 this is actually something that a lot of people want to talk about um you know what does it always come down to uh for like for the big big male struggle you know there's money sex um and I guess you could say like anger or something like that but yeah in those toxic relationships you know uh with we'll start with business because you you highlighted that one um what what were some of the things that really set you off about a characteristic and yeah I'll tell you this for myself they always they're they kind of align they're they're very transparent through everything you know whether that's relationships or business or business relationships or intimate relationships what were some of those things that kind of like the red flags that that set you off there I was when I was in China many years ago I went to see this fortune teller and um he told me my fortune which was loosely translated by the girl I was with that was something like you are a little famous now and you'll be more famous later you will be a good friend but a terrible husband and do not do business with your best friends almost words of the Chinese guy and he was pretty much right I was a bad husband I'm definitely a good friend and I've certainly had some bad experiences doing business with friends and I'm a little bit more famous now as we can tell by the old what's going on here um so well what I learned was that I always watch people's actions never listen to their words I think that's that's the primary thing so there's a lot of there's a lot of really good bullshit artists out there there's a lot of people who are very good at convincing themselves it's not so much I don't yeah totally they don't even mean to do wrong you know people are just very good at deleting themselves so I typically now in terms of all the business because I do do a lot of business with friends it's the nature of this business sure the people that I work with I live with I travel with all the time they have they're very close friends of mine and I've had a lot of guys come through this business who were great seduces exceptional ladies men um and just not very reliable people um so yeah I think it's really important to watch what watch people's actions so if someone like ignore everything that they say same goes with women like women will tell you all sorts of funny stuff um and if you listen carefully to it and only focus on the words you'll miss what they're actually trying to tell you you know the old we're not having sex tonight sentence you know if I go home with you I'm not going to sleep with you yeah that kind of thing that sounds logical and that sounds right but really she probably doesn't mean that there's that's otherwise she wouldn't come home with you but yeah I think that's what I've really looked at and I and the other thing is I look at um because now that I'm in a position where I'm a little bit famous you know weird niche I get a lot of people coming to me all the time wanting to do things for me or help me or be involved oh man yeah um which is nice yeah it's nice to have fans I wish they were hot chicks instead of like you know yeah yeah I'm like it's kind of like being a rock star but not quite as good um no offense to any of the guys that came and talked to me it's not your fault you're not a hot chick it's my fault for being not being a rock star um so yeah the other thing is I look very carefully at how do people treat other people not just the person that they're trying to impress so it's very easy to be sycophantic and and appear to be awesome in front of somebody but I really watch people carefully in terms of how do they treat a waiter um how do they treat someone how would they treat someone that they perceive they have power over is something that I'm really interested in yeah because that's where I notice nasty things coming out when someone you know treats the treats the hired help badly I'm like I don't really want to deal with that person yeah I don't want people who decide that some people are worth more than others based on what job they have or how much money they have or what race they are or whatever