 Ladies and gentlemen Tony Gaskins here Get a little light in here pop it in. I missed the Q&A I Think last Sunday Mr.. Q&A, I think the Sunday before that and this Sunday I was gonna be gone out of town with my wife because if you've been keeping up with me lately I've had to be on the road quite a bit in the month of February, but Then my wife's gonna get away So I don't know if I'll be able to do a live this Sunday, so I want to pop in may pop in again to Tomorrow if I'm able to and I'm trying to get some questions answered So let's get right to it the divine Lena and Thanks to the new members. I believe the link is in the description to be a member of the blessed tribe He blew up my cell a week after I left him a month later I called him for us to meet and talk he had plans with his son He agreed within an hour, and he didn't call till late. I didn't pick up for days Four days or four days no talk well Not really much of a question that kind of sound like what you see is what you get type of situation and I was reading today in one new book a Woman's influence if you haven't pre-ordered that make sure you get that my wife and I was writing this book And it's a chapter in there about mind games just really what it's talking about is when you kind of put people on ice and you give them a silent treatment and you do these different things how sometimes they can backfire against you and You end up hurting yourself more than helping yourself versus just being real and direct Upfront with your thoughts your feelings your emotions and what you want to accomplish Hi broke up with my guy after about ten months one week ago After about ten months one week ago because he as a Christian kept struggling with abstaining Missing him. Is there another alternative? I just didn't want to fall I Mean every man you meet you're gonna have to break up with every man then unless he is a virgin But every man you meet pretty much is going going to struggle, but it's like What does that struggle look like? What does the struggle mean if the struggle means? He's putting hands on you getting ready to force you now you break up But if the struggle means he just crying and complaining and he just talking about it all the time. That's not really Something worth breaking up over what you can do instead for everybody that's trying to abstain is you got to set new boundaries And I think I got a video on that Call how to date correctly so by setting boundaries you can't be in the house You know after 6 p.m. You can't be in the house. You can't be spending the night. You know, you got to be able to Talk on the phone and go out for a date and then after that date then you Go home and then you get back on the phone But if you another thing is you may just want to peck on the lips versus tongue kissing You can't be doing any other funny business. So when you think about abstaining, you got to create boundaries That really feels like you are best friends. That's actually dating More so than you know, this couple trying to get down the business So y'all, you know, put your questions in there when you see me Closing up or answer a lot of people saying hello So it's kind of throwing off the chat you too need to create a thing where it just you could hit question and Yeah, it could file it all on the side where I could just go there and see them all How can I play my part and help a man be all that he can be? Encourage him tell him he could be all he could be just like the commercial it's really it's really nothing else you can do But speaking to his life, I think a lot of times what women try to do when it what a lot of women call playing their part Is letting the man live off of them, you know, he living in your house. He's driving your car You know and you giving him money you paying for his equipment. You're paying for this paying for that That's not really helping him and it's different if he's your husband and now y'all are one and he's earned that right in your life But when he just a boyfriend, you just need to be speaking into his life. Shouldn't be much else that you have to do I'm trying to book a session, but don't see any dates available. Is everything booked up? That is correct correct Maquisha that is all my sessions booked up Should be something available In in April if you visit my mentor dot life if you don't see anything on my mentor dot life That's available on that schedule then email support at Tony Gaskins calm Support at Tony Gaskins calm because I got two different schedules. So I got one schedule on my mentor dot life And then I got another schedule Just so my personal clients people that was already my clients before we launched my mentor dot life Miss Parker, I ain't gonna be able to answer no long question No two-part question if you can't fit it in one thing because I had too many messages in there Is co-worker interested been working together five months greets me in the halls But never had one-on-one combo at work He would have found a way to approach by now right not interested or position myself better You're right. He's not interested. He'll call you on your extension if he interested He'll call you on your extension. He'll send a note to you a man ain't gonna let nothing stand in the way Between him and a woman. He's interested in so trust and believe that Advice for healthy marriage Read my book make it work met with marriage. You can't really gloss over that stuff You need to read the book make it work It should be on sale now the paperwork. I mean not paperwork the paperback version just released in January So target Walmart Barnes and Noble books a million Amazon wherever you buy books from The audio book if you listen to books make sure you get the book make it work is what it's called Is it a red flag if a man in his mid 40s wants to date a woman in her 20s? Yes, that's a red flag That's a red flag because you young enough to be his daughter and Typically what you have to understand about Older men a lot of times it's just like, you know It's something new it's something new is It's young. It's fresh. It's Just it makes a man feel younger makes him feel accomplished and so But it is kind of to be that much apart that's kind of gross, you know It's kind of gross if a man should not be Attracted to or wanting to date a woman that is young enough to be his daughter. I Don't recommend that at all. You just in two different generations two periods of life It's a lot that you're gonna run into No, actually you need to read that book two or three more times if you need something extra You ain't read that book You read that book you gonna be asking that you read that book now you need that 300 pages in there. What else extra you want in there? Can you make your man jealous when he got lazy on you? No, you can't make him jealous, but you can work on you and he might Be inspired by seeing your hustle your grind seeing the way you treating your body The way you treating yourself the way you live in your life. You can help that way Well a man try again if he knows you're the one but you weren't sure the first time he shot his shot He may try again, but to be honest with you, I don't recommend entertaining if you if you were not For him the first time he shot his shot Don't get desperate because you turn them down for a reason So if he wasn't enough to help you heal or to make you curious The first time he shot his shot then keep it moving because now you'll be considering him out of desperation Frustration or whatever it may be and you don't want to do that because a lot of times when a man shoots his shot And you turn them down when he comes back. He's coming back out of He's coming back with some resentment. And so that could be a dangerous situation Can you speak more on breaking soul ties? That's a real deep question too deep that'll take up the whole session So I probably have to do a session on that But if you visit on Tony gasses academy calm I got a whole course on soul ties But that that'll be you know, you can't gloss over that really I'll be talking 20 30 minutes Boyfriend is great Says he prays and reads the Bible, but think it's not necessary to go to church told him that is a problem for me Said he will go, but I feel like he should know He should know he should already thoughts Well, you have to ask yourself why is it a problem for you You have to ask yourself, you know, what does it mean and what does it represent to you? And then you have to look at his life and his example, you know, is he living like Christ? So if he's not living like Christ and he doesn't believe in going to church now It's a real problem if he lives just like Christ, but he doesn't want to go to church Then you need to understand and ask him why he doesn't want to go to church You know, I'm a devout Christian, but I don't often get to go to church You know, I rarely get to go to church my son plays soccer on Sundays So a lot of times we in his ministry, which he's gonna use his platform of soccer to spread Jesus So, you know, it's different reasons why somebody may not do something and then a man being a man A lot of pastors are men men know men men read men And so for a lot of time for me and a lot of cases to us I don't always want to be sitting under a man that I know that he is you know Living in sin and and leading the flock astray because of the life. He's living so You can't put everything on On going to church until you really understand now if his answer starts to sound like a non-believer Now you got a problem, but if he has a deeper revelation and with the world we live in You don't know at one day if if the church will be banned If it'll be, you know, extinct and you know, you don't know and if you just gonna have to depend on your Relationship in the holy Bible in your house. So, you know, that's that's a deep one and you ought to get with them on that Aside from the clinical definition of narcissism a person can be Totally into self and not care about anyone else Isn't that a narcissist I'm not sure what you mean aside from the clinical definition because the clinical definition is what tells you what a narcissist is So it's really nothing aside from the clinical definition But I am not a clinician Now I've met some some kindergartners that fit that what you just described, you know I've met some some pro-athletes that fit that what you described so the The question would be is if that is is it a problem if somebody's completely Into themselves or focus on themselves. Is that a problem for you? And what does that mean to you? What does the word mean to you? Because some things is just left up to interpretation a lot of words is subjective because it could be a definition It could be an explanation But if your education don't understand two or three words in that definition It's gonna mean something different to you than it would to a person who understands every syllable in that definition so The thing is is you can't get so caught up on labels and you just have to look at a person and ask Yourself is this person a good person for my life with whether they are narcissists a sociopath or Whatever it is is this person good for my life and other than that just keep it moving Took your word about not falling for my male bestie We had a long convo and I made the choice to not be friends, but associates I need my future husband to know he's the only one who gets that spot I honestly feel like that's a great decision because a Lot comes into that when y'all talking about male besties It's a lot that women don't understand about that a lot of women say that a man is their friend and Yes, that may be the case. He may be your friend and he maybe has not tried you But if the opportunity presents itself nine out of ten men gonna jump on that opportunity And the man if your bestie don't want to be with you Marry you treat you like a queen Then he is in the way. He's blocking your blessings because every man know men and men know that there's really no such thing as a male friend men know that so if you got this Bestie male friend a man is not Coming into your life because he's gonna say, you know what I ain't with it I ain't with it. He just not gonna trust it and well in regardless of what you feel, you know about your friend He your friend Male friend is going to be blocking your blessings because most men is just not going to put up with that You just ain't gonna go through it um D bench a God bless you God bless you. I don't know if there was a typo or you meant to send that blessing God bless You on high Lord's pull out of blessing. I Don't know what taxes hit God bless you Lord bless her tenfold hundredfold What do you suggest for feeding the spirit with positivity while working on the three bees and not becoming desperate? What I suggest is replacing your Music if it's not healthy and wholesome music like gospel music Christian contemporary Christian music if it's not healthy and wholesome music replace that with Podcasts with YouTube video situations like this to where you're getting positive things Being fed into you Lanny say positive affirmations to That's another one positive affirmations cannot hurt. I got an affirmations book called. This is my year So create a routine to where you get up and you read Some you read an affirmation you may read a chapter of your Bible And then while you're going to work and still are just listening to music You may be listening to a video or a podcast and that's what I did in my life. That's that's what I did D Ben say she got her blessing the day. God bless you Christina bless you. Thank you. Tony. You are a wonderful man of God. You help heal broken hearts everywhere I'm grateful to be a part of the blessed tribe. Amen. Hey bless you. Bless you. I really appreciate you Jay Alexandria, how do you respond when a man asks you how long you've been single? Especially if you've been single a couple years will they see you as someone who's not a High value because men are not pursuing You tell them the truth You tell them the truth and to be honest with you the longer you've been single the better and the longer the better the only time men really start to get a little weary is when when you Cross 40 and I know this gonna upset a lot of y'all because you don't want to hear the truth Y'all say y'all want to hear the truth then when I tell you the truth you get mad with me start hollering and arguing at me But that's the only time men start to get a little weary is and kind of wondering is when you cross 40 if you've never been married and That's when a man starts to he has to look a little deeper It may not mean it's not a necessarily a bad thing But he's kind of he wants to get to know you to say to see if it's you or if it's something to where You've just been keeping your standards and you and men just have not been on your level and that's the answer He's hoping that it is Let me see After argument my man wants to retract our plans for the next day and got to and go two days without contact Why I broke up with them It depends on what that argument is now see you got the list what that argument is now if it's petty If it's a petty argument then okay He was wrong for that now if the argument was about you cheating or you stealing or you lying Then that's something different, but if it was a petty disagreement and then he You know Y'all got to talk through that because you can't make that a habit you got to be able to talk through things and Now on the flip side you it could be a red flag in the sense that if he gets that angry To where he has to distance himself because of he fears what he may do. That's another red flag So now the thing is though you can't just go breaking up with people every time y'all get into a disagreement And he pulls back for some distance So when you break up it need to be you breaking up You need to be done because you can't keep in and out in and out in and out So you want to make a decision on that if you're gonna be in or if you're gonna be out And y'all gonna learn how to communicate or y'all gonna be done Hi, Tony. I attended classes at my community College and I have ran into a certain guy two times and we have 30 to 45 minute combos. He seems like he wants to make the first move But seem hesitant. What should I do? Don't do nothing. Just keep doing what you're doing. Y'all talk another 30 45 minutes Then okay talk another 40 30 45 minutes The other what you got to realize is men ain't ain't really scared men ain't really scared Especially if he talked to you 30 45 minutes Sometimes what happens is that man may be in a relationship and he's in a battle in his heart on whether He should stay faithful or whether he should take a chance and try to cheat That's what it is sometimes. So don't don't get too serious about it Barbs, thank you so much for your blessing. God bless you tenfold. God bless you Trying to figure out why this man love daily. Thank you so much Trying to figure out why this man sends me mixed signals I cut contact for three days Then he expressed his feelings and told me he loves me But then he said that he's not sure if he wants to pursue why It's because you're not the one It's because you're not the one just just go ahead take on off about your business gone about your business When a man if he liked that and he in and out It's really he wants you to fill a roster spot. He just wants you to fill a roster spot He doesn't he doesn't want you when he when he's not too Active and then you pull back and then he want to show up and express himself And then he want to pull back again and say I don't know if I want to pursue you It's just my games that he wants you on the roster. You just practice. He you're not the one so cut them off for a hundred percent And gone about your life. Oh My Tosh he's in the industry and is very skeptical of new people due to the past He's had my number and wants to talk But only wants to talk in person when he gets here next month wait or get my track shoes Yeah Yeah, you don't have to get them track shoes You want to get them track shoes? But I mean because he could talk on the phone But he could be afraid of being recorded you talk on FaceTime could be afraid of being recorded may want to you know May want to see you in person but Yeah, you're gonna have to get them track shoes kind of ready just sit them on the side just in case you need them But definitely get them ready definitely get them ready because that's that's a little iffy It sound like you got a relationship and don't want nothing to be in that phone too much I'm 26 man. It's 38. How should I address? We haven't spoken on the phone yet. He asked me to friend him on Facebook a week ago He's a devout Christian as I am no kids never married no sex talk either That those type of relationships happen, you know, I know of relationships that that are like that you you're gonna struggle Y'all on two different Wavelengths, you know, he may feel like a father figure He may want to try to teach you and raise you But you gonna have your own mind and you may want to teach him and and give him some advice too And y'all just gonna be bumping heads because when you so far apart in age is kind of hard to see life the same way So you got a tread real lightly with that and you got to ask yourself, you know Are you desperate? Are you desperate? Are you tired of waiting? Do you feel like that's the man God sent for you? It sounds like a stretch to me, but only you really know if a woman messes up with a man and has to apologize How can I ensure the apology reaches him? I don't know what you mean by reaches him if you mean that he feels it that that or if you mean that he Actually gets it like gets the text message that you've seen The apology is That men don't really do apologies, you know, you could send it, but it really is not gonna mean much It's a saying God forgives men don't that's pretty much the truth you really not gonna Men just ain't wired like that. So it's like you can apologize for your conscience, but A lot of times when you mess up in a way that it's a deal breaker It's better to just go about your business because it's very very very very very few men who can truly forgive and Forget and you kind of set yourself up to be hurt real bad when when you Mess over a man and then you stick around for him to get that revenge So you got to be careful about that, but you didn't say what happened if it's not that big if it's some petty Then yeah, he can forgive, but if you know, it's a deal breaker apologizing Keep on moving with your life unless he shows you the heart the heart of forgiveness of Like Christ to where you feel that this man is truly mature and he's truly forgiven. If not keep it moving Bole, thank you so much. God bless you Tony Cannot see any questions when he is talking. Thank you. Bless people up. Wow. You sent me a blessing the the tail of people I can't see they question and and Bolega is right when you see me talking don't post your question. Wait till I'm done then post it in there But again, there's a lot of people posting. So I'm still gonna miss some of them I'm gonna try to do another one tomorrow. So if you get yours answered today, don't ask one tomorrow So somebody else could get one in and let go because y'all y'all went to dropping this hill Boyfriend lied about his background He's been to prison for four years and lied about it. He wants me to trust and forgive him. What are your thoughts? On out of there get on out of there because prison is actually like a Calling card today. I mean prison is a it's a good thing everybody trying to go to prison today, you know Ti went to prison Gucci main went to prison Little boots who went to prison. It's like the women today. Oh, you went to prison. You're a real man You know, so for him to lie about something that people getting credit for then You know, hey That that scared of me because it ain't really much shame about that with all the men that's going to prison today It's like he lying about that You lie about anything but something like that. That's big. That's almost like lying About whether you got children or not Can you talk about how to deal with an alpha male because I came across a video from AMS I don't know what that is and they basically say and act nice to lay women Well, listen listen right here a Lot of women make the mistake of trying to understand the games men play It's good to have the knowledge But what you got to know is what are your standards and that's all that matter because what you just said They say and they play nice to lay women So it's one rule is one rule that a lot of that a lot of women don't want to keep and Y'all already know if you follow my videos what I'm gonna say Stay off your bike Stay off your bike. If you stay off your bike He's gonna play himself because he could be nice as he want to be he could be nice as he want to be he can Wine and dine all he want to if you stay off your bike he gonna play itself Keep your legs closed like Caramel Kiss has just said so understand that right there. Yeah, it's worth Meeting I can't remember what question you asked I Recently met a really nice guy and I like him a lot He just revealed that he has stomach cancer and that he has two years to live Should I keep him as just a friend? That's a deep win, but this one thing I realized sometimes, you know, gotta put somebody in your life To teach you a lesson if he got two years to live and it's no other men knocking on your door What you got to say is look I'm not gonna you know Let you live off of me. I'm not gonna be giving you any money or anything like that, but a Person on their deathbed could teach you a lot about life and you could make his life a Lot easier going out get you some points in a good book, but then also sometimes God allow somebody to come into your life for you to be a blessing and for them to be a blessing to you So you never know he might he might have had life insurance before he got that and Can't trust anybody in his life and coming in your life to see if he could trust somebody that's gonna love him and he Leads you a nice blessing Not to say do it for that, but that's what I mean Sometimes people come into your life for reasons that you don't even know or understand why they showing up And so, you know, you got to kind of be be a blessing speaking to his life and And just make sure that you're not getting used Jojo, thank you. God bless you. God bless you for that. I'm 42 author Engineer single mom moving to a new state Staying off my back. Where do I meet single men over 30? To be honest with you men everywhere Jojo men are everywhere. It really comes down to You being open-minded and ready to meet a man So a man is at the gas station. He had the grocery store. He had Starbucks. He had Barnes & Noble He had church in a singles group. He had meet-up comm in the entrepreneur group And there's an inch an engineer group on meet-up comm a man is everywhere What it what it is is that you have to make sure that you have the mindset and that you truly ready to meet him Because he's reading you you right be ready. Don't be on your phone Don't be looking down. Don't be thinking negative thoughts all these men trash all these men. Sorry You can't even trust these men. Look at those sorry, but over there and oh, sorry. Look at him I think he looked good. So now when you doing that, he's your face reading you and You don't even realize it, but it's because of the music you've been listening to the conversations You've been having with bitter beddies and all of that So you looking at a man and your vibe just coming off as But when you ready and you telling yourself, I might meet my husband today I'm ready to meet my husband. I might meet my husband today. Now your face is Pleasant now you looking so a man see you and it's like you got your favorite You know song playing in your head and he he want to come to you y'all. Thank you The new members God bless you My ex-husband who cheated and had two babies now trying to reconnect. How do I deal with him? I usually ignore his texts. I am single and have forgiven him but I Do not respond to his text you doing the right things on you. Do not change your mind Think about this now. Don't do not change your mind. Keep going keep going. Okay. It's your ex for a reason Cheated and had two on you. Come on now. Come on. You could forgive him with him. You got to forgive him and Forget him That's how you got to do forgive him and forget him because see you dripping Swagoo on ragoo and so that's why he's trying to come back to you because you shine and looking like you doing good And so he want to get back in your life to get some of that favor that or on him But you got to keep it moving keep it moving Let him watch you from a distance Let me see. I'm looking for a question Tony I have more than one child is it too late for me Or do I have the right to have a good man due to learning to love and respect myself late in the game? You can have a good man. I don't know if you have a right to it, but you can have a good man What it comes down to is You're continuing to do the work and work on you and what you're gonna realize it's somebody for everybody So it might be a man who comes in and he really wants To be that father figure He want to be that father figure and he want to be there or he may have some of his own that he's not able to be in their life because of the mother and Her immaturity and the way that she is and so he he wants to be there but he may not want to start all the way over and Have some of his own and so he sees yours like his own and so understand that right there that It's never too late, but you just got to be prepared and you got to be ready and see I Tony what dating advice can you give a 55 year old woman that was married for 21 years? been divorced for One year and a half Would definitely like to get married again two children 17 and 19 55 year old one married for 21 years You wise you know the game you done been around but now listen when you've been married for 21 years and you come out It's kind of like getting out of prison Thank you, Cheyenne for saying don't forget to hit the like button and for your blessing. God bless the Lord bless her Bless all these new members bless all my current members. So it's like coming out of prison after doing a 21 year So 21 years ago now you got to learn what Facebook is how it works. What an iPhone is Self-driving car used to see in a Tesla plugged up to the wall and you like what in the rural I Was driving a 1975 Buick now they got this car plugged up to the wall at the airport and it say it drive itself So you see what I mean That's what it's like dating when you come out and you've been you know tied down for 21 years So you got to heal and you got to relearn you got to take and go through the school the relationship school I got a course called relationship a Real love university on Tony gasses academy.com go to the academy Tony gasses academy calm The link might be in this description and you got to go to school and you got to catch up you got to refresh you got to know what you up against out here and then with that knowledge you able to approach it and Not get hurt because you're gonna recognize the red flags, but you're in a good season in your life and the thing about it is You need to be in expectation of meeting a man who's gone through the same thing you did He first mistake first marriage was a mistake learn from it. He'll he's grown He's 55 and he's ready to meet somebody the ride into the sunset Do I give an ex-boyfriend a second chance after emotionally cheating? Nothing physical that I know of just inappropriate Conversations, oh you cut him quick. You cut him quick. It ain't many women that a cutter man off of conversations now You cut him quick now You can't assume that anything physical happened But a lot of times when it's emotional it is some physical that that then Transpired, but you can't assume that if you don't have the evidence, but I'm just here to tell you as a man Let me tell you something else as a man is that Let me tell you something else as a man is that it's very easy. It's very easy to cheat It's very easy Very very very very very easy And so what I tell women all the time when you catch a man cheating is ten times ten other times that you did not Catch is that easy? It's that easy And so, you know, I would say If you felt it was bad enough to leave him for it and you had the strength to leave him You got to be careful about that second chance And you got to make sure that he has done enough and shown you enough that shows you that he's changed as a man He needs a look different walk different smell different talk different all of that how important How important is physical attraction? I've had guys approach me who were nice and I tried to give them a chance But I wasn't attracted to them at all. It is important. It is important It's not everything but this the thing you should at least be able to To look at the man and and he grow on you You know, if he make your stomach turn if you feel a little throw up in your throat Then you can't force that, you know, if you got to Turn your nose up and then change your face. You can't force that but if you look at him He's like, you know, he's not bad looking. He's not Everything I've dreamt of but he's not if you can say that then it's not too bad But what you have to realize is a lot of time we treat people based on how the world treat us So if the man is looks challenged He's gone through a lot in life because the world is not kind to people that the world deems as looks challenged And it's unfair. It's very unfortunate But he's gone through so much that it has humbled him and it's taught him to be nice Especially when you first meet somebody so now but see on the flip side of this is with a look challenged man encouragement world God bless you or woman More specifically a man. What happens is you have the ugly duckling syndrome So a lot of times when you give a man a chance that you're not Attracted to by him getting you now affirms him and boost his confidence And now he went from being the ugly duckling to thinking he's the swan So now because he got a swan in his eyes. He start to want to figure. Oh, I could get other swans That's what I call the ugly duckling syndrome from their book that you read when you was low and I see this a lot, you know I see looks challenged man get a woman who is giving him a chance because the man the men that she was Attracted to then hurt her and then all of a sudden he gets her and Then the looks challenged man start to act a fool and he starts to turn out to be worse than the man That she was actually attracted to and it's because he don't know how to handle success He don't know how to handle a woman that looked better than him And so he started to act a fool and he started to get you know Happy and want to start seeing how many other swans he can get because he was used to being the ugly duckling That was getting overlooked some of y'all giving advice How do men perceive being blocked on social media? Does it bother them or does it make? Or does it make you look weak? It don't make you look weak now. It do not make you look weak It make you look strong when you could block somebody it makes you look strong Yes, I had a block me three four five of them today So a lot of time when people say Tony, how did this video have thumbs down on it because they're all the people out I'm blocked and they didn't win and got them they side page and they coming in soon in the video hit They hit that thumb down because they mad and Cuz I done I done blocked them. Hey listen to me. So when you block a man He is feeling gonna be hurt Shonkia, thank you. God bless you. God bless you pull out in your life. The name of Jesus He's gonna be hurt But and he gonna see you're strong You don't look petty you don't look weak and that and when you're trying to break a soul tie You got a block of person because if you don't block them, you gonna keep on seeing them You gonna keep on seeing them and every time you see them is retieing that soul tie I know you did a short video was that a short video On men giving the silent treatment. Do you feel like they are still good men possibly dealing with something? He had a drinking and gambling problem as well. Now see that's where your problem come in That's when your problem come in he got problem that's bigger than you He don't need you. He need He'd need narcotics anonymous. I mean alcohol is anonymous and he'd need gamblers anonymous. He don't need you so so When you say is he still a good man Yeah, when he if he a good man without drinking and without alcohol and gambling But when you put alcohol in gambling and silent treatment together now You got a concoction that's gonna blow up in your face. You got to run you got to run He'd need Jesus Not you and so you got to understand that don't don't make excuses for a grown man Now that what Jesus died on the cross for him for Crystal prior God bless you bless your poet in your life Should I wait for a man to say something to me first or can I pursue him if pursuing him is okay? How do I do that without looking thirsty? Okay? You knew he'll use you a new hair I got a video that I just did the other day Talking about that, but I can't remember the title But absolutely not you should not pursue a man you should not pursue a man under any circumstances Kendra God bless you. God bless. I'm proud of these seas get 10 fold hundred fold According to your faith be it unto you That's what I'm praying Shakita. God bless you. God bless you Sean bless you That's you Ashley Bless you bless you. I've been in two abusive relationships. The second ended after nine years Plus two kids left with only kids. I'm afraid when I find a new guy He will leave if and when he finds out I had restraining order and jail on them No No, no, and he don't have to find that out be honest with you. You know, that's business. That's irrelevant See what's relevant is if they gave you a life altering disease. Okay, what's relevant are The children that you're raising but a restraining order against them that that's irrelevant. You know, that's that's not something So every detail is not a detail that needs to be told but even if that does come out They don't have nothing to do with him, you know, he just see like wow you dealt with some really toxic dudes Then see the thing about it is why why y'all can't always tell a man a new man everything that you've dealt with in the past Is because when you do that You let a man know what you're willing to put up with And see most men they on they hanging in the balance and so a lot of men it's like We all have good half bad and we all just one step from one of the other So when a man comes into your life, uh-oh, and you tell him everything that you've been through with a man You let him know what you willing to put up with so now he may look at the situation and say oh, okay you all You all easy you old Gullible and naive woman. So I'm not finna give you my best. I'm finna get on over you So that's what you have to realize That you can't tell everything And and it's not gonna make him leave now. He's not gonna a man don't care about the last man He worried about how you deal with him Serita god bless you bless you I prefer to date god's way because you explain what's proper when you are In the getting to know each other stage as a christian for example, is it okay for a man to Get to know multiple women Um, I got a whole video on that and that's a whole sermon. That's a whole lesson um I think it's called how to date correctly or it might be another one but It is and when you say get to know in in them um You can't really worry about what the man doing If you want to date the way god called you to date then you have to determine what that means What that means for you So if that means for you Staying out of fornication. That's all you worry about You can't lose your sleep worrying about is he getting to know other women and all that because not like 10 times He is getting to know other women. It's a waste of your breath to ask a man Are you getting to know other women? That's a waste of your breath A man is not going to show you his hand like that and if you do slip up and ask him that and he says Yes, I am that's when you need to put your track shoes on and run because a man who really is into you He's not going to tell you about another woman. He wants you to believe you the only woman in the world Faith more god bless you god bless you bless you precious faith alone Thank you for walking in your call and mr. Gass. Hey god bless your precious Um, i'm praying he show out in your life in the name of june. Bless the lord Hey, when I say them little prayers, I be mean it be from my heart from my mouth to god's ears I be praying he Pull out a mighty blessing. You hear me and and and shout out to the young lady today It was two of y'all nine who sent me a cash out To the month. I don't I don't know how y'all find Money signed Tony gassy might have was caramel kisses that told y'all my one of my uh blessed tribe members A lady today shout out to your god bless you. She sold 200 dollars She sold 200 dollars today. God bless you. You hit me that thing floored me I said lord I don't know if taxes hit or she just blessed and highly favored I mean if you get a tax attorney still blessing highly favorable, but I say, I don't know lord What what you did to move this woman heart, but Give her a hundred fold because that right there blessed me. I was like wow Um k-13. Thanks for everything Tony. Can you bless us with a video for single moms raising boys? You've mentioned this before looking forward to it. Okay Um, I would try to do a video on that I got I don't know. I might have a whole course on that on tony gas on the academy But I don't know Keely god bless you poor. I didn't keely life. Lord bless her Bless her Sonia god bless you bless you Now that we have your cash out jojo. I so appreciate you Now y'all keep me going. I'll be on here working on on this hill clock and y'all be blessing me loss loss about a man who knows Serves god was cheated on badly by his ex Shows interest in me, but no consistent contact. Is he keeping distance because still emotionally unavailable? Hurt or playing games? If what he has told you is true, then that is very much possible That he that could very well be the reason he's keeping his distance if what he has told you is true um, but You can't wait on him. You can't wait on him and you can't allow a man to sit there and Hit you up once a week and kind of keep you on hold and and all of that you can't do that. So if if he's not heal Then He's not your man. That ain't who god got for you. Keep it moving because If you dealing with a man who is not heal hurt people hurt people So he'll end up hurting you and and you can't sit there and wait on that. Don't sit there and wait on that Caramel kisses. God bless you. That's supposed to be trying to get me a blessing. You hear me Hey, Tony's son's dad wants tax return discussed an amount while together Reduced after giving him money during holidays relationship ended in big fight in public He spit on me still asking for 500 um If if if you taking care Of your son and and he's with you all the time then I don't see a reason unless it's court ordered to give his daddy nothing because What is daddy doing? He what he gonna do with the 500? Put it go by groceries to put up for a son when his son come over there What he want to rebate on some of the money he then gave his son? And and and and he spit on you I got charging that 500 for spitting really need to be charged 5 000 for spitting on you. So Unless the court say he do some of that money I wouldn't need him worried about it. And at the same time to be honest with you, I would Be careful with that man when you if you don't give him the 500 be careful with a men My wife watching this old documentary on netflix called the trials of The trials of gabriel fernandez the tv out there so i'm reading it because he got it on pause right now The trials of gabriel fernandez and it's kind of show you what a man will do and this one I'll be trying to tell y'all how the heart of men Is and to be careful Be careful. I'm telling you now So yeah, I wouldn't be worried about that Hi, tony. I started dating my ex when I was 17. He went off to the military. He's now 25 and i'm 23 So he was 19 I broke up with him because he does not seem serious. We dated for six years. Should I go back? Absolutely not Absolutely not run Running faster you can run Anytime you gave a man six years of your life and y'all still ain't married y'all still ain't much of nothing Run run What are your thoughts on dating while separated been separated a year? Been off my bike. However, he's dragging out the divorce process intentionally to prevent me from being able to move on You know, it is what it is, you know, if you date and while you separate you're gonna be in sin You're gonna end up in sin So I wouldn't worry about it, you know, let them drag it out and look for the laws that you can Push it forward without his You know, if he if he holding it up, you should be able To have some work around with that. I know the law's got to have something for you So I wouldn't end up dating though. You could use this season as a season of healing The way you can heal and grow Natasha. God bless you God bless you show out in our life, lord Hi, tony. I'm not ready to date but guys approach me often How can I be sure I don't miss my husband in the process of growing? Well, to be honest with you, I I believe in trust in a woman's intuition And I believe the man that is for you, you're gonna feel it in your spirit when he talked to you when he approached you He you you're gonna feel it And I believe he just gonna have like a little a little outline around them like a little glow You're gonna feel it in your spirit. Hey, this the man that gonna come on out of waiting for this the man that gonna grow with You're gonna feel it in your spirit But I wouldn't if you not ready Make sure you doubling down on the work what I mean by that make sure you really really doing the work You taking the courses you reading the books you going to seminars you doing the coaching Make sure y'all visit my mentor dot life now and book a session with your coach Speech is speech. God bless you. God bless you Me and baby that have broke it off stringing me alone Cussing me out fighting sending me a photo of female block for a week But I see him tomorrow how to be strong and move on Now I can't really tell you how to be strong Because you just gonna have to be strong. But what you got to remember is you're gonna have to You're gonna have to remind yourself of all that he's done You're gonna have to remind yourself that he is a bag of trash right now And that he is not worth your time He's not worth your energy and that all you need to be focused on is trying to co-parent in a healthy way And keep it moving with your life, you know, it's not rocket science. You may need to get coaching I think a lot of times what we discount is the power of words All of my clients. It's like they just need to hear words. You just need to hear something You know, you need to hear something that somebody has said and so, you know, you you got to be able to get you a coach And and work with them. Misha. God bless you. Sure. I didn't like God bless you, you know y'all blessing me and I'm gonna tell y'all how y'all bless me What what really blessing me is youtube they put ads on your videos But um, a lot of my videos this so real I say certain words that's trigger words So they don't run the ads on there or if they do they don't compensate me And I don't get to see if it's on there or not y'all to get to see but They won't compensate me because of certain words that is said what they call demonetized So when y'all show up and be blessing me it show be blessing I was thinking the day I say man, I'm finding me a developer or app developer and create me tonic tube So I could have a members only app that I could talk about whatever I want to talk about how I want to talk about it And use all the words I want to use. I don't even curse. I don't even curse, but they still Won't let you say certain words and uh So no no jojo I need a good I need a good developer. No good app developer But not one not one old fake Oh, I developed but it came really developed now. I need a good app developer jojo and you find them Let me know I'm talking about a cold or not somebody who could build an app in k. God bless you God bless you Is there a time When it's okay for a man Is there a time where it's okay for a man neglect putting me first example? He's working two jobs 4 a.m To 8 p.m. I've expressed feeling lonely and abandoned As for flowers etc one month ago still nothing It might be for a season. It might be for a season, you know, it's a season. Well, man got to work and uh If he working but it ain't got nothing to show for it if he's not paying down debt He's not saving money. He's not investing the right way or Something like that then There's no excuse But if he just you know grinding And it's a season that he's in then you got to understand when it's a season of grinding Nk bless you etna bless you. God bless you Who is ladies Chanel bless you. Thank you coach. Tony. I really appreciate you. God bless bless you and your family a bless you 10-fold on you God bless you Merch L a bless you or poor out in her life. Bless him I have men pursuing me good candidates, but I'm not attracted. No chemistry Keep it moving. You know keep it moving. I'm tired of trying to um Tell y'all the date Looks challenge men men that you feel it looks challenge because I it ain't fair to you Because a man's shoulder ain't gonna date a look challenge woman So just keep it moving because I believe God to give you desires of your heart now If your desires of your heart fits his will So this what I mean now you can't be you can't be waiting on this perfect chisel man who looked like a a greek sculpture and Completely perfect now But if you just want somebody that look decent you could stomach him Then I believe God got that in store for you Your old videos and a podcast Have changed my life for the better. Thanks for giving up the game. You hear me? Sweet olive. God bless you. God bless. I hear you pull out in a light Keeley Keeley, you need your times 10 blessing. Keeley doesn't show it up here. You hear me? Keeley showed up Out in her life. What way should a man give of himself? What way should a man give of himself? A man should lead in love and so what that means is Is that he loves you in a way that washes you with love that you feel love and it makes you want to reciprocate to him Truthfully a man should be treating you the way if you knew this man had a daughter You know this the way he would want somebody to treat his daughter. That's how it ought to feel And he should be giving his time his energy his effort his communication Sacrifice all of those things her mark I don't know if I'm saying it right. God bless you Bless the Lord how to get closure from a relationship when your ex never apologized for hurting you blocked him on everything Have not heard from him in four months You got to give yourself closure. You got to close the door. You can't wait on closure from an ex. The ex will never give you closure crystal bell God bless you because the ex want to leave the door open recovery with amber. God bless you amber mastermind Amber who just gave that blessing. She is a coach on my mentor dot life. So it's Shannon Owens I saw Shannon on here earlier God bless you. You got to give yourself closure crystal bell bless the Lord I'm getting to know someone and we haven't talked all day today. Should I cut them off? I would give him a second chance and figure out why y'all didn't talk all day today Because he if he in the hospital if a friend in the hospital or something like that now If you talk to him and he don't have a good You know Strategy, I mean not strategy, but he don't have a good excuse now Now you getting closer to it might be time to go and cut on off So you got to realize that there Kobe heaven's mom. I'm typically only approached by older men. Hey bless you Kobe bless you I'm 35 and they are at least in their 50s. Could I be given off the wrong vibe? No, no Nope, they shoot they shot at a moving trash can, you know the trash can with the wheels on it so you can roll it to the street They'll holler at that So don't don't get caught up in that. You can't judge who what a man hollering at you Can't base that off yourself shannon. Bless you shannon bless you Shannon is a coach on my mentor dot life As well Y'all book your session with amber and shannon I've been talking to this guy For over a year and he basically hasn't been talking to me much. I asked what's going on He sent me a song and stopped talking to you That song might have been that It's hard to say goodbye. Bye boys. The men Let him go move on with your life. He taking crystal. God bless you. I'll see you Okay, crystal you might have sent the the sticker and then rip realize the put the question You hit hit the other button. Thank you. Thank you Hot on in my ex and I dated for a good month and a half Then he wanted to be exclusive. He came off so strong and three months later. He broke up with This the thing he wanted to hold me down See he what what he's doing is he treating women like like a step ladder T johnson god bless you pull out in his life or his or her life It might be a one god bless it. He he he's treating women like a step ladder. So that's that's what happened with a lot of men is He's so broken and hurt. He don't know how to be alone and I've been that man So what he'll do is he'll give you everything Give you everything be all over you, but he's looking for the one And so he got you But then he finds somebody else that something catches out about them and they give her everything Then he finds somebody else and he give her everything. So, you know, you got to just be thankful that It was that amount of time instead of something that was A year You know and hopefully you weren't on your bike. That's the lesson now if you fell on your bike That's what you got to take from that because you see how quickly that ended But if you didn't get on your bike, then you didn't lose anything t johnson. Bless you Show up show up in that life Bless him and just up and leaving what to say when a man inquires about past relationships past sexual experiences Let's close in the nicest way that you can tell him that it's none of his business In the nicest way that you can and it don't have to be nice You just you ain't got to curse him out, but you just you know, if I asked that to a woman and she said That's none of your business because I know you're not gonna tell me all your business So don't be asking me about all my past. We're in the present. I don't focus on the past I am not talking about your past So we ain't talking about my past if a woman said that to me, I'll be like, oh, okay. All right Okay Hey, how far do you power to you? You know, I that's that's I wouldn't be offended to be honest with you Sweet olive god bless your old video Okay, they just got you up there cuz of the size of your blessing already read your message T Johnson God bless you Sharon say book alerts single is not a curse and missus right I was talking to a social media person today And she told me that I need to mention that i'm an author and mention my books and courses more because she says she had she watched All a whole bunch of my videos and didn't even know I was an author But I told her you know, I don't like selling I like to come on here and give and I don't want to be selling selling selling selling selling And I want a person to get the message and eventually they decide to google me, but I am an author. I have written 17 books or more I am an author now. So I thank you sheriff for that shout out high Tony 10 plus year relationship Now he wants to be married and i'm over it. Is that normal that is that is It's not normal, but it's normal. You hear what i'm telling you so What I mean is that's happening a lot more often and that's what I try to tell me And that's what I try to tell me and all the time Don't don't take a woman for granted and drag her out because when you finally Realize that you don't have a better option out there and you tired of playing games She's gonna be over you so to be honest with you I would not settle if I were you I would just keep it moving he had his he had 10 years Had a decade To settle down and treat you like the one and now that he realized he broke busted and disgusted and i'm not necessarily talking financially I mean just emotionally spiritually or what have you now he want to lock you in But you got more to offer the world and I would not want to be with anybody in any in business In friendship or anything If they couldn't see my worth and it took them 10 years to see my worth I'd be up out of them But it's gonna be hard. It's gonna be hard It's gonna be hard Asia, thank you. God bless you. God bless you. I really appreciate that Can you make a video about knowing when you're in a situation ship? Uh, you know when you're in a situation ship now You know when you're a situation you might not want to admit it to yourself But you know when you're in a situation it's a clear distinction between a relationship and a situation ship now You know it you know it and and and you probably anyone and you just don't want to admit it to yourself But when you in a relationship and and you in love and somebody loving you down You you you know that you can't confuse that it either love or it's not Mr. Guys, when are you going to allow internet into your love and relationship seminars? Probably never probably never I just I don't come off well online. You know for me, you got to be there live. You got to be there live Live in the flesh because Yeah, the internet go to glitching and you hear one sentence and don't hear the next sentence Then you hold and want this last sentence against me. So I just reward the people who make it on out And I'll do internet sessions now, but I probably never live stream from from an event that just ain't I'm not that techie. I don't I'm really on try to do all that what everybody trying to do now You got to go make it to a live event or Talk to an event planner and bring me to you My daughter's father and I broke up when I was seven months pregnant he now He now after one year later Had a small heart attack and cried on the phone saying he wants his family back Had a chick for nine months Now you had that heart attack now you're feeling sorry No No Let them talk to the lord. Let them talk to the lord this see a lot of times when God trying to let trying to reach somebody you got to get out the way You got to get out the way somebody falling. Anybody hit rock bottom That's where they're gonna meet the lord at and so you you got the He wants you when that heart was was ticking and kicking the right way Not in the skip to beat now. He wants you. No, brother. No, brother. Sit right on in it Sit right on in it Tomorrow god bless you. I typically do tony g marathons on friday. I gave up on netflix The talks with tony podcast was fired too. You know, I want to bring that podcast back I'm just trying to find the time and I'll be honest with you You got the you have to utilize your time in the right ways and in the podcast It was taking a lot of time, but it wasn't really a smart on the business side of things just because That's different like you too got so many advertisers that you can have some Touchy subjects and still Have some advertisers on a podcast with my type of content The it's just really big brands and they really don't they're not trying to sponsor, you know stuff that's too You know too touchy too real Too too much language Miss jones god bless you lord bless us show up in our life You are truly a blessing. I have a daughter and we'll arm her fully with your teaching. Thanks for answering my question as well Hey, no problem. No problem No problem Caramel kisses now. I don't know how caramel kiss got my uh cash out But somehow she got it. I might have gave it to her one time. She asked me Listen hill I used to turn down blessings and lord then then then lord put some on my heart one time And said tony, you know When you trying to bless somebody don't let them talk you out of it because if they talk you out of it You blocking your own blessing. So I I stopped turning down blessing. Lord, some of you got to be able to receive Nordia Nordia god bless you Hi tony talking to a guy for seven months Lives in another state. I feel a connection, but not sure he feels it He recently decided to send me a gift for my birthday. Is that a significant Or meaningful Um, he's sending you a gift. It means something it means something and it's but but it don't mean everything It don't mean everything don't mean a whole lot. So don't look too deep into it now because it's other people There's some tricksters and some gamers and some players that'll send you a gift too Just to get you to drop them guard down a little more So somebody I had a auntie like that. She'll give you she'll give you a dollar To get you some soda the next week. She want 20 dollar from you Oh, you ain't got 20 I just gave you some money last week And now you can't loan me 20 And I'm like, I didn't ask you for that dollar that you gave me and you gave me a dollar now you want 20 and so some people do you like that and so I just not my saying that that same auntie used to call her The police on my grandma and tell them she's selling drugs at the house Grandma won't sell no drug So yeah, something you got to watch them take your time But the the reason why you're falling is because that's how you fall When you're talking to somebody without intimacy involved and you just building as friends Ashley god bless you Show up in a life lord for the first time. I'm not in here to ask a question I'm here to tell you. Thank you for your videos and books have shown me how to love myself and know my value Not seeking men. Hey, bless you. I'm glad it's reaching somebody Sabrina Tony thank you for all you do newbie here. Where can I order your books? amazon.com If you got a smartphone typically if it's an iPhone you got iBooks or iTunes you could just type in my name Barnes and Noble Bless you. Thank you for that blessing to Debbie Debbie care God bless you God bless you. I don't wonder about how the thing say 99 999 for some of y'all and then some of y'all it's a round number That's kind of interesting how that worked God bless you. What does it mean? When man thinks it's fair and okay to go 50 50 financially In a long term relationship um When you go on 50 50 in a long term relationship now you got a couple issues there Okay, when you say long term you didn't say how long that is. Okay, but Okay, the singles next singles conference might be April 10th. I haven't added it yet But i'm doing the life coach certification April 11th in Atlanta, so I may depending on if i'm filling up to it at the singles workshop on April 10th But what you gotta realize when you say long term relationship if a man has been with you for more than 12 months And you getting closer to 18 months and he hasn't gotten engaged to you. He hasn't asked you to marry him Then you cross 24 months Yes, it's gonna be in in atl You just go to tonigashio.com for slash events He crossed 24 months and I said you say long term now The deeper you get The less that he loves you to be honest with you so The deeper you get the less he loves you So now if you say if long term mean more than three years That's why he really trying to go 50 50 he really trying to go 50 50 because He see you as A roommate not a wife You see my wife She earns a living from our companies But I don't ask her to take her money And pay bills with it, you know, she take her money and she earned a good living She earned a good amount of money And a good amount of money now Uh, you know master's degree phd level amount of money that she earned, but she don't pay a single bill That just come out of the household income You hear me so the money comes in She get a paycheck And then the money that's left in the account that pay the bills Her money is so she can go shopping You see what I mean is so she could go shopping She could be a blessing to her friends and family She could you know, so in the people life she she was taking by me some gifts out of her money But that's what it's for because that's my wife. That's my queen. I want to provide I want to take care of her Now if I saw her as a roommate if I saw her as a friend with benefits I want her to take Her income and and be paying You know be putting up But that's not the case Nadia god bless you god bless. Hold on Nadia. Let me let me tell Nicole bless you too real quick Nicole i'ma get to your question real quick. Let the cold show that they're them tags ahead of you Just was blessed like that going and coming left and right up and down pull out another everybody like lord blessing Nadia fell for a man who I didn't think I would He dated other women when we hang out we connect His ex might be around. How do I tell him I fell for him? You don't you don't and you need to stop falling for me Y'all got to stop falling for me and see what you got to do is What's happening is When you with a man just be with the man when you with him meaning when you in his presence when you on the phone with him When you're not on the phone with him Don't be fantasizing and by him Don't be fantasizing by him. Don't be you know thinking about the man Be busy working on your business working on your blog working on your brand working on your body working on your brain Be doing everything else and not thinking about him because that's when a man not with you. He's not thinking about you When a man is not with you He is not thinking about you but see women y'all give so much credit to a man And you be thinking about them so don't fall for a man until you know he has fallen for you and then Don't tell a man you have fallen for him. Let him tell you he has fallen for you Let him tell you and still don't tell him you have fallen for him Until you truly truly believe he has fallen for you based on his actions. He showed you Nicole god bless you. God bless you. You must be a nurse practitioner or something That's a big blessing a couple y'all and showed out on there And you know and even I'll tell you what even for those you who Bless with a dollar. It reminds me of the lady in the bible who gave her two pins It it means more to me than you understand and I want you to really really understand that because God trying to say something to me And i'm trying to hear it about obedience and and i'm gonna go in a little tangent right here is I get a lot of tv Interviews a lot of tv opportunities But i'm too real for tv Because they have a certain agenda on tv and I don't condone the tom foolery that they be on And I say lord, well, how am I ever gonna earn a living serving your people every day all day long if I Can't get on tv and water down my message and earn that level of money And then god said to me listen. I got you just give the message that I gave you to give And i'ma have i'ma send the people to be a blessing to you so that you can do what you're doing full time And I say all right i'ma do it And y'all and that's what y'all showing me that that god ain't tell me no lie. So I just thank y'all Nicole bless you met someone he found out I recently started following your platform and he went ghost He was terrified of all I'd realized about him obviously Put some respect on tony gaskin name. Hey god bless you. Hey, that's good. Let him go ghost Let him go ghost But that that's what it is That's what it is My ex and I were together for two years Been separated for six months and we communicate every day He recently mentioned Men in our conversation. I went along with it and he got upset. Don't know what to do um You you're kind of playing yourself. You're kind of playing yourself Dino because you got a soul tie. You got a soul tie. He has a soul tie And so he's talking to you every day, but that don't mean he's not entertaining and or even sleeping with another woman That don't mean he ain't in a whole another situation, but he wants you to remain stuck So he talking and dealing with you Now you made the mistake of telling him about other men and the thing about it is he's not really upset Because what does he expect he's not he didn't ask you to To be his woman to be his girlfriend and to be exclusive and and come back and show you that he a real man and that he's living right and doing right so He's not really upset. It's just an ego hurt and he's just doing that to kind of bother you So what you got to do is you're gonna have to decide how long you're gonna keep doing this You was with the man for for for two years Y'all been apart for six months. He ain't come back and Throwing himself to you and showing you that he is a new man and he wanted to make it work then Come on now, you know, he he's not really about you He really ain't about you and you got to realize that and you got to move on with your life He just got a soul tie and the thing about it is men a lot of men don't come and get this right here What you get him? So a lot of men have never even heard the term soul tie So that they have that stomach ache and they can't eat some days and they can't sleep some nights And they don't know what it is. They don't know that it's an emotional bond It's an emotional tie to their ex because of the times that y'all shared and the Releases from the brain that your interaction with him used to give him and he doesn't understand that His body is feeding for having withdrawals and missing it. He doesn't understand what's going on So that's why he reaches out to talk to you because it soothes it because it his brain gives his Body the same chemical release the dopamine and serotonin You know, he's getting those releases and so that's why he's there talking to you But don't really want to be with you. So it's kind of like you like a pain pill Beauty be Daniels. God bless you. Thank you so much. Show up in the night Thank you, Tony. You are such a blessing I'm gonna manifest my future husband by the end of this year due to your videos. I know what I want I'm claiming it in the name of Jesus. Hey I'm claiming it to you and to be honest with you That's the mindset you've got to have in order to attract that in your life Not kill it. This is the third time seeing you So I'm praying the Lord Show enough show up on your dough step. I don't know if this a accident and you don't know me. Don't be going and filing no Charge back not kill it Because I don't know if you didn't figure out how to put the question in there the first two times and now you On third time or you just trying to get a blessing to me. Either way, God bless you. Let me get back to your question I'm trying to see these when they pop up So y'all got to forgive me because they go across the top and they They move off the side and they they disappear on me. So I'm hoping I miss nobody Please help me figure out how to navigate dating after being divorced eight years and celibate Want someone my age but only younger ones approach and the older ones seem to want younger women That's a tough place to be in That's a tough place to be in but what you got to realize about that is that It just means that you have to increase your engagement rate So what that means is is that you got to get out of the house more You got to utilize and these just random examples If I go on meetup.com or a or a local site like that that has groups Like an entrepreneur group or retiree group or divorcee group Singles group and they'll have meetings once a month You know, I'm on there for a podcasting group and they'll have meetings and in that podcasting group It's men and women Florida podcasters if I was single I could go there and one of the women in there probably could be single You see what I mean? Somebody say local volunteer groups create a routine every Saturday from 10 a.m. The noon you at starbucks So then you at the internet cafe you at barns and noble Have a gym routine three to five days a week you at the gym And you working out so you getting out you getting around And you out and about and so you increasing your rate of interaction Because when you in a in a niche market Meaning that when you a divorce say You're a certain age you want a certain type of man You got to be meeting a lot more men to where if you just wanted to run of the mill every day man You wouldn't have to do too much you could walk outside to your mailbox and meet him But the the smaller that pool get the more you got to get out Ebony j god bless you Hey, tony. Thank you for all you do. Can you speak on long distance relationships? It's the good and the bad okay with long distance relationships It can be amazing because you get to build on real friendship, which is a firm foundation So that's the good part the bad part I hate to say this The bad part is hard to uh trust a man further than you could throw It it it It's just it's extremely hard to be in a relationship along this relationship with a man Unless he has pristine character So you got to make sure that he has amazing character Amazing character and if he doesn't have amazing character Like and when I say amazing character, I mean is he doing things that's detrimental to his health To his mindset and when I'm talking about smoking drinking gambling nasty movies Things like that The more character flaws he has the less of a chance it is of him being faithful So he got to be a really good man for for that long distance to work Andriana god bless you. Thank you so much I have been dating my current boyfriend I told my wife I was gonna try to do two hours the night of my phone and stay on just because Some people be having to go some people be late and it's just the amount of questions I I get I'll try to block out um two questions two hours the night like church service because Wednesday night So this this my church on the the minister on my youtube Nah I have been dating my current boyfriend on and off for four years Okay on and off Okay He's perfect Oh, he's perfect I am used to dating hood dudes and have always loved them because of the thrill I'm dying of boredom. What should I do? Okay Well, I think you missed a couple things right there andriana Because it's been off and on off and on that's a key word A relationship is not off and on okay, and that might be why you're dying Aborder because it's off and on Number two has been four years So He's not perfect because a man who is for you He's not gonna let you go four years without being his wife. He's not gonna do it So you you are effectively wasting your time You are unfortunately wasting your time because you're trying to force a situation it you can have a man That's not a a bad boy. That's not a dope boy. That's still a lot of fun That's still a lot of energy. That's still a good man. It's just a good man. Don't mean old, you know lame square meaning He's no fun. He's not, you know Spontaneous. He's not, you know, I'm not a thug. I'm not in the streets, you know And me and my wife have us a good old time And so a man still can get you hot get you going without being a bad boy So when you got a man that's boring you and it's four years and it's off and on That's just he's not that into you. He might like men To be honest with you in today's time He's just not that into you because a man who into you he's gonna turn it up You ain't gonna be bored now 20 plus year ended four kids Recently learned he had a child with x during Our second year Which hurt me I'm ambitious Money earning bill paying great mother Moving on Moving on single and irritated with the thought of starting over That's a big lesson and we'll now see listen to listen to me. What's your name again? Robin. God bless you. Thank you. Thank you for that blessing Thank you for that blessing now listen to me Robin When you go through 20 years You didn't go through that for nothing. You hear me when you go through 20 years You got to give back from that You got to give back from that. So what that means is you got to be able You got to write a book Okay, you got to start a a non-profit organization Where you raising money in the community and having black tie gallows and events to raise money To help women who feel trapped in their relationship Even working women successful women like yourself Help them have first and last month's rent to lead a relationship help them have coaching or counseling See when you get 20 years, you got to turn that pain into purpose You can't just try to say oh, I'ma just move on single and try to get back started That might be why you're frustrated because you're gonna have to do some with that experience But other than that you're gonna have to heal It's gonna take a lot of healing gonna take a lot of learning a lot of coaching a lot of working Ebony G. God bless you. Thank you Tony. I'm in I'm in a rocky three-year marriage Purchase and looking forward to reading make it work also have A woman's influence pre-order blessing. Hey, thank you so much. Now. I'll tell you what when you read Make it work read every chapter get you a notebook I should have made a notebook that go with it get you a notebook And write in it for every chapter take notes highlight the sections you need That make it work It's coming from what I call a perfect marriage That's what I call it. That's subjective But it's just how I see my marriage because I it ain't no stress from me You ain't no stress from my wife. So I call it perfect Now ain't nothing technically perfect But I call it perfect because I just don't see how it could get better So I wrote make it work from that with that insight with that advice that got us to this place And so I say that to say when you read that it could turn some things around for you in your relationship I really believe Thank you for your time and obedience to god. You bench god bless you now. You gave another big blessing Now bless you lord pour out in her life. Let somebody find her cash out tonight Somebody said serita Good question. Let me see Well, serita Serita is there a healthy balanced way to guard your heart Without being closed off or seeming cold Yes, there is but see there's the thing There's the thing which y'all might not want to hear Okay The really the the the only thing you have to worry about Listen to this y'all make this simple now make this simple The only thing you got to worry about when it comes to guarding your heart is keeping your legs closed That's it That's it If you keep your legs closed that is guarding your heart. That's guarding your heart Because anything else is really just a friend that you getting that you getting to know The only time it's more than friends is when y'all sleeping together and when I say let's close what I mean is What I mean is nothing sexual So nothing nothing nothing oral nothing in of course That's guarding your heart because other than that y'all just talking and bonding That's no different than you and your coworker talking and bonding you and your Cousin or family member the only thing about a lover is that y'all have a romantic interest And y'all have a goal Y'all have a goal of being together. That's what separates it But when you lose your heart truly is when you give your body away because that's what consummates the relationship That's what confirms it. See when when when the good books say and and then they knew each other That mean they came together. That's when it's confirmed for that It's just conversation and friendship building a firm foundation for the relationship So and this is what I want y'all to understand when I met my wife She a kiki kiki kiki I mean she was so nice and so friendly And so full of life and personality that I assumed as a man that it was going to be easy to sleep with And then when I tried to make that move I saw a completely different side of her She got serious and she stuck it to me No, I told you no, I was like wow How can the same woman who was so kind and nice and sweet and laughing and talkative Be this wrong about her standards? I was like wow Bless be gonna make the gonna make the t-shirts I made a t-shirt today. It might be up under the video up under some of my videos You know where you see that self love shirt if you click on that it might take you to my store I'm finna be wearing this t-shirt somebody gave me an idea yesterday And the t-shirt say caveats and nuances I just think that's gonna have people looking crazy when I wear that to the mall and they see caveats and nuances What that mean? Yeah, he just he sound deep. Hmm. He sound like he Caveats and nuances. He sound like a poet. You know, I'm just gonna be wearing that shirt round Because the new vocabulary word he hit me one day on the video Diane god bless you Bless you was supposed to be the future wife after Z manipulation I don't know if that Z meant something else after The manipulation and controlling behaviors found out he chose drugs over our commitment. How can I heal? The same way is the same way. Ain't no special healing It's doing the work what you're doing right now Go on tonic gas academy take the courses. It's a free course on there 10 steps to self love Doing the work. You just got to do the work. Ain't no tricks about it. Ain't there ain't no magic formula Of, you know, chando cyber da bada all that healing healing come Ain't none of that. You just got to do the work. That's it. Put one foot in front of the other Crystal god bless you bless you Husband almost dodging marriage counseling Not sure why now that was my finger pop now. Don't y'all think somebody with passing gas Husband not almost dodging marriage counseling. Not sure why I'm praying fasting worshiping to get answers from god doesn't want to be held accountable Now, let me ask you something Doesn't want to be held accountable Only you can hold them accountable only you can hold them accountable and this way this is what I want you to understand Because a lot of times I talk to people all the time and they say i'm waiting on my husband to change But you it's some changes you can make It's some changes you can make So what I mean is it's some things that you're reinforcing And and this what I also want you to understand is the reason why god raised up prophets Is because he understand every everybody won't be able to hear him He understand that he not that god the spirit don't speak clearly to everybody So that is why that's why I try to tell people people say people say all the time Oh, you don't need nothing but god you don't need nothing but god but god put people in place To translate that's that's why y'all go to church Because that's supposed to be somebody that god called to deliver the word to you In layman terms in a way that you could understand it But so while you sitting there and you praying and you fasting God might really just be telling you listen you need to go talk to a professional That I have called that's called by me that has the wisdom knowledge and understanding to help you understand what you need to do Relationally because my holy bible does not go that deep Into the caveats and nuances of your relationship So you might need to go talk to one of my Called sons or daughters Who can speak to you With godly wisdom with my wisdom because what you on your knees crying and praying But you not gonna hear what i'm trying to tell you because i'm not talking to you Like that so you apply wisdom and go talk to a professional And that's why I tell people all the time do not be so Heavenly minded that you know earthly good You've got to just it could be as simple as getting on the phone with a christian Relationship coach and could help you come up with a couple of tweaks you know God has changed my life, but it's through the words written by apostle paul written by Solomon you know it's through the words of one of his prophets one of his apostles And so But it's the word of god So understand that it's some couple tweaks you can make that can turn everything around But you will not know that on your own Met a 50 year old keeler bath and body body keel keel god bless you So not so Met a 50 year old guy talk daily now. He only speaks one time a day Now he speaks if that's by phone Then that's not a bad thing if it's by text. It's a bad thing That's a bad thing Let me see make sure I don't miss nobody I'm anticipating my phone to go dead in a minute, but the 20% ain't popped up yet So it might be because I got it off and just got on the wi-fi. I don't know Bellary Bellary forgive me if i'm saying your name wrong a little country over here But thank you so much for your blessing Playing praying god show up in your life Thank you for being the servant man that you are may god bless you real big a thank you your blessing is a blessing. Thank you Is it okay to pray and ask god to reconcile the relationship you believe was meant to be But the timing was off Bless angel. Thank you for dropping that question. That's a good question. What I want you to understand is when when It's okay to pray it is okay to pray But you got to understand that the answer that you won't might not be the answer you get What you also got to understand is that it can happen but God will make it happen It's gonna happen like me and my wife She broke up with me because I wasn't treating her the way she needed to be treated. I wasn't the man that I first showed her I didn't pray about her coming back into my life She didn't pray about me coming back into her life. It just happened It happened. So god will make it happen Already if it's meant to be it's gonna happen because your prayers don't make god move It don't make him do something that ain't in his will so And and the thing about it is is you have to be careful about praying for what you want And you got to pray and say lord I want your will if it be your will Let it come back I got a quote that went viral and it said, um Lord If it is not your will Let it slip through my grasp And give me the strength not to worry about it Well, give me the peace not to worry about it said something like that And uh That's what your prayer gotta be lord. If this is not your will give me the peace to move on Because you don't want to sit there and be praying and interceding about something that god ain't got for you And this is another thing I want you to understand everybody to understand love transcends time People say can it be the right person in the wrong time? No Because love transcends time if it's the right person, it'll be the right time And so what I mean by that is When it's the right person, they're gonna get right They're gonna get right you gonna get right And if it's the right time if it was not and if they refuse then it's gonna It'll circle back around and it's gonna be the right time But you ain't got to sit there and be interceding and bloody knees and All that begging and plea if it's meant to be it's gonna be And it's gonna be the right time and that's why I tell people there's no such thing as right person wrong time We say that all the time but True letter. God bless you. There is consistency everywhere, but emotionally I'm gonna see long distance relationship active at first Now inconsistent That's the point. I was making earlier about long distance relationship with men When it's inconsistent, you got to go on about your business. You got to go on about your business Hey, I only got 15 more minutes on here. Now I left my phone down before the end But I told white we had our time together earlier today And um watching our Netflix and chill and I told I was I asked her she said sure you could work Sir and uh, so we uh, I got 15 minutes left But what I said earlier about that long distance when when a man inconsistent you got to run Because he didn't find somebody in short distance Or he didn't find somebody else in long distance that just tickled his fancy a little more Don't play with it. Don't waste your time You're blocking your blessing because your husband could be at the gas station tomorrow But if you so focused and tied up in that long distance relationship, that's inconsistent You're gonna ignore your husband at the gas station tomorrow Should I continue dating a man who seems to have trust and abandonment issues? His mother was a drug addict father had multiple trip children by multiple women And ex fiance cheated on him That was dangerous road to travel I tell you that because you might end up up the up the road Without gas or up the creek without a powder. So to be honest with you To continue dating a man like that. He needs to be actively healing. He need to be actively Working he needs to be showing you that he's healing. He's growing and he's working because if he's not And he's looking like he heard and he's not trying to grow I hadn't seen that happen before I hadn't seen that happen and what happened is woman give all her time She give years of her life. She ended up having his children and everything and he won't give a rain Because he was hurt so bad Striving so God bless you. Thank you for that blessing. Thank you What advice would you give to married couples in keeping things fresh? It's so easy to take your spouse for granted and get in a routine Lastly, do you think a man can be in love with one woman long term? Now that's a great question Now the last chapter of make it work chapter 22 is called keep it hot maybe and I talk about that and The thing about it is is one of the main things you got to do is you got to keep on dating You got to keep dating. So me and my wife try to go on a date every week Like we had us a weekend planned in Miami this weekend and um My wife she said maybe we ought to revisit that. I don't know some came up or money went to looking funny or something I don't know what came up, but um Was it this weekend? Yeah this weekend. Oh my birthday next weekend I'm thinking is this weekend But you got to keep on dating you got to keep dating you got to keep doing what you did to get The person both of y'all got to do that And and yes a man could be in love with one woman now It's always going to be temptation out there. It's going to be some wandering eyes. It's going to be some struggle But yes, he can be in love with one woman And long term and the way I do it Is I just false I find something to fall in love with my wife about you know, I rat nine She went and got a lashes done. I'm in love them lashes. I just like look in the eyes Got eyebrows done Like to look in the eyebrow, you know falling love that eyebrow. I'm always squeezing on me some booty Every time I get close to it. I'm grabbing a handful. You hear me touching on everything Falling love with everything I can and that's what the man have to understand That you got to fall in love with what your woman got And instead of looking and lusting after what another woman got that your woman might not have And so what happened is the devil gonna try you and this is what I do This is what I do personally because I'm a visual person if I see a woman. She looked real good And she looked real good. She got a nice body. What I do is I picture I picture a boob on And when I see that coming on out Or that booty that had a nice shape on it Yeah May throw up in my mouth and so I had to do that to create now that sound crazy to y'all But I had to do that to create To keep that devil off my back. Oh, yeah, that sounds crazy to you And uh, I remember homeboy in college. He used to say something. He used to say uh He'll see a woman with a with a big booty and he'll say look like a Buddhist thing And and ever since I heard that I just always if I see a woman and her body looked real good. I just go to I'm stank and I just make that up in my mind, you know, he said And so these little tricks that men are taking do And I know that's too real for you. I know that's too real for you, but That's what I do, you know, if I think Beyonce cute I see a long piece of boo boo coming out of there and I See up there on that stage and they look nasty outfit and I see that Any kind of lust that wanting to come the Lord and shut it down And because see that's what I try to tell y'all about when you move in too fast with somebody When you move in with somebody that you don't love you don't want to smell they stuff They'll stank in bathroom and they spraying that flower lice all on top of it and it's been like Stank flowers you don't want to smell that until you in love That's why I tell y'all stop moving in until you're ready to get married So that's what I do Because I love my wife. So ain't nothing about her gonna turn my stomach But a strange woman I could think about anything it's gonna turn my stomach TL Jay Alexis. God bless you. He took me on a beautiful b-day trip to Sonoma Now Sonoma now that sound good. I ain't been there where that's at Sonoma. That's in Italy or that's in California I need to take the geography class because I'm trying to think Sonoma sound good now But he didn't talk about our future at all. Should I let it go after five years? Okay, five years Y'all sis. It's time. Let me see. Let me see TL Jay Alexis time to let it go It's time to let it go. It's time to let it go. I'm telling if he's over the age of 25 It's time to let it go just because That's Sonoma is the body a little more time. Oh, Sonoma in Arizona Arizona beautiful night beautiful and hot now. It is hot out there. So take that back. He should have took you to somewhere else Arizona is hot but that's the body a little extra time but And I hate to tell y'all this because it's hard to hear But when a man go to stringing you out, it's over three years. It's really because okay my 20% battery remaining Then uh popped up Y'all forgive my 20% battery popped up now. So I'm phone getting ready to die I put it on low low power mode, but I don't know what that means When a man go to string you out over three years and he over the age of 25 It's really the reason why is because he's unsure about you A lot of times men want to say oh because my money's not right Oh, because I want to have everything in order before marriage. Oh, I want to be financially all that all that is is lies It's all lies because listen here if in a man meet a woman When okay till that sonoma is wine country in northern california So what y'all spoke y'all arizona what people be loud and wrong arizona arizona arizona That's in northern california. That's what I be trying to tell y'all about y'all in the comments A lot of times be loud and wrong. I ain't mad at your arizona. Y'all got me. Thanks sonoma arizona sonoma in northern california Got me out here looking like who shot john and forgot to kill him So I'll be talking to somebody tomorrow. Hey, you've been to sonoma arizona and sonoma in northern california That's what I be trying to tell you that's what y'all got to be careful reading comments Now listen what I was telling you when a man starts stringing you out over three years He's playing with you because he's not sure about you He's not sure and everything else is alive because listen to me a man could be broke busted and disgusted But if he meet a woman that he feel is his wife He getting married he could have Lent in his pocket To rub together He is getting married. So all that oh, I need to have my money in order. Oh, I need to have it Oh, no, it's that he is scared to death about choosing you because he don't know if you the one So you got to choose yourself and say listen listen playboy If you don't know if I'm the one in five years I'm up out of here because I don't want somebody it's like going on a job interview And they and they saying hey come in every week or come in every day To keep talking about this job And we'll let you know in five years if you're gonna get the job But come on in every day. You ain't getting no pay But come on in every day so we could keep talking about it But why are you tough? But why are you here? We'll have you do some work Do some work so we could see how you work Let's see how you work every day And ain't no pay now. Ain't no pay ain't no guarantees. Ain't no benefits But come on in here How long are you gonna do that? On a job On a job. This is what we're doing in our relationships You showing up every day you doing the work, but you have no commitment. No guarantee No until deaf does us part. Okay. That's cool for a year in dating because you're getting some conversation But after that, no, it's time to get going. It's time to get going Keely good night Tony. Thank you for your advice turning 58 on march 10. So i'm gonna try to get Back out there. God bless you. God bless you. Keely you're gonna look a day past 38 now i'm trying to see how i look at you. I'm a good eye You don't look at day past 38 God bless you You're doing good. The lord kept you looking young. God bless you keep going and two days after my birthday my birthday march 8th And don't y'all go to trying to read up what march 8th mean and what a posse is because It's lying on me anyways if it's saying something bad on what the lord say. I am not no horoscope and all that zodiac I ain't got long. I got four minutes now I got to go because tomorrow I got to be up recording my audio book for a woman's influence If you have not pre-ordered, please do it come up april 7th and Got to have them pre-orders in so that they know how much to print Can you give tips on how to properly vet therapists? They are expensive, but I've heard they can help how to find the right one quickly to be honest with you The work is really done by you so You could go to any therapist. You can't really vet them. You got to pay the money, but you're investing in yourself So you're not losing anything by investing into yourself So you really read a person bio read a blog post. That's why on my mentor dot life We have therapists on there who are also coaching on our home page. We got therapists on there And you may not need therapy you may be able to just do coaching And or you could do both some people do both my clients client that I coach today she's in therapy and coaching So it's it's an investment in you you you never be 100% sure you could read a person blogs you can look at their online content And just try to feel their spirit and use your intuition But it's worth the the chance the opportunity tina b god bless you I truly appreciate you allowing god to use you to help women I've sent you a lengthy question via email and received the response But no answer to my question. How can I send a question to be addressed in a video? Uh, you got to send it to inbox at tony gaskins.com. You probably send it to support so they don't really answer questions there And uh, you got to send it to inbox at tony gas.com But I'm I can't promise you to get it addressed in a in a video just because it's a lot of them in there Um, she key to that job interview analogy a gem. Hey, that just hit me tonight. That hit me tonight. Thank you lord Thank you lord. Just drop that on me. I got to use that again now. Since you done stamped it too I got to use that thing again. I I've been out here 13 years and I ain't thought of that Thank you lord for moving like that. That's what coming on here live It's like a comedian going on their stage and working on they said you hear me lord Just gave that to me tonight. I'm finna be using that India god bless you Finances shouldn't be an excuse to not get married married certificates in most states are less than a hundred dollars in florida It's 96. Thank you for your will a god bless. You know when I got my marriage certificate in florida was 75 Now they're going up a little bit, but I didn't have a dime to my name But we had love and then with love loved and built what we have today Still ain't got hardly much money, but the lord moving He a moving $60 in illinois for marriage life. Look at them Look at them. It's just an excuse me and you Because I'll tell you Beyonce walk up on Thomas. You want to get married here? He had run up there with no clothes on they ain't got a A pot to pee in and a be up there saying I do it just depends on does he want that woman? That's all it is My question is too lengthy to send via super chat tina b You know what? That's a sign of tina b. It means that you need a coaching session So everybody on here, please visit my mentor dot life I'm on I'm one of the coaches on there. Somebody told me my schedule booked up I didn't know how far it's booked up, but it's several other coaches on you saw amber on here tonight She's a coach on there shannon was on here tonight. She's a coach on there There's several coaches on there starting at $25 an hour So my mentor dot life not dot calm. Now it's dot life. The link should be in the description But thank y'all so much. I've been on here two hours I'm about to drain. I got to go. God bless you. God bless you. Thank you and we'll talk soon