 Yeah, good morning everyone. Good morning. So this is a four-part series on I'm married a mystic as part of our Awaken The Heart Monday morning show and yeah it's such a delight that David's here this morning so it's like the two main characters from the book. Martin and Persa are back. On the couch. They're back on the couch, right? Yeah. So I don't know how much or if I'll even read out of the book this morning but a few more have come on. There's Loose has just joined us probably from Mexico but I can show everyone an alien virtual there. Here's here's the cover. This is like a draft copy of the book and it's very exciting. It's being printed this month and yeah the official book launch is next month. So it's like but now it feels really good to just share about it and just go into the themes of it. Yeah, yeah. This is the buzz. We're right in the middle of the buzz before the book. So yeah I think I'll just share a little bit about the book and then we'll just go with the flow and see where it takes us. Yeah. But this a lot of what is in the book is actually the journals that I wrote. When I first joined David and was sort of launched out of New Zealand to come over and be based in America and and just dive into this devotional life. Someone asked before what is a mystic? Well really a mystic is one who's devoted to God and just has this desire to to live in the experience of the spirit and that is the the most important thing you know on your heart and becomes your your sole purpose for living and and so I had felt this very strong call and had a very strong revelatory experience where I encountered the love of God and in that moment I knew that this presence of love and this presence of God was there for the first time in my life. I didn't I didn't have a religious upbringing and I didn't have the emotional just talking about it because yeah it's like I didn't really have a path I'd started doing a lot of inner forgiveness work but that one encounter just was so powerful because it was a direct experience that God is real and this presence of love is right here aware and all I knew from that moment on that if I give gave my life over to wanting to be in touch with this presence and wanting to be guided by the Holy Spirit I would be shown I'd be shown everything and I would be told everything where I need to go who I need to be with and I and from that moment on it was very quick Jesus appeared to me in a meditation and said I'll be your guide that was a surprise a beautiful surprise and he told me within a week to move from where I was living and go up north and move in with my parents and Jackie was my mother was a course of miracle student so she put the book in front of me and I just listened I was just in this practice of listening once I knew that I could listen no inwardly rather than just be bouncing around off my own decisions I listened and I felt yes this is definitely your path and within six months of studying the course every day was just a prayer really it felt like the ink was wet on on the page like Jesus had written it for me the night before and I would wake up and read my lesson and every day was this experience of seeing what Jesus was going to bring me and how the day was going to unfold to show me what I needed to see and and help me understand the lesson of the day and then six months later I was feeling pretty healed and and Kirsten thought she would just head back off down to the South Island and live happily ever after in the town of Wanaka go skiing and hang out in the organic coffee shop and Jesus had other plans we have those fantasies Susanna had a fantasy of sitting by the river and meditating her way into God and you had a Wanaka fantasy I did it was strong you probably seen Lord of the Rings it's that area where it was filmed so but the world calls breathtakingly beautiful mm-hmm and so Jackie and her course miracles friend Mia they'd been studying the course for two years by that point and they had gone as far as they could with their study group and so they started looking online for someone who was living the course and could inspire them to take it deeper into the practical application and they found David online and so they wrote to David and asked if he would come to New Zealand and he said yes and so David flew down and and that was it basically once the spirit just told me and all of this kind of story is in the book of how the Holy Spirit spoke to me through all these people at this weekend retreat and said oh you're going to a peacehouse with David no the next person came up to me I heard you're going to America with David no and the third person came up to me at this weekend retreat oh I heard that you're going to the peacehouse with David I said well I'm open the fourth person came and I said yeah I think I am and by the time the fifth person basically told me I was going to America I said yes I'd better go and talk to David about this yeah that was the first time I've been in that part of the world even I'd never been even near close to Australia New Zealand so it was Jackie's close friend Mia's her husband Lars the Swedish name it's who sweets down there who put the ticket on his credit card and reminded me of that when I started talking about divine providence how I lived in divine providence he said well it's on my credit card so it's practical this is very practical it seems to happen in form but you just start to attribute everything to spirit like the Holy Spirit and Jesus instead of the linear causation yeah yeah I mean you're really just turning into that voice and you just pull it you know you pull it through everyone and realize that it is spirit that's guiding you so yeah the book really these once I we started traveling together and going on all of these adventures and I was journaling every morning it was a very devotional practice of first thing just going straight for the couch and opening my course book saying good morning Holy Spirit and reading my lesson I was still going through the lessons for the first time then and then just opening my mind to pray and communicate and ask questions and for me when I first read in the course you know basically God's voice speaks to you all through the day I just took that to be the absolute truth and so I expected to hear God's voice speaking to me all through the day I didn't I just trusted Jesus 100% so of course that would be the fact and so I just expected to hear the answers and I did so I would write and just have the pen and expect his answers to flow through the pen and they did so a lot of the journals are a part of the book and then we were going on all of these adventures and then what was really amazing is ten years later a number of people had said to me you need you need to write a book you need to put these journals out into a book because they go through this kind of three-year process of at the beginning going wow what is happening and then asking all of these questions right through to the end where there aren't any questions left and there's this consistent awareness of the Holy Spirit in mind and so as you go through reading them it's like being taken on this transformational journey and so ten years later that the moment came and I heard it's time to to write it and then what was amazing is we've just been on a big tour in Europe and then Ricky was had been touring and she heard she was going to write a book and so she sent this message out saying I'm hearing to write a book but I I don't have a book of my own to write right now what does it mean so I wrote to her and said oh do you think it could be my book you're gonna help write and she's oh my god that's it yes I definitely feel inspired so ten years later to the day I found myself back at the Peace House in Cincinnati sitting at the same desk where I would type up these journals and send them out on the mailing list to share them and I was sitting there at the same desk then writing the rest of the story for it to be put in a book and ten years later of course I'm writing it from this perspective of of humor like oh my god look at what I was going through at the time and feeling so much gratitude you know for now being able to see it see the love even more fully that was there for me that at the time I was just going through it going wow no to relive it through the journals yeah yeah it's amazing how you come when you hear a piece of music or you read a poem or you read a journal it you're just right back in that same feeling and it's like it's it's nothing you haven't gone anywhere it's just an amazing experience yeah this book too is kind of like some of you may have followed along with us for years but back in the really in the early 1980s Robert and Barbara Varley were traveling around the United States sharing and extending a course of miracles and that little book was such an impact on for me and for you and so this is more of an expanded version this was they were very devoted course students I'd say more like course pioneers as far as actually applying the teachings to opening to guidance listening and following very much like you said where you were told you know you you ask and you shall hear and you expected it so did Barbara and Robert was right in there with her you know the whole story so when I look at the thickness of this book it's that was more of the spirit using their story you know as an assignment to write it out because they weren't used to writing books and writing anything and also it's like a more of an introductory starter to living a very devoted life whereas this really takes I think the reader from the intro which is which is great you need a book that can start where people can relate to it and really zooms it I think a little further towards mysticism and so it's quite just no ordinary book I have a feeling this the spirit will use this in many many many ways and it will become kind of a classic for going from the deep teachings metaphysical teachings and into the experience of what it's all about so it's very experiential yeah it's kind of like an angel bath in terms with words it's gonna be fun yeah it is it's I think it's like a if you were gonna call it something like a movie no it's like a comedy drama a little bit of thriller a little bit of romance it's got it's got everything in it because it's really going through like through the darkness to the light so it's very transparent it's no if you want to know how to expose private thoughts like I was just learning as I was going because I I realized that if I had some judgmental thoughts in my mind and I was in holy relationship with David and the purpose of holy relationship is to be joined in this intimate experience of mind where there's total trust and oneness and agreement and you're so close that there's nothing between you there's no veil between you and if I started to have some private thoughts that I was holding back I noticed that I would start to feel separate from David and the longer I left them the bigger the golf would get and and then I I had no choice but to share those thoughts and and through the sharing of them was met with innocence and again they just would drop and be back in this experience of intimacy of mind and innocence and so it's really is a how to guide of the living experience of walking through it no private thoughts no people placing if you have that how to question like how do you do that really can I hear it one more time well there there it is and it's it's practical but also I think it will take on a life of its own you know how they say that with with different things like books or songs they kind of take off and travel like a feather in the wind you know like amazing experience but what I'm seeing too is even with this book now that it's just you know being printed or it will be soon coming to print but Jeffrey's here there's talk of an audiobook there's a buzz around here about an audiobook and then yesterday there was talk of Deanna was talking about the screenplay and our friend Bruce out in California who was a screenwriter for Ghosts and Time Traveller's wife turning it into a movie you know it's amazing the book hasn't been printed yet and already there's audiobook and now talk of that and so my suggestion was Diva Primal if you know Diva Primal was should play Kirsten in the book although she's an amazing singer I don't know about that and then they were saying what was for me was Patrick Stewart they reminded Deanna that Patrick Stewart's about 70 years old now and have to play me when I was in my 40 43 or something and then they said makeup lots of makeup like they said so we're having a lot of fun with it it's like it does seem to have a life of its own and it's it's going into orbit but we're here just this is like the launch point before all that begins so it's kind of fun yeah it is really fun and I've kept hearing to go out and and talk about the course and the practical application of course and it's really quite amazing because I even it's in the everything but there was one moment where I had all of this resistance coming up and feeling really stretched and and I was journaling with the Holy Spirit and I wrote well it's okay for David he's a talking mystic he's found his calling no he's in the flow he knows what he's doing and he does it so well and and I'm not a talking mystic you know that's not my path I just want to pray and meditate and dance and sit by the lake in Monica Monica there was a very strong fantasy a meditating bite in Monica that was very strong and in that moment the Holy Spirit said to me well just relax you know you don't have to talk you can just just relax and you know what are you really afraid of and then took me much deeper in that moment into what it was that I was actually afraid of but the last you know since the writing of this the last 10 years you know our focus is not about be it's never been about being a formal teacher or even being a course of miracles teacher for me it's always been this desire to know God and to be with God and to continue to open up to to this experience ever deeper in my mind and then it might look like these have been a lot of teaching and speaking and holding retreats and holding gatherings but they're really just the backdrop for this relationship with the Holy Spirit and and deepening and the experience for myself but it's interesting now that this is this books being printed I'm hearing from from Jesus that I am to pick up the course again because I I put the book down for a few years I didn't feel the call to be reading the words anymore and I'm hearing really clearly to go out and to speak about the course and to speak about the practical application and when it comes to these book gatherings I've just been connecting with Ricky who's been out touring with Eric and already there's just all of these invitations coming in to go over to the East Coast and hold book gatherings you know unity churches or gatherings like this but to bring the book and make it available and and speak about it and I keep hearing that they're big gatherings you know they're bigger and that just feels like some kind of tone that's being set for it like it's it's meant to go out now the support for the practical application think of the course is that's what the call is now and and I'm just getting this nudge from Jesus to go and meet that call so it feels really inspiring because until now it's like well I'll just go if it's to meet with one person and then if there's a few more who come together for the gathering wonderful and yet this feels like a different vibe almost no go to a unity church there's 75 people there this is the call you know it's like an entry point in some ways into the how what does it mean to forgive that question comes up so much like how and you can read you know all these 12-step process 9-step process 15-step process to forgive but this journey is experiential it's it's forgiving is is in the moment actually being with what it is that's arising and seeing how this personality self is reacting or responding or believing in something that's not purely loving yeah it's like a ripple effect of because I think of all the years that I've traveled around the United States and Canada in the 1990s which is yeah it's stuck a couple decades ago or even more but I did go to a lot of unity churches and they seem to be very welcoming it's interesting now we've just got a book of ours it's gone to like divorce publishing and and they're starting to distribute it to a lot of unity churches so it's all kind of like just letting the the raindrops sprinkle miracles fall like healing rain and the dry and thirsty desert and signs of life spring up everywhere and I think you know those that idea comes from the course and that's what's happening now and and this inner journey is nothing like you've ever experienced before at all it's it's really an adventure it takes a lot of faith of courage of willingness persistence and yet the Spirit is so graciously provided with so many symbols about travel symbols relationship symbols movie symbols music symbols they're just floods of symbols that really help us and we're both what walking testimonies to when you just allow the spirit to use all the symbols without any kind of holding back then it makes it for a rapid experience of of experiencing union with God and connection to God and mystical experiences you know we both you know we use the term mystics but we've had quite a lot of mystical experiences along the way they were never the goal they're more like the byproduct of the devotion where you just transported you know into the realm of unity and oneness and and actually revelatory experiences we even beyond this world beyond perception entirely so I find that everybody's always asking for the practical and that's really been our journey is that it's not been a path of huge long hours of days and weeks of meditation we've had our stretches in hermitages no doubt and we've had these deep experiences that seem to be given as well but majority of it has been using relationships and using our our interactions with with our fellow human beings as a as a backdrop for mind training and it's it's great that it's it was journaled so thoroughly and put out on our awakening in Christ's list is probably still archived there on our awakening Christ yahoo group some of these messages so you can go back to actually when they were coming out and sometimes we would occasionally we get reactions and there'd be many questions coming in so it was very interactive that way too it wasn't just journaling it was traveling and the journaling and the interactive thing with people coming in and then about a decade later now it's it's kind of coming to life it's getting its second wind in a much broader way where I think it can reach a lot of people which is just symbolic again because it's really just one mind but we have to just trust and and be used by the Spirit in ways where we listen and follow and that's our pathway back to God is listening and follow and so many miracles have come from just our simple willingness to do that like floodgate got opened up unbelievable that's been amazing yeah it's just like the starting with one like my I prayed for to go home and to know a love that couldn't come to an end those were the prayers of my heart like when I first started with the course and and then I heard about holy relationship just briefly I hadn't got that far in the course book yet to really know what holy relationship was I don't think anyone can really know until you have the experience of it but yeah I just prayed very that was what I wanted I wanted to go home and even in a country like New Zealand everyone would think wow you know I could be at home in New Zealand that would be so easy to live there and so beautiful it's like no it's really not in this world no matter where I lived even in New Zealand it wasn't it I would start to feel unsettled again or like I didn't have all the pieces together something was always missing or someone was missing and so I was open to holy relationship and then I started joining with David and in this purpose because really holy relationship is a purpose and it it unifies it unifies your mind in this experience of prayer and action all together at the same time and what I found myself feeling was that I was at home I was at home in this purpose and at home in this function of serving God and at home in this relationship of fully accepting 100% that this is what has given me by God for my relationship with God now and yeah and those prayers are answered and holy relationship it's safe to start with one and then what I found happened is this trust and this purpose of seeing innocence and and going for the Christ and practicing with seeing that everything that arose in my mind in that said something other than David is the Christ I am innocent was there for healing and then of course that transferred to being in that same purpose of holy relationship with others to the point now where I feel the same purpose is with all of my brothers is transferred to to everyone so really no one is outside of this relationship of holy relationship it's it's a purpose it's really a purpose it's my relationship with God and yet these relationships that where we get to see where there's fear of intimacy wanting to hold back wanting to protect or just outright projection of beliefs that are in the mind that they have to come up to be seen and and so within this context it's it's like a shared agreement that we have like yeah let's bring it to the light we have to bring it to the light like if anything starts is how back or hidden within our mind and it literally pulls us away from one another and our trust with the spirit and so this whole purpose and practice of holy relationship is literally a development of trust it is a development of trust with the spirit and and as we keep taking each step with it our relationship and trust with the spirit gets stronger and stronger and stronger and that veil of mistrust just gets thinner and thinner until in the end you can't even believe it if if there's some thought that comes it's like oh that must be what's going on what's going on in my mind it's it gets as quick as a blink drop it again yeah people really need to relate to something for for the Holy Spirit to use it as a symbol so in terms of relationships I mean relationships in this world on the linear timeline are are interpersonal that's that's what they're called in fact miracles have to come through you might say at the realm of of interpersonal perception because if it was higher than interpersonal perception there would be no need for bodies at all if you if you or mind was ready for spiritual vision for going into these mystical experiences and going into revelation there'd be no need for forgiveness literally revelation transcends the need for forgiveness it's literally what is you know byron katie wall we talked about loving what is and and what is revelation and light light and love and joy is what is so these interpersonal relationships are just symbols of the mind that's it's got distorted perception and basically needs help needs a lot of help to attain the spiritual eye the Christ vision and so if we look back at history just throughout history you know I think I think of some of Dan Brown's books you know because Mary Magdala is is a fascinating figure in history it was only recently I think it was only probably a couple weeks ago when I was telling everybody that the Pope flies around and he was up in his plane and and basically the Catholic Church the Pope came out and said listen this whole thing about Mary Magdala being a prostitute is not not real now it's come a whole the way the 2016 is the days of Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump and the Pope is saying the Catholic Church is saying Mary Magdala wasn't a prostitute it's like okay we got that corrected so first you have a relationship that was quite fascinating over 2,000 years ago between Mary Magdala and Jesus and there's some interesting parallels and then we mentioned the Varley book which is quite interesting some of you are familiar with disappearance of the universe to art in person there's crude and rude Gary who's coming in to try to open up with these kind teachers who are very loving and humorous and joking with him but basically art in person there's another interesting pair throughout history more current through Gary Renard's notes and so forth and visitations but but basically what you have is this desire to go for self-realization and enlightenment beyond the personal and that's really what the course is I would say when you get into those chapters from you know around 18 chapter 18 to chapter 24 transforming special relationships in the holy relationship even in there Jesus is he's got a section called the healed relationship and he's describing it as two people in that section so so Jesus is very practical he's channeled the Course in Miracles through Helen and Bill's help and now we've got it in published version and basically it's a fast track I always say silence and relationships and a combination of the two is the fast track to God the ego doesn't like silence and the ego doesn't like the Holy Spirit's use of relationships that's like that's spelling the end of the experience of this ego in a rapid way so it's not surprising that if the course is your calling is your path that that these are the symbols that will be used you know and that's how it's gone for us we've had hermitages we've had relationships travel even now you know I'm getting ready to launch on a world tour in several days Kirsten's feeling tours coming in East Coast and maybe something out here at the West Coast United States both of us are quite open and spontaneous so we don't even know always who's gonna be traveling with us I think Francis will be with me for a time we know and Ricky and and yet we're kind of like peace program you know she walked around but people would join her for a while on the road and walk with her and then they go okay that's this isn't my calling but it has been been a lot of fun so you know it's interchangeable parts you have people that that come in and we've had that over the years too so it's a glorious experience it's just an amazing experience it's very authentic it's very radical to the ego I think there will be people that will read the book I'm married a mystic and we'll go whoa I need to digest this like for you taking down the journals it was oh whoa digest this one and whoa digest this one it was a lot one step at a time and I feel that's what's gonna happen with this book people are not gonna pick it up necessarily like you read a novel although I was talking to my friend Maria Felipe Reverend Felipe and I think you sent her a copy and she just chapter she said it was she used the word riveting she said you know it's like riveting I couldn't my eyes were glued on to it and I had to keep reading and reading just from the chapter because it like she said it just took me in and then it just I couldn't put it down some people have had that experience with the course too where they they it comes into their life and they can't put it down it's just like it's God speaking to them and they're so thrilled and so happy that this is so it rings so true and resonates so well and most have the resistances I have a feeling people will have resistances too and it's not like there's been any major publishers not that we haven't shopped it around a little bit but it's like they're there I would say most major publishers wouldn't touch this book with a 10-foot fishing pole they probably maybe 2,000 yards away they could view it you know like okay be careful there's something out there that could rock your world if you do it but I do have a feeling that that's going to be part of it and yet for those that really are drawn to it and hang with it I think it's going to be like totally life-changing come blow your socks off like knock your socks off which is which is what we've prayed for over the years the barley book not my socks off I memorized the book I mean I recorded it as an audio book because it wasn't in print and then I played it over and over and back in the days this shows you how it dates my early travels cassettes I recorded it onto a cassette recorder and played it and the young people are going what are cassettes that's from an ancient time different era so it's exciting it's very exciting see those sparklies yeah they're feeling this will it'll go on and on audio book translated into other languages and maybe even a movie because it's that it's that impactful it really is it's just it's it's a direct real real life you know in real time written at the time of the journals of going through it and so those who have read through it just help with proofreading have had very deep healing experiences and found themselves on the floor or in mystical experiences and you know that's what happened when some first started even tea you know I just found themselves by whoa you know because I think this that's all we can extend is the direct experience of what you know what what it is what this relationship of undoing the ego is and and that's there's such a desire to share that and extend that to keep staying with the experience for itself and to give it away and just know how how helpful it is and yeah I just love it I read it every morning in Mexico as part of the final proofreading with the community and and every morning we just come and be in prayer and I read and I could only read half a chapter at the most a chapter because there's so much content in each chapter like whoa you know when you've like filled up the bathtub with water and you've got to the top of the bathtub that's it it's full you can't you can't put any more water in it it's time to just get in and soak in the warmth of it and very much like the courses you know when you you just read it that morning and it's like well how did he know how did he know that's what I need to read and and it's the same with the book everyone who was there that morning going oh this was my question or this is exactly what I'm going through so I feel this just knowing this it's one shade awakening and this one shade healing and when there's something that's to be extended like this it's the perfect answer to the prayer that and we're all just here receiving the prayer together very grateful broadcasting on Periscope and people are touching their screen and that's what's so fun about this like it it's the backdrop of you know of publishing a book this is just the draft copy of course no and it looks like you know being an author and publishing a book but we all know it's not about publishing a book no it's not about about any of what it looks like it's about just this depth of experience that's beyond it and continuing to nurture it and say yes now I'm willing let's go and keep taking the leap however that leap looks whatever it it looks like being so open in our mind okay this is this is what's coming in now yeah it's great to think to that that it's like with the course when you go through the the course the workbook lessons and so forth and and you come to that part in the course where Jesus says this course is a beginning and not an end and that henceforth you know follow the the directions of the Holy Spirit who will lead you onward it's through prayer it's actually through prayer it's through a devotional life it's through mind training and deep prayer and deep devotion that you awaken to this happy dream this real world this true perception that the Course talks about and so you know over the years you know if you follow along with me you know all the different ways we extend all the different genres all the different tools we use you follow Kirsten's life you know even you know picking up a guitar and and learning a guitar in a year and recording an album and going on tour and these things these are things that train musicians you know it takes years sometimes decades before those things happen but those are all examples of of a life of devotion where you're being done through by the Spirit there's no person that learns a guitar in the year and and records an album and goes out on tour you know it's that's very rare there are even prodigy children you know that are like three four five six and you watch them play their instruments or sit listen to them sing or play the piano and clearly this is not an accomplishment of time they don't come in you know at five years old playing Mozart that's just not a common thing but but the fact that it's happening we could say or the witness of that is showing that this goes back to the mind and you know you could say from a reincarnation perspective that they come into this seeming life with a highly developed skill or ability but really we're starting to realize too there aren't really past lives those are all just symbols and metaphors and and all the symbols in this book are just symbols and metaphors I find that people that have even lived a life in for example a convent or a monastery will say a nun or a monk could pick up this book and and if they've had still some what-if thoughts in their life after like five six decades in the monastery the convent and still any kind of fleeting niggling things they can pick this up and go oh oh they can experience the whole thing just through going on the journey with this because it's not about the form it's about the desire in the mind to pray and listen and follow and Jesus tells us even in the course that you can learn from my experiences we can learn from the experiences we've heard about Jesus in his life we can transfer the training and and and achieve or accept the same lesson that Jesus Christ accepted the atonement and and it's even more fun when you start to think that everything is given the even the form of the curriculum is not something that you can pick you may think oh I can decide whether I want to be a Buddhist in this lifetime so to speak or a Christian or a Hindu no it's all part of a prearranged plan and you don't ultimately even have a choice over the form of the curriculum you just have a choice to accept the content which is forgiveness in your mind and the form will be what it already was it's already written and when you start to really give yourself over to this you can feel a glee and a joy like oh yeah everything has always been perfect everything has been in perfect divine order let all things be exactly as they are all things work together for good all those amazing ideas have always been in play and it was just the ego mind that was trying to hold it off and say no no no I'm not I'm not that I'll never be that I'm gonna be little I'm gonna be small I'm gonna be guilty and it's just the way it is and the Spirit is always caressing us caressing our mind saying oh child choose again you're so much more so I just feel like this is a celebration we're we're having celebration tours celebration gatherings now celebrating a book publishing an audio book coming who knows a movie who knows what all can be kind of fun to watch it if it comes out as a movie though we've seen so many movies over the years to sit back and go oh did I really say that or was that some poetic license that came through in the screenplay you know but yeah it doesn't matter you enjoy you embrace everything you we're not going for any accuracy in form we're going for the fact of God the fact of of spirit you know not for the form yeah yeah that was one of the experiences in the book we've been traveling for a number of months and I had some competition coming up and these thoughts starting to feel like I'm just a handbag I'm an accessory to the mystic everyone wants to hear David speak nobody wants to hear me I don't have anything to say anyway you know all those kind of thoughts and so I feel this competition coming up and we'd be sitting there and David would be speaking and I'd have these thoughts oh I could have said that much better than him oh I wish he would just pause so that I can speak I have something really important to say and this went on for a couple of days and then at the end of the gathering he turned around and say that was wonderful wasn't it Kirsten wasn't it a wonderful gathering I'd be like oh I don't want to burst his bubble and then but somehow magically you know then I would turn around and someone would be walking towards me for a holy encounter and they would say you know you only said one sentence in that whole gathering but that one sentence it was exactly what I needed to hear the kind of encouragement that I needed while I was going through all of this undoing of pride which is such a big part of the journey and then one night this had been going on for a couple of nights and I went into prayer with Jesus I was up all night praying you know it was really up competition I didn't know it was competition actually I just all I could feel was I'm just a handbag what am I doing here and I went into prayer and I gave the thoughts over and then I did see wow it is competition and I went into prayer and remembered a line from the cause the ego is in competition with God that's what it is I could feel it and I had this pop and then I sat there and I received this download and it felt like a two-hour download from the Holy Spirit of this beautiful teaching and in the next night we went to a gathering and we sat there and David picked up the mic introduced us and then he spoke and my download came out of his mouth at the gathering everything that I'd heard and it was this beautiful realization that there is one Holy Spirit and in the moment which is the clearest channel the one that is really open to receive and share the truth or the one dealing with competition and undoing the ego and pride and of course this is the channel that's most gonna be used and yeah it was just I was so delighted and I just got to sit there and and enjoy the whole playing and realize that ah it's all for me again remember the purpose you're here for undoing you're here for the awakening process you're not here to be a teacher be a speaker get your two cents and all of that seems so superficial and put in its rightful place is just little doubt thoughts again and then I could relax and you know just again embrace just the gratitude like my God thank you thank you for giving me this backdrop for seeing this deep healing in my mind. So you're getting the blessing that you got to hear the parable and now here we are but but this is more the fruition of the Holy Relationship where we're just flowing flowing and there's it's like that old song Steely Dan no static at all FM no static at all now Kirsten just flowing and her joy and this are parables from how many 10 12 years ago and and so it just flows and flows and flows and and you know and it's all involuntary so it's very much like different times I've had translators where they're actually channeling they're not interpreting my words and translating my words are actually channeling the Holy Spirit in another language so it's like two channels one coming through in English and one in Spanish or you know it's just all of our collaborations nowadays are just it's just involuntary flow doesn't matter you know who we're collaborating with you know who I'm out on the road with or who you out on the road with we're seeing the witness of the fruition the fruits of the Spirit of all that mind training and all that devotion seemingly for years but you know that's that's what it's about to the fruits the fruits come from the Spirit from the presence from the Holy Instant and how glorious that is and then how glorious it can also come through where people who are just at that stage of starting to let these dark thoughts up these unconscious thoughts can read the parables and go oh thank you this is God speaking to me right now or where I perceive I am and and I just trust that's the blessing isn't that when we've had people we emulate when we've had mentors when we've had heroes we we're inspired by them seemingly at the beginning and then we go so fully into our desire for that experience that that whatever a teacher student falls away leader follower falls away we just merge in this experience of love and joy and happiness so that's how it goes you know that's that's what this is all really about thank God and static what's loud and we're so worthy of being free of it and and knowing that that's just what's being held you know that's it's got to be seen and we want to see it to have it cleared yeah and I I just feel that this book is like a testimony to that it's worth it and it's safe and the the outcome is is knowing your innocent you know and knowing that we're loved and knowing that God's will for us is to be free of every little block in our mind that could somehow cloud our awareness of just this freedom freedom and innocence to to be able to flow with the spirit in the moment without doubt it's a mechanism some of you might have seen the movie it was based on Dan Milman's book way of the peaceful warrior it's Dan and Socrates and that's quite intense it's a very again that's a rapid awakening movie just because it's it's like a glimpse into a very intense teacher-student mechanism there's nothing special about any of these symbols but it's just showing that so what's the difference between that in this book Dan Milman's story is that then in that book too or that movie was Joy Joy came in I think she's part of that the way the spirit used that relationship but it's also kind of got a teacher-student aspect to it and and that's used in a very strong way because the guidance comes through Socrates so strong and so firm at times and and yet Dan's got the same choice that anyone has do I listen to this or not do I follow do I rebel you know we know these experiences we've had them with parents we've had them with partners we've had them with teachers authority figures so to speak in the world we've all gone through this in a pretty intense way we're not unfamiliar with those kind of figures in our dream world in those dream symbols but that's what I think the book will be a gem because it's you're gonna have the some aspects of those things in there and so it's more radical more compressed and for many of you though that isn't that the prayer of your heart you know okay Lord I'm ready here I am let's let's let's get going here I'm ready to engage I'm not willing willing to distract away anymore I'm not willing to run away I'm not really willing to hide from the spirit anymore I'm ready to engage and that's really what this parable is about you know from the beginning when you had head injuries from was it a motor biking accident mountain mountain skiing mountain bike is skiing accident and coming from head injury some kind of brain damage thing and on disability kind of a down on your knees which Kirsten says you know she needed to be brought down on her knees by the spirit very much like Dan Milman you know there was a experience in that movie to very strong willed and had to be broken and then where that movie spirit some of you seen the movie the horse movie spirit where he kind of wanders away from his his group heard of his family and his to go through some pretty extreme things and yet you know all of us have gone through some of those things already and then this book kind of gives the context where when you're watching a movie or reading a book you're just once removed but you can engage the mind and there's a lesson for me in what's being played out in this book just like with the movies you know it's a little bit safer to be sitting in the movie theater and watching Dan go through it with Socrates or with joy you know and so I just feel like that's the value of all this that's that's our joy and we are so spontaneous and open even though it may seem we we still are guided to schedule things and you know it gives people a chance to take time off work or fit it into their busy schedule and and come and get a taste and a whiff of of this amazing healing and then as they do then they go oh my gosh this is what I've been praying for all my life and here it comes I'm gonna say yes to it I'm gonna go for it and that's the spark that that brings it all in pulls it in