 Some of the most difficult people to stand up to are manipulative people. The reason is simple. They admire themselves. Too often, manipulative people do not even know they are manipulative. They love to put themselves at the center and they create a life of deception. They want to be heard. They want what they want and will do anything, including manipulating others to get what they want. They tend to treat others like they don't matter. You can find this type of people everywhere. Perhaps you have a friend, a family member, a colleague at work, or a manipulative spouse. Manipulative people can find your weakness and use them against you. They can use your strengths to serve their own interest. They can do it by offering insincere flattery and moving so close to you for their own benefit. They can also do it negatively through silent treatment, criticism, deception, and emotional abuse. It can be tough being the one manipulated, especially when the manipulator relates with you daily. So how can you deal with a manipulative person? In this video, I will show you some ways you can put a stop to the activities of a manipulative person and so keep yourself safe mentally from their actions. 1. Have clear boundaries. Manipulative people naturally look for people who are always out to please others and then take advantage of them. For the people-pleasers, they find it difficult to set boundaries for themselves. This makes them weak and vulnerable to the attacks of manipulative people. If you know your boundaries or you are a soft individual, note down the things you will accept and disapprove of in your life. If a manipulative person does not honor that boundary you have set for yourself, you can keep away from them or tell them to stare clear. Let them know ahead of time what will happen if they do not honor the boundary you have set. 2. Don't be quick to apologize. Manipulative people know how to make you feel like you're responsible for what went wrong. They like to turn things around to make it look like it is your fault. They would act like the victim so they can feel victimized. As soon as you're trying to talk about what they did wrong, they turn the tables to let you know where you are wrong. Before you know it, you are already apologizing for something they did wrong. You might even want to apologize because you want peace to reign in their relationship. By doing that, you are giving the manipulative person the chance to continue to control you. Since manipulative people never take responsibility for what they did wrong, you must learn to stand your ground and never assume responsibility for something you didn't do. You don't have to feel sorry when you're not wrong. 3. They clear about your perspective. A manipulative person can make you question yourself and your perspective about what happened if you don't maintain your stand. If you are sure about your perception of a particular event, stand your ground through because a manipulative person will see to it that they impress a different selfish perspective upon you. When you allow them to tread on your perspective, you will soon find out that you'll start apologizing and you can no longer believe in yourself. You have allowed the manipulative person to win, because this way, they can continue to have control over you. Find out what the right perspective is and maintain your stand against all odds. This way, you will never back down before the manipulative person to allow them to gain control over you. 4. Try not to react. Nothing angers a manipulative person more than an unresponsive partner. When you refuse to defend yourself or explain your view, you can successfully navigate your way out of the trap of a manipulative person. This gets them pissed off. Manipulative people want you to be emotional, so they can be able to control you. If you give in to emotions, they'll know what makes you think and will be able to use that against you. They don't care what you think or whatever you want to say. They just care about their own view and what they want. They can create a lot of drama around you so that when you react emotionally, you will look crazy. They would look like the good guy while you would look like the bad guy. If they continue to accuse, don't give in to emotions, just nod an apology and walk away. 5. Don't bother trying to correct them. The more you try to correct a manipulative person, the more they'll show you that you're wrong and that they are right. Even if they are wrong and you confront them, it is only normal that they would defend themselves with everything they've got. A manipulative person never feels they are wrong. They don't readily admit to being manipulative. When you attempt to correct them, you're only making things worse because they would create more issues out of what is already on ground. You won't win such a battle with a manipulative person. 6. No means no. In dealing with manipulative people, master the art of saying no and meaning it. You don't have to be disrespectful about it, just be calm and diplomatic about it. Don't even bother to offer a reason for saying no. Doing so means they can leverage the information you have offered them to convince you to say yes. Initially, the manipulative person could become angry and would want to continue to convince you, regardless of the amount of time they push you, maintain your stand as no. When you do not budge, they would find a way around what they need to do and will leave you alone. 7. Take time out to make decisions. Manipulative people can even demand that you give them an answer immediately. Don't succumb to their pressure. Refuse it. If you need time to think things through before you make a decision, then do it. Ask for time to think about it. This way, you will have time to think about your decision without having to rush into making one for the benefit of a manipulative person. 8. Keep your distance. If a person is manipulative around you, you can keep your distance or simply cut them away from your life if you can. Ignore them. Delete their contacts. Move away from them. This may be difficult to do when you or a colleague at work. If it is your spouse, talk to him or her about it, or employ the help of a professional counselor. If it is a colleague, then reduce how much you relate or contact such a person. 9. Be aware and open-minded. There is a difference between someone trying to manipulate you and someone trying to encourage you. You must ask yourself if this person talking to you is trying to encourage you for your good or they are trying to manipulate you for their own interest. An encouragement, the person speaks the truth to you with intent to benefit you by it and then leave you to decide for yourself. They accept and respect your final decision even if they disagree. On the other hand, a manipulative person tells you something that may be truthful but it's ultimately for their benefit. The key here is that they won't let you make your own decision and won't accept or respect your final decision. They'll keep pressing until you make the decision they want you to make. 10. Get help from a professional counselor. You should seek professional help especially if the manipulator is your spouse. It can be difficult to bridge this gap because you guys are so close to each other. Like of your mental health, you should talk to a professional counselor who will guide you through how to deal with such a spouse. If possible, you both should even see the counselor together. This can heal your marriage in a great way. An external perspective can help you see things more clearly. If it's difficult to confront that person without getting a physical, verbal or emotional backlash, then you should see a counselor. It is good to confront a person face to face to deal with matters of manipulation but if the person is not safe or you're not sure, don't confront them. It may bounce back on you when you do. A counselor can therefore help here. If this video helped you, subscribe to our channel. We love you.