 I am trying to inhabit a masculinity that does not need to impose. One of the neglected masculine qualities is patience. In our distorted society, patience seems like a feminine quality, but it's actually a masculine quality. And I'm sure there's a feminine version of patience too. But this goes to some work by Genia Haddon, where she identifies a masculine yin and a masculine yang, and a feminine yin and a feminine yang. The feminine yin is receptivity and even passivity. And we're all familiar with that. That's the kind of femininity that is validated by the culture. And the masculine yang is assertive. And so these have anatomical dimensions. So the masculine yang is assertive and wants to break through barriers and forge into new territory and is linear and ascending and onward and upward and forward. That's the masculine yang. And the feminine yin is receptive and accepting and nurturing and all-encompassing. So it neglects the feminine yang, which is the menstruating or birthing womb, which is impatient and wants to move on from this and is pushy and demanding. That's a feminine yang. Whereas the masculine yin is the testicular yin, which is all about conserving and patience and undergirding and there's a gentleness. So these are neglected masculine qualities. And maybe that's one partial answer to the question of what might a new masculinity look like. It's not one that has abandoned the assertive, forward-moving, enterprising masculine yang, but it also accepts the masculine yin. And in the absence of the masculine yin, men can only turn to the feminine yin for balance. So they become wimpy, passive, and feminized when what they're really looking for is the masculine yin. So they become passive instead of patient. And women then the same thing happens. In order to find balance, they need to have a yang expression. And here's the masculine yang, which is offered to them. So they become aggressive and dominating and imposing and projecting when what they really want is the feminine yang. So anyway, there's a way, way more to it. I might have oversimplified it a bit, but I can't remember how I got there. Patience is a masculine quality. Yeah. So if you're asking me what would I say to so-and-so, what would I say to so-and-so, I would, yeah, I would really begin the conversation by listening. And maybe after doing that, I would assert something. And maybe I wouldn't. Maybe it wouldn't be invited. That's another dimension of this whole dance of the genders. The real initiation happens from the feminine. The masculine responds to it. And the whole apparatus of consent becomes necessary when the masculine has lost the sensitivity. So it's a necessary fallback in current circumstances. But in a really healthy society, you would rarely need to ask for consent. And maybe sometimes you get it wrong and you need to be told no. And that would need to be respected. But we are in a remedial place right now.