 I saw yesterday, there is a post a citizen we applauded on Instagram and it was saying that most Genzi nowadays have found fun in listening to sad music. Okay. Yeah. I didn't know about that very well, looking at some research, but it didn't include that. So, people love, Genzi love sad music. And you know sad music, I don't know how soothing it can be, but do you listen to sad music? Not really, unless I'm heartbroken. Unless you're heartbroken. No, I don't listen to sad music. But it's not wrong to listen to sad music. You know sad music, I think people, sad music is like pop, the R&Bs. Yeah, it's part of soul. A song you listen into and you can just hear the lyrics one by one. You're like, okay, this is me and you start crying, you start shedding tears. Now, aside that, let's move into the social symptom of depression. Because there are a lot of physical symptoms, there are a lot of psychological symptoms. Let's get into the social symptom. This is a person who avoids being in contact with friends or family or even loved ones. You don't want to associate yourself with your family, with your friends. You don't want to be around people who love you or people who you love. Maybe you're avoiding them because you're not okay. I think this is a common symptom that people also hate depression. Because for someone who has been used to people, now you're keeping to yourself. You're keeping to yourself. Now, there are other social symptoms of depression. Could be this is a person who is neglecting his or her hobbies and interests. You're a person who used to love cooking. Nowadays you don't cook, you order in. Hello, can I get this food? Maybe you're a person who used to love swimming, that is your hobby. Used to love these pool games. You don't associate yourself in the same. You're feeling that you're not okay. Or maybe you have noticed a friend because it is very important stuff. Because as much as you're talking about depression and overcoming depression and navigating around depression, you need to understand that as much as yes, you need to check yourself. You also need to understand that you need to be aware of your friend or your loved one. If they are not okay, please don't assume that they are okay. Because there are people out here who are really, they have a very strong personality. They don't really open up to anyone. They feel like they got it all. They feel like when I talk to someone, what value is it? They will perceive me differently. This is not what people know of me. Maybe people know this person who is bubbly, who talks most of the time. But all of a sudden, you are silent. You have noticed a friend who doesn't talk to you. This is a friend who is always isolating him or herself. This is a person who does not want to meet you. Probably you are having challenges at home. You are having challenges at work. You are having challenges in your family. These are some of the social symptoms of depression. I think it's easy for someone to just ignore friends saying that they are not interested in me anymore. You just brush it off, but maybe that's past what is going through. In our days, we are living in a very sad generation in the country. Even in the world. Not only in our country, but I can imagine this economic crisis you have in Kenya. It's not only in Kenya. It's happening across the world. So I can imagine whatever is happening right now, it is sad. People are really undergoing a lot. It is not easy for maybe one to talk about what they are going through. Maybe they have lost a job. You cannot come and tell me you have lost a job. Maybe I used to take you out most of the time. I do this and that. But now you stop doing that because maybe I cannot tell you I have lost my job. Maybe I cannot tell you that I am not okay. Maybe in school, I am not going to school. I am not attending school. And you have noticed a friend. Kila teima nakuambianga nisa inia attendance. You remember while you were in campus? Those friends, I know you used to attend school right? I remember them. You used to attend classes? Where were you? Where were you? I used to attend classes. Good girl, amazing. You are a good girl. You are a good girl. You are a good girl. You have noticed a friend maybe in campus in school. Is a person who calls you inia just sign for me opposite a camp. Most of the time. Maybe it's church. Akujangi church. Maybe we come in the night church. Nowadays I endangi. Because now people need to understand. When you say you are mentally okay. Or your mental health is okay. It's not only psychological emotional and social. Also spiritual comes in. Because you also have spiritual issues nowadays. Most of the time even when someone is depressed. Not because they have psychological symptoms. Because they have spiritual symptoms. Maybe they don't have any connection with God. Totally they don't have any connection with whoever they worship. They feel like there is no meaning in the same. Nowadays you see what spirituality or religion has been perceived. You know you find that people just believe that it's better to stay at my home. Pray and worship there than go to church. So with the same they are hiding in. Because you listen to monu the end of the church. And you say why won't church videos not happen. So that's an excuse to me. And you feel okay. Maybe and it makes sense. But you know you need to check up on your friend. Is this song I love by this lady. I need to know. Lady Libyanca people. This song I've been drinking more alcohol. Oh okay. I've been drinking more alcohol for the past 5 days. You check on me. Did you check on me? I've walked in my room. Eyes are red. And I don't smoke bang. Do you check on me? That part. Because most of the time we assume. We are living in a very sad country by the way. A country whereby we listen to songs like Maisha Niyangu. Vashubu li kama yako. Which is sad, you know. Country enyena sema. Depression ekikikin. Lazimani taki. Takiban. Oh you see to it. We are living in a very sad country. Not only a country but sad times. Where a lot is happening even in families. Now talking about depression. There are some of the causes that maybe you are watching and you don't understand what is really causing. Yeah what causes and triggers. Yes. What is really causing me to get depression. What is really causing me. Maybe I've gone to the psychologist. They say call me. And told me that I am depressed. What really has caused that. Because maybe you cannot understand how are you depressed. You have been doing things as they were. You know most of the time you are normally in denial. You don't want to accept that you are not okay. As human beings. You want to assume that we have all things in control. In order. But you need to understand you are a human being and there are times that you are broken. There are times that you need to take breaks. So what are some of the causes. One of the common causes of depression is you find that childhood experiences maybe your childhood was not okay. You went through childhood trauma. Maybe while you were growing up you grew up in a family where it was chaotic. Maybe you were emotionally abused. Sexually abused. We the same which could trigger. Another one which is common is intake of alcohol. And drugs. There is someone who is watching me think that when I drink alcohol it's a precious what I am going to go with. When I drink alcohol I feel better. I forget my problems. When you find that when your friends come to tell you I am not okay. I am really undergoing this and that. It is a challenge in my life. What we normally tell them is let's go take a shot. One or two, three glasses you will be okay. But you need to understand the moment you intake alcohol the moment you take drugs you will be high for a moment. You won't be high forever. You get back to the problem. You will get back into the same problem. You will not have solved anything. And actually intake of alcohol and drugs it is a risk factor of depression. Maybe you are not depressed yet. So it almost accelerates. Maybe you are not depressed. But if your intake of alcohol is continuous intake of drugs is continuous you are risking depression. That could be the first that could be a cause of depression. Another one is genetics. Maybe your family, your parents here your parents or maybe your great grandparents or your grandparents had a history of depression. So you can inherit that. You can inherit that. It could be genetic. That could be another cause. Another one is life events. Loss of job. Loss of a relationship. Any type of loss. It could really determine any type of loss. It could really trigger you getting depressed also death. The stages of loss and grief is denial, anger, beginning depression acceptance. That could also be a trigger and a cause of depression. And you spoke about childhood traumas. So can childhood traumas catch up with you later in life and become a trigger for depression? Yes, it's gone. One thing you need to understand is that most of the time our childhood traumas manifest later on in experiences or in things as adults. Most of the time we don't really get traumatized at that level. Maybe nowadays you find that in primary school kids high school kids are triggered and they have childhood trauma but normally you don't really see it at that level. But the moment you become an adult the moment the trigger now it manifests now as adult. So yes it does. And the cases some cases that we've had of children committing suicide. How can a child get to that point? As a parent how do you recognize that your child is going through something? For a child to reach to that level of suicidal thought or attempt. It means that this child has been through a lot. This child has been through too much. Is it a story or is it an article or is it a real life stuff I saw on my WhatsApp one of the groups this one of my fellow colleagues Ali Tuma there was this story this is a girl who is in class 7 around 13 yas and nowadays they call it grade 7. Now this girl Ali is at home. Ali is at home and she has been at home very long later. The letter was stipulating that she has been through a lot she has been through a lot of suffering a lot of pain and she doesn't know what to do so I thought that is the best for her is running away from home and it has been one week the parents are coming one week since she flees from home now the question was like what how should you handle such a case with that kind of that sort of girl now I would imagine this is a child who has really gone through a lot emotionally, mentally and maybe you are watching me and this is a high school student a primary school pupil who is watching me right now and is really thinking of actually what I have just said running away from home maybe they feel like if I talk about what I am feeling my parents won't understand me maybe I have parents who are alcoholics or drunkards maybe when I tell them when I open up to them they won't really understand so the only option I think is to run away from home or kill myself let me tell you something maybe you feel maybe right now things are not okay but you need to understand that whatever you are undergoing you need to talk to someone and I am here by the way I am here for you you can talk to me and tell me how you feel what has been happening and I promise I will guide you and I will be with you in each and every step until you recover and for the parents for the parents who are watching those issues that manifest to children as adults most of it will just come from the environment the people who are around this child you know there are two things each and every child needs since childhood love and reassurance being loved being told you are loved and being reassured even in the Bible God tells us He loves us, He reassures us in the Bible verses that He loves us so if a child does not get that love and reassurance it really pains them maybe for example they have grown up in chaotic homes seeing their dad physically abused in the mom maybe they have been sexually abused and they have not told anyone hundreds of such clients whereby you find that this is a client who is an adult over 30 years who is dealing with something that happened when she or he was 15 years maybe sexually abused and really they have not gotten rid of the same and they have maybe gotten into married or in a relationship and it affects them because they have not dealt with that particular issue yet so I am also speaking to someone who has not yet dealt with whatever that happened to him or her since childhood you need to talk to someone find someone you can talk to you can talk to me, you can find another professional to talk to about what you are really undergoing and for the parents please it is very important to check on your children if you are a parent and maybe maybe your child is in campus and if your child is okay maybe he will get a job you don't even want to know how this child is doing and this is your child another day maybe you are having a primary school pupil or in primary or high school maybe at the school and you don't check upon this particular child and you have rooms and you are getting married and you are not involved you guys are doing quiet all the time you need to be very careful you need to really check upon your child don't assume that your child is okay don't assume finally, overcoming depression we have said about speaking to a counselor psychologist about it what are some of the other ways to overcome depression I will group them also in three categories when you talk about overcoming depression there is self-cope therapy and the other one is medication let me start from the last medication is the way of overcoming depression if you get assessed, psychologist you are given medication maybe you are not going any other mentally health illness kuna medication atokopatia and the other thing is therapy one thing people need to understand what was it to kudia therapy people think therapy is for people who are kuku it is necessary I tell my friends and I tell people there are three people you need in your life you need a therapist maybe a spiritual father someone you look up to spiritually therapy is very important how do you self-cope as a person you have been diagnosed you have been assessed and you have been told that you are depressed, you have depression you have major depression what can you do as a person to help yourself get more of the same the first one is the one I just talked about avoiding or cutting down intake of alcohol or drugs maybe you have been diagnosed you have been assessed and you have depression maybe you need to take alcohol and drugs please stop it will affect the other one what you can do is exercise how regularly do you exercise? why are you putting me on the sport? no no no it is important when I say exercise I mean even walks with walks I do walks almost every day how do you define exercise? apana exercise if you can do that well and good but if you cannot do that then take a short walk maybe 10 minute walk it could help the other thing you need to stay connected with family and friends stay connected with them the other one you need to try as much as possible do the things you used to love doing even if you are going to set a certain period just try to do them the same way you took a break you don't know where you are maybe you are on a vacation it is very important to set even if you are going to take a break take a break from work the other thing you need to talk to someone find someone you can trust someone you can confide in and tell them this and this maybe I am undergoing issues in my family in my relationship I am really not okay I need help stay connected with your family and friends you need to understand that it is okay to not be okay but it is not okay to stay that way even though you are having suicidal attempts you need to understand that you can get help and also stuff talking about depression you know relationships can cause depression I know heart breaks it is a type of loss and not only heart breaks but you could be in the wrong type of relationship oh ya it is a toxic relationship and probably they are all in the name of love I love this person I cannot leave them I will endure through thick and thin through thick and thin that costs a lot for better for us I think nowadays vows should be changed for better for us to love and to hold richness and rich because ya this is a toxic partner vows is the same for better for us anani chapa, anani tukana sexual abuse happens even in marriage and you cannot live you find that your comfort is in the same you entrust your happiness on this person no there are three things you need and I need to tell you if you are in a very toxic relationship there are three things you need happiness peace of mind and you need good mental stability if you don't get the three trust me you need to live you need to walk out because honestly speaking it won't work out you think it will work out and maybe stuff and this is something that happens and I can imagine it also affects you because it does affect me too social pressure watu wana peana wuku social media naku flaunt 50 million cash my challenges it gives people pressure so you need to understand also that you need to really limit your time on social media social media is very addictive sana sana which app tiktok tiktok is very addictive when I watch tiktok videos at 7pm but it's one not even three hours later you are just scrolling it doesn't stop people in the background will laugh you can attest you need to understand social media really can impact your mental health so we need to protect our spaces yes, whatever you see whatever you view, whatever you like nowadays I've noticed on social media whatever you view and like sana I don't know why it happens wana pata nangana videos are married it's a wedding it's a pub a nice lady with a gown and the husband is there na wuku apu na view trust you me ita kudyamigi so you need to understand it is important to take breaks on social media you don't have to just say because you are an influencer you do this and that, you are in the media you are helping people you need to also take care of yourself take social breaks I wish we could continue with this conversation you may share but we will definitely have this conversation time and time again so what is that one key thing that you want to tell someone from all this and share also your social media handle this is your camera alright how many minutes because I can talk 30 seconds if you are watching me right now and maybe you are at a phase right now which is not okay things are not working on your side you have lost your job, you have lost your partner you have lost everything and you feel hopeless, you feel helpless you feel like you cannot get help you feel like people around you cannot understand you feel like your friends don't even get you you feel like no one can be there for you let me tell you something you feel also suicidal let me tell you something, there is hope you are not alone there are people around you who can help you so remember also it is okay to not be okay but it is not okay to stay that way so talk to someone if you are watching me and you need psychological counseling you need psychosocial support my number is 0725-0293-98 I repeat 0725-029398 my social media handles on Instagram at official Anthony Jenga official then A-N-T-H-O-N-Y-N-J-E-N-G official Anthony Jenga on Instagram on Tiktok, on Facebook Anthony Jenga, thank you so much alright thank you very much Anthony for sharing such amazing insights I'm sure someone has taken something from it that has been Anthony Jenga a counselor is talking to us about overcoming depression that's why we break the conversation to our close but remember you can also share with us your thoughts on our social media handles at Y254 using the hashtag why in the morning we're going to take a short break and then we'll be back with the next interviews don't go too far, it's going to be an interesting one