 Let me see, he'll get it live, situated. Let me see, save, highlight, get the chat situated. Y'all give me one second here. All right, let me see. All right, appreciate y'all for joining me tonight. Now, you know my life, slowing down a little bit in certain ways, I didn't get a video up to date because I was working all day trying to get my car fixed. I wish I knew a little mechanic. Went to get my old car fixed. People told me $5,000 for a transmission. I said, boy, look here, y'all must support Trump. All right, let me get some of these questions. Tony, what if I saw something for salvation? How do I keep up the good work of the Lord? What if I saw something? How do I keep up the good work of the Lord? Hakisha, I don't understand your question. I'm not sure what you mean on that one. Not sure what you mean. But don't get weary and well-done. Do men ever get heartbroken? If so, in what type of scenario? From how you describe it, it seems like men are heartless savages. There is a large part of a man that is a heartless savage, just the nature of a man. And again, you've got to realize what men do, what men capable of, just watch the evening news and that show you that side of men. Now, do men get heartbroken? Absolutely, because anybody with a heart can be heartbroken. But the thing about it is, it's hard to get your heart broken if you don't give your whole heart. And so that's why a lot of men don't get their heart broken because they don't give their whole heart. But typically it's when a woman cheats on a man or a woman leaves a man because she feels he's not the one. That's typically what causes a man heartbreak. But it could kind of also be ego break. All right, Tony Bridget, God bless you now. Is the conference in California still on because I live in Pennsylvania and with new cases, we are back on, no, that self love retreat, I'm not sure if you were already, if you already got a ticket, if you already signed up, the retreat center is shut down. So they were supposed to email everybody, but I'm not sure if it's still up on the site or what have you. But they were supposed to email everybody. Why would a man tell me I'm out of his league? If he's still pursuing you, then it's just a compliment. It's a compliment. If he's not pursuing you, if he stopped pursuing you, it means that he's lying to you, but he doesn't want to tell you that he's out of your league. See, a lot of times a man will tell you what'll make you feel good and what won't hurt your feelings. But you never out of a man's league because we all want what we can't have. That's like you telling your boss, hey, you paying me a million dollars a year is just out of my league. I will, I refuse to accept a salary of $1 million a year because I am only worth 30,000, do not. If you pay me a million, I am sending a check back for 970,000. That's essentially what a man is saying when he says you out of his league. It's really just, what he's really saying in English is you're not the woman for him. Y'all are not a fit, but he don't want to tell you that because he don't know how to tell you that and he don't want to hurt your feelings. So he say, you too independent, you out of my league, you deserve better. It's me not you, you know, he goes with those things. Lakeisha, God play, thank you, Tony. I will pay for session for further explanation. Thanks for your work and thanks, Queen. God bless you. How did you and the Queen go to, did you and the Queen go to marriage counseling before getting married and can that make or break a relationship? No, we didn't, we did it. We kind of went to my dad. He's a relationship coach. He's on my mentor.life as well. And we got a little help, but of course in my father. So it kind of seemed like it was one sided, you know, to my wife, but we didn't go to anybody else because we got married in 2007. So in our community, you know, in our race, you know, in our culture, it wasn't really a thing. Like it wasn't, you didn't really hear about the A, you need to go to relationship counseling, you know, 13 years ago, because of YouTube, pop it up after that or blowing up after that, you know, Instagram, Facebook, now coaching and counseling and therapy is more mainstream now because we all online with a presence online. So we didn't, we didn't do that. We had, we learned the hard way and that's why I could teach today cause I had to learn the hard way. Tiffany Lane, God bless you, Mr. Gaston. Why would a man in his right senses think that having a female roommate while he's in a relationship is okay? I think this man is trying me with this topic. I told him I'm out of soul. It's not that he thinks it's okay. It's just that he's so used to being able to talk women out of their intuition, talk women out of their common sense. And it's really easy to talk women out of their common sense and he's experienced that time and time again. So that's why he's trying. You like a baser because, I wouldn't even when I say trying like a baser for those of y'all don't know that I mean free basing, meaning crackhead, meaning drug addict. So when you hear him say try like a baser. So that's why he's trying. You like a baser because he feels like he could talk you out of your senses, your common sense too. It's something that some men try to do. Kylie, God bless you, talking to a guy. He says him and a particular girl are friends. She's not his type, but he always driving her car and he brings her to work. It's a mess that you shouldn't be in but he driving her car. So if he driving her car and he taking her to work, she think they something. She think they something because he's not a driver. He's not a driver. So she think they something regardless of what he tell you. And so it just sound he trying to cheat. So she's in a relationship with a single man. And if they are truly platonic friends, then you still need to keep it moving cause he need to have his own car still to happen to borrow her car. Miss Wanda God bless you. 50 year old single independent entrepreneur. I'm hopeless in terms of a suitable companion looking to get married. How should I proceed? Thanks and blessings. Well, I'll tell you, if you are hopeless, then it ain't nothing I could tell you. Ain't nothing I could do to help you on that one now if you're hopeless. But once you shift your mindset, you gotta realize when you feel hopeless, you look hopeless. So when your husband sees you, you look hopeless. And you got homeless, that's not hopeless. They got a slogan to say homeless, but not hopeless. So you got homeless, that's not hopeless. So if you single independent entrepreneur and you look hopeless cause you've been telling yourself, man, you mean sorry, nobody out here. So the first thing you're gonna have to do is shift your mindset. When you shift your mindset, you're gonna radiate, you're gonna glow. See, I'm telling myself right now, I'm called to this. This is my calling, I'm doing the work of the Lord, so it come in my energy. If I was telling myself, oh my goodness, I'm scared, I'm so scared, I'm nervous, I shouldn't be doing it, people gonna be judging, my energy will be totally different. So it's all about what you tell yourself and then you're gonna track, you're gonna track based on what you feel you deserve. Jackie M. God bless you, seven year relationship ended and he acted like it was no big deal, like he didn't care. He walked away with no remorse, no compassion. Why? Did all those years mean nothing? They meant a lot. They meant a lot and he got a soul tie that's extremely, extremely tight. So it's like this right here, see a soul tie. And when I talk about a soul tie now, it's somebody else's turn, somebody made up. It's term is not in the Bible, but guess what a soul tie right here feel like to these men. And that's why when I tell y'all soul tie, when I say a soul tie, scrangling them, that's what I'm talking about. That he got this soul tie, he tried to get away from you and it's pulling on, it's pulling on, he can't breathe. So he got to get back to you. And when he get back to you, he get a little looseness. He could breathe a little bit. So he'll be back, he'll be back, but you gotta decide are you done? So you got to decide are you done? And if you don't make a decision, then you're gonna be standing still and he'll be running in and out your life. And I'm a God bless you. Hey Tony, I've had guys tell me that I'm too real for them and I'm perfect. I don't understand why they would question my character of being an authentic woman. Okay, I see what this is. I see what the problem is tonight. I see what the problem is tonight. Okay, I'm gonna tell y'all what y'all problem is. Y'all problem is that y'all believe what men say. That's y'all problem, okay? Let me tell you, you have to assume everything a man tell you is a lie. See, you got the court of law. What do you got to do in the court of law? In order to get a conviction, what you got to do in the court of law? You got to prove it beyond a reasonable doubt. So when you in a relationship, this is what I call the court of love. What you got to do in the court of love is prove it beyond a reasonable doubt. So nothing a man says is fact. You can't listen to nothing he say. That's why I tell people all the time, you got to be like Helen Keller. See, Helen Keller was blind and she was deaf. It's about what you feel. You see what I mean? It's about what you can confirm in your heart. It ain't about what come out of his mouth, what you're action saying. I can't hear you, show me what you're talking about. I can't even see everything you're doing. I only could see half of what you're doing. So now you got to be confirmed in your heart and I see what it is, y'all believe in what a man tell you. Men don't come into your life to tell you the truth. He got to show you the truth. And if you don't see it backed up by actions, if the actions don't exemplify what he said out of his mouth, then he lying. Oh God, bless your high tone. The ex broke up with me after six months. He needed his space. I accepted the breakup. The problem is we are neighbors. So I'm sure we'll cross paths and I feel that'll affect my healing process. Any advice. You're right, you just gonna have to heal through it. The good thing is it's only six months. So try to change your routine. Try to change when you come in, come out for a little while. It'll take you a few months to get over it. He said he needed space, now let him keep his space. Don't not let him come back. Don't let him come back. If he wanna come back, he didn't jump through hoops. If he wanna come back, he need to be doing hurdles and somersaults and cartwheels. Cause really what he telling you is you're not the one. He telling you that you're not the one or he's not the one for you. Meaning that he too immature or he's not ready which really mean you're not the one. Cause a man always feel like he's the one. So you just gotta keep him moving. Just change when you come in, change the route you go and do your best when you see him. Turn your head, keep going. Black girls rock. God bless your tone. When my fiance and I have a disagreement he will get cold and distant. He says that's how he deals with things but it makes me feel unloved and neglected. Well, what you're gonna have to do is you're gonna have to express to him. You're gonna have to express to him that behavior you know shutting down and not communicating is unacceptable cause communication to a relationship is like oxygen to life. Now what you can't do is express weakness. So when the words you use very powerful words you said you feel unloved and neglected. So if you express to him that you want him to grow in the area of communication and be able to articulate his thoughts and feelings if you address that, you express that then what you're gonna have to do is ignore that behavior when he is distant and quiet because see when you go to pouting, you go to crying you go to begging and pleading and chasing them sniffing and booty, then now you give him power. So when you do that you reinforce that behavior so now every time y'all have a disagreement if he see that it hurts you, it affects you he gonna keep doing it. See you only reward the behaviors that you wanna see repeated. If you don't wanna see the behavior repeated then you gotta ignore it or you gotta stop it. That's what you got to realize but when you go to pouting, your feelings hurt he said, okay, I got him. Boom, every time he wanna get you, that's what he do. New day, now if you just walk around like ain't nothing happening like everything going good, everything honking door you just, okay, all right. Hey, do you want something to eat? Okay, nevermind, all right, I'm eating. Like that lady who had that microphone you know that lady who had that microphone and she be there and she be eating them pickles and she be clicking on that keyboard with that microphone man, her got the same microphone you use this though somebody you can have it if you wanna start your podcast, I'll mail it to you. Lord give him full line. Now you pay shipping and handling, I might let you have it. That's what you got to do. He sitting over there, get that remote control and then he's gonna be sitting over there. Then what he gonna do? He gonna snap right out of, he gonna snap right out of. Hey, yeah, so let me talk to you. But see when you sad and pouting and all that you give him power. So understand that new day, God bless you. High Tony, I'm in the process of listening to a woman's influence. Thank you and your wife for your transparency. It's such a blessing. Hey, God bless you now, God bless you. Shatara, God bless you now, God bless you. Tabby, God bless you. Hey y'all try to keep only questions in the chat cause see when I be expressing some stuff I get long winded. See how I miss Erica upgrade Davis and then Erica be cussing me out in a little bit. Tony, you miss my message two nights in a row. I miss Erica message last night but I see you right here Erica. I dated a 22 year old military man. He was married for three years, had an ex fiance, got somebody pregnant but she got a, I think he cheated, red flag. All right Erica, now come on now Erica, now come on now. That was a five dollar question in both sense of the word now, come on now Erica. Now you know, don't be doing me like that. Don't do me like that Erica. I'm tying too precious now. Read the question, read the question back to yourself. And y'all can't be doing me like that now. Don't be doing me like that on him. Y'all become, oh yeah Tony I wanna ask you is the sky blue? Because I just want to know is the sky blue? And I'm like, and another question. Okay, all right Tony forgive my ask that question but I have one more question. It's water wet. And so what I want y'all to do when you get ready to ask that question, read that question in your mind one more time. All right, come on now. But we don't get this time back in life what the Lord and gave us. Veronica God bless a guy in the halfway house keeps calling me on Facebook. I keep ignoring his calls. Is it possible he is a decent guy? Yeah well, he halfway decent. It's possible he halfway decent in the halfway house. But do you want a halfway decent man living in a halfway house? Because what you gotta ask yourself is what can he do for you? You see what I mean? So yeah, I always tell y'all don't judge a man just by the money. But listen, you ain't got to have a mansion but you need to have a whole way house. He has a halfway house. He in the halfway, he need a whole way house before he get in a relationship. So you have to look at that and say, okay, he half of the way, keep on coming. Keep on coming. You're gonna get all of the way. Then we can begin to talk. And so that's what you got to realize right there. You really can't have no whole relationship with a man in a halfway house. Rachel God bless. And can you talk about going from independent to interdependent when as a single parent you're used to doing it on your own. I wouldn't mind a man's help. I'm just used to taking care of things. Rachel, keep taking care of things. Keep taking care of things. But when you meet this man, you got to, and you talking to him and you get to know him, you learn his strengths. And so you let him do what he do. So listen, y'all don't see my wife arguing and fighting and competing with me about to hear YouTube. My wife got a YouTube, she upload one video a year. She may get into it a little more later, but that ain't necessarily what she feel like her calling is. So she let me do what I do. I create the courses. I do the YouTube. I do the speaking engagement. I write the books. She let me do what I do. Instead of saying, hey, sit down, don't do nothing. Let me pay all the bills. Let me do all the work. So interdependent, all that mean is letting a man operate in his gifts. That don't mean you stop doing what you do. That mean let him operate in his gifts and everything the work got from there. Recovery and God bless him. God bless you Amber. Now Amber, when you go on my mentor.life and you click on and see Amber done got why, she say ain't got to spend no $1,000 or no marketing. Let me go ahead and drop the blessing on Tony. And that ain't why she did it, but that's what the Lord got for her. When you go on my mentor.life and you click browse coaches or you click hire a coach. The top coach, the first person is gonna be Amber. You're gonna, she got the same picture as she got on here. Y'all go book Amber for a session. She a great coach. I ain't had no negative feedback bottle. If I get negative feedback bottle, I'll be on here talking about it, okay? Amber know that. But she do her job. She take care of her clients. She soul into their lives. She coach them too good. She actually too good of a coach. Way better than me. A lot more attention to detail. Cause sometimes I build them sessions. I sometimes be falling asleep on y'all. I said, Lord, I just, I said, Lord, is you still calling me the coacher? Cause I missed the last five minutes of what this person said. But Amber, she gonna take care of you. Tee Lee God bless you. Hey Tony, for God says I knew somebody. I knew nobody could take you away from me because of certain things I do for him. What is he saying? Well, you got to look at the things that you do for him. Basically he's saying, you're a do girl and boo boo the fool. Basically that's what he's saying. Evette God bless you. God bless you Evette. Now somebody, Michelle Wiles, God bless you now. God bless you. Just a small blessing. Keep doing God work. That's just the delt came in there flexing muscles. She said, just a small blessing. Because you said that small, that mean you got an abundant mindset and the Lord got more for you. God bless you. Shatara bless you. So I connected with a guy, but I realized he is friends with this guy. I had a six month situation with a year ago. Should I mention it or no? For one, he may already know and two, yes, you should mention it. But when you mention it, you got to keep your legs closed. When you mention it, do not get on your bike because you got to stay off your bike so that you know he's really into you. Because see this is the thing. A man don't care about sleeping with you if you didn't dealt with a man he knows. What he cares about is marrying you if you didn't dealt with a man he knows. So if you keep your legs closed, then if you're not the one he gonna move on by this business. If you're the one he gonna wait and he gonna build with you and fall in love with you and y'all gonna get engaged and get married and it's no problem. But if you tell him you was dealing with a guy he knows, but then you get in that bed, he gonna take that from you all day and twice on Sunday because he living and saying, kiddie God bless your boyfriend has cheated several times. Hey y'all listen, last night I got a lot of questions. The night I see I'm getting a lot of questions. So the night I'm gonna tell you I feel like the Lord only called me to a hour tonight. I feel like the Lord has only called me to a hour tonight. At 59 minutes I will let you know if the Lord has changed my spirit. But as of right now, the Lord only called me to a hour tonight. I just want you to understand, kiddie God bless your boyfriend has cheated several times before. Now he had the audacity to bring a woman where I can see him with her. Why is he bringing her and hit the other? Kiddie, I'm not 100% sure on that one, kiddie. But if he bringing you where he can see you, that means it's so tied getting to him and he trying to make you mad. He trying to make you mad so you can't let it make you mad and you can't show that it's bothering you. Somebody said, do we keep posting our question if it feels missed? Well, as long as you see people popping in at the top, I'm gonna keep missing your question because I got to address those at the top first because that's what pop up on my screen in the color. But when those gone, then I go back to the chat. If you drop it in there right then when you don't hear me talking and I'm coming back to the chat, now I liable to see you, I'm liable to see you. I just saw you right there because I could see the down there like a transcript. Sonny God bless you. He told me I had him effed up over an assumption. I got turned off instantly and now I don't want to be bothered with him. Am I overreacting? If he said the word like, if he said you got me effed up like with F apostrophe D, then you could be overreacting. If he said the whole word with all the letters in it, then you're not overreacting because a man who will say that to you, you got me effed up with all the letters in it. That's a man that will, and with those kind of men, because if he gonna curse at you like that and it's early on, that let me know that he got other stuff in his spirit. So you wanna really be careful about those kind of men. Soul for heart. Tony, you mentioned most men truly do not fall in love but can have soul ties. It's the attachment of a soul tie and familiarity. The closest thing most men get to being in love. For about 60 to 70% of men, yes. About 60 to 70% of men, yes. And of course, these are just my numbers now. Every science, relationship scientists have their own numbers based on their studies. But from my studies, it's about 60 to 70 men. That's true. Marcia, God bless you. Hi Tony, you talked to me on confidence yesterday, 55 and want to date, but I get cold feet when it's time to meet. It's been a while since my divorce. I was not happy after 16 years of marriage. I see. Now see them 16 years gotta be processed. So you probably may need four sessions of coaching, who I mentioned earlier, Amber. Amber went through a divorce herself and she has completely healed, just great spirit, glowing. Amber will be a great coach for you. And I've never been divorced, so I don't understand the pain of a divorce. So, and I'm 36 too. So, it's still my perspective, it's my perspective. It's not that I can't say a few things that could help you, but visit my mentor.life. I think it's some better options out there for you. But you're gonna need about four sessions of coaching. Minimum, you might need up to 12. See, love, God bless you, God bless you. I'm a foster parent, in addition to a child and family therapist. I feel like it's all part of my calling. However, friends keep saying that the kids will hinder my dating life. So now I rarely date because these are my babies, am I wrong? You're not wrong, you're not wrong and they are not wrong. The kids will hinder your dating life, but the man for you will not be hindered by it. So every walking man is not gonna come into that situation, but the man for you will be fine. He wanna be a foster daddy. He might have him a foster child too. Y'all, now y'all become a blended foster family. So he may, he gonna be fine with it. So you just gotta keep going till you get to the man for you. But don't stop living your purpose and serving the way you're serving. Do that, tall girls, rock God bless you. He messed up giving him a second chance. He gave me the passcode to his phone and social media. How do I know he's sincere and changed? What else do I ask for? Well, you only know by time. You only know it may take you six months to 12 months. So you gotta ask yourself, do you got that kind of time? And do some things with them. You know, y'all read a book together. A woman's influence, make it work. Y'all read a book together or listen to the book. If you don't like to read or you don't like to read, it's on audio too. Get some audio books. You listen to a chapter a day. You listen to the chapter that day on launch, going to work, launch, coming home that night. Y'all talk about that chapter so that you can actively be a part of his growth. Okay, God bless you. Now thank you for being an example of a healed man of God. You have protected me from grown boys and crazies. I have been truly blessed by your videos about to write my book or become a mentor, trying to decide which one first. God bless you now, God bless you. It kind of depends on if you wanna return on your investment and you want your work to also be your living like if you wanna live your purpose but be able to give more time to it then get your life coach certification and become a life coach. Because you can be earning while you're serving. Whereas when you write a book that's a work of love, a labor of love and only 2% of authors, only 2% of authors sell more than 2,000 books in a lifetime. 2,000 book sales equates to $14,000. You can't really do, you know and if that's all you're doing your lifetime like 98% of authors don't even hit that point. So writing a book is just a labor of love, it's legacy but if you kind of wanna be able to live your purpose and earn consistently, then coaching would be a good step and then you can also, you could do both, you know most coaches write a book. Precious Ruby God bless you. I want to do things differently when it comes to guys and relationships. I want to be friends with a guy first. How do I go about it? Do I tell him I'm looking to be friends first thoughts? Well, what you gotta understand is that you don't, you are friends in a relationship. So if he likes you romantically and you like him romantically like y'all are a romantic interest that doesn't mean that you're on your back. That don't mean you're on your back. You're still friends but you're dating with purpose. See when you just go in and there's no mutual romantic interest then you are platonic friends. And it's not good to go from being platonic friends with no talk of being in a relationship to going into a relationship. So understand that. So you do need to be intentional about what you're doing. Angela God bless you. Hi, Mr. T, my sister and I found out we dated the same man. He spent hours on the phone with me and proposed. I said, no, was I wrong? I mean, that's up to you, sister. That's up to you. You probably was right. You know, if you said no, you said no for a reason. If you didn't want to be dealing with a man laying down with a man that you know that being with your sister is just what would have been awkward, then you did the right thing. I believe you did the right thing. I wouldn't be dealing with somebody that a sibling dealt with. Nikki Rowland, God bless you. Now, thank you for your ministry. Bless you and your family. God bless you, now. Now I'm trying to, I hope I don't miss anybody. Now, all right, I was about to go on to the chat and somebody popped in here. Me or God bless you. Why would a man keep coming back after you tell him over and over you don't want to be bothered with him anymore? Used to be friends with benefits years ago. What that shows you, what that shows you, y'all forgive me, I have something on my hand. What that shows you right there is just how men think about a woman's will, a woman's desires. He don't believe you. And so that's why when you're dealing with a man, you got to show him what you're talking about. So if you keep saying, I don't want to deal with you, but you keep saying that and he keep getting to hear you say that or read you saying that, then you lie. When he reaching out and he can't reach you, he doesn't hear from you. Now he knows you're serious. Or you respond and say, listen, if you keep writing me, I'm gonna block you. And if you go to calling me private, I'm gonna put a restraining order on you. So if you really done, be done. See, a lot of times you keep that door open because deep down you don't know if you all the way done. So you got to ask yourself, are you really done? Matt, God bless you. I need coaching, TG. I still haven't told man about the baby. He was adamant about me not keeping the baby, but I already filed child support. He is older slash crazy. Yup, you need coaching. You need coaching. You need coaching. I can't touch on that here. That's too deep. Okay, God bless you. Thanks Tony. We'll let you know when I become a life coach. God bless you. Now, let me know now. Let me know. God bless you. Hi Tony. I'm developing a garden product this year, but worried about putting money into an idea that won't profit again. Any advice on pre-selling or should I hire a business coach? Well, I'm a business coach and then started 13 companies, didn't keep all of them active, got over 50 streams of income. I give you some insight now. I give you some insight. Now, some insight, but you gotta invest in yourself. But the key is is that there's a lot of scams out here. You got a lot of people that, they'll say, oh, I'm gonna charge you 5,000 for consulting. I'm gonna charge 10,000 for consulting and they just take your money. So if you do work with coaches, just pay an hourly rate and they need to be reasonable. Nothing over $500 an hour to get some insight. If they wanna go charging more than that per hour, or they gotta lock you in a 20, you know, 5,000, 10,000 for consulting, go on about your business. Go on about your business, unless you didn't went to their garden and seen they brought up, sniffed it, smelt it, taste it, held it, and you see they garden product balling out of control, then okay, you could pay a little more, but that's a unique lane. The piano player, God bless you, I struggle saying that were recommendations on how to earn $1,000 while in college, no work. Well, you could do virtual assistant work. It's a lot of virtual assistant companies out there. One of them called B-L-A, I think it's B-E-L-A-Y. I was getting ready to hire them. And you also, if you got in it, whether you wanna proof read, if you catch typos, you could sign up on freelance insights like Fiverr, F-I-V-E-R-R.com, anything you could do, proof read, write blogs, you could Google that, that really ain't my specialty on making love here and there, but it's so many people that they make a living off telling you how to make money online. All right, and I make sure you put hashtag Q in front of your question. I told him, I'm a single mom, full-time employed, and he still complained about me not talking on video chat each night, thoughts. Only video chatted two times, nothing inappropriate either. Well, if you don't have time for a man, if you ain't got time to video chat every night, then that mean you ain't got time for a man. So you should need to be entertaining me, because if you gonna talk to somebody, you need to talk to them, because your life on the line, there's somebody that could put you in little pieces and have you in the freezer. So you need to know who you're talking to, talking to somebody every other day, that ain't enough. If you gonna talk to somebody and end up falling in the bed with them, end up getting in a relationship with them, you need to make time for them. If you ain't got time for them, then don't date, because you work X hour to X hour, you get off, you come home, you cook dinner, you got kids, they eat dinner, they got a bedtime. So now what you doing from their bedtime to your bedtime? If a man can't fit in that time, then you need to just focus on being a single mom, being an absolute best single mom, you could absolutely be, put the kid down and you go right to sleep. So you could be the absolute best worker on the job. Thank for God bless you, now. He asked me, what in a man? Is that a trick question? Maybe what are you looking for in a man? He also has a problem that I don't want us to spend the night if we date. I'm being abstinent. Yeah, it's a trick question, but it's kinda like a question so he know what role to play or just conversation piece. But it lets a man know what role to play. So when a man asks you that, your answer should be, I know when I see it. And if you got a problem with not spending the night, that lets you know y'all on two different pages so you gotta really see, does he really have a problem or he just trying to talk you out of your commitment to abstinence. Christy Jones, God bless you. High tone and when a guy is wrong about something, how long will it take for him to apologize? Instantly, it is his pride. It is his pride, a test, grown boy, a grown man difference. A grown man, it'll take a grown man at least an hour. Anyone from one to 24 hours, a grown man. A grown boy, he's not gonna apologize. He gonna make excuses, he gonna keep going, but apologizing is a huge sign. If you get a man that's wrong and he can apologize, that's big. Black girls rock God bless. Tony, can you explain the difference between a man who has spiritual beliefs versus religious beliefs? Well, to each person it'll be different, but what you may see is he may say I believe in God, but I don't believe in Christianity. That spiritual beliefs, meaning he believes in spirits, he believes in good and evil, he believes in a higher power, or he believes in just energy, positive and negative energy, good and evil energy, but that spiritual beliefs, religious beliefs will be inside of a religion, like I'm a Christian, that's a religion. So he may not have a religion, but he says he's spiritual, but to each person it could mean something different. Me personally, if you have a religion, the person you're dealing with need to be of that religion because your religion is your foundation. If they don't have the same foundation, then you can't build together. So you can't build on rock and they're building on sand. So if you try to do that, you unequally yoke. Tiara, in God bless you, what is the best way to wait? I desire marriage, but I refuse to settle. I have so much love to give, but I've given to the wrong man, I am tired. Well, you got to really know what you're looking for in a man, even if you got to write it down, get it in your spirit, write it upon the tables of your heart. And then when you know what you're looking for in a man, you got to get the knowledge. So while you're here, hearing all of these different kinds of questions, you get the knowledge. So now when you get the knowledge, when you sit down with a man for the first date, you could recognize the red flags. When you recognize the red flags, now you can leave. That's the best way to wait. So you actively date, but you cut it off as soon as you see a deal breaker. And the only way you do that is if you know what you're looking for. And that's the thing, a lot of women don't know what they're looking for. Better days, God bless you. Tony, what do you think of the seven year itch in marriage? Is it related to the grass is greener on the other side? I'm gonna just assume that's what contextually what you're talking about, the seven year itch in a marriage. Now I really don't recall that itch. I would probably itch in the first two years of marriage. If you itch in that the seven year marriage, that means that the relationship was dead in the first two years. And you prolong the itch, put your little itch cream on it. This is actually lotion, it's not itch cream. People don't think why I got itch cream, this lotion. Okay, you put your little itch cream on it. And then seven years, nine you fed up. But yeah, I would itch in the first two years while I'm falling in love, getting used to marriage, all of that. After that, it was a, I'm locked in, I'm all the way in. So it is grass is green on the other side. But see the issue is the grass had been green. They just tired of faking. After checking a man on not keeping his word, when do you know it's time to cut him off after a couple of times of checking him on it? Well, I would say about a third time, it's time to go and let go. It's time to go and let go. Especially if it's in a short amount of time. If it spans across five years, seven years, 10 years. And then it's also about what is keeping his word. If it's about cheating, then of course, one time. If it's about, he say I'm gonna call you at nine, but then he call you at 11, that's a little different. He do it this year and then he do it in 2022. That's a little different. Inside of six months, 12 months, he didn't drop his word five, six times. Now you know, you got a man with low character, poor integrity, and you about to waste your time. LaToya, God bless your high tone. It took your certification and I'm now on my mentor.life. I self-published two books for women. I'm live every day on Facebook and upload daily to my YouTube. Any other suggestions on getting book. Hey, you doing what you got to do. It's gonna come. Now just make sure your heart is in the right place. Make sure that you're operating from a pure place, from a place of righteousness. Make sure you're right with God. And if you do that, what's gonna happen now is you're gonna have some time in the valley just to make sure you commit it. Cause that's where you grow at. So when you giving, giving, giving, giving, giving and nothing's coming, that's where you're being developed. That's where you're growing. If you give up in the middle of that, that's when you can't be trusted. So you got to enjoy those times and you got to be uploading on YouTube and going live like you talking to a million people. And when you get on that live and ain't nobody on there and you trying to stay calm and you go to sweating and ain't nobody on that. You talking to yourself and then one person pop on them and they know that it's just you and them and you try to keep the energy like you talking to a thousand people and that person on the other side of that camera looking at you like, Oh Lord, but hey, come here. Don't, don't, don't pull up on Facebook cause she don't need two people. Just come on here and look at Latoya. Now I'm the only one on here and Latoya. She thinks, she's Sarita Jakes. Look at the girl. And that's what they're on the other side doing. You got to keep that energy. You got to keep going. You got to keep. And when you do that, guess what? It's a promise on the other side. Cause I'd have been on that live with nobody on there. And then one person on them, they keep popping off and popping back on and see if they computer acting up because they see one person. So if you could get through that, you're going to be, you're going to be built for success. Now, hold on a minute. Hold on a minute. I miss a question. I miss somebody. Okay. Oh, I got that one. See Latoya. Natasha, God bless you. Hi, Tony. Can you speak on the current state of femininity or lack thereof in today's society from a male's perspective and how it impacts dating? You know, I keep hearing that, but the beyond switch, I just don't really pay enough attention to women to know the differences. And because I'm not dating, I'm really not paying enough attention to it, but I will tell you this now. I don't really see a lack of femininity. You know, and who defines femininity? I feel like that's a definition that each woman defines for herself. So wearing jeans with tembling boots could be feminine to the one woman. And wearing six inch heels with a skirt could be feminine to the next woman. So that's to each their own. And that's gonna be different from a man too, because I know a lot of men, like we used to like women who wear Jordans, you know, who she rocked. My wife used to wear a skirt, like a jeans skirt, come about the middle of her thighs with a little, with a farm-fitting t-shirt, with a little glitter word on there, with some Jordans. And so for me, that was perfect because it was a mix of, you know, a woman's attire with some basketball shoes. I thought that was absolutely sexy. And so, but then there was some women who they farm-fitting tight, everything. You could count the cellulites while they walking. All right, let me see. Okay, she got 18 cellulites on that booty cheek. You know, one, two, three, four, five. Okay, she got 24 cellulite on that booty cheek. That's interesting. All right, so, okay, all right. So I must have told her over 42 cellulite, okay. Some women dress like that. And that's what they think is feminine. So it's to each their own and to be on switching. It don't impact day. It don't impact day like people want to make it out to be because it's, you could bark. You could bark, you could be a woman barking like a dog. If it's longest, as long as this here, do this. As long as this here, do this. That's all that man worried about. You could talk to him in barks. And as long as this here, do this, he gonna be barking right. Y'all will be sitting there barking at each other. So that's what you got to understand. It's something that bloggers and writers try to come up with some content and make a big deal out of something. And then you got women trying to put on all this makeup and all this lipstick and dress all this kind of way. Cause somebody online told them, y'all killing the femininity. You need to be more feminine. So you can get your man and keep a man. How you think a man want you and you masculine. You got too much masculine energy. And man ain't told you that. Not no real man. Better days, God bless you. Tony, I have a follow up question. If it is related to the grass, if it is related to the grass being greener, does the man then leave because he no longer values his woman or because his options are better? It's because he is tired of his woman. It's because he has had his fill with her. So unless a man falls in love, doing the same thing over and over with the same person gets old. But she would love it's new and it's fresh every day. Like because I'm in love with my wife, we've been married over 13 years. Every time I look at her, I lust after her. Every time, every time I look at her, I lust after her. And if I lost for so many days and she, every time we get in the bed, she got a headache for some reason and the devil jump on her back. The devil be jumping on the back because of the work that I do. He'll jump on her bike, give her my grain, make her real tired. And he'd be testing me to make me get tired and weary and wanna look elsewhere. So but the Lord didn't let me know that. So I'd be up on the game. So now if I'd been lost after a few days and she'd be tired every time we get in the bed. So then now I try not to look for a little bit. Cause she love when I fill up her tank lustin after I try not to look a little bit. But even when I try not to look, I still be lustin. Why? Cause I'm in love with her. So when a man get that seven year itch, it ain't really that the option is better because it's a lot of women watch they man lead them and go date a woman, you know, look like this hill. Now, I'm not saying this hill look bad. I'm not saying she look bad. Okay. The beauty is in the eye to behold them. But the woman, she said, the woman she might look like this hill. And then she say, Oh, well why you left me and went to be with her? Oh, he might be with this woman. And then this right here look good. And then he go be with this woman. And then sometimes a man leave a woman, you know, who might be built like this. And then he go get a woman built like this. And so this woman over here, she says she got it going on. And she like, well, why he left me for this woman built like this. And it just, it ain't really had nothing to do with the officer being better. It's just, he just tired of this over here. He'd have had it so many times. He'd have been in it so many times. He done seen it, smelt it, taste it, every kind of way it could be presented. And he never fell in love. So because he never fell in love, I just, it just hit myself. I'm gonna have to do a video on colorism cause I know somebody over there. Oh, so why are you trying to say he lead a black woman for the light scare woman? All right, get a email tonight. And I'm like, man, there's just two cars that was on my desk. Okay, now I just picked the cars up. This one was in the front. This one was in the back. Man, please address your pain and stop coming over here to me with that. I'm blank, I'm blank. Okay. And I believe God bless you. Hey, y'all got about nine more minutes. Now I got about nine more minutes. Now I get your questions in. And I'm believe, should I take my baby daddy off child support by having him sign over rights? He has other kids that has made it clear he will never be in my son's life and wants nothing to do with him. So if he made that clear, I'll be trying to go up the child support. Oh, that's how you feel? Okay. Yes, your honor, I'm requesting an increase. I'll be trying to up the child support. Me myself personally. But you know, to each their own sister will just weigh it in your spirit with the Lord. Now, Terri's God bless. Just want to say thank you, man of God for your wisdom, teaching and laughter. You have truly been a blessing to me. May God continue to shower blessings over you and your family. A blessing. Now that really means a lot. Let me grab this hill from Kate Johnson because it's gonna disappear on me. Mary, four years we talk about divorce every month for two years straight, but still haven't done it. We now have a five month old. Any advice should we part. Y'all need to get help. You don't need to part, you need to get help. You need to get to some coaching. On my mentor.life we got coaches and lawyers $25 an hour. Get you some coaching. Get you some coaching. You need some new wisdom to apply to the marriage before throwing in the towels. Alexandria, God bless you. Just wanted to show my appreciation to the queen. Thank her for sharing some secrets and a woman's influence and her secret weapon. You, thank you for the consistent content. The knowledge is heard, processed and utilized, tremendous help. God bless Alexandria, God bless you. Now I'm gonna tell you what you need to be doing. You need to be blogging. You need to be blogging and you need to be ghost writing because how you just wrote that right there with that good old English and you dropped some commas in there and you didn't have a single typo in there. That might be one of only a handful of times I'm seeing somebody use commas and not have no typo that I could see. Now you might have a typo in there that ain't catch but right there you need to be blogging. You need to be blogging. You got a gift. You see right there? Chevelle, Gordon, God bless you. Hi Tony, I appreciate your work. Mrs. Wright changed my life. God sent you. I am 27, he is 43. We are in a relationship. We had a very bad argument but he apologized. Now I'm ready to stay off my back. How do I remove? How do I maneuver? I'm gonna tell you what I am. If you don't have a child with him you need to maneuver like this. Gotta go. Gotta go. Tonight. Tonight. That argument y'all had need to be the last argument y'all ever had. This here, this your granddaddy that you dating. You 27, he's 43. Even though it ain't that long I just don't like the way the numbers sit. Two and seven and then four and three it just sound like 83. 27, 43. Four more years, he's 20 years older than you. That's your granddaddy. So how you need to maneuver? Gotta go. Just like that. I'm telling you the last time y'all argued need to be the last conversation y'all have. Sister come on now, you 27. It'll leave. Okay, you want your older man. Okay, 30 years old. Get your 30-year-old. Get your 30-year-old. Why you dating your daddy classmate? You see what I mean? Don't come on now. Come on now, Savelle. Come on now. Y'all can't be on my page. And then be making choices like that now. Come on now, Savelle. Come on now. You go out to the movies with that man your daddy bumping to classmate. What's going on? You see what I'm saying? Can't be out there with your daddy classmate. Surrender God bless her. He is my husband, I know this, but told me to lose his number. That's my phrase, but I ain't never calling him. When he calls, what should I do? Well, Surrender, that's not your husband. Okay, cause your husband will never tell you that. So you need to stop saying that because you blocking your actual husband. So what you should do, move on. Don't call his phone, don't answer his phone when he called, you move on. Cause when a man tell you that, that's fighting word. That's like cursing you out. That's like spitting in your face when he say lose my number. Lose his number. Surrender God bless her. Hey Tony, I had a conversation with my ex and I mentioned I was getting a new phone. He asked me for the phone back. LOL, why? I didn't get mad, just told him no. Well, if he bought the phone, gon' give it to him. If you get a new one, gon' give it to him. Let him have what he want. Don't hold on to him. If he's saying you hold it on to me, gon' give it to him. Gon' give it to him. Let him have everything he brought and everything he gave, that's what he want. Apple helps God bless you. Now, did I say Apple helps? Apple helps. Apple, all right. Okay, all right. Okay, that's like Apple bottles, jeez, boots with the fur. All right, that's my first time seeing that nickname. All right, God bless you. Bill, God bless, thank you, Tony. You are much appreciated and yes, addressed to pain. God bless you now. Let me see this. Well, son, you're blessed, you're blessed, wife. Y'all just give me a breather when y'all send me old blessing. Without a question in, I just, thank you for that little bit of rest. Lord, thank you for the wind beneath my wings. Thank y'all. Seeing quit, God bless you. No question, but enjoying the chat. Every time you go live, I learn a lot. I'm grateful for this platform of your time. God bless you now. I'm trying to just go out at night. K-A, y'all, I got about two more minutes now. I'm trying to get through here. God bless you, K. Sarah, bless you. I feel like my friend and I feel like my friend and boyfriend are a little too friendly. How can I address the issue without sounding crazy jealous? Well, you might need to start hanging out with them at different times. You might need to stop inviting your friend over when you and your boyfriend, you and your boyfriend need to be by yourself. And then stop inviting your friend over. That's first thing, create some distance. Don't always have your boyfriend around your friends. That's one thing my wife never did. Another thing my wife never did, never gave me her friend's number. I never talked to none of her friends. Only time she had probably one friend that would call her and say, hey, can I talk to Tony for some relationship stuff? And she'll be very nearby, but she never, even my wife's sister's, I don't even know if I got my sister-in-law's phone number. Like how a lot of men talk to their sister-in-law, I don't talk to my sister-in-law. My wife ain't never pushed for that. She never encouraged that. And that's one thing that more women need to understand. Don't be bringing all your little friends and all your little sisters because you listen to enough stories. You'll hear a lot of sisters sleeping with their sister husband. Sleeping with their sister-boyfriend now. You seen what Rachel and Leah was doing in the Bible. Y'all better read the Bible. See what Rachel and Leah was doing. Uh, Leah was going over there to see the man. I can't remember the man name. Was it Jacob? And Rachel flattened the woman tires. She went to get in her car, tire flat. Went to get in a carriage, then took the convertible top off the car. Like every single, as you start to read through that Bible, you're gonna see so many women, you're gonna see that combativeness. And so you got to be careful because it's a lot of women that they don't have a man. And if they could get to them and speaking up or speaking of Ratna, I know a woman who was married and now her ex-husband is married to her former best friend. Oh, I'm trying to tell you. Brianna, God bless you. I attracted who I was very disappointed and embarrassed with myself. We worked together and now he's with another coworker and doesn't, who doesn't love herself. How can I move differently to attract better? See, you just got to get the knowledge. It's not about who you attract. It's not about who walks up to you. It's not about who talks to you. It's about who you settle down with. So you just got to get a new knowledge. You just got to get a knowledge of what a real man looks like, what he talk like, what he act like. So you'll recognize the red flags, lovely light. Hey, y'all, all right. Now don't put no more question now. We over an hour now, I got to go. I got to go now. Lord only call me until an hour tonight. All right, y'all, hold your question. Let me finish up these right here. So we could go on, go our separate ways. Man, how somebody do the benediction. Lovely light, God bless you Tony. How can women avoid getting dogged out? I am waiting until marriage and I have been getting this knowledge but I am still cautious. You're doing the right thing. What you're doing is how you avoid getting dogged out cause you're gonna recognize the red flag before it happens. Tony, enjoy the God bless you now. God bless you, healer, bless you. Only one kidney, God bless you. So proud of you Tony. Thank you for everything you do. Just a little love, offer, be blessed. Hey, God bless you now. Barbara, here's another breather. Well, I need to take that, I need to take that breath on that one now. Thank you now, God bless you now. Hold on now, pink elevator, God bless you. All right, now that's the end of the resume now. Pink elevator. Any cave bless you now. We got an argument. I was wrong and so was he. I was more wrong and apologize. How do I fix it? I was extremely over-emotional and a grown girl. You apologize. You apologize and then you change the behavior going forward. The next time that something comes up that can cause a rift, it can cause an argument, you don't let it become an argument. You keep your energy pure and you show him that you learned from the last time and that's really how you change it. That's really how you change it. All right, now, let me see. Lovely light. God bless you, Eloah. Tony, what if your husband insists on hanging out with other married couples but some are recently divorced? Should you all still hang out? Well, if they divorce, then okay, they're not married. So y'all even be hanging out with married couples. You know, if they divorce now, you got to feel their spirit now because if the woman divorce, all right. Now I'm gonna answer a couple of looking for the last two that got a hashtag Q in here. Gotta put hashtag Q before you question. Trace Tess, my man condemns me for repeatedly breaking up with him for small things like him being three hours late to dinner with no call or text. He claims he is not used to that treatment and I run too quick. Well, here's the thing. If you break up with him more than twice, then you play too much and he's not gonna respect you. So you need to be able to check him, call him out on it, give him a chance to see if he gonna do right. And if he keep doing wrong, then you got to leave him for good. But you can't let a man keep trying. You're like boo boo the fool because now it's just, it seemed like a game. All right, last question here from King Vontator. My only man I saw tonight asked a question. What's up King, my girlfriend mentioned that I've been watching too many YouTube videos and I thought about you, LOL. She acknowledges my growth and knowledge. Thank you, King, I appreciate you. She mentioned that you've been watching too many. So what you got to do is watch him when you're not with her. So when you at work, let the videos play. When you riding to work, if y'all not talking, let the video play. When you coming home, let the video play. When your lunch break, if you ain't got to call her, let the video play. So, but when you with her, give her, just give her that time. That's how you gonna handle that right there now. But now, keep growing and let her appreciate that. Hey, thank y'all so much. Let me cut that chat off now and just close up the night because I said I was just doing an hour tonight. Stephanie, Green God bless you now. Now, what I listened to, what I saw the night on here is, it's a lot of y'all ladies that you're allowing what a man says to change the way you see yourself. You're allowing him what he said to change the way you see yourself. You're allowing to affect your self-esteem. Now, what you got to realize moving forward, always just focus on what a man shows you. Only what he shows you, not what he says. See, the good or the bad, not compliments and not criticism should change who you are. Neither compliments nor criticism should change who you are. All you paying attention to is what he does, what your heart can confirm based on his actions. And that's what's gonna let you know who you got. And when you realize and you start to learn what the red flags and what a real man is versus what a grown boy is, you're gonna recognize the red flags a lot sooner and you have to be unapologetic about taking your life from out of his hands and moving on with your life. All right, now, Apple helps. I said, no questions, no more questions. All right, and Apple helps says, you've been a get her a question in, the boots with the fur. Hey, Tony, I asked my ex slash son's father to put together a bike. I got for our son. He said, no, because him and I are not close and he has a girlfriend. He keeps on telling me he has a girlfriend. All right, I see. Okay, well, listen, you need to stop need him. Tina, God bless you. You need to stop need him because y'all are not together. And he has a girlfriend and he let her read the text and he texting you, I got a girlfriend and the get kudos with his ex. Now, you know, everybody phone and everybody city, it's apps that's like thumbtack.com. We got one called Pulse, P-U-L-S.com, homovisor. All these different apps that you could have somebody, if you need a man to come and do something, you could have somebody on the app come right on over there, 25, 50 dollar, yes, money, but it's better than needing your ex. And don't go to your ex, you got an uncle, you got a cousin, you got a male cousin. You know, go to somebody else, your next-door neighbor will do it for you. Or downstairs or upstairs neighbor, whichever they are, they'll do it for you. Now, some men gonna want something in return, Sharon Savage, Lala Lua, God bless you now. All right, some people just coming on and hit a rule. All right, thank y'all for the blessing with y'all. The Bible says, when you give it, it'll be given back to you, press down, shaking together and running over. And y'all really bring that scripture to life for me. I get to see it firsthand at the Lord One Line. Susanna, good man, God bless you. High Tony, great to listen to you in all your great videos. Now, see what I'm gonna do? I got to get off here and go, but I'm gonna do a video because I got to shoot a video. I ain't get no video up to date. And I'm trying to stay consistent because see the way I'm set up, the way my spirit is, is I'm kind of like a Negro spiritual. So it's like, if I don't be consistent with these videos, I go ahead and just call out. I call out of work every day. If I call out the day and I call out tomorrow, I might not even go back to work to the job. And so I'm trying to, y'all see when I'm doing these videos, it's just because I got to be consistent because that's where I struggle with consistency. I struggle with consistency. I worked out for three weeks. The Santas ain't closed down the state because he, so aim into the gym in two or three weeks because the case keep going up. I took that excuse and just rolled right on with it. Up, can't come, up, can't come. But it's really not as much of me scared of that but it's just I'm working on consistency. So see when y'all get these videos every day, that's me trying to develop something in my mindset to be consistent for my next level of success. So I challenge you to evaluate what your weakness is and work on it. So tonight I'm about to do a video right after I hang up. I'm finna do a video and upload it for those of y'all who in another time zone, six hours behind, six hours ahead, three hours behind, you'll still be able to get your video in. The video might be 30 minutes or an hour so if you're on the East Coast, go and go to bed. And I'm gonna do one tomorrow too. But tonight I'm talking about toxic family on the video. But God bless y'all and we'll talk soon. Let me see now. Let me see. I'm gonna end this thing. God bless y'all. Let me see now. Okay, that thing disappeared on me now. All right now.