here's what I'm saying. Keep your kids, because we're talking about a family integrated church. We don't have a separate area where we put them somewhere into some other room. They're with us. So let's teach them how to act when they're around us. And let's keep your kids from running a rough housing before and after the church service. Go to 2 Peter chapter 2. 2 Peter chapter 2. You're there in 1 Timothy. You're going to go past 2 Timothy, Titus, Philemon, Hebrews, James, 1 Peter. 2 Peter chapter 2. I'm giving you tips for getting the most use out of your family integrated church. We talked about Dad setting the example, sitting with their family. We talked about husbands helping their wives and taking the baby from time to time to allow their wives to sit through the service. We talked about ladies not using the mother-baby room as a fellowship area. We talked about keeping your kids from rough housing. Here's another one. Point number 5. This may be the most important point. Point number 5 to getting the most use out of your family integrated church is this. Always watch your kids, period. Always watch your kids. People get this idea. They come to a family integrated church because they don't want to send their kids off somewhere where they're not watching them, where they might get abused or hurt by some reprobate stranger. And then they come to a family integrated church and they think, well now I'm here so now I don't need to watch my kids. No, you know what? You came here so you could watch your kids. So watch your kids. And even in a family integrated church, the rule is this. Always watch your kids, period. Always watch your kids. No excuse. Always watch your kids. You say, why? I'm in a family integrated church because look, at the end of the day, this is a church. And there's going to be people that could get crept in unawares and that could be here to try to hurt our kids and we shouldn't be suspecting people. We should love people and welcome people. But at the end of the day, mom, at the end of the day, dad, it's your job to watch your kids. So always watch your kids. Second Peter chapter 2, look at verse 14. Notice what the Bible says about reprobates that creep into churches. Second Peter 2, 14, it says, having eyes full of adultery and that cannot cease from sin. Beguiling unstable souls. I believe that might be a reference to children. In the heart, they have exercised with covetous practices, cursed in children. Look at verse 18. When they speak great swelling words of vanity, they allure through the loss of the flesh through much wantoness those that were clean escaped from them who live in error. And here's the point. In a family integrated does not mean, oh, now I don't need to watch my kids. It means you need to be watching your kids the entire time because you never know when there might be someone who wants to hurt your kids. And I'm not trying to scare you. I'm not trying to make you paranoid. I'm just saying this. Don't come to a family integrated church so you can watch your kids and then not watch your kids. Be thankful that you're in a system where you get to experience church and be in the church service having your kids being watched by you. So make sure you do that. Always watch your kids, period. Always watch your kids, period. It's your responsibility. It's your responsibility to watch your kids. Go to Deuteronomy chapter 6. Deuteronomy chapter 6 in the Old Testament. You have Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy. Deuteronomy chapter 6. Notice what the Bible says. Deuteronomy 6, 6. And these words which I commanded this day shall be in thine heart. Notice what the Bible says to parents. It says, And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children. What are you supposed to teach diligently unto your children? These words which I commanded thee this day. These are the words of God. He's commanding us as parents to teach them diligently unto our children. Notice, and shalt talk of them. Say, when? When should I teach these things to my kids? And shalt talk of them when thou sitest in thine house and when thou walkest by the way and when thou lies down and when thou rises up. He said, when you're sitting at home, when you're sitting at home, take the opportunity to talk with your kids and to teach them about the word of God. When you're walking by the way, when you're driving down the road, you're driving to go grocery shopping, you're driving, you're running errands, you got your kids. Hey, take that opportunity to talk to them about the word of God. When thou lies down, it's bedtime and you're getting ready to go to bed. Take that time to talk to your kids about the word of God. When thou rises up, you're getting up, you're making breakfast, you're having breakfast. Take that time, mom. Take that time, dad, to talk to your kids and teach them about the word of God. I don't know if you're getting the point that he's making, but he's saying this, your job is to be teaching your kids all the time. Bible time is not something that happens on Sunday morning at Verity Baptist Church when Brother Jared gets up. Now, look, you ought to be there, despite his not prophesying, but you know what? You ought to be teaching the Bible to your kids all day long. Training your kids all day long. So here's tip number six. Since we're supposed to be teaching our kids the Bible all day long anyway, use your family Bible time or your home school time at home to train your kids to sit through a church service. Use your family Bible time or home school time at home. You say, my kids won't sit through church. Okay, well, here's the thing. Instead of getting really frustrated in church on Sunday or on Sunday morning or Sunday night or Thursday night, why don't you on Monday night, Mom? Why don't you on Monday night, Dad? On Tuesday morning, Mom? On Tuesday night, Dad? On Wednesday and on Friday and on Saturday? Why don't you have some time where you sit down with your children, you open up a Bible, you read it to them. I was talking about an hour-long sermon. I'm saying read a verse, read a proverb, read a chapter, and you give your kids some biblical truth and try to train your kids to sit there quietly, discipline them at that time and try to train them and help them so that when they come to church, they're trained on how to sit through the church service. Because look, the point of a family-integrated church is for your kids to be sitting in church. Do you understand that? So that when Brother Jared gets up and says, children, obey your parents and the Lord for this is right, he's talking to them sitting in the auditorium. That's the point. So use the Bible time at home. Use the homeschool time at home to train your kids to sit through the church service. Parents must take the time to train their children to sit quietly at home. And the best time to do this is during the family-devotional time during the family-homeschool time. Now let me say this. Go to Proverbs 22. If you open up your Bible just right in the center, you're more than likely to find the book of Psalms. Right after Psalms, you'll find the book of Proverbs. Proverbs 22. Let me say this. You ought to be training your kids at home so that they can sit through a church service. But you know what? Also, you should use the mother-baby room to train your kids to sit in the church service. Do you understand that? That's why we provide a mother-baby room. Why do we provide a mother-baby room? So that you can have a place to take your children that are too young or are not trained in the church service so that you can train them there. Proverbs 22 and verse 6, the Bible says this, train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it. And one of the great burdens I have for parents is this, that I don't think that many parents realize that the whole purpose of parenting is to train. That's what we're doing. We're training. We're training. We're training. We're teaching. We're giving them. We're going to help them. And we get this idea that we've got these kids and we just got to feed them and clothe them and shelter them until they're 18 years old because that's what the law requires or something. And it's like, are you running a prison? That's what the prison thinks. Prison thinks, well, I've got an 18-year sentence and as long as I get them three square meals a day and they've got the right clothing and they got shelter. Look, yes, you need to feed your kids and clothe your kids and shelter your kids. But you know what you need to be doing for those 18, 20, 25 years is training them. Preparing them to be mature Christians that are saved, that are zealous, that love the Lord, that are separated, that are so wonderful. You need to train up your children and one way you're going to do that is by having them in church. People get this idea and say, oh, kids don't understand. They said in church they don't understand. You'd be shocked. They understand. They pick up more than you do most of the time. You'd be shocked at the things. My kids after the service telling me things. My kids telling me things and the sermon, I'm like, what, you got that? You got that? Wow. These deep doctoral things. I have kids in our church walk up to me and say, oh pastor, I realized in the sermon when you said X, Y, and Z and I'm like, go tell your dad. He needs that. Make sure your mom hears that. You'd be shocked how much these kids get. They're like sponges and your job, your job is to get them here. So train them. So parents, utilize the mother-baby room during the church service to train your children to sit still and be quiet. Now let me give you some real specific thoughts on this because I make statements like this and people ask me questions. So let me just give you try to answer some of those questions. And of course, if you have any questions feel free to ask me. Ask my wife. Brother Jared was Heidi. Of course, but let me try to help you with this. These are just general, all right? Obviously, there are certain situations where this may not apply, but in general, you should begin to actively train your two to three-year-olds. You should be training a two and three-year-old to come out of the mother-baby room into the church service. In general, children that are four years old and up should be expected to sit through a church service. All right? They're school age by that time. The public school would expect them to sit in a kindergarten class. They should be able to sit through a church service for an hour. It is appropriate, let me say this, it is appropriate to allow children that are zero to two years old. It is appropriate to allow children that are zero to two years old to play quietly in the mother-baby room, okay? You're not going to get your one-year-old to sit during the church service quietly, okay? Realize that. It's appropriate to be in the mother-baby room and allow your zero to one, zero to two-year-old to play quietly while mom listens to the preaching in the mother-baby room. That's appropriate. But by the time they're two to three years old, you should be working with that two to three-year-old to try to train them to, no, no, it's not playing time. Let's sit quietly and listen to the preaching time and let's try to get them out of the mother-baby room into the auditorium sitting next to dad where they need to be. Children that are two to three years old and up should begin to be trained to sit still and quietly in the mother-baby rooms and just realize this that new families may come with children that are not used to being family integrated and we just need to be patient with them and let them, but this is why we preach sermons like these, right? So they can have a resource to say, okay, well, what do I do now and how do I do it? Look, train your kids at home to sit quietly while mom teaches them the Bible and dad teaches them the Bible and then use them out of the baby room when it's appropriate two to three years old to teach them to sit quietly and bring them out into the auditorium so they can sit with the family and sit in the church service. Number eight, you're there in Proverbs 22. You're there in Proverbs 22.6. Look at Proverbs 22.15. Proverbs 22.15 says this, foolishness is bound in the heart of a child but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him. Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child. So here's tip number eight. Do not allow your children to be a distraction during the church service. Now look, foolishness is bound in the heart of a child. Okay, children are going to be disruptive. They're going to do foolish things. We understand that. We get that. But just because they're going to do foolish things doesn't mean that we should allow them to be a distraction during the church service. And look, all kids are like this. It doesn't matter whose kids they are. Sometimes, you know, I preach sermons like these and then inevitably my kids do some terrible thing, right? They're the ones throwing the football after the service and it's like, good night, you know. And you know, all kids are, it's the Bible says foolishness is bound in the heart of a child. All right? But don't allow your children to be a distraction during the church service. So parents should not attempt to train their children or try to calm down their children while sitting in the auditorium. This is what the mother-baby room and what the mother-baby rooms are for. So use them. Do you understand what I'm saying? If your kids are sitting in the service and they're fine, great. But if they're starting to be a kind of a distraction and I don't know how your kids are but if your kids are anything like my kids, you know, it's kind of a build up, right? You know, you're working with that three-year-old and you're trying to get them to sit quietly and they're singing and you're like, hey, shh, we can't. Brother Jared's preaching. You can't be singing. We got to sit quietly and then their feelings get her, right? And it's kind of like hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm. And it kind of builds up. You know what I'm saying? Ah! Okay, by the time it's up there, ah! Don't sit there. Sh, sh, sh. Okay, you're done. All right? You need to pick that kid up and take him out. Do you understand what I'm saying? Ah! You're going to sit here and listen to the preaching, bless God. We're family integrating children. No, look. Don't let your kids be a distraction during the church service. All right? Wait, if they got out of control, get them in the back. Get them in the mother-baby room. Try to get them calmed down. Because look, that's not fair to the people that are trying to listen to the preaching. You know, parents need to promptly and quickly remove their children from the auditorium as soon as the children begin to be a distraction, to make noise. Please be considerate of others trying to listen in the auditorium. Parents with babies and young children who are likely to go in and out, because look, when you're in that training phase, two to three years old, you might be coming back and forth from the mother-baby room in the auditorium back and forth. Look, if that's going to happen, don't sit on the front row. Sit in the back. You know, sit somewhere where you can come back quickly and not be a distraction. And if you find yourself just going back and forth too many times, you know, then maybe your kid just needs no more training in the mother-baby room. Don't expect a one or two-year-old to sit still and quietly in the auditorium. You know, we want to use common sense, and we have to realize that foolishness is bound in the heart of a child. So look, kids are going to be a distraction. Kids are going to make noise. They're going to cry. They're going to do those things. But we as parents, we should not allow those children to be a distraction during the church service. Go to 1 Corinthians chapter 14. 1 Corinthians chapter 14. And this sermon, you know, tonight is a very instructional sermon. Because this is a young church. This church has been around for two months. And for some of you, this is brand new. This is brand new parenting in a family-integrated church, learning these things. So it's not enough to just say, hey, you need to go to a family-integrated church, which we say, which we believe. But then we want to come alongside and say, and here's how to get the best use out of it. Here's how to make it practical. And here's how to actually work it so that your family actually succeeds in this type of environment. Now, what are some tips? Fathers, set the example. Sit with your family. What are some tips? Husbands, take the baby from time to time and allow your wife to sit through the church service. Ladies, don't use the mother-baby room as a fellowship area during the church service. And let me give you a tip, ladies, in there. Hopefully, they're listening. I tell the people in our church, I always have this vision. And I know it's not the case. But I always have this vision that while I'm preaching, the ladies are in the mother-baby room playing monopoly. I just envision they've got this big board and they're doing the dice and they're not listening. Hopefully, there's not a monopoly board in there right now. But let me help you, ladies, because sometimes you go to a mother-baby room, right? And look, you might do this in Sacramento. You might come to Sacramento and say, oh, pastor's preaching about this here, and then I went to Sacramento. And sometimes you get to those mother-baby rooms and there's that lady who just doesn't care about the preaching, doesn't care about anything and she's just talking and she just wants to talk to you and she just wants to do it. You say, how do I deal with that? Here's how you deal with that. You get to the mother-baby room, you open up your Bible and you just look at the screen. Ephesians chapter 6 and you just, Ephesians 6. And they say something to you. You're like, oh, yeah. You just get back into it. You know, and just, and I'm not saying be rude, but just make it clear like, hey, I want to hear preaching. I came to church to hear preaching. I came to church to despise not prophesying. So ladies, don't use the mother-baby room as a fellowship area during the church service. Number four, keep your kids from running and rough housing before and after the church service. Number five, always watch your kids. Always watch your kids. Always watch your kids. Period. You know, we've got, as this church grows, you'll develop more ministries and have more things. In Sacramento, we've got a homeschool group. We've got field trips and we've got PE class and we've got Spanish class and we've got all those things. And I tell the parents, always watch your kids. Period. All right? Doesn't matter where we're at. Watch your kids. Use your family Bible time or your homeschool time. To train your kids to sit through church service. Use them on the baby rooms to train your kids during the church services. Do not allow your children to be at distraction during the church service. Let me give you tip number nine. Let me read the verse first. First Corinthians 14, look at verse 33. First Corinthians 14, 33. For God is not the author of confusion but a peace as in all churches of the saints. First Corinthians 14, verse 33. For God is not the author of confusion but a peace as in all churches of the saints. Notice verse 40. Let all things be done decently and in order. Let all things be done decently and in order. You say, how does this apply to family integrated church or my family in a family integrated church? Your tip number nine. Pick up your mess before you leave. Now look, you say, pastor, the only way we can get our two-year-old at this point, the only way we can get them to sit through the service is to give them the bulletin and let them rip it apart. You know, that's the only way to get them calmed down or that's the only way to distract them or they take the offering envelope or they take the communication card and they draw and they cut it up and they whatever. Look, if you get a two-year-old that it's playing with a little communication card during the church service, that's great, that's fine. You don't expect a two-year-old to act like a six-year-old, okay? You say, I'm not mad at you if your kid's ripping up the bulletin. But how about this? Why don't you pick up the mess your kid made before you leave? Why don't we allow all things to be done decently in an order? You know, we've got coffee, we've got donuts, we've got fellowship, we've got harvest party, we've got potlucks, we've got this. Hey, I'm all for it. I'm all for that. I'm all for all the food and all the fellowship and let's have the candy and let's have the cotton candy and whatever. But how about hey, let's teach our kids, hey, we had a great time but before we leave, let's pick up our mess. Strain up the chairs. Let's grab all our things, right? Because you're in a family-integrated church. We're going to have kids around us which means we're going to have mess around us and that's fine. Where no oxen are, the crib is clean is what the Bible says. And not around to keep the oxen. But instead of saying, well, we've got oxen, right? We've got the strength and we've got the workforce. We're going to keep them here. We're going to gather soul-winning machine. The Bible says where no oxen or other crib is clean. I'd rather have a dirty auditorium filled with people that are doing the work than to have a prestigious auditorium with no soul-winners and no people doing anything. But you know what? You know what's even better than having an oxen and realizing that where no oxen or other crib is clean. You know what I'd rather do is keep the oxen and clean the crib. Let's just do it both. Let's just be like Paul and labor more abundantly than they are. Let's keep the soul-winning machine tidy and decently and in order. And in a family integrated church, you know what would help immensely if you'd pick up your mess before you left? And I don't know how to say it in a way that doesn't sound rude, but pick up your row before you leave and teach your kids and teach your kids to pick up after them. And here's what I'm telling you, Mom. You will have a mother-in-law who blesses you, you know, later on if you teach your son to pick up his mess after him. If you teach your kids to pick up their mess, so pick up your row before you leave. Pick up your row before you leave. Go to Matthew chapter 19. Matthew chapter 19. Look at verse 13. See, we are blessed to have a family integrated church. And we are blessed that we don't have to be. And look, my wife and I, we grew up in old FB churches. They were Nazis when they came to the nursery and they were like, you must take your kids to the nursery and you must give your children away to something. We're like, we don't know that lady. I don't know who that lady is. I think I saw her on Dateline. Why do I need to leave my kids with her? It's like, good night. And it's like, you must leave your kids. And we refused to, we talked to the pastor and we were respectful about it or whatever. But you know, I mean, and my wife had to be out on the floor and she's still listening to the preaching and whatever. And you know, she was nursing and all those things. We get that. But you know, you're blessed. You don't have to deal with that. You have your kids with you. You have to have this pressure, this constant pressure where they're trying to take away my kids and some youth pastor's trying to take my kids overnight somewhere and I'm not sure where they're going. Look, we're blessed to have that. But realize that with that, with that, we have to learn how to work this because it has to work properly. We need to be able to get the most use out of it. So take these tips and apply them. It'll make your life easier. It'll make your wife's life easier. It'll make your children's life easier. And a family integrated church. Now let me end with tip number 10 and we'll be done. Matthew 19, look at verse 13. Matthew 19, 13, the Bible says this. Then were there brought unto him little children that he should put his hands on them and pray and the disciples. Notice what the disciples did. The disciples rebuked them. They're rebuking people. They're bringing these little children to Jesus and they're rebuking them. Notice how Jesus responds, verse 14. But Jesus said, suffer, the word suffer means allow. He says allow, suffer little children and forbid them not to come unto me. For of such is the kingdom of heaven. Jesus, see you said, Jesus had a family integrated ministry. He said, let the kids come. The disciples were like, no, no, no. They gotta go to the nursery. They gotta go to the children's church. They gotta go somewhere else. And Jesus said, suffer little children to come unto me and forbid them not to come unto me. For of such is the kingdom of heaven. Go to Luke chapter 18. You're there in Matthew. You've got Mark and Luke, Luke chapter 18. And Luke 18, we have a parallel passage. I just want you to notice it's worded a little different. Luke chapter 18 and verse 15, the Bible says this. Luke 18, 15 says this. And they brought unto him also infants. So in Matthew we're told little children and Luke we're told infants. An infant is younger than a toddler. It's a baby that doesn't even walk. They're just crawling. That he would touch them. But when his disciples saw it, they rebuked them. But Jesus called them unto him and said, suffer little children to come unto me and forbid them not. For of such is the kingdom of heaven. And here we have the disciples. They're annoyed by these kids. I'm sure they're crying. I'm sure they're running around. I'm sure they're having all sorts of distractions. And the disciples are like, take these kids out of here. And Jesus says, no, no, no, allow them. Suffer little children. Forbid them not. So here's step number 10. For those of you, maybe you've been sitting here tonight and you've been thinking, man, this sermon is not for me. I don't have any kids. I don't have any family. I'm single. I'm a young person. Or maybe my kids are older and these things don't apply. Here's the tip for you. If you have no children or if you have older children, be patient with those who do. Be patient. Because we're trying to train these kids. So from time to time, these kids are going to cry. From time to time, you're going to have a frustrated mom going back and forth from time to time. And look, if that's not you, if that's not you, then guess what you get to do? You get to sit on the front row. You get to, you know, not have to be in the back and not have to be near with the kids. But when they are a distraction, when they do make a mess, when they do spill the coffee, when they do break something, when they do those things, just be patient. If you're going to be part of a family integrated church and you have no family, be patient. Because we want children to come near Christ and near the Word of God and near the people of God. Jesus had to suffer little children and forbid them not. So don't be like the disciples rebuking them, get this kids out of here. No, you know what, here's a tip for you. If you have no children or if you have grown children, be patient with those who do. Please be patient and gracious. With our young families, because those kids are the future. They are the future of this church. They are the future of Christianity. They are the future of fundamentalism. I believe that the kids in this auditorium tonight will be the future leaders that will turn this world upside down. You say, that's kind of pride filled. Why do you think that? Here's why I think that, because these kids are sitting in a church on a Sunday night listening to adult preaching. They're not sitting in a room somewhere coloring on a piece of paper having somebody tell them a watered down version of Noah's Ark or Jonah and the whale. They're going to be like the Timothy who Paul says that from a young child thou has known the holy scriptures. So be patient with them. Be patient with them. Be patient with mom. Be patient with dad. Because they are raising the future generation. Let's bow our heads and I bow to prayer. How many Father, thank you Lord for your work. Thank you for the Bible. And Lord, I pray that you would help this sermon to be taken in the spirit in which it was given and not as a rebuke but Lord just as instruction. Because in a church like this, in a church like this it's very unique to have this model. We need to be instructed on how to make it work. And there are many people here that maybe have not been part of a family integrated church and they just really don't know how to get the best use out of it. And Lord, I pray that you they would take these tips and maybe there were some that didn't apply to them but they would take whatever would apply to them and that they'd begin to work on it Lord. So that they would not waste their time in church but they get the most out of this church. Lord, I thank you for this church. I thank you for this church. I thank you for the Posnarski Family Lord and the leadership that they've provided here. And Lord, I pray that you would continue to bless and help. I pray that you'd bless their growth not just physically but spiritually. I pray that you'd strengthen them. I pray that you'd help them to be rooted and grounded in Christ. And Lord, we love you for allowing us to be able to serve you and to be a part of a local New Testament church in the matchless name of Christ we pray. Amen.