 Standard of California on behalf of independent chevron gas stations and standard stations throughout the west Invite you to let George do it The Empress of Fish Falls another adventure of George Valentine personal notice dangerous my stock and trade If life's crowding into a corner, and you can't find your way out. You got a job for me George Valentine write full details Dear mr. Valentine, I am a man who hears voices No matter where I am I always hear things, but it's always voices yesterday my fortune teller told me oh Violet Bruxy Overboard yes, but George there are some more letters and and there's a lot of important mail here. I'm sure oh yeah I'm sure I'm sure too. Everybody sure Boy, did you see that fish three and a half pounds if he was announced? Hey, come on give yours a full rally Never mind the rest books and throw them over board. Why don't you throw miss Brooks overboard? It's bad luck women in books. Oh, it is is it? Well, why don't you try putting a worm on that hook lieutenant? Look, we're doing the fishing angel. This is our vacation Not sure well, that's what makes me so mad sitting back there in the hot city But I knew you want to see your mail George. I knew it was too important to wait and I thought oh, yeah Sure sure you travel 500 miles for a man with three wives But listen to this one George listen to this dear mr. Valentine your name has been given to us as a likely prospect for the fruit of the month At least now that I'm here Well, you wouldn't mind if I fished with you just for one day, would you wait a minute hold it I got some I'll swing it around the lines are tangled. Yeah. Yeah, I got some There's no fish come on pull up a little close Oh, no, oh It's the body of a little boy Yeah Only it's the first little boy. I ever saw with gray hair. Well, he That's the body of a midget Well, he hadn't been in the water very long 12 to 24 hours maybe and it's pretty clear how he got there isn't it? Yeah Been shot through the back three times How do you like that on my vacation? murder Wait, what's a midget doing in a place like this? Oh, he's getting on in years. Maybe he likes to fish too Well, I wasn't robbery. I'll tell you that huh. I didn't have a wallet or anything But he's still got his watch a beauty too. Oh, let me see. I answer go one. Hey, that's the kind that opens up on both ends Hey, let me see There we are What his name was Murrow Bender read what else it says well, it says to the greatest general manager who ever lived Murrow Bender a little bundle of three-ring showmanship Gratefully Colonel Gerald P. Fargo Fargo Fargo Circuses. Hey, I know that guy looks like our little man here was a big shot doesn't I should hope to tell you If Bender was general manager of Fargo's say Valentine we better get in touch with his boss Fargo right now Yes, sir, and you'll need a crew out here and a fingerprint man and then Yeah, yeah, this is your vacation remember well, I only meant we'd get him started that's all We're just going up there to be good citizens Oh These small towns there's a deputy sheriff lives here, but do you think I could find him? No, no, he's gone all the way to the ocean today to fish. Lieutenant. What did you do with the party? I gave it to the local saw bones cause himself coroner to I guess he's okay Except he was more worried about the emphasis cold than he was about murder the who's what how should I know? It's that kind of town Took a look at the bullet though It's out of a 32 automatic assures. I'm born and the lieutenant. What are you going to do with that bit of information? I'm going to find me your telephone and dump it on the sheriff at the county seat here. Let's let's try in here Hello, what'll it be soda cone Sunday? No, I just want some change for the phone. Yeah, I mean she got anything smaller than four bits Oh, yeah, yeah, here's quarter water. Well, it makes it better at the times of nickel plus 15 is 15 I'm only calling the county. Why don't you say so give me back the nickel is only 10 cents. Oh, yeah It's 25 now you got your change man. You're happy. I'm happy. Yeah, wait a second. Wait a second. Wait a second They're five ten. Oh Yeah, yeah, I got it all there. Thanks You didn't learn that person the walnut job in any country school, right? Yeah, you mean I've been on the hop player J Me no, I'll tell you a secret about me step a little close to miss plenty of room for one and all now Watch my nose. Just keep your eye on the nose a little freckle easy does it There's no change here You are back again now the years you just time together like this Okay, pull myself together no money in it anyway here have a coke on the house My name's rubber face just in case you didn't guess look what kind of a town is fish falls everybody from the circus No, no only 20 or 30 of us wasn't well. It wasn't any two years ago. What happened bad times bad this Oh, I've got a drugstore miss you want to see me get the kids here No, no, we're all sort of retired at least too old for the one-day stand. Oh, I get it. Oh, no, you're down We're sideshow people What's that sideshow people weirdies? It's not so easy to find a nice place to retire if you're a lady and got hair on your chin Oh, you're a man with a battle of bunker Hill painted all over you only here and fish falls you're accepted Don't kid yourself people point at other people any place you go This town was like all the rest until the Empress came along the Empress now there it is again Who in the name is the greatest little old lady since Cleopatra bit the snakes? That's who I mean and don't let anybody tell you different names Merle bender and don't interrupt lady She's got more money and she's got more class Say did you see the big castle down the river? Well, that's what hold it hold it Isn't more bender the name of a midget Midget yeah a man about 50 gray hair heavy show now now now Merle bend is the Empress Empress of fish falls a little bundle of three-ring showmanship. That's who she is What what was it you desired to discuss with the Empress that is? What did you want to hear about? About a cold watch. I I don't think the Empress would be interested in buying and I'll look once to this something She should know I just want to see that Who are these people elephant? What are you doing downstairs? Get back up there? I wanted to come downstairs elephant Go on. No, I think I'll stay downstairs for a while. Will you do what I? Excuse me, mr. Valentine. It's difficult enough being a butler and it's so fat You can't even hold a tea service, but the inhuman sausage they used to call him She expects me to work with a footman like Well, I should hope to golly. What size are they 17 triple a I'm almost eight feet tall, too. My name is elephant. So she calls him castle She does well. I'm very happy to meet you both, but look I'm in a hurry You know what this man have a contribution for the hospital What oh, oh, no, we just came and I think they better go don't you I think I'd like you better with them Hey now wait a minute lighthouse take it easy. I believe he's right for once mr. Valentine look both of you quit pushing what you're asking for a beanstalk All right, come in young man. I'll give you two minutes. Oh, thanks Thanks Empress my name is mrs. Bender. Yes, ma'am. My husband was a lion tamer. Oh, God bless him Sit down sit down. Hey, you know you're certainly hard to see mrs. Bender. Don't be insulting. I'm easy to look at Or at least I was once You're attractive my dear if you'd use just a little darker lipstick. Well, thank you, uh, but you see I know Your name is Claire Brooks and you're George Valentine Yeah, that's right Well, look, we came to tell you tell me about a midget. Yes Yeah Shorty McDonald I Knew him years ago and carnival He came here just last night His little car still out there in the garage He said he was looking for a place to settle down wanted me to help him. Did you well? I'm very busy just now collecting money for a hospital drive But of course I told him to wait to stay here. We'd find something in a few days. Well, then what happened? That's all Last evening he said he was going to take a little walk down by the river But we pulled him out of the river this morning with three bullets in but I suppose you know that too naturally Okay, do you know about the watch? Perhaps your watch the one the midget was carrying when he was killed The one Colonel Fargo must have given you when you were manager of his circuses. Oh Yeah Those were the day well How did the midget get the watch? Did he steal it? Aren't you forgetting you're on your vacation? Ah, and that man with a gorgeous temper who's with you. I suppose he has questions to ask, too Mrs. Bender. Oh, I've seen you out there on the river through my opera glasses wasting your time using spinners Mrs. Bender, there's been a murder. You think I'm not aware of it Shorty was a lovely little man. I gave him my watch to take it to town for repairs. That's all The police of this county will manage quite well without interference. Look, Mrs. Bender We only we know we appreciate what you've done most sincerely, but your two minutes are up now, Mr Valentine, I hope you catch lots of fish. Good bye. I Know I know I got the same treatment. I got the bounce to the sheriff He says he's got his orders and now he's got the case. Thank you and good night Well, the old lady seems to run this county just like she must have run Fargo's circuses with a tiger whip That's what she thinks. I got a wire in answer to the one we sent Fargo Here look Lieutenant Roddy, Fish Falls, California. I have never heard of anyone in show business by the name of Merle Bender What? Who is taking you for a sucker this time? Zined Colonel Gerald P. Fargo We'll return to tonight's adventure of George Valentine in a moment Maybe you think your car gets its rest at night same as you do But your car's engine is subject to its worst beating when your car is idle as soon as you cut the ignition acid-laden moisture Condenses starts to attack internal engine parts. The result is corrosive rust which causes 80% of engine wear But if you're using RPM motor oil, relax RPM, a premium quality oil is compounded to keep a moisture-proof film on all internal engine parts Even if your car stood idle for days or weeks, RPM's adhering agent would keep this protective film on vital parts Without this special ingredient oil couldn't do this wear-saving job. The oil would quickly drain off internal engine parts So depend on RPM motor oil, the oil that stops 80% of engine wear Ask for RPM at independent chevron gas stations and at standard stations where they say and mean we take better care of your car Now back to tonight's adventure of George Valentine You go on your vacation to catch fish only instead you pull from the river the body of a midget You meet a woman who calls herself the Empress of Fish Falls, a woman who pretends to have been a great lady of the circus A woman who tells you to peddle your papers But if you're anything like George Valentine when a real authority in the circus world wires that he's never heard of anyone by her name You begin to wonder and check around and so all you've met is the minority group the So-called freaks. Well, that's why we came to you mr. Grote You're the town banker and we thought you would know we didn't cotton to them much when they first started coming here It's a small community conservative and so on rubber face suggested that the Empress helped change that attitude Well, not directly, but of course she knew them accepted them And what would be more acceptable than a woman like her you mean because she's so wealthy Well, since the Empress has been here this county has improved itself more than in the last ten years rolled together Oh roads mobile libraries and now the hospital. You mean she contributes all the money Oh, she works her time on every committee a regular dynamo And I assure you she's offered to do a bit of underwriting anytime the county fails and it's quoted I suppose she banks with you Well now see here if she was rude to you I'm sure it was just that she's so busy this time she heads the committee one stand the position of trust Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but what we're interested in it's her job to visit the farms or to be at home to accept the money Now it's her job to see that Well, what's the matter You mean mrs. Bender is collecting money from people in the county herself That's the way it's done. It's a rural area. This is the big weekend much money. Yes. Yes indeed. Yes after all it's a hospital Mr. Grote How do you know mrs. Bender is what she seems to be? Get out of here. Yeah, all of you You're insulting a noble woman and you're insulting my judgment of character. I won't be bothered by a bunch of outsiders good day Why sure miss there's nothing I haven't done in my time as a finger. I've been a barker lumberjim I was even a rider in the man again rubber face. I suppose you knew most of the other circus people in those days Gosh, you make a good soda rubber face special for you miss always snap back for more Well, I mean the people who live here in the town now You knew them in those days didn't you know some of them the others came from foreign shows some from Connie Like that midgy got killed short of McDonald. He was a Connie. Oh, so he switched to four of them the double act But I mean I suppose you knew the Empress in those days, didn't you did I do you miss well? Drink up the soda miss Yeah, yeah, that's right. You got it and the address is just billboard magazine New York City Yeah, I'll wait Hello, mr. Valentine. Wow Hello elephant. I couldn't help hearing if that is noticing Friends on billboard gets you good publicity and show business. I never been doing following me Of course, maybe you don't have friends. Maybe you're just asking billboard for information about people. It's a free country I really doubt if you do have many friends prying like that. Why don't you cut the double talk? I never got good publicity even if I was one of the heaviest in the person on class Look at those hands mr. Valentine like loaves of bread. Yeah, you look at him It's a funny thing about fat men though. They move fast a minute. Take your hands away from me Too close to him to mr. Valentine. You won't try anymore. Will you hey my stomach? Stop squeezing cut it out crazy man. Cut it out. You'll be all right, mr. Valentine You'll find you here in the alley. You'll be all right, but you won't lie. Will you? There's a hospital drive going on. You'll leave us all alone Yes, mr. Valentine Course you will well, I guess now you'll buy something's wrong in Denmark. Won't you even from an outsider? I don't know what the fat man might have to try to drink this water George. No, no, I'm okay I'm all right. Yeah, sure like bologna in a meat press just Squeeze me around the stomach till I passed out Yeah, I'll take that one. I've known her for some time lieutenant. I trust it Well, you can ask to see the hospital money catcher. No one else would know she has it there at the house. I Suppose they think it's in my bank already the early contributions are I I always felt there was no danger her two men there Mr. Grove you wouldn't look well holding a sack The sheriff will be back here soon, but Yes, yes, yes, how good well, that's more like it Valentine you able to travel. Yeah, rally a miles ahead of you. Let's go I think this is Grand Central Station. I tried to keep them out All right, all right Castle just what is the story to come barge in on you like this mrs. Benderby Yes, but there's a little matter of money involved Well, speak your peace banker why mr. Groot. I I didn't know you associated with outsiders these days It it pains me mrs. Bender. No, it really does But well it it was in regard to the hospital fund collection one of course. I should have guessed You'll be pleased to know that I have nearly all of it. I'm within 72 dollars of reaching the quota But that's fine. Yes People have been coming up here all day bringing money, haven't they where do you collect it your desk there? Get out of here. Get out of here right now. This has been enough, please Yes, it's just that we thought it would be best I mean now the money is almost in and in the light of the murder and all that But if I moved it to a safer place, I can open my bank at night. How dare you how dare any of you come up here? So yes, excuse me grandmother, but you're a fake you're a fraud You're supposed to be big in the circus world, but nobody big in the circus ever heard of you Why you're supposed to be a wealthy woman, but the financial world never heard of you Mr. Groot there was a gold presentation watch with your name on it handy for showing to the yokel's to impress them with your importance Well, I'm afraid it's the oldest confidence game in the world Sister to move out to the sticks and set yourself up as the grand dom until you and your boys could collect on the big Charity hall, but the party's over now sister. It's time to see party. I Didn't get an invitation that's all so you're back again. I'd be glad to show them my tricks. Don't worry. I'll take care Yeah, nobody's bigger than a gun Now for the last time I'm sorry mrs. Bender, but I'm going through your desk. No, please. I'm sorry The cupboard was bare Yes, it's gone cash check. What do you mean? It's been stolen. I just found out I've been sitting here wondering what to do stolen everything you've said about me is true Except one thing lieutenant. I wasn't planning to swindle. It was to help people. Yes, that's true, mr. Valentine Mr. Groot is known of course. She's the only one except for the circus people. You see I Was a thinker of a sort for 35 years. I was a wardrobe mistress since then Well, I've just been using the things I learned in life. That's all I've been what I never was able to be in the circus and Empress Even if it's only in fish falls Oh Mrs. Bender, why didn't you say so in the first place? Oh, I'll skip it I know you thought the sheriff could figure out short. He's killing without anybody getting wise to your game But don't you see whoever took the money knows it knows what a nice pants are you make you see even mr. Groot here began to doubt whoever took the money knew about where to find it to and that cuts us down to size About the size of this room what? Oh, but the boys are from the circus my kind of people There are bad apples in any barrel mrs. Bender Remember your midget friend moved into your house last night Well, he also moved into the killer's setup That wouldn't have made much difference if the midget hadn't recognized him as a bad apple Oh, but no a new shorty here, but me. No indeed. I never met him Well, it doesn't make much sense unless one of you is lying Shorty mcdonald had been in the carnival and he did a double act in board and the only double I can board bill for a midget And I ever heard of it's low and high. Yeah the midget and The giant now wait a minute Empress there's no reason for everybody to look up at me the elephant here He's just as likely as I am. He was the one tried to squeeze the man to death. What's that? Yeah? Yeah, the big boy put me on all right, but maybe he was just being a little overzealous and trying to protect the Empress's Always like that. He's too strong Why don't you shut up beanpole? Shorty mcdonald wasn't squeezed he was shot and Can you imagine the elephant here sticking one of those sausage fingers of his into the trigger guard of a pistol? It wouldn't work. He couldn't do it He couldn't fire a gun. Oh, there's lots of things. He can't do that. I can do things. Nobody can do that I can do See, I Could fire a gun couldn't I always think no You could shoot yours and I could shoot mine and lots of people would be kids I said put it down the sheriff will be here and you'll be I don't want to kill lots of people do I? I'm gonna run away Empress, but I'll take good care of your money. Don't worry crazy I'll go out the back way there's a car in the garage with the sheriff comes in the front He can get out the back road get away. He won't get away. Let him go watch. Let him go Don't worry Getting away is one thing he can't do Remember Empress the only car in the garage belong to the midget and it's a midget car Come on rally. Let's take him Here you are Empress the Giants all tucked away and here's your hospital money all but that's 72 perks of course $72 oh, yes Just one moment lieutenant Riley. Hmm is it customary for a police officer on vacation to carry a gun, huh? Oh, well, I just happen to have it with me. That's of course you brought her along for snakes Lieutenant I do appreciate your promising to keep my secret, but I'm sure you'll understand me when I say that I Still need $72 the hospital fund for you. You you mean you You mean just because I'm in civilian clothes and carrying my gun What kind of a blackberry I said you had a gorgeous temper the first time I saw you. Here's my fountain pen sucker George Why is it that murders always happen to detectives everywhere they go? Whose life is like the movies I guess yeah, but George what I mean is Would you hold this pole the line seems to be stocking. Hey, give me that oh No, yeah Yeah, I'm afraid you're right folksy. Yeah We've hooked on to a fish You're driving in city traffic You're on a slight upgrade and you come to a stoplight with a line of cars right behind you The light turns green and you want to pull away fast You make it all right, but your car's engine does a lot of knocking what you want, mister Is chevron supreme the gasoline that gives your car ping-free power? 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I don't know He looks like the trunk or hat box type and if I'm right, we're gonna find a Brooks II somewhere tonight's adventure of George Valentine has been brought to you by standard of California on behalf of independent chevron gas stations and Standard stations throughout the West Robert Bailey is starred as George with Francis Robinson as Claire Wally mayor appears as Lieutenant Riley Let George do it is written by David Victor and Jackson Gillis and directed by Don Clark Also heard in the cast were Verna Felton as the Empress Eddie Marr as rubber face Alan Reed as Elephant Ed Max as Castle and Howard McNeer as Grove The music is composed and presented by Eddie Dunsteader your announcer John Heaston Listen again next week same time same station to let George do it This is the mutual Don Lee broadcasting system