 The Craft Foods Company, makers of parquet margarine, presents Willard Waterman as the Great Gildesleeve. Each week at this time, the Great Gildesleeve is brought to you, partially transcribed by the Craft Foods Company. Well, another New Year's Day is come and gone, and we're sure you've made some wonderful resolutions for the new year that's just beginning, but there's no law against making a New Year's resolution on January 2nd as well as January 1st. So here's the resolution we'd like to recommend to you as a conscientious homemaker. This year, make your budget dollars go further. Make your family menus better by serving and using what millions consider the world's finest margarine, parquet margarine made by craft. Parquet, the margarine that tastes so good because it's always fresh, the only margarine that brings craft quality right to your table. Parquet is wonderful as a spread, a seasoning, or a shortening. You can get it at your grocers in the regular package, the handy color quick bag, or where state laws permit golden parquet in yellow quarters. The moment you taste it, you'll know you've found the quality margarine you're proud to serve at your table. Get P-A-R-K-A-Y, parquet margarine made by craft. Two things. He either resolves to improve his position or he surveys his situation with satisfaction and pats himself on the back. The great Gilda Sleeve is pretty well satisfied and when he pats himself on the back, he uses both hands. Right, George. Here's my name and the paper again. You are the commissioner, Throckmorton P. Gilda Sleeve, wishes all his customers a happy New Year's. Hey, that's yesterday's paper, huh? You know, it isn't Leroy. I had them run the ad two days. They want anyone to miss it. Yeah, I'm happy, so at the beginning of this new year, I want to wish everybody else happy. What are you so happy about? I'm the city water commissioner. Yeah, I know. Leroy. Hello, Auntie Leroy. Hi. Yeah, Marjorie. Is Bronco home yet? Not yet, my dear. I'm so anxious to hear if he got his new job. Oh, Auntie, won't it be wonderful if Bronco moves to the Somerville Realty Company? Well, Marjorie had always amused me to watch the eager beavers running around the first of the year changing jobs. But, Auntie, it's a larger firm than he's with now. There's a better future. Perhaps. If a woman man skips around so much, he loses his identity. Why do you suppose my name is synonymous with water? Because you put an ad in the paper every New Year's. No, Leroy, because I've been on the same job for 10 years. People have come to depend on me for water. Nobody can even take a bath without me. With Bronco, things are different. He's young, ambitious, and he'll be making so much more money. Well, money isn't everything. Heck, no. It just buys everything. Well, I have some things that can't be bought. Good health, contentment, security. Well, Bronco thinks he'll get all that in his new job. Yes, he'll. These days, they offer you the moon. Look at this ad in the Somerville Indicate. Kemi Products Corporation has good job for you. We need executives, engineers, machinists. High pay, short hours, long vacations with pay. Gosh, I'll have to school and then pay them all through summer vacations. Well, Leroy, if you believe this ad, the fella can get almost anything he wants. Yeah, listen to this. Get your application blank today. Enjoy rapid advancement with this large company which is expanding with Somerville. Opportunity is knocking. Open the door to your future. Well, that sounds good. Unky, if Bronco doesn't go with Somerville Realty, he might get a good job out there. Oh, my goodness. You know how that proves my point. You just like Bronco. You want to change jobs every time his livery boy throws a newspaper on the front porch. Every time... Oh, there's Bronco now. It doesn't bink crossby. Every time it rains, it rains pennies from heaven. Bronco, you got the job. Yeah, but it doesn't rain in pennies, Marge. It's raining dollars. Oh, Bronco. Hello, everybody. Well, congratulations, Bronco. Yeah. If you think there's changing jobs, there's a thing to do. Oh, I'm not just changing jobs. I'm climbing up. I'm sales manager. Sales manager? Oh, darling, how wonderful. How much do you make? Leroy. We don't ask things like that. If Bronco wants to tell us, we'd like to know. But we don't ask. We have to volunteer the information. Well, I want the first paycheck to be a surprise to Marge. So I'll just write the figure on this envelope for you. Oh, Bronco, you tease. There you are, Uncle Morton. Well, for a young man changing to another company, that isn't a bad monthly salary. Monthly? That's my weekly salary. I just forget it. Weekly salary. Zeke. Honk, it's trying to pale. Bronco must be making more than you do. Oh, I'm so thrilled, Bronco. Come over here and tell your little wife all about it. Uncle, may Bronco sit in your big chair? Well, Marge, I shouldn't sit in the commissioner's chair. Go ahead, sit in it. Sure, I'll sit on the piano stool. Is it Mr. Bronco? Oh, Bertie. What's good news about you? Bertie, he's sales manager of Summerfield Realty. Sales manager? Ain't that something? Yeah, Bronco's the big boss. Oh, yes, yes. Well, Bertie, how's dinner coming along? Coming right up, Mr. Gale, please. Soon as I hear about the new big boss. I thought I was the big boss around here. Well, Bertie, he's in charge of all the salesmen, and he's making a lot more money. Hey, Bronco, how about a buck for the Moorish tonight? Yeah. You don't ask Bronco for money. You ask me. I didn't want you to turn pale again. No. Bronco Gile, you must be tired after such a successful day. I'll get your slippers for you. Thank you, Mrs. Thompson. I'll go get your pipe. They used to wait on me that way. Human is a big, fat job. Bertie, I'd like to do something, too. Anything special, a new boss boss for dinner? Well, how about some of your hot biscuits, Bertie? Yes, a hot biscuit for the new boss. Thank you, Bertie. Yes, the bird is going big. Hot biscuits for the new boss. Excuse me, do you know what the bird is going to do? Yes, Bertie. That's right. What a commissioner you deserted like a dried up waterhole. Have you finished with that paper, Moorish? Moorish? No, I haven't. Where's that at about those big paying jobs? I was really excited last night. I don't want to answer this ad. I've been very happy here in the water department. I go to the military, it gets in my hair. Always snooping around like a toy bloodhound. Let me read this ad again. Opportunity is knocking. Open the door to your future. No, I won't answer it. Oop, that's not opportunity. That's Judge Hooker. Killian, Judge. My, my, you must have been concentrating hard. Yeah, I guess I was. I just stopped and yelled at the wish you a belated happy new year. You're the same to you, Judge. I see you're reading an employment ad. Me? What's happened? As the Water Commission had been receiving letters from his customers saying he's all wet. No, Judge, my customers are my best friends. In fact, I command more respect from them than I do at home. What's the matter, Gilday? Bronco came home last night with a new job. He did? Darn good job, too. Better than I've got. In fact, he'll be making a lot of money. Good for Bronco. I always felt he had a brilliant future. Stop praising Bronco, you old goat. I hear enough of that around the house. Gilday, I'm surprised at you. What do you mean? It's very obvious that because of the accolade that Bronco's received, you feel that you have to outdo him. You are jealous. Jealous of my own son-in-law? Ridiculous. If you take my advice, you won't answer that ad. You shouldn't expect to keep pace with Bronco. You must realize, as I have, that the noble old tree must someday fall to make room for the strong young sapling. No, I must stomp. But there are compensations if you'll only seek them out. Where do you find them? Well, Gilday, I found solace in new interests and activities. For instance, on the second Tuesday of every month, I attend the smiling at 60 class. Smiling at 60 class? There are smiles that make us happy. Oh, Gilday. There are smiles that make us brilliant. Gilday, stop it, please. Well, that's the way we open our meetings. Great. But I'm a long way from 60. Well, perhaps I can get you in as a junior member. We meet from 7 until 9, 30 for cribbage, authors, and park cheesies. You like this. Now, if you'll ever help to chart your course for the future. You bet. I'm going down and answer this ad while I can still walk. George, they were pretty nice down there at Temmie Products Corporation. Seemed impressed that the water commissioner called. And they needed executives, that's for sure. You think I'll drop in PDs and fill out this application. Hello, PD. Mr. Jones, please. What can I do for you today? PD, I wonder if I can use your prescription typewriter. How's that? Your prescription typewriter. Mr. Jones, please. You don't know how to write a prescription, unless it's H2O. PD, I have to fill this out for the Temmie Products Corporation. I just happened to drop by there, and they forced this application blank on me. They need high-part executives. And you aren't saying, well, who are you recommending? Me. My, my. How about the typewriter, PD? Well, Mr. Jones, maybe you're welcome to use it. It's back there with the pillboxes. Yes, thanks. It'll only take a few minutes. I'm going to take longer than that on my typewriter. Hey, I guess it will at that. What is this? A typewriter or a lobster trap? Well, it seems it caught a crab this time. Yeah, all right, PD. Now, let's see. Because they filled in my name. All I have to do is list my qualifications. You're stuck already? No, PDs. Yeah, let's see. How long is your present job? Well, 10 years in water. Most very high. PD, this is important. I understand the camera product has put up a pretty big plan here in Summerfield. Oh, you'd be amazed, PD. They've got branches all over the country. It's a big outfit. Oh, I hear. Now, I need some important men for recommendations. I'll put down Judge Hooker and Police Chief Gates. No, they won't do. It's too much like I'm involved with the law. Yeah, I can put down Rums and Burd. He doesn't like me, but he's out of town. Oh, my goodness, PD, why don't you do something about this typewriter? The keys keep sticking, and the back spacer won't work. That's the only thing. If you don't like my typewriter, why don't you do the work at your office? Well, I'm afraid the mayor might catch you. I'm not afraid, PD, because you know how nosy he is. No reason to get him upset before I have the new job. Yeah, he might fire you before you can quit. PD, my qualifications are so good, anybody would be a fool to fire me. Well, we may find out. Hello, Mr. Mayor. Oop, here he is. Good morning, Mr. PD. What can I do for you? Give me a pot of my favorite pipe tobacco. OK, well. Thank you. Killed a sleeve. Is that you back there? Hello, Mr. Mayor. Where? Well, I'm surprised to see you behind the prescription counter. You trying to qualify as Mr. PD's delivery boy? Yeah, oh, no. I'm just hunting and pecking at the typewriter. The mayor sees that he's pecking, he'll be hunting. All right. You have a typewriter at the office that isn't used very much, killed a sleeve. You have. I was by your office, and there was nobody there. Well, I was there. You bet I left. That's not a good way to start the new year, give the sleeve, unless you're serious about becoming Mr. PD's delivery boy. Good day, Mr. PD. Stop being a game. You didn't say goodbye to me. He practically told you goodbye. You're going to just fly insinuations. As soon as I fill out this application, I'm going to write my letter to resignation. You'd better read it with asbestos gloves. Now, don't do anything you'll regret, Mr. PD. PD, when I leave city hall, it's the mayor who'll regret it. Well, I wouldn't say that. There's one simple reason why so many people prefer parquet margarine to any other spread, seasoning, or shortening. It tastes so good. And it tastes so good because it's always fresh. Parquet is made fresh by craft from selected products of American farms. It's rushed fresh to your store in refrigerated trucks. It's kept fresh by your grocer until you buy it. And every package of parquet margarine is flavor dated. Grocery stocks are checked regularly by craft representatives. That's why craft can assure you that any package of parquet you buy anywhere, anytime, will be fresh, really fresh. And that's why it tastes so good. Tomorrow when you shop, get a pound of parquet margarine, taste it, and discover how good a craft-made, craft-protected margarine can be. Wonderful as a spread, a seasoning, or a shortening. Get parquet in a regular package, the handy color-quick bag, or wear state laws permit yellow parquet in golden quarters. Yes, parquet margarine made by craft. The great jealous-leaf son-in-law, Bronco, came home with a fine new job, and usurped the position of popular idol of the household. But the great jealous-leaf isn't easily dethroned. He's looking for greener pastures himself. Gee, a lot of people are applying for work at this plant. This line's a block long. Well, I don't see many of the executive type. Oh, madam, please stop pushing. Yes, darn cop. Assisting I stand in line, too. You'd better watch it. Rock, Morton, please, jealous-leaf. Yes, that's me. Yes! Please step out of line and come into the office. You bet! Goodbye, madam. Step in here, Mr. jealous-leaf, and close the door. Yes, thank you. I'm Mr. Johnson, the personnel director. I'm Mr. jealous-leaf. I know. Sit down, Mr. jealous-leaf. Yeah, after you. Yo, you're already down. I see you're on time for your interview this morning. Yes, indeed. Johnny in the spot, Jerry at the rattle. Yes. Mr. jealous-leaf, we've gone over your application very carefully, and we are interested in you. Well, fine. You hold quite a responsible position here in Summerfield. Would you care to tell us why you want to make a change? You know my son-in-law is making more money than I am. Yeah, I mean. I see you have a sense of humor. That's important for an executive. Mr. jealous-leaf, when can you come to work for us? Almost immediately, Mr. Johnson. Of course, I'll have to give the mayor notice, but that won't take long. Good. I can see you move fast, and so does Kemi Products Corporation. We'll call you tomorrow about your assignment and the terms. You mean money? You may rest assured that you'll be making more than you do now. Great. Those are the kind of terms I like. George, wait until the mayor opens this envelope. I really told him off. It'll be the first five pages letter of resignation he ever received. Yeah, now, just put it here on the map over now. I'm not going to mail it until I get that phone call from Mr. Johnson. And I'm no fool. You know, I won't tell the family yet, either. Coming, Bertie. Yeah, I guess everybody's started. I better get in there before Bronco takes my place at the head of the table. Good morning, Auntie. Hi, Aunt. Good morning, kitties. Bronco. Morning. Pull up a chair, Mort. Oop. Thank you. You have your all ahead of me this morning. Yeah, Bronco's in a hurry, so we thought we'd eat with him. Oh, yes. Bronco has to get down early, Auntie. Yeah, my new job entails a number of heavy responsibilities. So you've got heavy responsibilities. You're making heavy sales. It's truly right, true. I don't know why I came in. Nobody's offered me any breakfast. One more sip of coffee, and I have to go down and give my salesman a pep talk. For a coffee, Mr. Bronco? Oh, Miss Kilsoo, you're here. Yes, Bertie, I've been here. Yes. I'll get you breakfast just as soon as I take care of Mr. Bronco. Is your coffee, Mr. Bronco? Just half a cup, Bertie. Bronco, Bronco, Bronco. Here's the cream and sugar, darling. Thank you, Marjorie. All right, George, it's time for me to fight back. Yeah, I wanted to know what I'm up to, but I don't know I'm up to something pretty big. Now, Miss Kilsoo, I'll be right back with your breakfast. Yeah, I'm making a big one, Bertie. Yes, sir. I want a big breakfast, Chitty, because big things are afoot. Well, gotta go. I have a good day, Bronco. Don't be too hard on the salesman. Yeah, I say, big things are afoot. Hey, all. What's up, Bronco? You're well. Any minute now, I'll have big news for all of you. You financially speaking, there's going to be a little more money in the pocket this year. Giving up smoking, are you? All right, boy, with the money I'll be making, I can smoke cigars a foot long and light them with $5 bills. Yeah? What's going to happen, Anki? Where are you going to get all the money? Yeah, kiddies, let's not get too curious. I'll tell you when the time comes. But it's big, very big. Well, I've got to go. Congratulations, Mort. Don't know what for, but congratulations. I'll see you to the door, darling. See you all at dinner. You bet you will. All right, Bronco. Here's your breakfast with skill seats. Everything you like. Yeah, thank you, baby. I guess you were out of the room when I told the children the big news. What big news? That there's going to be big news. Yes, indeed. I'll get it. Yeah, I'll get it, buddy. I think I know who it is. Do you want me to answer the phone, Anki? No, Marjorie, I'll get it. Hello. Talk more than Pete Gillespie speaking. Mr. Gillespie, this is Mr. Johnson of Kemi Products Corporation. Oh, yes, indeed, Mr. Johnson. We've had our meeting, and we'd like you to come in and talk about money. Fine. Nothing I'd rather talk about. And we've decided where you'll best fit into our organization. Good. You don't mind a little driving, do you? You don't know. I plan to drive to work. Well, we need you in Albuquerque. You had eye to do with it. Albuquerque! You make some noise. Can you drive out there next week? Albuquerque. And what do you say, Mr. Gillespie? You know, it's this way, Mr. Johnson. What way? Yeah, I don't know. Well then, take it over, Mr. Gillespie. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Goodbye. Yeah, goodbye. What's the matter, Rocky? You madder? You're not sure I can't leave you and the Leroy? What are you talking about? Nothing, my dear. I'm glad I didn't mail my resignation to the mayor. Say, where's that letter? What letter? The one that was on the mail. Oh, Bronco was going by the post office, so he mailed it for you. Oh! I can't go to Albuquerque. You're my lawyer. What am I going to do? You must be guilty of already done it. I didn't come to your office to be reminded of that. I need help. Why don't you go to the post office and try to retrieve your letter to the mayor? I did. Would you ever try to get a letter back from Uncle Sam? Well, no. In the time I'd filled out that long form at the post office, my letter had gone out in the afternoon delivery. Well, there'll be old Billy to pay now. Let us start for 1952. I promised the little family I'd have big news for them today. When the mayor reads your letter, there'll be big news all right. Judge, I've burned my bridges behind me. I can't leave town to take a job, and I can't stay in town without one. Yeah, baby. Only thing for you to do is to go to the mayor and try to get back your letter of resignation before he opens it. You know, we might beat the postman. He delivers about this time. You come on, judge. What do you want me to do? You come down the hall to the mayor's office with me. If he gets violent, I want a witness. Well, he'll help you out. Oh, I have to get that letter. I won't be able to face the family. Ronco's ruler of the roost is home now. If I go back without a job, they probably won't even speak to me. Mr. Mayor? Who is it? Me and my lawyer. Yeah, I mean... Gildersleeve. How many Gildersleeve? Come in. Hello, Mr. Mayor. Afternoon, Your Honor. Judge, I'm... Mr. Mayor, I see the afternoon has been delivered. And you're opening the mail. What do you usually do with mail? Yeah, Mr. Mayor. Do you mind if I look through the stack? Gildersleeve, get your hands off my desk. I'm busy reading a very interesting letter. Five pages long. It's mine. No, no, no, no. No. Where? Anyone else knows. God, what crush. No, Mr. Mayor. Then I think you're a tight-fisted old rooster. Ten-horn politician. Gildersleeve. Oh, wait. This is the most outrageous. I'll shoot you. I'll... Let's get out of here, Gildersleeve. Gildersleeve, I'm going to... Yes. Yes. Uh... Gildersleeve. Uh... Yeah. You cannot judge it. Wait a minute, Gildersleeve. Uh, why there must be some mistake? He's still in the employer's city of Somerfield. Why, I realize that, yes. Oh, oh, you do. Well, I'm very sorry. Good day, sir. You are, I... Uh, Gildersleeve. That was a Mr. Johnson at the Kemi Products Company. You didn't go over there and apply for a position, did you? You see, Mr. Mayor... They're trying to steal my key, man. After all the years you've been with us, those pirates... Yes, they forced you to write that letter to me. Well, I can see through their tricks. Gildersleeve, you aren't going to leave our little family, are you? Leave? So, Mr. Mayor, I... I intended to give you a raise today. Another $25 a month. Just think, Gilday, and you would have stayed for nothing. Look! What's this? Well, as a matter of fact, Mr. Mayor, I decided not to take that other job. Oh, I see. Well, then it won't be necessary to give you a raise. Oh, yes it will. Oh, that's why I'm here. I'm a witness. Here I'm, Judge. Let's go tell the big news to the little family. The Great Gildersleeve will be right back. When you go to your grocers tomorrow, pick up a pound of parquet margarine, the craft quality margarine that tastes so good because it's always fresh. Get parquet in the regular package, the color quick bag, or yellow parquet in golden quarters. Use it as a spread, a seasoning, and a shortening. For every use, it's the margarine that tastes so good. P-A-R-K-A-Y. Parquet margarine made by craft. You gather around, everybody. I have something to tell you. What is it, Auntie? Oh, what's here? What happened, Doc? Well, your old uncle took another big step up the ladder of success. I got a fine raise in souring. Oh, really, Auntie? How do you do it? I simply went to the mayor and put my foot down. Good men are hard to find, and he knows... Oh boy, redecorated. But last you can get a new car, buy yourself a couple of new suits. Yes, but... Ronco, we won't have to borrow the $5,000 from the bank to build our house. We can borrow it from Uncle Mars. The side house. He'd have been kiddies. $25 a month. This is the most expensive raise I ever got. Good night, folks. Big Gillis Leave is played by Willard Waterman. The show is written by John Elliott and Andy White. It is partially transcribed. Included in the cast are Walter Tetley, Barry Lee Robb, Lillian Randolph, Dick Crenna, Stanley Perrard, Joe Forte, Earl Ross and Dick Legrand. This is John Easton saying good night for the Kraft Foods Company, makers of the famous line of Kraft quality food products. Be sure to listen in next Wednesday and every Wednesday for the further adventures of the great Gillis Leave. What's the best way to raid an icebox? Answer with Kraft Prepared Mustard, of course. Because when you add a little Kraft mustard to the sandwich you make, you add a lot of tang. And here's something for you professional icebox raiders to remember. There are two kinds of Kraft mustard. Mild Kraft mustard with that delicately spiced smooth flavor. Ah, and then there's Kraft mustard with snappy horseradish added. Have both kinds on hand. Then you won't meet up with a dish, but what you'll have just the mustard to add a lot of tang. Buy Kraft's Prepared Mustard. Groucho Marx, you bet your life. He's next on NBC.