 What's up you guys welcome to the single guy channel. I'm Lloyd and today we're gonna be talking about a subject that I know all about and that's rejection When it comes to getting rejected by women, I have a pretty long and familiar history when it comes to this matter I mean when I was in high school. I asked a girl out to prom in front of the entire class and she said no I Every pretty much every girl that I asked out and in high school rejected me And sometimes it would take me months to a year to work up the courage to even ask her out in the first place In college every fraternity that I rushed pretty much turned me down Pretty much every girl that I that I asked out in college Rejected me even one girl that I had tried for an entire year to get Said no to me. There's a lot of experiences that I had in college in high school that Maybe pretty familiar with what it's like to get rejected by a girl at the end of college I was like I got to figure this stuff out. So I started going out a lot I started watching all the pickup videos that were online at the time. And so what happens when you first start going out? Well, when you first start going out you get rejected a lot. It happens a lot to you So I was getting more and more negative experiences from talking to women because most of the girls that I talked to Weren't interested. They didn't really want to talk to me or you know They had boyfriends or whatever the thing was and I was constantly getting all these negative Experiences from the interactions. The common knowledge is is that the more you get rejected the more immune to rejection You get and so eventually what a lot of these pickup coaches tell you is they tell you that eventually you're you're just going to be immune To rejection it's not going to affect you anymore because it's happened to you so many times now There is a kernel of truth to this, but I think it's mostly bullshit. Okay, if you get nothing but rejections in your life It's not going to build confidence. It's going to make you less Confident because you know what's going to happen when you walk up. You're probably going to get rejected So this was happening to me so much that I knew I had to change the way that I thought about this Or I was going to give up entirely and just be miserable for the rest of my life To the way that I started thinking about rejection and this can be a little bit extreme in some areas But I started to think that rejection Doesn't exist. Okay, stay with me So how many times have you gone out and walked up to a girl and talked to her have her not be interested at 10 p.m. And then you talked to her at 1 a.m. Or even midnight and she was totally interested She was way into you and then she came home with you that night I can't tell you the number of times that this has happened to me. It's happened so much I can't even count I mean how many times has a girl broken up with you and then you guys have gotten back together How many times has a girl rejected you and then later on down the line you've ended up sleeping with her? Sometimes it's been years sometimes I've had girls that are like that thought I was Disgusting that would never have touched me with a 10-foot pole and then three years later We were having sex every single day like rabbits I mean this these kinds of experiences have happened to me so many times even to the extreme where a married woman Has rejected me and then later on we've ended up sleeping together because the husband they got separated with the husband or You know was impending divorce or something like that? Okay? So I got this kind of idea in my head that it's never over. It really is never over I mean your girl rejecting you doesn't really mean that much. It's not too much of any of a hit to your ego What it is is more just the situations and agendas that are around at the time You know not every girl that you talked to was gonna want to sleep with you that night And that's what I was looking for like I was looking for a girl to go home with me that night Sure, there's gonna be girls that are gonna be down for that, but there's they're not gonna be as many as you think There's a lot of girls out there that kind of want to have a drink and get to know somebody and they want a guy That's gonna stick around I wasn't I definitely wasn't the last part of that The more you sort of think of things as things being agendas as opposed to like this girl likes you and this girl Doesn't like you then I think that's gonna take your ego out of the picture a little bit more and help you out when Dealing with just tons of girls, you know not being interested or wanting to talk to you But at the same time you want to keep your ego in the picture a little bit as well You want to make sure that you're learning because if your ego is completely outside of the picture You're not gonna change your behavior You're gonna keep doing the same things and just thinking oh well our genders didn't line up or agendas didn't line up You want to have a healthy amount of analysis and realize that you know, what could I have changed in this area? What could I've done differently? You want to have a healthy healthy amount of that because if you don't then you're never gonna improve But at the same time accepting full responsibility For every single interaction and everything that happens is your fault is a very dangerous and toxic way of thinking about things And that can get you into a lot of trouble and that's kind of what was happening to me at the beginning I wanted to give up and I was so depressed because I was blaming myself for everything that was happening and What I should have been doing was I should have been realizing that look There's certain things out of my control even the best guys out there are gonna get a little bit of rejection I mean even if if you think about a bodybuilder a bodybuilder is someone who goes to the gym and works out and he doesn't work out Comfortably where he just lifts the weights doesn't even try and then leaves because he's super strong already No, he's gonna work till failure and he's gonna work and try and make himself and push his limits and figure out Where his limitations are and then he's gonna fail He's gonna fail if he's lucky every single time he goes to the gym And it's okay if you fail a little bit when you're going out and the girls don't want to talk to you or Girl is not gonna come home with you. It's totally okay It happens to the best even as I stand to you right now or if I go out and I try really really hard I'd say probably like 80% of the time. I'm going home with a girl that I like It's I still like at least twice during the night will have an interaction that doesn't go exactly the way I want to sure there's sometimes where you're on fire and everything seems to be going your way But there's a lot of nights where that's not happening and most of those nights are gonna be the nights that you go out So if you start to think about things in this manner where rejection, you know, if it exists It's really not that big of a deal And then you also want to bring your ego out of the picture think about it as kind of an experiment adjust things Move things left and right and then figure out where to go from there Okay, so don't remove your ego completely from the picture because otherwise you're never gonna have motivation to learn but do it in a way that's healthy and realize that look man like This happens to the best of us it still happens to me right now It happens a lot less because I know what situations to approach and where to go and you know I can read women a lot better than I could before and my verbal game is a lot better, but overall I'd say that my thinking about it contributed to my growth a lot more because when I was in that really low state I was going out and I was really angry all the time and it was crushing my confidence So thinking about it in this manner helps me a lot in this situation Thanks a lot you guys. Hopefully that helped out if you liked what you saw and you made it to the end of this video Consider subscribing and come out with videos like this every single week trying to provide some value for you guys Thanks a lot and I'll see you later