 Thanksgiving, for my birthday, hello, hi, how's it going? Hope you're good. One more, there you go. One more, no stop, okay that's enough. For my birthday this year I decided to bake myself a cake without a recipe and so I thought the holiday of Thanksgiving is coming around. Why not put myself to the test once more time and make a whole Thanksgiving feast with no recipe. Now this year is the second year that I have done Thanksgiving friendsgiving and hosted at my house. The year before though, last year my dad was here and he made the turkey and most of the food. So I've never really cooked a Thanksgiving dinner. I've only watched my father and mother prepare a lovely feast. So today we're putting myself to the test to see if I can go deep within my mind's eye and find the recipe for Thanksgiving that is inside of me. And the festive shirt because it says I got my corn cob at the Iowa State Fair. Great, lovely. Let's get started. First things first, we need ingredients. Here they are. We've got a lovely turkey. This is a chicken. We've got things to make the turkey, the stuffing, the potatoes, cranberry sauce just like mother used to make. My mom never made cranberry sauce. It always came from the can. And if you ask any self-respecting American, they'll tell you, you just get the cranberry sauce from the fucking can. Don't go through all the trouble of making it. It takes way too fucking long. It's gonna take forever and it's not even gonna taste that good. The first thing that we are going to do is we are going to prepare the great roast of the turkey. We can leave these here as little festive things. Isn't this festive? Would you say this is festive? Don't shake it now. This is so festive. Look at this. We've got the big big turkey here. Ready to go. What am I doing? What do I want? What do I need? What do I need? Do I need to take things out of the turkey? Chicken? Something. Probably. God, doesn't that look good? Doesn't that look great? Zoom in. Zoom in. Zoom in. Look at that. No. It's so awful. Oh my poor chicken. What did they do to you? First, we've got to see what this guy's all about. What are the giblets? I don't remember. Okay. Do I need to go in here? Giblets. Oh, it's really cold in there. It's really cold in there. Look at how, look at, look. You can see the whole future in there. Justin, zoom in. What's in their future? Oh my God. So now, part two of our sweet exercise. Nothing says turkey quite like inside of it. What's inside of it? Right? And now, we will put some things inside of the turkey. Welcome to Eat the Nestor's big turkey recipe for Thanksgiving. No one does it quite like me. Okay, we're going to take two whole carrots and a little bit of these. We want two whole carrots. We want some celery, one stalk, two stalk celery. We want a half of a quarter half. What you're going to do is you're going to chop all those up in the little bite-size pieces and you're going to put them inside of your bird. First, we need to do a little bit of peel. Where is my peeler? Last time I used one of these, I snipped the top of my finger off and I had to get my finger cauterized and they said this isn't going to hurt at all. It did and I passed out and I said fuck to the nurse. Did she appreciate it? I don't know, but not my problem. It was my problem because my finger was fucking cut off. Great. We've got this, we've got that. Now we need half of an onion. Now you're going to keep the other half for the stuffing that we're going to use later on. We're going to do a little bit of this, a little bit of chop-chop. Great. I don't even think we actually need half of an onion. I think a quarter of an onion is grand. Now we need a little bit of a fucking bowl. Good. Into the bowl she goes. Great. Now you might be thinking to yourself, Ethan, what are you doing in here? What are you preparing? Sometimes people like to take some things, make a big little thing, put it in. That's why it's called stuffing, isn't it? It's, that's why they call it stuffing. Oh my god. I am a genius. We never cooked the stuffing inside of the bird when I was a wee boy. This is going to be a first for me. Great. You don't get to see what I'm doing anymore. It's a secret. This is my kitchen secret. You've missed my secret ingredient. Cutting two of these up at once for efficiency. Now, in here, we've got many ingredients, right? We've got, we've got onion. We've got carrots. We've got celery. We've got all the works. I don't like raw onion. I don't want, I don't want. That means if the stuffing goes in the thing, then I have to put bread in, right? That's how this works. How much bread do I want? This seems like enough bread. Do I use raw bread or do I use toasted bread? I'm not sure. So we're going to do both. I'm going to put this in the toaster. Okay. This is one, two, three, four, five times two. Now we're doing this. This, now this looks fucking good. Into the bowl, it goes. Now we have bread. Now, what else do we need? We need something to oil this bitch up. Do I not have olive oil? Olive oil. Ooh, apple cider vinegar. This might be good in here. I like the smell of it. So we're going to put a little bit in. Why? Well, because I'd like to. We're going to put it in a little bit of this. Good. What do you think of when you think of Thanksgiving? That's right. White people. And what do we not use a lot of? Spices. But here today, I'm going to change the game, okay? Because I've got so many spices in here. What? Oh, look at all the herbs. This is everything I need. Oh, also, I don't think I prefaced this video. Jocelyn got me all of the ingredients. Zero recipe. Okay. So if you think about it, if you think about it, I could make the perfect meal. Will I? Yeah. Fuck you. We're going to put some see what I have to do folks. I have to spend my valuable time and effort and all of my strength. I have to spend my valuable time and efforts into opening these herbs and spices. All 11 of them. No. It's too late, Jocelyn. Don't say to me. Don't take up the frame. Good. We've got sage. A little bit of this. Good. A little bit of this. Parsley. A little bit of this. Time. I wish I had more of it. Don't you? Now, the classic. A little bit of salt. Never wrote nobody. You hear that? That means our things are done. Oh, fuck. They're hot. Great. Grand. Splendid. Listen to that crunch. Now, get familiar with the stuffing that you've made, okay? This is going to bake inside of your bird. If the bird bakes, internal temp of a chicken is 165 degrees. So, that means if I cook the bird at 425 in 45 minutes, it should be done, right? I don't know. So, we have the base of our stuffing. We bring the bird back from the dead. We take him, we caress him. Now, this hole, we remember. You remember this guy? Justin, put my face in the hole. The stuffing is going into the bird, and the bird will go in the oven. Our stuffing will be stuffed into the bird, and when we slice open the bird, the stuffing will fall onto the plate. This is the way the tradition goes, and this is the way that I will make it. Now, let's roll this bird. Are we supposed to clean it? Am I supposed to clean it? Yeah. This is how you do it. Just fill it with water. Do you think anybody ever does shots from a bird? You can fill it with tequila. I'm not going to, because I don't want poisoning of... Look, he's flying. Butter. You can't tell me what to do, Jocelyn, this whole video. This is not supposed to give me ideas. Not supposed to give me ideas. I'm supposed to have the ideas. Now, it's time that we season the bird. We'll flip this bad boy over. And then, even though it was spoiled to me, I guess I should put butter on the bird, even though the whole video is me going without a recipe. Jocelyn had to ruin the video. So the video turns out bad, and you go, God, this sucked. It's because Jocelyn told me to put butter on the bird, okay? Don't complain to me when the video is bad. Okay? Complain to Jocelyn. Melting it. The butter. This is what Thanksgiving is all about. What are you thankful for this year? It's like an artist making a painting. I am making the bird. Yep. Right there. Yeah. Nice. Now, that's a nice job with that bird. You've got to season your bird. So many people nowadays think, I don't need to season my bird. Wrong. You know, so many people just do the same thing every year. Not me, not the way I do it. We're going to be mixing it up this year. I'm thinking we want something spicy, a little bit of chili powder. Never hurt nobody. Could be a little spicy little bird. That could be kind of cool. That could be kind of good. A little bit of cayenne pepper. Never hurt nobody. And a little bit of whatever this is. I don't know what this is, but a little bit of it never hurt nobody. You're thinking, Ethan, what if I don't want a spicy bird? Good for you. There's another side. And on the other side, we will put some parsley on the bird. Some more salt on the bird. Jocelyn's making a stinky face behind the camera. And I'm just wondering, yeah, we're in front of house. I didn't fucking make the food. You think I'd be making this video if I made the food? No. One bay leaf to go atop the bird. It's time we stuff this bird full of the stuffing. Now, don't be afraid. Okay. Why do they call it stuffing? Because you have to stuff the bird's asshole. Okay. So make sure you get a healthy gulp of everything that you made. Get those onions in there. Get those celery bits in there, the carrots. Now, last thing, and this is very important, we must tie up the bird. All right. So now after a few minutes, your bird should be all good and tied up. Our oven is preheated and ready to go. And put this bad boy in here. I am going to, I had to flip the bird around a couple of times just to make sure it was all tied up nice and good. All right. Now we've got our bird. It's ready for the oven. I'm putting it in the oven. Good to go. I thought there was a fire outside. It's that reflecting off of the window. Whoops. All right, folks. Next up is the classic. While we wait for our bird to cook, it's time for a little bit of mother's favorite sauce of the cranberry variety. We've got cranberries and cranberries. Thinking about this rationally, thinking about this rationally, cranberry sauce should just be cranberries. Turn this on low heat. We're going to do a stick of butter and sugar. How much sugar? I'm going to say a cup of sugar. It's probably a cup. Relax. Cranberries, a cup of sugar, a stick of butter. What else could possibly be in there? You know, if I just do a smidge of mashing, right, then this should be good. Make sure that your butter is near the bottom of the pan. All right. Because in good time, this will turn from butter and cranberries into sugar to cranberries. Okay. But you just have to give it a little bit of time. You don't want the butter to burn. Don't want the sugar to burn. To sugar burn? Mm-hmm. You made a big old face when I put in a whole stick of butter in here. But I think that it's a good amount of butter. It's going to make it juicy. It's going to make it flavorful. It's going to make it all sorts of good, good. Okay. Make sure you're zooming in on that. Make sure you're zooming. Make it dynamic. Jocelyn, you have to make it dynamic. You have to make it dynamic. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I want to see more zooms. All around, I want to see more zooms. Not that chaotic. There has to be order amongst the chaos. I am the chaos. Okay. I do the chaos thing. You have to bring a little bit of order, but dynamic order. No. Incorrect. I mean, yes. But there has to be dynamic camera movement. Is that making up for you? Shut up. Look at this cranberry soup that we've made. Soon it will be a sauce. A lovely, lovely sauce. Now, apparently, we're supposed to just let these berries cook for a little bit. Okay. I don't think there's enough sugar in here. I'm going to put a little bit more sugar. Stir this on in. And we're just going to let that sit for a moment. Just a moment. Okay. We're going to sit. Let that simmer for a moment. Not everything has to be so feisty, you know. Maybe we sit and think about what we're grateful for. Huh? It's Thanksgiving after all. Why don't you let me know what you're grateful for down in the comments section below. What am I grateful for? Probably my charm, my good looks, my humbleness, my good sense of humor, my willingness to keep going even when sometimes I just want this train to stop. Train keeps going down these tracks and we don't know where the last station is. But we stay on the train all the same. We keep going, trusting the conductor to take us to that final stop. Will it be worth it in the end when we reach that final destination? Will we feel like the ride was worth it? Will we appreciate the sights that we saw along the way? Maybe some of our fellow passengers that we met. Or will we look back and regret ever buying that ticket? Gotta let that get to a simmer. Boil. It's got a boil. It has to boil. That's it. I figured it out. It has to boil first and then we bring it down to a simmer. You can't fool me, Dawson. I know how to cook. Not yet the red consistency. We should check in on the bird. The bird! The bird! Can you see me over here? No? Can you see me now? Let's look at the bird. Oh wow. It's not done yet. It's much to go on the bird. Much to go on the bird. Okay. Last thing to do. The classic. The potatoes. I'm going to take one, two, three, four, five, six potatoes. Cut them up. You know how it goes. Juggle? You want me to juggle? Hold on. Hold on. That was pretty good honestly. There's a bunch of shit on these potatoes. Make sure you wipe them off a little bit. Get them all nice. And clean. Before proceed with the making of the potatoes. All right. You know how knives work. I'm going to cut these up. You don't need to see it. Okay. Potatoes are potatoing. Time to drain the potato. Good job, potato. We put this there and then we take this and we put it back inside. Great. Now comes the time to mash said potato. Okay. Now many people might be thinking, Ethan, you left the skin on. You stupid whore. I know I left the skin on. I left the skin on because I, for one, like the skin. Okay. I enjoy the skin of the potatoes. Now you might not and that's fine. Whatever. I don't care if you don't like the skin of the potatoes. I don't care at all actually because this is my Thanksgiving dinner. This is my eavesgiving. Stick of butter. Put the stick of butter in there. The bird. The bird sings for us. The bird sings. All right. All right. It can still use a little tiny bit more time. Then we're going to do about that much milk. A little bit of salt. Now we get to mashing real good. Mash potatoes. Have I ever made them? Nope. Time for a taste. I threw up in my mouth a little bit. Don't worry about it. Oh, this is pretty good. It is too much salt. Gamers, it is just about game time. It's time to take the titular bird out of the oven. The timer has gone off and so it's time to get this bird out. Okay, go go. What is the internal cooking temperature of the chicken? Just like I thought. The moment of truth. We're good. It's time to carve the biggest bird of them all. We release the little slot from its tethers. The chicken. This is not looking exactly done. What about this though? Oh, now that part doesn't look too shabby. The last part of Thanksgiving is always serving yourself a nice gooping plate of your meal. We've got the cranberry sauce. We've got the potatoes and of course a little bit of our lovely bird and our stuffing. Gamers, we almost forgot about our stuffing. Now dare I say it, a feast fit for a king. Nice of you to join me. We've got our cranberry sauce. We've got our potatoes. We've got the works. Now we just honestly, if I'm being honest, it's not bad. It's really not bad. Mashed potatoes are good. Good consistency. Nice little skin on there for some very taste. Definitely a little salty. A little bit of salt. A little bit too much salt. The cranberry sauce. Look at the texture on that. Honestly, the cranberry sauce is actually a good, like it's really fucking sweet. Now for the stuffing. Now the stuffing, the stuffing is interesting. The stuffing is definitely like real moist, but my family never could put the stuffing in the bird. It's not bad. It's definitely like soggy, but the elements are there. It's weird because it's soggy. The bread is soggy, but the carrots are underdone. And then the chicken is mostly just bland. Like it's just a little dry. They're not dry. It's actually juicy. Spice wise though, it's bland. Jocelyn is behind the camera looking very upset. Chill out. Fuck it. Chill out. I did this with no recipe. I would like, if you may, Jocelyn, I would like you to make yourself a little plate, okay? Or I would like if you would like to make yourself a little plate and I would like a review of what I have done. All of it is technically edible. But it's like passable. You're not going to have a stomach ache. I promise you. Justin Jocelyn and witness protection. Right? Like it's not great. If I had this at somebody's house, I'd be like, this is kind of rough. But as far as like, what would you rate this out of 10? Give it a solid rating. If you went to somebody's house and they served you this, what would you give this out of 10? Five out of 10? Five out of 10. No recipe. No recipe. Five out of 10. I think that's pretty good. Okay. Well, which is it? Five or four? Yep. The bird's bland. Taters are not bad. Definitely too salty though. Yeah. In the cranberries while out of 10. Let's get Spencer's review. I want your honest review. Pretty good. Would you say pretty good? I think he thinks that is pretty good. Well, folks, I would say that this was a smashing success. I would say that no recipe, no prior knowledge, just pure instinct. I would say that I did pretty damn good with this. And hey, that's something in itself to be thankful for. All right? So, I hope your corns get cobbed. This Thanksgiving. I hope that wherever you are in the world, you're having a dandy time. Happy holidays to all. We're getting into the holiday season. The joyous time of year. The festive time of year. A time to be thankful of the things that we have and a time to be hopeful for the things that are coming. So don't forget, stay grateful, stay good. And I'll see you in the next video, whatever that may be. I'll see you in the next one. Bye, guys. Okay, this is about Thanksgiving.