 Ladies and gentlemen Let me see here popping in back to the Q&A Try to do these Q&A's when I can Monday through Thursday Lord Willing But I do some bonus Q&A's every now and then for the members of the bless tribe as you see these new members here Katie God bless you gone a beauty God bless you. Thank y'all for joining Being a member of the bless tribe the bless tribe is really just supporters of the channel, you know, I do these Q&A's For the group, but more so than that. They really just supported me. So I really thank y'all really appreciate you After five years, is it over without a ring? Nine out of ten times it is but most people got to find out the hard way So a lot of times people stay in a relationship Five six seven years ten years To be honest with you after them first two years, you really know if it's over or not Most people know but the reason why we stay is because we don't want to be embarrassed leaving because I think our friends gonna get a laugh Our haters gonna get a laugh We feel like we fear starting all over fear having to meet somebody new and so we just stay Let me see what this question here trying to say You've mentioned not to tell a man that you're only interested in a relationship because he might Act the part the whole time some people want to know up front. Is it better to wait three months? Well, everybody want to know everything up front, you know Like when I was growing up, they say people in hell want ice water. So what that mean is Everybody want something but just because you want something don't mean that the rules to the game is gonna adjust for you So just because you want to know what a man's intentions are Does not mean that he's gonna be like, oh, was this you so Ambitious and because you want to know well, yeah, let me tell you exactly what's gonna go down here So the way this is gonna go is I'm gonna be juggling you with three other women And I'm gonna sleep with you and I'm gonna sleep with them And then when you think you got me and you fall in love, I'm gonna get another woman pregnant and then I'm gonna leave you So, yeah What do you think, you know, he's not gonna do that. He's just gonna play the game He's gonna go through the motions and If he feel you the one you're gonna feel it if he don't feel you the one You're gonna feel it and you just got to be willing to accept it Keondra God bless you. Hey, Tony. I'm 29 years old and I have no children Most men my age or older already have children, but how many kids is too many when dating a man That's a personal choice, you know If you have the spirit of a daycare director Then you know and you could be a daycare owner Then three kids might not be too many You know, if you don't have that kind of patience Then one kid might be one too many So it really comes down to you To your temperance. How do you feel about the term step mom? How do you feel about having to deal with baby mama drama if there is some How do you feel about children looking you in the face and telling you You don't make spaghetti the way my mama makes spaghetti You know, how do you feel about that? You know, so you have to Look at yourself personally and it's really on you Um brandy god bless you now. I appreciate that. Maybe you meant to put a question on there Shamiko bless you now When a man says he needs his peace, is it actually peace or He's not willing to do the work It means he needs to cheat in peace It means he need to cheat in peace mean he need to be able to go on about his business And do what he want to do without having to answer to you without having the word about you checking his phone That's what it is Truthfully it which essentially is saying he don't want you when a man wants you He doesn't want break a break away from you because you are his peace. You are his break. You are his vacation I want to be around my wife every single day. That's my vacation. That's my that's my peace Uh jacklyn god bless you now what goes through a man's head when you block him everywhere phone instagram facebook Um jacklyn depends on the man and you know him better than I know him But it's not going to be the same for every man. So Uh, if the man was a cheater and you blocking him because he cheated Or he was some other kind of bad Then he may see that as a challenge He may see that as wiggling his way to Getting you on the phone through a friend Through his mother through a mutual friend And then he may say oh you want to be big and bad I'ma get you back and i'ma dog you out the second time worse than I did you the first time So you can't just you can't block a man as like Just playing a Checkers move when you block a man It got to be a chess move and it got to be a situation to where you done You done and if you're not done Then you got to know what you getting into when he coming back You got to have some stipulations and some rules. You got to be done. Got some some some coaching Let me see I lean god bless you now god bless. I really appreciate that Really appreciate that Now make sure y'all put hashtag q in front of your question. I see this here Tony me and this guy been dating for three weeks, but then he found out I'm a virgin he said it's fine, but he hasn't been calling or texting as much anymore. Should I move on? I'm 19 he 24. Yep. Move on you two y'all to be dating Um brandy god bless you. I think you try to put a question again now, but you just send him your blessing blessing now Don't write in for no, uh, don't be calling youtube for uh charge back now brandy I'll see you in a second blessing. Um Yeah, you too young to be dating 19 years old you need to be focused on Your money you need to be focused on your degree, which is your money You need to be focused on you, you know youngest you are the men in your age range They can barely walk and chew bubblegum, you know, they really don't know right from the left. They can't tell you the difference between Uh, uh, uterus and uh Can't tell you the difference between you hit me manicure pedicure So you will be you wasting your time that young focus on you your degree and Getting things in order and when you hit about 25, that's when you really Open up your eyes for love before that a man got to be Smelling like jesus You need to thank he you need to thank he like you saw the lord glowing on him You need to see a glow around him if you pay attention to a man before the age of 25 Let's say god bless you. How do you feel about men with a 50 50 mindset? Is it a red flag? Yeah, it's a red flag. It really just mean he dating around It means dating around and he don't have The money to go 100 with all y'all So if you just pull your weight Then he got enough room to have the other women on the on the roster as well, but a man who Is serious about dating. He's serious about finding his wife He want to show you that he's a provider. He want to come in and take care of the meal He want to come in and take care of the bills if y'all get together and y'all together like become, you know, a real couple But he's not going to be paying your bills as a boyfriend But he's going to be at least paying for the dates paying for the food showing you stuff like that to let you know that he has That mentality of providing for the household Honor beauty god bless you now. What does he mean when an ex-boyfriend of five years? came back and Stated he needed closure Asked why I decided to become celibate Um, it really does not mean anything other than he has a soul tie He has a soul tie with you and he just being nosy Really just coming back to Send you a mixed signal because it's already been five years. So what that mean with five years is that mean you gave him three years too Many That mean he ought to know everything he need to know now he coming back just wasting time now You need to go on about your business been five years now. What you come back asking questions for You should already ask them questions You ought to know all you need to know five years So he's just wasting your time and what that does is it strengthens the soul tie? And it keeps you stuck because whenever somebody can run in and out your life That keep you stuck because every time he come back to get a closure conversation You start all the way over on your healing Rossi god bless you now bless you that rocks him April blessing now how to take my ex serious after nine months apart He's gonna have to make you take him serious in the sense of his actions You know, you you should not take him serious his actions should be so serious that it's undeniable His consistency should be so serious that it's undeniable. It's not that you go in and say, oh, let me just take you serious No, he need to be calling you. He need to be trying to meet up with you trying to see you He need to be an open book be transparent. He shouldn't be having a phone face down Shouldn't be having, you know, hiding passcodes Shouldn't be saying, hey, I'm gonna call you at nine and then don't call you. He need to be consistent and on point um Zanya god bless you now. I see you there With that good blessing Natasha bless you now. Hi Tony. COVID put a stop on my dating life. How to stay Positioning ready in this here new norm Thank you. Um That's good. It put a stop on your dating life that gives some time to think some time to gather your yourself, but to be honest with you, you know You could be going to the grocery store and have on you some Your sweatpants or your leggings or your jeans, whatever you like to wear you can have your mask on That man could look at you smiling. Remember, remember that you talked about um, American that time how to smile Smile with your eyes that man could see you smiling and he could see Just the way you walk That's her and he right on you. So it's not really about You know doing anything special the positioning really today is getting his knowledge Having this knowledge so that when you bump into the man when he come to holler at you You know what you're looking for. So really you need to be on Tony gasses academy dot com or on self love you Dot com Taking them courses getting that knowledge. So when you start courting with this man when he courting you You know what red flag to look out for My boyfriend they'll be blessing now. My boyfriend wants to propose And marry soon but does not want to do the required premarital counseling at my church to get married Is this a red flag? Yep. That's a red flag. That's a red flag. That's a non-negotiable That's non-negotiable. So it's like listen playboy If you don't want to go through this he'll premarital counseling. We ain't getting no marriage So go about your business If you don't want to go because see a lot of time when a man don't want to go through that It's because he don't want somebody to shine a light in your darkness Because he might see some dark spots that you he doing some things you don't know That's what's going on And that counselor might see it because they don't love them like you do so they're gonna see it And he don't want to be exposed Alice god bless you now. Thank you for all your message. I really get good insight God bless you Okay, no bondage. I'm currently Blessing now working with an attorney to establish a nonprofit for any city youth and young adults paperwork is being prepared When is a good time to apply for grant funding? Well, you can't be you can't get a grant until you set up so um, you got to get your 501c3 to get a grant now Once you incorporate you can start get private funding like I could give you a thousand dollar This person give you a thousand dollar and I would try to do private funding first from friends and family To raise some money just to do some little stuff in the community get your name out there Just a backpack giveaway Turkey day giveaway There's some little stuff get some money from the pastor from the from the lawyer from the Doctors from the dentist from the local athletes that come from your town And then get your 501c3 then you apply for your grants um Thali god bless you met a guy who's been married for five years But separated with his own place for two months Invited him to bible study and he's coming. What should I do? Uh, go to bible study system go to bible study keep your legs closed keep the bible now keep the bible That's all you got to do. You do what the bible say do don't let them come in your house And don't let them come in your body and just keep your eyes open and your ears open and Lord gonna give you that message on quantum god bless your dating since February Having sex he spent the night Didn't hear the next day post pic with child in baby mama bed ghosted me when reached out what to do You played yourself You played yourself quantum. So what you got to do now is do some coaching You got to do some coaching you played yourself like a basal and The lesson is is now understand you need to do it godway Okay, do it godway So what that means is brandy god bless you now you're gonna sit for another lesson without a question now Don't be on don't be on youtube hotline talk about It was fraud on your card now brandy God bless you high yellow any tips on dating as a single mom Really when you're a single mom make sure your child is at least five years old You need to let the weight of that child leave five years old And then when you start dating that man don't introduce that man to your child inside of one year Don't ever introduce that man inside of one year I almost missed this aileen god bless you now bless you aileen So grateful to see you today. No question. Just a preacher. Whoo That's my favorite kind of blessing now bless you Black girls rock bless you after a disagreement. He has not called to apologize. What do you think is the reason tony? It's really ego. And so that's ego and what he's doing is he's training you So when a man disagree with you y'all getting the argument and then he's going by this business He don't call you he training you because he's not showing vulnerability He's not showing any remorse. So he letting you know Don't you ever in your life again disagree with me him helper? That's what he's trying to say to you His boys now when I say help it up with my grandma used to say, you know derogatory turn Is that for the old folks? But that's what he's saying now. He might he using other words, okay? But he's he's trying to train you and he's sweating. Yeah, you know smoking. Yeah So that way you break down you get weak and then you hit him up And then he said uh gotta So if he the one supposed to be reaching out to you If he was in the wrong Then let him do that Because if you reach out to him And he was in wrong You played right into his hand and now he didn't train you Boo Baker God bless you and I thought my ex and I could be friends. He gets mad when I travel without him Doesn't want to know What's going on in my life that excludes him? Why? Well It's because he does not love you He want to control you. So what that means is You need to leave your ex your ex you can't try to You know how your ex and be preparing for your next it's like walking with your head turned backwards and so what I want you to do is Get up at your seat where you at and just walk around Where you at with your head looking backwards And see what you finna do You finna stomp that toe toe gonna be bleed you finna bump that knee you finna run into a wall You finna trip and fall. That's what's had Dylan. That's what's happening essentially in your life When you dealing with an ex You just tripping yourself up. You got to go ahead about your business Uh, Rachel garb dashing now my boyfriend and I just got back together He told me he is still angry at me. So he is going to punish me and I have to accept whatever treatment he gives me Am I being manipulated? Rachel Rachel i'm gonna tell you like this right here If you talk to that man another time You slap crazy You talk to that man one more time You look like who shot John and forgot to kill him Broke busted and disgusted tow up from the floor You hear me? That man right there a man tell you that Got to go got to go Never again a man tell you that never that got to be the last time He ever See you sniff you Hear your voice see your face If he have a dream about you, he need to wake up apologize to the lord Listen listen to me That man tell you that right there You got the gold because that's what he come back to do. He coming back to break you. He coming back to annihilate you He coming back to incapacitate you. He coming back to lead you useless brews broken And woe out so that no other man, whatever need you or won't you listen a man tell you that right now Got to go Love like god bless your tone and what are the core needs of a man besides the need to feel needed? Respect the intimacy. That's all you know already. You know already hit it right there. That's everything You know everything you need to know about a man Design your junior god bless you now. You know everything you need to know about a man You need to be you need to take the life coach certification course on tonigasinsacademy.com Wireless 30% off and join my mentor dot life and start coaching. You know everything you need to know She's a queen god bless you. I have a hard time building an emotional connection with men that I like Any tips on how to be vulnerable in a healthy way? No, look at the definition of vulnerable Look at the definition for vulnerable so Vulnerable men to be open for attack So when you dealing with a man that's not your husband You never want to be vulnerable because see the definition of vulnerable change when you marry and you're in love but when you In the dating world All is found love and war to be vulnerable means to be open for attack So you never want to be vulnerable for a man the reason why You have a hard time connecting Emotionally with men that you like is because that's what you want, but that's not what you need That's what you like, but that's not your husband. That's your preferences, but that's not your standards So see the man that's for you. He got a key to your heart So you don't have to Open the lock. He got the key the man. That's for you. You're gonna feel relaxed You're gonna feel open the conversation gonna flow. You're gonna feel at peace. You're gonna be cool calm and collected It's gonna feel like You're gonna feel everything going right. So that's what you got to understand when you don't feel that that's your intuition that's telling you Gone about your business. This ain't your husband Shay Shay god bless you now watched if you take him back and forgiveness was the thing But how do you forgive yourself for making the mistake of taking him back? Well, you forgive yourself by leaving him So once you leave him and once you start to get the knowledge Then that is the action of forgiving yourself. See you haven't forgiven yourself if you stay with him But if you take him back and he acting a fool Then you got to leave him Zanya junior god bless you now. Lovely light god bless you So that's what it's all about action It really it ain't no magic potion that you stern in the big steel black pot You know, it ain't nothing about it ain't none of that Okay, it's just about your action. What you gonna do you finna get up and leave Good see you lie new day to see Now when y'all put those in there in the chat, sometimes I miss those so y'all got to forgive me on those. Okay I try to catch all of these but Y'all tearing that five dollars up And they they and they be deleting old fast. So y'all forgive me now. I'm trying to make sure Separate it with his own place Yeah, um, thali the one you taking the man the bible study take it real slow with him now Please the blood of jesus over and not in person but in your head And make sure he's living by that bible. What is your opinion on mother staying in unhealthy relationship for the sake of the kids? Well, think about that, you know, you know, just think about that because It really ain't for the sake of the kids It is really for the sake of her insecurity For the for the sake of her lack of self-love because if it's really about the kids Then you don't want your kids in an unhealthy environment So if it's really about the kid, you're gonna get up and be gone because you could do bad by yourself And you could do better by yourself So it really ain't by the kid because the kids seeing toxicity and unhealthy relationship and seeing mama broke down Seeing mama crying seeing mama stress seeing mama a shell of herself. That ain't benefiting them kids That teaching them how to hate yourself That's teaching them how to have a toxic relationship So that's hurting the kids not benefiting the kids. So a lot of time People say that but we putting it on the kids because we too weak to leave because we don't want to We fear the unknown we fear starting over and we think that that's going to damage the children But you got to realize god made children different That's why the bible tell you if you had a the faith of a child see childlike faith Childlike courage childlike love childlike like when you look at the childlike mentality They're so ambitious and courageous and brave and resilient Because they haven't been here long enough for the world to strip them of who they truly are So It's harder actually on Adults to break up than it is on the kids now. Yeah, the kids may go through some things But it's harder on the adult But see if the child got a parent that they living with and that parent is 100 Then that child going to be healthy. That child going to be all right Are you thinking of writing another book soon? Absolutely. Jacqueline. Um, I'm ghost writing right now I'm finishing up ghost writing a book. But when I finished that then I could focus back on my own You know situation, but I'm gonna be writing books the rest of my life. Lord willow Went out on a date yesterday With a guy and our dogs learned that he isn't a born-again believer He wants a second date. How do I gently turn him down and tell him it is because of a difference in beliefs Well, you got to realize now. There ain't really nothing gentle All you could do is say it without screaming and yelling without cursing And say hey, it was great spending time with you. But unfortunately I'm just not in a place to move forward And I just it's nothing against you You don't even have to give him the whole reason. It's me not you Because see we live in a new day and age today and a lot of people being turned over to a reprobate mind So you tell somebody you got to be careful the reasons you give people because you never know what people hear that Could be Ted Bundy nephew that you're talking to But when you put it on you not him Like you going through too much like you not in the right place like you could possibly possibly potentially Break his heart then it's like wow, okay. Thank you for looking out for me. Thank you for not wasting my time Whereas when you tell him you're not good enough That's what he's going to hear when you say it's because of difference in religious beliefs It's gonna say you're not good enough You ignorant you done You you lost you unlearned. That's what he's going to hear So then if he cuckoo for cocoa puffs now You can have a problem on your hand. So it's all about really you worthy and you need to lie to him It's you not him. It's it's your decision. It's where you at Camille God bless you now boyfriend and I are in the power struggle stage. How do we overcome? Well, it's gonna take Remember what I tell you now what my cousin taught me when we were 10 or 11 he said relationship is 51 49 So y'all power struggle because y'all 50 50 you just bumping heads So what you're gonna have to do is you don't have to be 51 49 the day me and my wife were talking about, uh Situation today and I had one opinion on it. She had another opinion on it. She said, all right. All right Well, hey, just do what you think is best. It's ain't no sense of us going back and forth on this hill Jesse, that's what you feel. Let's do that And so she sidestep She sidestep the power struggle because she said, okay All right I'ma give you this one go ahead Now I end up doing What she said we ought to do So then I took a sidestep so she sidestep then I took a sidestep because after I thought about it I really was just voicing and thinking out loud and she was telling me her opinion But what I realized her opinion made more sense Carolyn God bless you now um Mommy V bless you is per a good reason to end the marriage She's talking about nasty movies now. Um, yes, it is Yes, it is it that that is You know, especially if it's an addiction Like if he just was you know venturing out there watching it one time Then that's something different you check them on that y'all talk about that y'all work through that But if that's what he does um You know, that's unfaithfulness. That's unfaithfulness. It's gonna lead to some lot to a lot of problems Boo Baker God bless you now my ex was Abusing and abandon Abuse and abandon as a child Talks at first marriage. He's broken. So I stayed his friend in good faith knowing he has issues with abandonment I know he loves me when I call he runs advice Well He don't love you Um boo Baker, your your ex does not love you and what he went through as a child that You know 60 70 percent of people going through that these days. So there's not really an excuse for an adult to still be Where he's at and what he's doing because his his mentors out there as coaches out there as books out there counselors therapists so You coddling him you babying him is not helping him And when you call he run that's because he don't want you that because he's tired of you See what you got to realize somebody that got that type of trauma and that type of pain If they really want to be better, they want you in their life. They're not running from you They're not running from you. They come into you. So understanding that right there So he running just because he know that you're not the one for him and he's not the one for you And he really because he kind of your friend. He's really trying to spare your heart So anybody him loving you he may respect you He may have some love for you, but it's nothing romantic, you know So understand that now Oh, he run to you you say when you call him you say he runs Well, guess what if his actions don't back it up with love If you if y'all not together and like you say your ex that's not love then that's a soul tie That's a soul tie. So you got to understand the difference I got a course on a course on soul ties on tonigasinscademy.com You got to understand the difference between a soul tie and love Because he love is pure Love is not mixed signals. Love is not in and out your life. Love is not backing for Love is not confusing. Love is pure Love is pristine. It's crystal clear clarity confidence wholeness peace happiness anything. That's not that It's a deviation from love. It's not love. We call it love what you got to realize you could have a relationship without love You could have a little love without a relationship But love is pure so you got to understand that the actions always going to back up if it's real love It's going to be pure Z God bless you. This one guy only texts me and not call I don't call him either. We go on dates and everything, but I think he stays with a woman and everybody's you right He stayed with a woman You already that's your woman intuition letting you know that So now that your woman's intuition lets you know that Go on about your business how to tell a man Tiffany God bless you now how to tell a man he has some growing up to do Without offending him by the way, thank you for saving my dating life. You are a blessing. Hey God bless you now Um, you go offend them, but you don't necessarily have to tell a man that he has some growing to do It's really like more so you stopping the behaviors you don't like meaning If a man don't call you when he says we're gonna call you that next conversation you say listen I don't have time to waste so if you're not going to be able to keep your word and please don't waste my time And however, he take that that's how he take that that's on him. You're not yelling at him You're not cursing at him. You just keeping it real. So it's really you don't say hey, you need to grow up You just call out the behaviors that you don't want to see repeat it See any behavior that is recognized and rewarded repeats itself But when you stop that behavior you call it out you redirect that behavior Then you reinforce the positive behavior Now that's how he learns and he grows and he changes But if you're not doing that then you're going to be wasting your time Esmeralda. God bless you now x is 45 I'm 28. I left because he was a ill But I wanted him to change I didn't want to be done. I was holding on to the whole family picture now. He's moved on to a woman Another woman and I am struggling with that five years. Well, you're going to have to do the work to heal You're going to struggle now because five years So it's it's normal and natural struggle. But what you got to realize that you were dating your daddy You were dating your daddy and so you might have some daddy wounds that you might need to address with your counselor But a man that's that old That man old enough he bought old enough to be your granddaddy That man old enough depending on the decade that the era he you know, we in So what you got to realize going about your business? You either do your coaching read your books take your courses be on your life going about your business Let's say god bless your eight months in he feels I should treat him I believe in a man courting everything is fine until money is involved He calls me selfish for not spending on him as I do myself and family Is that a legitimate reason to let him go? Yes a legitimate reason to let him go Because it's only eight months and he focused on the wrong thing. It's like come on, bro A real man ain't trying to come in and get took care A real man ain't talking about oh, why you don't buy me stuff like you'd be doing for you and your family That ain't what no real man that that's old That's a grown boy So eight months in you already dealing with money issues for this man want to be treated Like what is you? He like he old thought It's like come on, bro You're supposed to be trying to court pay for dates Optimum he want to be treated. Why you don't do for him like you do for yourself and your family Eight months be last month. I got to go got to go Hey, go on about your business now. Let's turn Cherise God bless you now. I've been on several dates with a new guy and when we meet I see him blushing But he never compliments me. What's going on in his head? Well, Cherise now What you got to understand now That blushing might be his spirit Being disrupted because he know he come to play games So you got to understand now sometimes the fruit looks similar, but the root is different Now he's not complimenting you but that don't mean nothing right away. Okay, because players compliment Dolls compliment. Okay Dolls literal dolls and men. That's dolls compliment So what you got to understand that don't really mean nothing so you got to look beyond that and and You know, don't worry about a compliment. Where about his actions? Where about his consistency focus on that down Sarah E. God bless you when a man's in love Well, he still think you're beautiful even if he catches you looking rough. Yes. Yes When when a man in love everything beautiful Everything is beautiful every day. You're beautiful like my wife. She could have Happy messy no makeup on Just woke up and I'm like girl you look sassy And she'd be like get out of here. I'm looking so rough. What are you talking about? But it's just like when you fall in love It's like a a gloss come over the person To wear like all the looks look the same Dressed up dressed down it all looked the same because you're just looking through a lens of love So everything looked cute your breakout looked cute your nail that the grownout looked cute Your lashes that don't fell off and now you got them three three long lashes that's sticking out the rest of them fell off That look cute, you know, everything looked cute when you fall in love Jerica God bless you now. God met through friends started sending DM Two months ago on current events asked last week if I'm in a relationship He said he wasn't in one and is looking but didn't ask me out time was through Um No, he might just be moving slow because you a warm lead He met you through friends. So Just take some time time or tell Sunshine and like God bless you from the male perspective How can a wife keep her husband wanting more of her since naturally as people We take the people we see often for granted and men especially always seem to be on the hunt To be honest with you is nothing you can do as a woman Other than be your best self meaning you're not trying to argue You ain't backing down when you getting disrespected now. You ain't letting no disrespect fly You ain't letting no cheating fly. You ain't doing no threesome You're not going against your morals and your values, but you just your best self You taking care of your body you taking care of your mind You bring you bringing the peace you bringing the energy You just your best self because it's nothing you can do to be honest with you It's women flipping and tossing sliding down a pole cooking three meals a day She got the skillet next to the bed flipping burgers while she on top the man Yes, and he's still cheating on them. It's really nothing you can do What the number one thing you got to do as a woman is make sure you choose a man that has character Because ain't nothing gonna keep a man faithful other than himself Meaning his relationship with God his belief system His purpose who he is it is nothing a woman could do you could cook all day You could clean all day you can suck and duck and jive and fly you can swain Bop top rock anything you want to do and you still get cheated on if you choose a man Who does not have high morals high character high values and a man of integrity So it's it's less about you and more about the man you choose Shanice God bless you not just sending a blessing She will God bless you now been in a long distance relationship for one year five months He's in DC and I'm in Alabama We talked for nine months Before meeting and since then have met and spent time together And he wants to meet my parents and daughter. Could this be real? Yeah, yeah, it could be real nine. It could also be fake So you know Yeah, it could be real But it could be fake You mean so with a situation like that you got too many caveats and nuances in there So you're going to need a one-on-one coaching session because you're going to have to dig a little deeper It's going to be a lot of a lot of little telltale signs in there that we can't get into on here It's going to come down to the frequency of his calls The type of calls do we send handwritten letters? Do we send 1 800 flowers once a month? DC to Alabama they ain't too far apart sound like y'all haven't seen each other You know a couple of times It's been a year and five months Y'all don't sound too too close. So there's a lot that go into that right there now Jaminique God bless you one and a half year relationship We're sending and talk of marriage God confirmed that he's my husband But he says there's a reason why he has postponed his proposal But it's asking me to invest in his business, etc Jaminique I'm trying to find the words for you Jaminique Um, let me help you understand this Jaminique God is not a man that he should lie So based on what I'm telling you is God ain't told you that lie That's the devil and told you that Because when you're on your back in sin God not talking to you You can't hear nothing the Lord saying Because your legs open So the devil talking to you Okay, God is not talking to you what the God saying has come up out of bed Okay, and uh The man supposed to be bringing to your life In some places in the world a man got to pay a dowry meaning he got to pay money He got to get a cattle. He got to pay money to get that woman hand in marriage This man got you on your back Been a year and a half and now he asking you to sew into his life And he hasn't even given you A lifelong commitment listen to him sister That man playing you like monopoly He playing you like a deck of cards like you park of brothers You hit me You got for one don't open your wallet at all Don't open your wallet close your wallet Close your legs Open your bible Open your eyes Open your ears Get on my mentor that life Book you by four sessions and then by that you're gonna have The strength the leaders man Because it's no real man gonna have you on your back Not give you his hand in marriage and ask you for to invest in his hair brain business A real man is not gonna do that Here go to his home boys his mama To the bank for a loan To the credit repair lady to get a credit fix so he could get a credit card get along A real man will do all of that before he asks a girlfriend That he have in sin To invest in his business Did the man got a degree? Do you have any success in business? Do we have a business mentor? It's like come on now So come on now and listen to everybody on hill Everybody on hill listen to me Stop Lying on god Okay, stop putting words in god mouth Y'all please stop doing that because the lord do not like that Lord do not the lord is the lord of the light Hey, uh, Gabriel bring some water Hold on a Tenor soprano y'all hold it down real quick over there. I know y'all saying 24 hours, but hold on right Well, I'm watching Tony Gaskin live and a young lady just said That I told her the man is her husband Whoo And she is saying they down there fornicating. She said I told her You hear me y'all gotta understand Y'all start lying on the lord. Okay, stop lying on the lord. Come out of the sin All right Then talk to the lord And that's where you're gonna hear the message because this is where the lord talking that right here through me to tell you come out that sin And start lying on my name And leave that sorry man Who asking you for a business loan? That's what Bank of America for Playboy, go get you a loan from the bank You hear me Don't ever give a man money ever Ever Unless y'all married and he'd have been faithful for the long haul then you invest in them That's more of a God bless you now. I have a three-year-old son by my 45-year-old ex I'm 28. Okay. This is the same one wrote any advice for my son being around this woman that I know nothing about Well You got to know the man you got to know your 45-year-old ex your ex daddy Because 45 yo, I remember your question 45 28 Since God bless you since you're gonna need coaching all right You're gonna need coaching on that one right there says that man a little too old that man older than me that man 12 You're older than me that man been playing games so long. Yeah me that man got more game than all of us So listen, you're gonna need coaching on that one right there sister And when you know that man, you know when you know the man Jared God bless you now when you know the man Then you'll know the woman if the man no good and sorry then the woman gonna be no good and sorry So if the man no good and sorry, then the woman gonna be doing your child like this That's I don't like your mom That's how the woman gonna be doing your child. So you got to know the man Because a good man ain't gonna bring no sorry woman around his child, but a no good man That's gonna tell you everything you need to know and your number one priority is take care of your child Quantum God bless you turn the 24 mom and granny don't want me to leave, but I'm ready to move Go on about your business move Go on move. Yeah, they don't want you to leave. But if you ready to go on grow go on grow Tammy God bless you mr. Tony. I had never heard of you until one month ago. You've been God sent nothing but the truth Hey, God bless you now. I don't know why you will hear of me. Tammy. I ain't hear of you till the night. So You know, we learned each other ain't nobody you shouldn't heard of me. You know, I'm a man on the on the internet You hear me? But a good I'm glad that we want in each other that we met each other. Thank you for being here. Thank you for that blessing that you sent me Jackie God bless you now left for five year engagement with a 37 year old immature emotionally and verbally Grown boy, will he ever grow up or will he go from woman to woman repeating the cycle of of you? Um It sounds like he's gonna be in that cycle says So what you got to do is you got to Appreciate the fact that you have been spared Do not regret it. Don't miss them a single day go on about your business And just keep loving yourself keep moving with your life. But it sounds like he's gonna be in that in that cycle Lord God bless you Tony can God send a woman into a man's life to teach him something for a lesson Not a pure relationship Toxic Well, what you got to realize is that Um God ain't sending you know, well Okay Because god is not the author of confusion So the more the more you read your bible you get to see the characteristics and the attributes of god And the bible tell you that god is not the author of confusion The bible tell you that god attempts no man. So that means he attempts no human So what that means is that in the bible tell you that god gives gifts and adds no sorrow So god ain't gonna send you into a war zone of a man's life where you could lose your life where you could be You know taking advantage of where you could be heard and all of this That didn't you just went there. Okay, you went there life took you there And so if you feel like you need it you taught him a lesson and you got spared You're not too hurt then go on about your business. See what god to give you Is the way of escape When the adversary has put you in a test or Temptation what god to give you is the way of escape What god to give you is the wisdom to see that he's not in it and that you need to get gone That's what god will do. Okay Shayla god bless you now tonic I've been wanting to start my own channel by asking god for confidence. Do you believe in fasting? Yeah, I believe in fasting, but I don't know if it's gonna give you confidence, you know Reading your bible and praying You know give you confidence Proverbs 7 1 say the knowledge of the lord brings about a strong confidence. You read your bible every day That'll start to boost your confidence, you know You know fasting could just end up making you hungry And so you have to be very intentional with that be very mindful of what you're doing and And and I will you know, you got to just get out there. You got to get out there I'm not confident. You know, I don't want to be on here tonight I I didn't want to get on here tonight. I'm shy, you know, I'm I'm an introvert. I'm very quiet I don't talk to nobody, but I just got to go, you know, I just got to go I just got to do so if god and call you to or you just got to be old being you can't think about it Every video I do like when I finish the video, I'd never watch the video again Every video I shoot I never watch it again. I don't watch it. I don't edit it That's why I don't even edit my video because I'll be watching and critiquing myself And the video I'll never make it to the daylight. So I let it go out And it just don't the only time I get took down if it maybe get flagged or something like that You know, or it get to it to rile people up too much and people don't understand the Lord say, okay Came in too hot, you know, you you you over the head with that one So brain that went on back say that to you 38 say that to you 40 that they ain't ready for that topic But other than that, I'm just going just going you just got to act on it It ain't no magical potion. Remember that ain't gonna be no mantra. You just got to go Miss till God bless you now. I'm married, but I know my husband is with someone and we are separated But he is constantly saying I have someone I have someone what is that about? Well, that's just his guilty conscience talking and um y'all done And it's just his guilty conscience talking and He trying to you know, get you to say some or lead on some so he can make himself feel better About what he's doing. So you just got to understand that if you ain't got nobody then Instead of telling him you ain't got nobody to say well Whether I do or don't that's not your business. Thank you by Crystal God bless you I think it's hopeless out here to find love think I should just change my vision for life And let finding love take a backseat. What coaching class would be good for me to start with? um I don't have a class on mindset yet I don't have a class on mindset or positive self-talk And that's probably that sound like that's what you need um, because life gonna give you What you tell life to give you That's what life gonna do for you Because when God said let there be light and there was light When we read that example The reason why that example exists for us Is to say that what you speak is what's gonna come about So when you said that you almost choked on my spit reading it because I don't even like reading negative negativity I don't need like letting negativity come out my mouth So you first got to change your mindset and you got to change what you're saying because when you say that Your brain does not know the difference between Fact or fiction. So whatever you tell your brain it accepts it as the truth So when you say that you can't say that with a smile You can't say that elated you can't say that with joy when you say that your countenance Changes you get down You get a little depressed your brain release A toxic chemical into your stomach your stomach start to hurt you start to feel a little depressed All because you spoke those negative words and your brain heard it and it believes it But when you change that and when you say I know love is out there Because I see what tonic gas and I see a real life example He pulled down the country and he found love. I know I could find love I I know God like he know God. I know it's love out there. I know I'm gonna meet my husband. Whoo. I can meet my husband today. That's how you got to think about it And I I check my email all the time. I tell my wife Why you taking email time because I say a blessing coming a blessing coming I'm waiting on this blessing to come every single day I'm waiting on this blessing to come and I don't lose enthusiasm from one day to the next I'm waiting on this blessing to come and sometimes waiting on that blessing to come I'll be like lord. Hey need a blessing one of y'all to send me a cash out. Whoo. Thank you lord. Look at Lord Say I hear you. I heard you somebody signed up to be a life coach. I said, okay We've got another little coach coming into the world. That's because that blessing me too So you see you just got to change your mindset And and but with that mindset right there, just take all my courses. Just take all my courses And now when I'm gonna hurt you take all of them. Okay self love you dot com Self dad's love dad's love of you dot com ain't now of course gonna hurt you Um Zanya join your God bless you. What do I do with men that say they cannot be with me because I don't need anything from a man I am 50. Am I just supposed to not have nothing at all? Those are just the wrong men for you That's all you got to realize It's really a man that's not built for you That's not for you that does not want to be with you that's using that as his excuse to say Ah, we meant to be it's nothing against you though. It's just That's not your man. So you got to understand that and keep going Um, but Tina God bless you God bless you Now I'm gonna tell y'all what now I missed some of y'all that was in here with the blessings that come up in the chat Like tally. I see it's 25 and 35 too big of an age gap Technically, yes, but stranger things have happened. You typically want to stay within five years Because what you got to realize within five years you within the same generation so to speak. I mean You within the same decade So your music kind of was the same the world Happenings was the same Or the technology was the same when you were in that five years when you go to 10 now It could be a big difference between an 80 babies and a 90s baby. You said, I mean versus a 81 and a 86 You know 80 versus 90 that could be a huge difference Teaching the cold god blessing. I see you right down So she's royal bless you now During a combo about the way forward Boyfriend of nine months asked me To score him. I asked him the same about me He says 60 40 We live together. Am I wrong to be offended? Well, I don't know what 60 40 is You know, I really don't know What that 60 40, I don't know what kind of school y'all talking about You know, but no, you're not wrong to be offended. I mean, I know 60 is an elf And 40 is an elf too. So I don't know if he's trying to play off the 80 20 But yeah, I'm gonna look a few about that now and y'all and now hold on. We live together Okay, that's where you that's where you're going wrong at right now Because you living with a man you've been with for nine months That's not your husband. So this what y'all got to understand about this moving in together like If a man don't love you And he smelled your gas That's gonna make them hate you If a man don't love you And you snore that's gonna make them hate you If you accidentally forget to wrap that monthly up good And dispose of it in the garbage can and you it floating in the toilet Or leave a little red rain around the toilet because you flushed it or you use full ply or tissue you use scotch tissue to wrap it up So the red doesn't soak through if a man don't love you that's gonna make them hate you But see that's where you go wrong when you move in together See when when you build love and you date and you get engaged and you get married Now you love each other So when you move in together your burp you you passing gas your monthly It's cute to him But see when you move in with a man don't fall in love inside of two years So when you live with a man in nine months, he despises you Everything you do he think nasty you getting under his skin Like a termite in the walls. You hear what i'm telling you? So that's why he told you 60 40 because you let him get too close before y'all even built real love See saws god bless you now. My boyfriend is so focused on money He's trying to dissuade me from going to law school because of the economy Always focus on money and he economics I feel like he's being a naysayer. He's amazing in every other way You're gonna have to do what you want to do. Okay That's your boyfriend boyfriend don't get no say so in your life because if he wake up in two years and want to leave you Now you ain't getting no alimony because that's boyfriend. So law school go and get your law degree Lord willing you get through it. Lord willing you pass the bar Then you can get your job as a law you make it a little money Some lawyers don't make no money. Some lawyers making 45,000. Oh, and so law school ain't got nothing to do with no economy You can have students on regardless of what you do. You can have debt regardless of what you do So you better off going pursuing your dream the reason why let me tell you why why this man here Telling you not to go to law school Because you you his equal right now When you go to law school you elevate above him You become somebody they see a lot of men want to keep a woman barefoot and pregnant A lot of men want to feel like a woman places just in the house A lot a lot of men just want a woman to be cooking and cleaning But see when you go to law school, he feel like you're gonna be in law class And it's gonna be this old tall dark and handsome glass of chocolate milk sitting in there And then when y'all got to break in the groups you get put in the group with Suave Suve who talking all this civil law And he feel like you could get swept off your foot because you got to be with your study group four five six hours Studying for the big test in this old tall glass of water in a Sahara desert in your group See if you go to law school, he feel like you're gonna outgrow him That you're gonna be better than him that you're gonna be looking down on him because ain't no man in his right mind It's prestigious as just saying I'm a lawyer is ain't no man in his right mind Gonna tell his woman not to go to law school Unless he jealous and insecure Now that's what you got to realize and that's what you ain't want to heal But see that's why I be trying to tell y'all everything says something But we don't want to hear what it's saying because we want to believe what we want to believe because of what we want So because you won't love so bad because you want a man so bad Because you want a relationship so bad You don't want to believe that the man you dealing with could be jealous of you trying to sabotage your success Because he's afraid you're gonna outgrow him. Tell him I said it Shout this part of the video with him playboy get your life together You got an ambitious good woman trying to better herself and grow and you trying to hold her down Man money come and go they're giving out stimuli checks right now Money come and go man let that one pursue what she want to pursue and you pursue what you need to pursue So y'all could build together and be a power couple still trying to hold that woman back Hey, come on now all got to do better Asia one on one god bless you not tony Should I tell a friend for over 10 years that I have strong feelings for him? Or call it a loss. We talk about everything we dated briefly in the past. I broke up with him foolishly He is now married Now you see the way married came out. It just something happened when I seen that word married It just hit it hit it just came out differently You ain't even having at all caps. So friend 10 years Dated in the past broke up with him He married Okay, so what you need to do is cut him all the way off and let that woman have her husband What you need to do is cut him all the way off And let that woman have her husband and you heal your heart so you can attract your husband Because while you trying to be the third leg You're going to end up getting chopped off Because one day she might get in her feelings and when she got her clout in that situation They're getting ready to buy a new house. They're getting ready to start a big business And she see you in the way. Oh, you want to do this? Well, first I don't feel comfortable. You're gonna have to cut off your little friend guess what He's gonna drop you like a bad habit You're gonna be falling like rain from the sky and there's gonna be nothing to catch you So before that happened you need to gather yourself and say, you know what? I'm gonna remove myself because we done had a history and I got feelings and you may have feelings I don't know if you got feelings, but I'm gonna remove myself because this is not healthy for me They're blocking my blessing from meeting the man. That's for me. You don't found the woman That's for you. Now. I need to get the man for me. That's what you need to be saying to yourself You got to go on about your business system um kb god blessing nine nine cf a 2,500 nine Not so not so wish you was over here with that 2,500 nine, but a thank you god Bless you all are saying that mean a lot so long from from africa Tony I am 37 my child is two and a half How can I wait? three more years I would like other kids never been married and not with the dad well, you've got to wait three more years because the child need to be able to talk for the self because With the way the world is now You bring a man in your life I'm trying to tell you that man gonna be thumping your child in the head That man gonna be letting your child roll off the changing table You you go on to work and thinking this man's safe around your child Your child gonna be doing Summer salts off that tape off that changing table And then uh six months later your child that's gonna be spitting just at the dinner table spitting and you're gonna be like Why is my child spitting at the dinner table? It's because your child and hit they hit So many times rolling off that changing table From your boyfriend because your boyfriend don't love your child So you got to love your child and you got to protect your child. So guess what? You make your bed. You got to lay in it. You got on your bike before you was married You had a child. That's the consequences of getting on your back When you're not married So now you got to stay single so you could be 100 percent parental for your child to protect your child from this world Because you watch a little bit of news you're gonna see what boyfriends doing to girlfriends children to step children. Okay, listen You can't trust nobody you barely could trust yourself with your child You get pushed to the limit yourself with your child You can't trust no stranger that don't know your child don't care about your child. You hear me? So just focus on being single and let y'all tell it y'all been telling me in the comments Uh on my video about 50 and up Every every day I get a new comment Oh Oh Women could have women have children in their 50s every day Hey You talking like women who are 50 or just I am so sick of this women having children. I'm like, whoa, okay. Women can have children in their 50s. All right Congratulations Sarah and Abraham. I ain't know y'all still having children in 50s a woman told me today women having Babies in their 50s every day. I said, oh really that's news to me So hey if that and somebody said especially in Africa So, you know, it's probably better There's better water over there. I went I went to Africa. They told me it's the third best water in the world And I say, okay. Wow. It's better water over there. Maybe it's less processed food So if you over there you in the motherland 37 That's 17 over there in the motherland It's so pure and pristine over there. So you probably can't that was Sarah was in Africa when she had the baby at 95 So you probably can't have a baby at 40 45 50. So listen You'd have made one mistake by sleeping with a man at one your husband So now make it right by being 100 percent mommy for your child who needs you to protect that child From these men that you might be dating out here Do that right there right and you're going to get what you want out of life Thank for queen god blessing my ex dawg dawg me out, which I left him in december But he pulls me towards my dreams, which now i'm an owner of my business right now thoughts a Every loss ain't a loss. Okay. That's how you got to look at it every loss ain't a loss You lost them, but you gained something. It was a lesson. So a double for your trouble That don't mean you need to go back to him. Just be thankful for what he did do But he ain't do enough. So keep keep moving about your business Salim god bless you not bless for that blessing. Thank you so much tony for your insight You are truly a blessing to so many people quick question If your boyfriend says he needs space should you take him back if he comes and overall he has great qualities No Me personally just i'm just tell you as a man a man don't ask his wife for space A man asks a roster filler for space You said i mean, you know the roster filler like when you if you watch any sports The person that's the people on the bench that don't get to play much. That's the roster filler That's who you ask for a break You you you on this team you're not asking lebron for a break You said you ain't asking step curry damian lilet for no break So a man don't ask his wife for a break. He asks a roster filler for a break So if he want to take a break, let him keep on breaking Let him just keep a break fast keep going right on about your business Playboy ain't got the time for you because if you're standing still a man will run in and out your life Cindy Harris god bless you nice and god bless you now. I see that red up there. God bless you That's a mighty blessing now Hey, tony had no idea you were live tonight. Just sent a message to connect with you for coaching How long before a session married almost 30 years now a widow almost three years trying to date grown boys not My time I'm a salon owner slash stylist ready to focus on my three bees reinvent time. Please help um I believe the sessions now booked into july. I think they're booking into july But you can visit my mentor dot life and click on browse coaches Um, if you need it sooner than that then we have vip sessions, but You have to email in to support at tonigaction.com I typically coach about three vip's a week who you know, can't wait the four to six weeks, but Your situation is not that pressing So, you know, I would just say booking on my mentor dot life. It may you may find something in June No, not June. No, not June. You'll find something in july But um, your situation not not that, you know pressing so so you got a little time Uh crystal god bless you. Thank you for your answer. May god continue to bless you and your family Love the video with you and your wife Getting the book this weekend. Can't wait to read it. Purchase t-shirt a couple weeks ago. Hey crystal god bless you now You showing up you showing up my ex is a in Arguing calling me name, but my son loves him and I want them to have a relationship should I allow this? Or stay away. Well, if he good to your son Then you just let him be there for your son and you could get a mediator So tell him when you want to see your son call my mama or call my sister call my best friend You get somebody to stand in the gap and be the mediator to do the drop-offs and pickups And when you see that he might fall off and if he fall off Then your son get to see the real truth that he was using him as a pawn And that's that's gonna hurt But you can't allow yourself to be dolled out and mistreated if it's gonna break you down Now if he could talk to you whatever kind of way and you let it roll off your back And just let him deal with your son But if it's breaking you down to where you crying and you you know, you have you a shell of yourself for your son Now that's when you got to come up with a different plan And um on my mentor.life We got co-parents and coaches that can help you with that. I've never had a co-parent So my wisdom only gonna go so far on them situation Crown Virgo god bless you a friend and I Reconnected after his wife just passed. I'm 51 and he's 58 Are we good now for dating leading to a relationship? Now see the key word what you said is just passed So No, y'all not good what you will be right now is a band aid See he got an open wound and you will be the band aid So what you got to realize is that could set you up for failure y'all also seven years apart So you outside of that five year grace. So that's another red flag. So just pass friend from your pass And y'all seven years apart He got an open wound. So you a band aid or a rebound So if you want to do that charity work, you know, then start a foundation and be You know widow with or were lovers Incorporated and you get a bunch of women that y'all talk on the phone with men who just lost their wife So if you want to do that charity work start a foundation If you don't want to do charity work, then you need to go and let him heal Let him talk to the pastor. Let him talk to the grief counselor Let him get some healing and say listen, I don't want to be a rebound I don't want to be a band aid. I don't want to be a test dummy. I don't want to be a hold me down So I think you need to heal and I'm not in a place to be talking to you every day without getting feelings And I don't believe that you could just get feelings that fast And so I need to protect myself and then you ain't got to say all of that to him But you got the you know Think of that D. D. God bless you. Do you think men these days are truly looking and wanting a wife? Beyond which I think about every man want a wife A lot of men don't know what a wife looked like and a lot of women don't know what a wife looked like So that's really where the problem comes in at A lot of people just don't know what they're looking for. So imagine being on a scavenger hunt And you don't know what treasure you out there looking for you just to walk around picking up leaves And so that's really more so the case is If you learn what a wife looked like and and you are a wife as a woman when I'm when you meet the man That's for you. He's gonna know you his wife Point blank period Ruben L. God bless you as always. Thank you for your message and videos of truth and hope God bless protect you and your family In Jesus name. Hey God bless you now. Hey y'all my battery just had 20% now. So I'm gonna see what we got on here Rock saying God bless you How do I begin to heal after being lied to by a man I thought was in a relation I thought I was in a relationship with only to find out The woman he lives with is not his sister um Well rock saying um You're just gonna have to take that one on the chin Okay, and a boxing match when you get hit in the chin you get knocked out So yes, you didn't got knocked out All right, then you get an eight count They count the eight to make sure you got to be on your feet Then they make sure you're okay And for you going about your life So you just got to take that lesson you took a L The next time you meet a man who living with a woman that say his sister Then you're gonna know let me get on over here and talk to your sister Oh, I need to meet your sister if that's your sister then I need to meet your sister So just add that lesson to your you know repertoire to your arsenal of lessons And keep doing what you're doing one foot in front of the other See love God bless you now. See love be blessing me now. Tonya Jordan. God bless you so much wisdom gained through each video Live or not. Thank you. Hey bless you Tonya. I really appreciate that Now let me see. I know I missed some of y'all in here um in in the other kind of Chat scene pray love bless you. I'll see you right there Evet God bless you now Make sure on your question you have that hashtag cue On there So I can see that I left my ex start getting on my back with him He wants to get back with me Been putting in work now talking about marriage I said must get premarital counseling. He agreed. Am I doing what's right, Tony? Well, I'ma tell you this now You left your ex You stopped sleeping with him Now i'ma tell you now you got to be very careful. You got to tread lightly You can't go to one premarital counseling session and think that y'all heal Think that y'all done Because what happens on this hill situation is Men hate to lose So a lot of times a man will come back and you could say a jump through that fiery hoop over there Hey, i'ma take this ring of fire. I know I need you to jump through that fire time Because show me you got a brave heart show me that you really want to be with me He'll jump through that fire time. All right, we finna go skydiving. I need to see that you really really love me He'll go skydiving. He'll get you back Rock you to sleep A year in be cheating on you All because he wanted the last laugh. He wanted the last lick And he didn't want to lose he wanted to be able to walk away on his terms He didn't like the fact that you left him So when you take a man back, you got to move very slowly And you got to make sure that he's growing not that he's doing what you want him to do Is he growing for himself? Is he reading books taking courses talking with mentors doing coaching Learning and growing is he changing? Did he stop smoking? Did he stop getting drunk? Did he stop gambling? Did he stop watching nasty movies? Did he stop cursing so much? Did he stop playing video games all day? Did he stop, you know watching too much tv? Is he growing and changing? You can't just look at it like oh, he's doing everything I want him to do he going on this day He going on this counseling because he's just doing that for you. What is he doing for him? So that's what you got to realize does not and when you when you realize that there That's gonna help you now after three months of dating. Can I ask the guy? Where does he see this going? Nope, if he don't tell you where it's going then that means he don't see it's going no well Tony why does a man get scared when he knows it's about to happen? Marriage I'm in love with him and I know he's in love with me Um, well that I mean you You you you you got to understand the nature of a man Okay, the nature of a man love variety The nature of a man lives For that love emotional high that come from either making money Or sleeping with a woman So no man truly is gonna be jazz Oh get married. Yes, something to be better. Oh Oh one woman for the rest of my life. Yes One woman, you know, no man really Is gonna be Esthetic about that because this means that this is one person For the rest of your life This one set of eyes, ears, nose, legs Everything on chain. Okay They sitting up the day Couple year they could be Slapping knees, you know So he think about all that he and now he also think about his body gonna be changing But the thing about it is Same thing like like a woman you might look at this man and say man What if he catch halitosis? You know, what did he get ed? You know, so some women get cold feet too, but Because society has connected a woman's worth With marriage a lot of women see marriage totally different than men So it's not really, you know, this horrible thing that he got a little bit of You know cold feet. He really also just Checking himself to say like, okay Do I got what it take as a man to be 100 faithful for the next 50 years? You know, it it ain't it ain't as easy as we want it to be because humans Especially when you got so many men out here When you got doctors and scientists saying that monogamy isn't real that we're not built to be monogamous So like when you got all these studies and evidence and these people saying this stuff They're gonna get into that's gonna get into a man head So sometimes it's really something a little bit about that that he just trying to battle the negative voices Evet god bless you now a good guy that I've been dating for one year Never been intimate. The problem is I'm not all that physically attracted. Is it possible to overcome this? I don't want him to become impatient Nice guy not listening now evet I answer questions about men's Because I'm a man. So I understand men now me personally I don't know if women Get over a man not being physically attractive So I I don't know that right there now And because he hears a thing a woman Typically is more understanding of a man who is looks challenged so therefore When you are apprehensive about the physical aspect of the relationship That's a red flag because a lot of men are so superficial That when a man is concerned about the physical aspect of the relationship You know it could it's hit or miss he could be just being too picky But when it's a lot of women with looks challenged husbands It's a lot of women with looks challenged boyfriends. It's a lot of women who look at the heart You know, it's a lot of women dating men that Tall ain't no taller than this bottle You know, it's a lot of women dating men built like this bottle And so women a lot of time could see the heart of a man So when you were about the physical aspect That's when it's case to worry. Okay, that's that's when you got to the little son the word body and it's been a year The other thing is that women won't love women won't marriage So that that a lot of women won't that so if you got cold feet at one year That's not a good sign. That's not a good sign because that's what love and marriage that's what you want That he won't that less than you so if you got cold feet Hey, so I'm going on in now Kiera God bless you now. How do I co-parent with my ex when his ex-wife? threatened uh herself if he married me he's back with her and their two kids At what age should I let my baby go stay overnight? I don't want my baby in that environment Hey, keep your baby. Okay. Keep your baby Keep your baby long as you want to keep your baby. All right But when a woman says something like that right there Listen My child ain't going nowhere near that woman. You hear me? My child might be eight Yeah, he want to see the child he come over to your place and she got to deal with it She won't too. She could sit outside in the car in the air condition or no air condition if they low on gas Or she could stand outside But he coming over here If i'm you he coming over here to see the child child ain't going over there with no woman that that was making them kind of Threats absolutely not And in my child he was going it up my child going over there with a gopro wrapped around the head Got a gopro on the head got a gopro on the arm got a nanny cam I got the body cam on them what the police well on on the onesy That right there protect your child Now that's one thing I want you all to understand every woman on hill and man on hill with children protect your children Because nobody can protect them But you and one thing that I see a lot of people doing wrong Who got children is they dating around And they dating all these people and you bringing all these people to your house And your children meeting all these men or meeting all these women And they confused like why daddy got so many friends why mama got so many friends then when they get 13 14 15 They realized what them friends was doing so now they say oh, let me go do that So now your child out here will it nearly on they back Then they making babies at 16 17 all because they remember Seeing what you was doing and you an adult an adult supposed to know what they doing to have some sense But they saw you doing it. So it's so many men and women. That's neglecting They children looking for some Loose booty for some loves ain't even looking for love just looking for some for a warm body. So listen y'all got to stop doing that When you bring a child in the world It's all about that child Everything is about because that child ain't asked to be here You got on your bike and you brought them So now it's on you to take care of ain't nothing ain't nothing else Hey y'all shout out to moderators for helping me out trying to keep the chat clear the chat open up at um, you know 15 minutes left and so we we Done come to and I really appreciate y'all for being on here tonight everybody that sent a blessing Thank you so much everybody that's in the blessed tribe Thank you for being in the blessed try because you blessing me every month for those of you I miss I know I I miss some of you But I was reading the questions at the top and I saw you put something in the chat. I missed some of them Please forgive me You know count it all love I see somebody up here Jacqueline. I see you right there Bridget Joy, I see you If I hope I'm saying your name, right? So I'm catching some of you um Shayla I see I answer your question and Jero So fire bless you Shayla How do you date for marriage as a single mother? Hopefully you got that answer tonight saline Hey, I really appreciate y'all and I'm gonna tell you Now let me cut this here chat on all Now I'm gonna tell y'all, you know based on what I seen here tonight You really got to set new standards for your life You got to set standards for your life And you got to know the difference between standards and preferences Now see this this was something that I came up with Now it's a lot of coaches not done spent off of and they teaching their own way Some people saying standards and priorities Standards and preferences your standards is rooted in your morals and your values Your preferences is just your likes and your dislikes your wants So you got to set your standards and your standards is not just You know what you who you want to be with what characteristics you want them to have But your standards is also how you want to be treated how you want to be talked to What does your ideal relationship look like see you you got to sit down and write it out And then read it off to yourself. That's what you got to do Because the problem with the relationships of today Is you're going in without any Pre-requisites you going in without any Requirements you going in without your standards being established So when you don't know what you want you're going to get whatever somebody want to give And you have to understand who you are You got to understand what a real woman is And what she looks like what a real man is and what he looks like and what a real relationship is And what real love is and what they look like When you got that knowledge Now you set up to be successful. But see when you just going in there willy-nilly You're going to end up in all kind of situations. And then next thing you know You're going to be like a lot of people that was on here tonight You're going to be like a lot of people that was on here tonight. Hey tony. It's been three years It's been five years. It's been seven years. It's been 10 years And we still ain't got nothing You don't want to end up like that and the way you avoid that is to know who you are What you deserve and what you want before you even get in the day feel So when you meet it, you know If this is for you or not Hey, now this tony guys God bless y'all. I really appreciate y'all and um Lord will and I can make it on here tonight. I ain't a hundred percent sure But god bless you. We'll talk soon