 Mother, why did daddy switch to Post-Em? Your father says there's no caffeine in Post-Em, nothing to spoil your sleep, and your father knows best. Yes, it's Father Knows Best transcribed in Hollywood starring Robert Young as father. A half hour visit with your neighbors, the Andersons, brought to you by Instant Post-Em, the good tasting drink that's entirely caffeine free and by Post's 40% brand flakes, America's largest selling brand flakes. There's something about cog wheels, levers, gears, and springs that holds a certain fascination for the male species. The feminine faction, however, is not so enraptured, especially when the aforementioned cog wheels, levers, gears, and springs are spread all over the dining room table. And that's the way it is with the Andersons as we check in on a Saturday morning at the White Frame House on Maple Street, like this. Jim, you have a perfectly good workbench out in the garage. Why don't you repair the clock out there? Margaret, I'll be through here in just a minute. You've been saying that for the last two hours. But I can use your help here. Okay. Now hand me those tools as I need them. Uh, screwdriver. Okay, here you are. Now, pliers, tweezers, forceps, scalpel. All right, bud. Cut it out. This is nerve-wracking work. Oh, gosh, Dad, this whole thing sounds like an operation. Yes, and I'm afraid the patient isn't going to make it. Jim, those old clocks require a special skill. When mother and dad had the clock, they always took it to- Margaret, please, I've just about got it licked. Say, Mommy, what's all this junk on the table? Sh, Kathy, there's a genius at work. Now, see this spring here, bud? All I have to do is coil it up good and tight like this. Now, as I hold the spring with the pliers, I want you, bud, to open the little door in back of the clock. Okay, there you are. That's it. Now, I gently slip the coil spring inside, like this. Easy. Easy. No. That's what I call making time fly. Very funny. Now, help me pick up the parts. Jim, Mr. Timkins, the jeweler, specializes in clocks like this. Why don't you run down there and- Margaret, do you mind? I'll fix the clock. Yes, dear. Dad, since you're having such a tough time with the spring, why don't you put that in first and work around it? Well, yes. I guess I could do that. Where is the spring? The last time I saw it, it was flying over the bookcase and heading south. Oh, bring it here, kitten. Thank you. Now, the important thing is to get the spring coil good and tight. There we are. Now, bud, open the back of the clock again. Okay. All right. Now, this is more like it. Now, I set the spring in like this. Just a little more. A little more. Mother, guess what? Oh, Betty, do you have to bust into the house like that? What's wrong, Father? Now, where did that spring go? It set a new record, Dad. It landed on the mantle. Oh, it was delirious. All of us girls went down to the train and met Ronnie. Ronnie? Ronnie who? Ronnie Kelso, the singer. He's only the rage of the whole country. Father, don't you keep up on anything? Not the important things. You mean the goon, the croons? Quiet, Junior. And Mother, while we were down at the depot, Ronnie's publicity man came over and said that Ronnie wanted to invite one of us girls to have lunch with him. And because I have a bigger collection of Ronnie's records than the rest of the girls, they chose me. Isn't that dreamy? I'd say you were very fortunate. Am I? Father, did you hear what I said? Yes, I heard what you said. Kathy, hand me the screwdriver. But Father, don't you understand? Your daughter is having lunch with the most popular singer in the country. Am I to assume that this is the same fellow whose record you play all the time up in your room? That's right. I question his popularity. Now you're taking an old, foggy attitude. What? If you were 16 or 17, his voice would do something to you. It has done something to me, and I don't like it. No one in this world, but no one sings like Ronnie Kelso. There's something about him, the way he sighs when he croons. Yeah, he sounds like a slow leak in a tire. Mother, can't you do something about that son of yours? But that's enough. You should hear him. He pants like a Saint Bernard when he sings. I love you. Brother. Oh, how awful. You aren't kidding. Where's that cogwheel that was here? Here it is, Daddy. Oh, thanks. Oh, it's probably for me. Hello. Oh, hi, Ralph. No, I'm sorry. Ralph, I won't be able to see you this afternoon. I have a very important engagement with, well, with someone. No, it's not him. It's Ronnie Kelso. Well, it is. I'm meeting him in front of the Olympic Hotel at one o'clock, and he's taking me to lunch, so there. Now, Ralph, don't be like that. The only reason I was attracted to Ronnie is because he reminds me of you. The same mannerism, the same kind of personality, and you look quite a bit alike. If I was Ralph, I'd see my lawyer. Certainly I remember, Ralph. We have a roller skating date for this evening. See you then. Goodbye. Mother, can I wear your pearl appell pen? Well... Oh, please, Mother, I must look my best for Ronnie. I guess so. Have you something to go with it? Let's see. Oh, I know. I'll call Janie. Now, don't start borrowing a lot of things. Oh, she'll be utterly thrilled to have her bracelet meet Ronnie. Hello, Janie. Betty. I'm sorry, Janie, that the rest of you kids can't go today, but... What? Yes, I know. I can't believe it myself. There, I'll be eating lunch and across the table looking at me with those soulful eyes will be Ronnie. What a way to get into gestion. But... Oh, Janie, Mother's letting me wear her pearl appell pen and I was wondering if I could borrow that new bracelet of yours. Oh, thanks a lot. Ruth's letting me wear that cute blouse of hers and Doris is letting me have her black velvet purse. Margaret. Yes, Jim? Doesn't that daughter of ours wear anything that belongs to her? Yes, all the girls do this. But it sounds like she's being clothed through the courtesy of the community. Well, Agnes offered me her plaid skirt If she lost her friends, she'd freeze to death. All right, Janie. And don't worry, I'll let you know about everything that goes on. Goodbye. Well, I better get upstairs and start to get ready. Yes, you haven't got much time. Yes, dear? Where are those bobby pins you bought the other day? They're on my dresser. Thanks. Well, I'm glad to hear that we're contributing something to this moment. Now, with all the excitement having subsided, maybe I can get this clock in order. Kathy, give me that little round disk you have in your hand. This? Yes, give it to me. But, Daddy. Would you please hand it over? OK. Thank you. I'm having enough trouble without you holding out parts on me. Let's see. It should go right here. No. Maybe it slips over this little bar. No. That's funny. This disk doesn't seem to fit any place. Maybe it's because it's a wheel off the wheel. Oh, no. Daddy, I tried to tell you, but you... Jim, why don't you take the clock down to Mr. Timkins? Mother! Yes, Betty? What happened to this picture of Ronnie I have hanging on my wall? Something wrong? It's... Bud, do you know anything about it? Me? I never go into her stale room. Kathy? Yes, Mother? Do you know anything about Ronnie's picture? Well... Come on. Well, Patty, do you know anything about Ronnie's picture? Come on. Well, Patty, Davis, and I were playing darts, and we needed the target. Kathleen, you didn't! Ronnie's turned up nose made a peachy bullseye. Anything, Betty? Don't worry. She'll be home as soon as she gets fed up with Loverboy Kelso. Shouldn't take long. Margaret, can I borrow your nail file? My nail file? I think you'll find it in the... Jim, you aren't back to fooling with that clock again. I thought you gave that up hours ago. I did. But as I was getting ready to take it down to the jewelers, I happened to notice something. See this notch on this lever here? Yeah. Well, that's where the spring is supposed to be anchored, and it'll keep it from flying out. Uh-huh. Margaret, you seem to doubt me. No, but I wouldn't start repairing it until I put on Bud's catcher's mask. They're getting worse than the kids. Look, I've got the spring all coiled up, and I just set it in place. Like that. See there? Perfect. Stand back, Jim. That was merely the spring settling in place. Believe me, Margaret, I've solved it. All the parts are in order. Proud of me. I'm proud of you, dear. And I could never have done it without your helpful words of discouragement. Oh, Jim, I'm not that bad. Ah, here comes our illustrious daughter now. How did you make out, Betty? Please, Father, it's not Betty. From now on, it's Beth. Beth? That's what Ronnie calls me. Oh, so that's it. As Ronnie said, a girl of my sophistication and cosmopolitan quality should only be known as Beth. Betty is far too pedestrian. Uh, how was the lunch, dear? I wouldn't know, Mother. I couldn't eat. Don't tell me he was that bad. In Ronnie's presence, material things seem so unimportant. I'd say you were slightly taken by the gentleman. Mother, I want you and Father to be the first to know from now on, it's Ronnie and I. Oh, now, Betty. I know. You'll say I've gone off the deep end. You've not only gone off the deep end, you've landed on your head. Go ahead, Father, make fun. In the first place, he's too old for you. He's not old. He's just more mature. And a little prematurely gray. But, Betty, this is only the first time you've met him. And it was just a luncheon date. Yes, but before the lunch was over, Ronnie was holding my hand. I hope he let go long enough to pick up the check. Jim, please. And while he was holding my hand, the photographer took our picture for the whole world to see. Probably some publicity stunt. Publicity stunt. Father, you and your crass commercialism. That picture was taken to record the cherished moment when the paths of two lonely people entwined. Margaret, is this our daughter? Be patient, Jim. Be patient, she says. That's right, Mother. Treat me like a child. Betty, you've got to be kidding. Father, one doesn't kid about such things. I'll get it. Bet speaking. Oh, hello, Ralph. What? No, I'm sorry, Ralph. I'll have to call off our date for tonight. Now, just a minute, young lady. Ralph, I mustn't see you tonight or ever. It wouldn't be fair to Ronnie. Betty, give me that phone. Yes, I know we were supposed to go roller skating, and the very thought of it depresses me. It's so juvenile, so immature. Betty? If you'd like to drop by later, I'll explain everything. Goodbye. Betty, this silly business has gone far enough. Ralph is a bird brain, but you did make a date with him for tonight, and you're going to keep it. I can't, Father. I mustn't. You get on that phone and call Ralph back. Don't you stamp your foot at me, young lady. Now, you call Ralph right this minute. I won't, I won't, I won't. Oh, fine. Now, Bet, you can get a sack and help me gather up the clock. Looks like Jim's clock was really fixed this time. But speaking of clocks, how about time-out for Ed Prentice? He has some mighty good advice for you, especially if you haven't been in tick-tock condition lately. Ed? Say, friend, how have you been feeling these days? Have you been sort of jittery on edge? Well, it could be the caffeine in your coffee or tea that's been bothering you, stealing your sleep and making you nervous. I know because caffeine bothered me plenty until I switched to post-em. Good old instant post-em. Why don't you make the switch yourself? Believe you me, post-em really works. It ought to, it's absolutely caffeine-free. Contains no caffeine. None whatsoever. So you see, instant post-em is a good hot drink you can enjoy anytime without risking coffee nerves, without losing your sleep. Now, of course, caffeine doesn't bother everybody. Lots of folks can handle it okay. But if it troubles you, just make that simple, easy switch post-em. Try post-em for 30 days. Why not? See if you're not sleeping better, looking and feeling better too. Thanks to instant post-em. Oh, and say, the kids will like post-em too and of course you can give them post-em often because there's nothing in post-em to harm them. Yes, sir? Post-em's the drink for the whole family. Get a jar tomorrow. Poets, songwriters, romanticists in general from the beginning of time have asked the question, what should we call love? Up to now, no satisfactory answer has been recorded. However, Betty Anderson, alias, Bette Anderson, after a two-hour luncheon date with Ronnie Kelso, the popular singer, feels she has experienced the real thing. Jim feels that it's merely a question of Ronnie Itis and should disappear about seven o'clock this evening. As for Bud and Kathy, they just stand around the kitchen and ask questions, like this. Mom, what's wrong with Betty? Nothing, Bud. Nothing at all. But there's got to be something wrong. She looks like a dying calf. Well, if you must know, she thinks she's in love with Ronnie Kelso. Oh, no, not that. It's nothing but a crush. A crush? She looks like she's been pulverized. Never mind, Bud. Let's just drop it. Well, I go through that when I'm Betty's age, Mommy. I imagine you will, dear. I sure hope not. It's not so bad. But by the look on her face, it must be awful painful. Someday love will come to you, Kathy, and when it does, you'll know it. It'll be the most beautiful thing that has ever happened to you. You'll meet a man who you'll think is the most wonderful person in all the world. I will. And this man will have the same interest that you do. You mean he'll like bullfrogs and tadpoles? Kathy. Yes, Mother. I think we can postpone our little discussion until a later date. Say, uh, about 1960. Oh, Margaret. Look. Jim, the clock. It's all in one piece. Yes, it's all fixed. Daddy. Yes, kitten. Mommy says that when I'm Betty's age, I might fall in love or have a crush on a fellow. I hope not. Jim, let's not be bitter. Believe me, Margaret, I couldn't go through this again. Well, it's going to happen to Kathy, so you might as well accept it. Well, maybe when Kathy's Betty's age, there'll be a vaccine we can give her to prevent it. No, Jim. Have you seen Betty recently? I saw her just before she went up to her room. What a sight. She walks around listlessly, mouth open, eyes drooping. She looks like the ad. Don't let this happen to you. I just hope she comes out of it. She better come out of it. If she doesn't keep that date with Ralph like she promised, there's going to be some fireworks around here. Want me to get the hairbrush, Daddy? I'll get it. Hello? It's for you, bet. No, it's not the tonsil. It's Janie. Who was it, bud? Janie. She probably wants to get all the dirt on what happened at lunch today. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I'll sneak in and listen. Kathy, you be careful. What time is it there by the clock on the stove? I want to set this clock here. So you finally got it fake. I most certainly did. And I trust that my perseverance and stick-to-itiveness will prove an object lesson to the scorners around here. What time did you say it was? Four o'clock, straight up. All right, I'll set it for exactly four o'clock. There. Bud, get me the screwdriver off the dining room table. Jim, don't you dare take that clock apart again. What if we're adding on a couple of bongs every time the clock strikes? At midnight, it'll be 14 o'clock. Maybe I wound it a little more. It isn't ticking, Jim. All right, you win. I'll take it over to the jewelers Monday on my way to work. Daddy, guess what? Betty is going to Cincinnati. Now, kitten, you're making that up. No, really. I just heard her tell Janie on the phone she's going next Saturday. It's something about Ronnie. Margaret, I detest eavesdropping, but this should be very enlightening. Very enlightening. You kids stay here. Be quiet now. Yes. Oh, you're right, Janie. No. No, of course. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. No. No. Very enlightening, Jim. Quiet, Margaret. Well, you see, Janie, my plans are to... Listen now, Margaret. Uh-huh. Of course. Yes. Yes. No. I wish that Janie would shut up for a minute. No, I haven't told the folks yet. I want to break it to them gently. Father, oh, he'll hit the ceiling and probably stay there for three or four days. Yes, it's so hard to make him understand. Of course, when you get up in years like that... Margaret, I'm going to... All right, Janie, keep your fingers crossed for me. Bye. Margaret, walk in as if nothing is wrong. Uh, hi, Bat. Oh, hello, Father. What's new? Nothing. Excuse me, I have to be getting up to my room. What do you hear from Cincinnati? Father, you mean you overheard my conversation? Yes, I was up on the ceiling listening in. Betty, what is this Cincinnati business? Please, I have to get up to my room. You stay right here, young lady. We're going to get this straightened out once and for all. You won't get angry. There'll be no guarantee. Well, next Saturday, Ronnie's opening at the Capitol Theater in Cincinnati. And you're planning on being there? Yes, I thought I'd buzz back. You'll be buzzing, young lady, but it won't be to Cincinnati. Oh, but I must. Ronnie's counting on me. He gave me a ticket to the theater, and my presence will mean so much to his performance. You aren't going, and that's final. But, Father... The discussion is over. I'm sorry, Father, but I'm going if I have to run away to do it. Well... Margaret, this situation has to be met head-on. Head-on? Seems like we've already had quite a collision. When did Betty say this Ronnie was staying? At the Olympic Hotel. But, Jim, you wouldn't. I wouldn't? Nobody's going to lead my daughter on like this. But Jim, he's a celebrity. I doubt if you could get in to see him. I'll get in to see him. Don't worry. Where's my hat? Over there on the table. But, Jim, please don't lose your head. Relax, Margaret. I know what I'm doing. I'll see you in a little while. Jim, you can't go downtown in your bedroom slippers. Oh, well, where are my shoes? Under the chair there. I got them. I'm going to set this pipsqueak right if it's the last thing I do. But, Jim, I don't like it when you get all steamed up like this and go off on a tangent. Margaret, don't worry about me. I tell you, I know what I'm doing. See you later. Yes? You've got your shoes on the wrong feet. Oh, don't tell me, Mother. He actually went down to the hotel. Yes, he's been gone for some time now. Oh, this is humiliating. I suppose he went down to try and break up our romance. Yes, and the way he stormed out of here, I hope that's all he breaks up. Well, I have no fears. Anything that Father says will have no effect on Ronnie and me. Our bond is too strong. Betty, I only wish that... He's, Mother. Bet. Sorry. Bet, I only wish that you would understand that... Wait a minute. What, Mother? Your father's coming up the walk and he has someone with him. Oh, Mother, I'm afraid. Stay here, Betty. It's better to face it now. Step right in. Margaret, Bet, I'd like you to meet someone. This is Gladys Kelso. Hi, Bet. Gladys Kelso? You mean you're Ronnie Kelso's wife? No, I'm afraid not. Thank goodness. I'm his daughter. That's right. And he'd kill me if he knew I sneaked out of the hotel room. But, but Ronnie seemed like... Is he old enough to have a daughter my age? Is he old enough? You should see him when he gets out of bed in the morning. Oh, Brother, you think women have beauty aids? He practically retreads his face. Please, I don't want to hear anymore. Now, don't think I'm being disrespectful. Pop's really a grand guy. The only time he gets mad at me is when I make him take his vitamin pills. All right, so he is a little older than I am. A little? Wait, I'll tell you what happened in Seattle. A bunch of teenage gals were gathered on the sidewalk, and they wouldn't go away until Dad threw down a lock of his hair. That's when he got burned up at me. What happened, Gladys? I threw down his whole toupee. I threw down his whole toupee. I threw down his whole toupee. I threw down his whole toupee. I'm not amused in the least. Don't take it so hard, kid. So he did hold your hand at lunch. Well, then you heard about it? Sis, he's held girls' hands from here to Albuquerque. It's all a part of the game. Well, what about the theater ticket? Oh, for the opening in Cincinnati? Hundreds of girls got tickets. That way, we're sure of a smash opening. Remember, kid, a crooner is only as good as a squeals he gets. I'll see who it is. It's Ralph Betts. It's Ralph Betts. It's Ralph Betts. I don't want to see Ralph. I don't want to see anybody. Now, just a minute. Betty, you promised Ralph you... Say, that Ralph looks like a real dreamboat. Betty, come back here. Say, I was just thinking, I'm going to be stuck in town tonight, Betty. If you don't want Ralph, I... Why, yes, Gladys. I think Betty would be glad to introduce you to Ralph. I'll be right out, Ralph. Uh, going to keep your date, Bet? From now on, it isn't Bet. It's Betty, plain and simple. Yes, and at times, how simple can you get? You know, that little melody reminds me that life is swell when you keep well. And I hope it makes you think of the new post 40% brand flakes, because as it says, they're good and so good for you. I mean that because something wonderful has happened to brand. The new post 40% brand flakes have a delicious new flavor, a magic oven flavor that many people like better than any other cereal. Yet they still give you the important keep regular benefits that only a brand cereal can offer. So, tomorrow or Saturday, when you go shopping, take home new post 40% brand flakes. America's largest selling brand flakes. They're so good. And so good for you. It's later in the evening at the White Frame House on Maple Street. And at the moment, it appears that a state of normalcy is set in. Betty is out on her date with Ralph, but is at the show and Margaret is dancing in the front room. The only thing to upset the calm is Kathy, who is trying to amuse herself with her toy airplane. Like this. Daddy, watch this three-point landing. Kathy, be careful with that airplane in here. Oh, Jim, these are precious. What are you looking at? I was just thumbing through this old album. Look at these pictures, would you? Let's see. Say they are a riot. Ha, ha, ha. Who's this fella here with his mouth open and his eyes drooping in an expression like a dying calf? That's a picture of you on the day you met me. Here she goes again. Watch her take off. Kathy, I told you not to fly that airplane in here. Hey, let her go. Kathy, that plane will crash into something as sure as... See there, it hit the clock. Kathy, if I've told you once, I've told you... Listen, listen. Well, what do you know? It's running. Father Knows Best, starring Robert Young as Jim Anderson. Until then, good night and good luck from the makers of Post's 40% brand flakes, America's largest selling brand flakes, and Instant Postom, the drink that's entirely caffeine free. In our cast were Ted Donaldson, his bud, Gene Vanderpile, Rhoda Williams, Helen Strom, and Mary Lee Robb. It comes in a red, white, and blue box. What is it? Hot post wheat meal. It has the picture of Roy Rogers on the package. What is it? It's packed full of whole wheat nourishment. What is it? It has a rich, delicious, nut-like flavor. What is it? Cooks in just three minutes. Another member of the famous Post family. What is it? It's the best hot cereal you ever ate. Hot post... Father Knows Best was transcribed in Hollywood and written by Paul West and Dick Conway. This is Bill Foreman speaking. Tonight, play Truth or Consequences on NBC.