 Dedication and Preface to Don Quixote, Volume 2. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, visit LibriVox.org. Don Quixote, Volume 2 by Miguel Cervantes de Saavedra. Translated by John Ormsby. Dedication of Volume 2. To the Count of Limos. These days passed when sending your excellency my plays that had appeared in print before being shown on the stage, I said, if I remember well, that Don Quixote was putting on his spurs to go and render homage to your excellency. Now I say that with his spurs he is on his way. Should he reach destination, he thinks I shall have rendered some service to your excellency, as from many parts I am urged to send him off, so as to dispel the loathing and disgust caused by another Don Quixote, who, under the name of second part, has run masquerading through the whole world. And he who has shown the greatest longing for him has been the great emperor of China, who wrote me a letter in Chinese a month ago and sent it by a special courier. He asked me, or to be truthful, he begged me to send him Don Quixote, for he intended to found a college where the Spanish tongue would be taught. And it was his wish that the book to be read should be the history of Don Quixote. He also added that I should go and be the rector of this college. I asked the bearer if his majesty had afforded a sum in aid of my travel expenses. He answered, no, not even in thought. Then, brother, I replied, you can return to your China post haste, or at whatever haste you are bound to go, as I am not fit for so long a travel, and, besides being ill, I am very much without money, while emperor for emperor and monarch for monarch, I have at Naples the great count of Limos, who, without so many petty titles of colleges and rectorships, sustains me, protects me, and does me more favor than I can wish for. Thus I gave his leave, and I beg mine from you, offering your excellency the A book I shall finish within four months, deo volante, and which will be either the worst or the best that has been composed in our language, I mean of those intended for entertainment. At which I repent of having called it the worst, for, in the opinion of friends, it is bound to attain the summit of possible quality. May your excellency return in such health that is wished you. Purcellis will be ready to kiss your hand and eye, your feet, being as I am, your excellency's most humble servant. From Madrid, this last day of October of the year 1600, at the service of your excellency, Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, the author's preface. God bless me, gentle, or it may be plebeian reader, how eagerly must thou be looking forward to this preface, expecting to find their retaliation, scolding, and disdain, against the author of the second Don Quixote. I mean him, who was, they say, begotten at Tordesillas and born at Tarragona. Well, then the truth is, I am not going to give thee that satisfaction, for, though injuries stir up anger in humbler breasts, in mine the rule must admit of an exception. Thou wouldst have me call him ass, fool, and malapurt, but I have no such intention. Let his offence be his punishment. With his bread let him eat it, and there's an end of it. What I cannot help taking amiss is that he charges me with being old and one-handed, as if it had been in my power to keep time from passing over me, or as if the loss of my hand had been brought about in some tavern, and not on the grandest occasion the past or present has seen, or the future can hope to see. If my wounds have no beauty to the beholder's eye, they are at least honorable in the estimation of those who know where they were received. For the soldier shows to greater advantage dead in battle than alive in flight, and so strongly is this my feeling, that if my wounds are strong, that if now it were proposed to perform an impossibility for me, I would rather have had my share in that mighty action than be free from my wounds this minute, without having been present at it. Those the soldier shows on his face and breasts are stars that direct others to the heaven of honor and ambition of merited praise, and moreover it is to be observed that it is not with gray hairs that one writes, but with the understanding, and that commonly improves with years. I take it amiss too that he calls me envious and explains to me, as if I were ignorant what envy is. For really and truly, of the two kinds there are, I only know that which is holy, noble and high-minded, and if that be so, as it is, I am not likely to attack a priest above all, if in addition he holds the rank of familiar of the holy office. And if he said what he did, on account of him on whose behalf it seems he spoke, he is entirely mistaken. For I worship the genius of that person and admire his works and his unceasing and strenuous industry. After all, I am grateful to this gentleman, the author, for saying that these novels are more satirical than exemplary, but that they are good, for they could not be that unless there was a little of everything in them. I suspect thou wilt say that I am taking a very humble line and keeping myself too much within the bounds of my moderation, from a feeling that additional suffering should not be inflicted upon a sufferer, and that what this gentleman has to endure must doubtless be very great, as he does not dare to come out into the open field and broad daylight, but hides his name and disguises his country as if he had been guilty of some Lee's majesty. If perchance thou shouldst come to know him, tell him from me that I do not hold myself aggrieved, for I know well what the temptations of the devil are, and that one of the greatest is putting it into a man's head that he can write and print a book by which he will get as much fame as money, and as much money as fame. And to prove it I will beg of you, in your own sprightly pleasant way, to tell him this story. There was a madman in Seville who took to one of the drullest absurdities and vagaries that ever madman in the world gave way to. It was this. He made a tube of reed, sharp at one end, and, catching a dog in the street, or wherever it might be, he with his foot held one of its legs fast, and with his hand lifted up the other, and as best he could, fixed the tube, where, by blowing, he made the dog as round as a ball. Then, holding it in this position, he gave it a couple of slaps on the belly, and let it go, saying to the bystanders, and there were always plenty of them, do your worships think now that it is an easy thing to blow up a dog? Does your worship think now that it is an easy thing to write a book? And, if this story does not suit him, you may, dear reader, tell him this one, which is likewise, of a madman and a dog. In Cordova there was another madman, whose way it was to carry a piece of marble slab, or a stone, not of the lightest, on his head, and when he came upon any unwary dog, he used to draw close to him and let the weight fall right on top of him, on which the dog, in a rage, barking and howling, would run three streets without stopping. It so happened, however, that one of the dogs he discharged his load upon was a cat-maker's dog, of which his master was very fond. The stone came down, hitting it, on the head. The dog raised a yell at the blow. The master saw the affair, and was wroth, and snatching up a measuring yard, rushed out at the madman, and did not leave a sound bone in his body, and at every stroke he gave him, he said, You dog, you thief, my lurcher, don't you see, you brute, that my dog is a lurcher? And so, repeating the word lurcher again and again, he sent the madman away, beaten to a jelly. The madman took the lesson to heart and vanished, and for more than a month never once showed himself in public. But after that he came out again with his old trick, and a heavier load than ever. He came up to where there was a dog, and, examining it very carefully without venturing to let the stone fall, he said, This is a lurcher. Where? In short, all the dogs he came across, be they mastiffs or terriers, he said were lurchers, and he discharged no more stones. Maybe it will be the same with this historian, that he will not venture another time to discharge the weight of his wit in books, which, being bad, are harder than stones. Tell him, too, that I do not care a farthing for the threat he holds out to me of depriving me of my profit by means of his book. For, to borrow from the famous interlude of the Perendenga, I say in answer to him, Long life to my lord the 24, and Christ be with us all. Long life to the great Conde de Lemos, whose Christian charity and well-known generosity support me against all the strokes of my cursed fortune, and long life to the supreme benevolence of his eminence of Toledo, Don Bernardo de Sandoval y Rojas. And what matter if there be no printing presses in the world, or if they print more books against me, then there are letters and the verses of mingo revulgo. These two princes, unsought by any adulation or flattery of mine, of their own goodness alone, have taken it upon them to show me kindness and protect me. And in this I consider myself happier and richer than if fortune had raised me to her greatest height in the ordinary way. The poor man may retain honor, but not the vicious. Poverty may cast a cloud over nobility, but cannot hide it all together. And as virtue of itself sheds a certain light, even though it be through the straits and chinks of pendery, it wins the esteem of lofty and noble spirits, and in consequence their protection. Thou needst say no more to him, nor will I say anything more to thee, save to tell thee to bear in mind that this second part of Don Quixote, which I offer thee, is cut by the same craftsman and from the same cloth as the first, and that in it I present the Don Quixote, continued, and at length dead and buried, so that no one may dare to bring forward any further evidence against him. For that already produced is sufficient, and suffice it, too, that some reputable person should have given an account of all these shrewd lunacies of his without going into the matter again. For abundance, even of good things, prevents them from being valued, and scarcity, even in the case of what is bad, confers a certain value. I was forgetting to tell thee that thou mayst expect the persilis, which I am now finishing, and also the second part of Galatea, end of the dedication and preface to the second volume of Don Quixote, read by Dennis Sayers in Modesto, California, for LibriVox. Spring 2007 Chapter 1 of Don Quixote, Volume 2 This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Don Quixote, Volume 2, by Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra. Translated by John Ormsby. Chapter 1 Of the interview the Curate and the Barber had with Don Quixote about his malady, C.D. Amiti Benangeli in the second part of this history and third sally of Don Quixote says that the Curate and the Barber remained nearly a month without seeing him lest they should recall or bring back to his recollection what had taken place. They did not, however, omit to visit his niece and housekeeper and charge them to be careful to treat him with attention and give him comforting things to eat and such as were good for the heart and the brain once he was plain to see all his misfortune preceded. The niece and housekeeper replied that they did so and meant to do so with all possible care and acidity for they could perceive that their master was now and then beginning to show signs of being in his right mind. This gave great satisfaction to the Curate and the Barber, for they concluded they had taken the right course in carrying him off enchanted on the ox cart as had been described in the first part of this great as well as accurate history in the last chapter thereof. So they resolved to pay him a visit and test the improvement in his condition, although they thought it almost impossible that there could be any. And they agreed not to touch upon any point connected with night air entry so as not to run the risk of reopening wounds which were still so tender. They came to see him consequently and found him sitting up in bed in a green beige waistcoat and a red Toledo cap and so withered and dried up that he looked as if he had been turned into a mummy. They were very cordially received by him. They asked him after his health and he talked to them about himself very naturally and in very well chosen language. In the course of their conversation they fell to discussing what they call statecraft and systems of government, correcting this abuse and condemning that, reforming one practice and abolishing another, each of the three setting up for a new legislator, a modern Lycurgus or a brand new Solon, and so completely that they remodeled the state that they seem to have thrusted into a furnace and taken out something quite different from what they had put in. And on all the subjects they dealt with, Don Quixote spoke with such good sense that the pair of examiners were fully convinced that he was quite recovered and in his full senses. The niece and housekeeper were present at the conversation and could not find words enough to express their thanks to God at seeing their master so clear in his mind. Carrot however, changing his original plan, which was to avoid touching upon matters of chivalry, resolved to test Don Quixote's recovery thoroughly and see whether it were genuine or not. And so from one subject to another he came at last to talk of the news that had come from the capital and among other things he said it was considered certain that the Turk was coming down with a powerful fleet and that no one knew what his purpose was or when the great storm would burst and that all christened them was an apprehension of this which almost every year causes to arms and that his Majesty had made provision for the security of the coasts of Naples and Sicily and the island of Malta. To this Don Quixote replied, His Majesty has acted like a prudent warrior in providing for the safety of his realms in time so that the enemy may not find him unprepared. But if my advice were taken I would recommend him to adopt a measure which at present no doubt his Majesty is very far from thinking of. The moment the curate heard this he said to himself, God keep thee in his hand poor Don Quixote for it seems to me thou art precipitating thyself from the height of thy madness into the profound abyss of thy simplicity. But the barber who had the same suspicion as the curate asked Don Quixote what would be his advice as to the measures that he said ought to be adopted for perhaps it might prove to be one that would have to be added to the list of the many impertinent suggestions that people were in the habit of offering to princes. Mine, Master Shaver said Don Quixote, will not be impertinent but on the contrary, pertinent. I don't mean that said the barber but that experience has shown that all or most of the expedience which are proposed to his Majesty are either impossible or absurd or injurious to the King and to the Kingdom. Mine, however, reply Don Quixote, is neither impossible nor absurd but the easiest, the most reasonable, the readiest and most expeditious that could suggest itself to any projector's mind. You take a long time to tell it, Senor Don Quixote, said the curate. I don't choose to tell it here now, said Don Quixote, and have it reach the ears of the Lords of the Council tomorrow morning and some other carry off the thanks and rewards of my trouble. For my part, said the barber, I give my word here and before God that I will not repeat what your worship says to King, Rook or Earthly Man, an oath I learned from the Ballad of the Curate who, in the prelude, told the King of the Thief who had robbed him of the hundred gold crowns and his pacing mule. I am not versed in stories, said Don Quixote, but I know the oath is a good one because I know the barber to be an honest fellow. Even if he were not, said the curate, I will go bail and answer for him that in this matter he will be as silent as a dummy under pain of paying any penalty that may be pronounced. And who will be security for you, Senor Curate, said Don Quixote. My profession, replied the curate, which is to keep secrets. God's body, said Don Quixote at this, what more has His Majesty to do but to command by public proclamation all the nights errant that are scattered over Spain to assemble on a fixed day in the capital? Four, even if no more than half a dozen come, there may be one among them who alone will suffice to destroy the entire might of the Turk. Give me your attention and follow me. Is it, pray, any new thing for a single night errant to demolish an army of two hundred thousand men as if they all had but one throat or were made of sugar-paste? Nay, tell me how many histories are there filled with these marvels? If only in an evil hour for me, I don't speak for anyone else. The famous Don Bedelianis were alive now or any one of the innumerable progeny of Amadeus of Gaul. If any of these were alive today and were to come face to face with the Turk by my faith, I would not give much for the Turks' chance. But God will have regard for His people and will provide someone who, if not so valiant as the nights errant your at least will not be inferior to them in spirit. But God knows what I mean and I say no more. Alas exclaimed the niece at this may I die if my master does not want to turn night errant again. To which Don Quixote replied a night errant I shall die and let the Turk come down or go up when he likes and in as strong force as he can once more I say God knows what I mean. But here the barber said I ask your worships to give me leave to tell a short story of something that happened in Seville which comes so pat to the purpose just now that I should like greatly to tell it. Don Quixote gave him leave and the rest prepared to listen and he began thus. In the madhouse at Seville there was a man whom his relations had placed there as being out of his mind. He was a graduate of Osuna in Canon Law. But even if he had been of Salamanca it was the opinion of most people that he would have been mad all the same. This graduate after some years of confinement took it into his head that he was sane and in his full senses and under this impression wrote to the archbishop and treating him earnestly and in very correct language to have him released from the misery in which he was living. For by God's mercy he had now recovered his lost reason though his relations in order to enjoy his property kept him there. And in spite of the truth he would make him out to be mad until his dying day. The archbishop moved by repeated sensible well written letters directed one of his chaplains to make inquiry of the madhouse as to the truth of the licentious statements and to have an interview with the madmen himself and if it should appear that he was in his senses he would break out and restore him to liberty. The chaplain did so and the governor assured him that the man was still mad and that though he often spoke like a highly intelligent person he would in the end break out into nonsense that in quantity and quality counterbalanced all the sensible things he had said before as might be easily tested by talking to him. And obtaining access to the madmen conversed with him for an hour or more during the whole of which time he never uttered a word that was incorrect or absurd but on the contrary spoke so rationally that the chaplain was compelled to believe him to be sane. Among other things he said the governor was against him not to lose the presence his relations made him for reporting him still mad and that the worst foe he had in his misfortune was his large property for in order to enjoy it his enemies disparaged and threw doubts upon the mercy our Lord had shown him in turning him from a brute beast into a man. In short he spoke in such a way that he cast suspicion on the governor and made his relations appear covetous and heartless and himself so rational that the chaplain determined to take him away with him that the archbishop might see him and ascertain for himself the truth of the matter. Yielding to this conviction the worthy chaplain begged the governor to have the clothes in which the licentiate had entered the house given to him. The governor again bade him beware of what he was doing as the licentiate was beyond a doubt still mad but all his cautions and warnings were unavailing to dissuade the chaplain from taking him away. The governor seen that it was the order of the archbishop obeyed and they dressed the licentiate in his own clothes which were new and decent. He, as soon as he saw himself clothed like one in his senses and divested of the appearance of a madman and treated the chaplain to permit him in charity to go and take leave of his comrades the madman. The chaplain said he would go with him to see what madman there were in the house so they went upstairs and with them some of those who were present. Approaching a cage in which there was a furious madman though just at that moment calm and quiet the licentiate said to him, Brother, think if you have any commands for me for I am going home as God has been pleased in his infinite goodness and mercy without any merit of mine to restore me my reason. I am now cured and in my senses for with God's power nothing is impossible. Have strong hope and trust in him for as he has restored me to my original condition so likewise he will restore you if you trust in him. I will take care to send you some good things to eat and be sure you eat them for I would have you know I am convinced as one who has gone through it that all this madness of ours comes of having the stomach empty and the brains full of wind. Take courage take courage for despondency in misfortune breaks down health and brings on death. To all these words of the licentiate another madman in a cage opposite that of the furious one was listening and raising himself up from an old mad on which he lay stark naked he asked in a loud voice that was going away cured and in his senses the licentiate answered it is I brother who am going I have now no need to remain here any longer for which I return infinite thanks to heaven that has had so great mercy upon me mind what you are saying licentiate don't let the devil deceive you replied the madman keep quiet stay where you are and you will save yourself the trouble of coming back I know I am cured return the licentiate and that I shall not have to go stations again you cured said the madman well we shall see God be with you but I swear to you by Jupiter was majesty I represent on earth that for this crime alone which Seville is committing today and releasing you from this house and treating you as if you were in your senses I shall have to inflict such a punishment on it as will be remembered for ages and ages amen thus thou not know thou miserable little licentiate that I can do it being as I say Jupiter the thunderer who hold in my hands fiery bolts with which I am able and am want to threaten and waste the world but in one way only while I punish this ignorant town and that is by not reigning upon it nor on any part of this district or territory for three whole years to be reckoned from the day and moment when this threat is pronounced thou free thou cure in thy senses and I mad I disordered I bound I will as soon think of sending rain as of hanging myself those presents stood listening to the words and exclamations of the madmen but our licentiate turning to the chaplain and seizing him by the hands said to him be not uneasy Señor madmen has said for if he is Jupiter and will not send rain I who am Neptune the father and god of the waters will rain as often as it pleases me and may be needful the governor and the bystanders laughed and at their laughter the chaplain was half ashamed and he replied for all that Señor Neptune it will not do to vex Señor Jupiter remain where you are and some other day when there is a better opportunity and more time we will come back for you so they stripped the licentiate and he was left where he was and that's the end of the story so that's the story which came in so pat to the purpose that you could not help telling it Master Shaver, how blind is he who cannot see through a sieve is it possible that you do not know that comparisons of wit with wit valor with valor beauty with beauty birth with birth are always odious and unwelcome I, Master Barber, am not Neptune the god of the waters nor do I try to make anyone take me for an astute man for I am not one my only endeavor is to convince the world of the mistake it makes in not reviving in itself the happy time when the order of night errantry was in the field but our depraved age does not deserve to enjoy such a blessing as those ages enjoyed when night's errands took upon their shoulders the defense of kingdoms the protection of damsels the succour of orphans and minors the chastisement of the proud and the recompense of the humble with the nights of these days for the most part it is the damask, brocade and rich stuffs they wear that rustle as they go not the chain mail of their armor no night nowadays sleeps in the open field exposed to the inclemancy of heaven and in full panoply from head to foot no one now takes a nap as they call it without drawing his feet out of the stirrups and leaning upon his lands as the night's errands used to do no one now issuing from the wood penetrates yonder mountains and then treads the barren lonely shore of the sea mostly a tempestuous and stormy one and finding on the beach a little bark without oars sail, mast, or tackling of any kind the sensitivity of his heart flings himself into it and commits himself to the wrathful billows of the deep sea that one moment lift him up to heaven and the next plunge him into the depths and opposing his breast to the irresistible gale finds himself when he least expects it 3,000 leagues and more away from the place where he embarked and leaping ashore on a remote and unknown land has adventures that deserve to be written not on parchment but on brass but now sloth triumphs over energy indolence over exertion vice over virtue arrogance over courage and the theory over practice and arms which flourished and shone only in the golden ages and in night's errand for tell me who was more virtuous and more valiant than the famous amades of gole who more discreet than palmarin of england who more gracious and easy than tirante el blanco who more curtly than lesuarte of grease who more slashed or slashing than don belianis who more intrepid than perion of gole who more ready to face danger than felix marté of ircania who more sincere than splandian who more impetuous than don cirongilio of thres who more bold than rodemonte who more prudent than king sobrino who more daring than reinaldos who more invincible than roulande and who more gallant and courteous than rugero from whom the dukes of ferrara of the present day are descended according to terpen in his cosmography all these nights and many more that I could name senor curate where nights errant the light and glory of chivalry these or such as these I would have to carry out my plan and in that case his majesty would find himself well served and would save great expense and the Turk would be left tearing his beard and so I will stay where I am as the chaplain does not take me away and if jupiter as the barber has told us will not send rein here I am and I will rein when I please I say this that master basin may know that I understand him indeed senor don quixotes at the barber I did not mean it in that way and so help me god my intention was good and your worship ought not to be vexed as to whether I ought to be vexed or not return don quixote I myself am the best judge here upon the curate observed I have hardly said a word as yet and I would gladly be relieved of a doubt arising from what don quixote has said that worries and works my conscience the senor curate has lee for more than that return don quixote so he may declare his doubt for it is not pleasant to have a doubt on one's conscience well then with that permission said the curate I say my doubt is that all I can do I cannot persuade myself that the whole pack of knights you senor don quixote have mentioned were really and truly persons of flesh and blood that ever lived in the world on the contrary I suspected to be all fiction fable and falsehood and dreams told by men awakened from sleep or rather still half asleep that is another mistake reply don quixote into which many have fallen do not believe that there were ever such knights in the world and I have often with diverse people and on diverse occasions tried to expose this almost universal error to the light of truth sometimes I have not been successful in my purpose sometimes I have supporting it upon the shoulders of the truth which truth is so clear that I can almost say I have with my own eyes seen amades of gold who was a man of lofty stature fair complexion with a handsome tough black beard of accountants between gentle and stern an expression sparing of words slow to anger and quick to put it away from him and as I have depicted amades so I could I think portray and describe all the knights errant that are in all the histories in the world for by the perception I have that they were what their histories describe and by the deeds they did and the dispositions they displayed it is possible with the aid of sound philosophy to deduce their features complexion and stature how big in your worship's opinion may the giant morgante have been senor don quixote with regard to giants replied don quixote opinions differ as to whether there ever were any or not in the world but the holy scripture which cannot err by a jot from the truth shows us that there were when it gives us the history of that big philistine goliath who was seven cubits and a half in height huge size likewise in the island of Sicily there have been found leg bones and arm bones so large that their size makes it plain that their owners were giants and as tall as great towers geometry puts this fact beyond the doubt but for all that I cannot speak with certainty as to the size of morgante though I suspect he cannot have been very tall and I am inclined to be of this opinion because I find in the history in which his deeds are particularly mentioned that he frequently slept under a roof and as he found houses to contain him it is clear that his bulk could not have been anything excessive that is true said the curate and yielding to the enjoyment of hearing such nonsense he asked him what was his notion of the features of Reinaldos of Montalban and Don Roland and the rest of the 12 peers of France for they were all night's errant as for Reinaldos replied Don Quixote I ventured to say that he was broad-faced of ready complexion with roguish and somewhat prominent eyes and punctilious and touchy and given to the society of thieves and scapegraces with regard to Roland or Rotolando or Orlando for the histories call him by all these names I am of opinion and hold that he was of middle height broad-shouldered rather bow-legged swarthy complexion with a hairy body and a severe expression of continents a man of few words but very polite and well-bred if Roland was not a more graceful person than your worship has described said the curate it is no wonder that the fair lady Angelica rejected him and left him for the gaiety, liveliness and grace of that of budding bearded little more she surrendered herself and she showed her sense in falling in love with the gentle softness of Medoro rather than the roughness of Roland that Angelica, senor curate returned Don Quixote was a giddy dam so flighty and somewhat wanton and she left the world as full of her vagaries as of the fame of her beauty she treated with scorn a thousand gentlemen men of valour and wisdom and took up with a smooth face sprig of a page without fortune or fame except such reputation for gratitude as the affection he bore his friend got for him the great poet who sang her beauty the famous Ariosto not caring to sing her adventures after her contemptible surrender which probably were not over and above creditable dropped her where he says how she received the scepter of Cathay some bard of defter quill may sing some day and this was no doubt a kind of prophecy for poets are also called vates that is to say diviners and its truth was made plain for since then a famous Andalusian poet has lamented and sung her tears and another famous and rare poet a Castilian has sung her beauty tell me senor don Quixotes at the barber here among all those who praised her has there been no poet to write a satire on this lady Angelica I can well believe reply don Quixote that if Sacripante or Roland had been poets they would have given the damsel a trimming for it is naturally the way with poets who have been warned and rejected by their ladies whether fictitious or not in short by those whom they select as the ladies of their thoughts to avenge themselves in satires and libels a vengeance to be sure unworthy of generous hearts but up to the present I have not heard of any defamatory verse against the lady Angelica who turned the world upside down strange said the curate at this moment they heard the housekeeper and the niece who had previously withdrawn from the conversation exclaiming aloud in the courtyard and at the noise they all ran out end of chapter one chapter two of Don Quixote volume two this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Don Quixote volume two by Miguel de Cervantes Savedra translated by John Ormsby chapter two which treats of the notable altercation which Sancho Panza had with Don Quixote's niece and housekeeper together with other droll matters the history relates that the outcry Don Quixote the curate and the barber heard came from the niece and the housekeeper exclaiming to Sancho who was driving to force his way in to see Don Quixote while they held the door against him what does the vagabond want in this house be off to your own brother for it is you and no one else that delude my master and lead him astray and take him tramping about the country to which Sancho replied devil's own housekeeper deluded and led astray and taken tramping about the country and not thy master he has carried me all over the world and you are mightily mistaken he enticed me away from home by a trick promising me an island which I am still waiting for may evil islands choke thee thou detestable Sancho said the niece what are islands something to eat glutton and gourmandiser that thou art it is not something to eat replied Sancho but something to govern and rule and better than four cities or four judgeships at court for all that said the housekeeper you don't enter here you bag of mischief and sack of navery go govern your house and dig your seed patch and give over looking for islands or shylons the curate and the barber listened with great amusement to the words of the three but Don Quixote uneasy lest Sancho should blab and blurt out a whole heap of mischievous stupidities and touch upon points that might not be altogether to his credit called to him and made the other two hold their tongues and let him come in Sancho entered and the curate and the barber took their leave of Don Quixote whose recovery they despaired when they saw how wedded he was to his crazy ideas and how saturated with the nonsense of his unlucky chivalry and said the curate to the barber you will see gossip that when we are least thinking of it our gentlemen will be off once more for another flight I have no doubt of it returned the barber but I do not wonder so much at the madness of the night as at the simplicity of the squire who has such a firm belief in all that about the island that I suppose all the exposures that could be imagined would not get it out of his head God help them said the curate and let us be on the lookout to see what comes of all these absurdities of the night and the squire for it seems as if they had both been cast in the same cold and the madness of the master without the simplicity of the man would not be worth a far thing that is true said the barber and I should like very much to know what the pair are talking about at this very moment I promise you said the curate the niece or the housekeeper will tell us by and by for they are not the ones to forget to listen meanwhile Don Quixote shut himself in his room with Sancho and when they were alone he said to him it grieves me greatly Sancho that thou shouldst have said and sayest that I took the out of thy cottage when thou knowest I did not remain in my house we salad forth together we took the road together we wandered abroad together we have had the same fortune the same luck if they blanketed thee once they belabored me a hundred times and that is the only advantage I have of thee that was only reasonable replied Sancho for by what your worship says misfortunes belong more properly to knights errant than to their squires thou art mistaken Sancho said Don Quixote according to the maxim cuando caput dolet etc I don't understand any language but my own said Sancho I mean to say said Don Quixote that when the head suffers all the members suffer and so being thy lord and master I am thy head and thou a part of me as thou art my servant and therefore any evil that affects or shall affect me should give thee pain and what affects thee give pain to me it should be so said Sancho but when I was blanketed as a member my head was on the other side of the wall looking on while I was flying through the air and did not feel any pain whatever and if the members are obliged to feel the suffering of the head it should be obliged to feel the sufferings Dost thou mean to say Sancho said Don Quixote that I did not feel when they were blanketing thee if thou dost thou must not say so or think so for I felt more pain than in spirit than thou didst in body but let us put that aside for the present for we shall have opportunities enough for considering and settling the point tell me Sancho my friend what do they say about me in the village here what do the common people think of me what do the Hidalgos what do the Caballeros what do they say of my valor of my achievements of my courtesy how do they treat the task I have undertaken in reviving and restoring to the world the now forgotten order of chivalry in short Sancho I would have thee tell me all that has come to thine ears on this subject and thou art to tell me without adding anything to the good or taking away anything from the bad for it is the duty of loyal vassals to tell the truth to their lords just as it is and in its proper shape not allowing flattery to add to it any idle deference to lessen it and I would have thee know Sancho that if the naked truth undisguised by flattery came to the ears of princes times would be different and other ages would be reckoned iron ages more than ours which I hold to be the golden of these latter days profit by this advice Sancho and report to me clearly and faithfully the truth of what thou knowest touching what I have demanded of thee that I will do with all my heart master replied Sancho provided your worship will not be vexed at what I say as you wish me to say it out in all its nakedness without putting any more clothes on it than it came to my knowledge in I will not be vexed at all returned Don Quixote thou mayest speak freely and without any beating about the bush well then said he first of all I have to tell you that the common people consider your worship a mighty great madman and me no less a fool the Hidalgos say that not keeping within the bounds of your quality of gentlemen you have assumed the Don and made a knight of yourself at a jump with four twin stocks and a couple of acres of land and never a shirt to your back the Caballeros say they do not want to have Hidalgos setting up in opposition to them particularly squire Hidalgos who polish their own shoes and darn their black stockings with green silk that said Don Quixote does not apply to me for I always go dressed and never patched ragged I may be but ragged more from the wear and tear of arms than of time as to your worship's valor courtesy, accomplishments and task there is a variety of opinions some say mad but droll others valiant but unlucky others courteous but meddling and then they go into such a number of things that they don't leave a whole bone either in your worship or in myself recollect Sancho said Don Quixote that wherever virtue exists in an eminent degree it is persecuted few or none of the famous men that have lived escaped being calumniated by malice Julius Caesar the boldest wisest and bravest of captains was charged with being ambitious and not particularly cleanly in his dress or pure in his morals of Alexander whose deeds won him the name of great they say that he was somewhat of a drunkard of Hercules the name of the many labors it is said that he was lewd and luxurious of Dangelor the brother of Amades of Gaul it was whispered that he was over quarrelsome and of his brother that he was lacrimose so that oh Sancho amongst all these column knees against good men mine may let be pass since they are no more than that's just where it is body of my father is there more than asked Don Quixote there's the tale to be skinned yet said Sancho all so far is cakes and fancy bread but if your worship wants to know all about the column knees they bring against you I will fetch you one this instant who can tell you the whole of them without missing an atom the son of Bartholomew Carrasco who has been studying at Salamanca came home after having been made a bachelor and when I went to welcome him he told me that your worship's history is already abroad in books with the title of the ingenious gentleman Don Quixote of La Mancha and he says they mention me in it by my own name of Sancho and the lady docenia del Tobasco too and diverse things that happen to us when we were alone so that I crossed myself in my wonder how the historian who wrote them down could have known them I promised the Sancho said Don Quixote the author of our history will be some sage and chanter for to such nothing that they choose to write about is hidden what said Sancho a sage and an enchanter why the bachelor Samson Carrasco that is the name of him I spoke of says the author of the history is called Sidi Hamette Peranjena that is a moorish name said Don Quixote may be so replied Sancho for I have heard that the moors are mostly great lovers of Peranjenas thou must have mistaken the surname of this Sidi which means an Arabic lord Sancho observe Don Quixote very likely replied Sancho but if your worship wishes me to fetch the bachelor I will go for him in a twinkling that will do me a great pleasure my friend said Don Quixote for what thou has told me has amazed me and I shall not eat a morsel that will agree with me until I have heard all about it then I am off for him said Sancho and leaving his master he went in quest of the bachelor with whom he returned in a short time and all three together they had a very droll colloquy end of chapter chapter three of the laughable conversation that passed between Don Quixote Sancho Panza and the bachelor Samson Carrasco Don Quixote remained very deep in thought waiting for the bachelor Carrasco from whom he was to hear how he himself had been put into a book as Sancho said and he could not persuade himself that any such history could be in existence for the blood of the enemies he had slain was not yet dry on the blade of his sword and now he had to make out that his mighty achievements were going about in print for all that he fancied some sage either a friend or an enemy might by the aid of magic have given them to the press if a friend in order to magnify and exalt them above the most famous ever achieved by any knight errant if an enemy to bring them to naught and degrade them below the meanest any low squire though as he said to himself the achievements of squires never were recorded if however it were the fact that such a history were in existence it must necessarily being the story of a knight errant be grand eloquent lofty imposing grand and true with this he comforted himself somewhat though it made him uncomfortable to think that the author was a moor judging by the title of and that no truth was to be looked for from moors as they are all imposters cheats and schemers he was afraid he might have dealt with his love affairs in some indecorous fashion that might tend to the discredit and prejudice of the purity of his lady docenia del tobasco he would have had him set forth the fidelity and respect he had always observed toward her spurning queens, empresses and damsels of all sorts and keeping in check the impetuosity of his natural impulses absorbed and wrapped up in these and diverse other cogitations he was found by sancho and carasco whom dunquehote received with great courtesy the bachelor though he was called samson was of no great bodily size but he was a very great wag he was of a sallow complexion but very sharp-witted somewhere about four and twenty years of age with a round face a flat nose and a large mouth all indications of a mischievous disposition and a love of fun and jokes and of this he gave a sample as soon as he saw dunquehote by falling on his knees before him and saying let me kiss your mightiness his hand, senor dunquehote of la lancia for by the habit of saint peter that i wear though i have no more than the first four orders your worship is one of the most famous knights errant that have ever been or will be all the world over a blessing on siri hermet de benin haley who has written the history of your great deeds and a double blessing on that connoisseur who took the trouble of having it translated out of the arabic into our castilian vulgar tongue for the universal entertainment of the people dunquehote made him rise and said so then it is true that there is a history of me and that it was a moor and a sage who wrote it so true it is senor said samson that my belief is there are more than twelve thousand volumes of said history in print this very day only ask portugal borcelona and valencia where they have been printed and moreover there is a report that it is being printed in antwerp and i am persuaded there will not be a country or language in which there will not be a translation of it one of the things here observed dunquehote that ought to give the most pleasure to a virtuous and imminent man is to find himself in his lifetime in print and in type familiar in people's mouths with a good name i say with a good name for if it be the opposite then there is no death to be compared to it if it goes by good name and fame said the bachelor your worship alone bears away the palm from all the knights errant for the moor in his own language and the christian in his taking care to set before us your gallantry your high courage in encountering dangers your fortitude in adversity your patience under misfortunes as well as wounds the purity and continence of the platonic loves of your worship and my lady dona del senilla del tabasco i never heard my lady do senilla called dona observed sancho here nothing more than the lady do senilla del tabasco so here already the history is wrong that is not an objection of any importance replied karasco certainly not said donki hote but tell me senor bachelor what deeds of mine are they that are most made of in this history on that point replied the bachelor opinions differ as tastes do some swear by the adventure of the windmills that your worship took to be brioces and the other said giants others by that of the fulling mills one cries up the description of the two armies that afterwards took the appearance of droves of sheep another that of the dead body on its way to be buried at sygovia a third says the liberation of the galley slaves is the best of all and a fourth that nothing comes up to the affair with the benedictine giants and the battle with the valiant tell me senor bachelor said sancho at this point does the adventure with the yangusans come in when our good rosinante went hankering after dainties the sage has left nothing in the ink bottle replied samson he tells all and sets down everything even to the capers that were the sancho cut in the blanket i cut no capers in the blanket returned sancho in the air i did and more of them than i liked there is no human history in the world i suppose said daint kihoti that has not its ups and downs but more than others such as deal with chivalry for they can never be entirely made up of prosperous adventures for all that replied the bachelor there are those who have read the history who say they would have been glad if the author had left out some of the countless cudgelings that were inflicted on senior daint kihoti in various encounters that's where the truth of the history comes in said sancho at the same time they might fairly have passed them over in silence observed daint kihoti for there is no need of recording events which do not change or affect the truth of the history if they tend to bring the hero of it into contempt death was not in truth and earnest so pious as virgil represents him nor ulysses so wise as homer describes him that is true said samson but it is one thing to write as a poet another to write as a historian the poet may describe or sing things not as they were but as they ought to have been but the historian has to write them down not as they ought to have been but as they were without adding anything to the truth or taking anything from it well then said sancho if this senior moor goes in for telling the truth no doubt among my masters drubbing's minor to be found for they never took the measure of his worship shoulders without doing the same for my whole body but I have no right to wonder if I were to try to forget the thwacks they gave me said sancho my wheels would not let me for they are still fresh on my ribs hush sancho said sancho and don't interrupt the bachelor whom I entreat to go on and tell all the truth but I have no right to wonder if I were to try to forget the thwacks they gave me said sancho whom I entreat to go on and tell all that is said about me in this history and about me said sancho for they say too that I am one of the principal presonages in it personages not presonages friend sancho said samson what another word catcher said sancho if that's to be the way we shall not make an end in a lifetime may god shorten mine sancho returned the bachelor if you are not the second person in the history and there are even some who would rather hear you talk than the cleverest in the whole book though there are some too who say you showed yourself over credulous in believing that there was any possibility in the government of that island offered you by senior don kihote there is still sunshine on that wall said don kihote and when sancho is somewhat more advanced in life with the experience that years bring he will be fitter and better qualified for being a governor than he is at present by god master said sancho the island that I cannot govern with the years I have I will not be able to govern with the years of mthusela the difficulty is that the said island keeps its distance somewhere and not that there is any want of a head in me to govern it leave it to god sancho said don kihote for all will be and perhaps better than you think no leaf on the tree stirs but by god's will that is true said samson and if it be god's will there will not be any want of a thousand islands much less one for sancho to govern I have seen governors in these parts said sancho that are not to be compared to my shoe soul and for all that they are called your lordship and served on silver those are not governors of islands observed samson but of other governments of an easier kind those that govern islands must at least know grammar I could manage the gram well enough said sancho but for the mar I have neither leaning nor liking for I don't know what it is but leaving this matter of the government in god's hands to send me wherever it may be most to his service I may tell you senior bachelor samson carasco it has pleased me beyond measure that the author of this history should have spoken of me in such a way that what is said of me gives no offense for on the faith of a true squire if he had said anything about me that was at all unbecoming an old christian such as I am the death would have heard of it that would be working miracles said samson miracles or no miracles said sancho let everyone mind how he speaks or writes about people and not set down at random the first thing that comes into his head one of the faults they find with this history said the bachelor is that its author inserted it in a novel called the ill-advised curiosity not that it is bad or ill-told but that it is out of place and nothing to do with the history of his worship senior don quixote I will bet the son of a dog has mixed the cabbages and the baskets said sancho then I say said don quixote the author of my history was no sage but some ignorant chatterer in a haphazard and heedless way said about writing it let it turn out as it might just as orbaneja the painter of ubera used to do who when they asked him what he was painting answered what it may turn out sometimes he would paint a cock in such a fashion and so unlike that he had to write alongside of it in gothic letters this is a cock and so it will be with my history commentary to make it intelligible no fear of that returned samson for it is so plain that there is nothing in it to puzzle over the children turn its leaves the young people read it the grown men understand it the old folks praise it in a word it is so thumbed and read and got by heart by people of all sorts that the instant they see any lean hack they say even to reading it are the pages for there is not a lord's anti-chamber where there is not a done kihote to be found one takes it up if another lays it down this one pounces upon it and that one begs for it in short the said history is the most delightful and least injurious entertainment that has been hitherto seen for there is not to be found in the whole of it even the semblance of an immodest word or a thought that is other than catholic to write in any other way said done kihote would not be to write truth but falsehood and historians who have recourse to falsehood ought to be burned like those who coin false money and I know not what could have led the author to have recourse to novels and irrelevant stories when he had so much to write about in mine no doubt he must have gone by verb with straw or with hay etc. for by merely setting forth my thoughts, my size, my tears my lofty purposes my enterprises he might have made of volume as large or larger than all the works of el tostado would make up in fact the conclusion I arrive at senior bachelor is that to write histories or books of any kind there is need of great judgment and a ripe understanding to give expression to humor to write in a strain of graceful pleasantry is the gift of great geniuses the cleverest character in comedy is the clown for he who would make people take him for a fool must not be one history is in a measure a sacred thing for it should be true and where the truth is there God is but not withstanding this there are some who write some books broadcast on the world as if they were fritters there is no book so bad but it has something good in it said the bachelor no doubt of that reply donkey hoaty but it often happens that those who have acquired and attained a well deserved reputation by their writings lose it entirely or damage it in some degree when they give them to the press the reason of that said samson is that as printed works are examined leisurely their faults are easily seen and the greater the fame of the writer the more closely they are scrutinized men famous for their genius great poets illustrious historians are always or most commonly envied by those who take a particular delight and pleasure in criticizing the writings of others without having produced any of their own that is no wonder said Don Quixote for there are many divines who are no good for the pulpit but excellent in detecting the defects or excesses of those who preach all that is true senior Don Quixote said Carrasco but I wish such fault finders were more lenient and less exacting and did not pay so much attention to the spots on the bright sun of the work they grumble at for if ale cuando bonus dormitat Homeras they should remember how long he remained awake to shed the light of his work with as little shade as possible and perhaps it may be that what they find fault with may be moles that sometimes heighten the beauty of the face that bears them and so I say very great is the risk to which he who prints a book exposes himself for of all impossibilities the greatest is to write one that will satisfy and please all readers that which treats of me must have pleased few said Don Quixote quite the contrary said the bachelor for as struttorum infinitum est numerus innumerable are those who have relished the said history but some have brought a charge against the author's memory in as much as he forgot to say if was who stole Sancho's dapple for it is not stated there but only to be inferred from what is set down that he was stolen and a little farther on we see Sancho mounted on the same ass without any reappearance of it they say too that he forgot to state what Sancho did with those hundred crowns that he found in the valice of Sierra Morena as he never alludes to them again and who would be glad to know what he did with them or what he spent them on for it is one of the serious omissions of the work senior samson I am not in a humor now for going into accounts or explanations said Sancho for there is a sinking of the stomach come over me and unless I doctor it with a couple of sups of the old stuff it will put me on the thorn of Santa Lucia at home and my old woman is waiting for me after dinner I will come back and will answer you and all the world every question you may choose to ask as well about the loss of the ass as about the spending of the hundred crowns and without another word or waiting for a reply he made off home Don Quixote begged and entreated the bachelor to stay and do penance with him the bachelor accepted the invitation and remained a couple of young pigeons were added to the ordinary fair at dinner they talked chivalry Carasco fell in with his host's humor the banquet came to an end they took their afternoon sleep Sancho returned and their conversation was resumed End of Chapter 3 Reading by Tisto TYSTO.com Chapter 4 to Chapter 5 of Don Quixote Volume 2 This is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Recording by Glendauer Jones Don Quixote Volume 2 by Miguel de Cervantes Avedre translated by John Ormsby Chapter 4 to Chapter 5 Chapter 4 In which Sancho Panza gives a satisfactory reply to the doubts and questions of the bachelor Samson Carasco together with other matters worth knowing and telling Sancho came back to Don Quixote's house and returning to the late subject of conversation he said to what senior Samson said that he would like to know by whom or how or when my ass was stolen I say in reply that the same night we went into the Sierra Morena flying from the Holy Brotherhood after that unlucky adventure of the galley slaves and the other of the corpse that was going to Segovia my master and I ensconced ourselves in a thicket and after leaning on his lance and I seated on my dapple battered and weary with the late phrase we fell asleep as if it had been on four feather mattresses and I in particular slept so sound that whoever he was he was able to come and prop me upon four stakes which he put under the four corners of the pack saddle and he left me mounted on it and took away dapple from under me without my feeling it that's an easy matter said Don Quixote and it is no new occurrence for the same thing happened to Sacrepante at the Siege of Alblaca the famous thief Brunello by the same contrivance took his horse from between his legs day came continued Sancho and the moment I stirred the stakes gave way and I fell to the ground with a mighty come down I looked about for the ass but could not see him the tears rushed to my eyes and I raised such a lamentation that if the author of our history has not put it in he may depend upon it for a good thing some days after I know not how many travelling with her ladyship the princess I saw my ass and mounted on him in the dress of a gypsy was that the great rogue and rascal that my master and I freed from the chain that is not where the mistake is replied Samson the author speaks of Sancho as being mounted on it I don't know what to say to that Sitzancho unless the historian made a mistake or perhaps it might be a blunder of the printers no doubt that's it but what became of the 100 crowns did they vanish to which Sancho answered I spent them for my own good and my wives and my children's and it is they that have made my wife bear so patiently all my wanderings on highways and byways in the service of my master Don Quixote for if after all this time I had come back to the house without a wrap and without the ass it would have been a poor look out for me and if anyone wants to know anything more about me here I am ready to answer the king himself in person and it is no warfare of anyone's whether I took or did not take whether I spent or did not spend for the wax that were given me in these journeys were to be paid for in money even if they were valued at no more than four Maraveddes apis another 100 crowns would not pay me for half of them let each look to himself and not try to make out white black and black and white for each of us is as God made him I and often worse I will take care said Carasco to impress upon the author of the history that if he prints it again he must not forget what worthy Sancho has said for it will raise it a good span higher is there anything else to correct in the history sain your bachelor as Don Quixote no doubt there is he replied something that will be of the same importance as those I have mentioned does the author promise a second part at all said Don Quixote he does promise one replied Samson but he says he has not found it nor does he know who has got it and we cannot say whether it will appear or not and so on that hit as some say that no second part has ever been good and others that enough has already been written by Don Quixote it is thought that there will be no second part though some who are jovial rather than Saturn I say let us have more Quixote days let Don Quixote charge and Sancho Chata and no matter what it may turn out we shall be satisfied with that and what does the author mean to do said Don Quixote what replied Samson I as soon as he has found the mystery which he is now searching for with extraordinary diligence he will at once give it to the press moved more by the prophet that may agree to him from doing so than by any thought of praise where at Sancho observed the author looks for money and profit does he it will be a wonder if he succeeds for it will be only hurry hurry with him like the tailor on Easter Eve and works done in a hurry are never finished as perfectly as they ought to be let master more or whatever he is pay attention to what he is doing and I and my master will give him as much grouting ready to his hand in the way of adventures and accidents of all sorts as would make up not only one second part but a hundred the good man fancies no doubt that we are fast asleep in the straw here but let him hold up our feet to be shot and he will see all I say is that if my master would take my advice we would be now a field redressing out rages and writing wrongs as is the use and custom of good nights errant Sancho had hardly uttered these words when the Naeng of Rossanante fell upon their ears which Naeng Don Quixote accepted as a happy omen and he resolved to make another sally three or four days from that time announcing his intention to the bachelor he asked his advice as to the quarter in which he ought to commence his expedition and the bachelor replied that in his opinion he ought to go to the kingdom of Aragon and the city of Saragossa where there were to be certain solemn justings at the festival as St George at which he might win now and above all the knights of Aragon which would be winning it at the expense of the world he commended his very praise worthy and gallant resolution but admonished him to proceed with greater caution in encountering dangers because his life did not belong to him but to all those who had need of him to protect and aid them in their misfortunes there's where it is what I abominate senior Samson said Sancho here my master will attack a hundred armed men as a greedy boy would half a dozen melons body of the worlds in your bachelor there is a time to attack and a time to retreat and it is not always San Diego and closed Spain moreover I've heard it said and I think my master himself if I remember rightly that the mean of valor lies between the extremes of cowardice and rashness and if that be so I don't want him to fly without having good reason or to attack when the odds make it better not but above all things I warn my master that if he is to take me with him it must be on a condition that he is to do all the fighting and that I am not to be called upon to do anything except what concerns keeping him clean and comfortable in this I will dance a tenets on him readily but to expect me to draw sword even against rascally churls of the hatchet and hood is idle I don't sit up to be a fighting man senior samson but only the best and most loyal squire that ever served knight errant and if my master don't kick saute in consideration of many faithful services is pleased to give me some island of the many this worship says one may stumble on in these parts I will take it as a great favour and if he does not give it to me I was born like everyone else and a man must not live in dependence on anyone except God and what is more my bread will taste as well and perhaps even better without a government than if I were a governor and how do I know but that in these governments I have a trip for me to make me lose my footing and fall and knock my grinders out Sancho I was born and Sancho I mean to die but for all that if heaven were to make me a fair offer of an island or something else of the kind without much trouble without much risk I'm not such a fool as to refuse it for they say too when they offer the a heifer and when good luck comes to thee take it in brother Sancho said Kerasko you have spoken like a professor but for all that put your trust in God and in Senor Don Quixote for he will give you a kingdom not to say an island it's all the same be it more or be it less though I can tell you Senor Kerasko that my master would not throw the kingdom into a sack all in halls for I have felt my own pulse and I find myself sound enough to rule kingdoms and govern islands and I have before now told my master as much take care Sancho said Sampson honors change manners and perhaps when you find yourself a governor you won't know the mother that bore you that may hold good for those that are born in the ditches said Sancho not for those who have the fact of an old Christian four fingers deep on their souls as I have nay only look at my disposition is that likely to showing gratitude to anyone God grant it said Don Quixote we shall see when the government comes and I seem to see it already he then begged the bachelor if he were a poet to do in the favor of composing some verses for him conveying the farewell he meant to take of his lady Dulcinea Delta Bozo and to see that a letter of her name was placed at the beginning of each line so that at the end of the verses Dulcinea Delta Bozo might be read by putting together the first letters the bachelor replied that although he was not one of the famous poets of Spain they said only three and a half he would not fail to compose the required verses though he saw a great difficulty in the task as the letters which made up the name was 17 so if he made four ballad stanzas of four lines each there would be a letter over and if he made them of five what they call decimals or broadondolas they were three letters short nevertheless he would try to drop her a letter as well as he could so that the name Dulcinea Delta Bozo might be got into four ballad stanzas it must be by some means or other said Don Quixote for unless the name stands there plain and manifest no one would believe the verses were made for her they agreed upon this and that the departure should take place in three days from that time Don Quixote charged the bachelor to keep it a secret especially from the curate and master Nicholas and from his niece and the housekeeper lest they should prevent the execution of his praiseworthy and valiant purpose Carrasco promised all and then took his leave charging Don Quixote to inform him of his good evil fortunes whenever he had an opportunity and thus they bad each other farewell and Sancho went away to make the necessary preparations for their expedition Chapter 5 of the shrewd and droll conversation that passed between Sancho Panza and his wife Teresa Panza was worthy of being duly recorded the translator of this history when he comes to write this fifth chapter says that he considers it apocryphal because in it Sancho Panza speaks in a style unlike that which might have been expected from his limited intelligence and says things so subtle that he does not think it possible he could have conceived them however desirous of doing what his task would have done him he was unwilling to leave it untranslated and therefore he went on to say Sancho came home in such glee and spirits that his wife noticed his happiness a bow shot off so much so that it made her ask him what have you got Sancho friend that you are so glad to which he replied wife if it were God's will I should be very glad pleased as I show myself I don't understand you husband Sici and I don't know what you mean by saying you would be glad if it were God's will not to be well pleased for fool as I am I don't know how one can find pleasure in not having it haki Teresa replied Sancho I am glad because I have made up my mind to go back to the service Soté who means to go out a third time to seek for adventures and I am going with him again for my necessities will have it so and also the hope that cheers me with the thought that I may find another hundred crowns like those we have spent though it makes me sad to leave thee and the children and if God would be pleased to let me have my daily bread dry shot and at home bring me out into the byways and crossroads and he could do it at small cost by merely willing it it is clear my happiness would be more solid and lasting for the happiness I have is mingled with the sorrow at leaving thee so that I was right in saying I would be glad if it were God's will not to be well pleased look here Sancho said Teresa ever since you joined on to a knight errant you talk in such a roundabout way that there is no understanding you it's enough that God understands me wife replied Sancho for he is the understander of all things that will do but mind sister you must look to dapple carefully for the next three days so that he may be fit to take arms double his feet and see to the pack saddle not to a wedding we are bound but to go round the world and to play it give and take with giants and dragons and monsters and hear hissing and roaring and bellowing and howling and even all this would be lavender if we had not to reckoned with young goosens and enchanted moors I know well enough husband said Teresa that squires errant don't eat their bread for nothing and so I will be always praying to our Lord to deliver you speedily from all that hard fortune I can tell you wife said Sancho if I did not expect to see myself governor of an island before long I would drop down dead on the spot nay then husband said Teresa let the hen live though it be with her pip live and let the devil take all the governments in the world you came out of your mother's womb without a government you have lived until now without a government and when it is God's will you will go or be carried to your grave without a government how many there are in the world who live without a government and continue to live all the same and I reckoned in the number of the people the best source in the world is hunger and as the poor are never without that they always eat with a relish but mine Sancho if by good luck you should find yourself with some government don't forget me and your children remember that Sanchiko is now full fifteen and it is right he should go to school if his uncle the abbot has a mind to have him trained for the church consider too that your daughter Marie Sancho will not die of grief if we marry her for I have my suspicions that she is as eager to get her husband as you to get a government and after all a daughter looks better ill married than well hoard by my faith replied Sancho if God brings me to get any sort of government I intend wife to make such a high mash for Marie Sancho that there will be no approaching her without calling her my lady Marie Sancho returned Teresa marry her to her equal that is the safest plan for if you put her out of wooden clogs into high heeled shoes out of her grey flannel petticoat into hoops and silk gowns out of the plain marica and thou into dona so and so and my lady the girl won't know where she is there are a thousand blunders that will show the thread of her course home spun stuff tut you fool said Sancho it will be only to practice it for two or three years and then dignity and decorum will fit her as easily as a glove and if not what matter let her be my lady and never mind what happens keep to your own station Sancho Teresa don't try to raise yourself higher and bear in mind the proverb that says wipe the nose of your neighbour's son and take him into your house a fine thing it would be indeed to marry our Maria to some great count or grand gentleman who when the humour took him would abuse her and call her clown bread and Claude Hopper's daughter and spinning wench I have not been bringing up my daughter for all this time I can tell you but do you bring home money Sancho and leave marrying her to my care there is Lope Torcho one Torcho's son a stout sturdy young fellow that we know and I can see he does not look sour at the girl and with him one of our own sort she will be well married and we shall have her always under our eyes and be all one family parents and children and sons-in-law and the peace and blessing of God will dwell among us so don't you go marrying her in those courts and grand palaces where they won't know what to make of her or she what to make of herself why you idiot and wife of the rabbit said Sancho what do you mean by trying without why or where for to keep me from marrying my daughter who will give me grandchildren that will be called your lordship looky Teresa I have always heard my elders say that he who does not know how to take advantage of luck when it comes to him has no right to complain if it gives him the go-by and now that is a knocking at our door it will not do to shut it out let us go with the favouring breeze that blows upon us it is this sort of talk and what Sancho says lowered down that made the translator of the history say he considered this chapter apocryphal don't you see you animal continued Sancho that it will be well for me to drop into some profitable government that will lift us out of the mire and marry Marie Sancho to whom I like and you yourself will find yourself called Donna Teresa Panza and sitting in church with fine carpet and cushions and draperies in spite and in defiance of all the born ladies of the town no stay as you are growing neither greater nor less like a tapestry figure let us say no more about it for Sancho shall be a countess say what you will are you sure of all that you say husband replied Teresa well for all that I am afraid this rank of countess for my daughter will be her ruin you do as you like make a duchess or a princess of her but I can tell you it will not be with my willing consent I was always a lover of equality brother and I can't bear to see people give themselves heirs without any right they called me to research at my baptism a plain, simple name without any additions or tags or fringes of dons or donas Casajo was my father's name and as I am your wife I am called Teresa Panza though by right I ought to be called Teresa Casajo but kings go where laws like and I am content with this name without having the don put on top of it to make it so heavy that I cannot carry it and I don't want to make people talk about me when they see me go dressed like a countess or a governor's wife for they will say it once see what heirs the slut gives herself only yesterday she was always spinning flags and used to go to mass with the tail of her petticoat over her head instead of a mantle and there she goes today in a hooped gown with her brooches and heirs as if we didn't know her if God keeps me in my seven senses or five or whatever number I have I am not going to bring myself to such a path go you brother and be a government or an island man and swagger as much as you like for by the soul of my mother neither my daughter nor I are going to stir a step from our village a respectable woman should have a broken leg and keep it home and to be busy at something is a virtuous damsel's holiday to your adventures along with your Don Quixote and leave us to our misadventures for God will mend them for us according as we deserve it I don't know I'm sure who fixed the Don to him what neither his father nor grandfather had I declare thou hast a devil of some sort in thy body said Sancho God help thee what a lot of things thou has strung together one after the other without head or tail what have Casacho and the brooches and the proverbs and the heirs to do with what I say look here fool and dolt for so I may call you when you don't understand my words and run away from good fortune if I had said that my daughter was to throw herself down from a tower or go roaming the world as the Infanta Donna Raca wanted to do you would write in not giving way to my will but if in an instant in less than a twinkling of an eye I put the Don and my lady on her back and take her out of the stubble and place her under a canopy on a dais on a couch with more velvet cushions and all the old mojades of Marocca ever had in their family why won't you consent with my wishes do you know why husband? because of the proverb that says who covers the discovers the at the poor man people only throw a hasty glance on the rich man they fix their eyes and if the said rich man was once on a time poor it is then there is the sneering and the subtle and spite of back biters and in the streets here they swarm as thick as bees look here Teresa said Sancho and listen to what I am now going to say to you and maybe you never heard it in all your life and I do not give my own notions for what I am about to say are the opinions of his reverence the preacher who preached in this town last length and who said if I remember rightly that all things present that our eyes behold bring themselves before us and remain and fix themselves on our memory much better and more forcibly than things past these observations which Sancho makes here are the other ones on account of which the translator says he regards this chapter as apocryphal in as much as they are in Sancho's capacity when it arises he continued that when we see any person well dressed and making a figure with rich garments and retinue of servants it seems to lead and impel us perforce to respect him though memory may at the same time recall to us some lowly condition in which we have seen him but which whether it may have been poverty or low birth or a thing of the past has no existence while the only thing that has any existence is what we see before us and if this person whom fortune has raised from his original lowly state these were the very words the Padre used to his present height of prosperity be well bred generous, courteous to all without seeking to vie with those whose nobility is of ancient date depend upon it Teresa no one will remember what he was and everyone will respect what he is except indeed the enliest from whom no fair fortune is safe I do not understand you husband replied Teresa do as you like and don't break my head with any more specifying and rhetoric and if you have revolved to do what you say resolved you should say well done, said Sancho not revolved don't set yourself to wrangle with me husband said Teresa I speak as God pleases and don't deal in out of the way phrases and I say if you are bent upon having a government take your son Sancho with you and teach him from this time on how to hold a government for sons ought to inherit and learn the trades of their fathers as soon as I have the government Sancho I will send for him by post and I will send the money of which I shall have no lack for there is never any want of people to lend it to governors when they have not got it and do thou dress him so as to hide what he is and make him look what he is to be you send the money said Teresa and I'll dress him up for you as fine as you please then we are agreed that our daughter is to be a countess Sancho the day I see her a countess replied Teresa it will be the same to me as if I was burying her but once more I say do as you please for we women are born to this burden of being obedient to our husbands though they be dogs and with this she began to weep in earnest as if she already saw her dead and buried Sancho consulted by saying that though he must make her a countess he would put it off as long as possible here their conversation came to an end and Sancho went back to see Don Quixote and make arrangements for their departure End of Chapter 4 to Chapter 5