 Lux presents Hollywood. Lux Radio Theatre brings you Gloria Jean, Nan Gray, Robert Cummings, C. Aubrey Smith, and Bueller Bondi in the underpub. Ladies and gentlemen, your producer, Mr. Cecil B. DeMille. Greetings from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. Either I'm getting older or screen stars are getting younger. I can remember thinking that Mary Pickwood was very young and very tiny indeed for such a big star. But tonight we have a brand new star who's just as tiny and was 12 years old yesterday. Gloria Jean, who makes her debut in the Lux Radio Theatre tonight as the underpup. The discovery of a new star is good news for all producers. The word traveled quickly when Universal and Joe Pasternak gave the underpup to the screen. With Gloria, the picture starred Nan Gray, Robert Cummings, C. Aubrey Smith, and Bueller Bondi. And we have all of them in our production tonight. Something old and something new makes a good combination. Gloria Jean in the Lux Radio Theatre is something new. And Lux Toiletsope is an old friend in millions of homes. In fact, when beauty takes a bow, look for Lux Toiletsope as one of the artists behind the scenes. The underpup is the story of Pip Emma, quite a bit wiser than her 12 years. And with a great talent for arranging things, nothing is too complicated for Pip Emma to arrange. If a certain family has a little domestic trouble, she can take care of it. If romance needs a helping hand, Pip Emma is on the spot. If pride needs to take a tumble, she's there to trip it. In fact, what this world needs is a few more Pip Emma's. And economically, I suppose we can call this young lady underprivileged, kind of an underpup. But it doesn't lessen her confidence in herself or the world. And she faces that world with a song, more than one song, during the course of tonight's play. And in these melodies, you'll hear the refreshing young voice of Gloria Jean, who sings and plays the part of the underpup. In typical Pip Emma style, Gloria thought she was going to get out of school this week. Regretfully, we had to arrange rehearsals so she didn't. But she's all smiles now, as our curtain goes up on the first act of the underpup. Starring Gloria Jean as Pip Emma, Nan Gray as Priscilla Adams, Robert Cummings as Dennis, C. Aubrey Smith as Pip Emma's grandfather, and Bula Bundy as Miss Thornton. New York City on a fresh summer Sunday morning. In an old declining neighborhood, a Sunday school service is coming to an end in the basement of the church. Happily sings the final hymn, while from his place on the platform, the beaming superintendent nods benignly to his youthful charges, with a special smile for Pip Emma Bins, the choir soloist. Thank you, children, and thank you, Emma. That's all right. Good morning, Mr. Wendelhead. Please, I have wonderful news for you. Children, I'd like to introduce our honored guest, Mrs. Delphine Thornton. Miss... Miss Thornton is in charge of New York's most exclusive summer camp for girls, and, well, perhaps we'd better let Miss Thornton tell you. Miss Thornton. Thank you very much, Mr. Wendelhead and children. It was such a pleasure to come here this morning, see your smiling faces and hear your lovely voices. Now, little girls, there's one of you here today who will benefit through the kindness of the penwinds. The penwinds is a club composed of more fortunate little girls, but of your own ages, you understand. They sponsor a summer camp, and this year they've decided to invite one of you as their guest for six weeks. There, isn't that wonderful news, children? Such a beautiful place it is, too, with running streams, green forests, and soft winds blowing through the branches. To be fair, the penwinds decided on a contest to determine the winner. The winner being the one who writes the best essay on trees. Please send your manuscripts as early as possible to Mr. Wendelhead. So, thank you very, very much. Oh, excuse me, I've got to go home. Mom, hello, dear. Hello, Onion. Hello, Pip Emma. Quit calling your father Onion. Okay, sweet potato. How was your singing? Oh, okay. Hello, Uncle Dan. What are you doing? Shell game, child, shell game. The purpose of this highly entertaining, mystifying, ancient game is to pick the shed you think the pea is under. Now, there it is. Yes. Watch closely, child. Watch closely. Hippity hop and hippity he hither and thither and where's the pea? Right there, Uncle Dan. Where? Under this shell? It ain't under any shell. Oh, it ain't. It's right there in between your fingers where you palm this. Where's Grandpa? Now, he's in his bedroom, mending his cane. He busted it over the Grossman's head while you were in Sunday school. Hello, Grandpa. Well, how'd your buster cane this time? Crazy fools, killing folks with 13 stripes in the flags. Bad luck. That's the sixth cane you've busted this week, Grandpa. It ain't done either. It's the seventh. Sit down, Grandpa. I got big business to talk with you. Off a big business. Now. Now what? Grandpa, am I the bestest? I ain't got any money. Oh, no, no, no. Change that. Huh? Have I been good enough this week to ask a favor? Hand me my calendar. It's the Monday oak, Tuesday oak, Wednesday oak, and Thursday... But it wasn't her dog in the first place. Anyway, I didn't tie the tin can on very tight. No, maybe not. And he didn't fit when I asked you. Well, all right. What do you want? I got to write an essay on trees, and I figured... Well, I figured... That I could write it, eh? Well, sorta. I figured if you wrote it, I couldn't lose. Well, what's it for? The first prize. A vacation in the mountains. Mountains? No, you'll fall off of one and break your neck. But, Grandpa, I was figuring on you. Nothing to it. Oh, you can snivel if you want to. Blubber up, I don't care. Anyway, it'll be cheating if I wrote it. But Uncle Dan says cheating is wrong if you only get caught at it. Now, don't you pay no attention to your Uncle Dan. He's a crook. I know it, but I wish... No, mountains. Absolutely. I don't care what you say. I say no. Get him out of your system, because he ain't going to no mountain. No mountain. That one, Mom. Do you like that one, Tabemma? Tonight, I don't like anything. Oh, well, it's about time we were getting off to bed anyway. No. Yeah, it's pretty soon-less. Get in late. No one's satisfied around here. Always have to be picking on me. What do they care? They don't want to see no trees or things. I hope I grow up to be so ugly people stay in their houses at night just because they're afraid of my face. What's that? You wait. When I grow up and be a singer, I'll bet I'll never go to bed. Not when I sing, I won't. Well, why don't you sing, Tabemma? Well, for you, Grandpa, I will. That's the gal. Pinting up to heaven, singing for joy in the breezes and praying there thanks to him for being alive. Oh, that's swell, Grandpa. Gee, that's swell. Give me your pencil. Now, let's see. Do you spell heaven with a capital H? Huh? What? Oh, no. I'll wait a bit with you, my lassie. Bless Mom, and Pop, and Grandpa, and my uncles as follows. Dan, Ed, Jack, Bert, Mike, Wes, Fiss, people we Freddy and Sher. And please take good care of everybody while I'm gone. Maybe when you look at my essay first off, it does seem a little like cheating, but it isn't. That is, not exactly. They said write an essay, and I did. I did the writing myself. Grandpa only made up the... Well, I tried as hard as I could, honestly. I want to go, I do, but... I can't write about trees. I can't describe trees. I've never seen any. Amen. Miss Thornton, will you select one? This is next, Priscilla. What's this? I can't describe trees. I've never seen any. I don't know, girls. It's your camp counselor. I suggest you give this one a little thought. What do you think, Cecilia? It's obviously meant to impress us. How do you know that? Silly thing I've ever heard of, Janet. Oh, wait, Letty Lou. That's the whole plan, isn't it, Cecilia? To give some little poor girl a nice vacation. This isn't long enough, Janet. We didn't say how long it had to be. Anybody with common sense ought to know an essay has to be ten words or more. Don't be picky, Cecilia. She sounds like a nice little girl. And as president of the penguins, I think you ought to call a vote. Well, I suppose we have to vote for someone. Penguins, the essay has been duly read and considered. All those in favor of this essay say, I. I. Write a letter to the girl, Miss Thornton. Tell her to meet us at the train. Pippema bin. Pippema? I thought it was just amulbins. No. You see, before I was born, my grandfather used to be an English army. And anything happened afternoon, it's P.M., you know. P.M. is Pippema. So when I was born the afternoon, my grandfather said I ought to be called Pippema. Get it? How amusing. Ain't it funny? Say, that's a beautiful uniform you got on. What have them do dads on your arm for? I'm president of the Purple Order of Penguins and chairman of the Board of Mystics. Gee, I think uniforms are swell. I can't quite like it up to the cap and put mine on. But you won't wear a uniform. Why? Well, you're only a guest and besides... Besides what? Well, the penguins are very exclusive and besides, we have to be duly nominated. Oh. What is those? Pictures of my uncles, all of them. Yeah, I got Levin. He's won a grandpa. Of course, his head's a little blurred. We talk of it, told him to hold still, but he didn't know grandpa. He's won a Uncle Ed. He's with the circus. See his uniform? A lion tamer? No, he just cleans out the cage. Have you any more? Sure, lots of them. My uncles all got jobs with uniforms. He's won a Uncle Bert. He's a mounted policeman. Do you mind if I show them to the girls? You mean they'd like to see him? They'd love to. Well, sure. Here, take them. All of them. Thanks. How priceless. Hello, Pippema. My name's Janet Cooper. Hello. What's so funny over there? Oh, they're just jealous because their mothers and fathers and uncles and grandpa didn't come down to the train like yours did. Their mothers have rich dates on Mondays. Teeth? Teeth? Oh, no. Cards, I mean. They play for five cents a point. Funny about my uncles. I'll bet you if I hadn't... Yes, Miss Adams? Sit down, Pippema, beside me. I... I don't think you'll need your gang. The girls are bound like you. Oh, I see. You don't like me either. That ain't so. I do like you. But you don't know me any more than you do them. You're different. You're warm inside. Warm? Uh-huh. Like fresh baked bread. The mom says when people like fresh baked bread, they're awful good. You married? Married? No, I'm not married. That's fierce bad. Fierce bad? Why? My grandpa knows everything and what he knows I know. And he says that women are taking men's jobs of the single kind I mean. And he says they should be married. I guess the right one hasn't asked me yet. He will. If he don't, he's a chump. Look, I think you and I like each other after all. I also think that if you joined the girls and perhaps showed the many games you might know, they'd like you just as much as I do. Yeah, but I don't... Wait a minute. I got an idea. The purpose of this highly entertaining, main and mystifying ancient game is to fix the shell you think the pea is under. What do you bet? My bracelet. That it's under that one. It's this one. It's under that one. There we go. Hippity hop and hippity hee. Hither and thither and where's the pea? Right there. Ha ha, the little lady misses. Thank you very much. And here we go again. Hootin' and tootin' and nursemaid's knees. Sprinkle the spragil and where's the pea? You wouldn't want me to be a murderer, would you? Of what? Hello, Priscilla. Hello, Dennis. A murderer. Five little mountain life cubs all in a row. One, two, three, four, five. Right across the road. She sees me coming. She's helpless. Her eyes are big and filled with tears. She waves her tail frantically. My bus speeds closer and closer and closer. Will I stop the bus in time? Can I stop the bus in time? Do I close my eyes helplessly? Oh, no. No, not Dennis Lane. He's made of sterner stuff. I grab the jeep. I put the bustle lift and shut off the mugwumpers. Screech bang! The bus comes to a stop. And what do you think happened? What do you think? You overslept. How do you know? You're simply impossible. Well, that's what I get for being dumb to kind animals. Girls are just as big a liar as ever. Who, me? Not good at anything. I thought you weren't coming back this year. Well, I heard you were going to be here and I thought I'd better, Prissy. Don't call me Prissy. Okay, okay. Get in the bus, Prissy. I'll grab the bag. Yes, and hurry, please. There are too many bags here to hurry. Why don't you pick them up? One, two, three, four. Oh, another wise guy, huh? Not me, partner. I think you're as good at telling stories as you're all playing football. Well, you know me, huh? Sure. My grandpa takes me to all the professional games. Is it why? I'd like to meet your grandpa sometime. No, you wouldn't. It's not after that club play you pulled against the Black Hawks. I had to hold them to keep them running down on the field and conk in you with this cane. Oh, yeah. You mean that 7-3 thing? Boy, do you know. You've got Shriver and Malfoy, his eligible pass receivers, but does that mean anything to you? No. Oh, you're nuts. I pulled that around then because I figured that... And the fourth down. All right, all right. Is it my fault if Collins doesn't take out his man besides? Hogi snaps the ball to me low. I scoop it up and pivot and Spiff hits me hip high. Saunders? Yeah, Saunders. I'm just a... Say, who are you? I'm Pipp. Hi, Dennis. Well, here's the way it was, Pipp. I shake myself loose, see? And I'm heading down the road. That's the first day. The house is big and pretty, is that one? Well, oh, but we don't live in the house, Pipp Emma, unless it rains. We live in those tents over there. Oh, you do? Yes. And we wash our own dishes, make up our beds, and... What's the matter? That's what I do at home. That ain't no fun. Gee, I'm sorry. Oh, that's all right, Janet. Pipp Emma. Hello, Miss Adams. Pipp Emma, Miss Thornton, and I would like to see you in the office. Me? Now? Yes, you can look around the camp later. Okay. Bye, Janet. See you after a while. Sure. Janet? Janet, where are they going? To see Miss Thornton. What for? I don't know, Letty Lou. I wonder if it was because of that Walnut Shell game she showed us. I don't think it was honest. I won. No one else did, though. She's nothing but a gutter snob. She isn't either. Never mind, Letty Lou. If there is something seriously wrong with her, we owe it to our social conscience to correct it. Well, she gives me a pain. Nobody likes her, and they're afraid to say so. I like her, and I'm not afraid to say so. You would. You'd like anybody after the way your father and mother treat you. I don't care. And if you're Letty Lou, dare do anything to her. I'll never forgive you. Never! Talk over a very serious matter concerning you, Pipp Emma. I don't know what you mean. Pipp Emma, it's about the gambling you introduced on the train coming up here. Well, I wasn't the only one. You can't gamble alone. Besides their mother's gamble, they said so. But perhaps they don't cheat. There's a difference, you know. Sure, gambling is inexcusable, even for older people. No doubt you've been influenced by members of your family, and I regret it very much. I expect you to return all the jewelry you won immediately. But they were mean to me. Pipp Emma, can you say girls are mean who use their spending money to pay for your trip to the camp? You mean they did it themselves? For me? Exactly. Now aren't you ashamed of yourself? Yes, I am. You'll go right now and give it back to them. Yes, I am. I'm sorry. I think you were a little too stern, Miss Thornton. I don't. No use wasting your time on a girl like that. It wouldn't do one bit of good. I think it would. I think Pipp Emma's worth a lot of anyone's time. You'd better hurry then, for I have a feeling she won't be here very long. Just a moment, our stars Gloria Jean, Nan Gray, Bula Bondi, Robert Cummings, and C. Aubrey Smith will return in act two of the underpup. Now, let's imagine that we're in a colleague's dormitory. Darkest Mumbai! That's a cool game. It's exciting. I'll say it was. It was a toddler last five minutes. And it was Dick who saved the game. Oh, you should have seen him. Dick? Oh, ah, come on girls. Betty's been studying all evening. She doesn't want to hear us chatter. Come on, it's bedtime. Gosh, Sue, you shouldn't have mentioned Dick to Betty. Don't you know she's low as a rug because he didn't answer to the game? Oh gee, I'm sorry. I forgot. What's the matter with poor old Betty? What's the matter with her complexion? Hmm, I think you've got something there, Sue. She used to have lovely skin, but lately we ought to tell her about active lather facials. Well, tactfully, you know. That's a wonderful idea. Ugh, let's talk it over more tomorrow. Right now I've got to get busy on my active lather facial. You give the signal, Sue. Okay, the luck soap is yours. One, work up the rich active lather in your hands and pat it lightly in. Two, rinse with warm water and then a dash of cool. Three, pat your face dry. Pat, pat, pat. Ah, thanks, old girl. Now it's your turn. No cosmetic skin for us. No, sir. Oh, in the morning we'll just have to dream up a way to put poor little Betty wise. You know it's a shame when a girl whose complexion ought to be smooth and attractive fails to remove cosmetics, dust and dirt thoroughly. Let's cosmetic skin develop. Those unsightly little blemishes and coarse and pores spoil any woman's good looks. Now you can use cosmetics all you like. Gene and Sue have shown you how to give your skin protection it needs. The active lather of gentle luck-toilet soap does a thorough job. Helps you keep skin smooth and soft. Lovely to look at? Smooth to touch. Get three cakes of luck-toilet soap and begin your active lather beauty care tomorrow. Now our producer, Mr. DeMille. Act two of the underpup. Starring Gloria Jean as Pip Emma, Nan Gray as Priscilla, Robert Cummings as Dennis, C. Aubrey Smith as Pip Emma's grandfather, and Bula Bondi as Miss Thornton. For Pip Emma Bins, the first two days at Camp Happy Warrior, have been warlike but not happy. With the exception of Miss Priscilla Adams and little Janet Cooper, she's been completely ignored. As Priscilla puts it, Pip Emma is not of the privileged class. Now deep in the woods, the penguins are having a picnic after a morning's hike. Apart from the girls, Priscilla and Dennis enjoy their lunch and each other's company in private. Oh, look at them. Oh, Prissy, it's a shame the way they treat that Pip Emma kid. No one will even sit with her except what's her name there? The Cooper Million, which is rather ironic. Yeah, Janet. Oh, it's a crime the way the rest up and treat her. Oh, it isn't as serious as that. She'll get along. And that Thornton name, balling her out on the very first day. And no uniform. I bet the kid's tongue's hanging out for one. You'd know all about uniforms, of course. Sure, you think I'd play football in a bathrobe? You'd play football in a beard. And where's it getting you? Oh, so we're on that again, huh? Will you ask for it? What do you want me to do? Give up my living? How can we get married if I haven't got a job? You said anything about getting married. I did. Oh, now look, Prissy. Here's the way it is. Watch, Janet. Here's a ladybug. Ladybug, ladybug. Fly away home. Wish mom and pop were here. Your house is on fire and your children are gone. See? See your girl? Pip Emma, huh? Pip Emma. You like uniforms, don't you? All my life. My family, too. They only get jobs where they can wear uniforms if they can get jobs. You want to wear my coat a little while? Gee, that'd be great. They can't see us from here. Let me help you. It'll fit. Do you think? You could wear it all the time only. You know secret societies. They have to have rules. Yeah, I know. Hotzy, totzy, boy, oh boy. My pop had a coat like this once when he belonged to the Knights of the No One Circle. Doesn't he belong to it now? No. The cops broke it up for some lottery tickets. This is sure keen. Does your father tell you everything? Everything he knows. So does mom and Uncle Dan and Grandpa. I wish mine did. But parents always do. Mine don't. They sure must be funny, then. Well, they're not together. I mean, they don't live together very often. Why not? Because they get mad at each other and it might be a long time before they get glad again, so they move. It's ever so complicated. My mom and pop get mad sometimes. Mom says you can't stay mad very long in two rooms. I wish we lived in two rooms. Maybe you might tell them so. I'd be too scared. I shouldn't be scared to tell you folks anything. That's what grandpa says. I'd even thought of running away, but I'm afraid of gypsies. And if I did, everybody knows everybody else. And sooner or later, they'd find me and shame mom and daddy and talk to them like Letty Lou talked to me. And I just... I try awfully hard. I do. Josh, you mustn't. Pigmen don't cry. Oh, don't, Janet. Don't. I've never stopped before that time. Now, who will it be? Can anyone else do a stunt? Well, I can sing a little. That's enough, please. Pippenma, come over here. I can sing a little. She says she. A little is probably right. Pippenma, don't. It was lovely. All right, Penguins. Everybody to bed. Taps in ten minutes. I was going to tell you I wasn't having a good time up here. But after thinking that Janet told me about her mom and pop, I guess maybe you better talk me out of it. Oh, would you please fix it so they can live in two rooms? Bless my mom and pop and grandpa and my uncle to spoil him. Dan is Janet. This letter from? It was from anyone else but my brother. I wouldn't tell you. There's going to be some censoring done around here. Okay, girls. Janet Cooper, Pippenma Bins. Two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Is all this for you? Nine, ten? Say there aren't any circuiters either. You're not doing so well, are you? No. I guess maybe Uncle Mike is too busy right now. Oh, well that's all girls. See you same time, same station tomorrow. No, I'm sorry there isn't much time. Well, my mother and father aren't coming up. Did you ask her? I told them about the swimming races we're going to have and I was hoping maybe when we have them they could have come up and maybe if I could win. Oh, but I couldn't. You can too. But if I could win, maybe they'd be so proud they would win a divorce and we could be happy like your folks, I mean. You're going to get a divorce? Yes. Well, don't worry. My grandson can fix that. How? I don't know, but he can fix anything. Where's that letter? Oh, I dropped it, I guess. I better look for it. What's the big idea? Let him lose, read to your letter. Come on. Okay, that's all right. Don't you dare read her letter. Give me it. I will not. I guess to see you and I have a right to read something we found. This isn't any of your business. I'm making it my business. Give it to me or I'll sock you. You what? You don't dare. Who do you think you're talking to? I'm Cecilia Layton. And I'm Pip Emma Bins. And give me that letter all flattened out like a carpet. Gimme. Get away from me. When you did that, Letty Lou, you were just begging for it. How dare? Shame, Pip Emma. Here's your letter, Janet. Shame on you for the horrible thing to do. She started at Miss Thornton. I saw it all. You will both come to my office immediately. Beyond you, Pip Emma, I'm merely asking that you apologize to Letty Lou. I wasn't doing all the fighting and they were reading a letter that didn't belong to them. You weren't either reading it. Never mind. This isn't the first bad manners you've displayed, Pip Emma. Your actions, since you've been here, are simply beyond comprehension. You've made everybody miserable. I'll bet if it was your letter they were reading, you'd bang him a couple. That doesn't enter into this. Well, I'm not going to apologize. Will you force me to take extreme measures? Pip Emma. Yes, Miss Adams? I think you were wrong in fighting, no matter what reason you had. I wish I'd say you're sorry. You... You think I'm wrong? Yes. I'm... I'm sorry, Letty Lou. I'm sorry I popped you on the snout. I'll never forgive you. Never, never. But I'm sorry anyway. So long. Wait, Pip Emma. Pip Emma. Yes? Thank you. For what? Being the biggest person in the room. Oh, I hate her. But Letty Lou isn't... I don't mean her. I mean that old grouch bag. Miss Thornton's a good woman. Yeah, sure. But she is. Something's wrong with her. You don't even get any letters all the time. Did you stop to think there's no one to write her letters? She's all alone in the world. You see, you wouldn't understand that because you've got people who love you. Lots of people. I don't get it. You mean she's never had anybody? She's never had any letters? Or anything? No. And no one's ever loved her? I don't think so. Is she still in her office? She should be. Excuse me. Well? Miss Thornton, I'm sorry. Well, I should think you would be. When I'm sorry back home, I usually kiss somebody. There. Pip Emma. Yes, sir? Please come back. Yes, sir? You are the first little girl that has ever kissed me. Yes, sir? Oh, Pip Emma. Pip Emma. So yet why she sent all those stamps? Fourteen stamps? What for, Grandpa? Will you wait till I'm through reading the letter? Interrupting fool. Dear mom and pop and grandpa and uncle, this is to let you know and so forth and so forth. And Miss Thornton is very lonely and no one loves her. And I thought maybe all of you would write her letters using these stamps. That's what the stamps are for. What, to write that old maid a letter? I sure. It would be just like she had a family or something and then she would be happy like other people. The poor thing. Yeah, but what's a guy going to write to an old maid? You might tell her about the time you forgot to farm the pea and lost ten dollars. Oh. Now, Grandpa, the following is something awful serious. Janet Cooper is a gal here and Janet's mother and her father are going to have a divorce and Janet cries about it all the time. The lawyers say that Janet will have to live with her governess in Florida for a while. So I was thinking maybe if you could fix it so that they wouldn't get a divorce and be happy like mom and papa sometimes. Divorce, eh? Too bad, too bad. She wants you to fix it. Eh, Park Avenue and... Where you going, Grandpa? Just for a walk. Anybody seen my cane? Quiet for just a few seconds. Will you? Quiet! Now remember everyone who's going in this swimming race has to put her application in now. For those of his parents who will be here, see me later about tickets. Now, applications. Cecilia, you're in, of course. I wouldn't miss it. Uh, Letty Lou? No, Serene. I'm Cecilia's coach. All right. And Mary? Oh, you're okay, aren't you? Sure, I'm all right. And Pauline? Yeah, me too. Let's see, who else? Janet, how about you? I can't. I can't. Well, I've got five names at her now. Anybody else? Janet, she's going to race. That's not your job. Oh, yes it is. I'm her coach. Who do you think you are anyway? You got ears, ain't you? Why don't you talk to me like that? You, you... You what? You pimp animal. What a name. No worse than yours. Wouldn't want people to call me silly or sissy. How dare you! I'll go wash her name. Now, here, here. You two cut that out, would you? But she's in. Janet's in. Ain't she, Janet? Sure, all signed and sealed, Janet. Come over here. What if we got to do something, buddy? We're the privileged class. We're not going to let her run this camp. Why don't you call a meeting with a penguin? You're the president. That's what we'll do. We'll hold a meeting and send that pimp animal back so fast or he'll swim. Close the sacred portals and let no mortal, lest she be a penguin, enter the purple chamber of mystery. And now that we have emerged from the darkness, be seated. And now, penguin on the left flank, you may read the charges. The latest charges have been brought against one fifth of them. We have met to consider them. And pass judgment. One, she put popcorn in Claudine's vest. Did it hurt, wing member? It so states. Proceed, penguin on the left flank. Two, she complained about the food. Said that anybody who didn't like fire potatoes and onions was cracked. But now comes the worst of all. She wore Janet's uniform when she thought nobody was looking. That penguin's is unforgivable. And Janet let her too. We'll take care of her later. Let's vote. All having duly heard the charges, we shall now vote. All those in favor of sending Pippema home, say aye. Aye. The vote has been carried. She shall know the will of the purple order of mystics. Pippema will leave our mitts as soon as we can arrange it with our folks. After a short intermission, our stars Gloria Jean, Nan Gray, Robert Cummings, Dula Bondi and C. Aubrey Smith will return in Act 3 of our play, The Underpup. Hello, Mr. Roy. Well, hello! Well, if I'm not glad to see you back again and all your little friends, one, two, three, four, five, and you make six. Well, sir, you're all here and I'd say better looking than ever. Thank you, Mr. Roy. Yes, indeed, girls, you're all looking very beautiful. But as I remember it, when you were here two weeks ago, you were symbols, not just six pretty girls. You're symbols, you stand for something. Yes, sir. We stand for the special qualities of Lux's toilet soap. Oh, I remember. And you want to tell our audience what they are. All right, then. Make it nice and snappy, girls. I stand for my little man. Now, wait a minute, girls, one at a time, please. You, you first, please. I stand for Lux's soap's mildness. It's gentle enough even for delicate skin. And I stand for Lux's soap's purity. That means only the finest ingredients are used to make it. And I stand for Lux's soap's whiteness that makes housekeepers proud to have it in their bathroom. All right, girls, but not too fast. You know, we really want to hear you. Now, you, with the nice red hair. Well, I stand for active lather. It does a thorough job that makes Lux's soap such a wonderful protection to the skin. That's why it's the soap nine out of ten screen stars used. And I stand for the Lux soap perfume that's delicate and distinctive. And now that quiet little girl over there. Last, but not least. I stand for the long-lasting quality of Lux's soap. That makes it economical. The soap that careful housekeepers buy three cakes at a time. Thank you, girls. Thank you very much. You know, I don't want to flatter you, but you six girls certainly do a wonderful job as symbols of Lux's toilet soap qualities. For after all, Lux's toilet soap is a beauty soap. The soap that's used in Hollywood by nine out of ten of the beautiful stars who were famous all over the world. And Lux's toilet soap is used by lovely women, clever women everywhere who value it for the wonderful beauty aid it is. Thank you, girls, and goodbye. Goodbye. We pause now for station identification. This is the Columbia Broadcasting System. It rises on the third act of the underpup. It's the day before the big swimming race. And though the sun is out and the skies are clear blue, the storm is brewing on all sides around the innocent head of little Pip Emma Bin. Pip Emma? Pip Emma? Yes, Miss Adam? Oh, Pip Emma. What did you write to your grandfather? Oh, you mean about Janet? Yes, do you know they're here? Janet's mother and father. They think that Janet's sick. Sick? Oh, I guess Grandpa made a mistake. I guess he did. Miss Thornton wants to see you. Yeah, I kind of thought she might. Why did you do it, Pip Emma? Well, Janet, she's little. And her folks don't love her. And I thought of, maybe if they could see her win the swimming race, well... But you're only making it harder for Janet. Nobody can beat Cecilia. Oh, but Janet's got to win. She wins. I hope she does, Pip Emma. You'd better go into Miss Thornton now. Yes, Miss. Yes, Miss. I... I have a letter here. Letter? Yes, listen. When I was working the Ringling Brothers show, I met a fellow in Terre Haute with three thumbs. So I says to myself... Uncle Dan. Yes. And here's one from your mother, your father, Uncle George and Uncle Mike. All letters to me. Oh, Pip Emma, you don't know what you've done for me. I... I never thought there were such good people in the world. Oh, gee. And you're not mad about what Grandpa told the Cooperants? No, I am not. They gave them a good scare and they needed it. They've gone now to find Janet, together. We're going to get a divorce, Pip Emma. We're always going to be together, just like your family's always together. Oh, gee, I could cry. Listen, Janet, this is no time for sediment. You've got to think about winning that race tomorrow. Now, come on and practice. All right, but they're staying over, did I tell you? They're going to be here for the ice cream party tonight and everything. All the other parents are going to be here too. Oh, Pip Emma, I'm so proud. Gee, the party. I promised Miss Adams I'd work up a number. Listen, you swim and I'll sing. We both need to practice. Dive. Don't rain me for so long. Janet was practicing this morning and beat your time over to the island by 30 seconds. What? Pip Emma's been coaching her. What are we going to do? I'll fix it. Give me that ice cream. Put them out with it. He put on. What for? You'll see. Get another plate of ice cream. Quick, let it in. Okay. You want me? Look, Janet. I'm awfully sorry for some of the things I've said to you. I guess it's because I'm so hot-tempered, because way down deep I've always liked you. Well, thanks to see you. Gee, I've always liked you. I've saved some of the ice cream that I was going to eat myself, but I'd rather you had it. It's nice of you to see and chocolate's my favorite, but I'm not supposed to eat any. Looks awful good. My athletes always eat ice cream before a big race. It's the best thing in the world for you. Is it? Oh, get out of here, Janet. Oh, but I- I'm your coach, now scram. Yes, but- Scram. All right. So ice cream's good for athletes. You dirty little alley rat. Sit down. Eat it. But I can't. I have to swim tomorrow. So does Janet. But you wanted her to eat it. You can't talk to me like this. No. Well, let me tell you something. I got uncles you never heard about. Grassland uncles, soldier uncles. And I got a couple in the jug. Now eat that or I'll mix them all up and give you plenty. But Janet is a- Never mind about Janet. You hurry up and start eating that. If anything happens to me, I ain't guaranteeing anything. But eat it. Eat it before I stuff it down your throat. I go back to football in the fall. You come to all the games. How's it sound so far? Carable. Well, then at the end of the season I resign. Oh, in the meantime, I've saved up a lot of money. I almost forgot that. Go on. And then I say, um, would you marry me, Prissy? And what do I say? You say, uh, don't call me Prissy. Yes, I will. See, it's simple, isn't it? Oh, Janet. Oh, Priscilla. Hey! Well, Pip Emma, what are you doing out of bed? Hello, Pip Emma. Hello. I couldn't sleep. Miss Adam, I gotta ask you something. What is it, Pip Emma? Would a person who ate a lot of ice cream die or something? Well, gosh, how much ice cream? Oh, just a quarter, too. Well, I don't think so. Who did it? Shh. It's a secret. Good night. Oh, Dennis. Huh? Good luck. Keep pitching. Thanks. She poisoned me. That's right. I saw the whole thing. I only done what you were going to do to Janice. You voted me out? Yes, we did. I tried to make it for the race, but I had to stop for an argument with you, fella. Oh, grandpa. I'm so glad to see you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's all this, eh? What's that grip there? I was just going to the train. I want to go home, grandpa. I want to go home with you and Mom and Dad, Uncle Mike and Uncle Dan. Oh, something going wrong, eh? The cars have been stacked against me. They don't want me, except maybe Janice. They think I'm no good enough. I stood it as long as I can. Now, if anybody around here thinks they can... That's the trouble. They don't think. All right, my lass. Come along. We don't need them. Come on. Janet won the race, eh? I don't care. I'd like to have seen that. That makes her president of the penguins for next year. I'm glad she beats Cecilia. And I don't care if I never come back to a place like this. Sure, sure, lass. What have they got that we ain't got? Trees and birds? Sure. But you can see them in the park any old day. And I can take you to the zoo and show you a fish that wouldn't be caught dead open these streams. You got nothing to worry about, lass. You was being fair and honest. And when you like that, you never get indigestion and misery pains. Oh! Look at that tree. My gum you show could make a lot of canes out of that tree. Yes, sir. Grandpa. All right. I guess maybe I wasn't fair. Huh? I guess I'd better tell you. I made Cecilia eat a whole mess of ice cream just before the race, so she'd get cramps. But she was going to give it to Janet. You're a crook. You're a crook just like your Uncle Dan. I'm ashamed of you. And I'm going to be ashamed of you till you go back and tell them how sorry you are. I'm not going back, and I'm not sorry. Oh. All right, people. Here's where you and me part company. I've been hankering for many years to go out west, and that's where I'm going. I'm going out there to start life all over again. No, Grandpa. Goodbye, Pippa Mac, and give my love to the family. Wait, Grandpa. Please don't go. Oh, please don't go out west. That's right where I'm heading. But I don't want you to, Grandpa. I love you, Grandpa. I love you all for much. I love you better than anything in this whole world. Ah, people that love ain't afraid to take the blame for something they've done and say they're sorry. No, I'm going west. I'll go back, Grandpa. I'll go back right now. Oh, don't go, Grandpa. Please don't go. Ah, come on then, lass, and get your conscience all clear again. Well, Mr. Layton, I find no signs at all of poisoning. Just an old-fashioned belly ache. I thought that was it. I'm inclined to think that the spanking you gave her was better than any medicine I could have prescribed. Goodbye, sir. Goodbye, Doctor. I'm sorry we had to tell you about Cecilia, Mr. Layton, but I felt you'd want to know. Oh, you don't have to be sorry. You see, perhaps this whole thing will cure her selfishness and, well, confidentially, I didn't spank her very hard either. Pip Emma. All right, now come on. Tell them what you're here for. Miss Adams, I didn't do it on purpose. I didn't. She was trying to give the ice cream to Janet and I couldn't stand her cheating. Two wrongs don't make a right. Tell her you're sorry and let's get going. Oh, just a minute. Come here. Are you Pip Emma? Yes, sir. And am I to take it you like Janet better than Cecilia? Yes, sir. Any particular reason? Yes, sir. I think it's because I don't like Cecilia. Oh, you don't? I see. And why? Because she's, well, because she's snooty. Oh. And you are here to tell her that? No, sir. I'm here because I'm sad about it inside and maybe she's not to blame. I think maybe she's not. I think maybe it's her father's fault. He probably just didn't bring her up right. Oh, I see. But she'll be all right, won't she, Doctor? Doctor? Oh, no, I... I'm not her doctor. You see, I'm her father. Oh, this is Mr. Layton, Pip Emma. How'd you do it? Let's get out of here, Grandpa. Oh, no, you don't. You still got some toll apologizing to do. Oh, no. Not to me, she hasn't. You know, I think you're the doctor, Pip Emma. Suppose you go in and see Sissy. Yes, sir. You know, Layton, you're all right for a fellow with a lot of money. Thank you. Hello. Oh, I'm awful sorry. You're sick. Yes, you are. I'm sorry. And when I say I'm sorry, I mean I'm sorry. If I die, I'll bet you'll be more than sorry. I don't want you to die, Sissy. Honest, I don't. You're mean. That's what you are. If I wasn't dying, I'd slap your face. You do and I'll call you silly Sissy the rest of your life. Okay, Emma. I am sorry. So am I. I wish we could start all over life. We can, can't we? Sure. Sure we can. We initiate into the purple chamber of mystery. All penguins remain standing until the initiate is bought before the sacred altar. Penguin of the left flank, read the resolution. Be it here resolved, and at a special meeting called, Pipp Emma Bins was unanimously elected to the purple order of penguins. So be it. Remove the mask of darkness, Exalted One. I'm happy for you, Pipp Emma. I want to congratulate you. Curtain falls on the complete triumph of Pipp Emma. And here she is again as Gloria Jean, back at the microphone with Nan Gray, Robert Cummings, C. Aubrey Smith, and Bula Bondi. Hello. Hello yourself. You certainly got that over quick. I'd like the Lux Radio Theatre, Gloria. Well, Bob. Slang, Gloria, slang. Say you enjoyed it. Oh, it was great, but not swell. Mr. Smith is right, Gloria. No, it was swell, wasn't it, Nan? I guess it was, Gloria. And that's a good word for luck soap, too. I think it's a grand complexion care, and I use it all the time. You see, luck soap leaves your skin feeling so soft and smooth that, honey, you just know it's right for your complexion. See, I like luck soap, too, Mr. DeMille. In fact, I think it's... Careful, Gloria. Don't hit C. Aubrey Smith in that sensitive spot again. All right, C.B., it wouldn't be Cricket. Confidentially, in spite of the slang, we appreciate the compliment to our product. And speaking of Cricket, Aubrey, how's your game? Oh, the season looks very promising, C.B. San Francisco is coming down here in July, and Hollywood goes up to British Columbia in August. I didn't know Cricket had come to Hollywood. Isn't that something new? Where does it happen? There's nothing new, but there are two playing fields in Griffiths Park on Riverside Drive. Come around here this Sunday this summer, and you'll see some good game. We'll consider that invitation. Can we see you hit a homerun, Mr. Smith? It's never been done in Cricket, dear. But if you'll come around, I'll hit a homerun. I'll go with you to see that, Gloria. Will Mr. DeMille hit one, too? Right over the fence, Gloria. And I think we've got a hit for next Monday night, too. We're going to present the great Broadway and screen success by Robert E. Sherwood, Abe Lincoln in Illinois. And our star will be the same actor who played Lincoln on both screen and stage, Raymond Massey. It's a thrilling human drama, and above all, a true one that tells the story of those critical years in Lincoln's life before he went to Washington. Critics have called Raymond Massey one of the greatest Lincoln's the stage has ever known. And you'll hear this fine actor in the Lux Radio Theater next Monday night with Faye Bainter and Otto Kruger in Abe Lincoln in Illinois. I know that's a great play, Mr. DeMille, and I look forward to hearing it. I think we'll all be listening. Good night. Good night. Good night. That was an all-star performance from an all-star cast. Our sponsors, the makers of Lux Toilet Soap, joined me in inviting you to be with us again next Monday night when the Lux Radio Theater presents Raymond Massey, Faye Bainter, and Otto Kruger in Abe Lincoln in Illinois. This is Cecil B. DeMille saying good night to you from Hollywood. In tonight's play, Barbara Jean-Moir as Janet Cooper, Shirley Mills as Cecilia, and Gillis as Letty Lou, Wayne Thompson as Mrs. Bins, Edward Marr as Dan, Lou Merrill as Mr. Layton, Emery Parnell as Superintendent, Wally Mayer as Mr. Bins, Sherry Ardell as Edna, and Priscilla Lyon, Anne Howard, Sharon Sedan, and Naomi Stevens. Gloria Jean will soon be seen with Bing Crosby in the Universal Picture if I had my way. Nan Gray's new Universal Picture is the House of the Seven Gables soon to be released. Robert Cummings will appear with Deanna Durbin in the Universal Picture spring parade. Bula Bondi and her new picture is Our Town. Our music was directed by Lois Silvers, and your announcer has been Melville Royke. This is the Columbia Broadcasting System.