 Do you actually want to change your life? Reading books isn't going to change your life. Watching YouTube videos like this isn't going to change your life. Going to countless seminars isn't going to change your life. They help, they can motivate you, they can give you ideas, but they're not actually going to change your life. If you're new here, I'm Sarah and I created this channel to help you create a more fulfilling and beautiful and loving and positive life with a dash of spirituality. And today, I'm going to explain to you what to do so you can actually implement changes in your life that are going to change it for the better instead of just consuming all of this information and nothing changes, nothing happens. So if you're anything like me, which if you're following me on this channel, you probably are. You read a lot of books, you watch a lot of YouTube videos, you listen to a lot of podcasts, you journal, you go to seminars, you do all the things, but sometimes as much as we're diving in into this information to live in positive and more filling and spiritual lifestyle, a lot of times it doesn't seem like our reality is actually changing. So in this video, I want to explain to you why. And there might be some hard truths that I'll try not to offend you, but you might need to hear this. You might. So what's the secret? It's doing the work. Well, okay, Sarah, what the hell does that mean? It means a lot of things. So the first step is taking accountability for yourself. If you're not willing to take accountability and to look at yourself and dissect yourself for figuring out the way you are, what triggers you, why you handle things a certain way, why you react a certain way, then just stop the video. Because if you're not willing to actually look at yourself and admit responsibility for being the way you are and scenarios coming to you because of the way you are, then you are not ready to implement changes. You have to own up to it and take control of your life. And you can't do that if you're still in victim mode. So for those of you that aren't ready, I'll give you a few seconds to click off. And while you're hanging in there, don't forget to like and subscribe so we can hang out again next week. All right, if you're still here, you're ready. You know that you create your reality. You know that you're in control of your life and you know that you can change it. You just don't know how. And that's a beautiful place to be because all you can do is learn and go up because how are you supposed to fix or change something if you don't want to? If you're not willing to look yourself in the face and be like, I did this, I did this. I think the easiest way to change your life for the better is to implement some sort of shadow work. And I know if you're watching this channel and you've probably heard that like what the hell is shadow work? How do I do it? Cause I've been there. You know, I've totally been there. When I started on my spiritual journey a few years ago, I kept hearing that term shadow work. I'm like, okay, what the hell does that mean? So I'm gonna give you a straight line way to get into shadow work and figure out how to make these long lasting changes. So the easiest way to do this is one, you have to question everything. You know, you have to get in the pattern and the habit of questioning why you do things, why you think things, why you feel a certain way in a certain situation, why you're reacting that way. And this can range from little things like getting road rage to big things like reacting to something your mom or your spouse or your friend said. So an easier way to ask this is what are things that trigger you? And what do I mean by triggering? What is something that makes you feel, even if it's just a little bit, even if it's a slight mood shift, what's something that makes you a little bit angry or annoyed or sad or frustrated or uncomfortable or bothered or any of these emotions that are not pleasant to us. Anything that we would tend to want to stay away from, you actually have to look that emotion in the eye because it's trying to tell you something. So what you have to do is when one of these emotions comes up, you have to peel another layer and figure out, well, why is this emotion coming up? Because there are so many people out there that don't get road rage. So why do you? And it's the easy answer to just say, oh, well, a lot of people get road rage. It's normal. But that doesn't address why you get it and what has led you to get it and how to fix that. Do you know how much more pleasant my life has become since I learned to contain my road rage where it barely ever affects me anymore? It is like such a big difference that it's such a small thing. So imagine the large scale of what the bigger things in your life can change for you in the long run if you start with the little things and make your way out to the big things. So here's the thing, we've talked about how what other people do and say isn't your problem, right? Well, it's the reverse too. What you think and what you do is not anyone else's problem. You know, it's not someone else's fault that they're triggering you. I mean, if you think about it, think about all of the things going on in the world, right? Some things will trigger me, but won't trigger you or vice versa. And that is because of the different experiences we have had growing up into unlock why we get triggered by something to fix it and heal it so we don't get triggered by it. You have to figure out why it is that you get triggered by it. So I'll give you an example here. I dated a guy for a few years, okay? And it was a very, very toxic relationship and he was a very mentally abusive person to me. That being said, he never laid a finger on me physically and I don't believe he ever would have. Now in his mind, because he was physically abused as a child by his parents, through his scope of life, he knew it was bad because of his experience to hit another person, so he would never hit me, okay? But because he didn't heal what he had gone through when he was younger and he knew it wasn't okay to hit someone and cause him that pain, it came out of him and projected out of him in different ways where he was emotionally and mentally abusive to me. So if you're not learning how to heal and dig deep and peel these onion layers out of yourself, it's going to come out in all of these contorted ways that sometimes can spiral out of control and it will affect your relationship with yourself and with other people. You know, so my biggest tip here is that you have to ask why. Why are you handling something that way? If you start looking at the world and realizing that it's not against you, it's not something that you're doing against you, it's just something that involves completely around them, it'll start to be less triggering. Say for example, you're in a relationship where your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend, when they got mad at you, they ignored you, okay? They ignored your calls, they ignored your texts, they wouldn't talk to you, just completely cut you off for however long. And then eventually you go out of that relationship, you get into a new, very beautiful and healthy relationship and one day you send your person, you know, your partner a text message and two hours go by and you don't get a response from them. And all of a sudden you start getting a little panicky you're like, oh, I wonder if this person's mad at me and blah, blah, blah, and you start kind of going down that rabbit hole, stop and ask yourself, why am I feeling triggered? And then what you'll do is you'll end up tracing it back to the fact that in your previous relationship, the silent treatment meant that someone was mad at you wherein this new relationship, it might not necessarily mean that. And then maybe eventually an hour later, you hear from your person, they were stuck in a work meeting, they were doing this, they overslept, blah, blah, whatever, and you realize there was really no reason to get triggered and the only reason that you did get triggered is because of something that happened in your past. So then moving forward, each time something like that happened, you can take peace and understand and know that no, it's not because they're mad at me, they're just busy with something. And you go down that little pathway and question yourself over and over and over again until you get to the root. And once you get to the root, you uncover kind of a revelation and aha moments and that way you can place it and put that bandaid and heal over something in your present moment and you do that with every little part in your life, every little thing that triggers you. And look, it's not easy. And a lot of times rough things can come up when you're going through shadow work and you're going through this healing process, but if you want your life to ultimately be better and more positive and happy, you have to heal these things in order to get to the other side. Okay, and just remember as you're doing this, be gentle and be loving with yourself and just understand that we all have these wounds and we all have these bruises and the more we all collectively work on these things, the happier our society is going to be. So I hope this video brought you some value. I love you guys so much. You deserve to be so happy and loving and loved and cherished and it's some deep work, but you can do it. I know you can. If you haven't already, please don't forget to like this video and subscribe if you haven't already so we can hang out again next week and I love you guys so much. Don't forget, be limitlessly yourself.