 The Lux Radio Theatre brings you Alan Ladd, Dorothy Lamour, and Chester Morris in Coney Island. Ladies and gentlemen, your producer, Mr. Cecil B. DeMille. Greetings from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. And step right this way for an hour of mirth and melody and romance. On the inside of this theater, a stupendous attraction. Straight from the bright lights of Hollywood. Not one, not two, but three glittering stars. Well, I'm afraid as a barker, I can't really do justice to my subject. But the simple facts are enough anyway. Because tonight, we bring you Alan Ladd, Dorothy Lamour, and Chester Morris in the great 20th Century Fox musical hit, Coney Island. For all of you who put in a hard day's work, here's the perfect way to relax. It won't solve a single post-war problem, and it has nothing to do with boundaries or politics. Coney Island is just pure unadulterated entertainment, with Alan Ladd and Chester Morris involved in a furious feud for the affections of Dorothy Lamour. And Dorothy singing such catchy tunes of my boyhood as Put Your Arms Around Me, Honey, and Cuddle Up a Little Closer. I remember Coney Island, and the days when we traveled down New York Bay by boat to get there, or drove down Ocean Parkway in Brooklyn by horse and carriage. Of course, that was some years B.L.F., that's before Lux Flake. I particularly remember how the barkers used to boast at the tremendous bargain they were offering with their few minutes of entertainment for 10 or 15 cents. I'm sure any one of them would have fainted immediately at the idea of presenting stars like Alan Ladd, Dorothy Lamour, and Chester Morris in tonight's play with no admission charge at all. Because your loyalty to Lux makes this modern kind of theater possible. And you ring the bell two ways, with a hit play every Monday night, and a hit product, Lux Flake, at home every day. And now, we ring the bell for tonight's curtain on Coney Island, starring Dorothy Lamour as Katie, Alan Ladd as Eddie, and Chester Morris as Joe. Today in New York, the closest spot to heaven probably is the top of the Empire State Building. But 40 years ago, New Yorkers came closest to paradise at a breeze swept beach on the Atlantic Ocean. Only a short distance from the heart and throbbing city, they found a land whose milk and honey was clam chowder and steaming weenies. A place of perpetual carnival, of singing waiters and persuasive barkers. A little raucous, a little rowdy, but nevertheless beautiful Coney Island. One spring afternoon, a young man named Eddie Johnson makes his first visit to Coney Island. Eddie has plans for a big business deal, involving an old acquaintance, Joe Rocco, owner of the scenic gardens cafe. Well, this is quite a surprise, Eddie. Yeah, nice place you got here, Joe. A little different from those shooting galleries we used to have, aren't they? Once we had a whole carnival, remember? Uh, vaguely. Yeah, then two years ago in St. Louis, we had an argument about how the carnival should be run. We decided to play a hand of poker for the whole works. Yes, and I won it with three of the prettiest aces you ever saw. Yeah, I've been trying to find you ever since, Joe. I wanted to give you these. I found them the next morning under the cushion of your chair, four of the prettiest aces you ever saw. Well, Eddie, I guess this makes up for all those times I went to the cash drawer and found your hand in it. Now, why don't we just forget the whole business, huh? Oh, I've tried to forget it, Joe. I've tried and tried. You're going to sue me? No, but I figured that since you cheated me out of our carnival, we're really still partners, and that means I own half of this joint. Well, there's just one hitch, Eddie. I don't figure the same way. Well, in that case, I'll just have to worm myself in, Joe, one way or another. I'm sorry to hear that. Oh, but I just got to pay you back, Joe. If I didn't, I'd lose all my self-respect. I just wanted to show you my new dress, Joe. How do you... Oh, it's all right, honey. The man's just leaving. This is Eddie Johnson, Kate Farley. She's my singer here. Oh, hello, Miss Farley. How do you do? The dress looks wonderful, Kate. Hey, will you look at the feathers. It'll be a nice dress when it gets through molding. Go on, Eddie. Push off. You won't change your mind, huh? No, sorry. All right, suit yourself, Joe. Oh, Miss Farley. Yes? When you take that dress off, you'd better hang it up in a bird cage. Listen, you smart alec, I've had just a lot... With all those feathers, you know, it's liable to fly away. Goodbye, Miss Farley. The phone emits it. It's only ten cents. Hurry, hurry, hurry. Come in and see her. She's Josephine, the tattooed lady. She's covered with artistic masterpieces. You see Gaines Burris Blue Boy talking things over with Whistler's mother. You'll see the leading Tower of Pisa. Come in and marvel at this. Look, Eddie. Eddie Johnson. Eddie, you won't serve a gun. Frankie and Finnegan. Hey, you're looking great. Why not? He's preserved in alcohol. Not since the Chicago Fair, if I looked upon your head. Say this call for a celebration. Yeah, but tell me, is this your pitch? Yeah, I'm sorry to say it's mine. All mine. What in the world are you doing at Coney Island? From the looks of business, nothing. Eddie, have you seen Joe yet? Joe Rockoff? Yeah, I just came from there. You're coming up with Joe again, are you? No, not just Joe Finnegan. I'm looking for a new partner, Frankie. You interested? Eddie, I ain't got but only nine bucks to my name. Well, listen to me and you'll be rolling in dough. Huh? I've got an idea for a pitch that's worth a fortune. Well, that's great. Go and open it up, but let me alone. Whatever good location it's taken. This would be just a spot for it, Frankie. Hurry, hurry, hurry. The only tattooed woman on Coney Island. Every time she shakes, moving pictures. Now look, will you listen to me? We can have it ready in two days' time and for less than $300. Well, I just told you I got exactly nine. I've got the money. All I want from you is this location and your time. Eddie, you just made yourself a deal. If the six of us with Josephine even suicide would look good to me. Come on, lads. Let's have a beer and talk it over. Dolly, will you look at that? What? That mob over there in front of Frankie's place. Oh, didn't you know? Frankie's got himself a new show and a new partner. That fella doing the Balkans, huh? Oh, so that's Frankie's new partner, is it? Come on, Dolly. We're going over there. Is there a show like that? You bet. Here's my chance to get even. Katie, you just don't make sense. I'll explain later. Come on. And it's only ten cents. Ten cents to see this daring exhibition of genuine Turkish hair and girls. Hurry, hurry, hurry. See the young Turkish maiden soldier to sell him for twenty pieces of silver. An authentic and educational exhibition with genuine oriental music is played by Abu Mandir, a Turkish gentleman seated there before you on the Persian carpet. Listen, friends. Listen to him. Why, that's Frankie, ain't it? Playing just like a snake charmer. Of course it is. He looks as much like a Turk as you do. Would you look at him by those tickets? These guys are making a fortune. Damn that, Dolly. I'm going to go to work. Only eight seats left. Hurry, hurry, hurry. Oh, Frankie. Hello, Frankie. Huh? Oh, hello, honey. Glad to see you. I'm amazed, Jens. Amazed. Abu arrived in this country only two days ago and already he speaks a few words of English. All right, little lady. Kindly move along now. Kindly move along. He used to talk to me plenty. We were working together. Oh, with him. It's me on the acon crane. Yes, Abu. You do, huh? It's me in top lorry pursuit. All right, Abu. I'll ask you. Young lady, Abu here can't figure out why you're wearing that atrocity on your head. He says it can't be a hat or can't. Abu says, did lady lose election bed or did lady fall into fruit salad? Kate, we better get out of here. The nerve. The nerve of that bum. Why do I tell Joe? Just wait. Why, the young lady is going away. Don't rush off, sweetheart. All right, boys. Hurry, hurry, hurry. The show starts in exactly three minutes. It's the last thing we need. He insults me in front of everybody. He insults our customers. Well, that's what I've been trying to find out. There's something funny going on, Kitty. You know, I think I'll just take a look around. You leave me by. Come on in and have a drink. Oh, I don't care. Not here in Rocco's place. Finnegan, you're sick. No, but Steve is Rocco's bartender. The doctor discovered the deer lad had chronic prognosis. And him handled all the glass of the people drinks out of. And he was just going in there. Oh, I've been standing here while an army friends to keep away. Oh, thanks, Finnegan. Now, if he was looking for something intoxicated, there's Eddie Johnson's new short just up the street. Ah, those turkeys, Carly. That's for me, Finnegan. I'll see you later. My, my. So you're the one who's stirring my trade away? I'd like to murder you, Finnegan. Wait a minute, Joe. It's not his fault. You know who put him up to this, don't you? Well, I got a pretty good idea. Go on, Finnegan, beat it. Joe, you've got to show that foreflusher where he gets off. Hey, Louis. Yeah, Joe. Louis, that, uh, that old friend of mine, Eddie Johnson, he, uh, he needs a lesson. I got some friends in Brooklyn, Joe. They're swell teachers. Yeah. Well, I want that coach joint of his to look like an earthquake, hit it. You understand? Relax, boss. It's as good as done. Frankie. Frankie. Oh. Hey, can you move? Oh, I'm fine. Just resting. Oh, what hit me? Well, it seems like Joe wants to play a little rough. Hey, take a look around. Oh, what a wreck. Yeah, it's a nice place while it lasts, Frankie. Well, let's start looking for a carpenter. Maybe we can be back in business in three or four days. Maybe. Uh-uh. Why not? Next time Joe may use dynamite. Oh. Hey, Frankie. Frankie, I got an idea. Let's wreck Joe's joint. Dynamite? No, nice and legal. You see that sign across the street? Well, read it. Welcome to Coney Island, the United Brotherhood of Irish bricklayers local 742. Yeah. They'll be here tomorrow, Frankie. The United Brotherhood. So they'll be here. Oh, don't you see? Rockwell's place will be filled with Irishmen. After they've had a few beers, you and I will go in and we'll start making some nasty remarks. And then pretty soon it'll be the wildest knockdown. Angels sing, angels sing. When Irish eyes are smiling. Get a drink on the house, boys. It's free. Free beer. I'll be up in the office. See that these boys get treated right. Okay, Joe. Say, Louie, come here a minute. Hey, you guys, don't you know when it's time to leave town? I don't try to deny it, Louie. That dirty crack you just made about those bricklayers. Your horse or they're a bunch of lilies, are they? Hey, what are you guys trying to pull? Sure, you better take back what you said about the Irish, too. I ain't said nothing about nobody. And who said what about the Irish lads? This guy here making cracks about us Irish bricklayers. Telling me that one Irishman can lick 10 Irishmen? Oh, he did. He did indeed. Oh, dear, dear. Now, get away from me, you... You're tougher, you laddie. I'll give you three seconds to take his hold back. But I didn't sign that. An honest I did. And a liar he is, too. Go to sleep, laddie. Sleep well. Hey, let's sit down, Frankie. Here in the corner, I want to enjoy this. Oh, look at the way that bricklayer through that chair. Wasn't that beautiful? Yeah, right through Joe's best mirror. Oh, I'm sorry, Joe has to miss this. Where is he? He's upstairs. Hey, wait a minute. He's coming down now. Are you sure making his scenic gardens off? Scenic. Get out of my way for this. Now, Joe, I'd like to let you pass, but I can't. You might try to stop the burden. Burn. They're wrecking your place. Get out of the way. Get. All right, come on, Frankie. Send him down to my bed. Oh, he's cold as a cucumber. Oh, he'll be all right. When Joe pushed him, he hit his head on the bar rail. He'll come around in a minute or two. Close by. I'm sure nobody saw us. Saw us what? Carrying Finnegan out. Well, what if they did? We couldn't leave him on the floor with the riot going on. Oh, but I got an idea, Frank. You had a great idea. Another one? Look, you've done all right for one day. Hey, listen, he's coming around. Wouldn't I wish I was smiling? Get his leg him on. Finnegan. Finnegan, wake up, Finnegan. Keep quiet. I'll do the talking. Oh, oh. Hello, boys. Hello, Finnegan. Eh, where am I? In my bed, Finnegan. You've been here for hours and hours. What's that? What happened? Oh, it's terrible, Finnegan. The doctor's just left. Doctor? Is there somebody sick? Yeah. You are poor fella. Caranium contusions. Yeah, Finnegan. All over your body. Oh, dear, dear, dear. Me poor head hurts, too. The doctors say you have a chance, Finnegan, if you get out of town. Ah, but I feel better already. Otherwise, I'll have to take you to the city hospital. I took a drink of water yesterday. I've been poisoned. Oh. Now, don't worry about money. A few weeks and say Atlantic City and you'll be a new man. Frankie and I will take you to the train. Get a carriage, Frankie. OK. Oh, thank you, lads. Thank you. Atlantic City. Oh, to me a world of good boys. A change of saloons is just what I need. Yes. Boss. Boss. Look. Eddie Johnson and Frankie, huh? How long have they been here? Nearly an hour, boss. First I've seen of them since they started that fight here two days ago. Hey. Hey, they got black ties on. Yeah. I guess they must have been at Finnegan's funeral this morning. Finnegan's funeral? Sure, Joe. He died the day of the fight. What? Oh, a big funeral this morning. Then they sent the remains to Atlantic City. Oh. Oh, I think I'd better talk to Mr. Johnson. Well, here he comes, Eddie. Ah, poor Finnegan. The best friend a man ever had. Sure, and a fine Irishman never lived. Oh, hello, Joe. What was it? His, uh, his heart? His head, Joe. His head. Yeah. Somebody hit a manorful wallop at the bricklayers' party. Well, I see you're getting the place all fixed up, Joe. Yeah. Yeah. Now, about Finnegan, Eddie. I know you saw me push him. You guys wouldn't be trying a little blackmail, would you? Oh, now, Joe, how can you say a thing like that? I told the coronary he hit his head on a curb. Yeah, but if it ever came out that it happened in here, we'd have to tell the truth, Eddie. Well, it wasn't Joe's fault. All it can do is close this place down as a public nuisance. And that's a lot easier than manslaughter. OK, Eddie. How much do you want? Oh, Joe, you always think the worst of me. All I want is a chance to make some more money for you. Go on. Talk. All right, let me run this place. Let me put on the shows, give it some real class, and all I want is 50% of any new business I bring in. Well, it would cost me less to bribe my way out. Oh, well, the coroner asked me to stop in his office later on. Start work tomorrow, Eddie. Yeah, and have Miss Farley here at 9 o'clock in the morning. Who, Katie? Yeah, I'll be changing the whole joint, Joe. And I'm starting on Katie Farley. In just a moment, Mr. DeMille presents Act Two of Coney Island, starring Dorothy Lamour, Alan Ladd, and Chester Morris. Now, what's that you're trying to say, Sally? Starlight, star bright, first star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might, have the wish I wish tonight. You girls are always wishing for something. What is it this time? I'm wishing that everything nice would last twice as long as it does. I wish my marines furloughed, I wish my marines rose, twice as long as it does. I wish my marines furlough was twice as long. I wish my vacation would last twice as long. I wish four points worth of butter would last twice as long. Wouldn't it be wonderful? I can't tell you what to do about those things, but there are some nice things you can make last twice as long. Stockings, for instance. Twice the wear for stockings is probably right at the top of every girl's wishing list. It's a wish nightly luxing can help come true. The pain tests proved that stockings washed in lux flakes lasted twice as long without going into runs as those rubbed with cake soap or washed with a strong soap. Rayon, nylon, silk, cotton, all showed similar results. Extra wear from every pair. With lux care. And while you're making your stockings last longer, make your lux flakes last longer too. Just use as much as you need to get rich suds, but no more than you need. That helps fight waste. Now, our producer, Mr. DeMille. Act two of Corny Island starring Alan Ladd as Eddie, Dorothy Lamour as Katie, and Chester Morris as Joe. Believing that Finnegan is dead, Joe Rocco has made Eddie manager of his scenic gardens café. The new impresario spends his first day in hiring an orchestra and revamping the entertainment program. But Eddie is having his trouble. The program consists almost entirely of Miss Katie Farley. And Katie Farley refuses to be revamped. It's eight o'clock. You let everybody else go to dinner. Why can't I? Because I do what I say and you don't. Now, cool off and try the number again. Here, I'll play the piano. What do you want this time? Well, you sing too fast. You sing too loud. You move around too much. Outside of that, you're great. Everybody sings fast. It's a style. All right, then we'll change the style. All right, I'll do it again. Go ahead, play. Come on, stop shouting. If you want your family in a whole book and they hear you, use the telephone. You forthright flasco. I gotta sing loud. There'll be a crowd out there tonight. They make a lot of noise. Well, if you're good, they'll stop talking and listen. I've been doing great for a whole year. They like me here. And nobody's going to change my style of singing. Nobody. I'm leaving now, Mr. Eddie Johnson. I'll be back in time to do my number my way. Goodbye. You're ready, Katie. The show starts in a couple of minutes. I am ready. Hey, wait a minute. In that dress with the feathers, I thought I told you that. I'm doing what I like, Mr. Johnson. And I just told the orchestra leader to play my number my way. Fast. Good and fast. Well, I hope you don't move around, Katie, with our new scenery. You should stand nice and quiet. In front of a fake tree with a fake moon shining, I'll have to move tonight to dodge the vegetables. Okay. You're the star you should know. Oh. Well, that's better. Tell them to start playing and ring up the curtain. Oh, uh, Mr. Menek, Katie. Hey, what do you think you're doing? Oh, I'm just fixing the bottom of your dress. Come along with it. Hey, what's that you got? Handcuffs? Get away. Stop it. Stop it. The handcuffs are for your pretty little ankles. I've barred them from the cop outside. I'm afraid you'll have to stand still now, Katie, or you'll fall flat on your face. Take, take those offers. They'll help me. I'll, I'll... At least, at least go around your wrist, sweetheart. See, like this. There. That's better. And how do I walk out on the stage, smart guy? Oh, I, uh, I carry you. See? It's very simple. I'll show you. I'll just stand there and I won't sing a note. Hey, the handcuffs on your wrist, they show. I gotta cover them up. Oh, here's just a thing. My feathers. You're pulling off my feathers. Well, hold them in your hand. I think it's an ostrich fan. I paid a lot of money for this dress. Here's another one. You know, I guess I should have dipped you first in boiling water. Mmm, you big baboon. You, oh, you just wait. You'll be sorry. Frankie. Yeah. Tell the leader out there if he wants to keep his job to play slow, nice and slow. Okay. All set, Miss Farley? Chin up now. Sing nice and pretty. Get out of here. Get out! Curtain! Love me more. Now put me down. Oh, you can't walk with handcuffs on your feet. Taking you to the dressing room. Well, what do you think of my way of singing now? That applause wasn't so much. Say, you couldn't have gotten more if you were a parade. Hey, my dressing room. Now get these things off. In a minute. Katie, they like you tonight. There wasn't a sound while you're singing. But once you had real class. Where do you get off talking to me like that? There are a lot of people around here who like me just the way I am, see? Sure, but more people will like you. Just listen to me. You've got warmth, peel, you're attractive. You know, in fact, you're so attractive, I think I got to kiss you. Wait for me. There. And you'll be still more attractive. Still more attractive than you just dress instead of over-gressing. I'm no dummy. I went to school. I finished the tenth grade. I even... Uh-oh. Here's that feeling again. I need another kiss. Is that what you learned in the tenth grade? No. That's why I was kicked out of the eleven. Just wait till I get out of these chains. I'll slap your face so hard it'll... No, you won't. Because you know that everything I've told you is right. Okay, I'll take the handcuffs off now. They're off, Katie. Here's my face. Go ahead and slap. Oh. Oh, get out of here. Please get out. Good night, Katie. Good night. Thanks. Come in, Eddie. I thought it was about time we did a little bookkeeping. Oh, any complaints? Complaints? No. In three weeks, you've turned this place into a gold mine. We've taken in nearly $20,000 with a net of 5,000 bucks over average business. You get 50% Eddie, and here it is. You know, Joe, for $30,000, we could buy us a new place. I'm making all I want right here. And why kid ourselves? We're doing great because of Katie. But she's been sensational. That's right. Yeah, but how long could she stay on top? She's not on top. She's just starting. Give her time. She'll be the biggest star in years. She's slouching. Yeah. Oh, uh, incidentally, I'd just as soon as you and Katie keep it on a strictly business basis, Eddie. Oh? Yeah. Yeah, I always had the silly idea that, uh, well, that Katie was my girl. You know what I mean? Oh, sure, Joe. I... I'll see, won't we? Well, that's right. We'll see. Eddie! Eddie, my boy! Are you there? Eddie! Who is it? Finnegan, speaking from his Latin city. Finnegan. There's something, boys. Are you not glad to see your dear old friend? Uh, hello, Finnegan. What? Hello. Joe, you look like you're seeing a ghost. That's just what I am seeing. Or, uh, am I, Eddie? What is this? Everybody stares at me so queerly. Why, two of the boys downstairs signed the pledge as soon as they walked in the door. Uh, Finnegan. I'll see you later, huh? Later. Oh, oh, you're busy. Sure, Eddie. Oh, it was a lovely time. I had a lovely, lovely time. Well... Joe, I told you I'd worm in here. One way or another. Well, you slipped over a fast one and tripled my business. You know I like being taken that way. Joe, what about a new place? Oh, I can wait. You better come in on it with me, Joe. If you don't, I'll buy it myself. Katie and me. And we'll take all your business away. Well, I wouldn't like that, Eddie. I wouldn't like that at all. Can I help you? Yes, I'm Joe Rocco. I have an appointment with Mr. Hammerstein. Oh, yes, sir. Go right in. Oh, thanks. I'm Rocco, Mr. Hammerstein. Well, sit down, young man. Thanks. I've just been reading the press notices about Miss Farley. I have to admit these hard-boiled critics seem to back up everything you say. Oh, she's really wonderful, Mr. Hammerstein. Well, society doesn't flock to Coney Island for nothing. How long has this been going on? Well, she started to click about three months ago. I can't understand why you come to me, Rocco. If I thought she'd be good for my new show, I'd try to steal her from you. Well, Katie belongs here, here on Broadway. She's still good for Coney Island. Well, I'll certainly drop out to hear her sing. Oh, fine. And when can you make it? Well, I can't say exactly. Next week, probably. Well, thanks a lot, Mr. Hammerstein. Oh, not at all. I'll telephone you before I come. Goodbye, Rocco. Miss Kate Farley's singing, Put Your Arms Around Me, Honey. You've got it at last, that trick of making every guy feel your singing just for him. It's easy when it's not a trick, Eddie. Huh? Oh, Katie, you mean that? You mean all those pear-shaped tones were just for me, huh? Couldn't you tell? Oh, honey. Come on now. Hurry up and change. I got things to talk about. I won't be long. Wait for me. Hey, Eddie. Oh, Joe. Say she did great, didn't she? Now, look, Eddie, turn me out of my dough if you want to. And if you can, I can laugh about that. But when it comes to Katie, I lose my sense of humor. I wouldn't do that, Joe. You may need it. Well, I just want you to know I'm going to do everything I can to break it up between you two. Now I'll tell you something. I'm going to be leaving here in a few weeks. I'm getting that new place. You can still have half if you want. Oh, I'm doing fine right here. I won't ask you again, Joe. Oh, come on. Get smart. You haven't got that kind of dough. That's why I went to the Brooklyn Savings Bank. They said if I have Kate Farley, they'll owe me $20,000. Oh. Well, what makes you think Katie will go with you? Love is a wonderful thing, Joe. A wonderful thing is love. Eddie, where's Joe? I don't know. He said something about a poker game at the continental. What are you all excited about? Downstairs, Hammerstein. William Hammerstein's downstairs. What about... Who? Hammerstein. He's the producer. He says Joe asked him to come and hear Katie. Funny Joe didn't say so. Well, yeah. Hammerstein told Joe he'd be down next week, and he's going to be a bright tonight, so he came on over. Hey, I'll go and tell Katie. You stay put. Huh? Look, you see what Joe's trying to do? I want to open up that new cafe. If Katie comes with me, I get a big loan from the bank. But if Katie goes to Hammerstein, I'm licked. Yeah, but what do we do now? Well, I'll have Joe can play poker. I guess it's okay if Katie and I take the evening off. What? She's got a number coming up. Dolly knows all her songs. Dolly will sing. I thought understudies are four. Besides, I wouldn't want a disappointment to Hammerstein. Oh, Dolly is a comic. She'll sound awful. I hope so. Hammerstein will think she's Katie. Oh. You know that sign with Katie's name on it? Yeah, you mean the great big one on the side of the stage? Yeah. See that it stays there when Dolly sings. I'll talk to Hammerstein now. Go get Katie and tell her to meet with the siren. Okay, Eddie. I hope you know what you're doing. You look wonderful here, Eddie. Yeah. Beach fires in the sand, stars in the snow, moon on the water. I could give you all night. I feel awful guilty running out like this. Oh, forget it. You'll only miss one number. Besides, it's a small break for Dolly. Listen. A moonlight picnic on the beach. Lucky people. We'll do that, too. Someday after I get my own place. You sure have big plans, Eddie. Why not? And you know who's going to sing for me? Who? Katie Fire. Really? Oh, I've got to head it, Katie. I want everything to be the best. That's the nicest compliment you ever paid me. You know, if you're not careful, you're going to wind up owning Coney Island. I intend to. What a guy. And what a sap. Sap? Me? No, me. I've fallen for you, Eddie. I've fallen awful hard. Katie. You'll never be sorry. Never. The song's late around, Mr. Hammerstein. That's fine, but I think I've heard enough. Tell Mr. Rocco I was greatly impressed. Well, thanks, Mr. Hammerstein. Goodbye. Mr. Hammerstein. Hello, Rocco. I understood you were out. I was, but one of my boys telephoned me you were here. I came right back. Mr. Johnson took very good care of me. Fine. Well, what did you think of Miss Fawley? Well, as you told me, she's very unusual. I'll think it over and let you know. Good night. Well, good night, Mr. Hammerstein. Frankie, tell Katie to come here. Well, I'll go look for it, Joe. What do you mean you'll go look for it? Where is she? Well, you see, Joe, it's like this. Just before... Say, Joe, I heard a wonderful story tonight. It seems to have too far... All goes on around here. There's Katie now, coming in the front-enders with Eddie. Where have they been? Well, just as I was saying, Joe, it seems to have been... Get out of here. Eddie. Hello, Joe. Can I talk to you a minute, Katie? Sure. You're not sore, are you, Joe? No. Well, what about... Well, what about? Well, Eddie and I went for a little walk. I skipped my last number. Dolly did it for me. Oh. Oh, well, no wonder I couldn't figure it out. Figure what out, Joe? Well, I think you can guess. But I'd better tell Katie. What are you talking about? Katie. William Hammerstein was here a little while ago. He came just to hear you sing. Oh, no. Yes, I invited him. He's looking for a singer. But why didn't you tell me? Well, I expected him next week. But Eddie knew he was here. Oh, but how did I know it was Hammerstein? I never saw the guy before in my life. You know, that's very funny. He told me Mr. Johnson had taken very good care of him. And you know, Katie, when he heard Dolly sing, he thought it was you. Well, how could he get that idea? Look up on the stage. Somebody didn't bother to change the sign. I see. Looks like Mr. Johnson took care of a lot of things. Oh, now, wait a minute. Katie, I... Why didn't you tell me? Shall I tell her, Eddie, or will you? I'll go ahead and tell her. Well, it's so simple, Katie. You see, if Hammerstein heard you and signed you for his show, then Eddie wouldn't have you for his new cafe. And without Eddie, without you, there isn't going to be any new cafe. Oh, wait a minute. That's not true. Now, look, Katie, it's Eddie before you quit. I just want you to know you're fired. And thanks, Eddie. Thanks a lot for taking me out tonight. I'll... I'll never forget it. We pause now for station identification. This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System. Mr. DeMille returns with Dorothy Lamour, Alan Ladd, and Chester Morris for the third act of Coney Island after a brief intermission. Now, here's our friend Libby Collins with some inside information. You might call it undercover news, Mr. Kennedy, because it's about undies. Did you know they're using balloon cloth for lingerie now? Balloon cloth? You mean like those big barrage balloons you see in the picture? Exactly. The government has released a limited quantity of it for civilian needs. And it's cropping up in dresses and glasses, but mostly in underpants. I've seen some simply darling long-sleeved grammar the night he's made of it. It's surprisingly fine, like lawn or batis. Nice enough even for a bride's true soul. Today's cottons are so attractive, they deserve a place right alongside your pretty rayon undies. And the same safe care. Gentle lux flakes. Yes, gentle lux care for all your undies will keep them new-looking longer. Actual washing tests on rayon slips in 90s prove that lux care keeps colors lovely three times longer. Strong soaps, hot water and rough handling faded colors over 50% in only 30 washings. Pulled out seams and frayed shoulder straps, too. But lux undies stayed lovely. No matter whether your undies are cotton, rayon, or precious silk, they'll stay lovely longer with gentle lux flakes. To say it with music, undies lead a long life when they lead a lux flight. Now, Mr. DeMille returns to the microphone. We'll have some news on the private lives of our stars after the play. And now the curtain rises on the third act of Coney Island. Darring Dorothy Lamour, Alan Ladd and Chester Morris. Katie missed one opportunity to sing for William Hammerstein, but Joe Rocco quickly arranged another audition. He's taken Katie to New York and fits with the producer in Hammerstein's theater. On the empty stage, Katie is finishing her number. Well, Mr. Hammerstein? Oh, she's all right. It's no use. Your smile gave you away. I thought if I acted hard-boiled, I might get her for less money. Katie, you were great. Wonderful. Mr. Rocco and I are just going into my office to talk about it to you. Wait there, Katie. I'll be back in just a few minutes. I'll wait. Oh, I want to thank you. You played the song exactly as... Eddie. Hello, Katie. What are you doing down there in the orchestra pit? Playing for you. I told Hammerstein's pianist you were expecting me. That and five bucks seem to convince him. Katie, give me just one more minute. There are a lot of things I want to explain. I listened to you once before. Of all the selfish, conniving... Oh, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Remember me? I'm the guy who just played the piano for you. If I'd wanted to, I could have grabbed your act off of Lisa. I didn't, though, because... well, I want you to get that job. I'm sorry about the other time, Katie. And that makes everything all right, I suppose. No, but it should make you take that cotton out of your ear long enough for me to tell you why I did. I know why. You want that new place. I'm sure I do, but that wasn't the real reason. I didn't want you to work for Hammerstein because... well, because it would put too much distance between us. Eddie, it's exactly 11 miles from here to Coney Island. I'm not talking about that kind of distance. Once you hit Broadway, you'd be a million miles from me. It's happened so many times before Katie and I... well, I just didn't want to lose you. You see, I... I happened to love you. That's why I did it. Well, I guess that's all I have to say. Eddie. Oh, Eddie, get me out of here quickly. Yeah, but what about Hammerstein, Broadway? I'm from Coney Island, Eddie, and right now I feel an awful long way from home. Well, where have you been, Katie? What happened to you? Six hours ago, I left you on a stage in New York. I'm sorry, Joe, but Eddie came along and I... And I figured it would be better if Katie wasn't around while you and Hammerstein were talking business. Hammerstein wanted you to sign a contract. So did Eddie. Look, Joe. Oh. Oh, a marriage license. Yeah, that's right. It looks just like a liquor license. Except it's got little cupids running all over it. Well, congratulations. Um, when's the wedding? Tomorrow afternoon, Joe, and I... I'd like you to be the best man. Well, thanks. That's... that's swell. Um, what'll I tell Hammerstein? Oh, we just spoke to him on the telephone. He's not starting a rehearsal till August. He said we'll have plenty of time for honeymoon. Oh, you mean you still want to sign with Hammerstein? You bet. Surprise, Joe. Well, frankly, yes. I thought you wanted Katie for your new cafe. I did. But I want her more with my wife. Well, Joe, we'll see you at the church. Yeah, the little one right across from Brighton Park. Tomorrow afternoon, 4.30, huh? I'll be there. You see, Joe, it all worked out just beautifully. Yeah. Beautifully. Hey, Louis. Yeah? You, uh, you remember Sylvester Keene? That broken down actor? Sure. He blew in last week. He was looking for a job. Well, get hold of him. Tell him he's got a job. Dolly, it's 4.30. Where can he be? You said Louis's bringing Eddie in an automobile. He probably got a flat tire. I'm going out and look for him. You stay right here in this room. It's bad luck to go inside before the wedding march. I ought to know, been married four times. Then you find it. Okay, I'll find it. Oh, excuse me. I was about to knock. Miss Farley? No, that's Miss Farley. Who is it? I'm Sylvester Keene from the Brooklyn Savings Bank. Don't tell me I've overdrawn my account. Oh, no, no. I wanted to speak to Mr. Johnson. But I understand he isn't here yet. I thought perhaps you could give him a message. Why, certainly. Just tell Mr. Johnson we've decided to loan him $20,000 for his new cafe. Why, that's wonderful. But if anyone can make a success out of a cafe, it's Mr. Johnson. Well, frankly, Miss Farley, we consider your reputation a little better security than his. An attraction like you would make any cafe a success. Oh, thanks. But I won't be singing in his cafe. I'm going to work for William Hammerstein. You are? Right. Oh, yes. Why, that's strange. Mr. Johnson called us just a little while ago and said that now that you and he are going to be married, you have changed your mind. You are staying in Coney Island. He told you that? Dear, dear, that changes everything. Well, I'm certainly glad we had this little talk, Miss Farley. Yes. Oh, my. I'm sorry if I said anything that... He's here, he's here. They got stuck in traffic. Well, goodbye, Miss Farley. Goodbye. Katie, here are your railroad tickets. Two days in Niagara Falls and they're down through Canada and Detroit. Excuse me a minute. Eddie, I'll get them for you, honey. Please. And, uh, Jody Murray. No, you want to be alone with them, huh? Well, I'll just tell the preacher he's here. All right, Mrs. Johnson. Here, close these for the train. Close the door, Eddie. Huh? Oh, sure. Eddie, a man was here just now from the bank. He was? Well, what do you want? Did you tell them that I was going to be seeing you? Well, last week I said I might be able to get you, but that was before Hammerstein said that... You spoke to them again today? Today. You told them you had me all sewed up? Oh, now, wait a minute. I don't know who was here, what he said, but... Don't lie, Eddie. You know you couldn't get the money without me. What was your plan this time to convince me on our honeymoon? Oh, Katie. Katie, you don't honestly think that. What do you want me to think? That I'm marrying you because I love you for no other reason. Isn't there anything you'd like to explain? No, I'm not even going to try. Katie, you've got to believe me because down deep you just know I'm on the little. Unless you do, our marriage wouldn't be worth a hoot. Is that all, Eddie? Yeah. Yeah, that's all. Someday you'll find out I'm telling the truth, except then it may be too late. If you leave me now, well, I guess it's all over. You know that, don't you? Yes, I know that. What are you going to do? What I have to do? I'm leaving now. In a mission, ten minutes. Ten minutes in a mission. Smoking in the outer lobby, please. Smoking in the outer lobby. Somewhere in Coney Island, I think. Oh, there you have a sign telling himself another star. Finally, girls, the whole show I could see her every night. Well, Eddie, looks like she's in. Yeah, she's got them standing on their ears, Frankie. Well, I saw I wouldn't do this, but I got her. To what? Going backstage, Frankie. I'll see you later. It's about time. Good luck, Eddie. The same, Katie. Oh, it's sensational. Oh, and wait till I hear the third act. Thanks, Joe. But I'll believe it when I read it in the morning paper. Oh, by the way, I saw Eddie in the lobby, Katie. If you want, I'll ask him to drop in later. In case he has the same idea. Tell him to save himself the trouble. Do you really mean that? What do you think? Well, I think it's about time I gave you this. Joe, it's beautiful. And I didn't win it in a card game either. It's one ring I bought in a jewelry store. Hey, that's the wrong hand. It's a left-handed ring. Oh. Oh, no go, huh? Joe, I... Oh, forget it, Katie, but keep the ring. You know, just because a hay burner runs second, he doesn't ask for his entry fee back. I'm so sorry, Joe. Oh, Katie, listen. Since I did run out of the money, there's something you ought to know. That day in the church, when you were going to be married, I... Come in. Hello, Katie. Joe. Hello, Eddie. I just wanted to tell you how swell it's going. You're even better than I thought you'd be. Well, thanks, Eddie. How have you been? Oh, fine, fine. I'll open the cafe next month. Will you drop out? Sure. Where's it going to be? Well, I'm the same building I always had in mind. I thought you took an option on that building, Joe. I did. You know, Eddie, I hate to tell you this, but the reason I let the option expire was because the fire commissioner tipped me off. They're going to condemn the building. Well, I hate to tell you this, Joe. But that guy wasn't the fire commissioner. I see. Just a friend of yours, huh? Uh-huh. The way you two double-cross each other and smile about it beats me. Yeah, we've sure pulled some beauties. Yeah. Remember the time you got me that date with a blonde and she turned out to be the sheriff's wife? Well, that was nothing. What about the time I was running that free show in Toledo? You painted the male space and the sword swallow was back, and I got 30 days for it. And in Memphis, Joe pays me off in counterfeit bills. I get tight and try to cash one of them at the police station. What about that day at the church when you sent that guy over who was supposed to be from the bank, Sylvester Keene? You know, that one really hit the jackpot. Joe, never forget it. Eddie, you should have seen his makeup. It was perfect. I'll bet it was, Joe. And when Louie told me how he stalled you off by getting caught in the traffic, I thought I... Well, Miss Farley, now you know. Joe, was that the something you wanted to tell me? Yeah. Yeah, he still loves your kitty. Don't let him get away from you again. That's so easy to say. Is that you going up, Miss Farley? Things will work out. You'll see. Oh, here they are in your wine-conny island hot dogs. Eddie, what in the world are you doing out here? Hello, kitty. Well, I could ask the same question. At nine o'clock at night, you should be tending to business. Eddie, how is the new place? Oh, fine. I'd like you to see it. Maybe later, Eddie. You see, I got a telegram from Joe. He said to meet him on the conny island pier at nine o'clock Sunday night. Well, here I am. That's funny. I got a telegram, too. Joe? No, from the city hall. Something about my license not being legal after tomorrow. Said a man would be here to see me about it at nine o'clock. It sounds awful phony to me. Some amateur is trying to pull a fast one. I just opened it up. The license is good for a whole year. Listen. Somebody's having a good time. Yeah. Moonlight picnic on the beach, remember? We were going to do that one day. Kitty, do you think that... Hot dogs, conny island caviar. Oh, hello, Eddie, hot dog. Sure, why not? Eddie? I'll take a bite of yours. With mustard, Mac. That's it. Thanks. Eddie, hot dog, get your son. Open your mouth. Mmm, delicious. You got mustard all over? I'll lick it off. Mmm, good. I, uh... I know a better way to take mustard off. You do? Uh-huh. This way. Oh, my, that's a wonderful way. Look, uh, how long do I have to stand here watching this? So... Oh, uh, hello, Joe. Hello, Eddie. Now, uh, about that license. Uh, so you sent the telegram. I might have known. Sure, it expires tomorrow. Your, uh, your marriage license. Oh, well, thanks for reminding me. No, that license cost Eddie a dollar, Katie. It'd be a shame to see that buck wasted. And now in case you two are interested, there's a preacher waiting in my office. The service always was pretty good at your cafe, Joe. Well, Miss Farley, uh, can you spare the time to get married? Well, how long does the marriage take? This one? Uh, about 50 years, I hope. I think I can just about make it. Well, what are you waiting for? Oh, Eddie, just a minute. Oh, now what? Mustard all over your face. And our stars will return for a curtain fall. Did you ever try to describe something in music? Let's take these panhands. A really bad case. They're red and rough and scratchy. Every time you finish with that strong soap, they sting and get angry red and protest. You're self-conscious as if you had lead weights at the end of your arms. Maybe this music describes them. Now, there's another kind of hand. Lust hands. You don't know they do dishes, because they're soft and smooth and lovely. The kind of hands you're proud of. The kind of hands other women envy. The kind that makes you seem feminine and helpless. Here's the kind of music they suggest. Yes, that means luxe hands, soft and white. Of course, they wash dishes, but they don't show it. So if you would like softer, smoother hands, simply change from strong soap to luxe flakes for dishes. No creams, no lotions, no special babying. Simply change from strong soap to luxe. Then you change dishpanhands to luxe hands. And listen, it costs less than a penny a day. That's because luxe goes further. These gentle rich flakes wash up to twice as many dishes, ounce per ounce, as any of ten other leading soaps tested. So if your dealer is out of luxe, try again soon. More is on the way. Luxe is so thrifty, it's worth waiting for. Now, here's Mr. DeMille with our star. The spirit of Corny Island has always been entertainment. And tonight's play was in that pleasant tradition. Thanks to Alan Ladd, Dorothy Lamore, and Chester Morris. Thanks, CB. Pleasure to be back. Are you getting on along with your painting, Alan? Oh, fine. Just a few finishing touches now. I didn't know you were an artist. Alan, Alan, what are your painting? Landscapes, portraits, or still life? I paint my house. You're almost as domestic as I am. I've been keeping house for the last few weeks, cleaning, washing dishes. In a sarong? No, this was vacation. I did the cooking, too. In a sarong? No, this was a vacation. But, Dorothy, how'd you get that tan, then? Oh, I'm a little swimming, too. In a sarong? No, this was a vacation. Shall we go round again? You know, I just celebrated my first wedding anniversary. Well, my daughter is celebrating her first anniversary next Friday. Right on. It's fine. I didn't know she was there. Yes, sir. She'll be a year old Friday. Well, that's a wonderful age. I remember when Chester Morris was a year old. We all thought he was a very pretty baby. Yes, well, CB, what's the play next week? Well, Chester, it's the RKO screen drama, This Land is Mine. And our stars will be Charles Lawton and Moreno Sullivan. This Land is Mine is a story of heroism among the ordinary people of Europe, of the young and old who cling to the banner of freedom with their lives at stake and wait in the darkness for that one great day to come, the day of liberation. It was a fine picture, CB. I'll be listening. Good night. Good night. Good night. Good night. Good night. See you all coming out in some time. Our sponsors, the makers of Lux Flakes, join me in inviting you to be with us again next Monday night. When the Lux Radio Theater presents Charles Lawton and Moreno Sullivan in This Land is Mine. This is CB DeMille saying good night to you from Hollywood. Ladies and gentlemen, the surest and safest way to write the men and women in the armed service overseas is by v-mail. And beside these advantages to you, it saves precious cargo space for fighting equipment. When v-mail is used, one transport plane will do the work of 50 similar planes carrying regular air mail letters. Remember that the war and Navy departments give priority to v-mail over all other types of personal mail. So if you haven't been using it, start now. Get the v-mail forms at any stationery counter. Alan Ladd appeared through the courtesy of Paramount Pictures, producers of The Uninvited. Dorothy Lamour will soon be seen in the Paramount Picture and the angels sing. Chester Morris will soon be seen in the Columbia Picture by Secret Command. This program was broadcast to our fighting forces overseas through cooperation with the armed forces radio service. Our music was directed by Louis Silvers. Tonight when you tuned in to the Lux Radio Theater, you knew you would get good entertainment. Try tuning in to the same station tomorrow night and Wednesday at the same time. Tomorrow night you will hear George Burns and Gracie Allen with their guest star Barbara Stanwick. Wednesday night Frank Sinatra sings A Lovely Way to Spend an Evening. Major Beaux will be Frank's guest. Make this station at Lux Time a habit, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday for the best in drama, comedy, and music. This is your announcer, John M. Kennedy, reminding you to tune in again next Monday night to hear Charles Lawton and Moreno Sullivan in This Land is Mine. Hidey hide, no points for spry. It's true ladies, now you don't have to spend even one red ration point for spry. The new easy-mix shortening that gives lighter, better-tasting cakes that stay fresh longer. Get point-free spry tomorrow. Use it for all your baking and prying. Remember, no points for spry shortening. This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting...