 Hey everyone, it's been easy your community outreach specialist bringing you a very special video today I'm with Corporal Madden right there. There's his proof Rick Cochran And we're bringing you guys a joke off. I Don't know what's gonna happen Other than the fact that I'm about to crush the game Would you like me to say something sure? Tell the people. How do you feel right now? Are you prepared? What bring it? I am my own Right. Yes. That is it. That is it. That is it done Okay, the book. Okay. What it just happened. It's on it is on This is the only smile Please okay, unless I bring a mirror. Okay. You ready? Okay. All right. Where do I store all of my dad jokes? in the garbage In a database So you came prepared today or I I don't know that I did okay That was okay. That's fine. You're right. Yeah, that's fine. So now the jokes are gonna begin. What right? Tell us how you really feel. Oh, mm-hmm. Yep. I'm here for it. What did the horse say to the scarecrow No, okay. All right. That's right. Oh Mark that one off as a failure. Please do epic failure. There you go Here on that too. All right Why can't Simba be trusted Because he's a lion king It didn't even trigger the humor boom. It's cuz you laughed too much coming into this listen, okay? I told you I was coming in whatever that's fine. That's fine like angry. That's fine or sleep the pride Is that what this is? I don't know what's going on right now. What was that? Oh Are you ready? What yes, that has to count for that. That's a joke. It might be. Yes. No, that's a joke That's what that is right there. Okay, then. I'll take it. No. No. Yeah, I'm here for it. Let's go When do you know a snail is lying When he says he's not home He carries his home with him. Why didn't the prison mates get along? because they didn't gel jail gel So look, I'm not even gonna go there. I just turned up at that I'm on a serious note. Did you hear about the kid that make it to school? It's fine teacher. Oh, that happened. I need for you to do better. I need for you to do it. I mean, what is the score right now? It's we're zero zero zero zero zero zero. Okay, cuz I am know I'm hilarious. Okay. I mean What do you get when a lawyer and a box have a baby lawyer in a box a Baby, you have a basket case I'm gonna move right on to the this is the funny one. It says right I Heard it Did I hear it? No? Yeah, what what do we have so my my son to me? You know, you can't read my soul. Okay, but my son said Cuz I want them to read it Said dad, I think I'm suffering from kleptomania. I said you should take something for that Crickets How are we not doing this? I'm funny Didn't get that one maybe in five minutes. I'll get it but kleptomania they take things so you should take What do cereal boxes love to do at slumber parties, oh they like to Do This whole explain the thing so my son said dad I'm refusing taking that I said you do know that means you're resisting arrest, right? Oh Yeah, that happened. I don't know you're saying no Come on. He was resistant. That was good. Not really not like loud not written down But why did the cup of coffee file a police report because it got creamed it got mugged Oh, I like creamed But I get mugged. I've told you this joke before though. I really thought I forgot it. How about this one? You like dogs, right? Yes. You have a dog, baby. Yes. All right. So did you know that dogs cannot operate an MRI machine? Only cat scam. Oh Yeah, oh, yeah Jokes to get something on What was the alcoholics favorite holiday New Year's drinks giving not even the wood mr. Woody think that funny She doesn't count unless you want to bring it on and bring it in want to bring it up Darn it. All right. So how about this one Thanksgiving you get it Thanksgiving tomorrow? Speaking of Thanksgiving. Yes, we're on a road trip and my son my son said hey, dad We got stopped. I need to use the restroom Sounds like you're in trouble I need for you to make better choices You're in trouble. Damn it. All right all down But you get it though, right here. Don't look at my jokes You're in you highlight the ones that you were good. Yes, cuz I brought a lot brought my eight game in and then some No, I'm not the case. Okay Okay, how do how do they say see you later in Middle East in the Middle East? See delivery is important. So what is it? My expectation was way here Why don't they gamble in Africa too many cheetahs I'm so upset. Oh, I hear football kickers such great debaters. They always get the extra play So my son woke up this morning. He said dad. He said dad. I had a dream as a muffler. I said you must be exhausted No, nothing not even a little bit That doesn't count Just leave it out. All right. Okay. What did the tree say to the bark when it wanted to quit? Don't worry, buddy. Stick with it stick tree bark My son said dad Is milk the fastest liquid on the planet and I said yes, it pastries so fast you didn't see it pastries No So I was the doctor the other day. I'm pretty upset about it. I was told that I actually have high blood pressure. I'm so salty So I went to a restaurant the person greeting me said welcome to our restaurant. Do you have reservations? I said no, I'm pretty sure I want to eat here You know like reservation like in my in my door run. All right. All right. I'll go no Darn it Why was the man laying down at Starbucks? He needed a little pick me up. I feel bad. I don't even still get it Coffee a pick me up Starbucks, why did the grapes stop running in the middle of the road? You ran out of juice And since him running out Why did you start running in the first place? He thought he had enough juice You saying it over no not helping You know what okay, oh that means you know we got you got anything else for me. I'll even let you use this Okay No, no really hold on hold on wet when in doubt What is Dracula's favorite circus act? How about this one yeah, how about this one so why did the tomato blush? Because he saw the salad dressing No Thanksgiving theme What is no Thanksgiving dressing salad? I Got a follow-up to that one. I can't wait to give it to you. No, you're gonna like it just as much What do you call a ghost that can rap and act? class To pop chicken come on come audience How about this one you guys? Why? Why did the carrot get embarrassed because he saw it chickpea? Oh Yeah, that happened I'm putting a smiley face because I thought it was funny I don't know. I think we had a lot of we have more. Yeah, I have one more. I'll bring it. Okay. I'll pull up my best Wait Camera doesn't mean you don't get it Make sure your phone numbers. I can play. Okay. No, look why did the woman break up with the alcoholic? She didn't think the relationship had a shot at making Louie over a cute I Sunset dad is the cat sick. I said, yeah, it's not feeling well Your eyebrows shaking because I want to laugh but I won't There's no points against eyebrow shaking How do we do I mean I have more I did great. I did great. I mean Anger listen, I got more for example. Okay. Give me one more just because All right, it says that's it my son said dad. I think I'm having an allergic reaction. We need to go to the hospital I said, do you need to make any rash decisions? That made my eye twitch because it was that good. No, that was like a deep Dad I got hit in the head today with a cola at least it was a soft drink. No, come on I'm hilarious people I'm hilarious We all hope that you enjoyed what you got to hear a little bit of The jokes I'm I'm still hilarious. Okay. I'm hilarious, but In everyone's mind because my audience my peanut gallery was cracking up. Okay, but Everyone have a great holiday Time out timing. Can I make a joke? Yes The referee gets to make a joke So since tomorrow's Thanksgiving, I wanted to give you guys one of my jokes. All right Oh, yeah, it's good When you can't even get your joke out. That's why we didn't pick her to be the other way I know what you call a turkey running down the street the day after Thanksgiving. What? Lucky. No, happy holidays. I'll see you next week