 emotional intelligence in social interactions. Let me begin the story. Story of King Ambarisha. King Ambarisha. King Ambarisha is a great king. King Ambarisha was a great king. He was ruling the whole India, whole India, whole India. He was the king. He was the king. He had a very Thayas king and very great king and very much God-loving, God-fearing, very Thayas tharmic king. He was the Vishnu Bhakti. He was a Vishnu Bhakta. And his wife was also a great devotee of Lord Vishnu. So what happened? What happened? They go through a lot of vratas, a lot of fasting vratas in year-round vratas, every Ekadasi. Ekadasi they used to have the vratas. So you say year-long vratas and finally that special Ekadasi has come which is the big thing. Big thing that day you have to go completely fasting and at the break of Ekadasi vratas you have to break your fast and you have to eat something. So this is he was going through the vratas. So at that time on that day what happens? What happens? The sage Durvasa comes to the court of King Ambarisha along with his followers along with his Srisagana. Srisagana they all come there to the king. Ambarisha receives them with all the dignity, all the honor because Durvasa was a great sage, Maharishi. Maharishi so he invites them, receives them and requests him to have his food there, to have his food. The king Durvasa says, let me go to the river, have my bath and other things and come back and have the food. So the king goes to the nearby river for having his bath and he has to come back and he was not coming back and that moment, that moment where the vratas, the fasting has to be broken by eating something, the moment is fast arriving and Durvasa was not coming back and the king was thinking without, without serving the food for the great sage, my guest Atiti Devabha to the Maharishi, Durvasa is there without giving food to the Durvasa. He could not teach, it is not proper manners, it is not proper for the king to, you know, that means this was in the sage, so he was waiting and waiting and waiting and Durvasa was not returning and if he would not break the fast at that time, then time, then all the vratas, all the effort that he had put in the year and all would go waste. So he was worried what to do, then Vasistha was also there in the court. He guides him, he tells him, you do one thing, you have some, you have some, you know, Tulasi Tirtha, a few drops, a few drops of Tulasi Tirtha, Pancham Bruta, whatever you take it and then wait. So you do not have to eat the whole food but have that Pancham Bruta or whatever it is, have it and that means you have broken the fast and the vratas are successful and let the sage come at any time, then you can serve him the food and accordingly the king breaks his fast by eating that Pancham Bruta. Then Durvasa enters and Durvasa was sitting there and the food was being served by the king but Durvasa was so powerful, he could see the past, he could see, you know, he could see this vision, he could see this king had already eaten without serving me food, he is a disrespect, how could you do this? He made a claim, he got so much annoyed, he threw the food out there, he stood up and with all the powers that he had, he created a monster, he created a monster and released the monster onto Ambarisha. What did Ambarisha do? Ambarisha immediately with his folded hands, he prayed to the god that he believed it. As he prayed, immediately Sudarshan Chakra appeared in between and the Sudarshan Chakra had cut the monster into two halves, cut the monster, after destroying the monster, the Sudarshan Chakra was still revolving, looking for the guy who created the monster. Then it started chasing, it started chasing Durvasa and Durvasa ran from there to Shiva, Shiva please save me, Shiva said, I cannot, went to Brahma, Brahma said, finally he went to Vishnu, please save me, protect me. Then Vishnu also said, I cannot do anything, once the Chakra is released, you have to go to the person whose prayers were heard and it happened and then, this is how the sage was running, as Sudarshan Chakra was chasing him and finally he says, go back to the person, so that Durvasa came back and fell at the feet of Ambarisha. And Ambarisha, oh my god, all this, what are you doing? Come on, please, please forgive me, but he was asking for forgiveness and the sage was feeling very bad and he asked for forgiveness and the sage was received and the Sudarshan Chakra was withdrawn at that time. This is the story, but what happened to the sage? What happened to the sage? The question is what happened to the sage? He was a great sage to get those powers, to get these powers years and years of penance in the forest without eating, drinking even water, years and years they do penances to obtain these powers, but what happened on this day, in the feet of Anga, in that fraction of the moment, he could not control his own anger and use all those powers for creating the monster and he lost them, he lost them, he lost all those powers for which he did so much of hard work, so much effort, everything just because he could not control his emotions, his emotions of anger, in that moment he lost them. So that is the importance of having emotional intelligence and not having emotional intelligence. One is not emotional intelligence, imagine the loss, imagine the loss that one, you know it has been happening, it has been happening and I have had my own experience in life, I am sure you too have your experience in life, this is the topic which you are all aware of it, which you are all aware of it. Can you, can anyone recognize the names of the people, what they are on the screen, can somebody tell me the name, who is this, who is this sitting up there, sitting down here, do you know this combination, who these two people are, if you could recognize please unmute, yes, yes, Vijay Kumar ji, Vijay Kumar ji, did you also, did you say that? Yes sir, yes sir, yes sir. Fantastic, absolutely, this is Dhritarastra and this is Sanjaya, Sanjaya, you know Sanjay, whereas as the Kurukshetra battle was being fought, in fact Dhritarastra was sitting here, Sanjay was explaining to him, Sanjay was telling him the every day, whatever Sanjay has the power of seeing whatever is happening there and he was describing it, Dhritarastra what's happening here and that time you know if you go through, if you go through even the, you know there's one sloka, there's one sloka and in that sloka it says Sanjay Abhuvaja, Yatra Yogeshwara Krishna, Yatra Bhadhu Dhanudhara, Tattrasvir Vijayo, Hootil Dhruva, Neethil Matil Mamam, Yatra Yogeshwara Krishna, where there is the Krishna, who is in the calm, quite like a yogi, Yatra Yogeshwara Krishna, where there's a yogi like balanced, emotionally balanced Krishna was there, Yatra Bhadhu Dhanudhara where there's a skillful, skillful Dhanudhara, skillful Archa, Padha, Arjuna was there, wherever there is the yogi like the cool, calm, quiet, balanced, emotionally balanced person like Krishna is there and where there's a skillful person, skillful, all skillful person like Arjuna was there, Tattrasvir Vijayo, Hootil Dhruva, Neethil, there, the Vijayam, the Vijayam is certain, for sure, for sure the victory is certain on the earth and where Hootil Dhruva, Neethil Matil Mamam, wherever it is, the victory is certain. So, what is that? I am saying it here, that means it is even in one person, if you are so skillful, you are highly skillful, but you don't have that emotional intelligence, your victory cannot be certain and you alone being emotionally intelligent will have no skills that is also not good, but having skills along with the skills, along with the knowledge, if you're also having emotional intelligence, emotionally intelligence, that is the combination which will help you become successful, for sure, for sure, that's what I see here. Combination, combination of Krishna and Arjuna, combination of skills and the emotional balance, that makes you assured, being up and a great champion, a great champion, great champion. We all see a lot of the IQ, IQ, somebody is intelligent, somebody is all that, for somebody is successful, somebody is very successful, we see that on the surface of it, what is visible is their knowledge, their skills, this is the thing, skills and knowledge, their qualifications, their MSC, PhD or their skills of speaking, skills of talking, skills of dealing with the people, skills, their knowledge, their research, the publications and whatever it is, that is only 10% the knowledge, the intelligence, the intelligence question IQ. But what is not seen, but what is actually contributing to the person's success like an iceberg, like an iceberg, they're 80, 90% of it below the surface, so below the surface within that, the emotional intelligence of the person, emotional intelligence of the person, that matters a lot for such a person, for such a person, that's what you say. So then what is the emotion, what is the emotion, what is an emotion? Emotion is the feeling, emotion, emotion is something in your mind, it's an emotion in the mind, in the brain, especially in the brain, especially in the right side of the brain, your right part of the brain, right brain is the one which controls your emotions, your intuitions, your spirituality, your Kalapatvam, your feelings, your creativity, your creativity, those are the things that are controlled by your right brain. And your left brain is the one about your IQ part, your IQ part is controlled by the left brain, your logic, your analytical skills, your number skills, your number skills, your data interpretation, your logical thinking, your rational approaches and all that, it's covered, it's on this side of the brain that is left brain, but it's the right brain that you have to be. And usually we are all developing, we are in the pursuit while we are in the college, while we are in the school, we're all developing the knowledge part, the mugging part, the gaining knowledge part, and this part of it. And after that actually instead of developing this part, instead of developing this part, there is some kind of teacher generation happening in this part, because people after that, if you look at maybe, I don't know where the kind of food we eat, the kind of people we are around, with the kind of situations we are going through, people are becoming more emotionally reactive nowadays than before. So, so this is where area of concern, area of concern where we have to give conscious attention, so that we could be, we could stop the deterioration, we could build that emotional interest. And happy in this session, like to interact with you on this. So, mainly you know this part, this right side part, right part of the brain is all these things, then the left part is all the numbers, the left part is all the numbers thing, and the right side part of the brain is something that gives us, okay? Now, now, can I have, can I have in the chart box the different kinds of emotions that oh, you can see that they have, you can see that but let me stop it, so let me see what you will write, okay? I want you to open the chart box and write down there the different kinds of emotions, the different kinds of emotions that we humans go through. What are the different kinds of emotions that we the humans go through at different times? The kind of emotions can I have them written in the chart box, come on. The emotions, what are the different types of, fairly good, Dr. Shivukumar writes anger, sadness, excitement. Yes, certainly, anger is an emotion, sadness is an emotion, dukkha, dukkha, anger, fear is also an emotion, 100%, an excitement, you know, you are very excited. Yes, there is also an emotion, absolutely. There are many, many other emotions. Humans go through a variety of emotions, variety, joy, anger, happiness, sumangala man, thank you so much, joy, anger, happiness, joy, and bliss, bliss, you know, you are happy, you are joyful, and you are blissful. Again, different levels of emotion of happiness there, happy, satisfaction is satisfaction, satisfaction is also a, satisfaction, feeling, bliss, feeling, bliss, feeling, bliss and anxiety in, you know, today if you go to Facebook or you go to WhatsApp also, you know, once you write something and at the end of it, you can express your emotions or you sad or you happy, doubly happy, triply happy, lovingly happy, you can put, you know, you put a circle on the head, you put three love symbols on the head, you know, you have different colors of love symbols there and flowers, water, crying, crying, crying, sad and crying, pride, being proud, pride, yeah, that's also a feeling, shame, absolutely, that is also a feeling, absolutely. Jyothi, Raval ma'am, absolutely even shame is also a feeling, exactly. Yeah, shyness, shyness and also shame, both are there, both are there. Yeah, that's also a feeling, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, curiosity, anxiety, anxiety, worry, worry, worry, confusion, confusion is also a state of emotion, right, what else, what else, what else, what else, very good, very good, thank you, thank you so much, that's right, yes, yes, look at those emotions, look at the number of kind of emotions, happy, sad, content, satisfied, that's what you said, angry, grumpy, there's another word called grumpy, confused, tired, scared, fear, you said fear, scared, frightened, another degree, degree of fear, get hurt, somebody's hurting, you're feeling hurt in your heart, depressed, anxious, anxiety, yes, nervousness, nervousness before the interview, before going to the boss, before something, you know, that nervousness, being thoughtful, silly, annoyed, frustrated, bored, excited, surprised, proud and pride, you said, interested, out of control and embarrassed, sometimes you feel embarrassed, okay, so these are different kinds of emotions and many other kinds of emotions that we go through, many kinds of emotions go through, right, go through, go through many kinds of emotions and what is emotional intelligence, we look at now, we see one of the emotions and what is emotional intelligence, EI, what is emotional intelligence, EI, right, it is ability of an individual to recognize and understand emotions of yours and those people you in fact, it is the first ability of a person, ability of your ability to recognize and understand your own emotions and those of the people whom you are involved in with and that is not the end of it, that is not a complete intelligence, so the first place your ability to recognize and the first recognizing, then understanding the emotions of your own emotions and the person you are dealing with and then the skill to use that awareness to efficiently manage yourself and your relationships with others, so in the first place is the ability to recognize, oh, presently I am going through this emotion, what is the kind of emotion you are going through, so you are able to recognize and understand first your own emotions and when you are speaking with somebody, when you are arguing with somebody, when you are having a debate with somebody or when you are having a meeting with somebody or you know, you are talking at that time, the other person is also going through some kind of emotions so it is important for you to recognize and understand your own emotions and at the same time recognize the emotions of the other person and then accordingly it is not that you alone, this is you are dealing with another person, so what that person is presently going through, is he also angry, if he is angry should you be a bit quiet or is he excited, is he confused, is he very sad, what is the kind of feeling that he is going through right now, so understanding that and then using that awareness, so that you, you have no control on his emotions, you have no control what's involved on his or her emotions, you have control only on your emotions, so you understand your emotions and then you manage your emotions, so that you manage your relationship with those people, that is what, that is what, that's what EQ spells the difference between successful people and underage people, those people who are vastly successful, who are not so successful, what is the difference, the difference is their ability, their ability to have this emotional intelligence, that's it, so here, so there are four steps here, the first step is perceiving the emotions, you perceive in that situation, you be conscious, be aware, be aware, so right now I'm having this emotion, so perceive it first of all, your own emotions, are you sad, are you happy, are you excited, are you confused, are you becoming angry, some anger is coming out, are you becoming you know somewhat angry with whatever is going on there, so what is the kind of emotion, because your brain is hearing and then again started reacting, your right brain is working now, so but what kind of emotion your right brain is having, you perceive it first, be conscious of it and then you perceive other person's emotions, not only yours, it's important here, we have to see what is the likely, by observing that person, because in his face you can see the eyes, you can see the cheeks, you can see, you can feel when a person is angry or if a person is smiling and happy, you can feel that emotion, so understand your emotion, perceive and understand your emotion and the emotion of other person's, first perceive, understand and then use this knowledge, use that awareness, use that awareness to manage your own emotions, so first perceive, understand, use it to manage your own emotions, that's it, you cannot manage other's emotions, if you manage your own emotions, the others managing emotions will be managed by themselves, so what we have is in your control, in your control is emotional intelligence, in your control is emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence, we are talking about this, though I began with a story, story of Ambarisha and Durvasa to highlight, to highlight the importance of emotional intelligence, but can I, can I request you to kindly write down, if a person is having a good emotional intelligence, what are the benefits are, if the person is not having emotional intelligence, what are the losses, what are the losses to an individual, can I have you, you can unmute an answer or you can write in the chat box, can I have your answers please, the benefits having good emotional intelligence are the losses due to lack of emotional intelligence, yes, yeah okay, great, great, yes Dr. Shiv Kumar writes here that he will be an achiever with them, with emotional intelligence, people are better and she was higher, she was higher productivity, very good, Jyothi Raval, ma'am writes here, social personal relationships will become better with good emotional intelligence, with proper emotional balance and intelligence, we can maintain good social, social personal relationship with other people, Madhya Smita, he writes a better management of relationships at home and also in the office and also in our area of work, better management relationships are deeper at home, at home with spouse, with children, with relatives, with siblings, brothers, sister, parents, children, my god, my god, you know, we go through lots of emotions there and you know, if we don't have relation and emotional balance, there are opportunities to lose the relationships and the relationships, to develop those relationships, it has taken years and years of time, now in that feat of anger, in that fraction of movement, because of use of that one wrong word, one wrong word, now the relationship is broken, it's broken, once and for all and that's hurting, that's hurting, that's hurting, it will become easy to understand other people, if we have emotions, yes, yes, if we have emotions and emotions, emotions have to be there, emotions have to be there, it's not that emotional intelligence does not mean not having emotions, emotional intelligence means having emotions, having emotions, but the ability to deal with those, absolutely, education, it's friendly approach with other people, empathy will develop empathy, absolutely, that's a good word, good word, empathy is a good word, empathy, you put yourself in other shoes, you see from others point of view, you start looking things at others angle, in the other person's angle, that is empathy, that's empathy, if I work in your position, what I would do, how I would be there, so if I put myself in your position, that means I am becoming empathetic, very good, thank you, thank you very much, thank you very much, that's good, that's good, let's get going, let's get going, okay, okay great, great, look at this, look at this, okay, why is it helps people handle adversity, adversity and setbacks, you know, there'll be pandemic situation, big setback, big, big adversity, big adversity, oh my god, in February this year, I went through COVID infection, COVID infection, I went to Kolkata to conduct a training program for a seed company, came back, developed fever, got tested, and tested positive, what to do, oh my god, yeah, in February this year, I went through COVID infection, but I told myself, I am a guy, I am a guy, I put the song that I showed you, I'm a value, I posted it in February on my YouTube channel, when I was going through, when I was going through the COVID infection, I am a value, yes, I'm going to conquer, conquer this, of course, you know, that is an adversity, my family members are worried, my wife is worried, my children are worried, and they were asking me, would you like to go to the hospital and what do you do? I told myself, yes, this is an opportunity, god is great, he is taking me through this to make me stronger, to make me better, to make me fit up, this is the time for me, those 14, 15 days of isolation, yeah, that gave me an opportunity, yes, yeah, it helped me, it helped me, teaches people to cope with uncertainty, hits them, and, you know, working with people means working with, of course, you know, you can maintain the relationships, better relationships, your productivity will go up and the many benefits, and yes, working with people means working with emotions, period, underline, capital letters, working with people means working with emotions, because after all, human beings have the emotions, human beings have the feelings, humans have feelings, and because of the feelings, they have emotions, emotions, so we have to accept the fact we are all working with people, that means, directly we are actually working with their emotions, we are working with their emotions, so we have to work with them, we have to work with them, so how do we develop a knowledge, first of all, acknowledge that emotions are always present, and doing something interesting with them, people derail, people derail their careers because of emotional failures, not the lack of technical skills, knowledge and all that, just because you don't know, you don't, you didn't know how to deal with your boss, boss said something wrong, something utterly wrong, utterly ridiculous, meaningless, not at all proper, being the boss, being in that position, he should not have said that, it is not at all good, but what did you do when boss said that, did you have your emotions under control, you kept quiet, you allowed him to tell, he was shouting, he was using wrong words, but you took all of it, sit quietly, he looked up to him, and quietly, when the conversation is over, you walked up to the room, you walked up to the room, what are you saying, what are you doing, what did you do, what did you do, what did you do, what did you do, he is the man, the only one, what are you telling sir, what are you talking sir, this is not correct sir, did you react, what did you do that day, some people who didn't know how to deal in those difficult situations, who lost emotional balance, they derailed their careers, their career is over, I know some examples, so we have to be, there are big losses, poor EQ versus high EQ, each helping out of these two people, the two faces there, which face, this is the right one, or the left one, who you think is having higher EQ, left or right, and if the emotional intelligence is not proper, you could, people will have relationship problems at home, and poor decision making capability, rage and hang-up, and disturbances in the workplace, and failure to advance the career, failure to advance, this happened to lots of people, just because they are very knowledgeable, they are very hardworking, they have a lot of talent, they are very talented, they are very talented, but they could not advance to the career with the top position just because they do not have the emotional intelligence, just because they don't have emotional intelligence, and there are some people who are not so capable, they are not so talented, they are not so skillful, they don't have that much knowledge, but they are occupying the top positions today, how they knew how to deal with people, especially the bosses, especially the bosses, agree with me, agree with me, agree with me at least in 9 years on the chart boxes, thank you, thank you so much, so now, now we'll spend some time on how to have to deal with emotions, can we master our emotions, the question is, you know, emotions to hona chahi hai, emotions nahi hai toh, aap me aur janwar ke beech me koi andar nahi hoon tha, if those emotions, there would not be any difference between a man and an animal, being human you have to have emotions and you should enjoy those emotions, you must, when you are feeling happy, you must feel really happy, you must jump into joy and say yes, wow, my child got school first, my child got admission IIT, yes, my child got a job and I got a promotion and my meeting is successful and wow and celebrate and be happy, yeah, yes, I am, I am, very good, take care, take care, govinda, govinda, Bihari sahab, Aapka, my group, thank you sir, thank you very much, thank you, you know, but sometimes, sad things do happen, sad things do happen, you know, somebody lost someone in the family, someone is lost in the family, so it's a sad thing, they lost the family and you're feeling so sad, feel the fact, let tears flow down your eyes, let tears flow down your eyes, cry, cry, cry, thoughtfully, cry as much as you want, cry loudly, you can solve, it's part of love, sometimes the excitement, some nervousness, how is it going to be, you feel nervous, enjoy the nervousness, sometimes you know you have to be nervous, enjoy the nervousness and some confusion, you know, but enjoy the question here is, the question is whether you are having emotions or not is not the question, you have to have the emotions, you have to enjoy the emotions, but the question is whether you are having the emotions in your grip or you are in the grip of your emotions, you are in the grip of your emotions without having any control or you have the control on your emotions, that is the question, so with emotional intelligence you can have your emotions in your culture that's what but how is it possible is it easy is it easy it's easier said than done it's easier said than done but we can we can endure we can gradually develop and master we can master we can master it is something we can cultivate it is something it is something that happens yes it is possible it's possible how it is i'm thinking maybe we'll go and take it how it is can you recognize this temple where is it from what is the name of the temple and the place where it is can anyone recognize this temple my soul my soul no sir my soul no i don't know whether my soul you have this my soul architect this is the architecture in in in varissa absolutely varissa yes this is like you know in kalinga architecture it looks like this absolutely this is in varissa but not karnat where is it it is a temple it's a temple where is it you know puri yeah it looks very close to puri puri jagannad mandir also looks very much like this but this place is not puri jagannad mandir it is lingaraj yes who said that oh my god somebody recognized it great absolutely this is lingaraja mandir in bhubaneshwap vaneshwap bhubaneshwap ishwap has chosen the place to come and reside in lingaraja temple my god it's a very very old temple and in the temple premises you have nearly 108 or 120 temples within the premises of this lingaraja mandir temple you know about five six years ago i happened to go to i happened to go to you know bhubaneshwap to conduct a training program for nagarjuna group companies sales people they all came from different parts of the country we flew down on the 17th of that month june or july i don't remember june 17th i remember the date and we went there and that day that was day one the local manager said sir we have we were actually taking kalinga institute of technology and science which is about 12 to 13 kilometers away from away from this temple so he said sir we have lingaraja mandir would you like to go and see myself and two other friends from hyderabad dr mahala and mr ravicky shop we three went from hyderabad to do the training program so what happened sir piaz next year should we will go and then he gave us he gave us his vehicle drive up and you know as we left that place and there's not much of rain as we went towards the temple you know as we were approaching he started raining cats and dogs oh my god when we were there in front of the temple it was pouring rain was heavy what to do should we get down when we even to see that there's a blackout and there's no power busily kivi in a cutting game you know the electricity was cut no electricity at that time it was raining kya kare should we continue to stay there that's already evening around six or seven o'clock so we came back manager ne puja dasan kaisa was up how many believe that dasan nahi walk because because it is not so much of rain here but there was so much of rain there so he said don't worry sir tomorrow you can go tomorrow after the training program at the end of the program you can go so next day again the program was over by six six thirty it's over immediately we went we had our shower and all that and we changed the clothes and we want to go for dasan around seven o'clock so we started and on the way there is one iskan mandir you know a friend of mine called from that mandir said we want to come so i asked these two please please please and they told us clearly one thing this lingaraj mandir clothes said eight o'clock so you have to go before that i said it is only seven fifty seven twenty we'll quickly go to iskan mandir and we'll go and then we went there and by seven fifty ten minutes before eight o'clock itself we were there right in front of lingaraj mandir and as we were getting down from the car somebody came in front of us said sir mandir bandho bhaiya mandir bandh hai api hey kaisi bandho bhaiya it's not eight o'clock it's only seven fifty this no sir today there are no special pujas or something kona jaldi he bandho gait cut close to you know we what to do came back again two fifteen kilometers manajra sir dasan kaisi hawa it did not happen when today so don't worry tomorrow again but the next day evening we were to take the flight back to heithrabad so he said go in the morning sir go in the morning because the training starts at nine o'clock so we thought okay six six o'clock we'll go and we'll have dasan come back our maharasab said no we cannot come sir ravikeshwar maharasab we too we too we agreed and we got up at five o'clock and we in those white clothes paisma kutta and all that you know we went there by six o'clock itself we were there boom body was there only two of us you know we waited we waited till six thirty the temple's cobra's main door to be opened you know six thirty it got open and we went inside and then you know and then the main temple was also not to open here so we visited few more temples and finally we went there and we went there there are two or three other people nobody was there you know we were asked to stand in the distance the garbhagraha the sanctum sanctorum in fact is away from that place and some some pujaris they did some puja and then what they did they removed this robe and they asked us to come in and we went into the sanctum sanctorum the garbhagraha we were there for ten fifteen minutes doing arjuna and all those things we asked them to do it and we had such a great time wonderful harihara harihara you can see both of them there that is called lingaraj mandir inside the garbhagraha we were there for ten fifteen minutes and you know when we came out when we came out ravikeshwar asked me so do you know why we did not get darshan yesterday and day before so why usually the evening time darshan happened from that place for you won't be allowed to come into the there's a lot of crowd in the rope you'll be kept you have to see from the distance only in the morning at that time only you're allowed inside sir Bhagawan Leja Bambu it na acha darshan dena chaate hain o kala prasukh kya andhraana jayate the god did not allow us inside yesterday and before because he wanted to give us this beautiful blissful darshan yesterday what day for yesterday what we're feeling so sad away yeah that's a new one our aglaze darshan who are both if we had that's an ability we would not have gone and we would not have got this kind of darshan so when something happened you know we felt bad but can can we take it everything happens for good if we can take it because we go through like we go through lots of ups and downs lots of incidents in life so can we believe in the philosophy our philosophy our ancestral Indian philosophy everything happens for good you agree with me agree with me please right right later jeep let it jeep for good let it jeep you know i'll tell you one more small story here one more one more small story here you know amita bachchan amita bachchan's father's name is harivan charai bachchan harivan charai bachchan harivan charai bachchan harivan charai bachchan was a great poet indeed poet even i i remember reading his poem one of his poems as my poetry book you know in 10th standard or so it's a great poet and those days when amita bachchan was a kid he was admitted to a school in 90 dollar boarding school because he was going to do harivan charai bachchan in kakhandan he was a very well to do person had enough money so he had sent his son to a boarding school so amita bachchan was studying in a boarding school in fact this story was shared by amita bachchan himself in one of the shows you know he he shared this so he said in amita bachchan was he was preparing that was the annual day celebrations the parents were all coming his parents were also to come amita bachchan wanted to give a pleasant surprise to his parents so he was preparing what he was doing he was he was practicing singing one of the poems of his own father so he wanted to go to the stage that day and he wanted to sing and make his parents proud and happy but then what happened on that day amita bachchan got some fever and health issues so immediately he had to be taken to hospital and he was admitted in the hospital his parents came to the school they were sent they were told that son was in the school hospital so they also went to the hospital their amita bachchan was lying on the bed very much frustrated very much depressed very much depressed so father asked him bitter cow what happened why are you so sad what happened papa you know i planned one thing and something else happened i'm very sad and very you know depressed so what happened so papa i practiced like this i did so much of practice i planned so much i did so much of practice i wanted to present from the stage and look at now all my plans have gone now i'm in this hospital bed that's why i'm not happy then his father told him you know jobi aapka jab aapka manki baap jab aapke manki baap hota hain hua chah jab nahi hota hain aur bhi achah then is when you think of something and it happens it's good and if it does not happen it is better he said papa how how is it better then his father told him better when it is not happening according to your plan it is happening according to his plan and his plan for you is always better than your own plan for you because he knows from your first day to the last day for the entire journey he knows and he knows what is best for you something is not happening according to your plan and his plan is better that's why whatever happens happens for good happens for good can we go with that so can we think whatever happens happens for our good only yes or yes hello can you unmute and answer you have the power to unmute just press that red button unmute answer and immediately mute it can we think whatever happens happens for our good only yes sir thank you ma'am thank you so much thank you thank you sir please unmute and immediately mute mute but unmute it can you can you people recognize this person what is the sport he plays and what is his name can someone recognize this person he is a black player an American player he has won the grand slams bimbuldon champion as well as us open champion he's won a couple of champion ships he won the bimbuldon champ he was a great player what's his name he was born in 1943 he became bimbuldon champ in 1975 he contracted HIV AIDS in 1988 and he died in 1993 and his name is Arthur Ash jr what a champion he was he was a great champion on the court and a great human of the court people loved him he used to have fans all over the world all over the world and he had some issues he had to go to the hospital for some blood related infusion and in that process he contracted HIV sadly you know by the time he realized it was too late and he knew that he would be dying soon and even the world knew that he would be dying soon and he was getting a number of letters from his fans all over the world men women they were all writing letters to him and they were you know expressing their grief their sorrow and their prayers for saving him and one of those letters was his assistant was a baby Arthur there's a letter for you from your fan and the fan your fan is asking you have your work questioned with god you are such a wonderful player you are such a wonderful person you are a gentleman you are a kind person you are so good but why god has chosen you for this deadly disease for this deadly disease that was the question asked then you know what adores responded to that adores responded that you know if you take the war they'll give about five million people who play some game or the other some game or the other out of five million people that 50 lakh people five lakh people five people play perhaps tennis out of five lakh people fifty thousand people play at school level or college level out of fifty thousand people you know uh five thousand people play at their national level out of five thousand people five hundred people play the ATP Association of Tennis Problems circuit out of five hundred people fifty people could get the opportunity to play Wimbledon in Wimbledon tournament out of those 50 people four people reach semi finals and two people reach finals and ultimately one person stands on the podium holding the trophy along and when I was holding the trophy out there then I did not ask the god why have you chosen me for this I did not ask him on that day and I would not ask him today I know I have a purpose and I've come on this planet God has brought me I I I trust in God I go by God and I have not asked I have not asked why me how about you how about you you also go through no we all go through difficulties we all go through difficulties very very big difficulties what did I do what wrong did I do what sin I did they do why problems come only to me as if you know the problems come only to you I don't know whether you went through sometimes even I uh I felt that you know God why I'm such a good person I don't know how many somebody but why did I get this problem even you know that's there moment but look at him look at him there is something that we could learn from these people these people you know this is a paddy field this is a paddy field in my native place in my native place you know the farmers and every day suppose they're using tractors but this is some years ago some years ago you know the paddy cultivation that happens in this manner so much trajectory so much difficulty then you plan then you plan the crop looks so good but then suddenly when the crop is nearing harvest you have the nabamba cyclones and that cycle the entire crop largest gets submerged under water if the water does not go off in a matter of two or three days you would lose all the crop the crop germinates and you will have a problem you will have a problem you will have a problem you have somehow survived this secure this and I had to I had to you know visit my village and I asked my mama my mama my maternal uncle mama what happened what happened to your report your entire report such a hard work oh my god the crop is lost oh my god I was expressing my my my unhappiness my worry my sadness that he was losing the whole crop do you know what my mama the farmer said my mama a farmer he said hey a killer season next year it will be very good next year it will be very good my god I was thinking of what's happening there and he was hoping he was hopeful the next season will be better the next year will be better the next year will be better that hope that hope that hope I could learn from my mama that day yes the better days are ahead Jobe what I it is happening for my betterment the something better is waiting for me something better is waiting for me something better is waiting for me I did not get this I lost this I missed this but something better is waiting for me what a what a way of reconciling what a way of enduring endurance that's called endurance that's called that will give you the silence life is like coffee I'm sharing some stories with you of course I hope you are enjoying these stories for enjoying the stories stories type yes in the chart box please for enjoying the stories this is another story you know these days you see lots of you know people going back to their alma mater the college where they studied alumni the particular batch making coming together and meeting the alumni meets the college you know once in an alumni once in an alumni had they get together on the campus so people came from all the towns back to the campus they were all having great time and their professor their professor who taught them was there the campus he invited them to his home for a cup of coffee and they all went there they were sitting there about 10 12 of them 10 12 of them were there the professor served in the coffee served in the coffee in the kettle in the big kettle they brought the calf coffee there coffee there and then he kept the cups on the tee pie on the tee pie he kept the cups but you know he didn't have all the 12 cups of the same size same color same make he didn't have all the cups of the same type he had some four or five very good porcelain imported cups and very good cups la la la la type cups he had and then he had two or three two or three local make ceramic cups and he had a couple of steel glasses and a couple of glasses glasses okay and a few paper cups paper cups are also so what happened he asked these students who are his students he asked them to sell themselves to sell themselves so the guys who went first what they did they took those better looking cups and they served the coffee the guys who went next they use the you know the local make then the other guys use some steel glasses then the final guys use those paper cups finally they all served they all came back sat there they were holding the cups they are holding the cups and they were sipping the coffee they were sipping the coffee but what kind of thoughts are going in their mind the guy who was holding the paper cup what bloody this professor what was he doing all along all these years he could not buy even cups bloody what is this coffee he's giving in paper cup huh other guy was thinking you know the guy with this oh he was holding the cup oh yes he could get a better cup and he was feeling a little better but in meeting this guy there's other guys different guys were going through different feelings based on the kind of cup they were holding but actually they were all drinking the same coffee the same coffee they are not eating the cup but they're drinking the same coffee but while drinking the same coffee the way they're savoring the coffee they're enjoying the coffee they are the flavor of the coffee are they enjoying that are going by themselves comparing comparing with others they were going through those emotions without actually enjoying the smell and taste of the coffee yes yes it happens with you with me also without we go you know we go by this we come from i am a happy what is your happiness you are having your you are having your small cup what is that but that monotone is good enough for you and you are happy with it how are you i is this kind of comparison is this kind of comparison with us what kind of feelings emotions it's giving you you have to take care of it take the other small story that i want to share with you once a grandfather was sharing a story to his grandchild grandchild once upon a time there were two worlds one black wolf and one white wolf and they're different better they're different you know the black wolf is always very angry wolf very angry very cruel very crooked and very unkind very very much you know dangerous there is another one the white wolf very calm quiet balanced loving harmonious you know very pleasant very polite very happy balanced wolf dadaji dadaji which wolf is stronger is a black wolf and white wolf out of these two worlds the black wolf which is very very cruel very angry very much annoyed very much you know disturbed very much frustrated always short tempered you know that wolf is quite calm balanced you know all those you know good emotions that wolf which one is stronger you tell me you tell me which one is stronger what do you think which wolf is stronger out of these two you know what his dadaji told him his dadaji told him the beta out of these two worlds the wolf which you feed the most that becomes the strongest the one you feed most what kind of emotions you're feeding to yourself in fact both these wolves are there in our mind and we have in our mind also the black wolf is there the white wolf is there both of them in your mind as in my mind we have these two worlds in our mind also but what are we feeding our mind with our we're feeding our mind with love compassion care kindness what is that what is that our hatred jealousy you know all the negative emotions negativity what are we feeding with like dadaji said what are the emotions what are you feeding the feeding most the positive emotions to your mind that gives you the positivity the balance that you require that's how it's important that we have to we are all the time feeding we are all the time feeding we are all the time feeding knowingly or unknowingly consciously unconsciously we are feeding what are we feeding we have to be careful we have to be careful you know everyone have to be careful and there's a principle called 90 10 principle this is given by steven kovid this man is a great author steven kovid steven kovid steven kovid you know he wrote a book called the seven habits of highly effective people which is sold in millions of copies and also he wrote another book the seven habits of highly effective families families as a habit there's nothing in the book and in that you know he he talks about he talks about 90 10 principle 90 10 principle what is this 90 10 principle this 90 10 whatever the kind of emotions you go through whatever the situation you go through the kind of emotions because suppose you're so angry or so frustrated or so happy whatever it is the external influence is only 10 percent 90 percent is how you respond to it the external the external influence is only 10 percent and the actual thing that your emotions are more controlled by 90 percent of how you react you react suppose you know you're almost getting ready you're getting ready to go to your office and you you had your bath and you were wearing the white shirt nice shirt and you came down there and you are having your your breakfast and your wife has given you that eat late dosa what is sambar and everything and she kept a cup of coffee there cup of coffee there and your child was also ready to go to school and your child was ready to go to school and she was also getting ready she completed her breakfast and in her hurry she hid that coffee cup and the coffee spilled over well all you are white shirt what did you do what did you do at that time what do you think you're blind what happened to you did you raise your hand what did you do and your chain started crying you know your chain started crying and you know in the meantime your wife came and she was trying to cool her down and you went upstairs you went upstairs and by the time you know you wanted to the school bus came the school bus came your child is crying and she could not get into the school bus she could not get into the school bus and the bus left and you came down and then you had to drop today your child at the school so ultimately you took your child because you were getting late to the office so what did you do you drove you drove first your child to the school and your child got down from the car today today she did not turn back she didn't say papa bye bye i love you papa she did not say she quietly got down the car and went to the school without waving at you and then you were getting late to the office so you were driving very fast and the traffic police stopped you and fined you for over speeding and finally you landed at your office and you opened the door of your car to get down and realize that you missed your briefcase your office briefcase in your home itself right and go to the office and then the evening when you come back home your wife is silent she was not speaking much you are not speaking much and some kind of silence was happening and silence the silence is sometimes very dead you know it's frightening it's frightening somebody has to speak something and silence was prevailing in the hope because of what happened the way you shouted at the morning the way you shouted at your small kid at your home in the morning she in the morning same situation imagine the child hit the coffee cup the coffee fell on your shirt you took a moment you passed you understood the situation you passed said and you were chained this bit uh you know uh worried said don't worry don't worry don't worry it happens it happens it's not your fault that they say okay by mistake it happened don't worry don't worry come on take it no problem don't no issues okay you get ready go to the school okay let me go up and change the dress you didn't react you rather passed and responded responded with balance and you're chasing love you papa sorry papa really sorry papa love you papa and she gave you a kiss and your cheek and okay papa bye bye and she went she took her bus and she went to the office and he went up and in the meantime your wife got your lunchbox ready for back ready and she gave the bag and you drove that down and you felt so good that you child you know you you felt so good for the behavior for the composure for the balance you possessed to that moment so 10 percent that quality that your child's actions only 10 percent 90 percent what followed is totally dependent on how do you react this is how it happens this is how and the important thing is how can you be can you be balanced can you be balanced can you be balanced okay so that yeah and exactly the last thing that I would like to share here is about life you know what do you think is a boomerang is a boomerang they call it a boomerang boomerang is something when you throw it it goes from distance it again comes back to you it throw it comes back to you that's boomerang okay similarly you know life also life is an equal whatever we give it comes back to us it comes back to the multiples it comes back to the multiples yes sir yes 100 percent it comes back to the multiples in this life itself you see janam main we get it back yes you know have you ever tried going to a palace a palace and a big building at a at a fort in Hyderabad we have world called a fort you know and yeah you have forts and you just you go there and say hello you will say hello you hear that you go right you go you say hey and hey hey hey and all that if I say love you you will say love you love you say hate you hate you eat it he calls it he calls at home and also in the office fill your heart with love mind with compassion mind with compassion kindness and be kind to yourself be kind to yourself most importantly not only being kind we have you are mostly kind to other people but if you have emotional intelligence means you are first becoming kind to yourself and deserve it that is a platinum rule that is a platinum rule is that you be to yourself what you want to be to others be unto yourself what you want to be for others generally you are kind to others but are you kind to yourself are you taking good care of your health your physical health your intellectual health your mental health your health are you taking care of it take care of it take care of it especially the mental health the emotional health there's a lot of room and opportunity for you and for me but everyone out there in today's scenario to develop this emotional balance emotional intelligence at the end of the emotional intelligence nothing but first getting that awareness becoming aware when you're going through you know you go through the emotion when you're going through the emotion hey Shiva you're becoming angry you're becoming angry okay okay okay you you tell yourself you become aware and try to understand who you're going through anger now and what about your spouse what about your boss what about your subordinate who are you dealing with at that moment in that moment what is that person what kind of emotional person is going through you perceive that you perceive you can easily perceive that by the tone of the pitch voice of the pitch the words being used the eyes you can perceive it oh he's also going through emotion she's also going through emotion at that moment you have control balance use your emotional intelligence and that will help you save your relationships and make you more successful make you more successful in life okay that's what and that's some emotion that is essential for career success hundred percent it's essential emotions can be controlled yes they can be controlled like that like that like that as they just snap your fingers I am not responding I am you know yes you have to decide from today from this moment onwards I am becoming more and more emotionally intelligent I will have control I will have control on my emotions I will not be controlled by my emotions I will have emotions in my brain they've run either wronga they've has neither hosunga till vahra hosunga till vahra vunga but under my control yes emotions can be controlled so emotional intelligence nothing but first becoming aware of your emotions and other emotions and then managing your emotions you cannot manage other emotions never forget about managing others you cannot manage any not your wife not your son not your daughter not your father not your mother not your boss not your subordinate not the pure in your office never never try to control others emotions but you have total control on your emotions so please manage your emotions and today these are some of the tips I gave you and the most intelligent everything happens for good that kind of you know thank you god thank you he takes you through some struggles to make you better and stronger have faith in god complete faith in god you know he knows everything have that faith in god be hopeful from that farmer rice farmer my mama that's what i'll learn don't compare this comparison leads to a lot of emotional disturbances comparing comparison comparison never compare don't compare this comparison never ends if you start comparing it never ends if you compare this tomorrow you become that compare somebody else okay feed the positive emotions like the white wolves white wolf feed that positivity not the negativity and 90 10 principle 90 percent control yes and life is an eco life is a record can i have a small declaration from you yes please stretch your hand unmute unmute your microphones please everybody please unmute your microphones and say i know emotional intelligence helps me i know come on give me a high five yourself and say you are awesome thanks to manage thanks to rain comment for giving me this wonderful opportunity of you know spending time with you and giving you something thank you very much thanks to all of you please take good care of your health and your safety safety stay strong stay safe stay healthy god bless you all thank you thank you thank you very much thank you sir thank you sir i anybody would like to give feedback about this vijay kumar sir today session is like that your name is shiva prasad no it's like a shiva prasad your shiva was given a prasad in the form of you that's all i i don't want to say much more shiva was given a prasad to people or audience through you that is shiva prasad we got today love you sir love you vijay kumar sir feeling blessed god bless you sir love you sir thank you sir that's enough sir i'm feeling blessed oh my god what a powerful feedback you are giving me thank you god bless you so bangala ji sir it was a very nice session sir and the examples given were very nice sir and it was really very interesting and it made the examples were such that we could understand the concept very well sir and it was really very informative sir thank you thank you for your excellent participation ma'am you are a student director of agriculture still part schedule like a small college student who participates so enthusiastically you did that i could see that in you thank you so much and god bless you ma'am so apart from your nice presentation i like your energy level sir how you are maintaining this energy level very high even at this age this age oh my god that's that's really nice and fantastic and may i pray may god bless you to you to maintain this energy level sir thank you thank you sir sir people like you give me the energy sir the way you participated the way you contributed the way you are you you are participating that response that i'm getting that those things that keep me energy taken thank you thank you for that thank you very much