 Hello people, welcome back to another Autie Time Live. I have been absolutely awful with keeping up to date with these live streams, so I am glad to be back today. If you're joining in from the YouTube side of things, you will notice that my green screen is not working, and that's because OBS is deciding to be particularly irritating today, so yeah. Hello Lola, how are you doing? Let's see a Hello Books Writes draw. Hello Nida, how's it going? So I'll wait a little bit until people start settling in a bit more. This week's been a bit sort of up and down for me I would say, just a little bit weakly kind of checking. I have been trying to get myself back in the routine of doing work for like quite at least like a couple of months now, so I'm still trying to iron out like what is good for me to do or not. I've spent a lot of days this week pretty sleepless I would say. I'm not having enough sleep, it's just more like my sleep routine is just all over the place at the moment. Huge house, thank you. Hello Angela, nice to see you. Hello Bertodkami. And hi from Sweden and the gym. Hello, Aksaren. You guys are funny. Right, so usually what the process is for these live streams and I know I haven't done them in a while. I'll be likely like quite a few people who have come in, some like new followers and stuff like that. So basically this is an opportunity to ask me any questions about like the content that I'm putting out or if you've got any particular questions that I haven't covered in my content that you can jump in. Ask me questions, no wrong questions although I will use my own personal discretion to decide which ones to answer. Sorry to hear that you're having trouble. Yeah well it's, you know, I mean I can't really complain a lot of stuff is going well for me at the moment so it's just about trying to remind myself that when I'm going through a rough patch. I'm always very honest about how I feel like I'm not going to jump on to a live stream and like just like say hey guys I'm feeling great today. This week's been amazing. It's been a movie-esque experience, worthy of online content. No, I'm definitely not that kind of person. Thank you very much Mr. Austin. You're a member for nine months. Oh my god. EG. Thank you so much dude. How is your live stream going? Hello Mr. Joshua Jean. Nice to see you. Our hydration manager. Why is it so hard to start adding new habit when autistic? I find that in general once I'm in the flow of like a specific habit or routine I'm pretty good with it. It is quite hard to break it once I have it and also like starting up something new is always going to be somewhat of like a transition. There's always going to be some unknown sort of elements to it. You're not really always going to know what to expect in every way and even if it's not necessarily the largest of changes with like a lot of potential negatives. It can still sort of freak your nervous system out a little bit, not to be in like a routine that you've been in for a while. So it's kind of the thing that I say about going to the gym and this probably like applies to everybody. Not just autistic people, you know. It's always going to be hard starting something. Once you're in the flow of it, it becomes a lot more easy, I would say. Yeah. Probably doing some horror game to every out to this weekend. Very cool. I am thinking of playing a few horror games on live stream in place of Reanscape. Although I do want to do a couple of Reanscape and Chill sessions at some point. I feel very nervous and stressed about Christmas. I gave that every year is exhausting to me. My mum has similar thoughts about Christmas and such. She really enjoys it and she wants it to be the best that it can be. And sometimes that puts a lot of pressure. Slender man. I was thinking more some like, I don't know. I used to watch some streams of, like I do watch them now and again of like Markiplier. So I find him to be, I don't know. There's not many like people that I can watch and just like receive consistent hits of like serotonin. But he just makes me laugh so much. So I was thinking of playing like, I think they've made some updates to it like SCP Containment Breach. Because at the moment my bedtime routine is very much like, you know, I'll do a bit of agility on Reanscape. Some mindless thing that I can just kind of focus on. And I listened to SCP stories on YouTube. I've earned them quite relaxing even though they can be a little bit graphic sometimes. I used to watch Markiplier a lot. Yeah, me too. It's like, it's not a consistent thing. But now and again, yeah, totally. How are you doing today? I just did a big talk to a drug and alcohol charity yesterday at a head teachers conference as well about some lived experiences for autism. Very, very good area to talk on. 100% there is a lot of, you know, crossovers between autism, mental health, but also with like, as you said, things related to like alcohol and stuff. So good on you. That is really cool. I mean, sort of on a similar topic, I have actually recorded a podcast today for any people waiting on when my next podcast is going to be. I think it's probably been like three months since the last time that I produced one. But it's going to be the start of season three, which is going to be kind of a new, I guess, chapter, I suppose. And I interviewed Miyabi Shields PhD on Instagram if you want to go check him out. And we were talking about autism and medical cannabis and stuff in the in the US. It was a really interesting topic to talk about. I'll survive for starting new habit when autistic. I'm trying to try to keep the changes as minimal as possible. I'm going through things because if you try and change, there is a sort of a. At least a feeling for me that I just want to like change as many things as possible in a short period of time. But definitely take it slow, you know, and maybe try and implement some at the same time, maybe try and implement some like self care related things. There was there was like a piece of content that I watched recently on YouTube that was talking about like a specific form of breathing. I can't remember the name of it, but it's it's basically a lot to do of like sort of the pressure on your your heart and stuff. It's kind of like activates and deactivates your sympathetic and person parasympathetic nervous system, depending on whether you're inhaling or exhaling. So the technique is basically on you're supposed to be like sat down for this. But if you can do it like just a little bit or even flight five minutes, it does show immediate and long term effects on like reducing anxiety, which is a note. It's kind of like one of those things, you know, it's like psychotherapists are always talking about breathing techniques and it can get a bit like patronizing at some point. But it has a measurable difference for me, to be honest. So basically what you do is you just you basically take a sharp inhale, like as much as you can really as quickly, I'll probably do it. And then you take a little bit more of a breath, and then you let the breath out slowly. So you go like, it does actually work. You know, I found that it does kind of it doesn't it's not like a life changing about anxiety reduction. But it definitely works for me because it's I can feel the effects almost instantly. I fall asleep to creepypasta and horror stuff. Yeah, me too. Hello everyone to and doing particularly good today that is good to hear my official diagnosis or HD Tuesday of this week. And 46 I welcome the service bunny to help wait for my service Labrador dog in June. Congratulations. Congratulations. Really like to do that stuff. I used to work in like alcohol and SA prevention. That's really interesting Austin. I just came to the autistic realization today that whenever I look at my phone contacts, I get a massive wave of anxiety. They relate and we do have again, always forever helpful. Mr. Joshua G. Williamson with a hydration reminder, hydration manager of the the live stream. You should get those hydration gains and say this every time. But like, I think it's useful for autistic people. But like for me as well, I forget to drink when I do these things. So very helpful. Have you ever had any pets? Yeah. I mean, I grew up. I've grown up with like lots of different dogs like in my life. You know, it's. I mean, I like to say it like my big brother's a dog because my parents got him like a year before I was born. He's called Bob jet black mongrel from the shelter. Beautiful, beautiful dog. I loved him so much. He lived quite a long time actually mongrels do tend to be that way sometimes. Yeah, I love pets. I think they're great. I just executive function for myself is already quite difficult. So I'll have to be like in a good mental space to be like, you know, feel confident in being able to care for another animal. I just forget to eat me too, especially when I'm working. Mr Austin with a gifted sub for Jordan Wilson. Thank you very much for that. Mr Austin, your grand. Make sure to say thank you if you can, Jordan, Jordan, Jordan. Any progress in the gym you're proud of? Not just new gains or personal best any anything even had spaces and consistency at the moment. I'm going three times a week, which is working for me at the moment because I've been doing it hard for like a long time. And I kind of want to take a bit more time for myself to do things that I enjoy other than the gym. So I've been doing that. I mean, I'm three times a week and it's been going pretty good. And yeah, I mean, just all around progress, I would say. I'm trying to try to grow the old peck muscles at the moment. It's always been like a lagging body part for me. Seeing some some progress there. I'm nice at Freddy's. Yeah, I've heard of that. I made HD. Would you say that say when it comes to being obsessed with something with autism, there's a honeymoon phase. And then that obsession gradually cools off after a while. It depends some some interest that I have a very much like long standing passions. Whereas they do have little things on the outside that tend to be like hobby related that I do dip into now and again. Most of them are quite consistent, I would say, though. I mean, I do like variety. I do like doing new things and such kind of makes life a bit more interesting sometimes when I can handle it. But most of my life is pretty consistent. You know, I do the things I enjoy pretty, pretty consistently to to explain certain challenges with executive functioning. Yeah. I am very vocal about this. I'm not the best. I'm not going to lie. It's always been a difficulty for me. I was going to Hello Readly. I was good. And I just says I was going to university doing a degree in addiction and social work before I went in burnout spiral and lost my job at 21 years in hospital. Now I'm redefining myself. Your shells helped me by the way. And I thank you for sharing your experience as well. Is it something that you're utilizing sort of in daily life at the moment or in your professional life? I do this too. It's called sigh breathing. There you go. You got it. You got it. You got it. You've got a dog in my profile picture called Floyd who I know nothing for it. Looks very cute. I like medium sized dogs. My favorite. Find my pets help me emotionally. But that's just me. Yeah, 100%. Like, although I think I think at some point, especially with like dogs that are really high energy. I do find it somewhat like I'm not always, I don't always have the ability to like have physical touch like such a large amount of time. I do find that sometimes animals that are very high energy and like needy. They can like set me off a little bit sometimes, I would say. I'm stuck at the routine going five to six times a week. That is cool. No, but I have a life. I mean, you can maintain that. As long as you're not going for like three hours at a time, you know, I think two and a half is where I where I cut it off for me. Any, any more than that. I'm like taking a look at myself and being like probably shouldn't probably shouldn't be here for that long. I have a day in 11 years amazing breed. Wow. He's a big dog. Isn't that great? Great Dana, I imagine. Wow. Would you say an obsession it cools off and then goes up again with Watson, but also variety helps with obsession. Both in keeping you interested and not letting it take over your life. Um, it depends what the obsession is because if it's like an obsession with content creation and autism, it's kind of somewhat good for it to semi take over my life to a certain extent. There are some things that have come into my life, which I have noticed as being like bad. And I just generally try to avoid that. Um, I mean that the variety I think is I don't think it's necessarily related to autism. I think it's just throughout my life. I've had the stuff and I like like new experiences and things and variety. But at the same time, my autistic temperament is somewhat like I like the certainty and routine. Like it makes me feel calm. Um, but when I feel able to push out my comfort zone, then I do, you know, not all the time. You know, side, side breathing is a very interesting one. I recommend trying it if you haven't already. Hello wiggly nice to see you. You have a pet pig? No way. What's it called? What are things out of your comfort zone that you do? Um, say meeting new people are trying out a different sport, trying out even like a different exercise at the gym, trying new food, um, playing a new game. Little things and sometimes big things. Uh, sometimes I do feel like I want to make like do like big sort of adventurous things, but it does come around like once in a blue moon, 100% a pet pig. Yes. Awesome. I'm curious. Do you think social changes or changes in social expectations when it comes to living with parents? Helpful with mental health, especially when autistic. Yeah, I mean, there was a lot of stuff out there which has, um, there was a lot of negative social connotations to like living with parents that a lot of people talk about, you know, criticize, make fun of, um, just in general. And I feel that this goes for a lot of online content is not necessarily geared towards like an autistic population. And I'm guilty of forgetting that sometimes as well, like solving about neurotypical expectations and even with mental health to a certain extent, you know, if your executive function is not a point where it's manageable. Um, or in my case it is manageable, but then if I have a dip, then I do need support. So it's, you know, it's one of those things. Um, and I think even when speaking about just generally people like the housing market and stuff in the UK is just like very difficult to get into. I would say, you know, so there's a lot of factors in it. And I definitely, if you are in that position, I would not feel shame about it. You know, it's, um, it's not really something that you can control, but what you can control is like making, making small steps towards that. If that's something that would make you happy and something that your parents might want as well. Can only try your hardest, you know, there's no way a pig would be counted as a pair. Pig is a pair. They're pretty intelligent, you know. Digital Cato says gotta go, but just came see, I love martial arts as you do. And I love that you put out content out there for us. No worries. Well, thank you for coming on and saying hi. Much appreciated. Thank you, Ikra for buying a badge supporting the Instagram stream. That's appreciated. Do you do martial arts? Yeah, I used to compete for Britain at a couple of events. Most notably the Commonwealth championship where I got a gold medal in Taekwondo. That's what I did. And it says, yep, for now, I'm doing my best to handle everyday struggles with executive function, but I feel like I'm about to be ready to do a public coming out in the form of a channel maybe. Let's see. Sounds very interesting. Where are the hundreds of millions of pounds supposedly spent in accordance to the 2009 autism act actually being spent? Any of them are still everywhere, even GPs? Yeah. Well, I think it's like the prescription of what information is put out there is questionable even now. So like back then, I imagine that I say back then, it's like it's not that long ago, but I haven't really read into much of like the policy sort of economic side of it. But that's why I would imagine, you know, which pieces of information and education have been pushed and what agendas, you know. I don't know if you've already been asked, but what is your daily routine? At the moment, it's very chaotic, I would say. I'm not really putting myself in the best routine, stable, certain routine at the moment. But usually I'll go to bed pretty like sit and to work quite well in the evenings. So I'll probably go to bed at like 1, 2 a.m. Usually get about eight hours sleep, do a bit of work on my phone from my bed. Get up, obviously do my videos and whatever I need to do during the day. And then I go to the gym a couple of hours. Usually I have two of my dad. I give him like a free PT session. He gives me like free food. And yeah, I do about work. And that's pretty much me for the day. I'm either working or at the gym usually. I do try and get some socializing in there. I don't need that much, but no, at least a couple of days during the week, you know, 100%. What does this stream about? Well, it's about anything to do with autism, mental health, self-improvement, fitness, personal questions, anything that you want to ask. It's like a Q&A with a green background, which is receiving no use at the moment. Also, there be shame if you want, instead of living on your own, you want to contribute to the household, like helping with expenses. Yeah, 100%. Like, you know, I don't feel any sense of shame that, you know, I still live with my parents or my mom. I definitely contribute to the bills and some of the things around the house and such. So, I mean, I think the only thing that would encourage me to, well, the reason why I'd want to sort of move out is, you know, to have my own space and that kind of thing. Yeah, but other than that, like, you know, I'm just trying to get myself nice and stable both monetarily and mental health wise. It can be a fine balance. I don't want to be putting myself into the deep end if it's going to impact me negatively. So, you know, it's still on the way to that. But green is nice. It's true. Thanks for sharing. No worries. Wendy, did you decide to say that you were autistic? What things change with people around you? I was diagnosed when I was 10 years old. So, I used to say that I was autistic. Secondary school didn't. University, when I started listening to other autistic people talk about their experiences, watch YouTube videos and more or less get into the world of autism. That's when I kind of decided that, you know, I feel comfortable myself and it just kind of comes up as naturally a conversation and people ask me what I do. I'm like, I do autism stuff. I don't say that, but, you know, people decided for me that I was autistic as soon as I was diagnosed at secondary elementary school. May I ask, have you received any hate messages or trolls by sharing your thoughts, experiences and opinions? Yeah, 100%. Like, I mean, you just get the regular stuff, you know, like, just general internet hate where people have watched, like, 30 seconds of your content and decided it's, they know exactly what it is. And they, you know, comment or make assumptions about my personality and who I am. Little things like that, but also, I think as well, like, I'm kind of one of those people that I'm, I mean, I think most people would say it about themselves, but I don't necessarily ascribe myself to like particular thoughts or ideas or opinions that sit within like a certain group. So if I, if I don't think similarly to the groups that I would be in, then I will obviously talk about it. You know, generally that does open me up to be somewhat trolled or criticized or called all sorts of names. But generally, I don't really get much hate from like, you know, particularly like ableist sort of language. I don't really get that. I haven't really seen much of that, to be honest. It's mostly from over autistic people generally or like autism parents. That's where I tend to get it. Would you say that people can learn martial arts on their own? You can, yeah. You won't be able to learn how to fight though. You can definitely learn how to do the things, but actual like combat is, you know, you need experience to some degree to know how to fight. But the actual forms and actual like techniques and stuff, you can learn that on your own, especially if you're autistic. Like watch some YouTube videos, try and replicate it, try and make your own program. And sure, why not? I mean, that's how I learned how to box. And then when I did like a year's worth of boxing training to our region in Sweden as a separate part of school that is just for people with ADHD. Interesting. I'm 40 and after I crashed was undiagnosed. I moved in and share a house with my parents. Yeah, I mean, if you have a good relationship with your parents, I don't see what the issue is. It only seems to be a real issue like in Western society. Like in other societies like perhaps more in the East. It's a pretty common place. People just have a lot of like social judgments on your character as a person. Even if you're doing it just because it makes you happier and you like it and your parents also enjoy having you around. It's kind of like, what is the issue? You know, after my diagnosis at 14, I thought telling people I had Asperges would be seen would be the same as saying I'm blind. I lost the social stigma around it. That is that is very true. Yeah, and if you got people and you say you're autistic. People can jump to all sorts of assumptions about what you're actually saying because of the variance and like how educated people are around it. You know, it can be it can be sometimes a difficult, difficult line to walk. And every time that you say it, you never truly sure what the other person is going to react to. React with rather, you know, I mean, I would say I would say when when it comes to like even things like dating, you know. Some people you say that you're autistic and it's kind of like, oh, that's fine. Like there's just, you know, we've got a difference, you know, I know someone who is like that and such other people just complete like they don't want to. They don't even want to like understand it or they're just like, nope. You get you got a similar sort of types of reactions from from people in all kind of circumstances, I would say. Not all circumstances, but you know, I mean, can be hard but having someone at home and help you and give you support and daily with daily things, giving you spaces great. Hmm. I mean, you definitely need to approach it like an adult, you know, you want to make sure that your parents feel. Respected to a certain degree and the support that they give you support that you give them is agreed upon. And it's, you know, you don't overstep that, I suppose. I'm autistic, but it does not make all of me. Yeah, well, it's an aspect of who you are as a human. Yeah. Exactly. Well, it's I'd say it's a pretty significant aspect, but you know, beyond autism, I am a human being. You know, 100%. So great. It's not something to be ashamed of. Yeah. So it's a quite common in Filipino society years. Near a few people met a few Filipinos when I traveled to the Philippines, of course. So chatting to them about their daily life and stuff. They they're very stoic, I would say. That was one thing that struck me. Extremely stoic and put together. Don't always forget you're a champ. Those that hate obviously help themselves imagine having all that negativity. I think some people just they like to make assumptions and like dunk on people. Right. I don't even think sometimes it's like as deep as that. They just they're so used to doing that. They're just like, oh, what's my gut reaction? Five seconds of content. What do I think? What do they look like? What do I think that they're trying to come across us? You know, so many possibilities for it. It's kind of, I mean, the way that I think about it is, you know, it's, it's like someone rolling down the window in a car like down the block and saying, oh, you're you're an idiot. You know, it's kind of like, okay, that's a bit rude. It doesn't, it doesn't necessarily like affect me. Like the things that do affect me is like people that I care about, which I think is normal. And I think not caring about what your loved ones think about you is not a good thing to a certain extent. My parents financially supported me as I've never been able to work. Many people have shamed me for this, but I able society makes it hard to support ourselves. I mean, it's, you know, it's a whether you want to categorize it as a medical or social, social kind of model disability. It is, it is a disability in the society that we're in. And what is financial support and benefits for if not to like support people who can't necessarily financially sort of support themselves. You know, you'd be hard pressed to like figure out like who is deserving of it. You know, it's no, it shouldn't definitely be no, no late shame or stigma around that. You know, people don't understand it. It kind of, I mean, specifically my experiences that people see my outward presentation, you know, as someone who has done a lot of public speaking and like podcasts and videos and you know, I try and speak like a lot of my life is speaking. They see my outward presentation of being competent in those areas. And they assume that I'm competent in other areas just equally, which is not the case. You know, I tried to that's why I tried to be honest about it as much as possible, because I don't want to lead people on to think that like, you know, I just excel in like every area of my life. You know, there are specific things which I do. But, you know, it's not, it's not like everything, I would say. I think it would be a bit misleading to say, you know, I don't know. There's some people that like sell courses and stuff and they're kind of like, my life is great. I've got every single aspect of my life pulled together all the time. Wake up at like 5am, crack a dawn. I do 30 minutes of mindfulness meditation and a gym and a 30 minute hit workout. And then I have like a specific washing and drying system that I can walk in and it does all of that for me and puts a suit and tie on me. He's got everything sorted out. They kissed their wife or their husband. Goodbye in the morning and they have quality time in the evening. It's like, okay, well, fair enough. I mean, if you can do that, go for it. But, you know, life's not as straightforward as that. You know, it's just not for the majority of us. There's a lot of different aspects and a lot of it actually that we can't necessarily control. You know, there is a heavy aspect of that and it's not good to focus on the things that we can't control. But it's definitely sensible to, I guess, tell yourself that now and again, especially when needed. Make sure to respect my parents who chose around the house. That is awesome. What's wrong with intergenerational living? 100%. What's your self-esteem like? I'd say that at this point in my life, it's pretty healthy. It definitely does fluctuate depending on external circumstances sometimes and perhaps due to internal circumstances related to mental health. But I'd say that it's pretty normal, I would say. You know. Sometimes it's better, sometimes it's bad. It's nothing to write home about, I would say. But when I was younger, it used to be pretty significantly lower all the time. That would be great, yeah. They don't see what happens afterwards and how much you prepare yourself in advance. That is very true. I don't share now, as a late diagnosed person, I've had some bad experiences with professionals. I'm sorry to hear that. Yeah. I find an adult faced with an adult autistic kind of breaks their brain ignorance again. Yeah, I mean, the most problematic thing I find with those situations where, you know, bad professionals is that they don't necessarily listen to me as a human being who has the ability to analyze and, like, perceive and process parts of my life. They see me as, like, a problem. Like, my brain's a problem, and so my suggestions aren't necessarily digested and taken into account properly. Because they know what's best, so they're like, do this, do this, do this, I'm like. Thanks, tried that, done that. That doesn't work for me. What else do you have? Well, maybe if you just put a bit more umph into it, you know. So, Jesus Christ. Oh my God. Have you watched any animation or Korean dramas? No Korean dramas, but I do love anime. It was one of the reasons why I got into doing Taekwondo when I was younger. One of my first role models, I would say. I didn't really identify with many people. There are typical individuals in the sort of celebrity arenas. I didn't really have anything like that. But anime characters, 100%. They literally don't know how to treat me, and they had to fully avoid me, and I was not good. There's a lot of judgments towards those who struggle with independence, you know. But independence can work well, 100%. I think, I feel like a lot inside of hearing people really striving for independence to a point where it becomes somewhat negative. You know, you think of perhaps like romantic relationships. You know, having some level of interdependence is important. And even if you are the most independent person out there, you are still heavily dependent on like other people through some means. Whether it be like sewer systems or like toilets. I don't know why I'm thinking of that. Clean water, food, you know. We're all one big social network. I relate when I was younger, my mood and self-esteem was awful. Mostly due to other people. Before I got into secondary school, it wasn't an issue. But you know, when people start to surpass you to a noticeable and significant degree in terms of understanding like neurotypical social communication, then it does become an issue for me being autistic. Just because of the environment, I would say. And that really does like, you struggle to make friends, you struggle to like, you know, pursue any love interests and such. Then, you know, it's going to have an effect on you. And especially like people's like social perceptions of you within the school. Just life in general, I would say. You know, sort of thin slice judgments as people call them. A very, very common thing I experience. Oh, by the way, guys, if you are liking the stream, make sure to like it. If you can, that would be great. I know some people join in like without YouTube accounts, which is cool. So good. If you can, that would be great. Would you say that you have a sweet tooth? Yeah. Yeah. Just a little bit. Not saying that I've eaten the entire box. Just a couple today. I do love sweets. It used to be pretty, pretty addicted to sugar when I was younger. It's like a coping mechanism, but it's pretty manageable at the moment. Within nine months I was diagnosed. I received financial help. I still can't believe that the system and currently in the UK is supporting people like me from the outside to look pretty normal. I feel so weird. Yeah. And there can be a lot of like imposter syndrome around that. I know quite a few autistic people in my own life who reject the idea of getting financial support because they don't feel like they deserve it. And it's kind of a fine line to walk because if you're struggling to work because you're different to other people and you can't handle it and your mental health is bad then. I think sometimes you just got to bite the bullet. The only issue with getting things like PIP, Personal Independence Payment and Benefits and such like that is you've got to really highlight and detail extensively what you struggle with and that is a really difficult thing to do. Especially if you maintain like a healthy level of self-esteem. I've been to some things like that and I felt like internally different about myself afterwards. It's not the best experience but it can be very useful. My friends didn't know until I told them. We were friends for 10 years. Wow. What do you say is helpful in a workplace or school? Less noise and light? Yeah, dinner switches. Allowing students to wear earbuds, tongue glasses, things of that nature. If they struggle with the school uniform allow them to deviate from that. Very simple things. I'd say that more of a zoomed out widespread approach that I would like to see more of is peer mediated intervention. Teaching other children about autism so that it's not so mysterious and perhaps... Some kids don't really understand the behaviour of other kids who are autistic and that can be sometimes quite worrying and scary for them and you can't really blame them because they don't really understand it. So having a little bit of that in primary school and also a lot of work around preventing bullying perhaps and discrimination in school can be... What I think is a very important thing. Thank you Mons Wiggly. Too bad I'm for the sweeter for more sweets. Thank you very much. What sweets should I get? I don't know. I felt like I've had my fill today. Maybe I might have a... I've got my chocolate Christmas calendar going at the moment. Going down at midnight just to get the next day's chocolate. I'm pretty good with it. I can somewhat stick to the designated days. Should I tell my friends I have autism? It's a hard one for me to say because my gut reaction is to say yes. I'd definitely be prepared in a sense to explain to them or at least have some resources that you can send them if you do decide to. It can be quite good because as I said some of the negative things that you might experience they might be able to help with a bit better. But then again it can go the other way depending on what your friends are like. So it's hard to say. Ideally they would know and it wouldn't be an issue. But I know what some people can be like so I don't want to say yeah go for it. I had friends but they're super stressed for too much confusion and over-stimulation. We're taking this help and post-syndrome looks to digest me to accept about myself and this label. I was 40 years struggling alone. I'm sorry to hear that Anna. And us, yeah. It makes me really sad to hear that because I know what being lonely and isolated can be for like two or three years. That was like a lot for me. It sounds awful. I'm glad that you're kind of turning things around. Sort of making some changes and stuff. It's good to hear. Even if it's just about like your perspectives on things it's, you know, being kind to yourself is super important. Totally agree Ari other people. It's very problematic saying this. It's the result of us not taking responsibility. I do have issues with family of origin but not with progressive friends. Hello, Kingdell Clark and Antonio. I don't know why I said it in that accent. Antonio. You probably an awful lot of really interesting questions. Spokes write draw. I much appreciate it. Austin says my friends predicted I was autistic before I was officially diagnosed. Yeah, friends can be good in that way I suppose. In some respects if they're doing it in a nice way I guess. I mean this stigma is definitely one of the biggest barriers to people pursuing something like that. It's not got the best social stigma attached to it I would say. Do you think you need to be independent of any negative connotations depending on anyone? I'm not sure I know what you mean. I feel my executive function is pretty affected since two years ago. I was diagnosed with autism four months ago. I wondered if autism could cause such impairment in the executive function. 100%. Yeah, it can. I mean it's usually kind of from what I've seen. It's usually associated with ADHD and a lot of stuff that I've seen. But it is very common with autistic people too. 100%. Also that with like a like sub-Immur is another thing that's quite common for us autismies. Can definitely impact like decision making and sort of in the moment sort of. Also like when it comes to like regulating yourself sometimes. If you struggle to like notice how you're feeling. You might be a little bit late in terms of like implementing some regulation. Also time like you get into like a state of autistic inertia and hyper focus. You know obviously that's gonna like if you really focused on all that stuff. You know everything else in your brain is just like the window. If you can get that kind of support just take it. You might just need it for a while to all your stronger and you build yourself a new foundation. Exactly. Like you don't have to like the benefits and the financial support. It's not necessarily like. If you feel strongly like you want to like support yourself and you can and you do have the ability to. And it's you know and it will just be like a. Sort of a transitional thing like nothing wrong with having that just to get you on your feet and. Reduce anxiety allow you to like focus on stuff and come at things in a more stable state of mind. Then others yeah I mean why not like if it's going to help you. What's your favorite sweet. I like the old school jelly belly beans. You know like the classic ones I see a lot of the gourmet ones around. Not to too much of a fan of the gourmet ones but the like original ones you get like a pick and mix like scoop. You can like fill up like a jelly bean thing. Beautiful. Every recently got new friends and I don't know if I should tell them should I again like not too sure. Depends on your friends. There is always a possibility that when you tell people people have a negative reaction to it. It's just and there is also a possibility when you tell people that people will be like oh that makes sense. Like I have never thought about that or yeah I actually did think that you were a little bit different. You just got to be prepared for the mixed bag of reactions that you can get and you can't always tell. And it's just you know part of the fact of you know you accept yourself you feel okay by yourself first. You know confident yourself in the right to self advocate and be who you are. That kind of stuff it becomes a little bit easier to move past if it people have negative reactions because it's a little bit more ingrained in yourself you know you feel more confident about yourself cat person or dog person. I used to be heavily like not liking cats but I've only had really bad experiences with them. There was this one cat in Thailand that I used to train with the Thai team when I was in Thailand obviously. And at the end of each session I would sit down to do my stretches and there was always this one cat that came up to me after the session and just like sat in between my legs while I was doing the box splits. And it was a wonderful cat and that cat changed my perception. Thanks for clarifying I actually have ADHD and autism. Yeah it's one of those things isn't it? It's like there's a lot of crossovers between the two and you know sometimes it's hard to like separate the two out when there's so much crossover. I'm going to show my friends your recent post also my fan because they don't understand meltdown sometimes. Yeah that's a big one. Especially if people don't understand like the reactions that people can have and like the personality traits that they attribute to you after having a meltdown. I can very much like shift the dynamic in like particular social relationships which is not the best. I mean for me I've experienced a lot of like shame over it and stuff when I've had them in public. A little bit more okay about it now but you know people make judgments. You can try as much as you can to not let other people's judgments around you affect you but you do you know it's just natural. Being in a state where you can't control yourself as much and perhaps a little bit more vulnerable you're just going to kind of feel that sense I suppose. It'd be nice if we didn't. Yeah. Stereotypical. You don't look autistic. Again for a diagnosis at the moment it's hard. I thought it'd be straightforward but it's not. Sometimes my family thinks I'm crazy for having meltdowns but they don't understand. Yeah and there's a lot of women who particularly women who get misdiagnosed like BPD or other sort of personality related disorders. Particularly because of that. Like I say oh you've got an anger issue. You're crazy. You've got schizophrenia. They have those kind of assumptions I suppose. Not to use crazy in a drug or two way. Vulnerable individuals and society should always be supported shouldn't even be a discussion. Yeah. Yeah it's true. Got disability after several burnouts and a couple of breakdowns. Could no longer work. Yeah. I've had a few experiences like that. Antonio asks would it be okay to feel annoyed if you mention it to someone and they're just like I totally believe it. It depends if they're being condescending. Well I know you. I guess so maybe. I mean it's definitely not like the worst response that you can get in the world. What about lonely travelling to totally different countries? I've been alone a few months in Peru. Now it feels like a different person so much stimulation there. Sometimes they need to go somewhere far. Yeah I mean Thailand. Living in Thailand was kind of like that for me. I think one thing that living abroad taught me is that the way that society is in like the place that I live or the country that I live is like the social rules and things of that nature. They're not consistent everywhere in the world. There's some things about British society that I like and some things about Thai society that I like and the same like negatives perhaps. It's just kind of realising that there's a lot of different variation in the social worlds of different countries and cultures. And some cultures actually like a lot more of their social rules and social normative values are like pretty in keeping with autism. I imagine that like the diagnosis rate is going to be a little bit less common in those countries. BPD and autism can look very similar on the surface. There's a significant current, yeah, 100%. They just miss meltdowns as tantrums, yeah. How often do you experience meltdowns and shutdowns? I'd say probably about 20% of the time in a social situation or a new place. Just in general, not too much at the moment, but it's very tied to my levels of anxiety just generally. So recently, actually I've been pretty good when it comes to like implementing breaks and sort of relaxation stuff. So it's not been too bad. I think it's been like a few months since I've had one, which is good for me. Sometimes I feel like I have to be a people pleaser for everyone just to be accepted. Yeah, I get that feeling as well. I mean, masking in general is very kind of people pleasery, I would say. Just to a certain extent, depends what you use it for, of course, but you know, if you're using it to like avoid negative situations, it's not like that. But it's, you know, shifting your behavior in order to be more socially accepted like evil, hiding your artistic traits, you know, maybe. Well, guys, I'm probably going to have to sign off for tonight. It's been really, really fun. I'm going to go do something with one of my friends. I'm going to go for like a joint workout, which should be good. Going to do an upper body day. Did likes yesterday, which went pretty well actually actually enjoyed it, which is weird. But really, really great questions guys. Thank you to books rights draw specifically for the amazing questions. And also to Mr. Joshua G for the hydration reminders and all you lovely people for asking questions and being so nice and great as usual. And thank you to Mums Wiggly and Austin Henshaw for the support and Iqra, of course. And I'll hopefully see you next week. Friday. If you're an Insta, go check out my YouTube stuff. If you're on YouTube, go check out my Insta stuff. Alrighty. Yeah, I'm jealous you have such nice skin. I use Dematica, the company Dematica for like the Tretino and stuff. This is preventative like skincare if you're interested. All right. See you guys later. Merry, Merry Christmas here. Well, I probably do a live stream closer to Christmas day. So maybe wait, actually what? What is next week? Yeah. Yeah. 20 seconds. I'll do one. All right, guys. Take care. See you later. Bye guys.