 Your Coca-Cola bottler presents, Claudia, based on the famous play and novels by Rose Frankin Brought to you transcribed Monday through Friday by your friendly neighbor who bottles Coca-Cola Relax and while you're listening refresh yourself. Have a coke and now Claudia Stop shouting you wake up the dead. Mama. Do you hear us? We're home. Say hooray Your daughter wants a herald to announce her arrival Red carpet close the door What's matter with your closing the door my arms are full of packages. That's what's the matter with me closing the door. Oh So they are Hey, David, don't go in the living room. You go right upstairs with all that stuff. It belongs upstairs Well, I'm going into the living room whether this stuff belongs here upstairs I can't walk another step without dropping David what do you have there packages? So I see one two three four 11 no wonder you're so late. Don't you got lost? I had a flat tire or something Hello mama. What time is it past nine already? My doesn't seem possible feels like midnight to me 11 separate packages. What did you do buy out the whole town of Eastbrook? Of course not all I needed was a toothbrush and I didn't really need that except as an excuse to go out Your daughter mrs. Brown will be the end of me shouldn't be surprised She's almost been the end of me on a number of occasions. You see these 11 packages each wrapped individually had more fun mama I'm listening to David my own mother. Go on David. I've cleared the floor for you. Thank you, ma'am Are these 11 packages mrs. Brown each wrapped individually are Claudia's purchases her idea of an evening's entertainment It was your fault David my fault. You're the one to discover the cut rate drugstore I didn't discover it you did you were driving the car right down that block You're not even supposed to drive yet. I've half a mind a car cut rate drugstore I didn't even know there was one in the village. Did you I'm sorry you found out what cut rate drugstore The one where we bought all this stuff, of course instead of only a toothbrush where in Eastbrook, of course You didn't think we go gallivanting all around the state of Connecticut for just a toothbrush did your mama rescue me David Well mama, you know where the little library is and there's a little road that goes off to the left there beyond it Yeah, and now that road takes you to the farmer's market. Yes Well, that's not the road you take. Oh dear you too now But the next little road that goes off to the right goes on past sunflower nursery. Yes You don't take that one either No, you take the next one on the right you drive down it and pass the gas station past the soda shop and past the shoemaker There it is Right there the cut rate drugstore. I never saw it. I didn't know it existed I lost my head. Glad you said ahead not mine What are you doing going down that little street that turns off the right beyond the little street that turns to the left Beyond the town library. We were driving David was in spite of he shouldn't and then my explorers blood Started boiling. There was the street and there was I was inevitable. I should drive down it It was as if it had burst out of a pumpkin like a a Walt Disney cartoon just for us the little street That wasn't there David you think it'll be there for you look tomorrow. I'm not going to look tomorrow I'm never going to look again. I've been burnt once where's my pipe Speaking of being burnt now if anybody's going to put my pipe someplace where I can't why does somebody have to always move My pipe around as if it's on the mantle dear No So it is Well, she has me so bewildered mama I can't find the nose on my face and there it is right between your eyes and over your mouth in the middle of your face Bring me up to date. What happened? What happened mama? What are all these 11 packages drugs from the cut rate drugstore? Of course, it's open all night until 1 o'clock a useless piece of information Your daughter mrs. Brown dragged me out of this house an hour ago Ostensibly to buy a toothbrush pretty flimsy excuse. Yeah, so I thought it's a crime But in this day and age a girl has to even think up an excuse to get a husband to go driving We're underneath the moonlit sky. I knew that toothbrush was an excuse all along or else I wouldn't have consented in the first place. You did I certainly did then you just went because you wanted to nice early dead sweet Then why did you insist that we go to the drugstore to catch you with your own tricks young woman? But my plot boomerang so I see we had no sooner stepped in that drugstore mother Then I knew the trick was on me and the jig was up sit down party. I left David talk Hmm, I don't think you would too were in a cut rate drugstore at all I think you were in a tavern having something to drink say that's an idea I feel just like a glass of milk. I had to go and open my mouth as I was saying mrs. Brown Your daughter found heaven Cut rate was heaven Everything in that drugstore was reduced Toothpaste it sells for 25 cents for selling for 17 and cold cream 27 cents to for 41 There you have enough toothpaste in this house to last you till next year. I know but I couldn't resist It was a bargain. I could easily spend a fortune in that drugstore. No, you did you spent a dollar and twenty-nine cents Well, it was worth three times that Mama, I'll have to take you there sometime. You'll have a gorgeous time. Yes, but why each bundle wrapped individually Because I bought each one individually. Can't you imagine the picture mother? Now? She saw a bar of soap Seven cents. She told the man behind the counter. You look like a tax collector. So he did Where was I the bar of soap? Oh, yeah, seven cents only it was six reduced in 12 quiet Now Claudia decided to buy a bar of soap That was the first step make it sound so exciting. She told the man behind the counter He wore glasses a little bit ball just a little beginning in the middle Claudia told the man behind the counter to wrap it up, please David give the man six cents, which I did and He wrapped the package Whereupon I took Claudia by the arm. I said young woman. We're going home But on the way her eye was caught by a sign which read cold cream 27 cents selling two for 41 So she told the man behind the car. He was wearing a gray suit and no time She told the man behind the counter wrap it up David give the nice man 41 cents 11 times a nice man wrapped up things and 11 times I paid the nice man Never again. I shall never be lured out of this house with the pretext of purchasing one toothbrush Which we never bought. Well, they weren't reduced. This is too much I'm going to bed. I always think I've learned my lesson David, but I guess I'm too old to learn That's a fine way to talk for a spring chicken spring chicken or no. I'm going to bed. So am I David All right. I know when I'm like go to bed, too You must be tired. No not so tired as worn out But I have to get up early in the morning, so I might as well go to bed I know I won't be given any peace until I do. He's so flattering mama. Good night I'm right behind you David Aren't you going to carry up all these packages? I am not they're yours. I can't carry 11 packages. Well, I did Well, you're bigger than I am. I'm not supposed to carry things. I broke a collarbone a month ago remember Oh, no, you remember. You're just lucky. I didn't remember sooner. All right. I'll show you I'll carry them myself Chivalry is dead Hard to believe that men ever treated women as if they were the weaker sex which they aren't of course To be the way they're treated Having trouble I'm not talking to you You think you're so smart All right, I'll uh, I'll give you a hand. I don't need your help. Not much. You don't hear hold out your arm Suppose I'm gonna have to be indebted to you for this for the rest of my life You will there then I will carry them myself. I stand still don't talk so much big bully Now There That's all of them now March I'll put out the lights behind you. You're a big help Now do you want to put out the lights by yourself? I didn't say anything Careful you uh, you don't trip on the stairs making a woman carry your own bundles. You think we were in the middle of china I'll uh I'll turn out the turn on the light in the bedroom for you. Don't strain yourself. Oh, I won't I won't forget this very quickly. I hope you won't Ah, there we are Now give me the packages There glad them now. I'll put all this stuff in the bathroom cabinet No, I think we need an extra blanket tonight Now with ever there was an evening wasted. This was it How can you say that when we save so much money? Just how do you figure we save money? Simple we only spent a dollar 29 right and the stuff we bought was with at least three dollars only two dollars Please please please don't exaggerate. All right. All right only two. We still save money How you women can always get yourself to figure that way. I'll I'll never know You think you save money when you've bought something that you don't need because it happens to be reduced Well, we we might need some of this stuff someday Someday you might need the moon too. I think we'll need this stuff sooner than that They're very good things to have handy. That's gauze adhesive tape with chasel I had on you never know when you're going to need that sheer rationalization But if you had a good time darling, it was worth it and lots more I wonder who that is Claudia are you still up? Come on in buddy I'm sorry for disturbing you. You're not disturbing us. He means seem to have cut my finger Where is a bad shot to me get away from me? It's just a little cut. Mama. How'd you do it? Is it hurt? Hey, it's bleeding blood. Of course. It's bleeding blood. It's cut. I said, oh dear I haven't got turning juice in my veins. This is no time for jokes. Claudia shut up Is she all right to me mother? It's nothing David just a scratch on my finger How'd you do it mom? I'd chip the glass if you must know Plumsy. I admit it very clumsy Now David, what are you looking so serious about? Here, let me wipe it off a little bit Just a slight cut mother. It doesn't seem to be any glass, any I didn't need you to tell me that. Then why'd you come in here? Some adhesive tape and gauze if you please Adhesive tape and gauze. Did you say you have some? Have some mama. They are just waiting for you That's good And how very very thoughtful of you mrs. Brown to go and cut your finger just when claudia gets her adhesive tape and gauze David isn't there wonderful? I must be psychic. Yes, I must be We can use all these things. I just bought When lunchtime comes do you make it a habit to snatch a hasty bite from the icebox? That as you know is not a good idea Instead take the time to sit down quietly for a half hour and include a bottle of ice cold coca-cola with your meal Your afternoon will go better after you lunch refresh A mrs. Brown Could I ask you something? Yes, mr. K About that finger of yours. Yes um Tell me mrs. Brown Did you cut it on purpose? What do you think? Well, you know, I know you pretty well after all these months I wouldn't put it past you That's a compliment Not gonna tell me are you? No, I don't think I am. Well, I'm very hurt. Don't be but look at this bandage Don't you think david's talented as a doctor? I find these talented are just about everything and so is claudia What a talented family. Oh, wonderful. That's uh as professional a bandage as I've even seen dr. Barry himself put on Oh, that reminds me. He's visiting us tomorrow. I'm looking forward to it. He's a wonderful old guy Isn't he with such a wonderful philosophy of life? Well, it's time for bed. Good night, Joe. Good night, mrs. Brown. Take care of that finger Well, as I was about to say every day monday through friday claudia comes to you transcribed with the best wishes of your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola So listen again tomorrow at the same time And now this is joe king saying au revoir And remember whoever you are whatever you do wherever you may be When you think of refreshment think of coca-cola For coca-cola makes any pause the pause that refreshes and ice cold coca-cola is everywhere This broadcast of claudia was supervised and directed by william brown maloney And now here's a word from your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola