 I can look at the human being in front of me and see the effect of the relationship on him or her and if it's deleterious, if this person's personality has been fractured and their confidence is wounded, so your will to life, your will to thrive actually breaks. This is not good. So look at how interacting with that person makes you feel. If it makes you feel like shit, it's probably not good for you. If it makes you feel really, really super excited and through the roof, it's probably not going to be that good for you in the long run. Be realistic. You're an adult. If you're in a long-term relationship and you're talking love and marriage, you don't want it to be a rollercoaster. It's like how are you going to do 30 years of rollercoaster? You're fucking crazy in the end.