 Hey everyone, it's Isaac and I'm here to let you know that I actually started a Kickstarter for my new book and film I'm super excited about it I want you to go check it out right now in the link in my description here saying there's awesome rewards the book and the film is About building father-son relationships, and even if you're not a father or a son I think this is something really important to get involved with and encourage and support So um yeah, I'm super excited about the project, and I love it no matter who you are Get involved. Okay. I'll see you there. Hey guys. What's up, and welcome to today's video My name is Isaac and today we're gonna be talking about how to deal with conflict now You know as I was thinking about what I wanted to talk about today in today's video The question of like how to deal with conflict kept coming up because it's such like a prevalent issue We all have conflict in some way with people we encounter conflict And it often comes out seemingly out of nowhere Maybe a friend you had you know quick conflict with a friend and you were just like well that kind of surprised me And I don't know where that came from So I guess I kind of want to dive into at least began to dive into how do we deal with this conflict when it arises What is a biblical method to dealing with conflict? What how does conflict began? How do we avoid conflict in the first place? So maybe you take this video as maybe like a part one to how to deal with conflict because in this short video We're not gonna be able to address all the stuff, but I thought it was something relevant that we could talk about today Okay, so I want to continue our time today by jumping in the scriptures So let's jump into James for one to two I think this is a relevant verse as we talk about you know, how does conflict come about? Why is there conflict? You know this kind of thing. So let's let's read it What causes quirls and what causes fights among you? Is it not this that your passions are at war within you you desire and you do not have So you murder you covet and cannot obtain so you fight and quirl You do not have because you do not ask. You see the author is kind of asking is in this letter What is it that is causing these this conflict among you? What is it that it's causing these quirls among you? It's because you desire and do not have You have these passions in yourself, but you don't get what you want and therefore you curl You see I think this is a foundational key to remember as we're thinking about how conflict comes about And it's something to be aware of as you're trying to avoid conflict You see we all have expectations of other people and often they go unspoken We help we hope that maybe our sibling is gonna do something for us or as parents they think you know My kid is gonna take out the trash. I expect this of them But you know what what happens when Timmy doesn't take out the trash what happens when my sibling? I thought that they were gonna leave me the family car, but it instead they took it for themselves Well, I get angry. My desires weren't met. So you see we have these desires. We have these Expectations and when they go unmet that's when conflict can arise You see to some extent we all have this idea in a in of ourselves and it's a simple idea That we should get what we want. Oh, I want something and we got a plane here. Okay, we're gonna battle through here I want something I want the plane to stop being so loud so I can film the video I have an expectation and you know a lot of us have these expectations of other people And when they go unmet we get angry because you know what we feel like no we should get what we want So what fuels this kind of conflict? It really is a selfishness and pride when in regard to this kind of conflict We want things we desire things of other people we expect things and when those things don't happen We get angry and we and they becomes the becomes conflict there So what I want to get across to you today is this idea that look We don't we don't always get what we want and you know what that's a good thing Because we're not God we shouldn't get what we want because often what we want is not only sinful but it's selfish We want it because we want it. We're not thinking of other people And this is a key that I that I want to get across to you as we're thinking about Conflict is thinking about other people because sometimes we get so Self-obsessed in in in conflict we say we start wallowing this idea that I didn't get what I wanted I wanted this thing. I wanted that. I can't believe they did. I can't believe how could they do that to me? And we start forgetting about this idea of loving one another So as we reorient our perspective on how can we love people instead of how can we get what we want? I think that's the key as we talk about conflict and avoiding conflict I want to read this verse for you here. It's first Corinthians 13 for love is patient and kind love does not envy or boast it is not Eregan or rude it does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful how often in your life and I am thinking about myself too in this is how we've been How have we been resentful towards a person when we didn't get what we wanted or when they had didn't fulfill our expectations we become resentful we become Angry we're prideful and boastful and of ourselves because we feel like we should get what we want But today what I want you to consider and what I want you to examine your heart for Is this idea of loving one another love is patient? Love is kind Love does not boast love is not irritable these ideas of what is true Love true biblical love. We ought to be taking this in as we're trying to not only avoid conflict because obviously Conflict sucks conflict sucks some people thrive off it me. I hate it. I hate it But you know, it's not necessarily about the conflict itself in being like oh well I'm arguing with this person. It's the heart issues at the core It's the heart issues at the core because if we you know examine our heart and we find out You know what? I have expectations of other people and when I you know, I value myself more than other people I value what I want more than other people and that's how I get into these Conflicts and these arguments so I guess what I want to ask you and this is just the beginning of the conversation We're gonna have together, but I want to ask you to examine your heart And I want to point you to this idea of love and being patient with one another regarding yourself as less than others and Really tampering your expectations of other people. It's not that we shouldn't have any Expectations of others. Of course, we should we should have certain expectations of people but unrealistic Expectations are just the breeding ground for conflict and we have when we have unmet expectations and un Unverbalized expectations We're just bound to get into conflict when I expect something of you and I didn't communicate that with you You know, I'm just asking to get an argument with you and be frustrated with you when you don't do it. So Continue to communicate and communication is so important as we think about avoiding conflict Those are the couple of my thoughts In regard to this but let me know what you have to say about dealing with conflict I know there's so many facets of conflict I just wanted to touch on one in our expectations and that kind of thing But let me know in the comments down below what you think and some tips And maybe foundational principles that we ought to be looking at biblical principles that we ought to be looking at As we're gonna try to avoid conflict and deal with conflict in our lives how we should regard it that type of thing Let me know in the comments down below if you enjoyed this video be sure to give it a like and Also, if you'd like these types of videos that I'm doing, please subscribe to the channel. It's growing all the time It's really exciting. We're doing, you know content based on helping you become an authentic inspired and passionate Disciple of Christ this idea of discipleship walking together with Christ Join the community. It's a lot of fun guys and I'll see you next time. Bye guys