 There was a man by the name of Ali ibn Abi Hamza. Who wanted to meet the seventh holy Imam, Imam Musa ibn Ja'far in Al-Qadim, Salawatullahi wa Salamu alayhi. Imam Al-Qadim knew that this man wanted to meet him during the Hajj pilgrimage. And he said to somebody that, look, tomorrow somebody will ask you, where is Musa ibn Ja'far? Bring him to me. The next day, this Ali ibn Abi Hamza was indeed brought to the Imam, exactly as the Imam said. When he was brought to the Imam, Imam alayhi salam said to him that because of what you have just done, the severing of the relations and the creating of the problems with your own family members, your brother will pass away, or indeed has passed away. By the time you come back from the Hajj, you'll see that he's no longer alive. And this man was very much taken back by this because he realized the Imam alayhi salam has knowledge which other people do not. He asked him, what about myself? I'm also part of this issue. He said, well, because you look after an aunt of yours and you visit her on a regular basis, then your life has been prolonged and Allah SWT has safeguarded you. This story is one that highlights the importance that the Ahl al-Bayt, alayhum salam, emphasized upon when it comes to Salat al-Raham in joining blood relations or relatives as far as their well-being and relationship with them is concerned. Allah SWT in the Holy Quran in numerous instances highlights the importance of Salat al-Raham in joining good relations with the family and relatives. In Surat al-Rahad verse 21, says, those who keep strong and tie the bonds that the Almighty SWT wants it to be strengthened. Narrates and says that the Holy Prophet Muhammad SAW has said, I want the present to pass on the message to the ones who are not present. And I'm giving this message to those who are in the loins of men and in the wombs of the mothers until the day of judgment. So not even, it's powerful, it is to reach everyone. And you must, the Prophet of Islam says, ensure that your relationship with your family members is good and that you put the effort and invest time and commitment. Even if that individual from your family member is so far away from you that you have to walk or at least travel for about a year. This is in Al-Kafi Sharif volume one. Likewise, the Quran comes forward and says, Fear Allah, be God conscious in terms of your relationship with your blood relatives or family members. Generally, why? The religion of Islam does not view society as individualistic excellence or individualistic development, but rather collectively it's very important that there is a good relationship. There's harmony. There is synchronization as far as people's love and respect towards each other. And positive, cohesive, good relationship is sought for in a society, in a community, and definitely results in an increasing in love and stronger bonds between the believers. Looking after the kingsfolk, therefore, was an important virtue that the Ahl al-Bayt, alaykum as-salam, emphasized upon in numerous occasions the Imam, alaykum as-salam, Imam al-sadaq, salawatullah, alaykum as-salam, alaykum says, in a narration from Al-Bihar volume 71 that the man will not reach mercy, and he has remained for three years, that the human being sometimes enjoys good relations with their family members. And there's only three years left in the lifespan, because remember Allah SWT sets the lifespan for the human being, but there is a lifespan which can be changed. There's a lifespan that can increase and one that can decrease. And Imam says by doing that, if they've got three years, Allah SWT moves it to 30 years. They might sever the relationship with the family and they've got 30 years left, Allah will change it to three years. And this is very important, similar to the story of Ali ibn Abi Hamza, that one of the features about Salat al-Rahim is that it impacts the lifespan of the human being, and that's something to keep in consideration. There's no doubt, of course, above all, it's obedience to Allah SWT, and that should give assurance that it's the right thing to do. Today, if I'm thinking about enjoying good relations with my family members, one of the most important inspiration and motivation should be that the Almighty has commanded this to be done, and the Ahlul Bayt, alaykum has acted upon it as my role models, I should indeed follow in the footsteps. The other benefits are that they effort to enjoy good relations with the family, indeed, lessens the painfulness and the difficulty at the time of death. Imam al-Sadaq, alaykum says, effort to enjoy good relations with the family, indeed, lessens the painfulness and the difficulty at the time of death. Imam al-Sadaq, alaykum says, whomsoever the Imam says, according to the narration, once Allah SWT lessened the impact of the sakaratul-mout of the excruciating pain and the suffering at the time of death of the extraction of the soul from the body, let them be kind and generous and treat their family well as well as their parents. What it also does, of course, is it protects wealth and property. The Holy Prophet of Islam, peace and blessings be upon him, and his holy progeny says, even if the people are not righteous, even if the people are not necessarily believers as such unless one feels for their own faith or by supporting them, they are helping them in the spreading of anti-Muslim statements, that's something else. But by and large, if they're just not necessarily good people, but suffering of the relationship is not something that we should be somehow supporting or looking to actually do. And the consequences of suffering the relationship in the Quran are quite strong. Allah SWT in Surah Muhammad verse 22 says, Do you think that you can spread corruption on the earth and sever the relationship with your family members? They are the ones who are the recipients of the lana with the Almighty SWT, the Almighty withdraws his mercy from them. A man came to the Holy Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, and said, what are kind of actions are detested by the Almighty SWT? The Prophet of Islam says, polytheism. After that, he said to deliberately sever and stop the relationship with family members. This is Ousul Al-Kafi volume 2 page 151. He says thereafter is to enjoin evil and to forbid the good is detested by the Almighty SWT. Three times would say, the one who does this deliberately is indeed the recipient of the withdrawing of the mercy of the Almighty SWT. Once he had a family member who would constantly be complaining about Imam Zayn al-Abideen that he does not do enough and so on and so forth. Whereas on a continuous basis Imam at night would bring him food, would help him, would support him without revealing who Imam al-Salam was. And after the martyrdom of Imam Zayn al-Abideen, this family member of the Imam, perhaps a distant family member, recognized it was Zayn al-Abideen, it was Ali Ibn al-Husayn and felt incredibly remorseful that all these years or this period of time he's been critical of the same person who has invested so much in the support and in the help of this particular person. So what is needed today is to look at the example of the Ahl al-Bait al-Alihim al-Salam and to follow in their footsteps in regards to making sure that we sacrifice whatever we can in the strengthening of the bond that exists within the families. Unfortunately what we are finding in this day and age is that the marriages in certain family setups are being split and are being affected by this issue, you know, bickering, backstabbing, backbiting slander between family members and therefore it's weakening the marital relationship between the husband and wife. If people are in business with their family members, sometimes there's a lack of trust, sometimes there's betrayal, disloyalty and then thereafter there's very little forgiveness that is happening out there, too much seeking of vengeance and revenge and people taking each other to court and so on and so forth. Of course in some instances one is needing to do that to recuperate the losses but the spirit of understanding the dealing with the family members is slowly being lost and sometimes even religious dispute amongst the family members can lead to some kind of God forbid hatred or animosity or the dislike between them and the criticism and the backbiting that sometimes can actually happen is one that needs to be reminded as as believers to be careful from falling into that particular trap of the shaitan. What is really crucial is if for example a family member has upset us or has taken our rights away then we try our best to exercise forgiveness and to be patient with them and if they've asked for forgiveness to forgive them too sometimes we deal with cases where people have said I've gone to this particular family member or this relative and I've said look I've wronged you please forgive me and they refuse to do so and sometimes shaitan comes to our minds and says why should I forgive you have hurt me in such a way you have done in you've committed this particular act against me and I don't want to forgive. Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says chapter 24 verse 22 these are clear of Quranic verses let them forgive and to indeed look away from the action. Do you not want God the Almighty himself to indeed forgive us is not not something that we are looking for? Chapter 2 verse 237 the prophet of Islam says to somebody shall I tell you what is the best of this world and Akhirah? What is makarimu l-akhlaq in another generation? Al-afwa amman zalamak to be forgiving of the one who has oppressed us. If we find sometimes that our family members or relatives have stopped their relationship with us we instigate it, we make it happen, we use chances like the month of Ramadhan, Ashura, Arabain, Hajj time for example, Eid these are occasions in which we can look to our family members and reignite the relationship and keep the bond or at least re-establish the bond. So a high degree on status of Akhlaq from the Ahl al-Bayt is to re-establish the relationship even if somebody himself has severed it. And to do good for that towards that individual who has necessarily wronged. Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala says la tas-tawil hasanatu wa la sayyia itfa' billatihi ahsan. The good and the bad are not the same go with that which is better in the eyes of Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala. If somebody's wronged us well we can wrong them back but that's not necessarily going to achieve much. It's not good for our spiritual development, it's not going to bring us thawab and it may make the situation worse. The Prophet of Islam encourages us to do that which is right, which is to reciprocate the bad with good. Wa i'ata'u man haramak this is an bihar to give that which necessarily has forbidden you from getting. So for example sometimes you might have asked somebody and they themselves have been reluctant to help you or support you a family friend or a member family and now you have an opposition to help them as well. Then we should be looking to assist and this sometimes is a battle within ourselves. Shaytan wants personal satisfaction, ego-centric thinking why should I you know they've hurt me let me help them this sense of revenge and then data and things like that. Shaytan wants us to strengthen ourselves in that area whereas the Quranic teachings as applied by the Prophet and the Ahlul Bayt want us to break those idols that exist within us and we will indeed become stronger individuals if we lift ourselves to do that which is pleasing to the Almighty Subhanahu wa ta'ala. An important feature of Salat al Raham is that we should be looking to support our family members and our relatives as far as assistance and charity and financial help is concerned meaning that if we have family members who are in need if we have family members who are looking for some kind of assistance and help they come first. They should be ones who are looked at first and assisted and helped first before we look at others sadly what we find today is that sometimes even after a person has passed away like for example a father or an uncle has a dispute which sometimes turns ugly between the sons between the inheritors and they are you know fighting each other over money fighting each other over belongings and possession. The shaitan can get between them and you know plant the seeds of discord and hatred and jealousy and envy between them. Look at what the shaitan did as far as the uh the the brothers of Yusuf alaihi salam is concerned look at how he came to them and said look you know your brother is more beloved to your father than you are why don't you get rid of him and that satanic thought developed and developed even further that they wanted to kill Yusuf alaihi salam so one of them said don't kill him place him in a well that those feelings can if they're not treated and if they're not looked at with careful consideration can sometimes lead the human being even to commit other acts which are hugely problematic and may god forbid result in consequences which Allah swt doesn't want us ourselves to fall into we should not necessarily be influenced in society as well by those around us in terms of the negative traits if people around us i remember seeing that the individuals some individuals non-believers they have not spoken to their father or parents for how many years god knows how many years and sometimes what happens is that it's sad that in our own communities in different parts of the world within the shia communities with the Muslim community you hear of people uncles cousins brothers and sisters years have not even spoken with each other why is that the case is it something that serious why isn't there be attempts of course if we have tried and we have failed and we should continue to try and Allah swt maybe one day will soften the hearts of the people who may be affected or somehow angered by certain actions but we should not give up we should certainly continuously strive and not necessarily be influenced by people who don't want us to create a cohesive state of a relationship between our family members as advised as encouraged as practiced by the Ahlul Bayt alayhum salam the glorious family of the holy prophet peace and blessings be upon them sought at every opportunity when it comes to family members to keep the passion and the the relationship as far as family members are concerned alive and to ensure that that model remains vividly within the practice and when the thoughts of people by enlarge now what we have to do is have a plan have a carefully orchestrated and designed system of initiative or objective in restoring back relationships how does this happen well the Quran tells us that it is permissible for example if it comes to Islam that will be in terms of the Salat al-Rahm if we look for the idea of even telling somebody that that person loves you so much even if it's not true that the so-called distortion of the truth is permissible in this regard so if I need to make two people speak again or visit each other again I can go to each other and say to them that look he desires to get closer to you or get back the relationship better things highly of you that is good that is recommended to that extent that Islamic teachings encourage us to focus to put our efforts to invest whatever we can to maintain the good relationship within the family setup as much as possible at all the different levels infusing patience forgiveness dedication even sometimes generosity acts of generosity can assist even sometimes generosity can enhance a relationship between people and the other feature that we have to understand and appreciate is that words may hurt words may be too powerful sometimes even in today modern day there are tools to communicate so we have to be very careful and when it comes to our family members our relatives as well as others of course but whilst we're talking about Salat al-Rahman and joining good relations we have to understand that our way of communication with others requires us to use the right terminology the prophet of Islam Rasul Allah Muhammad that you know when you communicate with others it's like the water that we place for plants if too much water is placed on the plant then it dies likewise if we use too much words or we use the wrong words then it may have adverse impacts we pray to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to strengthen our family relationships to help us spread and strength and keep the spirit of Salat al-Rahman and for those who have severed or have weaker relationships for them to restore those relationships as inspired by the Ahlul Bayt alaykum as-salam wa khairu da'wana al-hamdu lillahi rabbil alameen wa sallallahu ala Muhammad wa aalihi al-taybeen al-taheri