 Holding hands in public and showing affection to the outside world doesn't mean the relationship would last forever. If it were the case, then celebrities would have the strongest and longest relationships when it comes to building a lasting relationship. And the visual's behavior play a huge role. They can either make or mark your relationship. In this video, I will share with you 12 behaviors that destroy relationships. 1. Silent Treatment Have you ever been in or seen a situation where someone offends their partner and the partner resolves to keep malice with them for a while? This is not me being biased, but this silent treatment behavior is most common among the female folks. When some people get upset by their partner, they tend to ignore them to show how pissed off they are. They assume that the silent treatment is a payback for whatever pain their partner must have caused them. The offender may try all his best to resolve issues, but in the long run, this attitude is not healthy. At some point, your spouse might get tired and decide to call the relationship quits. It's a better idea to let your emotions out even if it might start a fight. 2. Avoid Uncomfortable Moments No one wants to fight all the time, but what's even unhealthier for a relationship is letting little wrongs build up without expressing them. Say for instance, your partner does something that hurts your feelings, but you don't want to ruin your outing together by bringing it up. Do it anyway, if not at the moment. Talk about it later on. You may experience a short period of discomfort as a result of venting your pains, but that sure beats an extended period of low-grade resentment that comes at bubbling up your true feelings and acting like all as well. Besides, how you approach the issue can make all the difference. Saying when you do this, it makes me feel like this, in a serious, yet polite manner, is better than avoiding the talk. 3. Expecting That Your Partner Knows What Goes Through Your Mind Another attitude that breaks your relationship is feeling that your partner knows how you feel. You know all about that couple that claim they can finish each other's sentences. They're always so in sync. Well, that is cute and do happen. But not all the time. In real life, you can't expect your partner to always know what you're thinking or what you need without ever vocalizing things. Addressing these issues on the insider, psychologist Lauren Gentile PhD said, People are often afraid to ask for what they need in a specific situation. They come to their partner looking for something specific and then get frustrated when that is not what they get from them. Gentile further explained that such expectations are an open door for chaos because if you don't tell them what you want or need, not only do they not necessarily know what it is that you want or need, but you take away an opportunity to let them give it to you. You're on the same team when you're in a relationship, but your spouse can't help if you expect them to always know what you want and what to do. Four, getting distracted when you are together. Rebecca Montgomery PhD once asserted that quality time is in quality time if you're not connecting. Research has shown that recent generations are having less sex than past generations when they were the same age. Technology is a big part of this gap. In today's world, it can be challenging to put down the phone, shut off the computer, or even give the TV a night off, especially if those things are part of our daily habits. But taking time away from distractions to spend time with your partner will strengthen your relationship. Five, insecurity. Though it can be challenging, especially if your spouse is attractive to set aside your insecurities, letting your insecurities temper with your relationship can make things go bizarre for you and your partner. Although there are cases where insecurity is as a result of the partner's behavior and other times, it is just as a result of low self-esteem or fear of the unknown. For example, if someone has a negative belief of, I can't trust anyone, probably stemming from their trauma, they then will begin accusing their spouse of lying, infidelity, etc. This can create a lot of stress in the relationship, which is hard for any relationship to withstand long-term. Six, always being defensive. Generally, as humans, whenever we perceive that someone is attacking us, we take a defensive stand. However, defensiveness in a relationship can escalate a mundane conversation into a fight quickly. Usually, there are two significant reasons why a person puts up the defensive mechanism. When they are actually being criticized or wrongly accused, or when they don't want to take responsibility for their mistakes. We all make mistakes in relationships. The key is never making hasty conclusions and communicating your partner's flaws in a friendly way and also taking responsibility by owning up to your faults when you're wrong. Seven, acting like you are single. Even though research shows that codependence in a relationship can cause it to crash, it is essential to remember that a loving relationship is defined by two people who love, support and interact positively with one another. Hence, maintaining balance is paramount. And while you should avoid the pitfalls of a codependent relationship, you must also be mindful not to behave as though you are single and send wrong signals to your spouse and other people. When you act like you are single without an agreement between you and your partner, you behave in a way that marginalizes them and disrespects their feelings for you. Even as you have fun separately, always bear in mind that you are part of a loving union and willing to compromise on your single lifestyle using the traits that attracted you to your partner in the first place as motivation. Eight, dishonesty. It has been discovered that we all lie at one point in time or another, either to create a false belief or escape the consequences of a wrong action. In most instances, there are small insignificant fabrications. Still, it is essential to remember that telling a lie, no matter how minute, is a compulsive act that can quickly escalate and cause massive damage to a relationship. Just one lie can become a series of small related lies that gradually begin to create mistrust, which eventually destroys the fabric of any relationship. Trusting in the bond you share with your partner and being honest no matter the situation, although scary, keeps the relationship together. A loved one is far more likely to forgive transgressions if you are courageous and honest with them than if they discover that you told a lie. If you are incapable of honesty, then you are not ready to be in a lasting relationship. Nine, overstepping boundaries. Just because you're in a relationship does not mean you can overstep your partner's boundaries. Yes, you both are in a relationship, but still, you both have certain limits. At times, your partner needs their privacy and so do you. For instance, if you know that your partner does not allow visitors into your home when it's past 9 p.m., don't deliberately come around by 10 p.m. Respect their space. The behavior of overstepping your partner's boundaries can ruin your relationship. Know when to step back and give them a space to breathe in. 10, in gratitude. Many a times, in shaky relationships, you may hear one partner calling the other an ingrate or saying, after all I have done for you. Yes, it is not right to do things for people just because you expect them to say thank you or reciprocate. We do it because we love them, but it is only reasonable to show some form of gratitude to a helpful partner. Two people need to support each other and encourage each other. Relationships will always tumble down if you start taking your partner for granted. Acknowledge it when your partner prepares a nice meal or takes you out. Don't feel entitled. Gratitude keeps a relationship healthy even if there is distress in life. While in gratitude, an entitlement mindset destroys the relationship. Being competitive. It is one thing to challenge your partner, but another to always compete with them. You could become passive aggressive if you both are always trying to get to a higher level than each other. Being challenged has to do with motivation, whereas being competitive may go as far as wishing that the other person fails so that you can prove a point. When you compete with your partner, insecurities about yourself could set in. Anger and even hate begins to stem. At some point, instead of you to be happy, you may start feeling vexed whenever your partner wins. Now, this isn't a positive element of a relationship. 12. Always trying to make your partner jealous. Relationships are already tough. There will always be a pain to be felt, so there's no need for you to make an effort to bring it about. It might seem like fun to you, but it isn't healthy to make your partner insecure deliberately. It might get the desired reaction from your partner, but it is a wrong way to know how your partner fails. Your manipulative behavior may begin to lead to anger, fear, violent and even insecurity and other negative emotions. Yes, jealousy can make you feel extra wanted, but in the long run, it always backfires. Being in love is easy, but keeping a relationship is quite tricky. It takes more than the passion for building a long lasting relationship. Both individuals must be willing to let go of some of their habits to stand as a threat to the relationship.