 For fast, cheap, and reliable Madden 22 coins, make sure to go to instantmaddencoins.com Use code MMG for 10% off. Well, one of you, please, please, please! Read this at my funeral. Obviously, I'm going out swinging one day, right? All the boys are invited. I need one of you brave souls to stand up and read this. I was using a pair of scissors to cut some hair that was on my massive cock and my massive balls. Did I mention that my penis was massive? Yeah. And my balls were huge? Oh yeah, I did. Hee hee. Anyways, I wasn't looking while cutting my hair on my massive cock and balls because that's kind of gay. The scissors were operating in full capacity when suddenly I felt this ultra severe pain. Like that time my Tinder date bit me with his teeth. Wait, what? There was no scream because I'm going to tell like a little bitch I'm an alpha straight as a line male like me. This is illegible. I had to do everything in my willpower to look at my humongous cock and gigantic balls. And I was simply amazed by how obnoxiously large my huge balls were. I grabbed a toilet paper and started wiping down everything. Tears flew from my eyes as I would not be able to impregnate every woman in this world to uplift the overall intelligence of the human race by producing intellectually superior specimens just like myself. I noticed that I had cleanly cut both of my balls, perfectly performing a vasectomy while not even looking. I'm better than you ball surgeon suckers. My balls were now gone and I was sad because your mom wouldn't be gobbling and sucking them up. I can't finish it! I found this in my comment section. I tried to read it so many times. I literally can't. I literally can't. It's too fucking funny. If you want to see it, it's in the description of the video. Welcome back ladies and gentlemen. It's Wheel of Mutt. I don't know what episode it is, but I do know that we have five wins. And it's been like a... We're in like an episode of... What's that? Weird show. Time Zone? What's the show on thing of its old show? Twilight Zone. We're in like the episode of the Twilight Zone right now. Every game we played is weird, bro. It's either a rage quit, I get screwed over, slash play horrible. It was a good game and then he just left. He just fucking left his Xbox. His mom must have calmed down at dinner or like, I don't know what happened. But we're in the middle of the game, 14-14 and he leaves. I want one. See it through game. That's all I want today. And yes, I know it's not Christmas anymore, but I love Black Santa and I love this tree. It looks so good in the room. It makes me happy. So I'm keeping it. I'm sorry. All right, boys. Yeah, I've noticed a severe problem in the center of our line. We need better guards for sure. Like for sure. Top 10 guess age. I play this game every time I go to the bar. 16, 16. It's always like, well shit, fuck it. Oh my gosh. I gotta edit that out. Hi, I'm Chris Hansen. Welcome to NFL Red Zone. That was a deep joke. Okay. Top 10 players out in the auction house. We're just going to start by overall. More than, holy fuck, Derek Henry's an option. I don't know what Derek Henry is. I'm going to say 29 for Derek Henry. Let's start with that. Derek Henry age. I'm going to start with 29. He's 27. Damn. I thought he was kind of low key washed. Okay. So I'm wrong there. There's Lamar Jackson and Justin Fields. Let's stick with Plummer. I think I'd like Lamar better because he's definitely a lot faster Plummer. Plummer's not that fast, but I'll stick with him for a little bit. I think Dorrell Rivas would be the move, but how old could he be? I'm going to say Dorrell Rivas is 43. He's kind of young. There's players in the league who are older than him. He's 36. Marlon Humphrey? Definitely younger than Derek Henry. I'm going to say 24. Ah, he's 25. Oh, bro. Tough. All right. Last one that I could probably really use here is Rashad Fenton. Rashad Fenton would actually be good. Rashad Fenton is definitely young. The 24 that I tried for Marlon Humphrey is actually what Rashad Fenton is. I'm going to say Rashad Fenton 24. 24 years old, baby. Holy shit. I was almost off. You guys have probably seen this around the date, but his birthday is February 17th. So on February 17th, he's 25. So I am dangerously close. Wait a second. No, I'm not. This is January. I was thinking the month is February. I'm so dumb. Okay, I'm good. Whatever. Rashad Fenton, a 94 overall corner. It's actually really good. One at 98, 600 for a 94 corner. Got Melvin Ingram and Rashad Fenton now. Rashad Fenton, Jalen Ramsey, AJ Terrell, and we actually have Greedy Williams too, who's literally not getting used right now. That's crazy. I don't know what yet, but I'm taking Deflator off Devon White. I'm going to put Lurker on Ted Hendrix. So if I'm in 3-3-5 wide, this Hendrix is just such a savage, dude. Out my way, dominant impact block wins versus wide receivers, hatbacks, and tight ends, and he will also be on the underlock. I'm going to try that. He just put 6 AP on Ted Hendrix. So our first wheel spent so much depth, but I just need, I need an offensive lineman, bro. I need any offensive lineman. Alexa Jack, about three times still, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes. You are talking my language. Find me some O-liman in these elite packs, bro. They're in there. That's what I'm fucking talking about. Oh, Ramchick, Jamie Collins. That's an amazing first pack, dude. Tom Brady, fuck you. Bruce Smith is actually pretty good. Yadda Johnson, Dante Jackson, Warren Sapp. Yeah, it looks like the only thing I can really use here is Warren Sapp, but hey, we will use it. So he's an 81, and then we did pull a center too. I actually kind of glazed past it, but we did pull a gold center, Austin Blight. Did I pull like a shitty middle linebacker to get rid of Nick Neiman finally? Yeah, I pulled Dante Fowler, okay. But that takes us up to an 89 overall. There are no shitty bronzes left in this team other than Ben Cleveland. We have two wins to get to the playoffs. Let's go, baby. Challenge wheel is spinning. There's two more wins that we make the playoffs. And I just had a stroke. Who's a backup? Who's my backup hatbags? It's 90 overall, Walter Peyton, right? Last time we had to do this, it was Tavon Austin. 96, 96, 96, 96, that is a Cowboys team. You can't tell me otherwise. Get a hand off. Oh, I missed that tackle, but six yards for Z. Go get him. Get up, Teddy. Ooh, Devon White came in with the animation. All right, boys, let's lock it in. Let's dial it in. Turn 14. Ooh, there might be a corner out of... Okay, okay, okay. Good hit. I'm about to just blitz. Yup, yup, yup, yup. Let's go. The D line. Dude, it's been so long since my D line's been able to do something like that. That's huge. I might just go straight up for Devonte Adams' touchdowns today. All right, Waller, easy yards. Yup, so there's Devonte Adams. Devonte Adams? Ooh, that got sketchy. But as soon as he stepped off, I knew I had to throw that. Got him. Devonte, holy, so close. Holy shit, he was so close to picking that. Devonte Adams. Great touchdown game, Devonte, right here. He's so used to me throwing over to Devonte Adams' side, he's not going to see Metcalf. Ooh, no, that's bad, that's bad, that's bad. Okay, Hendricks. Whoa, good move. I'm like a sickie. I highly doubt this is up the middle. If it is, I'll take the L. Pass, play, action, pass, play, action. Yup. You get a fucking rage quit. I'm actually pissed because I can't play a goddamn game. This whole season is rage quits. Or trash games. Oh, wait a second, wait a second. We said this is Devonte Adams' three touchdown game. So fucking open. Oh my god, that's two row. I do still need 100 yards of the backup. I'm giving it to Jonathan Taylor. Dude, I hate to say it, bud, but I think your cheeks are clapped. Oh! Hendricks, get there, Hendricks. We're about to do it. We're getting another stop here. He's passing this. Just got to look right up the scene. Oh, oh, oh, no. No! Run, commit, everybody blitz. Give me on Sean Taylor. Let's go. Let's go, boys. Get in there. Oh, no. Oh, no. Get there. Ooh. 100 scrimmage yards, doesn't matter how we get them. We can pass for them. Couple check downs to Walter Payton. Let's try and get like 50-ish here. They really made that catch, but sweetness. I have an amazing idea. We just need it to set up. Come on, come on, come on, come on. Yes, Walter Payton. Yes. That's what I need. That's what I need. Okay. Okay. We started on the 14. We're on the 40. So that's 26 yards with Walter Payton so far. I might get sacked doing this. Nope. And there's Walter Payton. What a throw. Let's go. We got daylight. Hey, I didn't run that very well. We're getting so many yards right now with Walter Payton. Little run. Well, spin. It's not there. It's not there. It's not there. He kind of knows I want to keep going here. Wow. That's unlucky. You know what? Still in one position, Guy. Just over my head and whoa. Could be the run. It's not. Get that throw again. I stood on it that time. I still didn't get the pick, but hey, at least we stopped it. I think he's still just going to stay right on Walter Payton here. He knows I want to throw it. But hey, when things are going good, they're going good. And when they're going bad, they are going bad. Uh-oh. That was a bad ball. Dude, what the fuck? That wasn't even remotely accurate either. You got to fucking love that, dude. There it is. Walter Payton. Holy fuck. This could be a touchdown, though. This could be a touchdown. Oh, he doesn't switch on. He always did it. That's got to be on her plus. But Walter Payton after that, though, that's huge. I don't have to try and do that shit anymore. Six receptions, 104 yards, Walter Payton. My challenge is complete. I can go back to a normal offense that doesn't involve just throwing two Walter Payton. Found the rock, baby. Found the rock. Let's go. It's third and three. We're pounding the rock. Oh my god. He hit me from the back left and somehow warped all the way to the front. Oh, but he's not going to see the Metcalfe touchdown. We're going all or nothing. Big... Oh, just kidding. I literally thought he was doing like a run commit. He actually blitzed to nobody to actually be run committing this time. Yeah. Look at how... Ooh, ooh. Yeah, they're all up there. Right in the middle. Devonte fucking Adams, you called that? And that right there is why he is our next-gen power-up player. I really like it. Actually, ooh. Gonna get Taylor out of the backfield. Great juke. All right, I want him to blitz. Yes, encroachment. Oh my god, that's huge. Third and three, I will take that. That third and eight was big right there. How did that piss you off that bad? It was an encroachment call, bro. The game was not over. Yeah, I get the win. Yeah, I get my challenge complete. And I definitely get a rage quit spent, too. But I just want a game. Like, look at this, bro. Look at this game sheet. It's so weird. These last two games, 14 to 14, he... It's kick for excessive griefing. 16 to 14. He quit. All right, challenge wheel complete. I was scared I might have to use the challenge wheel to salvage somebody. Not the case. We get one pack from the store for the challenge wheel. I like the elite packs right now, low-key. They kind of clutched up earlier. I'm sick of the elite pack. I'm sick of Legends fantasy, so I'm not doing that. And that legend, that elite pack, gonna need to get into animation. There better not have been a god-tier player in there. We'll go check what was in there after. But to run for it, we get a bone nose. Probably our 85 plus. It's a Bruce Smith that we already have. These playoffs are gonna be crazy. I can tell you that. All right, baby, we got a rage quit wheel. Let's see if we can get saw stuff. This would be nice to get offensive linemen off of this somehow. I cannot tell what that says. Ooh, this is a... This is one we've never gotten. Okay, here's how this works. I'm gonna spin the stats wheel first, okay? And then I'll let you know how this works. So let's see how that looks. Impact blocking. Okay, that's actually good. Also, I just wanna say I went and looked at the pack that I didn't get to open. Fucking 90 overall left end in there. Great result. So, impact blocking. Here's the way this works. I'm gonna sort the auction house by overall. Out of that, top 10. Whoever has the best impact blocking stat, I add to my team. All right, here's the top 10 players on the auction house sorted by overall. I had to assume that Leonard Davis has the most impact blocking. I mean, it kind of has to be. His impact block is 89. Yeah. I'm gonna take a guess and say out of all of these players, he probably has the highest. And luckily, he has a series redux. I don't have to buy that really expensive boss legend. Hey, we got a red guard out of it. That is what I'm talking about. And we're one win away from the playoffs. Weird, weird episodes. But it doesn't matter. We're going for another Super Bowl ring. That's all it matters is the other Super Bowl ring. One more win. We're headed to the playoffs, boys. Hey, Jake Plummer. Go give me that hardware, baby. Go give me that ring. I love you, boys. Thank you for watching us always. I'll see you in the next video. Peace out.