 Check shit out awesome his next guys also awesome in a massively awesome way enough awesome the same site He's a former attendee of the 21 convention in 2008 Adam Lyons actually they are pointing them out He's like this guy's gonna be friggin awesome And you know what he came back next year and spoke in 2009 in Orlando at 21 convention first convention Yeah, first one talking first my spoke at did a totally awesome job Very popular online awesome guy Keep saying that and now he's here in Stockholm totally badass So second year speaking who would have thought it'd be in Europe Stockholm, Sweden with all these beautiful Svenska flick is but anyway, I'll let you take it away man. Kick some ass. Thank you. Thanks for coming. Appreciate it Yeah, of course Stockholm Sweden fuck I Got to tell you man I've been in this for like four years now running game Coaching for three I never thought I'd go international never thought I'd be here Okay, a little bit about me right who's psych who's this guy standing in front of you talking to you guys, right? I Got into this four years ago at 2006 basically Hit a hardcore and we talked about what I did to get good but a year later I found myself teaching this stuff and Around 2007 I actually got a big break How many people here know about MTV? I was on the show made as a dating coach So that was a big break for me and I got recognized really quickly I started working with PUA training about 2008. I met a great guy named AFC Adam and Just started sealing off man It really did. I was a guy that started doing the boot camps with him I did it when he couldn't come and 2009 a new surprise happened Wasn't expecting it, but I got that's new PUA title. I was actually in Vegas in the time I'm gonna talk about that a little bit later, but when I saw that I'm like really It's it keeps progressing, right? Then two two thousand ten just now I actually got another title. That's natural game and that means a lot to me because I'm gonna talk about my style before and Where I got to now I See some problems in this community see a lot of problems Actually, you know what I want to apologize to you guys I Want to apologize to you guys because if you were like me You came into this community because you wanted to get natural confidence, right? Instead we gave you routines and a lion's eye behind You came into this because You wanted to you know become more social and outgoing instead. We had you sit home Coming up with interactive value displays For getting more IOIs or some shit You wanted more women We gave we gave you more men So for this I am sorry However, there's a you know ray of shining hope out there Because when I got into this there was the wave of the community was basically all these Lines routines very manipulative, you know about four years ago Then we got a new wave and it got into this whole like idea of natural game Even though it was more chaotic and a little bit crazy And then the third wave started coming and that's I think where we are now Where we were kind of like hit reboot, you know me my friend Chris Hart wants to be called now We started joking about this because to us the whole community basically just hit a whole reboot If you notice is we realized we're going down a dark path you realize we were going someplace We didn't want to be and it wasn't working There's a little funny saying here that like 95% of the community doesn't get good So that means basically this guy is gonna get laid like a rock star and fuck the rest of you Yeah, go here Right like is that right Because that was that wasn't my idea when I got into this that wasn't my idea My idea was I come in I Learn the material I read what's out there. I apply it and then I get the fuck out How many people here had been in this longer than six months if you've been here longer than six months and you're still here There was a problem in all of this Unless you're a speaker There's a problem you've been in here for longer than six months as long as you're going out and applying this stuff Why are you still here? How long are you gonna be here a year two years Why are we not why why is this community not progressing getting good? What is going on that's causing all this Again, though, I'm seeing this new wave. I'm seeing it where it's starting to actually happen We got great speakers here, you know gone south here. I've heard him speak. I missed it yesterday But for what I know about him great guy. I see a lot of progression I like this reboot Because now it's not about This whole like oh pick up mentality, you know gotta fuck the chick as much a little bit, you know, it's still there. Let's be honest But We're more emphasizing the idea of being social again. I talked about this last time. I hate the term pick up artist I like to when it first got into it, but then I realized there's so much more than that I want the term social artist This helps in everything If we go the right way, right? So I was talking about this whole six month thing now if I had a student that came to me And after I coached him he did not get good within six months As long as he was practicing and applying what was taught. I feel I let him down as a coach I really would Because there's no reason it took me two years to get to the level. I really wanted to get to About maybe three to get like sick, but two years was I was happy It shouldn't take that long You guys should not be here six months still searching for an answer I guarantee all of you know way too much as it is I guarantee you guys have read a shitload. You know the stuff and you're here trying to get more But you're not going to get it here. You're going to get out there Right So with that I'm going to apologize, but There is some hope there is um There is something we can do for you guys now um I want to start this off by saying When I want to learn game I went two two routes. I went a very structured way Right and then I got this whole natural way And it was pretty cool You know I just got this whole best natural game thing But I actually wanted to integrate the two styles because there's there's goods and bads of both With the structured approach. We have a system of learning. We have an idea of what we're doing Right that what is important However, it kind of messes us up because women don't follow a script. You can't Make how you do things into a science I'm actually working on my phd in psychology right now. I know the psychology of it all And you can't make it into a science What you do can be a science What we're doing will work, but how we do it has to be an art That's why an artist not a scientist Right, so when I have students I quickly learned I have to teach them what to do And what I do and what all my students do and my coaches is the same How we go about doing it is different And and when I real made this realization I came up with something I call the vi system I'm going to explain that a bit But basically the what to do Is a structure it is a science how we go about doing that is the art I want you guys to really Really understand that when I go over the system with you Because it's not meant to be some routine structured type thing. It's meant to be a guide That you can put your own personality into you can put your own self into But you have that structure of what to do by how you do what I want it to be natural Because you know what maybe this guy is a super you know dominant alpha sexual aggressive guy Maybe this guy is the you know really comical and high charisma and high energy Maybe this guy's chilled and laid back, you know, and he just you know push your girl away and makes her keep coming It's all works Right You've seen these kind of guys you've seen these different styles Why do they all work and a bug me because I was looking for that common answer for so long And I realized what they did was the same But how they did it was different and that's the power of this all right So I'm going to ask you this guy's a simple question very simple question Especially for room filled of pick a bar to social artists, whatever What do you guys think at the most fundamental level at its core Causes attraction I'll give you a hint. It's two things that I found At its core not I'm not talking about something like confidence Which is a characteristic that causes it it does But why does confidence ask yourself why why why does confidence cause attraction? Why does humor cause attraction because it does Why does ambition cause attraction? Why does all these things we do? What are the two fundamental things that all boils down to? Anyone want to take a guess Masculinity good good try now Very close You give them good emotions Yeah Expression this is what to but why does expression work? Why does giving them good emotions? Think about that one. Why does giving them? Reward system. So what what reward do they want? Why do they want a reward? What does that mean to them? Okay What the first thing that caused the attraction that we want is value It shouldn't come too much surprise right we got these things called dhv's and Interactive value display all these things we value right it shouldn't come to a surprise Good emotions valuable It's valuable to a girl Now but there's three types of value There's the dhv's where we try to like you know sub communicate this value and we talk about it But the problem is it comes off kind of bragging Very easy to fall in that trap Second form is a little bit more powerful a little bit cooler that's showing value right Imagine if I said hey guess what guys I just want a lottery I got 20 million dollars It's cool. That's me dhv and I got 20 million dollars. What? Now let's say I took it out and I showed you the cash It's like whoa a little bit more cooler right But there's a third one that's even more powerful What if I said you know what I got 20 million dollars and I'm taking all of you guys out to vegas with me and we're going to go party on me Everyone's like fuck. Yeah, all right Right i'm giving value And that's the most powerful form. I want you guys to realize the idea with this and my vi system is giving value I'm going to show you how to do I'm going to structure that for you But what's what's the next thing though? What's something that can trump even value? It relies on everybody can trump it intent close Pre-selection is value Makes you valuable Make the girl what? More what's another word? Chase Investment is what i'm looking for Right because a universal principle in any social interaction that is value for value Anyone you talk to anyone you deal with any interaction you have there's a value exchange going on You're giving some value to them and they're giving some value to you if it's good If there's a break in that the interaction ends for whatever reason So when we get value from someone it's investment So what now when it comes down to my mind is we give value we get investment back Once we give a girl value and then she starts investing in us attraction occurs And these two interplay on each other But don't take my word for it. I want to quote something. I do every boot camp everything I do And that is a quote from the buddha And that is question all that I teach you All right, I want you guys to question me. I want you guys to challenge me on this And not just me everyone anyone you learn from I want you to question it I want you to use your own brains instead of just reading it and applying it because I fell into that trap And the problem is there's conflicting theories. It's confusing How can both guys be right right how many people here probably just the first day I'm going to guess heard two conflicting ideas Anyone Are ready from the speakers? Yeah From the first day we already heard conflicting ideas But I guarantee they're both know what they're talking about. So how does that work? So let's let's so let's prove it. You have to question and see what makes sense for you So let's let me prove this to you guys, right? Let's say I have two lamps This lamp is really bright really big has a pretty design on it. Okay The second lamp that this first one the second lamp is not so bright kind of dull Not so much of a pretty design a little bit smaller. Which one do you guys want? Which one do you guys want? The first one right now. Why? Because that's value We see that I want the first time what the brighter one I want the one that's more valuable But now let's add to the story same two lamps, right? First one bright shiny pretty whatever second one a little bit dull not so bright not so big But the second one you guys spent like six hours in shot class sweating over and making with your own two hands That's your lamp You're only allowed to keep one. Which one do you guys want now? Second what wait a minute, but it's not as bright. It's not as pretty so it's a new things happening here investment We value that which we work for and actually investment will trump value I just proved it to you guys you can see that So what I started doing was you know what? I would battle these guys with all this value They would be there's always going to be a guy that's more shiny than me better looking than me more money than me Some kind of more value than I have but I'm the second little stumpy lamp And I'll get the investment from it And that would beat those guys I actually true story I actually battled for a girl with the owner of the Miami Heat, which is a basketball team In uh in florida and his whole game was name a beatle song. I'm going to give you guys a hundred dollars That's guys be battling with who's like, oh, I know basketball players. I'll hook you guys up, right? Understand this principle. I was able to turn the value against him by getting God investment from the girl. I was able to isolate her away from him But that proved to me. I'm like values not everything That's what that's when I really made that click values not everything, but let's add to the story now I have this new invention all right new story. I have this new invention. It's great great idea I want to sell crap flavored ice cream No, I you laugh, but I swear to god this can sell. I know it can sell right The only problem is any $10,000 to start this business. Who wants to help me out? Who wants to be my investor? Come on. Come on. Who wants to invest and I swear to god if you raise your hand, I will do it Who wants to invest in $10,000 for 10 thousand dollars for crap flavored ice cream? No one Both we can all different types of it. We can see he's a thinker We'll get some corn wands in you know No, but um, basically basically what happens is we don't want to invest anything without the value So yeah investment trumps value, but How can we get investment without the value? And the people who try end up being very manipulative or just creepy You're always trying to get something for nothing right Conardy exactly. I don't want to give that girl that impression. I'm trying to get something for nothing. So these two Interplay with each other very much We can start seeing that All right, so hopefully I've proven to you guys that all of attraction is based on these two things We give value and then we get investment once that occurs attraction takes place And you know what? It doesn't work just for girls and guys. It works the same way with you If a girl gives you value, maybe it's her looks that's valuable Right, you see a hot girl Value what do we start doing? We see the hot girl. We start trying to game them We start going after them all look at that now we're investing and the more we do that the more attractive we become It's the same exact principle. This is a psychology of attraction in place both ways But now we can go on more from here. How does it how do we break this down a little bit further to make this work? I can just be like, uh, give value and get an investment, but how do you go about doing that? Right, what is value in its best form? What is investment in its best form? So let's take a look at this When I started thinking about I started wondering which one of my approaches always went well What was I doing that was making things work with guys and girls? What I came up with was warmth The very beginning of this has to start with warmth Uh, you I think a lot of people can agree that this is a lot like sales, right? You know, we're trying to sell ourselves to a woman almost Show me a salesman. Maybe it's different here in Stockholm But at least America show me a salesman that doesn't come off as the warmest friendly as fuck you've ever met When as soon as you meet them Right, there's a reason they do that Because we value people who come off as friendly warm and who give value That city of warmth friendly being likable giving value We don't want anything returned. Where does that warm friendly guy? When you do that to a girl she's going to reciprocate She's going to accept you in there. Um, when I first started doing this I was doing very like you know active disinterest being very cold being there, you know I'm not into you know being I was cold towards her and then what I was getting was a lot of these ice queens these girls would be cold back I never got it. I was like wise is happening. She was mirroring what I was giving her I was being the ice king. Of course. She's going to be the ice queen You get what you give So I switched up a bit. I started being the warmest friendliest guy first I just smiled my face. I was like, hey, how's it going? You know just Being that warm friendly guy All of a sudden everything started blowing open The guy accepted everyone the guys were loving me the girls were loving me, right It got me in it started. I was giving value to them any way I could I don't want anything from them. They knew it was the the address. This interest was there because I wasn't going in trying to Like merely pick the girl up sometimes it could work and I could explain that but I was basically just come off this likable guy and they were like, okay, cool likable guy. We we'd like him So it started working that way However, the problem is you can't get stuck around here, right? This has to lead to something So it'd be more valuable to actually make the girl Want you you know want your presence not get caught up as like a friend or something And here's the thing the rest of this about this formula and equation i'm going to talk about I said how you know the what to do is a science of how to do is the art is one more thing I want to add to this There's a lot of methods out there or a lot of systems out there that says you do attraction first and then comfort second, right Or you do comfort first and then attraction second I found a real problem with this type of approach Because what happened is the first thing you start doing is what you get labeled as you only make one first impression They immediately classify you immediately put you in a category Now if you're the guy that does attraction first and then comfort second, you're the player Uh, even if you do start doing the comfort stuff afterwards too late, you're the player It's an uphill battle. You got to fight for that now If you do a lot of comfort first and then start doing the attraction, you're a friend You're stuck in that friend zone You can try to attract yourself out and get yourself out of it, but again an uphill battle, right? So now i'm like, well i'm fucked i'm doomed here. What how do I get out of that? What's the solution? And I realize is it's a tightrope act As one doesn't come before the other or if it does it's immediately followed by the next one It's tit for tat You're a little bit of traction then comfort and the traction and the comfort I build it up bit by bit So everything you do don't think of it as this first you got that okay got attracted now this nothing is linear I'm hopefully is going to represent that a bit, right? But I want to show you how this kind of uh How this kind of thing works to keep that principle in mind So what does this lead to? It leads to what I call playful vibing Now i'm sure a lot of people have heard about uh, you know cocky funny and all that right? I like it. I sprinkled in cocky funny. I do a little bit of that The only problem is if it's the bread and butter of what I do I can come off as arrogant You can sometimes come out a little bit uncalibrated, you know the girl rolls her eyes like okay, you know It can be funny. It can't work. It's legit But I just couldn't make my bread and butter what I could do though make my bread and butter is playful vibing That I can do with a girl all day and it perfectly bounces attraction with comfort So let's let's start breaking these down uh bit by bit. So we'll start with playful Most community guys understand the playful stuff most of the like 85 percent of stuff out there is based on how to be playful the role plays the cold reading the future projections Uh the teasing the bantering the um All of it almost pretty much is how to be playful with the girl, right? Now you can use all that stuff. It's great. I do it too. Uh the get I play games with girls. I do all that, you know But the essence is you're supposed to be having fun with it It's supposed to be a game if you're not having fun. You're not playing this game So when I realized is I had to stop being playful for her and be playful for me One for my own sanity and two it actually made my game tighter I wasn't worried about her so much. I was giving her value in a form of fun Um my good friend sin. He uh actually he said this before um the ultimate attraction switch is fun And she's have think about anyone if if anyone you hang out with and you have fun with You're going to gravitate towards that person. It's valuable. Uh what he talked about uh the positive emotions That's what playful should be doing We want to be giving those positive emotions. We want to be having fun with these girls You're allowed to right But the problem is we get a little too caught up in it sometimes Problem is sometimes we get become a little dancing monkey become like oh the class clown. Hey look what I can do puppet acting and shit Not the best right So we have to balance it We have to balance it with vibing Now the funny thing is I talk about vibing everyone's like uh, I want to play full shit. Don't worry about vibing And I'm like well why and I go well, I already know how to do that I know how to vibe come on. I can talk whatever I'm like really Okay How many people here run out of shit to say sometimes and set? I know a lot of guys here can learn some more vibing skills then Because if you know how to vibe properly you never run out of things to say I'm not talking about having uh stock material and stock cans. I'm talking about if you're having interaction with a girl and talking Everything she says should lead to another topic you can talk about I literally never run out of things to say and say anymore or any conversation. I could always keep it going sometimes To my own fault basically, you know But you should never run out of things to say and you should see what topics you can go to I do a lot of exercise in my guys on how to do this properly and how to spot these leads that a girl gives you for example Uh, I'm from Miami, right? I meet a girl. I go I ask a simple vibing question. Where are you from? She says new york Okay What can I talk about now? What are my options? What leads did she give me? I can talk about new york I can talk about what she's doing in miami. I can talk about traveling Travel from new york to miami. I can talk about some new york related topic. Maybe section of city that movie just came out And let's possibly I can talk about chinese food in new york and how that blows away miami's chinese food I can talk about my past visit to new york and my experiences Seeing them where the mafia guy was shot in a little italy All these things I have off and she just said one thing But the leads are endless if you start seeing them and when I realized is at first I could only see maybe one lead Like she'd say new york. I'm like, okay new york. Uh, yeah, new york's a beautiful place, right But as it got better at this I started just endless And then I started being able to bring it to anywhere I wanted to She could say anything and I'd be able to turn the topic into any topic I wanted And that's when I realized there's something going on with this vibrating and there's right way to do it Get out of that interview mode and that style But again, how you want to be playful how you want to vibe totally up to you, right? But how does this look uh kit for tat I was talking about how do we balance this Because again, it's not just do a lot of playfulness and then we have to balance it with a lot of vibing Because too much vibing you're with this boring guy There's no fun. Yeah, it's great because you get on the same wavelength as a girl You show you got a lot of commonalities. These are all very valuable to her you guys can you know connect a little bit But we still need to show we need this to be a tightrope act and it has to be careful So how would it look like this is a more extreme example of tit for tat it's not usually this kind of dry, but Let's say I ask a girl again where she's from, right vibing We'll pick a new place. Um, let's say she's from South Carolina All right And I go now go playful. So I'll say something like I'm from South Carolina. You must have that accent later on you got to see something like I hope something about our I think something about something in my undercarriage Right. I'll make fun of the accent a little bit playful She might laugh a bit and then I go back to vibing go. No, but seriously. I actually heard it's really beautiful I've never been there back to vibing, right She'll say, oh, yeah, it's the best place ever. I'm like easy now. Come on. We know it doesn't beat Miami Let's not lie. Let's not kid ourselves back to playful Again, we can teaser go back and forth. I'm not staying on one too long. I'm not going back to the other So hopefully you guys understand this thing now Look at this If a girl if you've given value to a girl, right, you've improved and by giving value I mean a simple thing because people will ask me what does that mean giving value, right? It means improving her day improving her night Meeting you has had a positive impact on this girl. That is giving value. So I'm giving value I'm coming off very warm and friendly She has a lot of fun with me when she's around And we're on the same wavelength and we connect and we found a lot of commonalities and connections That's all you need for value You don't need the, you know, crazy dhv story where, you know, you're the super pimp guy or something It sounds douchey to be honest I'm sure you guys have said that at least I did where I'm saying I'm kind of winced a little bit. I'm like, that's not me And sometimes a girl won't even like oh like a little smile is like, okay. Yeah, you think you're cool Right, it's douchey So to some level can work again dhvs do work But again, it's the most shallow form of value you can do And it's the most easiest one to backfire on as long as you're just giving her value giving her fun time Having commonalities the girl's gonna like you She's gonna think of you as some valuable guy to want to be around but we're not done here yet All of this has just literally opened the door And this is another big mistake a lot of guys make they open the door for attraction take place And then they do nothing and it closes So do a lot of value shit and they'll open it again It goes ready And they do nothing and the door closes, right At some point we have to get the we open the door for it to potentials there She sees the value she wants it But now we have to get her to come through the door and we do that with the investment So how do we start investment? Oh, actually let me Make it look pretty We do that with qualification Now when I say qualification, I mean two things. I mean emotional investment Where she's sharing her story, you know, she's qualifying herself to us and by qualification It's the act of her trying to prove herself to us Her trying to show what makes her special? Why is she someone I should be interested in? I already have my value I'm the you know value-giving fun guy who's on the same wavelength as her. She sees my potential Now I got to get her to show hers other than her looks So how do I do that? I have to get that qualification. I have to get her proving herself to me In my mind the highest level of game is not when I'm gaming the girl. It's when she's gaming me I don't want to give my DHV stories. I want to hear her crazy stories I want to see what games she knows that she can teach me Often if you qualify the girls right way, they have these funny quirky things they can do I learn a lot about girls. For example, I'll show you one thing I learned a year or two ago How many people here go to a club and have a hard time hearing what the girl says? I have the same issue until I met a girl and she showed me a cool trick If you just push in your ear right here It blocks out the background noise watch push it in And it goes ah How much better can you hear yourself a bit? It's almost like a louder inside your head Ah You'll see go to a club and when your girls talk to you go like this All the white noise goes and you can hear her Sickest thing I've ever seen and I could teach a girl this as a form of giving value Some other shit some girl literally uh Two nights ago show me some hand slap thing where I go like this and she'll show me some fun game of hers That's what I want some British girl That's the kind of stuff I'm looking for right. I want her to show me what makes her cool. What makes her unique. What makes her special Right and has another great benefit, which is I got to see if this is a girl. I actually like if I actually care about Now granted some of us just want to go through a manhore phase and just rack up lays and whatnot It's fair, right. We all go through that phase Um, however, it's still important to do that because she gets to work for you You're going to be the guy that just chills back and she's trying to impress you and get you a bit You've already done the job here. It's her turn to show how she's fun and her ways to show how she can give value in some ways It's fair value for value. It's a law of social interaction Qualification also means something else though that we can get investment for and that is compliance Every time the girl does something for me. Maybe it's just leading away from her friends or isolating Maybe it's bouncing out of the club. Maybe she's having her shit in my lap It could be anything anytime a girl does something for me or complies to a request. She's qualifying herself She's working for me and the more she does it the more attracted she becomes She might not realize it on a conscious level But on a subconscious level you will see it constantly building every time she does something she gets more and more into it She's chasing she works hard for it Basically, I become that little lamp Another big, you know, do she cool guy can come by but she's already into me now. It's done I know her dorky secret. One of my favorite qualifiers is tell me a dorky secret about you I get to see the real her I got to go through that club Programming shit that she adds up that little social mask and plow through that I got to see the real her, right But it's not enough It's not enough Because if she invests in us And we do nothing with with that investment. It's useless. It fizzles I remember I was uh getting a lot of girl to invest and qualify herself and comply and everything And then at the end of it all of a sudden nowhere. She's like anyway, I got to go and she walked away I was like, how did that happen? What this all makes sense, right? I gave the value She did all the work. She was chasing after me. What the hell happened? I was missing that final step emotional connection and sexual escalation How many people here know what operating conditioning is? Any, okay Anyone in this community should know that term. It's a psychological term. Basically it's reward and punishment Operating conditioning. It's it's a behavioral. It's an actual proven psychological technique It's done by behavioral psychologists and what it means is if someone does something we like We reward the good behavior and they do something we don't like we punish the bad behavior. All right So let's say a girl doesn't qualify and we can do this Let's say and this is the whole thing now. Let's say a girl doesn't qualify Let's say she doesn't try to prove her to us, right? We have to punish the bad behavior, unfortunately But then we try to find a smaller way a better way for her to invest again We have to we don't want her to start hating us, you know, we got to do a little bit punishment, but let's try again However, what does she does it? Because if she keeps investing and chasing it so we don't reward it. She's going to be like, why am I doing this? What am I getting out of it now? There's I'm guaranteed been a lot of times Where um, you've been doing all this stuff for the girl, right really trying to get this girl And she's just kind of like just chilling like, you know, I'm not really rewarding at you at all for it And you're like, I guess this girl's just not into me. Fuck her, right and you just move on Same thing happens with the girl. She's doing all this work and you're if you're not rewarding it She figures you're not into her And then she moves on it's This was the final cake I had to figure out I had to realize I had a reward But how do I reward it? What is the proper way to go about creating attraction? I can't just give her a dollar every time she does it Right, I have to do you know have to give her like a legit reward. I can't give her a food pellet That's not going to work either Yeah Here's a cookie So what I came up with was two types of reward systems one is building an emotional connection And one is building sexual escalation And again, if you notice it Basically warmth and comfort attraction Attraction comfort attraction comfort everything's a seesaw The whole thing's a little balance act, right? So how do we reward with emotional connection? Praise? We tell her we like her right Every p-way in the group's like, huh? Can't do that Can't let a girl that know I like her Yes, you can yes. That's why you like the girl You know how many like self-esteems you're like shattering? The girl works for you. She's you're this awesome guy She's trying to get you she probably already has a lot of these female insecurities to begin with And now you can't even let her like know you like her because you have to be cool and hard to get It goes to a certain extent. We got to realize at some point. It's okay to create mutual attraction If you're if you may make out with a girl and you don't think you have mutual attraction She doesn't know it and you still try to play a loop whatever now. You're just a guy that doesn't own up to his uh His masculinity his intention Right a girl will forgive a guy for being a man. She won't forgive him for being a pussy She won't I Lot of people like they see my style and say oh this guy's really indirect He's super indirect guy and it's true I'm very indirect But as soon as a girl goes direct on me or I soon I see that interest from the girl that she wants it I switch hardcore. I'll be as direct as any guy I'll be the first guy to push her against the wall make out with them Or finger him in the club or whatever it is I switch and I switch hard and that's how you guys have to be as well That indirect should only go so far great in the beginning You know friendly warm guy out playing value, you know tell me some stuff about you But as soon as I see that she wants it I give it Right, it's not going to hurt your point. She's expecting it. You know, it's a good thing We want to build that emotional connection. We want to give her praise However, I did come up with another thing at first when I came up with this I actually realized um I actually realized something I first I would reward by telling her some emotional story of mine I would tell her like how I was adopted and how that affected me and seeing um 16 years later the note I got for my birth mother and some some deep stuff right And what I realized is after I told that story I was like Wow, you know and she smiles she goes all you know, she she gave me a praise right and I was like I feel for this girl. This girl's so awesome After I after I shared to be part of myself. I actually felt a strong connection towards that girl And but I realized wait a minute wait a minute. I thought I wanted the other way around Right I was falling for these girls now and I'm like fuck you're like what's going on and it's good It's not bad obviously But again, I'm trying to figure out ways to get her to also, you know come to me So I so I back would rationalize I said if I'm telling these personalized stories to the girl I want to hear her personalized stories again. Just like I came with the realization of I don't want to give my dhv stories of my cool You know all my fun games and stuff I do but I'd rather hear hers I want to hear her stories. I want to hear how she was teased maybe when she was you know in school Because that's what's going to make her really connected me I'm going to see the side of her no one else gets to see and that goes through qualification but also creates that emotional connection This is not about what we can do for her What it is we always want to leave her better way founder But the attraction comes for how much she does for us once we have that value there So a lot of ways I started finding emotional connections. I started creating these gooey moments with a girl Um, I'm going to talk about a real huge realization I had with both of these things But that's emotional connection the other reward is going to be more fun way for some of you guys and that's sexual escalation, right? We need to create sexual tension. We need to create that to happen And basically what we're trying to do is we're building it's a tension release type game We build this tension with sexuality and we release a little bit but then build it right back A little bit more stronger release a little bit, but then we build it back stronger Right and we keep doing it. It's basically mind fucking until it becomes physical We also reward and increments, right? She does something for me. I like. Oh, cool. Okay. Give a little half hug She does something for me. I really like oh, you know, you get a full hug, right? She does something for me I really like now we're kissing Right. It keeps building. It's not but most guys do I see actually could I have someone step up here real quick? Once we come up When I see sexual escalation it actually has to escalate what I see a lot of community guys do Is this kind of thing? I'm like, all right. Sexually escalate All right, cool. Yeah, cool, right? I go, okay fine fair now. All right. Keep sexually escalating All right. Sexually escalate a little bit harder You just keep doing this I don't know. This is not asked. Well, I don't know what this is The finger clips in her elbow or something and you just keep tapping it Thanks Like that's not sexually escalating that that doesn't get us anywhere, right? You actually have to be a man Pull the trigger take a risk Um How many people here think you lose value when you go for the kiss and uh, you know, she gives you the cheek Yeah, everyone's like no now, okay, but I guarantee you a lot of people had their realization or had that mindset I did at least I was scared shitless again for the kiss because I felt if I went for that kiss and I did not get it My value drops. I'm done You know, uh, interesting thing had occurred though. I tried to experiment with this I remember being in a club and I tried dancing with this girl, right and I'm like, fuck I'm just gonna go for the kiss I'm just going for it. It was actually social circle too But um, I went for the kiss and I got the cheek Fuck my value dropped Fucking a better, you know what she's still dancing on me It's still she could leave but she's still dancing on me and I'm like Fuck I'll go again. She's still dancing. So I go for again. I get the cheek But she's still dancing on me So now I'm like, you know what I'm gonna see what happened I'm just gonna keep going for it until she either leaves or it happens, you know So I go for it again. I get the cheek. I go for it again. I get the cheek I go for it a fifth time All of a sudden we started making out and now do we just start making out but on a dance But we made out to the club closed We were just going out on each other for like two hours Her friends were trying to pull her away and she was not budging It was the craziest. I was just like we're just glued together at this point Fast forward two months. I'm dancing with the girl, a new one now, right? I'm like, I'm gonna go for the kiss again. I go for the kiss. I get a cheek And I'm like, well, I know the effective way of going about this, right? I know what could happen if I go five times, but I'm a lazy fuck. I want to I want to get efficient now I don't want to wait till that So what I do instead is when a girl gives you a cheek She also gives you something better her neck So when a girl So when a girl gave me her cheek, I'm like, you know what? I don't really need a kiss I just started kissing her on her neck She's allowed me to do this, right? She already gave it to me. I'm kissing her neck. I'm like, all right I'm making out with her neck basically give give a little hickey or whatnot. What more can I get away with? I mean kiss her yet, but maybe you can get an ass grab out of this start grabbing her ass Well, okay, what more can I get away with this? Well, she had a slit in the back of her skirt So I just put my hand right in there and get it under her dress That's cool. Well, what more can I get away with this? Haven't kissed her yet Haven't kissed her yet But I'm like, do I really want to go back now? I'm going to go forward. I'm going to see what more I can get away with I just want to experiment here. So I go under it now. I'm starting to rubber over panties What more can I get away with? I go through a panty. I'm starting to figure on the dance floor still haven't kissed her yet Finally I stop I look at her. I'm like, maybe can I go for the kiss again? Should I try this? Funny enough, I got it now, right And it happened fast. I didn't have to go through the five You know kiss system. I got efficient at it So this is all about sexually escalating the right way. I wasn't dancing on her and thinking oh, she gave me her neck Maybe I can just do an elbow touch No, I was escalating the whole time Now a cool thing A really cool thing happened with these two things About three, uh, three weeks ago I got to experience the extremes of these back to back Normally, I'm all about balancing it right The idea is you build a strong emotional connection while strongly sexually escalating So she qualifies herself cool, build a little bit of emotional connection She qualifies herself again or complies Now I sexually escalate, next time I emotionally connect Then I sexually escalate, I go back and forth, right So each time she feels better and better and she gets more and more aroused Also, I want to point out we can sexually escalate in two ways All right, there's a lot of people like how the fuck is that possible? I know one way and it's touching them, right? That's one Another one that I really like to do is arousal through words Men are very visual, women are auditorial They love dirty talk If you know how to talk them the right way, it has a powerful effect You have to learn dirty talk, you have to learn how you can get them aroused with your words Because that arousal is what's going to lead them to want to become sexual with you Touching does help, but a lot of times a girl feels that she's giving to the guy Because you're socially conditioned to believe that That when you start getting sexual with a girl, she's giving Instead of getting If you've worn it properly, it should be done as she's getting too But doing dirty talk, it's all for her That will get her really going, especially since she's auditorial Anyways, back to my story Two weeks ago, I experienced a real cool phenomenon On Saturday, I met a girl and she had a boyfriend So I didn't really sexually escalate too much, but she was a really cool girl And I started realizing we started bantering, right? We had nothing in common We actually started off not liking each other I was like, this girl, she doesn't know about She never saw the hangover and knocked up I can't even talk to this girl, right? And she's into weird shit like taking pictures of trash or some shit, right? But... Really, I was just like, okay But she was great at bantering And we just went at each other We were like cats and dogs, just going at each other But it had been a lot of cool flirty tension And then what happened was the next night We started a Skype chat We got our Facebook, we started on Facebook And the hour we started taking by 10 o'clock turned into 11, we turned into 12 Turned into 1, turned into 2 Basically what happened is I did a Skype chat with her Up till from 10 to 6 in the morning 5 or 6 in the morning I haven't done that since like middle school I really haven't, it was the craziest thing And the more we talked in the Skype chat We were doing dumb stuff, I was showing her little baby pictures of me She was showing me, I was showing my little puppy She was showing me this pink flamingo she had Some of her pictures She was showing me how she could do a trick With her tongue, it was just being goofy But the cool thing was I really started caring about this girl I started really making a strong connection Over the Skype chat 6 hours of talking, I mean it was intense for me right The next day I go out And I got to see the other extreme The other flip side of this coin Met her girl, she was a tourist She was visiting from LA And I started sexually escalating on her I'm like, I'm never going to see this girl again I might as well just go for it tonight And I did Now, I live in Fort Lauderdale So that's an hour away from Miami So I couldn't bring her back to my place She was there with her two friends Who were very strict about, you know, they're very good girls Good girls And I couldn't bring her back to that place So I'm like, what do I do? I just started escalating like a madman Found a dark corner with a little bed Because it was like an outside area I just started escalating I just re-framed all resistance, you know I just kept going and going It was basically the height of sexual escalation Right then and there, she was on top of me And we're doing it Back to back I got to see the power of these two together Both were fucking amazing Both, you know, as a man Gave a lot of value to me And the idea that I realized is These are both really powerful I want these to connect I want these to integrate I got to see the extremes of both Now, how cool would it be Of finding that amazing girl That made that strong connection with Who I'm also got extremely sexual with That's the idea of what I want from you guys Because this is the stuff Yeah, it's going to soak your wild oats Yeah, you're going to become a man whore You know, and you're going to get All the women you want Threesome, Samerleys, all that stuff It's going to be great It's fun It also has another thing You're also going to find one day Maybe the mother of your children It does all of it It's up to you guys What you want to make from this The other cool is, again, I'm going to stress this How you go about doing it Totally up to you It is You can be that, you know, dominant guy That you want to be That super sexual, dominant guy You can be the funny, dorky, you know, guy They're a little quirky guy like me You can be, um, James Bond, Debonaire You know, Smooth and whatever You can do however you want I don't want cookie cutter psychs I don't want you doing my style I want you to do your style I want this to be natural That's what I said What me, my coaches and my students do What we do is the same You see it right here How we qualify How we be playful How we sexually escalate And what order and stuff That's up to you guys That's what you want out of this So now, this is all good You know, what to do to, um To get the girl, right But how do we actually improve ourselves To get to that level We could know what to do I mean, this is basically Another confusing theory shit For you guys to be looking over now And I get it Last thing I want to do Is give you guys more confusion in this Because this guy says this And this guy says that I get it, right Problem is I really want you guys to have this out there Use it or not up to you But I want you guys to see another way Another alternative A lot of people get caught up There's only like one or two Real structure stuff out there I want you guys to have An own system you can call your own And you can base your own Individual identity upon That doesn't rely on All these stocked routines And canned stuff Or doesn't rely on chaotic things That make no sense Sure, I feel good But what the hell do I do When that whole fact Was able to integrate both of these, right But now how do we actually get good That's also important How do we learn How to game the right way Well, there's a few things One is practice Everyone talks about that, right But how do we practice Everyone talks about practice, right You know when it comes down It comes down to commitment How committed are you Who are the guys that are going to do this Get a few rejections They screw this and leave Because the guys who are committed Practice is a byproduct of commitment Right, I had blind faith in this It was either this worked Or I was doomed I couldn't stop Because stopping would be going back to a life That I didn't want to live Again, I just had blind faith And I got that commitment from that I had to keep going That's what's going to get you out practicing You can say pride, but what does that mean I went on to one side, I practiced Maybe that is what it means to you Maybe that is your commitment level But again, it's not pride That's going to get it I mean it is, but what it's going to get it Is your commitment to this To this lifestyle To improving yourself To helping yourself You know what The whole idea of this is to You know, give value and get investment There's one thing I'll always invest in That's myself That's my own game If you're going to invest in anything Invest in yourself, right? Makes sense But there's other ways we can get good While we're practicing While we're being committed One thing I hinted on earlier Now I was asking why What? Evaluate Yeah, think Again, question all that I teach you Evaluate, right? Don't just take this from my word I don't want you to be like Okay, this should work, right? He said it works, it works Question it Evaluate it Think about it Think about it logically And you know what? Evaluate it Experiment with it If I'm wrong, please tell me Because I've yet to see it But no, but again, I could be The only way you can find truth in anything Is to constantly test it with time Again and again and again I want this tested 20 years from now If it's still out I do Because every time it's tested And it proves it, it proves it tests It becomes more true And until it's tested It's not really that true So I'm urging you guys I want you to do this I want you to challenge me in this The other way of getting good Now this was a big one This is what actually I feel Got me real quick Because I had this mentality Somewhere within the first month I adopted this mentality And that got me quicker than most of the guys I was winging with at the time In my own local area And that is I always led the set I was always leading it someplace And in my head That's what's really separate That's the only, that's the one real thing I think that separates an intermediate guy From an advanced guy An advanced guy is always figuring out Where to take it Where, how do I lead it What do I go with this I'm not getting that two hour set That goes to nowhere I'm leading it somewhere The intermediate guy is like I got all this cool stuff to do But I don't know where I'm going with it But hopefully something happens No, it's your job Someone said masculinity, right Your job to lead the fucking set Your job as a man To make it happen She's not going to do it for you So how do we know where to lead it to How do we know where to go The idea of mini goals Just create mini goals for yourself First we open And maybe we transition Right Then you know Eventually we isolate someplace Eventually we need to balance her out Whatever I made a list Of what my mini goals were And I kept adding to it And the more mini goals I added The smoother my game became Because it wasn't this big jump to something That I'm trying to do It was now, oh this mini thing You know instead of isolating her What if I just mini isolate her Then get visual isolation Then I totally isolate her It became much smoother But I had all these mini goals I kept doing Alright I want to talk to you guys about some stuff I have to wrap this up But one thing I do want to talk to you guys about Is this new project I'm doing Called Girl Attract You can find it at girlattract.com And what I'm doing for you guys Is creating a lot of videos On all different how to's Because again I teach you a lot of what to do But it is good to have some how to's Have some ideas Right And this covers everything from You know day game to I had to isolate properly To what to do when you're having a movie night And you're sitting here And a girl is sitting there I was in that situation I had big space to do Right So I come up with all these scenarios And I'm always asking for questions And what's the next thing Little segments right And I throw these videos out And you can find them at girlattract.com And you can see this And the greatest thing is It's only $20 a month And if you actually say You're part of the 21 convention And people watching this at home The first month is on me I'm that confident I want you guys to see it You sign in I will reimburse you for that first month If you like it Cool, stay on If not Don't even worry about it No hard feelings Alright And each month I'm going to upload new videos However The real thing that got me good Was in You know Getting a bunch of products And it was actually getting mentored It's actually getting taught Having a guy who's more advanced than me Watch me work And You know Start critiquing Because there's going to be stuff in your game That you cannot see for yourself You can't But when someone else sees it Someone's watching you And again Not like you and your buddy That's like the blindly and the blind A guy who knows what he's doing Mentor And when I got mentored That That pushed my game hard That's what's going to do it So I want to tell you some stuff I have going on And hopefully You know you like it But before I do I want to ask you guys a simple question How many people here Really are that committed To improving their lives How many people I mean it How many people really want to get this thing handled Okay That's good I want you guys to commit it And hopefully that commitment shows me You are practicing and going out there So one thing I want to talk about Is Something coming up in Las Vegas I got a workshop going on Now if you don't know about what Las Vegas is You know It's a different country It is basically like the same Same nightly capital of the world There's a famous model there What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas I have seen the craziest shit known to man That happened in this city Alright It's like meant for it It's a place where An AFC will go to To become a god So to speak right It is the craziest nights It's meant for that It's specifically designed So that crazy shit occurs in Vegas The gambling The lights The free alcohol in most places Like it's nuts And I started finding a really cool thing to happen When I was doing these workshops there I would do these You know week long programs And the students of mine would be Like getting threesomes Like multiple same night lays And like I proud myself In getting some good results from my guys But this was like out of unreal I mean it was a fucking Goal mind In doing this place And if you really want to understand it I would suggest How many people here watch the Hangover? Yeah That basically is Vegas The next time I go there I kind of want to steal a tiger But what's going on there now Is we're doing two things One is a seven day program Alright You come into Vegas You go to a hotel with us And basically You got seven days to do this So the first program Seven days And what this includes Is a two to one ratio of instructor Which means it's you Your wing An instructor I used to work with companies That were about like You know Four to one ratio I mean five to one ratio And I'd be doing it And I'd have these four guys And I'd be like I'd be watching two over there Like one guy's behind me Doing something And another guy's like running around somewhere And I didn't know what the hell I was doing I'd be fucking like Sonic or something Running around this place Right So I realized that doesn't work You can't do the And when you do these programs To ask about this Four to one ratio does not work It's a two to one ratio At all times Right I also have another program For you guys And this is what I'm really excited about This is the first time I'm doing it And I came to tell you How ants I am for this The other thing I'm doing The ten day apprenticeship program Now the ten day apprentice program What is this? What is this entail, right? The first thing Intense personal coaching You're going to come out For this seven day thing You get the two to one ratio But the last three days It's one on one with me guys We're with each individual one of you And it's non-stop It's pretty much almost like sleep deprivation You're going to be out gaming We're going to be pushing you guys Inset again and again You're going to be Learning this stuff inside and out In Vegas with us The second thing we're going to be doing If that's not enough is We're going to add a little technology to it I'm going to be miking all of you guys up So that way when you go and set Just like I'm a little bit miked up I'm going to be hearing everything you say I'm not going to be just watching you over there I'm not going to be the creepy guy Trying to stand like this Listening I'm going to be the guy All the way in the corner Just watching you and hearing Every single thing you and the girl says We got the technology We're dealing coaching to a whole new level At this point The other cool thing is A lot of times I'll watch a guy and set He'll come back to me And then I spend like 10 minutes Where he's breaking down what happened I don't need that anymore I know what happened I heard it I just tell you what to do Tell you what I heard Tell you the fixes I see Go to the next one Come back This is what happened Go to the next one You don't need to say a word You just listen Go to the next one I got you miked up And that includes even the 7A program But there's a special thing I'm doing For the 10 day guys For video taping your asses You're gonna get the hidden camera in field Alright And this way You're gonna get to see yourself At the end of all of it And I'm gonna break down exactly And be like see how you did that You see You don't have to remember it I have it on tape Look at the reaction Watch You can start critiquing yourselves now And I'm gonna be going Through all these tapes with you At the end of the night So while the 7 day guys Go to sleep Not your asses The 10 day guys We're staying up And doing a debrief But it actually doesn't end there Whoever does this It's apprenticeship program It's not 10 days I get about one year Of free bootcamps after that For entire year Every bootcamp I do I want you there Come on Keep learning You're gonna shadow me And learn it with this stuff Because you want to know The real reason why I'm doing this Is call an apprentice for a reason I'm looking for my new instructors Especially here I'm looking for my European team I'm looking for the guys That really are committed That want to actually Maybe do this for a living That want to travel around You know, make money Doing what they love to do But I would need to see you guys Who progress very well Who have the time And the patience to learn this skill And who has the ability To actually coach And that's what I'm gonna be teaching you Another thing How to coach yourself And the students I gotta find my guys I want Europe I want it bad So I need that Europe team Right So now I want to ask you a question Now again, this kind of thing is You know, it's gonna be a little pricey, right? How much do you think these guys would cost? I want a random guess If you saw this online How much do you think this would cost? $1,200 $1,200? Which program? Well, no, just this Right, 10 day apprentice thing The personal coaching Getting mic'd up Getting videotaped And debriefing And one year free boot camps $10,000 About $10,000? Yeah, it should be more $10,000 More than $10,000? $12,000 I mean, most boot camps are like $3,000, right? $12,000 $12,000 What have I said for you guys? I'd be doing it for $2,000 And change $2,100 I want it affordable for you guys I don't want to be the one who's like Daniel is an angry carrot over your head And you'd be like, ah, you can't have it Give me $10,000 Give me $12,000 for it I don't know about you, but When I was first learning about this I didn't have $10,000 or $12,000 to shell out I wanted this fucking bed But the problem is, I had this little thing called Actually having to live I had to pay rent I had to buy food, right? I don't want to be that guy that's going to bankrupt you Also, the 7-day one? $997 The thing is though It is going up though If anyone wants to sign up If anyone really Again, I want to ask again How many people here really are that committed? And whoever's raising their hand Whoever's really that committed I want to talk to you I want to see you guys after this Because those prices are going to be lasting Until the end of lunch basically We got about like 15 minutes After that it goes up to about 2,997 But I do want to see those committed guys I want a Europe team I want to make this affordable Alright Now the last thing I want to say is I do want to talk to whoever wants to come to lunch Whoever wants to learn more about this Ask questions and you know See how bad you guys want this Come out to lunch with me, okay? We can just talk about it And lunch is where? Indian Place Downstairs I'm going to be eating there You can pick my brain You can talk game You can talk about the program All of it, right? I want to see that guy that's committed Again though, if you'd not I want to stress this out though I don't care about the money so much It's already cheaper than a bootcamp I know a bootcamp is three grand This is already cheaper than that It's not about the money What I do want to see Is a guy who really is committed A guy who really wants to do this Who can see himself doing this I want to see a guy that will do What it takes to get where he needs to be And you're going to come in You're just going to be like You know, I'll read it and then I'll just go back to the computer And type some stuff up and go in form No, tell you right now I don't want you But if you can see yourself doing this Yes, please talk to me, okay? The other thing is Something just for you guys Everyone here If you want to do this or not Tonight I'm doing a free In-field two-hour session with everyone Come out with me I will personally get each one of you Do a set or two I will critique what I see For free Alright, that is my gift to you guys You don't need to do this Just come out I will plan it out Maybe over lunch I'll tell you where I'm going to be And we'll figure something out, alright? With that said I'm done letting you know All about this, whatever If you have any questions I'm here, what do you guys got? Yes You have a program, game, anything? Actually, with the early part of your speech You were talking about vibing back then You were talking about where you're from Or from New York, how about the cars in New York Something like that, whatever First of all, props to that Because I've heard it a lot more And it really works My question though was How did you become good at vibing Because, well, it became better But not the next level, so to speak Basically the way, again The question for everyone is How do you get good at vibing? How did that happen? I'll tell you how it didn't happen It didn't happen by having a pre-programmed response Everything a girl says Or forcing a routine to fit a situation What happened was I had to gain social intelligence I had to have a system of How I could just talk to a girl And be normal, alright? So I had had these conversations Where I kind of went to nowhere A little bit sometimes And then I had to have other conversations That started kind of going well I started breaking down Why did this kind of crumble? Why did this not go well? Why did this go well? A few things One is I didn't do interview stuff anymore I was actually making statements And relating stuff to my own life I was finding, I was looking for commonalities With a girl instead of just Talking about whatever, you know Oh, yeah, I liked that too No, I didn't like that No, she's talking about it I looked for the stuff I did I looked for the stuff I can actually talk And relate to her on, right? A lot of times you try to be fake when we vibe You know, the girl says I like horses Oh, I like horses too Horses are good No, I don't care about horses I'll say cool Well, what else do you like? Knowledge, cool She likes horses Well, what else, right? Make some statements with it Again, but really the way I've done it Was it just being normal Just hanging out with a bunch of women You know what really helped me with vibing actually? It was a strong one I encourage all of you guys to have it How many people here have at least Five close female friends That you can bring out any time And they'll come out with you And party with you A lot of hands just went down for a minute Like, mm, all right For those who do kudos For those who don't The idea of this is to have women in your life You know, maybe she's a friend But I guarantee that female friend Has other female friends That you can now get with Normal guys Don't really do court approach too much Yes, real quick though But when it comes to vibing Just hanging out with women Without the intention of picking them up Just chilling with them Seeing what they talk about Seeing what they talk about with each other You learn how to talk with them You learn how to vibe naturally But yes Yeah, you know The thing with the close friend thing That they have other friends That you can make up with But you know, I find that To be a rather, you know Difficult situation with Because, you know, when you're close friends With a girl Yeah, that's a friendship You don't break I mean, if you're really, really close And it's not really The same with her friends But it's sort of like Intervened, you know You can't, you see what I mean? It's like, yeah So basically a fucking paraphrase You become friends with a girl And once you become friends with her You're kind of becoming friends with her friends Yeah, that's the thing That's the thing, right? Here's the difference Between what's going on here When I become friends with a girl I'm not in her friend's zone She's in my friend's zone There's a big, powerful difference Between the two I literally have girls Who I take out to lunch And you're saying Why aren't you interested in me? Why don't you want me? And I go, because we're friends You're a nice girl You should be like But all the guys want me Why don't you want me? And I'm like, because you're my friend The same shit to them That they do to us If it were for us Why wouldn't it work for them, right? Another difference Most people are female friends They call them friends But they're not friends They're orbiters They do shit for their girls They hack around They hold their girls' purse and stuff They're like, oh, but she's my friend No My friend outspank money ass I'll hug him With one friend I'm the official boob checker I don't even know how I got that job But it's awesome She'll be changing Trying dresses I should be like, is the cleavage good? Can you feel them? Or is it good? I'm like, yeah, no, it's fine It's nice boobs, yeah, it works That dress is better I like the cleavage, push it again I always have that little bit of sexual undertone With my friends Not all Some of them Very much like my sisters But a lot of them I'm always playful I'm always flirting But we're just friends Yeah, I'm checking your boobs out And playing around with it But we're friends Yeah, I'm spanking your ass You're giving me a lap dance Maybe we make out once or twice But we're friends It's a big, powerful difference Of how we go about making these friends And once it goes in your friend's zone You can always bring her out of that I'm not talking about being an orbiter here, okay? So if you're experiencing that When you meet her friends Floor it with the friends, it's okay Sometimes we're too worried about Oh, it's social circle I gotta be very careful And I fell into that trap Yeah, it's a really big trap It's important I gotta be very careful You know, it's her friend I can't flirt No, we can flirt We just can't do it The code approach style of Picking her up And doing all this crazy shit No, granted But we can still flirt We can still build a little bit of tension We can still give her a little Cocky smile every now and then You know, it's okay It's expected We're a guy, they're a girl It's understood You're not gonna ruin friendships By flirting, okay? It's harmless, it's cool It's fine You can still be warm to a friend And then you can still be playful and vibe You can be playful in a little bit of sexual ways You can vibe about sexual topics You can qualify on sexual topics You can escalate, you know, slowly But surely, it does work It's a social circle game It's the same thing as code approach Except it's a little bit slower And you gotta be a little bit more aware Of the rules of it But sometimes we get too extreme And we think there's too many rules We can't break, not the case They will let things slip Because again, you're the guy She's a girl, it's understood All right, there's a question What are your end goals with those girls? Just a friendship relationship Your hands Some girls, I really like Honestly, I call them my sisters If anyone looks at my Facebook You're gonna see a list of five or seven girls And they're a list of my sisters Not really my sisters But they're my sisters, right? I'm not touching those girls They're my sisters I look at them They're all hot They're all fun They all come out with me and party with me They give me pre-selection They will be my wing girls They'll introduce me to other girls I'll get with their friends But those are my sisters Some girls I get very sexual authority with And we have that sexual undertone And sometimes we hook up now and then Sometimes then we go back to friends All other girls, they turn into friends with benefits Right? You can make it what you want You can structure it to be whatever you want Depending on the type of girl Her personality What I feel for her Is what I'm gonna make it But something sounds like The gay referendum, you know? If all I'm doing is being the friendly warm It's a small line You're in the... The small line gets broken by these things Being playful and having fun with sexual topics Qualifying her and getting her to do shit for me Instead of me doing stuff for her The friend zone, nice guy, whatever Does shit for the girl, right? You want to get attraction Make sure she's also doing shit for you She's qualifying She's trying to prove herself to me And work for me So you're like the gay friend but you're not gay Because... Yeah That relationship is almost the same Because the gay guy Oh, it does the stuff He checks her boobs Spank her in the ass I know the dance, lap dance But it's understood though They know it can go hardcore at any kind of point It's not like Oh, I'm just putting your ass behind No, it's innocent No, it's like... Believe me, they will I know some guys and they... You're not fucking gay They know what's up They see me in action They know what's going on It's that underlying sexual tension That's the best way I can put it The gay guy, their gay friend so to speak It's just Oh, I'm one of the girls Right? I can mentally relate to be one of the girls I can talk to them about boys and whatnot But there's always that underlying tension That always simmering heat That can explode at any moment And the other thing is I don't just stick around I shape it as I go I don't get stuck in one Unless I want to be And that's fair You can have girls you're just friends with Like my sisters Other ones though You progress quickly You do sexually escalate on You do make your intentions clear Right? For example, I go ahead and menu lay with I guarantee I didn't go in the friend zone with her Right? You structure it how you want it to be And you have that choice Depending on how much emotional connection How much you sexually escalate It's all tit for tat How you play with it But again, having a social circle of women around you Extremely important We've gotten this to have women in our life Not men Maybe when you start But fair though When I did start off I didn't kind of solve it You know I was kind of like the gay friends I was just making these friends And you have to learn how to do it properly You have to learn how to take risks And what the right risks are And you have to be willing to lose some friends In a process to know where those boundaries are It's a learning process Just like code approach It's the same thing You win something you lose something Alright, to answer your question? Yes Alright Anything? Yes? Any other questions? You know everybody keeps Going back to the same term You know, sexual tension And finding it difficult To put words to it Like would you try to define it Especially the tension part What's going on there? Defining sexual tension It's when you know Something's about to happen sexually But it's not happening yet But you know it's coming Alright When you know You're about to kiss this girl And you feel that Oh you know it's about to happen Our face you're getting a little bit too close Something's about to happen It builds that tension It's that foresight Of something sexual occurring So it's the expectation Expectation They expect it They don't know for sure And it kind of creates the tension But they're expecting it right It's a little bit more certain And things are happening a little bit More than just friendly right Being a little bit too close You're talking about sexual topic a little much You know there's some teasing going on a bit And it starts creating that sexual tension The idea is you create a little bit of it And then you release it And then you create it a little bit stronger Then you release it And create a little bit stronger And it stacks Until the release is sex The ultimate release So it's kind of the ambiguity And the mystery You know You're not quite sure what to make of it You have a certain expectation But it's not Don't think of it as ambiguity Because then you're playing this whole style of game of Am I really that into you Maybe I am But no I'm not really No it's like We're both into each other We both know what's about to happen The effect and see When? I'll tell you when Right That's a difference She knows it's going to happen She doesn't know when That's my choice Right That's going to build the tension in her That's what's going to get her Her juices flowing Alright So I have time for one last question One more Alright one more question Who's going to be You all good Everybody knows everything here Okay Cool questions By the way from everyone else I wanted to expand a little bit more in the vibe Save the situation And because this happens to me sometimes I'm talking for like Let's say 15 to 20 minutes And I'm not really thinking about what I'm saying Just doing or being Whatever But suddenly my mind Drops blank And I do not know what to say So it's not in the cold approach Well I don't know what to say as well But I just keep my mouth open It's a common problem Again that idea We write out things to say And that is a vibing issue Answering I mean I literally go an hour or two On how to buy a property I do games to play I show them the exact structure of vibing It's a little bit You're asking a question that takes a long Much longer answer than what I have time Right now It does come in practice What I would say though is There are structures to it And I teach you exactly how to do it the right way But short answer Get out of your own head Right Stop trying to be the guy That's always trying to find the perfect thing to say Because what happens is we get anxious She said What do I say now What do I say now I got to do something right And you're immediately in the wrong frame As soon as that happens If I catch myself in that frame I'm immediately corrected Because you're in the wrong frame Now you're trying to impress her Now you're trying to do something for her Now you're the guy investing Right It's the worst frame It's hard but whatever you want to talk about You know what Worst case scenario Let's say you blank out Say whatever the fuck's on your mind I don't even know what to say anymore I'm probably blanked out I had that And then I blanked out again You know what Okay then you know what Okay cool fine this guy blanks out right How about if I show you Okay I bet you feel awkward too didn't you I bet you're like Fuck how do I keep this going Like this girl's Oh my god I'm rooting with this girl right You blanked out I don't know what to say Okay cool Let's take this guy What if I showed you a way Where you can flip that And put it on her Where she feels what you were feeling And you're just sitting back smiling That would be cool That'd be cool Alright Let's learn how to do that right Very simple You know I've been talking a lot of this time I don't know what to say Tell me some stuff about you Then just shut the fuck up Right So you go what do you want to know I don't know What do you want to tell me Shut the fuck up Alright Cause now guess what All that social pressure is on you Now she's the one feeling socially awkward And she wants to fix it Well I don't know I like to dance Oh cool You want more What about dancing Well I don't know like Salsa and tango and what not Cool yeah what else Shut the fuck up Alright Again this idea of I'm not trying to impress your girl It's not me Trying to work my ass off for her Like I do want to give value Granted But How about instead of me Feeling socially awkward How about she feels That she's losing it How about you We get that old mentality Of you're the prize Why are you the one Worrying about losing this girl How about we get her Worrying about losing you Now granted We don't want this girl Feeling awkward around you 24-7 here I mean let's be honest But a little bit's not bad And when she does Find some stuff Oh look at that Qualification guess what We can do now All new types of talks All new types of topics to talk about And based on what she says We can then respond With our own ways of doing it However if any time a girl Makes it feel socially awkward for me I can bring her right back And make it socially awkward for her But I just shut the fuck up We don't need to be the black man We don't need to keep talking We don't need to be the guy That's constantly entertaining the girl Right It's 50-50 It takes two people to have a conversation Unless I'm doing a speech But it takes two people To have a conversation Why is all the weight on you And she's not adding Living up to it Just get her to add up to it I'm psych guys Thank you for your time Oh And one more thing One more thing For those that are interested I have my own blog out right now It is psychofgame.com P-s-y-c-h-o-f-g-a-m-e.com And you can contact me At psych at psychofgame.com I urge you guys To go check it out A lot of free articles Sexual escalation How to transform What? 21 convention video My spot on MTV All different videos on there There's all kinds of stuff For you guys to check out The different programs that run Ways to contact me Everything Especially on this trip I'm gonna start updating it I got a lot of stuff I'm gonna be updating it Really frequently So start watching it In the next week or two Because I've got More than enough shit In my head to put on That thing right now All right Check it out Hope you like it I'm site again Thank you guys Glad you're here Yes