 Lux presents Hollywood. Lever Brothers Company, the makers of Lux Toilet soap, bring you the Lux Radio Theatre, starring William Holden, Joan Caulfield, Edward Arnold, and Mona Freeman in Dear Wife. Ladies and gentlemen, your producer, Mr. William Keeling. Greetings from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. You know it's been my experience and it's always difficult to follow a successful story with a successful sequel. But just to prove it can be done, we're bringing you as our play tonight, Dear Wife. I'm sure you all remember the young lieutenant who wrote letters to Dear Ruth, which were so beautifully and romantically answered. That is, he thought he was writing to Ruth. But when he arrived home from overseas, it seemed it was Dear Little Sister Miriam. Well, it all ended happily, and as the curtain descended, Ruth was about to become Dear Wife. As our stars of this sparkling Paramount picture, we have William Holden, Joan Caulfield, Edward Arnold, and Mona Freeman, all recreating their original roles as one of your favorite families. And just as marriage is the perfect sequel to romance, so does the more beautiful complexion follow daily Lux Toilet soap care. You know wives everywhere know they can depend on this complexion care to be Lux Lovely. The curtain rises on Dear Wife, starting William Holden as Bill, Joan Caulfield as Ruth, Edward Arnold as Judge Wilkins, and Mona Freeman as Miriam. It's early morning in the residence of Judge Wilkins in a pleasant suburb of New York. Mrs. Wilkins and her eldest daughter are the first ones down for breakfast. Oh, hello, Mother. Where's Dad? Still asleep, dear. He got in very late. Well, what happened at the political rally? Well, I wasn't up when he came home, and the morning paper doesn't say. Mmm. Smells like popovers. Uh-huh. Your husband. Mom, Bill doesn't like to get the things he likes. Would you mind repeating that, dear? You know what I mean. Living with my family and not earning an awful lot. Well, he hates having a fuss made over him. And Mom... Yes? Bill's pretty unhappy about the rent we're paying here. Well, I didn't think it was too much. Well, that's just it. Bill doesn't think it's enough. Oh. It's his pride. And when he finds out that Dad bought me a new dress, Well, good morning. Well, good morning, Bill. Morning, handsome. I said good morning to you upstairs, but I'll say it again. Good morning, darling. Morning, Mr. C-Clock. Hi, Dora. Popovers for breakfast, Mr. C-Clock. And not because you like them. We all like them. Would I have married you otherwise? Thank you, Dora. Albert phone, Bill. He's picking you up in a few minutes. Oh, it's too early to have a look at Albert. When is a good time? Well, that's a difficult question. Oh, well. I apologize, Ruth. It's not nice to say that about the man who's in love with my wife. Oh, stop being silly. And besides, if my boss didn't love my wife, I'd have to walk to work. Good morning, everybody. Good morning, Miriam. Miriam. Don't tell me you've been outdoors already. Mm-hmm. Since I passed sixth, Mother. Another petition? It is not criminal, Ruth, for a citizen to take an active part in the struggle for good governance. But do you think it's a good idea to wake people up to have them sign things? Oh, that's a difficult question. Well, if the people in this town don't wake up, they'll send another mealy-mouthed fathead to the state senate. And we of the Civic Betterment League refuse to allow George H. Stiver to pick Stooges to represent us in Albany. Good morning, everyone. Good morning, Dad. Well, did you hear the good news? Well, no. What news, dear? Well, George Stiver nominated me for the state senate. Food should be chewed, Miriam, not guff. Yes, Father. And the caucus approved me unanimously. Oh, Dad, that's wonderful. Miriam, aren't you going to congratulate Dad? Well, sure. But, Father, you're a municipal judge. And the crime rate in this country has increased 28%. Don't you feel you're needed on the bench? Oh, I don't think our judicial system is going to collapse if I go to Albany for a few months. But I'd have to stay here in school, and we'd be separated. Well, that's an advantage I hadn't thought of. What your daughter is trying to say, Dad, is that she doesn't approve of Mr. Stiver. I do not, Father. Oh, well, he'll be very sorry to hear that. But I've known and respected George Stiver for 20 years, while he's one of the most... Good morning, everybody. Miriam, Mrs. Wilkins. Good morning. Hi, Albert. Well, well, well. Senate Wilkins, congratulations. Oh, thank you, Albert, thank you. Well, aren't you going to congratulate me? Hmm? Oh, well, uh... I'm afraid I haven't had the chance to tell him Albert, you know. They made Albert my campaign manager. I thought you'd be delighted. Oh, I am. I am. But you being at the bank and all that, I will... Well, as I always say, if you want a job done, well, give it to a busy man. Well, come along, Seacroft. Come along. Goodbye, funny face. Goodbye, darling. It's for you, George. Coming, coming. Miriam, I wish you'd show your father a little more respect. I'm completely honest with him. Is there a better way of showing respect than a short breakfast? Oh, that's quite all right, Harvey. Oh, I was just eating my... Who? Will Seacroft? My son-in-law? You sure there isn't some mistake? Well, of course I'll find out. Yes, yes, yes. I'll call you later. Ruth! Ruth! Yes, Dad? There's a petition out. Does Bill know that he's being run by the State Senate? Bill? Oh, that's ridiculous. He would have told me. He doesn't know. Miriam? Yes, Father? How do you know Bill doesn't know? Well, we didn't tell him. Ziggy and I thought that we shouldn't tell him. Ziggy? Who's Ziggy? Father. Ziggy's my boyfriend. Oh, golly. Well, I'm terribly late for school, mother. Goodbye, goodbye, Father. Miriam, wait a moment. Dan said you wanted to see me, Albert. Seacroft, when a man works in a bank, his job is banking. Very well put, Albert. What's this all about? Oh, come, come, Seacroft. Let's not pretend. It so happens I just saw that petition. Petition? Nominating you for the State Senate against your own father-in-law. Oh, relax, Albert. It's just my little sister-in-law playing politics instead of hopscotch. I haven't the slightest intention of running against anybody for anything. Now, is that all? For the moment, yes. Now, go along, Seacroft. I, uh, I've got to stamp these papers. Albert, I said that will be all for now, Seacroft. Albert, you're stamping your necktie. And kindly remember the... Ow! Anybody home? Oh, noon, Father. Just good afternoon. Come here. Yes, Father. I guess I was preoccupied. Didn't you say you wanted to see me? Yes, Father. I guess I was preoccupied. Did you have a good day in court, Father? No, terrible. And what's the matter with your arm? Nothing. Not a thing. Oh, I'm sorry you had a bad day, Father. Miriam, what have you got behind your back? Oh, it's just a copy of that weekly paper they throw away. I was going to throw it away, too. Miriam, you're a good girl who tried to spare your father's feelings, but I've already seen that letter they printed. Oh. I have been in politics for 25 years, and this is the first time I've been vilified. Styper, stooge, political fact. But, Father, you don't... Civic Betterment League, if they had the courage to sign their names, why, to sue them off a criminal libel. I... Civic Betterment League? Miriam, isn't that the name of the... He has, Father. I see, I see. You don't happen to still be its president? Oh, no, Father. Secretary. Oh, I see. And the secretary, it goes without saying, writes the letters and composes such happy phrases as political fact-headed and Styper, stooge? But, Father, I didn't know you were going to be Styver, stooge. Don't you dare use that expression again! Harry, what's the trouble, dear? What's usually the trouble eat at this doctor of yours? Have you seen the letter in the shopping news? Oh, hello, Ruth. Miriam wrote that letter? Father, I honestly feel you're too sensitive for men in public life. My public life is fine as my whole life is driving me crazy! Harry, you're losing your temper, dear. I am losing my mind! Well, well, a happy candidate in his little family. Hello, darling. Uh, heartwarming picture. Hiya, baby. I suppose you've heard about Miriam's petition, Bill. Yeah, but it didn't go to my head. Say, what's this, a new dress? Huh? Oh, oh, no, no, darling. It's just my old beige eye. I had it dyed and took off the peplum. Well, it came out fine. Father, I'm genuinely sorry if I've hurt you. What do you mean, if you hurt me? Oh, let's talk about something pleasant. Oh, Bill. Hi. Ruth. That's a lovely dress Dad bought you. Miriam. Well, wasn't that pleasant? You know, a very funny thing happened caught this morning. So it is a new dress. Bill. But Bill, I didn't mean to tell you a lot. Oh, now look, Bill. So I bought her a new dress. Oh, it's perfectly all right. I'll go upstairs and get cleaned up. Ruth, did I do something wrong? No, I did. Look, baby, forget the dress. I just don't feel like talking about it. Oh, Bill, please. I've been very stupid, darling. No, dress not anything is worth seeing you unhappy. Ruth, would you mind terribly if we moved out, took a room someplace, if we can find one? Not if you want us to. Well, wasn't anything Mom or Dad said? No, no, but you know how I feel about taking favors. We'll move, Bill. Any time you say. Well, there I go, being crazy again, asking you to live in a two by four dump just because my pride's bigger than my salary. Well, wouldn't it solve everything if I got a job? No, honey, we're not going through that again. But it would give you a chance to look for something better than the bag. Look, would you do me a favor? Of course. Shut up and kiss me. Yes? It's your land, Lord. Come on in, Dad. My wife tells me that you're trying to get your rent raised. Yes, sir. We'd like to oblige our tenants, but just look at this room. Why, it's the nicest room in the whole house. It hasn't been painted for four years. Well, it doesn't need painting, and the wallpaper's like new. Just look at this carpeting. But it's fine carpeting. It's hardly worn at all. And as for this radio we gave you, it finds older than I am. Well, there's nothing wrong with the radio, except maybe a slight cough. Here, I'll show you. Ah, I bet it won't even light up. As for the rest of the furniture in here... ...stopping news which called Judge Wilkins a political fathead in Stiver's stew. Oh, Dad, please! Burned on by that letter, a Seacroft for Senate proof has been bought. A dinner for their... Come on! Come on! Fathead in capital letters. Oh. And now for the weather forecast. It looks as if... Judge, believe me, I don't know a thing about this dinner. Oh, it's all right, son. I'm sure you don't. Oh, Bill. Well, just don't stare at me. Oh, come on. Let's go downstairs. You came home, Bill. Telegram, huh? I'll be right down, honey. Is it all right if I open it? No. Too late. Bill! What is it? What's the matter? Didn't you call off that dinner? What dinner? Those people who want you to run for the State Senate. It's tonight. Oh, no. Look, it says unable to reach you on phone. Tommy Murphy will call for you tonight at 7.30. Bill! Didn't you tell them you weren't running? Me? I thought you were going to phone them. Oh. Oh, hello, Albert. The door was open, Ruth, so I just walked in. Well, see, croff, fine thing, selling out your wife's father for a plate of soup and lukewarm chicken. I am not going to that dinner. Oh, I see. Tommy Murphy is calling for you, so as not to take you to the dinner. You'd better phone him, Bill. All those people are expecting you. Wait a minute. The chairman of the Wilkins campaign has the germ of an idea. Yes, sir, the germ of an idea. Keep away from him, Ruth. He's got germs. See, croff, these misguided people are gathering tonight to oppose your father-in-law. Now, who better than you can change their mind? You want Bill to go? Oh, no, no, no, no. Ruth and I are going out for dinner, and we have tickets to a very fine musical. And besides, I don't go places where my wife isn't invited. It's just a political dinner, dear, and maybe you could help Dad. Well, I'd sure like to help him. If you're worried about those tickets, I'll take Ruth. Well, honey, you do want to see the show. And why waste the tickets? Well, you're sure you don't mind? Why should I mind? Say, I better put on a dark suit. I think I'd better go on up two for a minute. Excuse us, won't you, Albert? Darling, I don't think I want to go. Oh, go on, baby. Have a good time. Well, if I was sure you meant that... Oh, honey, you know how I feel about Albert. No, I don't. I was never engaged to him. Oh, look, Mrs. Dope, I'm kidding. Ten to one, I'll have more fun with Mr. Murphy. Well, I'll go out and get some beer and cigars. Isn't that what politicians like? I'll worry about my fellow. You look after yours. I'll be down about five minutes. Uh, yes? Good evening. I'm Tommy Murphy. You, uh, you're Tommy Murphy? Mm-hmm. Well, hello. I'm Bill Seacroft. Oh, Ruth, Mr. Murphy's here. Uh, we thought you'd be a man. So did my father. That's how I got the name. Well, you're good-looking. That's a great political asset. Young, too. He's 30. I'm Mrs. Seacroft. Uh, she's 24. How do you do, Mrs. Seacroft? I'm Albert Kummer, 3rd Avenue State Bank. How do you do? Uh, I hope you don't mind my dragging your husband away. Of course I don't mind. I'm taking her to the theater. Ready, Ruth? I just have to get my rack. Oh, let me help you, dear. It looks like politics might be very interesting. You behave yourself. Have a good time, baby. Oh, Albert, uh, I can trust you, can't I? I'm sure that Ruth will want to get home early. Early? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Hello, Clara. This is Miriam. Clara, Bill's gone to that dinner. And what do you think? His campaign manager is a woman. Yes, young, sophisticated, and very vital with red hair. Ruth? Well, of course she's not jealous. Why should she be? Clara, jealous is the most infantile of all the emotions, and is indulged in only by people who are fundamentally maladjusted, insecure, and... And... Clara, who did I just hear talking to you? But I did, Clara. And it sounded like Ziggy. Well, what's he doing at your house? Well, of course I don't care. Ziggy's got a mind of his own, hasn't he? Such as it is. Oh, never mind. I'll see you tomorrow, Clara. Oh! Thank you again, Albert, for a very nice evening. But now, why don't you just run along? Why? Because Bill isn't home yet. Well, the dinner probably lasted very late. Of course. Probably has nothing to do whatever with that attractive Miss Murphy. Of course it hasn't. I'm just worried there's so many accidents. I know, and I admire you, Ruth, for not being suspicious. Albert, believe me, there's nothing to be suspicious about. Oh, it's ridiculous. Why don't we phone Miss Murphy's home? Oh, Albert, I wish you'd go home. But I'm just trying to cheer you up, and believe me, it's not easy to defend a man who at this very moment is probable. Bill? Oh, I'm sorry I'm so late, darling. Hello, Albert. Well, Ruth, an awful lot happened tonight. So we gathered. Ruth, I'm running for the State Senate. You... you what? Running? Against a? Oh, it's the last thing in the world I intended to do, but... The man is down here. What's going on? What's going on? Judge Wilkins, the son-in-law of yours is running against you in the primaries. Bill? Yes, sir, I have to. The most shocking act of this loyalty I ever... Your son-in-law living in your own house. Albert, I know where he lives. Well, aren't you going to do anything? What should I do? Hit him with a hairbrush? Oh, Albert, why don't you go home and get some sleep? Well... well, maybe I take treachery too seriously. Good night. Now tell me, what is all this about? Well, Judge, I went to this dinner only to talk for you. And I did, from my heart. But they brought up this airport issue, and it was the first time I'd ever heard the other side. And you don't agree with me? No, sir, I don't. As a matter of fact, I feel so strongly about it that I've got to oppose you. Oh, Miss Murphy must have been very persuasive. Miss Murphy? Oh, yes, yes, she was. So were the others. I see. Oh, now, Ruth, darling, this isn't like you. Well, I didn't think it was like you to turn against my father. But this is a matter of principles, of convictions. Oh, I know I won't win, but I... Ruth, Ruth, where's your sense of humor? Don't you think I'd holler my head off if I thought he had a chance? Go to it, my boy. Thanks, Judge. Hey, Ruth, you see? Well, honey, what do you got to say now? Good night. I'm very tired. Hmm. Well, where's the opponent? How about it a night, Captain? I think I could use one. Now, now, now, Ruth will get over it. Yeah, I suppose she will. Well, to Senator Wilkins. Thank you, my son. Merriam! Go to bed! In just a few moments, we'll bring you Act Two of Dear Wife. KNX 1070, news radio. Now, Mr. William Keely, our producer. Act Two of Dear Wife, starting William Holden as Bill, Joan Caulfield as Ruth, Edward Arnold as Judge Wilkins, and Mona Freeman as Merriam. Well, it appears that the Wilkins family is offering the public two candidates in the contest for the State Senate. The judge and his son-in-law, Bill. And so far, the rivalry has been exceedingly friendly. It's late afternoon, and Judge and Mrs. Wilkins are expecting guests, some 50 campaign workers, for a barbecue dinner in the garden. Father! Well, Merriam? Would you mind terribly if I'm not present at this dinner? No, I'd be delighted. Why? In a moment, Mother. Are Ruth and Bill coming to the dinner? Well, Ruth and Bill are with some of their friends. We'll see them later at the rally. In case you don't know it, Father, Ruth may not vote for you. Then again she may. Ruth hasn't made up a mind yet. Well, I have a problem, too. Mm-hmm. Let's put it this way, Father. Let's say that you were crazy about your father. Well, I was. And he was running for public office. And his political views were... Well, I don't mean stupid, exactly. Well, thank you very much. Well, what I mean is that this is a party for your supporters. And if I'm here as your daughter, that's one thing. But politically... Well, what should I do? Get the napkins for your mother. Yes, Father. Eater, do you suppose that if I pulled some strings we could get that child deported? Oh, Harry. Harry, that's terrible. Not help me with these shit. Hello, Ziggy. I'm busy. Oh, but I thought I'd tell you the news. I get to play in the baseball game tonight. Oh, congratulations. Well, what time do you be ready? For what? For what? To watch me play. Oh. Oh. I got to watch my father play statesman. We're having that dinner. Dinner? Well, don't you remember? You mailed the invitations for me. I mailed... Oh. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Miriam! I'm waiting for those napkins. You can see how busy I am, Ziggy. Yeah. Miriam, I... I think I have something to tell you. About those... Well, about those invitations... But I can't understand the need if... You ask 50 people for six o'clock, you certainly expect them by 6.30. Well, I'm here, Judge. And these spare ribs, delicious, Mrs. Wilkins. Simply delicious. Well, it's only five minutes to seven, Harry. Yes, but the rally starts at eight. Oh, well, it's Saturday, and people go into town, and they get caught in traffic jams. Or 50 of them. Well, you needn't be annoyed with me, Harry. Very peculiar. 50 pounds of spare ribs, oh, dear. Father! Father! I think Ziggy has something to say to you. Oh, not now, Miriam, not now. I think it's very urgent, Father. Well, what is it, Ziggy? I... Is there anything else? Father, it's really my fault. Your fault, I take that for granted. Now, tell me, what is your fault now? Would you like to clarify that for him? Last spring, Ziggy's been on the bench, Father. Well, I've been on the bench for 20 years. Well, money, the coast told him to warm up. Oh, now, really, Miriam. Well, he got so excited, he misled his bicycle. Well, I'm very shy, but I didn't take it. The bicycle had a carrier, a sort of a basket. That's very interesting, then. Is that the whole story? No, Father, but the invitations for tonight were in the basket. I forgot to mail them. Goodbye, Miriam. Oh, no, no, I don't believe it. Miriam. Oh, I'm very sorry, Mother. We'll speak to you later. Come along, Harry, we might as well get over to the rally. Not to mail the invitation, I just don't believe it. All your in, Judge. Great speech. Nice work, Judge. That's telling, young seeker. Thank you, thank you. Don't forget my place after the rally, huh? Those sparrows, they're still waiting for it. Don't worry, Judge, I've invited everybody. Oh, fine, I'll be fine. And now, ladies and gentlemen, we'll hear Candid C. Crosby bottle. Thank you. See you later. Come along, Harry. We might as well get over to the rally. Not to mail the invitation, I just don't believe it. I don't care of any reasonable sacrifice to bring one to Van Buren Heights. But let's take another look at that sacrifice. Demanding that 140 people give up their homes just so that we can have an airport? No. And if selected, I'm not going to. Thank you. And now? Now we'll have questions from the audience. One at a time, and please keep them brief. This question is to Mr. Seacroft. Mr. Seacroft, how old are you? I'm 30. 30 and no experience. Four years overseas ain't that experience. The chair? The chair recognizes the gentleman on the aisle? Judge Wilkins, was your house ever torn? No, sir, it was not. That's all I wanted to know. Mr. Chairman. Chair recognizes Mr. Seacroft's campaign manager, Miss Murphy. Thank you. Judge Wilkins, you said in your speech that you wanted no punches, Bull. Yes, that's right, Miss Murphy. Is there any truth to that letter in the shopping news that you are starved as stooge? That letter was absolute nonsense. But wasn't it written by your daughter? Well, uh... Wasn't it, Judge? Yes, it was. We want Seacroft! We want Seacroft! We want Seacroft! We want Seacroft! The KMX Drama Hour continues with the second part of tonight's presentation. Every night at this time, it's an hour of outstanding entertainment for Radio's Golden Past. Stories of adventure, mystery, and comedy. Yours for the listening on KMX 1070 and Infinity Station. Well, was it my fault, Ruth? Anything can happen at a rally. What's the good of talking about it? Very clever girl, Miss Murphy. What do you mean by that? Albert said she's clever. Is that so hard to understand? Yes, it took brains to find out that Miriam wrote that letter. Are you suggesting I told her? Is that what you think, Ruth? Does it matter what I think? I think you shouldn't be running against Dad, but you are. Oh, I've heard all that. Well, here's something you haven't heard. I'm voting for my father. And we'd appreciate it if you'd be a little more pleasant by the time we get home. Why? Because all those people, Mother and Dad, expect it before the rally will be there. Oh, fine. Yes, Clara, of course. But as long as Mother and Ruth remain infants politically, the responsibilities are on my shoulders. Uh-oh. They're not back from the rally yet. My father made me stay home. Oh, incidentally, I just saved him $40. So I think he'll feel a lot better when he... Oh, they've just come home, Clara. Talk to you tomorrow. Goodbye. Hey, I'll see you still up. Mother, you're going to be very pleased with me. My dear. Well, rather than see them spoil, I phoned Mr. Hudson Cleaver at the Delac contestant and he came over and bought up all the spare ribs. Oh, no! Mother! Mother, who are all those people? Just the campaign workers, dear. We invited them all over for spare ribs. Oh! How is that match with your cigar? The wastebasket's burning. Already burned! Now put the newspaper down, dear. It just makes you feel miserable reading about that rally last night. I can understand how the judge feels. That's a big help, I'm sure. There's no need for sarcasm, dear. Well, at least she spoke to me, Mother Wilkins. I think it's nice when a wife talks to her husband. Good morning, everybody. Good morning, Miriam. You know, this dining room could be used for a deep freeze. No, keep quiet, Miriam. Yes, Father. I've been thinking that it might simplify everything if Ruth and I found another place to live. Perhaps that would be best. Please, I am in no mood for nonsense. Father, could I make a suggestion? No! Oh, for heaven's sake, Harry. All right, what is it? Well, a spirit of ill will has come into this home. And why, my suggestion may seem a bit drastic. Oh, never mind the preamble. Well, Father, why don't you just withdraw from the race? Miriam! Well, it was merely an idea. What kind of a family have I got, anyway? My son-in-law humiliates me in public. That's hardly fair, sir. You keep out of this. In my youngest daughter, my diabolical, my macabee-lian. What warfulness, will you? A man raises a family, sure he's entitled to some respect. But what do I get? Hot waffles, dad! I don't want any hot waffles! Well, it certainly isn't compulsory, Harry. Ruth? I'm not hungry, Mother. Excuse me, I'm going upstairs. Bill? No, thanks. Ruth, wait a minute. Will you have a hot waffle, Miriam? Yes, please. I'd love a hot waffle. Oh! That's exactly right. I'm packing our suitcases. We're moving. Moving, but why? Oh, honey, it's obvious. Now help me, will you? Don't you think I ought to have something to say about it? Well, what's there to say? You know what the mess things are in. Well, whose fault is it? Nobody's mine, if you like. What difference does it make? You don't consult me about anything, do you? Now, Ruth. For political advice, you go to Tommy Murphy. You might at least consult me about where we live. Please, we've been all through that. Bill, you're acting like a child. You don't even know where we're going. We'll find a room. No. We've got to. Look what's happening to us. All this bickering. If we go on living with your family, it's just... It has nothing to do with my family. We're not leaving. Ruth, I hate this wrangling. Now get your things. I meant what I said. I'm not going. And if you want to go without me, go right ahead. It's fine with me. Go now. The sooner, the better. All right. I will. Hello, Bill. Oh, hello, Maryam. Bill, I know this is a bank and that you're awfully busy. But have you got half a minute? Yeah, sure. Well, how are you, Maryam? Oh, depressed naturally. Bill, I'm not going to interfere and ask you to phone Ruth or something. But I thought you might benefit from my own experience. Yeah. Ziggy and I had a terribly bitter quarrel. I lost my temper and I told him I wouldn't go to the PTA dance. I'm sorry, Maryam. Oh, you needn't be. That's my point. I'm going to pocket my pride and call him. I'm going to tell him how wrong I was. Even though I wasn't really. You see, Bill, when people are grown up... Hi. Oh, Ziggy, how did you know I was here? I didn't. A bank is a public institution. Mr. Seacroft, I'm in a bad jam, sir. Huh? Could I borrow your tuxedo? Well, you got any collateral, Ziggy? Well, I got studs in a boiled shirt. It's for the PTA dance. Well, I haven't told you I was going, Ziggy. I'm taking Clara. Clara? Oh. Could I borrow it, sir? Yeah, I'll have it here tomorrow. Oh, thanks a lot, Mr. Seacroft. So long, Mr. Seacroft. Well, he must think I care. Do you? Yes. In the battle of the sexes, nobody ever wins. Goodbye, Bill. Alice, would you mind getting Judge Wilkins' house on the phone? I... I... Yes, sir? No, I'll be darned if I will. Well, whatever you say, Mr. Seacroft. Is that you, Ruth? Yes, Mother. Anybody tell a phone? No, dear. Why should Bill call you? Have you called him? Oh, Dad, please. Well, I saw Mr. Burroughs and he gave me a job. Forty a week. Ruth, I don't approve. I know, Dad. I'm behaving like an idiot. I'm a stubborn, mule, and a spoiled child. Anyway, Mr. Burroughs said I could take over the apartment rentals here, but he'd rather I worked for him in Chicago. Chicago? Ruth, I absolutely forbid it. Dad, I'm twenty-four. And I wish you were ten so I could paddle some sense into you. Harry. Ruth, come here. I want to tell you something. Before you were born, your mother and I had quite a row. While it was a bar I don't even remember. Do you eat it? No. There, you see? It happened over nothing at all. But we were young and proud and stubborn. So I packed my things and moved over to the YMCA. But your mother, bless her, she phoned me. You remember, Ruth? Well, I'd just think of it if she hadn't phoned me. All that's good in our lives would have been thrown away. Our home, our children, our love for each other. Oh, excuse me, Dad, I think that's Mr. Burroughs. Harry. Hmm? When did you move into the YMCA? Why, you made up that whole fantastic story. Well, I didn't. I read it here five minutes ago in the magazine. Yes, right away, Mr. Burroughs. Thank you. It was Mr. Burroughs. There's an apartment Mr. Burroughs wants me to show that new building at Third and Oak. Now just a minute, Ruth. Sorry, Dad. He said right away. See you later. The apartment, huh? He just isn't Bill still looking for a place? But yes, just he is. I see. Well, I think I'll make a phone call. What's the number of that bank, anyway? Oh, you'd better hurry, Bill, if you're going to make that speech during your lunch hour. Would you give me ten minutes off, Tommy? Why? Well, I'd like to run over to Third and Oak. There's an apartment I want to look at. Oh, how did you hear about an apartment? I don't know. Someone just called and left a message. Is this the apartment? Ruth. Bill, it was nice of you to come over. Well, I heard about the apartment. Oh, the apartment? Well, it's a very nice apartment. I was just here showing it to someone. Uh-huh. How long have you had a job? I just started today. Oh, about this apartment. There's only one drawback. The rent's 95 a month. Oh. Oh, well, that's okay. It is. I'm quitting the bank. I'm going to work for the shopping news, business manager. Oh, that's fine. A hundred a week to start with. Oh, that is fine. You know, it's funny, a guy running an apartment from his wife. I guess we did the sensible thing, don't you? The way things worked out? Yeah, yeah. When two people realized that they... Yeah, very sensible. Oh, Bill, it wasn't sensible at all. It was stupid. Just plain downright stupid. And if you think you could forgive me... Oh, you know what, darling? I think we just have time to... Oh. Oh, Ruth, you've met Miss Murphy, Tommy Murphy? Yes. Uh, she's taking me to lunch. I mean, we're going to lunch. Well, you'd better hurry. Well, Ruth... I'll mail you the lease. Oh, now look, Mrs. Seacroft, if you'll just listen to me, I can explain. Bill listens to you, isn't that enough? But, Ruth, it's just... Please, I wish you'd both go. Yeah, yeah, sure. May I come in? Oh, Mr. Burroughs. I'm glad you're still here, Mrs. Seacroft. I brought you those leases. Mr. Burroughs? Yes? I've changed my mind about this job. I want to go to Chicago! The curtain rises on Act 3 of Dear Wife, starting William Holden as Bill, Joan Caulfield as Ruth, Edward Arnold as Judge Wilkins, and Mona Freeman as Miriam. Bill Seacroft's found a new job and a new apartment, but it certainly appears that he's lost a wife. While Ruth prepares to leave for Chicago, the political campaign is drawing to a close. Naturally, Tommy Murphy is seeing more and more of her favorite candidate. Oh, hello, Tom. Come in. Well, nice tidy place you have here, Bill. Oh, just push your way through. I'm crazy about housekeeping. I hear your wife's going to Chicago. Yeah, I heard. Why don't you see her? No, it's gone too far, Tommy. It's not going to please the voters, is it? It's not just the campaign I'm thinking about. Phone her, Bill. What's her number? I said no, Tommy. Well, I've tried to be a Girl Scout. Now I'll be a heel. Bill, how do you feel about me? When I like you fine. You know that, Tommy? That doesn't answer my question. Bill, I can't pretend I'm sorry about the way things turned out. You see, I like Ruth, but I like me better. And you quite a lot. Well, there now it's your turn to make a speech. I haven't anything prepared. Hello? Bill, this is Miriam. Oh, hello, Miriam. Well, I'll be running along. Oh, hold on a second, Miriam. And, uh, you might think about that speech, Bill. I'll call you later. Sorry, Miriam. Well, that's all right. He did the dance, the PTA dance, Tuesday night. A dance? Oh, now look, honey. Oh, Bill, you've just got to... Look, Miriam, there must be dozens of fellas your age who'd like to take you. Oh, but, Bill, I can't let Clara take him away from me. That... that Ziggy character? Oh, now look, Miriam, I'm really very flattered that you want to take me, but now how are... An angel. Thank you. Goodbye. Oh, it worked. It worked. It worked. It worked. What did? Bill's taking me to the PTA dance. Bill? Well, don't you see? Parents will be there, an alumni. Well, it's so simple. We get Ruth to go to the dance. She sees Bill, and no Chicago. Well, that's a good try, honey, but Ruth won't be here. She's changed her plans. She's leaving in the morning. Oh. Oh, Ruth? I'll put phone, dear. He said he'll be right over. Thanks, mother. He's taking me to the railroad station. Is she still going? What do you mean, is she still going? That foolish girl. Well, Bill's just as obstinate. Oh, if there were just something we could do. What if I wrote her a letter and signed Bill's name to her? Miriam, please! No letters. Oh. Well, then I suppose I could... No. Where? Is our little chick ready to leave the roost? Oh, hello, Albert. Albert, I am not in a very good humor. Now, now, judge, it's all for the best. Chin up. Albert, do you have to be a yuck, Miriam? We're all very upset, Albert. But why? Ruth once made a foolish move. Now she's making a wise one, and I say more power to her. And I say, shut up. Oh, I'm sorry, Albert. Well, she'd better hurry. I've got to drive slow. My brakes aren't fixed. Bad brakes, huh? Hello, Albert. Oh, I'll take your luggage out to the car, Ruth. Come along, Miriam. We can help. Aren't you coming to the station, Dad? I can't have any accession in traffic court. Well, have a nice trip and drop us a line occasionally. Oh, I'm glad you're not upset about my leaving. Upset? Why should I be? You want to go, don't you? Well, you don't have to be so happy about it. Oh, I'm just making the best of things. Coming, Ruth. Goodbye, darling. Goodbye, dear. Forty brakes, huh? Operator. Operator, give me the police department. This is Judge Wilkins. It's Eckwaters. Yes, I know. I know. This is Judge Wilkins. Let me speak to Lieutenant Walker in the traffic court. Where is Judge Wilkins? I insist upon seeing Judge Wilkins. That's the general idea, but this happens to be traffic court. What is this? What is all this? Well, Judge, it seems the sky here, Ruth. He did, Ruth. I'm here, too, Father. Yes, I see you are. Judge Wilkins, you won't believe what I had to go through. You simply won't believe it. Father, these two officers are driving, Harry, and he just... Order, order, please. This is a courtroom. They made me miss my train. I'm terribly sorry to hear that, Ruth. Ruth was a witness. She can testify. The witnesses will please sit down until they're called. Now, what's the charge? I charged them with false arrest, attempted assault and battery, and tearing my new blue suit. Look, just look! Sergeant, tell me what happened. Well, Judge, I was close to... What has happened? These guerrillas stopped me and asked me about my bakes. I told them who I was, and they were extremely rude. He made a very uncalled-for remark, Your Honor. And then these two pigs... That was a remark! Just because I had the hiccups, they said I was drunk. Lunge, mind you! Oh, I shouldn't get excited. Well, he acted drunk, Your Honor. Then they took me to the police station. They made me walk a straight line. Now, now, Albert. And then I had to blow up a balloon. So, priority test, Your Honor. Can't a man hiccup without having to blow up a balloon? Is it against the law to hiccup? Oh, I shouldn't get so excited. Tell me who tore his coat. He did it himself. I'm telling him by the slave, see? And he runs away and I'm still holding the slave. Oh, here. Thank you. Thank you very much. Albert, you are charged with driving with 40 brakes and resisting an officer. I take it you're pleading not guilty. I am not guilty. And I'm an hour late at the bank as it is. I'll just take a seat for a moment, Albert, and cool off. A man my age blowing up a balloon! Say, Jim, you belong to the PTA, don't you? Yeah, sure, Your Honor. When is that dance? Uh, next Tuesday. Thank you very much. The trial is set for Wednesday 10 a.m. No bay will be necessary. That's very decent of you, Judge. And all witnesses are ordered to appear at same time. You don't mean me, Dad. I won't be here. I said all witnesses will appear. But I'm taking the next train to Chicago. The court is very sorry to inconvenience the witness, but our presence here on Wednesday is essential and is so ordered. But now look here, Dad. The young lady in the courtroom of witness does not address the judge's dad. Your honor is behaving like a stinker. And you'll stay in town for the trial, Mr. Seacruff? Or be arrested for contempt of court? Next case, please. Now, Ruth, you came to this dance to please your sister. Well? The least you can do is to be pleasant. You can do without the judicial tone, Harry. We are not in court. We will be in the morning. I don't find that very amusing. You know something, Bill? You're a very accomplished dancer. Thank you, Miriam. But I wish you wouldn't look so tragic. I want Ziggy to think we're having fun. Well, how's this? Now you look like an advertisement for toothpaste. Well, there's your Casanova in my pants. Oh, he's dancing with Clara. Miriam, are you expecting someone you keep looking around? No, what would I be expecting? Bill, what would you do if by the sheerst accident you happen to run into Ruth? Here at the dance? Well, she's not coming, is she? Oh, no. Also, you're disappointed. Look, let's just dance, huh? And you knew he'd be here, didn't you, father? He's your husband, Ruth. Well, I'm leaving. Ruth, Ruth, Ruth, come here. There's no need to make a scene. I'm just going home, that's all. Going home? Well, I must have been a very bad father. This has nothing to do with it. Oh, yes, it has. If I'd brought you up properly, you wouldn't be running away. You'd stay and face things. Please, I want a phone for a taxi. All right, Ruth, all right. The fact that you're a disappointment as a daughter is not important. If you want to be a failure as a wife and not much of a woman, go ahead, run out. On the other hand, if you'd care to dance... Oh, dad, I'd love to dance. That's my girl. Maryamon, it was sure nice of Bill to let me dance with you. Perhaps Bill just wanted to dance with Clara. Well, I'm glad you got here anyway. Oh, Ziggy, there's just no logic in my feeling about you. You're certainly not good-looking. You're politically unconscious. Oh, gee. You talk beautifully. Maryam, you... You want to wear my fraternity pin? Well, it's awfully nice of you to ask me, Ziggy, but giving a girl a fraternity pin is... Well, it's a barbaric symbol of possession. Like branding a cow. Oh, listen, I certainly don't think of you that way. But, Ziggy, if I were to wear your pin, it would mean that... I'll wear it. You will, huh? Oh, gosh. I can hardly talk. Well, well, well, well, well, well, Mr. Seacrawl. Oh, I'm sorry, Clara. See you later. I do not wish to dance with Clara. Well, my feet hurt, Albert. Ask someone else. You won't be quite so flippant when you've heard what I've got to say. Well, say it. This way, if you don't mind. Well, I have some extremely bad news for you, Seacrawl. You are no longer a candidate for state senator. Oh, I'm not. No, you're not. You've moved Hampton Oak Street. That's in the 10th district. You were a candidate from the 3rd. Oh, so you're disqualified. And some more news. I'm planning to spend my vacation next month in Chicago. Incidentally, Ruth will be in Chicago. Albert, go away, will you? You came between us once and it didn't work out. I trust you'll be sensible enough not to do it again. He said, go away. Ladies and gentlemen, I just received some news that you'll all be glad to hear. Van Buren Heights can now have its new airport and nobody will be left homeless. George H. Stiver is donating his Lakeview property for the airport. See a few words. Well, Mrs. Bixby. As most of you know, I have been very active in the campaign to elect our good friend, Judge Wilkins, to the state senate. In view of what you have just heard, there is no longer anything to be said in favor of that self-seeking young man who accepted the judge's bounty and the judge's daughter only to desert both, but he saw a chance for his own advance. Mrs. Bixby, please. Not a word of that is true. Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Mrs. Seacroft. My husband has never been supported by anyone but himself. If we've separated, it's no one's fault but mine. And no one's business but ours. I personally am going to vote for my husband. Ruth. Oh, Bill. Have you seen Bill? I said, have you seen Albert, that black eye? He said, Big Betterment League. And would you care to sign a petition? That's seven o'clock in the morning. What is it? Would you like to sign a petition to send William Seacroft to the state senate from the 10th district? Of course I would. Oh, just a second, Miriam. Good morning, darling. Good morning, darling. Kissing. At seven o'clock in the morning. Oh! Hearing radio classics on the KNX drama hour. Now here's Mr. Keely with our stars. The curtain has fallen on dear wife, but here she is with all her relatives to take an extra bow. William Holden, Joan Caulfield, Edward Arnold, and Mona Freeman. Joan, I've heard rumors that we haven't seen the last of the Wilkins family. That's right, Bill. Paramount has just finished the sequel to the sequel with the perfect title, Dear Brad. Who is an old maid of 18 played by Miss Mona Freeman. The only nice thing anyone ever says about me is that I'm a luxe girl. That's because you take after your older sister, Mona. Luxe toilet soap is my favorite complexion care. Eddie, you're also in Dear Brad, I hear. Yes, Bill and Joan seem to have gone elsewhere, but Mona and I carry on. Well, it's pretty obvious where Bill went. Right down Sunset Boulevard to win an Academy Award nomination for the best performance of the year. And we certainly want to add our congratulations and best wishes, Bill. And our congratulations to Eddie Arnold. You know, he's opening later this evening at the Biltmore Theater in Apple of His Eye. And by now, he has a bad case of butterfly. Oh, Bill, I can hardly believe that a veteran actor like Eddie has opening night jitters. Of course not. The idea is ridiculous. I completely forgot. Joan, you must have some interesting new plans, a new picture, maybe? The lady says no. Now, what kind of an answer is that? I thought you were making a picture with your husband, Frank Ross. That's right, Bill. Frank is directing and co-producing The Lady Says No with John Stillman Jr. Well, this lady says what are you planning for next week, Bill? Well, Mona, next week we'll present one of our favorite stars, James Stewart. You know, Jimmy was to have appeared a few weeks ago, but he'll be with us for sure next Monday night in a rollicking comedy when Willie comes marching home. And co-starting with him in this recent 20th Century Fox green success, we'll present William Demers in his original role and delightful Joanne Drew. Well, that's one we won't miss, Bill. Good night. Good night. Good night. You're a wonderful family. We hope you've enjoyed the KNX drama hour. Listen Monday night for Gunsmoke.